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Best Mlt anMRumor famous Brttets tor SJouttQ anb ©lb. COFTBIOOT. INI. IT f, & IUU1 QUil BHITXII AJQHTt IHUn& The Hall-Room Boys. Bra£go the Monk. | BRIEF BIOGRAPHIES.- I ! By Wex Jones. C KI'SOK, UOHIN'SON—-Famous as the only nan who didn't give a whoop for fa a companies, lea companies. ++ ♦ ♦ ♦ 44 ♦ ♦ ♦ ♦ 4444 44♦♦♦♦ ‘•treat ear companies. or any but human! .company. Crusoe lived on the only laland not rendered iuacetiaible by ferric* and free from real estate agents and lvtthing beaehea. Cluba—oak. Hickory. Aali. Favorite Amusement—Thinking. .KIPLING. RUDYARD*-An author who makes proae appear like rerne and verse [like proae.. He Is an enthusiastic motorist and meterlat. and strains his auto license «* ; almost as much as his poetic license. Clulw—Gora and Croaabonea, Naval and-* Literary. . . . Favorite Amusement— Preaching. j NICHOLAS—As the Caar of Rntlla. Nlch-i i0las hna a life Job—that Is. It* a life Job 1 provided none of his friend* succeed In making It a death Job. The Caar Is of * retiring disposition, hut unfortunately for the hanplnesa of hla people, be wants the other fellows to do all the retiring. Clubs-—Target. Bosses'. Vodka. Let It glide Society, Nitroglycerine. , Favorite Amusement—Dodging ’em. PKNX. WILLIAM—The man who put Philadelphia to aleep. I UOJESTVKNSKV. ADMIRAL---* Rltsalan , T admiral conrt-taartUled for doing his best. 1“ Chiba—"Down and Opt,* Waterwagon, j ‘' { ‘ Urorl’to Amusement—None. LIKNI81 I to see CROWN PRINCE OF GERMANY—Noted ns the link between the Kaiser and his grandson. . •'. NIMROD-A mlgbt.r days of repeating rides and* mag tides. Nimrod was nerer photographed with Ills foot on the neck ot a dead an telope, and consequently Is not so famous as he might have been. WALTON. IZAAK^Walton was an ami able angler who sometimes forgot his bait, but never his ale. He was one of the first to discover that the fish, though si* lent himself. Is a great cause of speech In oHIerg. dobs Hook and Lie. Favorite Amusemant -Hplnnlng them. H H R Why? Why do most English writers give us "honour/* but Macaulay nnd Dickens honor’*? Why do most of us write “no- * .. ... . ... ... 1 - Why Why does the _ _ _ and the Prayer Book “Judgement . do most of 11s sound the “h ,f In “who” and “whom/* and slur It In “which** and 1 ‘where/* sound the "I" In "oft” and alurj It In "often”? Why do Milton and our; French cousins make “colonel" three ayl-L tables and every one else two? Why do moat of na pronounce •'mourn” and "mom”' exactly alike, and "surpass" and "trespass” differently? Why have ‘propone” and ,f prop- osltlon.” "one” and "only,” different pro- - * nunelatlon*? Why do vast numbers of Eng- : * * Ilsh-speaklng folk pronounce ••girl" differ-. * ’ ently from "twirl" and "awlrl”? Why <jo 1 ,. all pronounce the "I” In "wold” and ,. The Landlady Objects When They Prepare Their Own Meals. BRAGGO THE. MONK. DINKELSPIELERS. Copyright, 1000. by Atntrifan-Jounial Examiner. nrj HOLIDAY In dcr hand nlnd In H It alt a holiday In der bu«b. Dor milk of human klndnraa vaa then- trailjr vattrtd at^dcr^pump of selfiahncas. .. Marriages dot vaa made In Hnaftn ! -' alrajra haf a union label on dom. • • • Monty cannot huy happiness, hut, on dcr udder hand, it atema to he able to. get along pretty ^vell^ mHould It. Yon can fool udder people* aoma of der time, but you can fool youraelf till der time. • * • Der more ve get older der more re get knowledge dot rt know lean den ve thought re knew. He Explains How Easy It Is to Avoid Accidents with Fireworks. nowa no turning. Jttj Mo*t of pa1 vould be dankfitl for der* Early to bed und early to rise Is a dings ve haf If ve vaa not so busy reach* splendid Idea mit der eggaceptlon dot Ing ould for der dlnga ve haffent. nobody doea It dot can do uodervlae. • • ♦ | ... Der rorld owes eferjr man a llflni, but I vlab I hat all der money dot l« eome people* vould rather etarfe der^ col- epent py der men dot try to get aome- lect der bill. ... ding for nuddinga. Yen a pretty peach of a vlmmena goea ’ Der heat choke I elfer heard sounded terrible foolieh until 1 aaw der point, Der rtyrard child Urea to be der man dot fall* py de r ^va jalde. A banana peel vaa a foot choke-maker heranae ve tumble to It eo kvlck. For der Bummer reeortera: Ven a girl telle you ehe doan’d know how to alng rioand coax her, became ahe may pror* It. D. DINKEL8l*IEL. per George V. Hohart. Jaded - Palate*. Nothing new to eet haa been dlaeovertd for aev.ral renturlea paat. Tba monotony la not confined to breakftet; It la ennally. It not more eo. felt at lunch and at dinner. There are dlegncefully few animal, lit to eat, end. the Okapi, which seemed, tent to solve the difficulty. !* e bitter disap pointment. beauae thare are only three apectmena of him known to ealat, and two of thoae are ataffcd.-London Sketch. NOW, WHAT D’YE THINK OF THAT! I And I do not care for yottod tongue; I glanea, than look askance, at ccnned I’m aad theaa day*. I dar# not whittle Lett time I did, a eauaage on wondtr why! corned beef, When I dine. bor’a plate And order pit. Jumped on to mine. a neigh. Dmkelspiel on Small Talk- -By George V. Hohart I entered Hoelety. It res et Newport. I To to Into atl der details In dla letter She-No: der ttaemer couldn't call for recollection, und der acene la vun vlcb till vould .lie too ecffstempnrnnrmi*. I/Mey. but my trunks m KIN I.leber aperkle forth through history Ilka a yet because yon nek It I Till elf you a leedle You-Doea your bnaband tike Bar Harbor? Looey — Ve bathing suit on n aun-avept bench. bunch of rot ve call -small talk” la Ho- She—No: bn earn home-medo bora vaa haf your let- It yna tt Mrs. Plrktesbtne’e reception nnd clety. vlcb you vlll And useleee veo you B<M) , enough for him. ter from Her Harbor bright der lamp ahont ofer brava vlmmena meet a ledy belonging to der Smart Setters You-Vas you going to haf n new dtvorro nnd your mother and nnd (tlr men. for der feint time. gj, Kali, or vtll yon nee lone Sommer at I vn« glnt to know I res eggatremely nerfons should making Let auppo.ltlon n«w. Looey, dot ahe Wl ^.y. husband ret. nome so f«o it dot you yaa beginning my debuttal. but I vent tbrongb der ordeal rat gracefully aeated la a low-neck ebalr , , T , uf tat B0 cll , nr , to „ to eneboy yonr waca- mitould haring to unbutton my collar. 0D ,|, r plsasaa rile you vaa leaning artist. ofer yet. , lion at dot famous Ven I entered der reception ball nnd lonlly ogalnst der upright vlcb anpporto der Yon—Van you fott,l of pickled Ice cream! place ytre yon tnten- bonded my nvrnhora to der feetmen der roof nnd also a sign vlcb says "Vet Paint." a he-No. thank yon: n high ball cm de »1ny until live <nn hurst ,u, n re. From ,| me r „„ .houi.l geae ould nicely ' m frtufaaa fiafrtpa bnttp e. . . .. . ' 7 * minutes before your return tlgget egg- iplres. It vaa a dramatic moment. •'Should I remove my shoei •lao to der feetrann !** thought serosa der blue voters of der oce.14. und manliness, firmly but surely ofer Id E* 1 * 11 "* 1 accentuation? You ask me In your •*!• he der real ding or does bo vear open* her face a largo bunch of clgaroot amok# Bhe—I prefer brides vist,* DM two dollars st It yesterday, f You—I»o you venr your rhewtni der starboard or der port aide? She—No. but I vlll pnff n dgsroc If flare vaa nobody looking. After dls you aboold change de v Hobart ,< * !t * r * *° ,#Dd t»eo socks!" thought der <100. "DtaiifUpt”l!” * y° u an for ■ 4Mn# It *'a* ® critical moment, but not a critic po'lte gonversatlonlng vaa dare, rich you could use . Futtently dcr blue Mood arose to my stir* mlt *ome of der ladle* of der^fair aex auch un<J j yj|f MJt a low bow I sa you vould meet on der porch of der hotel. gbook hflnd „ m|t ^ ,, ut|er und m|n . I va» glat yon asked yonr olt father n|M •gtorerar«Iw I vaa at my rise asking der •txmld dla. lone* because t .lnand know ho „ nia vo , r „ fnr , i)pp , r vlch you haf no turder After dla you vlll small talk yourself* In dla ft oh Ion: You It vas a beautiful day to-day, als’d lt» y<**^ Klie—Yea. thank you; and so Is tSrmor mayl»e. laiioey. und »how her hotv mu* h ptlut anylmdy vlrh !* better able to gif you In* ^ feed!* later It vaa a complete triumph der seashore? You—Vlcb iHt yon like best, der ocean or faf removed mlt your Hansel suit. Dla Is slvays soot for a la He Amuses the Babv. aide Information should real Society doings f or TM| j H p'atc of soup in # M»e ! haf no preference, but If anydlng aesson of der J oar. Youra mlt luff, as vot I am. yet. |j tfr | # p Q j ^ c j,cut dot ttefer uacd soup lo I like dcr mountains. _D. DINKI'I.si'IKL, it time in* t.xrm. I fou K0 | 0 KutODO ISSt guiemee^ f vlll Defer forget, least. Ter George V. Uobsxt