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jenkinscountytimes.com The Jenkins County Times Wednesday, December 18, 2024 - Page 13
Christmas fishing, A tale
of a whale
You’ve probably heard the story of Jonah and the Whale.
Classic, right? Well, buckle up, because my Christmas fish
tale rivals Jonah’s aquatic adventure—minus the whole
being-swallowed-alive thing. Let’s dive in.
The year was 1986—a fabulous year, if I do say so
myself. I was fishing solo on Clark Hill Lake, enjoying the
serene December vibes. Back then, we owned lakefront
property, meaning I could fish whenever the mood struck
me (and it struck often). On this particular day, my wife
and kids were nowhere to be seen. It was just me, my boat,
and the crisp, cold air. Pure bliss.
There I was, whistling away like some lakeside
Pied Piper, when I felt it—a tug on the line so fierce it
practically yanked me out of my seat. I started reeling with
all the gusto of a contestant on a game show. Whatever
was on the other end of that line wasn’t budging easily. I
figured it had to be a turtle. A really, really big turtle. Or
maybe a small submarine.
I reeled and reeled, my arms starting to resemble
overcooked spaghetti, until finally, something massive
began emerging from the water. When I say massive, I
mean Moby Dick’s second cousin twice removed. This
thing was enormous. It wasn’t quite whale-sized, but for
a guy with modest upper-body strength, it might as well
have been.
It turned out to be a bass—a bass the size of a midlife
crisis. The scale must have thrown in the towel because
I’m certain this beauty weighed at least 50 pounds. After
wrestling it into the boat (and silently questioning my
life choices), I stuffed it into an ancient basket—the only
container remotely capable of holding something this big.
Now, with Christmas around the comer, I had a wild
thought: “Should I serve this Leviathan of a fish for
Christmas dinner?” But then sanity (and the fear of being
disowned by my turkey-loving family) kicked in. Fish
could be a side dish, maybe, but it wasn’t replacing the
main event.
Satisfied with my catch of the decade, I decided to call it
a day. As I zipped back to the dock, hunger gnawed at me.
All I could think about was a glorious bass feast. Arriving
at the dock, I began the delicate process of unloading my
prized catch. Naturally, I was still whistling—this time
“Santa Claus Is Coming to Town” because, well, it’s
catchy.
But then, disaster stmck. As I lifted the basket, the
bottom gave way like a cheap movie prop. My magnificent
bass—my whale, my pride and joy—flopped out and
plummeted back into the lake with a splash so loud it
probably startled fish halfway to Florida.
Turns out, the basket—a hand-me-down from my
dad—had spent so much time soaking in the water that
it had dry-rotted. Who knew? Certainly not me, the guy
who’d just lost Christmas dinner and a great story for the
grandkids.
The moral of this tale? Never tmst an old basket, don’t
count your bass before they’re battered, and maybe pick a
less jolly tune when handling slippery situations. After all,
nothing says “back to the North Hole” like a fish hearing
“Santa Claus Is Coming to Town” as it makes its great
escape.
So, from me and my family to you and yours, may your
Christmas be merry, your fish stay on the table, and your
baskets hold up better than mine did. Cheers to 2025!
Happy Trails!
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Georgia Issues First
Agricultural Water
Withdrawal Permits in
Lower Flint Basin in 10 Years
-Joe Brady, Editor
Governor Brian P. Kemp announced a major step forward for
Georgia’s agricultural community, as the Georgia Environmental
Protection Division (EPD) prepares to lift the 2012 suspension on
agricultural water withdrawal permits in portions of the Lower Flint
and Chattahoochee River Basins. Beginning April 1, 2025, farmers
in the region will be able to apply for new groundwater withdrawal
permits, marking the first such opportunity in over a decade.
The decision comes because of years of technical research
and planning by the EPD to balance the long-term sustainability
of Georgia’s water resources with the needs of farmers. The new
permits will include drought-related safeguards to ensure the
ongoing health of these essential water resources.
"As Georgia farmers continue to recover from the devastating
impacts of Hurricane Helene, I could not be prouder to deliver this
good news," Governor Kemp said. "I am grateful to the EPD for
their diligent and hard work in ensuring that our state is on a path
that protects both Georgia farmers and our water resources."
The original 2012 suspension was implemented to address
concerns about water resource depletion in the Lower Flint and
Chattahoochee River Basins. Since then, the EPD has conducted
extensive research to better understand the region's water systems.
In 2023, the EPD began exploring modifications to the suspension,
including limited permitting for frost protection in some areas.
These initial efforts, combined with years of data collection and
analysis, laid the groundwork for the newly announced changes.
“EPD is confident with these updated recommendations, as
our metering program has gathered extensive data strengthening
our technical understanding of surface water and groundwater in
the Lower Flint,” said EPD Director Jeff Gown. “The Regional
Water and Habitat Conservation Plans support existing water users,
including farmers, and set the stage to make room for new ones. We
look forward to working with all water users as they obtain these
newly developed permits.”
Starting April 1, 2025, farmers in eligible areas can apply for
groundwater withdrawal permits. These permits will include
drought-related measures designed to protect water resources
during times of scarcity. The permitting process reflects the
EPD’s commitment to ensuring that both water sustainability and
agricultural productivity can coexist.
This milestone comes as a relief to many in Georgia’s agricultural
community, who have faced significant challenges in recent years,
including extreme weather events like Hurricane Helene.
Georgia’s agricultural industry, which plays a vital role in the
state’s economy, depends on reliable access to water resources.
By lifting the suspension, the state aims to support farmers
while maintaining the integrity of water systems essential to the
environment and communities.
For more information on how to apply for water withdrawal
permits, visit the EPD’s website or contact the Georgia
Environmental Protection Division directly.
THE
P0ETS1_
CORNER’
Old Santeclaus
Old Santeclaus with much
delight
His reindeer drives this
frosty night,
O’er chimney-tops, and
tracks of snow,
To bring his yearly gifts to
Moore
The steady friend of virtuous youth,
The friend of duty, and of truth,
Each Christmas eve he joys to come
Where love and peace have made their home.
Through many houses he has been,
And various beds and stockings seen;
Some, white as snow, and neatly mended,
Others, that seemed for pigs intended.
Where e’er I found good girls or boys,
That hated quarrels, strife and noise,
I left an apple, or a tart,
Or wooden gun, or painted cart.
To some I gave a pretty doll,
To some a peg-top, or a ball;
No crackers, cannons, squibs, or rockets,
To blow their eyes up, or their pockets.
No drums to stun their Mother’s ear,
Nor swords to make their sisters fear;
But pretty books to store their mind
With knowledge of each various kind.
But where I found the children naughty,
In manners rude, in temper haughty,
Thankless to parents, liars, swearers,
Boxers, or cheats, or base tale-bearers,
I left a long, black, birchen rod,
Such as the dread command of God
Directs a Parent’s hand to use
When virtue’s path his sons refuse.
