Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

6 THE ATLANTIAN WISE CHARLIE. A prominent senator had a very intel ligent Chinese servant, named Charlie. One of Charlie’s relatives died and he asked permission to attend the funeral. “Certainly,” said the senator, then he added: “I suppose you will put some food in the grave, as the Chinese do?” “Yes, sir,” replied Charlie, solemnly. “When do you expect your friend will eat the food you put in his grave, Charlie?” “At the same time, sir, that your friend whom you buried a few days ago will smell of the flowers that you put on his grave, ’ ’ replied Charlie, respect fully. A PUZZLING QUESTION. The late Sylvanus Miller, civil engi neer, who was engaged in railroad en terprises in Central America, was very fond of relating incidents that had oc curred while ho was in that country. Ono day ho asked a native: “How long docs it take you to carry your goods to market by mule-back?” “Three days,” replied the man. “Well,” said Miller, “then you can understand what a groat amount of good our road will do for you. With that in operation you could take your goods to market and bo back at homo in one day. ’ ’ “Yes, very good, senor,” said the na tive, “but what would wo do with the other two days?” A CLEVER TRICK. A traveling mnn entered tho dining room of a leading hotel in Buffalo on Monday, and as the waiter was serving him ho drew a two-dollar bill from his pocket, and showing it to him said: “Bill, I shall remain here until Thurs day night, and then this will bo yours. ’ ’ “Thank you, sir; I’ll take tho best of care of you, sure, sir,” replied the waiter. And ho did cater to tho traveler and servo him excellently. It so happened that on Thursday morning tho traveler was hastily summoned to Chicago, and it was weeks before ho returned to the Buffalo, hotel. Shortly, his former waiter, whom ho had forgotten nlong with tho incident, came up to him and said: “Say, boss, pleaso play that two-dollar trick on your now waiter, for I’se got a spcc’al grudgo ’gainst him; lie’s do meanes ’ man what’s in do whole house. ’ ’ THE ULTRA RICH. Mrs. Richloy had recently purchased a suburban estate, and was entertaining a poor relation, who remarked: “What splendid fowls! Do they lay well?” “Oh, they can lay beautifully,” re marked tho hostess, “but of course, in our position they don’t have to.” CALL THE LAWYER. “Are ye much burted, Tim?” inquired a friend. “Do ye want a docthcr?” “A docther, yo know nothin’. After bein’ runned over bo a tlirollcy car? Phwat Oi want is a lawyer. ’ ’ Great Meeting of Shriners Early in May there will be held at Dallas, Texas, the Imperial Council of all the Shriners in the United States. Atlanta rejoices in a branch of this organization known as Yaarab Temple which, with its 2,100 members, is the greatest temple in the South of this unique and splendid society. As a social and fraternal society the Shrine is not surpassed by any other in the world, even though others may count a larger membership. Everything that the Shriners undertake to do is done with a thoroughness and a finish rarely equaled. On May 9th, with Capt. J. 0. Seamans in command, 500 members of Yaarab Temple, in their special train, will pull out for the Dallas meeting. All the principal cities of the country wifi be repre sented at this meeting, but not one of them will be able to make a finer showing than Atlanta, and though the Shriners are going on their own business, and not as an advertisement of Atlanta, it cannot be doubted that this brilliant battalion will .impress the visitors from other sec tions that Atlanta is one of the big cities of our country, and that when it comes to a show-down we do not propose to take a back seat for anybody. The good wishes of The Atlantian will follow the Shriners. May they have a pleasant excursion, a profita ble meeting and return home determined to better their past good record. Carlos H. Mason Mr. Carlos Mason has again been elected as chairman of the police board. This is a deserved compliment for conscientious service, for whether one grees or not with Mr. Mason in all his views it must be admitted that his service as chairman of the board has been marked by fair ness, good temper, patience and industry. It is a vexa tious position in many respects, and the incumbent must often come in for criticism, but Mr. Mason has not allow ed himself to be swerved from what has seemed to him the iust course by either friend or foe, and his re-election as head of the board is ample justification of his past official acts. --’•Y'l* R. O. Cochran A new member of the General Assembly, Mr. R. 0. Cochran, will carry into that body a thorough mental equipment, a soundness of judgment and a strength of conviction, that will be surpassed by no member of that body. Mr. Cochran, a young man as years count, has in the last ten years made a brilliant business success, build ing one of the larger real estate businesses of the city. This he did by reason of his remarkable concentration on whatever business might be for the moment under con sideration. When Mr. Cochran became a candidate for the Gen eral Assembly he made one of the most quiet campaigns ever known here, but he put into the same qualities of concentration and thoroughness which he carries into other matters and was easily one of the victors. One thing especially makes Mr..Cochran a valuable acquisition to the legislative body, he is essentially a man of his own mind, who after giving a matter thorough and impartial examination comes to a conclusion from which he can be moved only by new evidence. SPECIALIZATION. Mrs. Sutton advertised for a woman to do general housework, and in answer a colored girl called, announcing that she had come for the position. “Are you a good cook?” asked Mrs. Sutton. “No, indeed, I don’t cook,” was the reply. “Are you a good laundress?” “I wouldn’t do washin’ and ironin’; it's too hard on tho hands. “Can you sweep?” asked Mrs. Sut ton. “No,” was the positive answer. “I’m not strong enough. ’ ’ “Well,” said the lady of the house, quite exasperated, “may I ask what you can do?” ‘ ‘ I dusts, ’ ’ came tho placid reply.— Everybody's Magazine. IMPERTINENT QUESTION. A countryman, on his first visit to the city, registered at one of the hotels. He did not ask regarding the plan of the hotel or explain how ho proposed to be come a guest. “European or American?” asked the clerk. The man looked very much surprised. “Why, American, of course,” he re plied, emphatically. ‘ ‘ Born and raised in the country about fifty miles south of here. I don’t look like no foreigner, do I?” A. BAD FINANCIER. Two Hebrews, meeting one day, were (discussing local news. “You know .Take Steiner, vot vas sick las’ week?” “Ya, sure I do.” “Veil, he has had his appendix taken 'avay from him.” “Veil, dot vas too bad. But it serves him a’right; ho should ’av ’ad it in his wife’s name.” AT POKER. If you draw to a flush and fail to fill, do not continue the conflict. If you hold a pair of trays, and your opponent is blind, and it costs you fifty to sec him, let him remain unperceived. If you hold nothing but ono ace high, and by some means you know that the other man holds the rest of tho aces, and ho calls, exeuso yourself. Let him call again another time. IMAGE OF GEORGE. In Paducah, Kentucky, a statue of the Indian chief, Paduke, after whom tho city was named, was being unveiled, when two negroes were heard talking. ‘ ‘ It sho do look lak him, ’ ’ declared one. ‘ ‘ Look Ink who ? ’ ’ asked the other. ‘ ‘ Gawge Washington, of co ’se. ’ ’ The city editor looked over tho manu script the caller had handed him. “If I run this item, madam,’’ he said, “T shall have to use the blue pencil on about nine-tenths of it. ’ ’ ‘ ‘ Oh, that’s too much trouble! ’ ’ she exclaimed. “Let mo have it again, and I ’ll write it all with a blue pencil. ’ ’