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The Squirrel Prob'.em. “A squirrel is lip a tree and a man on the ground with a gun is trjing to shoot it; but the squirrel len-ists in keeping on the opposite side of tire tree from the man. TLe man walks clear around the tree to the place of starting, the squirrel coing about in the same direction and keeping the tree all the time between itself and the man. Now the pri b!em is, 'Hw the man been around the squirrel?’ He has been around the tree with the squirrel on it, but lias lie been around the squirrel?” Toe Lores'* Invited answers to this problem, and received twenty-seven, of which fifteen say yes, the man does go around the squir rel, and twelve say no, he does not. A few have sent us their reasons, and two send figures demonstrating the problem. The following answers are printed: 1. Of course the man goes around the squirrel. He goes around the tree and everything on it. 2 Should the squirrel have the start I am of the opinion that the man goes around it. 3. Not by a good deal does the hun ter walk around the squirrel. 4. The man does not go around the squirrel. Might as well claim that— by having a horse attached at A and and another at B each describing the same circle, keeping at opposite sides of circle—the horse at A would at every time going around the ring go around the inside half <f B and that B returned the compliment (A X )B to A In the same manner simple be cause the outside of one descrioed a larger circle than the inside of the other. In other word* a man or horse in describing any circle gees around one half of himself. 6. The man goes around the squir rel. It is just like a wheel within a wheel. 6. The man don’t go around the squirrel. I have tried it and had I got around the squirrel I would have shot it. 7. If there was no tree there and the squirrel was ruuning around in a circle on the ground and the man was going in a larger circle I should say the man went around the squirrel. But when you put a tree there it is different. The man does not go around the squirrel on the tree. 8. The man doesn’t go around the squirrel any more than the squirrel goes around the man. 0. Of course the man doesn’t go around the squirrel. If I am standing on the nigh side of a horse and start to walk round him, and the horse keeps turning as I go, I am on the nigh side of him all the time, am I not? And I don’t go around him if I am on the nigh side all the time, do I ? The case is precisely similar to this of the squirrel on a tree. From 'Frisco to Buffalo the Lauth Goes Round. Tli’ Button Dodge. lie driftrd into Phil McGovern’s saloon the oilier evening, wiped his forehead, ft it around in his pocket, ai d -aid with a pleasant smile : “Well, as it seem?, I have just one 10-ceut piece left to-day, and I’ll take a drink.” When the fiur fingers of Antioch’s nerve-fangler had been se creted in liis remotest recesses the consumer fumbled among his keys, and laid something on tbe counter. As he did so he started and said, with a look of amazement: “Great S ott 1 jmt look at that!” “I see it,” said the barkeeper, scornfully regard ng tbe alleged dime. “It’s a suspender but ton. What of it?” “Well, I didn’t look at it before. I just felt in my pocket, and I’m blamtd if it didn’t fool me. Ahem. I suppose you’ll have to put this drink on ice until to morrow, I’ll drop in and fix it.” “Oh! of course you will. Hire take this,” and the cocktail retailer handed over a needle and llmad. “What’s that for?” “Why, for you to sew on that button right now; otherwise you might make a mistake again this evening somew’here else. Just sew her on strong.” But the party with the button was very much insulted, and went out swearing that they didn’t know how to treat one of the most prominent citizens. “Mean,” she cried, "My husband is the meanest wretch in the world. He won’t give me the least excune for complaining.” An exchange prints an able article on “Hints on Plow to Go to Sleep.” It is the most convincing article we ever read on the subject. We were fast asleep before we get half through it. An Albany paper tells of a woman in that city who woke her husband during a storm, the other night, and said: "I do wish you would stop snoring, for I want to hear the thunder.” “Ah! my friend,” said a clergyman to a parishioner, who was the hubband of a termagant and who made applica tion for a divorce “we should be yield ing and forgiving, There are no divorces in heaven.” “That’s the reason,” said the sufferer, “why I am so anxious to get a divorce here.” A Buffalo paper tells of a lover who began to propose to his girl just as his horse started to run with the sleigh Being determined to have it over, he got the question out at the moment the sleigh struck the mile post. The girl was thrown high into the air, but as she came down she uttered a firm “Yes, Chailie,” and then fainted. harrowing groan fro tn the j atb’Ht sud denly put them all to flight, except M iesNightiuga'e, who turning cilmly round called to them, “C mie back ! shame ou you as Cbrisdiane! shame on you as women ! ’ They returned holding each other’s trembling bauds and some of them almost ready 1o faiut. But they got oyer their ner vous Wf atmeis as theit novitiate ad vanced, and did an amount of good that yet lives in the memory of many a man rescued from death and p»id by their gentle ministration. M ss Nightingale’s work was duly appreciated. At a large dinner-party given by Lord S:ratford, when peace had been made, to the superior officers of the army, and navy, Miss Nightin gale was also among the guests. W uen the la lies had w ithdrawn, the ambas sador made a speech recording the services rendertd by those present, aud gracefully alluding to the part played by her. Where I was sitting fl ittering remarks were made on the conduct of those whom Loid Stratford had so warmly praised. It was at last proposed that everyone should write on a slip of paper the name which ap peared to him m' et likely to descend to posterity with renown. The names were written and given to the proposer of this benevolent form of ostracism. The papers were opened and read; even one of them contained the name of M.ss Nightingale. Au enthusias tic cheer was raised, in which the two commanders-in chief, Sir Wil liam Codrington, of the army, and Lord Lyons of the navy, were among the most clamorous in their applause, Lord Stratford lending the hurrah. A Turtle-dove Widowhood. Florence Nightingale’s ness. Firm- A New Society. A “Society for Physical Research” has been started under the presidency of Mr. Henry Sidgwick. Several men of note who have leanings in the di rection of spiritualism, but who have hitherto avoided declaring themselve3 so openly, are connected with it. Mr. A. J. Balfour, M. P., Professor Balfour Stewart, Mr. R. H. Hutton, Hon. Roden Noel, Mr. F. Myers, Dr Lockhart Robertson, and others. It makes one rub one’s eyes to find society founded in 1882 gravely an nouncing a “Committee on Appari tions, Haunted Houses,” etc., presided over by Mr. Hensleigh Wedgwood. It is a pity that the Cock Lane ghost is extinct. There is a committee on “Thought Reading,” headed by Pro fessor Barrett. By the way, we may mention that Mr. Stuart Cumberland gave a singu larly successful exposure of “thought reading” before a distinguished audi ence the other evening. He easily discovered an object hid by M nsignor Capel in Mr. Cumberland’s abscence from the room. Iu a like manner, but with even greater facility, a pin stuck in a vest of a spiritualist doctor by the secretary of the “Society for Psjehical Research” was found by Air. Cumberland. Professor Croom Robertson and Professor Ray Lankes- ter stated that where Mr. Bishop had failed Mr. Cumberland bad succeeded, id that he was by far the greatest ex tent of the profession that had yet kjvard— the special merit of his Lits lying iu the fact tHht he |^en«ions, simply claiming natural perceution. There were nine hundred wounded who were at once sent to tbe hospital at Scutari. Miss Nightingale had ar rived there with her bevy of lady nurses. Her first act showed her won derful energy and determination. The steamers laden with the wounded had cast auchor at Constantinople. There were not yet any mattresses or bed clothes on the camp beds in the hos pital, and the latter were not nearly sufficient in number for the wounded coming. Miss Nightingale went to the Quartermaster Sergeant in charge of the stores, and asked him for the stores w’hlch she required. He told her there was everything she could desire in the magsziues, but that she must get the Inspector General of Hospitals to write an official letter to the Quartermaster General, who would send him an authority to draw the stores, and that sho might then receive them on showing that author ity. Miss Nightingale asked how longthis would take. Ou being toldtliat three days would be the shortesftime necessary for the correspondence, she answered that nine hundred wounded officers and men would be In the hos pital iu three hours, and that she must have what they required Imme diately. She then went to the maga zines, and telling the sergeant of the guard there who she was, asked him if he could take au order from her. He said he would, aud site ordered him to diive in the door. This was done, and the wounded were provided for in time. Her firmness at surgical operations was something marvelous ; her appre ciation of her mission was grand. Sue stood one day with spirits, instruments and lint in hand, during the perform ing of aLightful amputation. Half a d( zen young lady nurses wtre behind liev, holding basins, towels aud other t.hinu?fl-the surgeous mig.it want. A The Humorous Aid3 Digestion. Compromise. A man was once asked how he and his wife got along with so little fric tion iu the family machinery. “Well,” said he, “when we were first married we both wanted our own way. I want ed to sleep on linen sheets, my wife preferred cotton, and w# couldn’t agree. Finally we talked the matter over, and came to the conclusion that it was unchristian to live in constant bickering; so we compromised on linen, aud have got along all right ever since.” Where an Appeal Didn’t Lie Montreal,some y ears ago, in the days of the Oid Court House, to feast his eyes upon which Nelson’s statue oppo site turned his back upon the blue waters of the St. Lawrence, had a very matter-cf-fact magistrate who dis pensed justice in the base cent of the temple of Themis. Oue fine day his H mor had just given judgment in a suit where both plaintiff and defend ant were women, and the defend ^rt, who had been ordered to pay the dtbt, amounting to about $2.75, with costs, happened to be a woman of deep con victions as to the justice of her case, so, wrapping her shawl closely around her and lifting one bony arm tragi cally, she exclaimed solemuly: “Your H mor, there’s a court above to which I will appeal”— “There is no appeal to the Court up stairs, my good woman, except in eases involving sums of $40 or over. Call the next case !” was the brisk re ply of the deeply unimpressed magis trate, and the defendant was hustled out of the Court before she could ex plain. I tell you, gentlemen, that dog of mine is an intelligent critter.” “Pov feibly,” muttered Fogg; “but you wouldn’t think it, judging from the company he keeps.” An Irishman on board a vessel, when she was on the point of founder ing, being desired to come on deck as she was going down, replied that he had no wish to go on deck to see him self drowned. “Green, let me Introduce you to my friend Brown.” Green—“How are you, Brown?” Brown—“it’s my color and I can’t help it? How are you, Green?” Green didn’t like the joke, evidently,, for he changed color. An English contemporary tells the story of the beadle who did not like u sermon because lie said, “It was rather ower plain and simple forme. I like that sermon best that jumbles the ioodgment and confoond the sense.” He came home the other night in the drizzling rain, soaked inside as well as out. "What excuse have you to offer,” said his bolter half, “for coming huue in such a beery condi tion ? ’ “None, my dear, ’cept ’i,va.3 a very muggy day. • The electric light will affect the colors of clotIih as well as paintings in ihe same way, but not so quickly, as sunlight. The grief of the Princess of Bora at tbe loss of her husband is sfill remem bered throughout Paris. Within her doors draped iu black, in tire Parisian mourning emblazoned with ciphers, there reigned the terrible despair of a devout .Spanish woman. The Princvss cut off her hair, and secluded herselt from every one. In her mourning robes, with her youthful head shorn of its locks, she had the appearance of a nun, which made her hotel resemble a convent, blie passed her days be fore the jiortratt of her husband, and dined alone in the large dining-room, where every evening the table was spread fi r two. Tbe cane and tbe hat of tbe Prince remained in the ante room in their accustomed places, as if the master, although he had left home forever, had just come in. ILs pres ence being thus recalled, rendered the despair ot the poor wiie more intense, and the void of his absence even greater. But of all that round of calls, balls, receptions and concerts where they had met and loved, and which fet, as it were, their happiness in a fashions- ule society frame, the retained only one friend, the Baiouess Auceliu, a drawing room prima-donna, who was indebted to her beautiful voice for having remained the intimate friend of the Princess, whose great inconsola ble and noisy grief made all conversa lion jar upon her mood, but who loved to hear singing around her, as it helped her to give vent to tears. Two years passed thus, and the widovy was still sorrowful, still austere. Her hair, however, was allowed to mow, rippling over the head with re bellious life in luxuriant cutis and waves. Her mourning was thus lightened and made more cheerful, aud seems now to be worn only as a caprice of fashion. It was ai this period that tne nephew of Mme. An- celin, meeting the Princess at his auut’s house, fell desperately in love and began to dream of marrying her. At the first word erf love he ventured to address to her, the widow became indignant. To her the Prince still lived, and this effer seemed an insult tempting her to be unfaithful. For some time the did not see her friend, the Baroness. The young man went away and tried to forget, but soon re turned, and show ed so much love and despair that Mine. Ancelin took pity on him aud resolved to overcome the scruples of the Princess. But how could she persuade a woman with so peculiar a nature, who never reasons, and who was led only by impulse and enthusiasm. She believed that a passion so exclu sive must necessarily be j-alous, and tried to obtain some old letters of the Prince. This was not very difficult, M. de Bora having written many be fore his marriage, and scattered his »crawls throughout a multitude of little boxes and locked drawers, w hich, however, were so well hidden one from the other, that each might boast of being the sole possessor of the perfumed coat-of-armsof the great lord. In order to bring a few sheets of tom# common-place romance in letters without date to show to the wi low, Mme. Ancelin had the courage to pre sent herself again at the hotel which was like a tomb of the dead, a silent, flower-decked tomb, were all day long wept a living statue. It was not grief, but the falling of her idol that now became her pain. Poor little Princess! Her years of hap piness, aud period of widowhood alike rolled down an l vanished into the same abyss of scorn and auger. No thing remained but an intense desire to avenge herself. The portrait was banished from her room. The second plate at table by which she tried to delude hor fancy that she was not alone was now removed from before the empty, sacredly guarded seat; and iu the crowded ante-room which was henceforth to be opened to callers and passers to and fro, the hat aud cane that hail been there so long were no longer to be seen. There were fetes at the hotel de Bora now, balls and suppers. As a changeful sky skakes off the night that lingered long, the Princess emerged in gray, lilac, pink and blue, recovering all former brill iancy. Then oue evening, while walking in her small conservatory, the said to Mme. Anc liu’s nephew, who had been following her about like a gloomy shadow since h*r return to tbe sunlight: ‘ Now 1 will bo your wife whenever you wish.” Bhe would have liked to have tbe ceremony per formed that.vej.y moment iu the con servatory. They wero man led very soon after aud were happy, she through a kind of rage, and he perplexed and a-ton- ished at her suddea passion, but on* joying his happiness without seeking to analyse it too closely. Hi society the marriage v»s much talked about. Tbe Baroness Ancelin, remembering similar phrases in her romances, has ready a charming little speech upon the subject: “ Do you seethe Piiucess! People thought she was lamenting, whereas her lamenting was cooing.” Bix months elapsed. The newly- matried couple were living in the country, in a chateau in thesubuib3 of Paris, where the friend made them a visit. Seeing them quietly maui- fi sting their happiness as they walked among the smooth lawn®, and silent paths, the charming Baroness, who was never far-righted, having her eyes open only to the present moment, suddenly said to them: “Tt was I who made you so happy. Well, I do not regret my falsehood.” The Princess gave a sudden start* “What do you say? What fals^ hood ?’’ “Yes, dear, I can tell you every thing now. The poor Prince was not so black as I painted him. Tbos# famous letters were dated five years buck. You were not married then.” “Is this what you have done?” said the Princess, looking at her hus band and her friend with an expres sion of madness in her eyes. The dead, fugotten Prince, whose name she no longer bore, wholly resumed his former place in her affection®, aa hrr husband plainly saw by a shrink ing motion as bhe drew back from him. All was over between them without a word of explanation. The Princess shut herself up at home aud in an agony that lasted long she gave way fo all the remorse that tortured her. The unhappy woman had married again, not for love, but out of revenge, nnd finding that the Prince was not unfaithful she felt guilty towards him and ashamed of herself. With what pity and sorrow she recalled his mem ory that had been so rudely banished, and now rttumed with the same power! The poor Inver held himself aloof, knowing well that be was nothing to her; her former passion returning with such strength had killed what she felt for him as by one blow. At the last moment, as Mme. Ance lin was weeping near her, being over come with remorse, although hardly understanding her fault, the Princess leaned over towards the thoughtless creature, who had fluttered like a but ter fly across ber straight aud serious path, aud said in a voice too feeble for tbe complaint to rtsemb’e a reproach, “You see I am not oooing. I am dy ing.” And it was true. Elephants and Their Teeth. Empress, the female elephant at the Zoological Garden, St. Louis, has just passed through one of the in (Steeling changes looked for iu her species ia about her age, in th£ shedding of hei back, or, as they are called, “milk” teeth Recently, Empress appeared a little dull and seemed to have lost her appitite. S cretary Kalb had her watched closely, but could not deter mine what was the matter, until there appeared the crowns of several teeth. These crowns were about three inches long and one-half wide and an inch thick, and made the cause of her indis position clejr. An examination of her mouth corroborated the same thing, the “milkers” having disap peared. Within an hour Empress began to regain her wonted good htalth and soon made known that she was longing for something to eat. This Joss of her early molars is said to occur at the age of ten years. English Humor. The London Spectator says that “the humor of the United States, if closely examined, will be fi und to depend in a great measure ou the ascendency which the principle of utility has gained over the imaginations of a rather imaginative people.” The humor of England, if closely exam ined, will be found just about ready to drop over the picket fence into the arena, but never quite making con nections. If we scan the English lit- erary horizon we will find the humor- is up a tall tree, depending from a sharp knot thereof by the slack of his overalls. He is just out of sight at the time you look in that direction. He alwiys has a man working in liis place, however. The man who works in his place is just paring down tl| half sole and newly pegging that tins recently beet, sent In foreman for repairs. lown tif g » jof n by t(