Newspaper Page Text
A “FOWL” TRAGEDY.
Nine orphan biddies sat in a row
Under the dining room window;
What made them tremble and huddle
up so?
’Twas pussy cat, black as a cinder.
She came up to them and down she sat
And eyed them with gaze firm and
glowering—
They never had seen such a chicken
as that;
No wonder that they were cowering.
Little brown Tim, so fluffy and small,
Cheeped to his brother, gray Tickle:
“It looks like it’s going to eat us all.”
Here puss gave a sort of chuckle;
Then a sudd e n spring in the midst of
the bunch,
And she snatched up poor little
Tickle,
And bore him away, his bones to
crunch,
With teeth that w e re sharp as a
sickle.
ANNICE LYBARGER.
n
THE STUMP ORATOR.
The Washington Post notices the
passing of the stump orator, or rather
the decadence of his influence upon
the people as one of the notable signs
of the times. “Campaign committees,”
it says, “are finding it mor e and more
difficult to attract large audiences to
hear even the most eloquent speakers.
And the average orator, even if a num
ber of them are billed together and a
brass band and a cannon engaged to
emphasize the importance of the occa
sion, has, in recent years, frequently
failed to excite deep interest. Instead
of leaving their farms, factories,
stores, offices and other places of bus
iness most of the people continue their
customary avocations. Even if the
meetings are held at night, so as to
interfere with business as little as
possible, the old-time crowds and old
time enthusiasm are missing.”
The Telegraph agrees with the
Rome Tribune, which is “inclined to
think that the presence of the news
paper in the homes of the people, with
the plain unvarnished news items of
political e ve nts and the calm editorial
comment, disclosing the effect of polit
ical acts, has had much to do with
bringing about what, in the language
of the curb, would be called the ‘fin
ish’ of the stump orator.”
People will make up their minds
from reading newspapers before the
stump orator conies along, and those
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who agree with the general line it is
known that he will take, go out to
“whoop him up,” and those who do
not agree generally stay away. Very
few votes are made nowadays by
stump speeches
Another fact is that the average
stump orator is very much of a dema
gogue, and a large class of thinking
people know it, and discount him in
advance. They laugh at his jokes and
clap their hands when his periods are
rounded, but he makes no votes. —The
Macon Telegraph.
HOW FOUR BOYS CAMPED OUT.
By Walter K. Putney.
One summer four boys thought that
they would camp out for about a week
between haying and harvesting. The
forest in which they intended to camp
was not very large; in fact if one stood
at one end he could see through to
the other end.
The boys’ names were Archie, Billie,
Harry and Teddy. As they had no tent
they decided to make a hut in the mid
dle of the woods where there was no
thick underbrush. As these boys Were
not allowed to use good boards, they
pried and pulled and chopped out
enough good pieces from the old saw
dust pile for the four sides of their
camp.
The hardest thing to get was the
roof. At last they found what had once
been the cover of the front door which
had tin over it. It was so heavy, how
ever, that they could not carry it. Af
ter thinking for a while th e y got the
skeleton of an old wagon with the
two hind wheels on it. After much
trouble they got the door-cover on this
framework and pulled it down to the
woods. Two of the boys wheeled it
and two held it on.
The next thing was to get the door
cover on the four posts which were
the corners of the camp. They tried
all kinds of ways to do this, and after
much pushing, pulling and rolling on
pol e s they succeeded. The beds were
horse-blankets which Archie’s father
let them take, and the bedclothes were
also horse-blankets, which Harry
brought.
At night time the boys wer e pretty
well squeezed as there was barely
room for them. But they enjoyed
that first night’s sleep far better than
if they had been resting in their own
beds. They woke up about 3 o’clock
in the morning, started a fire just
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outside of the doorway, dressed as
soon as it was warm and had break
fast of toast and milk with one potato
apiece. Then they all went home to
do the chores of the morning.
Th e y were all back in time for din
ner, and in the afternoon went in
swimming in a pond about a mile from
the camp. They stayed in until it was
time to again do the chores —this time
the nightly ones. Then th e y found
some hooks and lines and went fishing.
They had intended to fry their catch
for supper, but as the fish had
their evening meal they did not bite
and consequently the boys had none
for supper. During the second night
the boys did not sleep very well as it
was pr e tty hot and close in the camp.
They were also made warmer because
they had to keep well covered up so
that the mosquitoes would not bite
them.
The next two days passed very
quickly about as the first and second
had done, with two or three visits each
day to the swimming pond. As the
following day was the one to break
up camp, and as they wished to get
as much fun as they could while they
were there, they did not sleep much on
the fourth night. I shall not tell you
all they did, but if you had been
there you would have seen four boys
running around in overalls, bare arm
ed and footed in spite of mosquitoes,
and having a fine time!
That autumn a f e w weeks later, Ar
chie and Teddy were going through
the woods and they stopped to peek
into the camp. There they found four
red squirrels in a nest near the roof.
I do not think they were as much
crowded as the four boys were the
summer before, but they could hardly
have enjoyed it any more.
*
ROYALTY COULD MOVE ON.
Buffalo Bill’s “Wild West” arrived
under the walls of the Eternal City,
and toward the great scout’s whooping
arena we bent our steps. The dance
was on when we arrived, but we found
an usher who was shoving and har
anguing a confused, seat-seeking
crowd of Italians, exhorting them in
home-like Nebraskan words.
“Everything’s gone all to thunder
today,” he remarked to us crossly.
“That there King and Queen’s her e .”
(His manner of alluding to the royal
personages suggested that he thought
of them as cards in a deck.) “We
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never got word th e y was cornin’ till
half an hour before we opened; the
boxes were all took and we’ve had
one blank of a time flxin’ things up
an’ gittin’ that King and Queen Settled
right. These coupons call for the next
box beyond ’em, and the Dago ush
ers have gone and stuck some people
in there, somebody that belongs to the
King and Queen, I reckon, and —”
“Then we’ll have to give up our
box?” some one asked nervously.
“Naw! You got the tickets, ain’t
you? You git it! Come on.”
A lady and three gentlemen were
seated in the box numbered upon our
coupons. “You git out o’ there,” said
our guide informally. “That ain’t your
box.”
There was an exclamation of horror
from an upper tier and one of the
English-speaking Italian ushers came
rushing down an aisle with a blanch
ed face; he bent himself double before
the occupants of the box, uttering
stricken apologies in Italian, which
were abruptly checked by our guide.
“Here! I ain’t got no more time to
waste. These folks got coupons fer
the whole box. Tell them people to
git out o’ there an’ tell ’em to hurry.”
“Get them out?” repeated the Ital
ian, immeasurably shocked. “Imposs
s-sible! You do not understand! It
is the Prince and Princess di ”
Our guide bent upon him a look of
withering pity. “That cuts all the ice
in Hudson’s Bay, don’t it?” he replied
with venomous distinctness, and then,
exasperated to the extent of his self
control: “You git ’em out o’ ther e !”
We interfered at this point and ef
fected a compromise by squeezing
more chairs into the box, to the pained
surprise of our usher who, as he
slouched away, manifested his opinion
of us as “easy.”—Booth Tarkington,
in the August Everybody’s.
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