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VO LU MT. TH KE E
HUM9EK NINETEEN
WHAT WE THINK OF WHAT WE SEE
9y A. Z. HAFfSAUIt, Managing Editor.
We learn from the Cleveland Leader that a drug
called “sclorin” is a perfect remedy for snake
bites. We hasten to inquire, Is it a liquid?
•e
A Texas prophet has announced that the world
will come to an end in 1911. Thank Goodness,
that loan on our house and lot is a five-year one.
A Philadelphia man who was sorely afflicted with
dyspepsia claims to have cured it by walking 1,800
miles. Now honest, which would you prefer, dys
pepsia or corns ?
*
Meal steaks have advanced twenty-five per cent
in this town. We rise to retract the unkind re
marks we made recently about the Queen of Portu
gal being sued by her butcher.
*
This question has been debated recently by the
Chicago Teachers’ Federation: “Is a school teach
er competent to choose a husband?” But you
know, choosing* isn’t all there is to it.
I?
A lady in Fort Wayne married a gentleman the
other day whom she had turned down at the altar
five years ago because he was drunk. Long time it
took him to sober up. Maybe it was near-beer?
n
The delegates to the convention in Chicago have
been receiving this advice from the local papers:
“Don’t drink beer or ice water. Take a lemon.”
Well, the delegates instructed for candidates other
than Taft certainly did.
*
The London Globe, in speaking of Morocco, says:
“Morocco, we learn from a consular report, has
a choice climate, fine scenery, great wealth of earth
and sea and sky, vast supplies of precious metals,
and the soil has never been more than scratched
by the crude wooden plows of the people —a soil
that will give three crops a year. There are
warm winds and sunshine for 300 of the 365 days
in the year; 300,000 square miles of fertile farm
land, or grazing land broken by majestic mountains,
We want our Agents to make a better record during the summer months than they have ever done
heretofore. We will do all we can at our end of the line to aid them in their work. We can furnishFclub
subscriptions with almost any magazines that may be desired at surprisingly low rates. We have prem
iums with paid subscriptions that are attractive. The “Prohibition Souvenir” which we give with each
paid subscription should be in every Georgia home. We give you choice of one of two books: “Sam
Jones’ Own Book” and “Quit Your Meanness” with each new subscription or each old subscription paid
one year in advance. Write to us.
THE GOLDEN AGE, 510 Lowndes Bldg., Atlanta.
ATLANTA, GA., JUNE 25, 1908.
or swept by foothills, crossed by rivers, and bounded
by the sea on two sides. There are vast forests
and valuable shrubs, and the sea is generously sup
plied with millions of fish. Despite the many cen
turies of life, Morocco has not been developed—it
is almost virgin territory. ”
Well, if we can secure a partner with some ex
perience in the real estate business, there is where
we want to go and start a newspaper.
A professor in Ann Arbor says that Timbuktu
will be the world’s capital in A. D. 4000, and Ban
tu the world’s language. Now who was it that said
not long ago that all this sort of thing originated
at the University of Chicago?
*
A gentleman walked into a barber shop, and ap
proaching the barber nearest the door, said: “My
hair is falling out. Can you recommend something
to keep it in?”
“Certainly,” replied the unfeeling barber, “get
a box.”
A city gentleman was enjoying a visit from a
country friend. As they went about certain er
rands in the business portion of the city, the coun
try friend, in order to save time and exertion, would
cut across the street or walk down the middle of
it; disregarding the more dignified custom of wait
ing until the corner was reached and using the reg
ular crossing-way. The city gentleman, seeking to
convey a slight intimation that this was not con
sidered entirely good form, remarked: “They say
that only dogs and Virginians cut across the street
in the middle of the block.” The country friend
replied serenely: “Well, I’m the Virginian, all
right! ”
It ■
We have always been of the opinion that even the
profession of journalism would be elevated if its
members would cut out tobacco and liquor. Wit
ness the following offer from a gentleman who com
piles the News Letter from Deer Lodge, Tenn.:
“For $650 I will learn anyone the printing busi
ness (one at a time) and all about how to run a
country local newspaper. You learn right here at
the News Letter office. If you are careful, conscien
tious, intelligent, with a good education and a
taste for the fine arts, and all the better if you
use neither tobacco or liquor, I can learn you in six
months’ time and practice so you can warrant your
self by your own merits to run a good paper or se
secure a first-class position on weekly or daily at
from sl2 to $lB per week, and soon make your mon
ey back.”
It seems like a big order though, to demand that
any one man be “careful, conscientious and
have a taste for the fine arts.” And wouldn’t it
be well enough if he have some knowledge of
poultry raising?
It has been frequently stated that “the world
do move.” The item we copy from the Philadel
phia Ledger seems to go far toward proving it. This
is it:
“Announcement was made to the parishioners
of St. Casimir’s Church today by the new parish
priest that Bishop Beaven had turned down their
application to have the auditing committee for
church funds, but instead had ordered that cash reg
isters be installed in the church.
“The registers will be placed at all the church
entrances before next Sunday, and then the church
goers may drop their dimes at the door, paying
as they enter and see their money rung up. In this
way the bishop expects to do away with the tangles,
financial and otherwise, in which the new priest
found the affairs of the church on his arrival here
a week ago.”
We wonder if the janitor is the one who will be
entrusted with the job of “ringing up” the contri
butions.
“The young people of the Christian Church or
ganized a Christian Endeavor Society Thursday
evening. The following officers were elected: Miss
Stella Freeman, president; Miss Mallie Freeman,
vice-president; Miss Lucy Freeman, secretary; Paul
Freeman, assistant secretary; Nellie Freeman, chor
ister; Mabel Freeman, organist; Oscar Freeman,
treasurer.” —The Champaign (Ill.) Daily News. It
seems like the whole dear family was initiated into
membership and office at once, doesn’t it?
TWO DOLL ATS A TEAK.
TIVE CENTS A COPT.
