Newspaper Page Text
November 1, 1920
THE ATLANTIAN
19
The Ballade of Don Marquis.
(From “The Bowling Green’’ in the
Evening Post.)
There’s a thrill and a throb in the air,
Like the heartbeat of drums passing
by,
Or a jolly jazz band at a fair,
Or the popping of corks on the sly;
Who cares if the country’s gone dry,
What matter if creditors dun!
My rent has been . raised, what
care I,
Don Marquis is back on the Sun!
Away with the demon Despair!
Bid Gloom spread his bat-winds and
fly
To caverns of darkness nor dare
The spell of the Marquis defy;
Black Boredom is sentenced to die
And Bathos and Bunk are undone,
The world spins no longer awry
Don Marquis is back on the Sun!
Spread the tidings of joy every
where,
Let its message rejoice every eye
That all ina treasure may share
More precious than dolars can buy;
Emblazon the news on the sky,
That thousands may read as they run
In letters a hundred feet high,
Don Marquis is back on the Sun 1
LET “DAD DO IT”
192 Courtland St.
Recognize Them?
There are people who fail because
they ate afraid to make a beginning
Who are too honest to steal, but
will borrow and never pay back.
Who go to bed tired because •
spend the day in looking for an easy
place.
Who can play a tune on one string
but it never makes anybody want to
dance.
Who would like to reform the
world, but have a front gate that
won’t stay shut.
Who cannot tell what they think
about anything until they see what
the papers have to say about it.—
Better Farming.
Looking Ahead.
Husband (to wife over phone):
Good news, dear. I’m pretty well
played out, tramping all over town,
but I’ve found an apartment at last.
Wife (ecstatically): Oh, Horace,
you darling! Do hurry home and tell
me all about it.
“There’s no great hurry. We don’t
have to move in until 1923. The pres
ent tenants have a two years’ lease.”
There’s just one thing the-Bolshe
vik in America can do well—he can
dampen the-fire under the Melting
Pot 1—New York Sun.
Federal Market
Opposite the Post Office
32 Walton Street
We are agents for famous
Brooks County Hams
and Pork Sausage
First Class Western Meats
• Dressed Poultry
Fresh Eggs
Drop in and see us.
Every thing up to the minute
in every respect.
Federal Market
32 Walton Street
CROWN DRUG CO.
Junction WHITEHALL & FORSYTH STREETS
Cigars, Cigarettes, Tobacco, Per
fumes, Face Powder, etc.
Toilet Articles of every
description
Periodicals, Gandies, Ice Cream
and Coca-Cola
A Clean Quiet Place for Ladies and Gentlemen
PHONE CALL MAIN 1677
Jack’s Narrow Escape.
When John McCormack was sing
ing in grand opera, as Signor Foli
some years ago, he had on one occa
sion to sing from a stage balcony
which was hardly strong enough to
support so heavy a man. The stage
manager told off two assistants to
hold it up from beneath, but before
Signor Foli was more than half
through one of the men below said:
“Be jabers, Moike, the Oitalian is
moighty heavy I”
“Let’s drop him, Pat; he’s only an
Oitalian, after all.”
Voice of Signor Foli above :“Will
ye, ye divils, will*ye?”
“Tare an’ ’ounds, Pat, but he’s an
Oirishmanl Hould him up for the
loife of yezl”—Boston Transcript.
The Hot-Air Pump.
To inflate tire, ' attach intake re
ceiver near your wife and kick about
amount of dressmaker or millinery
bille. The result is wonderful.
One Isn’t—That’s All.
They boast down at Harvard of Stie-
ger, •
Whose -interest in life was so meager,
A bull full of pep
Couldn’t quicken “Steig’s” step—
It is wretched bad form to seem
eager I
999,827,827 say, “Guess who this is!"
over the telephone.
726,932,888 are members of families
which have fruit pictures hanging in
their dining rooms.
220,738 are head waiters who ask,
“How many?” when they see two per
sons approaching.
S23 went crazy* during the past year
while trying to fish short spoons out
of olive jars.
Seventeen are able to exclude all
the crumbs while eating toast in bed.
Three are able to sharpen a lead
pencil into a wastebasket and get all
the sharpenings into the basket.
By the Sea.
Romantic Parent: Some still main
tain they can see people smuggling
on this beach at night.
Little Boy: Yes, I know. Grandma
said it’s disgusting.—London Mail.
If you want to lose your good name
have it engraved upon your umbrel
la.—Bindery Talk.
‘Elbert can’t get away from his
golf.”
“How’s that?”
“After he swings a shovel of coal
in the furnace he stoops down to re
place the turf.”