Newspaper Page Text
THE ATLANTIAN
December, 1918
Gunter-Watkins Drug Co.
Cor. Peachtree and Walton St.
PRESCRIPTIONS
CAREFULLY
COMPOUNDED
and filled by experienced Licensed Pharmacists.
Everything Neat, Clean and Up-to-Date.
We Want Your Business.
Gunter-Watkins Drug Co.
Cor. Peachtree and Walton Sts.
ATLANTA GEORGIA
THE TRIO COMPLETED. SNAP.
MAMMA’S BOY.
The Fag—Oh, I’d go 'to war quick
enough, hut mother wouldn’t like me
since the day I was born.
The Snag—(Well, if she was hoping
for a daughter, I’m sure you’ve done
your best to console her.—Sidney
Bulletin.
tan 'the Kaiser’s hide.
Count ’em: Sixteen loaded ships on
(the Kaiser’s track.
Here’s a hunch: Just watch this
bunch, sixteen coming back!
OF LOW DEGREE.
“That old judge is a Doctor of
Law.’’
“And he didnH go to college to
get his degree."
“Why not?”
“Well, he’s been doctoring laws ever
since he got into office.”—Jack-o’-
Lantern.
“Art at a low ebib, I call it.”
“Huh?”
“The artist painted this picture as
a pot boiler, and the purchaser bought
it to fill a gap between two book
cases."
She—tls that button for the light?
He—Yes, for -the Light or DaTk.
—Widow.
HAPPY, BUT INARTISTIC.
There was a young lady, and she
When dancing was filled with great
glee,
Bat she couldn’t keep sftep,
And she ruined my rep—
For she always kept stepping on me.
—Punch Bowl.
■ ——i
A PROPER STUDY.
“Shall we send our son to a co
educational college?"
“I’m in favor of it. It won’t hurt
him to learn some thing a'bout wo
men along with his other education.”
BEEN THERE.
Traveler—Yon cannot tell how
terrible an experience it is to be lost
in the desert. *-
Joneson—Oh, yes, I am. I used to
live in a dry town.
AS MUCH AS THEY WORRY HER.
“Your dress,” said the hushand to
his fashionable wife, “will never
please the men.”
“I don’t dress to please the men,”
was the reply, ‘‘but to worry other
women.”
SHOP TALK.
Wife—Did you bill that fly dear?
Aviator Husband-wNo, 'but I drove
him down in a badly damaged condi
tion.—Boston Transcript.
The conversation during dinner be
came quite animated.
“‘A patriot,’ remarked . a witty
young woman, “Is a man who refuses
to hook up his wife’s gown.”.
“And a martyr,” said a man, sitting
opposite, “is one who attempts and
fails, while a hero tries and suc
ceeds.”
“Then what Is a cowM? 1 ' asked
one of the party.
“Oh, a coward,” replied the witty
young woman, “is a man who remains
Bingle, ,so he won’t have to try.”
“Another drafe evader,65 said an
onlooker.—Detroit Free Press.
Have a heart for your poor epiglot
tis,
Don’t crowd down your victuals, for
what is
More sad than the sight
Of a wind-pipe plugged tight
When the food fails to see where the
slot is.
—The (Limeratomy.
AT LAST.
Pullman Passenger—IWeli, iRastus,
I hear that Uncle Sam is now in
charge of your sleeping car. .
Potter—Yes, sah; Ah knew sooner
or later he was going to get this here
berth-control,—Chlcag|p (Medical Re
corder.
"An easy job will suit me.”
“How about winding the clocks
every week?”
“I might make that do. But what’s
the matter with tearing the leaves off
the calendar every month?”—Le Rdre
(Paris).
LISP OR LUMP IT.
“The Government has even cut
down conversation at teas.”
‘‘What do you mean?”
“Why, you can’t even ask a guest
‘How many lumps do you take?”’—
Baltimore American.
ALL HE COULD GET.
“And so you sacrificed your good
name and everything for a paltry
dollar?” asked the preached.
“Sure!" replied the village tough.
“That was all the fellow had!”—Yonk
ers Statesman.
A MODEL.
“That ladies’ tailor neither smokes,
drinks, swears, nor chews.”
“Well, a ladies’ tailor has to be a
man of good habits.”—Baltimore
American.
MEDICAL TERM.
“You must isolate the patient."
“All right, Doctor; where shall we
put the ice?”—’Baltimore American.