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The True Citizen, Wednesday, September 6, 2023 — Page 5
James Thompson
“Thompson’s Travels’’
WHO IS MY ACQUAINTANCE?
In the South, we often seem
to categorize the people we
encounter into two groups:
strangers and friends. Every
one obviously starts off in the
“stranger” column, but it’s not
very difficult to move from one
list to the other. If the average
small-town Georgian has talked
to you once and you weren't a
complete jerk... well, congratu
lations! You’ve made a new
friend. After two conversations,
you might end up as a guest of
honor at someone’s wedding.
We tend to form friendships
more quickly than is possible
in many other cultures.
I was recently in Germany,
where this sort of immedi
ate friendship is completely
foreign. There, society recog
nizes an intermediate level of
familiarity: the Bekannter, or
acquaintance. If two Germans
are on speaking terms with each
other but are not particularly
close, they consider each other
acquaintances, not friends, and
will say so openly.
The word “acquaintance” is
known to us, of course, but can
you imagine actually introduc
ing someone that way? “John,
I’d like you to meet Tom. He’s
an acquaintance of mine from
high school.” It just sounds
rude, even if it’s more honest.
To a German, however, this
wouldn’t be offensive, just
direkt.
I was discussing all of this
with some German friends (or
acquaintances?), and they of
fered this explanation for their
aversion to instant camaraderie:
If a friendship can be so easily
established, then it is probably
a shallow bond with little real
foundation. The connection
will be limited to exchanging
pleasantries and small talk, and
neither person will make any
substantial investment of time
or effort in the relationship.
After chewing on this a while,
I had to admit that this critique
did describe many of my friend
ships. I have many types of
friends: church friends, college
friends, childhood friends, work
friends, family friends, even
a few good friends. Unfortu
nately, I see most of them just a
couple of times a year, and even
those interactions are often
brief and hurried. It’s not that I
don’t desire a more meaningful
rapport; there are just so many
friends and so little time! For
me, this has something to do
with bouncing between three
continents over the past few
years. Being more rooted in
one place would allow me to be
more connected to that place’s
people.
However, I think there are
also broader cultural forces
at work. At its best, southern
hospitality demands that any
person of good will be accepted
as a friend. While this may
result at times in a tendency
toward superficiality, it also cre
ates an atmosphere of kindness
and warmth that can’t be found
everywhere. I do desire deeper
friendships, but not at the ex
pense of leaving other social
contacts in the cold and im
personal “acquaintance zone.”
There’s always room for a few
more friends.
Shortly after the Germans
and I had this conversation, we
were standing in line outside
an ice cream shop. A stranger
suddenly engaged us in con
versation, and we all chatted
amicably for a few minutes.
Later, I asked my companions
if they now considered that per
son their acquaintance. “No, of
course not!” they replied a bit
incredulously. “We only talked
for a few minutes. What would
you call them?” I smiled. “I’d
say that you just made a new
friend.”
James Thompson has lived
in Georgia, Germany, and
Thailand. After growing up in
Sylvania, his first big move was
to Athens to attend UGA. The
Dawgs waited until a few years
after he graduated to start win
ning national championships,
and no, he's not bitter. After
college, a yearlong exchange
program took him to the Ger
man city of Freiburg. Fie cur
rently serves as an international
campus minister at a university
near Bangkok,
BBB urges caution in wake of recent storms
KELVIN COLLINS
In the aftermath of last
week’s storms, the Better Busi
ness Bureau urges the public to
exercise caution when hiring a
contractor to repair damages.
Natural disasters can bring
out the best in people; unfor
tunately, it also brings out con
artists looking to capitalize off
of others grief.
Property owners will want to
make repairs to their home or
business as quickly as possible.
Unfortunately, unscrupulous
contractors or scam artists may
take advantage of the post
disaster chaos to scam unsus
pecting property owners out of
money or provide shoddy ma
terials or sub-standard work.
BBB offers these tips for
selecting a contractor to repair
any damages:
• Check with your insurance
company about policy cover
ages and any specific filing
requirements the company
may have.
• Don’t act in haste and
never sign anything you do
not understand. If someone is
insisting you sign immediately,
this is a red flag you need to
find another contractor. Make
temporary repairs if necessary.
• For major permanent re
pairs, take time to shop around
for contractors, get competitive
bids, check out references,
make sure the contractor is
properly licensed, and check
out their BBB profile at bbb.
org. Be suspicious of out-of-
town contractors looking to
make a quick buck off of your
misfortune. Will they still be
around if a problem arises
later?
• Try to be patient. When an
area has extensive damage, it
may take some time for a local
contractor to get to you. While
this can be frustrating, this is
where scam artists can come
in and manipulate your anxiety
to their advantage. Do not be
pressured into making a snap
decision.
• While being patient, also
act promptly. Insurance poli
cies require you take action
to prevent further damage to
your property. You may need
to move your personal belong
ings to a different location, cut
off the water supply, or have a
tarp placed on your roof, (but
only if this can be safely done).
Thoroughly clean out mud and
residual material from heating
and cooling units and let the
units dry out before determin
ing whether the equipment is
functional or needs repairs.
• Get a written agreement
with your contractor that out
lines the repairs to be done, the
types of materials to be used,
and the price breakdown for
both labor and materials. Re
view it carefully before sign
ing. Insist that the contractor
obtain all necessary permits
and avoid anyone who asks you
to provide your own permits.
The person obtaining the per
mit is the one responsible for
ensuring that all work meets
code requirements. That needs
to be the contractor, not you.
• Be wary if a contractor asks
you to sign an estimate. Many
unscrupulous contractors have
you sign what you think is an
estimate but in reality, is a bind
ing contract. Also watch out for
cancellation fees sometimes
referred to as liquidation dam
ages. These are fees charged
to a homeowner if they decide
to use a different contractor. If
you are unsure what you are
reading, ask the contractor to
spell it out for you.
• Never pay for all repairs in
advance and do not pay cash.
Disasters are a stressful
event. Victims should never
feel forced to make a hasty de
cision or to choose an unknown
contractor. Start With Trust!
For reliable information, lists
of BBB Accredited Businesses
by industry and BBB Business
Reviews you can trust, visit
BBB.org.
Kelvin Collins is president
& CEO of the Better Business
Bureau serving the Fall Line
Corridor.
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