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The’ Atlanta Georgian .4nd News SFCOND BECKON. AT], A NT A, QA., SATURDAY, MABCH 0. 1907. 'The Dictionary of Misinformation WEX JONES, Ltxieograplw. ALLOON—A floating flat. Ok, won't jou com* (id a poos With at In my ball***. CIOOO to tko Moomlor noon; Ok, do. K whta sepbyra or* crooulog await to be apooatof Aad tightly billooelax With you. —Dippy IHtU". BEE—Tho onglnoor of a honeycomb. ■ BISCUIT—A rock in tha toa of matrimony. ilUBBT—Toor rooking** Improving, mj aor; tbla la b lighter b(eo*(I than uaual. WIKI—Ob. dart lag I gar. rota a door- ■ok by Blataka—Daataallo Dialogtire. BOILER—A naaaaa of aupplylflg CAPTAIN—Whera'a Judina? FIBBT OKFICKR—Ootaa aloft CAPTAIN—Wbr 7 riKirr OFFICII a—Want with tho hollar, r.—YooMool Talks. CHAMPAGNE—Wlna buffering from exaggerated ago. COMMUTER—One ortso drape bun- dlea In tba mud and awaara at rail- "Whya^th* ^ ^chlag tha oraagae eff "ltfa*s commatcr." "Aad who'a the other gar Mylar 'ire aa outrage, I tell root It'a aa oatragaT “ "Bra another eoauMtar." "Aad wbo'a tho marry aport that looka aa If Ardent loaf a million dollara gad a wife a booted after' him DetfpWaJapnee. CORK—A plena of bark Immovably fixed la tba neck of a bottle. pnrOEB—Aa attachment for tha Air play of rlnga. "Oea, aha r FROG—Wbat freg-lege coma from. ZiplrfugV*0, I will taka too down a peg OIRL—0 00 da am know* what h a «bf la a dear aad a dertl; A alaaer and ealat to aaa: ha'a crooked aad aa tha larati ■hr* anal, aad aoft aa a data: ha'a ugly aad ratlahlag meaty t Hie’i Met .somarthg to loro. am OOP. PRISONER—One who watohoo wlt- noaaoa being Mad. SAW—A fcnlfa with a hair owt with a' braln- The Complmtatuy Gtmt flaikloaakle hoetoae greeted a yaong man ata deace, -go glad to aee yea," aha Mid, "bat where la yoor brother? Why taer "Ha aaa at aa ___ . tit foe It.” "Teaasd ap! Raw delightful!" cried thi beateaa.' “Aad yaw wen I” Shag yawaed .aad aaswared abaaotly: "Nat 1 loat.“—Argaaant, .... Mott LA* Collin. ■Mb of drtah ate aot aeed la the Udder af •eoeeaa.-Atchlaea Bar f hosts vara Not Quite So Cloae. However. The aaaaa of daty, Ilka our ehadow.l Blrhra art Ilka aaa'water, tka man yaa Tha tlooamaat ef Mlta g cllaga to aa to tha grara.-Baltlmore Amor- 1 drink the Ulrttlar goa haaama—Bckapaa aaiaaaeadla ladlaaa, "w * baaar.paly paachaa grow."—Cltvrl Ska Wai Sweet on Soma One. Mill gadl* Lemon b mURaT The New Coins. By JAMES J. MONTAGUE. ^WASHINGTON, D. C., Feb. —President Roosevelt has come ** lo the conclusion that the gold coins of the United States lack 'Ui«iic qualities, and he has asked a New York artist to prepare some *» designs. S INC a song o’ twenties—mined and minted gold. Decked with strenuous bas-reliefs, alining to behold. Off with old Dame Liberty—off with all the stars, efface the poor old eagle bird, and make a place for Man. Let art and action side by side the nation'• optics please R >' stamping on our yellow cash such frenzied scenes as these: * r F.DDy baiting brawling bean; Teddy drawing nigh Intrepidly the dangerous lairs where wrathful bob-cats lie. jfddy roping buffalo; Teddy sitting tight ton the brutal broncho while it bucks with all its might; [eddy bidding cdtamounts and limber wolves "avaunt,” hat’s the kind of money that will All a long felt want. OINC a song o' ten-spots, gleaming, glowing discs. Upon whose face the mustang lopes, the wild coyote frisks. Let Remington submit designs to circle with the wreath, WTi Wolfvifla'a cattle punchsis .write -Aa Western words beneath. while on the little fivers it would not be ftr amiss to celebrate the stunts of peace, somewhat, perchance, like this: ‘J'FDDY welting Webster and his foolish spelling book. * Teddy telling fathers how to tend the kids and cook. • Teddy showing infants they must shun strong drink and cards, ■Jut drop their men with Krags, it. .1 shot at eighteen thousand yards. ■ eddy putting Frisco unresistingly to sleep; ’in like that true patriots jvoufd all be proud to keep. • Bobbie's Essays. MR, E. Z. MARK AND THE HONEST FINDER. Ira capnbbt. tsar, by 1. STRANQIR—Sir, f found this peekat- baak Juat eutalda your gata. I thought I had batter bring It In to you. It dopant belong to your Wall, will you plesae It —tha keep loter may coma thla way Ingulfing. I will drop back later In tha day, and If tharo It any reward I should llko to hive It 2. MR. E. Zc—You art an hontat young man, and yeu ahall have any reward given by tha loaar. Wa had batter look Into tha pooketbeok and sea what aro tha contents. Two flve-hundred-dollar note a, aoma pri vate paper* and a latch ktyl All right yeung man, yeu atop back later. S. OTHER STRANQIR (later)—The poekstbook I lost contained two flva-hun- drad-dallar netta, aoma private papers and a latch key. Yet this Is It Now, I would Ilka to glva tha flndar one hundred dollara’ reward. You couldn’t change me thla five hundred, could you, alrT MR. E. Z.—Yaa, I eaij. Hare are four one-hundred-dollar note*. I will glva tha young man tha ana hundred dollara whan ha returns later In tha day. 4. MRS. E. Z. (on hop return)—What Is thla? strong* tho yeung man hasn’t re- turnadl B. Z., 1st mo aaa that Hve-hun- drad-dollar note you changed. Bah I I theught eol A low-down aauntarfalt E. Z-, you’ve bean buncoed out of another four hundred. Thoae two men ware con federates. fi ■ BARBELS. •rbaio la bard 0 rooad A tkay are need 1 , M by tha hide to play a gala, or tka Yn Ttar * Ir * maay ktadt aarb l^aalaa A Cammlaa A Aggeti ate. la . *'r 'bay are JmI Ilka paapal, tbs ««»'« la tha ytch ooaa, ay Troata. A tba •.T.mtns la oalmad after tka wmmaa ''I’d. * tha OltMlra la the paapal tbat •" b'twaao tha Treat* A tha rommoe "PH. they hare t Uttla *'* broka pretty paty. •ban wa are Uttla bays A garla wa pity <h mtrbala af tba rogolar alio, vary ■L. A whaa wa grew ap ta be big Ilka J Pa wa play Witt peal aad bHyufd >*K ; :V J*. "baa yaa wte lha calm yaa Mbs ■IVotte* / 1, ?ro them " wee all tk* marbsla from ,; *»• * taak them beam ta akav Item ta *b* aro yaa aaa a bad hay to * fjm haad’a mtrbala. ga ikd giro a,*.,bjf* A wtla aka wee tailing •"*u play la* Brio*. WUU^ ^ By WILLIAM F. KIRK. WI? RATER. Mtatar Webattr waa a grata man at tbla reaetry, af wktrk tbart waa two (2) kinds 1: Denial Wabatar. 11 Nath Wabatar. Daalal Wabatar waa a grata lawyar A a Boa apaakar. ba aad maay grata tblaga la Coagrtaa A had them printed la tk* papara. wkaa k* wai ■ llttal bay kta brother Zake cbogkt a woodchuck A wa* going to tall It ta tk* batrkar bat Daalal aad my brother, weald yaa aa* that llttal talma! made lata Patted Veal? A Ibaa tbart ratkar aiada Diolrl let the wood chuck go. Noah Wabatar waa aaotbar See mao. b* wrote tba dlekakrnary, wick tain at what artrytklag la. Ilk* A Grapefruit la a l-amou'i Big Bratbar A A Pratldtnt la a Corly Hrodad Man Wire Navtr Told a U \Vhrn Nash Wabatar waa making thla beak b* had tboaaaada ef llttal card! no wlrb k* wrote tha wurda aad tbar* mroa- lags, but Daalrl aerar played with that many tarda, oaly S3 aad aamUawa eat that maty.