Newspaper Page Text
20
THE ATL ANTI AN
CHILDS HOTEL AND CAFE
3
Blocks
from
Terminal
Station.
In the
heart of
Business
District.
lighted
rooms.
2
Blocks
from
Union
Depot.
Hot and
Cold
Water
and
stationery
wash
stands in
every
room.
E. BASIL, Prop.
ALSO PRIVATE BATHS-
An Up-to-Date Cafe for Ladies and Gentlemen
BUFFET IN CONNECTION
science South Carolina has stood al
most alone in the South. The origin
and existence of this association may
be traced to the scientific views of
the South. Local State geological
surveys were first proposed in the
South, if not in South Carolina, al
though Massachusetts was the first
to carry them into effect. These sur
veys induced geologists to form an
association for comparing note3 and
connecting their observations, and of
that association, the one now holding
its meetings is the result. But a new
and important movement now origin
ates in Charleston. No civil author
ity of any description has in any
previous instance come forward, un
solicited, to sustain a voluntary asso
ciation for scientific purposes; Char-
lestion has not only volunteered, but
claimed the privilege of so doing.
This augur3 well for the future pros
pects of science in this country.”
P. H. MELL.
WHEN HE WENT TO THE
FRONT.
‘ ‘ Did year hear that George went to
tho front yesterday?” asked the brother
of Ethel.
Ethel’s fare blanched. ‘‘Why, what
do you mean, Jack? Tie never told me.”
‘‘Well, I saw him go,” said the broth
er as ho reached for his hat. ‘‘Don't
you remember last evening, when ho
kissed you first on your right cheek and
then on your left, and then didn’t he go
to tho front?”
WORSE AND WORSE.
In a certain hotel in a certain Southern
town a certain group of gentlemen—a
colonel, judge, a doctor, two majors and
a captain or so—used to play poker. Al
ways they were waited upon by a shrewd
old negro. The grand jury sometimes fell
an official curiosity regarding this poker
game, and upon one occasion sent for (lie
old negro, hoping to extort from him evi
dence upon which to base indictments for
gaming.
In answer to the foreman’s questions
tlie old man admitted readily enough that
he waited upon certain gentlemen who, he
said, gathered regularly in a specified
room of the hotel. To the best of his
belief they played a game with cards
and chips for money takes. Then the
bead of the grand jury called upon him
to give names.
‘ ‘ Boss, I M lak to obleege you, sail, de
hes’ in de world,” said Uncle John,
‘ ‘ but hit can't be did. You see, sail,
always before dent gen’l’men starts in
playin’ dey has a toddy—sometimes dey
has two or three toddies. And bein’ puf
fed gen ’l ’men dey always leaves a lit
tle bit in de glasses and I drinks it.
And, boss, dat whisky meks me so drunk
dat afterward I never kin remember -i
single one of detn. ’ ’
The grand jury sent him away, after
: threatening him with jail. As he was
leaving, with many bows and profuse
apologies, the foreman called him back
and ordered him to report again in a
week.
‘‘In the meanwhile,” he commanded
sternly, ‘‘T don't want you to take any
drinks, and in addition you had better
go to a doctor and get something that
will assist your memory.”
Uncle John promised to do so and with
drew. True to orders he was back again
in a week, smiling blandly upon the in
quisitors.
“Now then, Uncle John,” said tho
foreman, ‘ ‘ how about it ? ”
“Boss, ’ said Uncle John with a win
ning grin, “Ise monstrus sorry to hub
to disap ’int you gen ’1 ’men again, but
’tain’t my fault dis time. I went to
Doctor Brooks, jes lak you told me, and
I axed him fur somethin ’ to he ’p my
wits. But he muster gimme somethin ’
outen de wrong bottle, ’case de medicine
done plum destroy my memory entirely
and now I can’t remember nothin’ ’tall.”
WHO HE WAS.
The Court was having trouble getting
a satisfactory jury.
‘ ‘ Is there any reason why you could
not pass impartially on the evidence for
and against the prisoner?” asked the
judge of a prospective juror.
“Yes,” was the reply, “the very looks
of that man makes me think he is
guilty. ’ ’
“Why, man,” exclaimed the judge,”
“that’s the prosecuting attorney! ”
GOOD FOR THE HAIR.
“Is music of any practical benefit?”
asked a man of his neighbor at a con
cert.
“Well,” answered the cynic, “judging
from the pictures of eminent performers,
it must bo great for keeping the hair
from falling out.”
SHE’D GOT RELIGION.
A colored girl, belonging to Governor
Wickliffe, of Kentucwy, once asked per
mission to go to a near-by town to attend
a religious revival.
A few weeks later the Governor hap
pened to notice her and said to her:
“Well, Jane, did you get religion?”
‘ ‘ I surely did, sir! ” she replied.
‘ ‘ Well, Jane, what difference has it
made in you?”
“Oh, sir, I sweeps under the rugs
now! ’ ’
Patience is never conquered; she is
always victorious, and ever remains at
last mistress of the position.—Catherine
of Sienna.
“Cultivate the great art of leaving
people alone, even those you think you
have a right to direct in the minutest
particular.”
’ ’Do not. resent temptation; do not be
perplexed because it seems to thicken
round you more and more, and ceases
neither for effort, nor for agony, nor for
prayer. That is your practice, which
God appoints you, and it is having its
effect in making you patient and humble
and generous and unselfish and kind
and courteous.”
To be really happy wo must have:
More virtue than knowledge
More love than tenderness
More guidance than cleverness
More health than riches
More repose than profit.
—Anon.