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NEW ERA.
Wm. A. BREOKENRIEOE, Publisher,
“Ottward and Upward.”
SUBSCRIPTION i $1.50 Per Annum.
■ : VOIXMK.-l.
DALLAS, PAUI,DING COUNTY, GA., APRIL 12. 1883.
NUMBER i.
PROrtUSSIONAL CARDS.
J^R. 8. ROBERTSON,
. PHYSICIAN &SURQE0N,
T«td«r« hit professional services In the
prsetios of medicine in nil ils branches to
the citizens i nf. Dalles end surrounding
country. *•‘0711ice No. 5 Acworth street,
■ear court house.
W. It. FlKI.DKR.
CEO. It. RO BKRTt
J1IELDER & ROBERTS,
Attorneys at law,
Dellas. Paulding County, Georgia.
Praotioe in ell the courts. Prompt nttsn-
lion Riven to looking after wild Inna claims.
Collections a speoia'ty. 1 1 y
‘attorney at i.aw,
. Dallas, Paulding Count'/,,Georgia.
Prompt attention : given to collections in
anv part of the Stale. Wild lands looked,
after and intruders ejocted.
~H4 h—v I—I—— 1 —-
CUT
THIS
HUT
Only ons net m nt to Inti oduec !♦ gents wftn’td nnd
i P»<W p©*- (IrMflara fro*. Addfsm til® mtnifiot*
Hr#*, iflBAWMUT SIliVBN PLATE Ctt.,% RrOom-'
And s«ncl it. with i(H4r®< n Stnmps sml
w® will send onn * untie set of 6 new style
“Myrtlo” triple plstnd Tra^ponns. Cor.
tains no hrnse, warrnntrd pc nutn®, rqusl
Hold itreet, Bastor, Mans.
YOU 0 AN HAVE ANY KIND OF
Sewing Machine Repaired.
All KindUlf Needles,
Attachments, Parts, Etc., Etc.
—OF—
P. MoOORMACK,
61 8. Broad St., Atlanta, Ga.
MTSend Machines by Express.
#37.35 FOR #i»l.
Xnilc for the Million.—Vienna Kollo■
l.alilnl Organ.
Hwaatest and most delightful music know.
Popular in Europe. Any tune can be played
©n It,-from Old Hundred in Yankee Doodles
E?en those **wlth no ear** while away <le*
liicltfnl hours with 1hls instrument. Any
one ©an play It. Children play it in one
evening. Costs hut one-tenth as much as
the Orgsnette, Or^anina, eto., and is f«r
sweeter nnd needa oniy common music. To
introduce our new music we will send a sam
ple Organ, with bound -hook containing full
word* and music of new aud popular
song*, which In $he«*t form sell for $36.35,
prepaid to any address for ONLY $1.
C. O. D.—As a guarantee that every one
will reoeive all they pay for, we will send
on 5 'sample book and organ by express C.
O. D„ $1-00; two for $1 60; three, $2.30, or
more at the rate of 39 per dosen. We can*-
not prer*v goods sent O. D. Circulars
free. /- <dre*s MONA.DNOOK MUSIC CO ,
Lock Box 780, Hinsdale, N. H.
NEWS GLEANINGS.
... A (160,000. factory will be erected at
Len Island shoals, on the Coosa river,
Alabama.
a
With $1,200,000 in the state treasury,
Virginia offers a fine field for an enter
prising treaturer.
Sullivan county, Tenn., has some rich
aim deposits that only need capitrl to
le properly developed.
The water power on the Chattahoochee
river, in the vicinity of Columbus, is es
timated at 100,000 horse power.
Mississippi 1ms 1,479 manufacturing
establishments with a capital of #4,727,-
000 ; value of products, $7,618,802.
The Confederate cemetery at Raleigh,
has recently been much improved
through the exertions ofjthe women i f
dhrtt city.
South Carolina has 2,078 manufactu
ring establishments, with a capital of
$1,206,894 invested." Value of products
#10,738,008.
The manufacture of whale oil is among
new Southern industries. Over $80,-
000 worth of it has been shipped from
Brunswick.
There are 40,000 square miles of al
most unbroken forests in Nortli Caro
lina, comprising pine, chestnut, oak,
mnp'e, beach and hickory timber.
Nearly 19,010,000 feet of lumber has
been shipped from Pensacola this season.
Chattanooga wants to tax the drum
mers $100 each.
^ he cotton crop of 1882 is officially
estimated at 6,800,000 bales, Texas
heading the list with 1,859,666, and
Mississippi coming next with 1,042,000
haler.
Two prominent steamship owners
from Liverpool are in Savannah in con
sultation with merchants with a view of
putting on several new''stesmalnp9 in
the foreign trade next season.
There arc ninety Mormon missionaries
in the South who calculate to secure
about 700 converts this year. The E 1 -
ders say East and Middle Tennessee are
the most fruitful fields for the mission,
aries.
land near the town, purchased Mulberry TOPICS OP TUP. DAY.
trees and silkworm eggs, given no’tibe of .
, .. . , . A Funuiu goutloimui spreads muslin
applying for a charter mid entered upon w ^ tr0oa , 0 £ utt , h the 1)U , 3 .
the venture in a most businesslike man- j [()ma whon tllpy (a „ , I(J wi „ convert
ner. The . ladies propose to buy a reel;, llem i nto pcrfnmory,
and reel off the sjlk in Sumter instead . ^
of sending the cocoons off, nnd hope to A sft of paper wheels under a truck
have, at some time, a silk manufactory, of an engine on the Central Vermont
Railroad, have been la uso twelve years,
A NEW QUESTION.
and llioy aro still apparently Bound.
TT E. SMITH & CO.,
Jl, - Dallas, Gaoreis,
^"Dealers in Family Groceries, Plain end
Fancy Confectioneries a specialty. Every
thing fresh and nice; Just from the factory !
We desire to say to our friend* and the
public in general that having opened out u
steak of groceries nad confsetioneriec, we
nrtpow.to sell them os cheap ns the cheap
■ tCt. 'sSetMll Profit* and Quick Sales” ska
he our motto. Come and see us and cl
convinced.
THIS ’’ORIGNAL,,
STIR SPANGLED BANNER.
The oldest, most popular, best and cheap*
est Family paper, begins ita 21st year with
1883. It is a largo 8 page, 40 column illus
trated literary paper, size of the “Ledger.”
Cram full of splendid stoviei, sketches, po
em*, wit humor nnd geaeril fun. Raciest
sud most popular paper published. Estah-
liehed 20 years, read by 50,030 persons. It
is solid, substantial, reliable. Only 50 cents
a Tear, 6 copies, $2; or 75 cents a year with
choice of set of six triple plated silver
spoon*. no brass, new style, retail price $1.-
60; or Am. Diotionery, 700 pages, illustrated,
defines 30.000 words, numerous tables,
hound in cloth, srilt, better then usual $1.50
hooks, or wonderful “Multum-in-Parvo”
knife, adozan tools^in one handle, sells at
one to three dollars, buck handle, name
plate, etc., or superb bell harmonica, sweet-
oat musical instrument fcnown, brice rl-50.
Either of above premiums and Banne one
year sent free* for 25 green stamps. Sub
scribe now. Satisfaction guaranteed or
money refunded. Trial trip 3 month for only
10 cents. Specimens free. Address STAR
SPANGLED BANNER, Hinsdale, N. H.
Insure Tour Property Agnlnst Loss
• by rire.
I om agent (or the Continental Insurance Com
pany, which fa confined to the injuring of (4im
property, dwelling*, c lurchei, and school houses,
lor one, three and fi re year*. Eve nr prudent
(celssafe when be knows that If be should ha s
fortunate as to get bis property destroyed by fire
he will have tho greater portion of his losses re
placed. This Is a reliable cof»r*ny, and insures
for a low rate. Call on me, and I s'li give v«u full
ixplanationa. rp . 4. FOOTE.
TTITY T? 17 Send to
JJ Li Pi I'i Business
Send to MOORE’S
University,
Atlanta,. Georgia,
For Illustrated Circular. A live actual bus
iness school. Established tweaty years.
They have a novel way of treating
lunatics in Scotland. Instead of confin
ing them in cells like prisoners, they pnt
them in neat cottages with » plat of
ground to cultivate. All appearance of
restraint is removed, though of course
they are closely watched. The plan is
said to work admirably.
—An albatross will keep pace with •
ship going nine knots an hour, for many
hours,' without moving his wings, ex
cepting a slight feathering, varied as he
wishes to rise or fail.
A gentlem an passing through Worth
Ga , counted a flock of about fifty sheep
and fourtd only four lambs. The mor
tality is attributed solely to the weather.
No cause is known for the murrain
among the cattle.
Two miles south of Montgomery, Air.
Mr. Glass has 220 mulberry trees and
70,000 worms are at work in the first
and second steps which terminate in the
gaudy silk. He expects to realize a
profit this year of $3,000.
There are nearly 100 persons in Glou
cester, King and Queen and King Henry
counties id Virginia, between t’teagrs
of 80 and 100 years, who are in-good
health and ef sound mind. These per-
sons are all natives.
Mobile Register: Tho statement is
going the rounds of the press that Wm.
K. Vanderbilt’s wife is. of Virginia ori
gin. She was born in Mobile, where her
father, Murray F. Smith lived for ma
ny years previous to the war.
Chicago has 6,000 bars, or one to ev
ery 120 inhabitants, while there nre not
much more than twice that number of
stores for the supply of food. Fifteen
blocks, covering three-tenths of a square
mile, contain 225 groggeries.
A large amount of orange wine is now
being shipped North through Jackson-
ville. On Friday last the Waycmss
train took out seventeen cases and two
kegs of the wine. It was consigned fo
parties in New York and New Jersey,
and was manufactured at St. Augustine.
Fort Valley (Ga.) Mirror: Messrs T.
O. Skellie and J. F. Parham, who have
eased tho Wester place, are now plant
ing one hundred acres in watermelon,
Mr. Skellie will also plant twentysfive
acres on his home place, making one
hundred and twenty-five acres in all.
The watermelon crop promises to he
very large in this section, as hundreds
of acres have already been planted.
Florida Times-Union: Mr. Fitzgerald
president of the Palm Paper Company,
of Washington, D. C., which owns the
patent for manufacturing paper from
palmetto fibre, is in the city. His visit
has been (he is now on his way home)
for the purpose of exploring the extent
of the palmetto growth of the State, and
for the selection of a site for an immense
pulp mill, which it is the purpose of the
company to erect in this State.
A number of ladies of Sumter, 8. C.,
(fhes Don Snn4«,Y Brilnt Yl hi»s 4ow VI
Kntlf
fFrofewor Tyti<lnll in NinoUmtli r#l
Theologians yrctv borrillod who* first
informed- that otir planet was u sphere.
Tho question of antipodes exorcised thorn
for a long time, most of them pouring
ridicule on tho idea that men could exist
with their feet turned toward us, and
with their heads pointing downward. I
think it is Sir Georgo Air f y who i efera t< >
tho case of an oVot-cnrjiiw indiyiduni
askiug what we should sco-it Wo w'onf to
the edgo of tho world and looked over.
That the earth was a Hat surfaco on which
the sky rested, was tho belief entertained
by the founders of nil our great religious
systems. Even, liberal Protestant theo
logians stigmatized tho Oopornioau the
ory as being “built on fallible phono-*
mcun nnd advanced by many arbitrary
assumptions against evident testimonies
of Scripture.” 'Nowtolt finally placet!
his intellectual crowbar beneath these
ancient notions, and heaved them into
irretrievable riiih. Then it was that
penetrating minds, seeing the nature of
ihe.clmugo wrought by tho new luffrou-
omy in ottr conceptions of thi univi rao,
nlso discovered the difficulty, if not the
impossibility, of accepting literally flip
Mosaic account of Creation. They did
not reject it, hut they assigned to it a
meaniug entirely new. Dr. Samuel Clark,
who Was tho personal friend of Newton-
and-’a supporter of ids theory,’threw But
tho idea that “possibly tho six days of
creation might lie a typical representa
tion of greater periods.” Chirk's con
temporary, Dr. Thomas Burnet,. wrote
with decision in tho same at rain. The
Sabbat!) being regarded as q shadow or
typo of that heavenly repeat) which the
righteous will enjoy when this world 1ms
passed away, “so these six days of crea
tion lire so many periods or millenniums
for which the world and tlio toilr. and
labors of our present state tiro destined
to endure.” Tho Mosaic account was
thus reduced to a poetic myth—a view
which afterward found expression in tho
vast reveries of Hugh Miller. But if
this symbolic interpretation, which is
now generally accepted, be tho truo one,
what becomes of the Sabbath day? 1 It,
is absolutely without ooclooiastioul mean
ing and tho man who was executed for
gathering sticks on that day must bo
regarded ns the victim of a rude legal
rendering of a religious epic. There are
many minor offshoots of discussion lrom
the great central controversy Bishop
Horsely lias dcllnod a day “qs consisting
of one evening and one morning, or, ns
tho Hebrew words literally import, of
the decay of light aud the return of it, ”
But what then, it was asked, becomes of
tho Sabbath in tho Arctic regions, where
light takes six months to "decay” and as
long to “return ?” j}i Terences of longi
tude, moreover,- render tho observances
of the Sabbath at the nnmo hours im
possible. To some people such questions
might appear trifling; toothers they wore
of tho greatest import. Whether the
Sabbath should stretch from sunset to
sunset, or from midnight to midnight,
was also a subject of much discussion.
Voices, moreover, were heard refusing to
acknowledge tho propriety of the change
from Saturday to Sunday, and tho doc
trine of Seventh Day observance was
afterward represented by a sect. The
earth’s splioricity nnd rotation, which
had at first been received with such af
fright, camo eventually to the nid of those
afflicted with qualms nnd difficulties re
garding tho respective claims of Satur
day and Sunday. Tim sun nppnrenlly
moves from east to west. Suppose, thou,
wo start on a voyage round the world ill
a westerly direction. In doing so we
sail away, us it wore, from the sun, which
follows and periodically overtakes us,
reaching tho meridian of our ship each
succeeding day somewhat - later than if
we stood still. For every fifteen degrees
of longitude traversed by tho vessel tho
sun will tie exactly an hour late; and,
after the ship lias traversed twenty-four
times fifteen degrees, or <160 degrees—
tlint is to say, the entire circle of tho
earth—the sun will be exactly a day be
hind. Hero, then, is the expedient
suggested by Dr. Wallis, F. R. 8.,
Havilinn Professor of Gcomentry in the
University of Oxford, to quiet tho minds
of those in doubt regarding Saturday
observance. Ho rocoommeuds them to
make a voyage around the world, ns Sir
Francis Drake did, "going out of Un-
Atlantic Ocean westward by the Straits
of Magellan to tlie East Indies, and then
from the east, returning by tho Capo of
Good Hope homeward, and lot them
keep tlioir Saturday Sabbath all the way.
When they come home to England they
will find their Saturday to fall upon our
Sunday, and they may. henceforth eon-
ffliue to observe their Saturday Sabbath
on the same day with us.”
A On tCAvt i syndicate puiohatcd, one
year ago, from the Texas Logisl dure,
8.000,000 noroS .of laud lor $1,1)09,OJO,
Him Istui Inis nob- Vail rOld lo a L m-
Jbn syutiioato fot 910,090,01)0
Aluxandku Dorms, tho Nuw Orleans
sculptor, who lias furnished several
statnes of General Loo, General .1 olfn-
slon and oilier Southern warriors, lins
sent North,-at Mr. -Corcoran's request, u
model for the monument to the poet
Payne.
It m said that some of the foinnle op
eratives obtained from England to work
in tjio new cotton faotory nt Halifax,
N. $., aro in the habit of taking their
infant children to liquor sliopH and stu
pefying them with raw spirits prepara
tory to leaving for their work.
Mil. H. A, W. Tsiidk, of Colorado,
who will bo rotnembere l ns a United
States Senator during a few days of the
last session, is reported to oonh iiljilate
the building of a- hotel in Douver. It
will be the finest hostelry in tlm world,
and, exclusive of tho furnishing, will cost
more than 81,000,000.
We.ndfi. Pbii.i.ivs' wife has been an
invalid for over thirty years, aud during
all this tirno tho groat orator lias been
untiring in 1-iis attention to liar, "N
one tint you call know wliut it lias lieei
to care for her," was remarked to bin
rooontly, “Alii No one but mo knot’ s
iiow good she is,” was Ids hoavUtoiuc
answer.
—A man who was kept iu the look-up
over night for hissing a performance nt
the theater in Wheeling, W. Va., was
examined next morning by tho Police
Justice. One of the witnesses said that
other persons in the audience bud sp
plauded the same performer. ‘‘Did tin
officer nrrest them?" asked the Judge
“No, sir.” "Did not the applause main-
more noise than the his .iug?” "Y.-\ 1
suppose it did.” “Well, I will discharge
the prisoner. The right to applaud irn
. . . . . ... ... , , ,, plies the right to hiss. You may go,
have originated a silk association, bought
Two imp irtant now linos of nubia s
aro nmv being surveyed iu 1-bst Tennes
see, Duo is to oxtond from Sp u ta, ovi r
the Cumberland Mountains, to the Cin
cinnati Southern Railway, lieu'. 1 It ig’iy,
and tho other is to extiml from thu Cin
cinnati SoUtnoru, near Hunbright, to
Kuoxvillo.
Youn’O Alexander Hilvliii, who has
been performing with Margaret M itlicr,
will return to Italy soon, to bo oxntiiiuo l
for tlio military .sarviou, all young men
in that country being ooltipellcd to serve
threo yeprs iu the army, lie will prol)
ubly lio oxeusud on account of tho weak
ness of hit eyes, but it is not probable
that ho will roturn to the Unit.-d States.
A yoUNii laity wlio entered a enliven I
iu Montreal nb iut four years ago, is mnv
tired of her seclusion from the worl I,
and in failing health, liar relatives have
applied for her release, but the Bishop
replies that they have no right to inter
fere. Tho young Indy is <lu-erred from
acting herself through fear of exaom
munication, and the tami y are talking
of resorting to a writ of luihoat corpus.
Mn. Coaiik, the architect of the On pi
tol at Washington, suggests to Gover
nor Foster that the Ohio statue of Mr.
Garfield, to lie planed in Statuary Hall
at tlio Capitol, shall correspond m size
with the ollu-r statues there. Ho calls
attention to tho general condemnation
that the statue of Ethan Allen lias pro
voked on account of its colossal size,
whioli dwarfs the surrounding statues.
Complaint is mado that thero Ims
bocu very littlo social gayety.in the
American circlo in i’aris this year, Mrs,
Mackoy being tit Mentone recuperating
her health. Ou tho other hand, strange
aa it may seem, a correspondent, wilt
ing from Alexandria, says that tlio town
lias boon very gsy, that thero is an ex
cellent club there, and very agreeable
society, with an abundance of dinner
parties and dances.
Tan Bankrupt Cq-opcr»tivo Drees As-
iiceiulion, of New York, which went into
a receiver’s bauds about three mouths
ago, appears to have been more fortu
nate than tlio average of such concerns
in that State. A dividend of 60 per cent,
has been declared to tlio creditors and
they are en ured by tlio receiver that
there .is more to follow. Nothing lias
been p«id to lawyers and no fees re
tained by the receiver.
Tub rcprcseiiUitives "f the !t«-rr i
in Memphis, Tulin., have cun e
xcitement' smong ’ tlio C.thoic
fencing off one-half of Calvary C meter.v,
It is claimed that a part of the piuvlitisi
money for tho land has been duo sinci
I860, which the managers of tlio estate
have been tinpblo to collect. In the p r
I tion fenced oil iio fho remains of twenty
| me Catholic priests, and many otheri
whose’relatives are prominent people oi
Memphis
DoMEr.no servants are accustomed to
•ubmit to more rigid control than people !
in other kinds i.f employment; lmt it is
rarely that the lie ul of tlio household
-tretches Kjs authority to I ir ; s loovder
<rhnt a ic vant shall or shall not do
when out of doors. Sir John Cowell,
the nnst r of the (> icon's l-niisohold at
Windsor, has forbidden even those ser
vants who are living'at their own homes
to visit a tin ntro, a inii-io ball, or any
other public place.
CiiU’ut.AUs have boon received nt the
p.illeo headquarters iu tlio pr.nuip I
ciliov of tho United States off' l ing a re
ward of £1.090 for tins uppreheusion of
my of the persons oonearuod iu tho nt-
t nipt to blow tip tho Government offices
eid tho yV/.iei oilin', Tlio circular
p omir.es (Do recommendation of Her
Majesty s most gra-dmis pardon, in ml-
liliou to the payment of 111-'reward, to
my accompli,: ' giving information, who
wet not tho aotnid perpetrator of oitle r
outrage,
A mi,i, pnssud second rea ling in the
California legislature which provided
substance that the Attorney General
might, on application of any citizen of
the State., bring mi action for divorce in
anv ease where the par ies had b-on
separated f r four years. Before tlio hill
oaiue up for final pasiogo u loiter roach-
d tho Speaker from tho wife of a legis
lator showing that tho proposed law was
merely a ilovioo to secure for this legis
lator a dooreo which tho courts refused
to grant Tlio letter proved to be a
convincing iirgiim-ni’, and thu bill failed,
AaoonniNO to thu In urancr. Chronictr,
the lire losses iu the U -iled 8-.it s dur
ing thu year 1HS2, worn 046,000.001).
This sum, if siibstrnctcd from the profits
of the yoir, would mnk - a very percep
tible decrease, and tlio wonder is that
tiio reducing of s> largi an iiiin'iut o!
capital to adivi iv nit, more scrioiuly
folt. There are whole States that could
havo b ion blotted out of cxistuuoo with
loss pecuniary ion Hum that caused in
one year by flro. The taxable value of
property, real aud p nsoiial, in uvon so
old a .State as Arkansas, is less than lust
yoiir’B loss by fire.
A ni'MAUKAiir,K invention is described
Ivy the lil'Ctrwnl Review. It is a device
for photographing in a telephone ex
change all persons iming tho telephones
on wires i manuring therefrom. The
photograph appears on a ribbon which
rims under tlio eye of tlio operator. If
tlio person using the instrument is not u
subscriber, tlio fact is nt once apparent,
nnd tlie person iu whoso office the tel
ephone is located is charged it ilxod hiiiii
for allowing bis instrument to bo tisod
by one not entitled to use it. Each rib
bon will bold two hundred aud fifty
photographs, mid when full will bo filed
away. 11 is claimed that the telephone
service can be much improved if tlio ir e
of tlie instrument is restricted to sub
scribers only, as is likely to bu tlio case
if the device is attached.
A lVIily Judge,
Readers of Sli vdierqware have always on-
joyeil tie- wit of "I 'or! in, "in the .1 /riv/ittnl
hi | Vn/ec, by which shesnvi il "Antonio”
from the knife of "HI i.y lock. ” The pretend
ed judge affirmed tlio right of ‘'l-liiy 1-
In Ida pound of H.-ali, but added, hliunld a
drop of blood bo shed iu taking it, Ms
life would be forfeited, A California
judge has shown equal wit,
A hard charnetor, well-known as it thief,
was indicted for out .ring a miner’s hint,
mid stoidiug a bug ol gold dust. Hie
theft was proved, lie had born seen to
It a slit in tlm tent and reach iu mid
take tin- ha-'. A bright, thought or: ured
the counsel f- w file defence.
" How far did ho got wli m lie took tho
dust?” , , , .
About half-way in, ns ho rom-hed
over,” said the witness.
May it please your honor," said tlie
shrewd lawyer, " f ahull demand the
acquittal of iny client. # The indictment
is rqit sustained. Ho did not enter tile
tout. Can a man enter a house when
ace-half of his body is in, and tie-other
half out?
The jury mid judge wore equal ’o the
emergency. The verdict of the jury
was, “•Guilty uh lo oun-lialf of his body,
and not guilty as to the otic r half. _ Lho
jentouco of the judge was, " luipllfloii-
mont for tho guilty part, of two years.
Tlie prisoner may leave the other part
behind, or take it with him.” The sharp
lawyer was outwitted.
PITH ATI) POUT.
Tub first lady in tho land’’ is
" Mother."
Aw unpaid note often rises up in judg
ment.
Tun railroad flagman does a flourish
ing business.
“Ib blood will tell, a mosquito should
bo confessing nearly all the time.
Goliath was tho first person who
wore a bung on liis forehead.
Tub retired prize-fighter generally
keeps a bar, tdtowipg thu survival of the
fittest,
When yon say Hint a girl’n hair is
block ns coal, it is just ns well to specify
that you do not mean a rod-hot coal.
Manitoba ought either to como into
tile Union and shut thb door behind
her or slay out and keep hor blizzards
to herself.
“ Ti' I punish you," said a mamma to
her little girl, “ you don’t suppose I do
so fqr my plensuro, do yon?" “Thon
whoso pleasure is it for, doar mamma?”
“ Euobnib, Eugenie, will you still in
sist on weariug the hair of another wom
an upon your head ? ” " Alphouso, Al-
phonso, do yon still insist upon wearing
(lie skin of another onlf upon your feet?"
A riNANCiAi.ly-mlnnei> youth got up
tlio following vurso in a Detroit Sunday-
school ;
Should .11 lh« hash, of Kngl.nd UrMlr,
Should KnuUud’a tank b® auiMhad,
l)i JtiK in your olmrkH to Zion’s bank,
And you will got thorn cudied.
Loud Holland told of a man remark
able for aiiHcnco of mind, who, dining
onoo nt some sort of shabby repast, fan-
ciod himself iu his own house aud began
to apologize for tho wrotcliodnoss of tho
dinner,
A Gat,vnstow widow is about to marry
her fifth husband. Her pastor rebuked
hor for contemplating matrimony so
soon again. " Well, I just want you to
understand, if tlio Irnrd keeps on taking
them I will, too," was the spirited reply.
—f/a/veetou JVewn.
Tun boast of a newspaper giving tho
fullest account of a lute revolting specta
cle reminds us of what a campaign
speaker admitted of a political opponent:
" He can dive deeper, stay under longer,
and come up nastier than any man I ever
heard of,iVno York Mail.
Tub Milwaukee Sun s)ieaks of a por-
Hon “who turned as pale as the ace of
spades.” Wo always supposed tbo ace
of spiuies wuh red, and was hard to dis
tinguish from the jack of—of—diamonds,
ns we beliovo that card is culled whore
the figure wears n crown.—Nonietown
Herald,
“You did wrong to shoot that man’s
dog. You Might liavo pushed him off
with tlie butt of your gun,” snid tlio
Galveston Recorder to a man wlio was
charged with shooting a neighbor’s dog.
“I would have done that,” replied tlie
prisoner, “if tlio dog had come at mo
fail first, but ho camo at mo with liis
biting end."
It 1ms become customary in Galveston
to refer all commercial troubles to tlio
Cotton Exchange. A few days ago a
prominent merchant slipped up on a bn-
nuiia-peel with tlie usual results. Ho
sat up on flic wet pavement, nnd, look
ing at tho slippery peel, said : " If I
know what hyena put Hint peel thero I’d
linvo him up before the Cotton Exchange
for impairing my standing on the
street. ”—(ialvcstQii Ncwh.
A denial mistake : New beauty (un
versed ns yet In tlie mysteries of high
lift,)—“ Wlin’s flint wonder I ul old gen
tleman?" Tho Captain—“ Sir Digby do
Rigby, 11 Hampshire Baronet, one of thu
oldest in England ; James tlie First’s
creation, you know.” Now beauty (de
termined to lie surprised nt nothing)—
o Indeed ! How well preserved lie is ! I
shouldn’t havo thought him more tlum
70 or 80."
Hhe was a big, buxom lass, and when
her small beau cnlled one evening she
said: “ Good evening, Lilv.” “I’m no
lily,” he replied, surprised nt tlio idea ;
" you’re tlio lUy ; men aro novor lilies.”
“'Yes, sometimes thoy are, and you es
pecially are a lily. “How’s that?”
“ Lilliputian.” He then looked ns if he
wished he were an elophnnt.”
Confections from Rags.
The manufacture of glucose from rags,
a novel industry, carried on in Germany,
is regarded with much disfavor, and it is
understood that tlio German Govern
ment will be likely to interfere with the
business. The glucose is said to bo
chemically identified with grape sugar.
Tlio process, which is represented to lie
very cheap, is as follows : Old linen
rags, which are composed of hard vege
table fibers, are convi rted into dextrin
by the application of sulphuric acid, and
the product thus obtained is then washed
with milk of lime. Next it is treated
with a stronger solution of tjie sulphuric
acid than tlmt first used, when the ma
terial is immediately transformed and
crystallized into a glucose, from which
appetizing jellies and tempting confec
tions can be made.
“ Don't talk to inn no ?
I would hare you to know
Tho pioasiiro’H boon mine all through Ilf®
To lxj my own boat)—
But then you, of courM,
Won't mention this fact to my wife.
—Yonkcru .Stulrnman.
Sunday a little girl camo home from
church and failed to repent the text to
her mother as customary. The good
mother cast, her deep, expressive eyes
reproachfully to her regretful child,
“llow could I, mamma, remember such
a long text, when every lady in tho con
gregation had on a bran’ new dress that
was too sweet for anything ? Oh, mam
ma, you’d ought to havo been to
church !” And all thoughts of tlio text
were forgotten as she described what sho
saw to her loving mother.
—Chauncey Warner, of Cambridge,
Vt., is to establish a free hospital in Si.
Albans, and will purchase for its use a
tino house and grounds costing $30,000.
The same gentleman recently founded
the Warner Home for Little Wanderers
in St. Albans, and provided an endow
ment fund of #25,000 for its support.
Mr, ORakferty is sitting in his
room with his head tied up and liis arm
in n sling, when a little boy Hticlis liis
head in and asks, “ Mo feytnor sint me
to inquire how yer eye was coming on
this morning.” “ Tell yer feyther to at-
tind a ward meeting himself, and call
the Cl'.wirman a liar, and he will foind it
all out widout (iskiaV’-. . •>.-