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Jim’s Identification wlih a Mule.
po’use.
ye* yet.
well as
school.
Old Ned’s son returned from college
the other day. The old man had
looked forward to the event, and had
arranged a dinner, to which he invit-
ed a large number of acquaintances.
The young man was modest, and, to
the great humiliation of his father,
made no attempt to display his learn
ing. Tne old man waited several
days, and when at Its' he saw no evi
dence cf his son’s education, ho ap-
proacl e 1 him and said :
“ Jim, it do seem ter me dat yer’s
putting yer edycation ter a mighty
I ain’t heard a big word from
I can un’erstan’ yer gist as
I did ’fore yer went ter dat
El a man’s edycated I wants
him to talk so as I can’t un’erstan’
him. Me an’ yer mudder hab been
talkin’ ’bout dis matter, an’ we’ee
grieved way down in the flesh. Jim,
W'hat’s de big word for grasshopper?”
“ Orthopterous insect of the genus
gryllus, according to Webster,” re
plied the young man.
“ But de tuther day when dem folks
was heah yer spoke ob a grasshopper
jest de same as de iguorestest nigger
in de couutry an’ brought sh tine
down on de heads of yer mudder and
myself. What’s de big word for
goat?”
“ Mammiferous quadruped of the
genus capra,” answered the young
man.
“But why didn’t yer say so, ’stead
of sayin’ goat like a nigger, an’ bring-
in’ de tingle ob embarrassment ter yer
fader’s face? What did I gin yer dat
schoolin’ fur—ter t«lk like a unedyea-
ted son ob apo’ whiteman? Tuink
dat I’se gwine ter keep yer heah in
idleness yer kin reflect cree ie on de
family? Jim, what is de big words
for blamed fool?”
, “ I don’t kno w, sir.”
“Yerdoan’? Den yer ain’t’q mint
ed wid yersef. Yer doan’ recognize
whar yer stands. Go out dar in de
fields wid a mule an’ identify your
self.”
f
The Laundries of the Seine,
Women kneel in the boals on the
banks of the Heine, pounding their
linen with the wooden battoln, scrub
bing it with a stiff brush on a ridged
board, while the/ sing as merrily as
larns, and reply to the banter of the
passing bargee and canotitr. They
turn the handle of the wringing
machines and do all the hard labor
while the men are busy ironing. They
man in the blue cotton trousers and
snowy white shirt, with the scarlet
girdle round his waist, can iron as well
as any Chinaman. He can boast of
having among his colleagues men who
can gofler a frill, or “bring up” the
leftly to
which
in who
*in his
billiard
he passes over the hot
he eomes to the front, the
Sr the wristbauds. He has learn-
rudiments of his art when, a
soldier in barracks, he was compelled
to do his own washing and ironing,
and he works by the piece, earning
his living, and glowering angrily
when his profits are menaced by the
threat of introducing the mangle, as
yet almost unknown on this side of the
Channel. Tne blanehi^eur goes into
Paris on the Monday morning with
the clean linen, and the ironers, *ho
have been working overtime on the
Sunday and on the two preceding days,
take a rest . They may be feu id on the
Monday afternoon at one or other of
the concerts at Pont du Jour, enjoying
themselves as best they can with the
firm in lent ion of not resuming their
occupations until Wednesday. Some
times their employers cannot secure
their seivices until the Friday, but, as
a general rule, they prefer to wait, for
they are uugallant enough to main
tain that it Is far better and more profl-
abie to employ men than women.
Alphabetical.
The Sandwich Island alphabet has
12 letters; the Burmese, Id; the
Italian, 20; the Bengalese, 31; the
Hebrew, Syriac, Chaldee and Samari
tan, 22 each; the French, 28; the
Greek, 24 j the Latin, 25 ; the Ger
man, Dutch and English, 26 each;
Spanish, 27 ; the Arabic, 28; the Per
sian, 81; the Russian, 41; the San-
sorlpt, 60 ; the Ethlopio, 202.
An Old Irish Prophecy.
The follow’Dg letter appears in a
recent issue of the London Times :—
Sir:—I had a visit last week from
an Irish person lane lord, who, being
weary of living in daily fear for hie
life, had come to seek rest and security
in Ergland.
He tells me that the Irish people
dressed and disguised for the market
by the introduction of foreign earthy
matters. In concluding, he said that
the neglect of the laws of morality, of
the lines of true beauty, and of correct
smitary principles in matters of dress
wassufti lent to justify his short paper,
and to give him a reason for calling
the attention of the Congress to some
of the causes of continue l ill health
are very much excited by the fact among the community. That which
Htuff and nonsense—A big dinner
speeches.
that Easter is to fall next year “in our
lady’s arms” i. e., on Lady Day,
March 26th. The current tradition is
that this happened in the year of the
battle of the Boyne, and that at its
next occurrence Ireland is to be free.
He tells me further that a friend of
his “verified” the statement as to the
year 1690 by means of a mechanical
almanac. Now, a mechanical alma
nac may very well be made to show
the date of Easter for any particular
century, but a mechanism which is to
take account of the century adjust
ment of the calendar, would be al
most fcs complicated as Babbage’s cal
culating machine.
Possibly people have been misled by
trying to apply to other centuries a
mechanism adjusted to the present
century.
At all events, if superstitious people
in Ireland are encouraging them
selves by any such tradition as my
friend mentions, it is desirable that
they should be set right as to the facts
of the case.
It is quite true that Easter will fall
“in our Lady’s arms” in 1883, but the
vears in wl?ich this has previously
happened have been as follows:—Old
Htyle, 1643, 1564, 1627, 1638, 1619, 1722,
1738, 1744 New Style, 1663, 1674,
1731, 1742. The New Style was intro
duced into England in 1752, but was
used by the Roman Cathol cs from
1782. In neither style do any of the
above years correspond with events of
any singular importance in Ireland.
I may aud that the battle of the
Boyne was fought on July 9 h, 1699,
in wh j ch year Easter of Old Style fell
on April 20th, aud Easter of the New
Style on March 26:b. Irish papers
please copy.
I am, sir, your obedient servant,
W. Allen Whitworth.
St. John’s Vicarage, Hammersmith.
Dressing for Health.
At the British Sanitary Congress,
held at Newcastle, a paper by Dr. Al
fred Carpenter was read on the “S uni
tary Aspect of Dress.” He first di
rected attention to the foot, aud said
that not one-half of the population
had really natural feet. The cause
was not far to seek, for parents were
forgetful of the fact that children’s
feet had a tendency to grow larger as
the children grew. It would be far
better for children to be brought up
without wearing any kind of boot at
all than to have the muscles wasted,
the bones distorted aud the joints per
verted in their action in the way in
which it was the custom now to do
among the low, rich and poor. Refer
ring to high heels and pointed toes,
he said it certainly argued a low taste
aud a very weak intellect when such
things as these were worn by the lady
who aspired to be considered as a
“queen or society,” and who wished to
make a sensation among her fellows.
High heels and pointed toes must
interfere with exercise, must make
the wearers sufLr from want of mus
cular exeftion, and therefore must lay
the foundation f >r all those diseasis
which spring from dyspepsia and all
its allies. It was this tendency to
place ligatures on the other parts of
the body as well as the foot which so
often rendered human nature ridicu
lous aud produced suffering of the
most serious kiud. The good sense of
the English nation was abolishing
stays from the list of articles which
young girls wore, but they were sadly
too much used,even now. HeaLh was
sacrificed to figure, the viscera of the
body were displaced in the most ex
traordinary manner from the posi
tion which they should occupy, be
cause it was thought by some that a
slim waist was a thing of beauty. The
way in whloh infants were clothed
and ligatured, often to their fatal in
jury, aud the materials in whloh they
were enveloped, too thin In oold
weather, and too thiok, heavy and hot
lu summer, formed a very important
subject whloh he dealt with in detail,
and he also spoke of the use by manu
facturers of arsenic, antimony and
lead as coloring materials for the pur
pose of rendering the article heavy in
the weighing scales.
He also touohed upon the manner
In whldA linens an (W wool
Parliament dared not do, and which
the Queen and Court v/evo unable to
effect, would not be produced by the
iSuntary Institute ; but as Parliament
had erased to enact sumptuary laws
because real knowledge and good
sense were opposed to such enactments
so the Sanitary Institute, by promul
gating sound information upon the
matters in question, might influence
public opinion aud assist In bringing
good sense into power even among the
votaries of fashion and the followers
of custom. This might in lime pro
duce the desired effect, even more cer
tainly than could be done by the
Q leen, the Lords aud the Commons
combined, or by compulsion in any
form.
Peel's Corner.
Mithras.
When his eyes upon ncr be
She trembles—lor she Is not fair—
And scarce she would that he should see
Tne absence of all beauty there.
When his lips her fingers press,
Can she sigh with such a care ?
Ah, no; lor in that dear caress,
She kaows her b est and feels her lair.
When his arms about her meet,
Then she breathes diviner air;
With his ueart her pulses beat,
Blooms her soul and makes her fair,
What Is Death 1
Looking on a page where stood
Graven of old on old-world wood
Death, and by the giave s edge grim,
Pale, the young man lacing him,
Asked my well-beloved of me
Once what strauge thlug this might be,
Gaunt and great of limb.
Death, f told him; and, surprise
Deepening more his wild wood eyes
(Like some sweet fleet thlug woose breath
Speaks all spling though nought it saith),
Up he turned nls rose-bright face,
Glorious with Its seven years’ grace,
Asking—Wnat Is death?
The Odyssey.
As one that lor a weary space has lain
Lulled by the song of Circe aud her wine
lu gardens near the pale ul Proserpine,
Wuere tUat iEie iri Isle iorgets the main,
And only the low lutes of love complain,
•l nd only shadows of wan lovers pine
As Mich a one were glad to know tne brine
Salt on his lips, and the large air again.
So, gladly, from the songs ol modern speech
Men turn, aud see the stars, aud feel the free
Shrill wind beyond the close of heavy flowers,
And through the music ol the languid hours
They hear like ocean on a western beach
The surge and ttiunder of the Odyssey.
Two Roses.
0 brilliant, blooming, bright-red rose,
Whose seen led odor heavenward goes,
1 love thy beauty, color, rlze,
Thou sweetest flower beneath the skies !
Bat greater far than I love thee,
1 love two love who gav’st thee me.
Though siia with thee might well commune,
A) thou with her could’st truly vie,
Thou hast a richness in thy bloom,
And she has beauty in her oye ;
Her look inspires eternal bliss ;
Thine breatnts forth N iture's loveliness.*
Thou art a rose, aud so Is she ;
Each blossoms In the bright to-day,
Pure as thou art may ner life be,
Until It shed its parting ray !
E'en as at night, thy portals close,
Bo shall her eyelids find repose.
A Few Jokes,
Never go into a railway superin
tendent’s offlee with a clergyman.
There is nothiug a railway man hates
to see more thau a man coming in to
introduce a coupler.
As good almost to kill a man as a
good book. Many a man lives a bur
den to the earth ; but a good book is
he precious life-blood of a master
spirit, embalmed and treasured up on
purpose to a life beyond life.
Fashionable ladies now appear at
concerts, theatre 1 -* and other public
gatherings, with dainty,
lets, leaving their cheese
home. Sensible, indeed!
the ot o ipant of the seat in
some chance to view the
evening
small bo
covers a
For it gi
the rea
stage.
Whe^Arabi comes over here to lec
ture, iwll be on the lookout for those
fellow# who have been punning on
te.
his nti
Ai
Bnortgage on a house is like a
wotJ
V-holu in an apple.
Before you
kml
v it, there is more
worm-hole
tlm?
fruit.
11 ’Tls home where e’er the heart is.”
•Then you should always feel at home
in the butoher shop, wherein Is not
only the heart but the liver.
Virginia has 172 tobaoco factories,
which consume 48,000,000 pounds of
wqAaunually.
The Field of Science
The ScUntifle American says that
the pr»j dice against American hem
lock-tanned leather lias disappeared,
and English tanners now appreciate
its excellent qualities. Its capabilities
for resisting water and withstanding
wear by attrition in the soles aie said
t > be quite equal to those of the best
English sale leather, and greatly su
perior to the leather of English
“mixed” tannages or the generally
poor sole leather made on the conti
nent of Europe.
An artist of Florence several years
ago introduced a method of painting
on silk or other fabrics in such a way
that the surfaces cf the colors were not
damaged when folded or ruobed, but
remained as bright and as smooth as
when first laid on by the brush. The
medium of the Adolfi process is no
longer kept secret, as it is protected by
patent. It is manufactured for the
use of amateurs and others. Some
Italian artists, it is said, have tried
the mediu n tor ordinary oil painting
on canvas.
The British were not the first to
bring balloons with them to Egypt
for purpe ses of war. They were cer
tainly taken out by the French airny
in 1794 Bonaparte was unable to use
them, however, as the apparatus for
the preparation of the hydrogen gas
was destroyed when Nelson annihila
ted the French fleet at Aboukir. These
balloons were ycry small, having a
capacity of only 539 cubic metres.
They were made of silk, and were
inflated with hydrogen made by
causing steam to act on iron filings.
From a paper read before the R *yal
Society (f Tasmania, by the Rev. J.
E Tenison Wood, it appears that the
sweetbriar has become a rampant and
formidable weed, and so have the
cochineal cactus and one or two of its
k'ndred developed into similar nui
sances in Australia and Tasmania.
The European fuiz > has a’so grown
very abundant in Tasmania, hut as yet
it does not 11 >unsh on the mainland
of Australia. The American butterfly,
Dauais crippus, occurs all over Aus
tralia, aud has been seen far out at sea
in enormous flights.
To copper or brass objects with silver
without difficulty or loss of time, the
following process is given : Mix two
parts of chloride cf silver with twenty
parts of powdered cream of tartar and
fifteen parts of powdered common
salt. Moisten a suitable quantity ot
the mixture with water, and rub it
with a piece of blotting paper upon
the metallic olj’ct, which must be
thoroughly clean. The latter is after
ward rubbed with a piece of cotton
upon which precipitated chalk is
dusted, then washed witn water, and
polished with a dry cloth.
The manufacture of alcohol from
potatoes by means of hydrocliloiic
acid is carried on entirely in Germany
according to Les Oer.ie Civil, as bil
lows: The potatoes are introduced
into apparatus in which they arc-
treated with steam at high pressure;
aud then sac iharitieation is efteoted
with hydrochloric acid, and the excess
of acid is neutralized with cat bonate
of soda. The cooled mass is submit
ted to fermentation in vats, then dis
tilled. When saturation has been
reached the residues may without in
convenience, be employed as food for
cattle.
Among the many fillers in use for
porouH hard wood this i s recommend
ed as one of the best: Stir boiled oil
aud corn-starch into a very thick
paste ; add a little japan aud reduoe
with turpentine, but add no color for
light ash. For dark ash and chestnut
use a little raw sienna; for walnut,
burnt umLor aud a slight amount of
Venetian red; for bay wood, burnt
sie#na. In no caso use more color
than is required to overcome the
white appearauw <-f the starch, unless
it is wished to stain tho wood. The
tiller is worked with brush and rags in
the usual manner. Let it dry forty-
eight hours, or until it is in condition
to rub down with No. 0 sand paper,
without much gumming up, and if an
ex ra-line finish is desired fill again
witii the same materials, using less
oil, but more of j ipan and turpentine.
— r
Logging in Nevada.
A chute Is laid from the river’s brink
up the steep mountains to the railroad,
aud while we are felling it, the mon
ster logs are rushing, flying, leaping
down the declivity. They come with
the speed of a thunderbolt and some
what of its roar, A track of smoke and
fire follows them—fire struck by th a
friction with the chute logs. Ti
descend the 1700 feet of the chute
14jsecopds,
In doing so they drop 700 feet per
pendicularly. They strike the deep
wat t with a report that can be heard
a ruilo distant. Logs fired from can
non could scarcely have a greater
velocity than they have at the foot of
the chute. The average velocity is
over 100 feet in a second throughout
the entire distance, aud at the instant
they leap from the mouth their speed
is 290 feet per second.
A sugar pine log sometimes weighs
teutons. What a missile! How the
water is dashed into the air. Like a
grand plume of diamonds aud rain
bows tho feathery spray is hurled to
the height of 100 feet. It forms the
grandest fouutain ever behel'. How
the waters foam and seethe and lash
against the shore! One log, having
spent Us force by its mad pluuge into
the deep waters, has 11 mted so as to be
at right angles with the path of the de
ceiving monsters.
The mouth of the chute is perhaps
fifteen feet above the suiface cf the
water, A huge log, hurled from the
chute, cleaved the air aud alights on
the floating log. You know how a
bullet glances; but can you imagine a
saw log glancing. The end strikes
wlih a heavy shock, but glides quick-
ly past for a short distance, then with
a crash like the reverberation of artil-
1 ry, the falling log springs vertically
into the air and with a curve like a
rcoket falls into the water, a long dis
tance from the leg it struck.
An Encounter With a Bear in a
Cave.
Henry A H Ul, one of our most pop
ular letter-carriers, is in Ne.v Bruns
wick, enj >ying a snort vacation. Mr.
Hall is quite a Nimrod, and with rifle
and fLking-tackle is making havoc
among the denizens of the forests and
lakes of New Brunswick. From a pri
vate letter we are permitted to make
t he follo wing extracts : “I cannot close
this letter without telling of a little
close rub I have had since here, though
you may think I am exercising a Yan
kee privilege of bragging. Last Mon
day, when out in the forest about
twenty miles from town, I came across
a camp of Frenchmen, wheie I hired
a young boy to guide me into the
woods About two hours after we
started we came to a c ,v ) and I sent
the boy in out of curiosity. He called
out there were some bear cubs inside.
Just a* he did so I heard a crashing
and growling beside me and had
just time to bring my trusty rifle to
my shoulder and fire at a black mass
that tumbled past me, and as it
plunged iuto the mouth of the cave I
realized bruin had come hack. I
don’t know how I ever did It, but I
have an iudistiuct recollection of drop
ping my gun, drawing my bowie-
knife and jumping into the dense
darkness of the csr e. It is as a dream "
—horrible—ancj like a nightmare in
which every'.uing is mixed. I re
member plunging my kuife again and
again i^to the body, the warm jet of
blood, the tearing of claws acioss my
body, the hot break in my fspe. a
close embrace—then darkness! When
I revived I was lying outside the caye
and the Frenchmen were cuttiugupthe
monster, which weighed when dress
ed, 450 pounds. Petit Pierre, my boy
guide,had been in the'cave during my
combat, aud, when the b ar fell on
me in his death struggle, he crawled
out of the cave and ran back to camp,
r am all right, or shall be when the
marks of the brute’s claws are healed.
I shall bring his skin back with me
tnd I wish I could give you a piece o
the beef.”
Habits of the Codfish.
1
. i
A correspondent of the New Yolrk 1
Post says that the codfish frequence ^
“ the table lands of the sea.” • The
codfish no doubt does this to secure
as nearly as possible a dry, bracing
atmosphere. This pure air of the sub
marine table lands gives to the codfij
that breacth of chest and doptl
lungs whioh we have always not
The glad, free smile ef the
is largely attributed to the exhil
of this oceanic altitoodleum.
The correspondent further i
“ the cod subsists largely on
cherry.” Those who have nt
the pleasure of seeing the
olirnb the sea cherry tree in sc
food, or clubbing the fruit frol
heavily laden branohes with ol
of coral have missed a very fine
The oodflsh, when at horn]
bling through the submarine^
doft not wear his vest unbutj
he does while loafing aro{
grocery stores of the Unit