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Wednesday, November 24,2021
dawsonnews.com I DAWSON COUNTY NEWS I 7B
FunSGames
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WELL, TIMMY, WHAT HAVE
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SUPERCOMPUTERS
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By DAVID
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Substance abuse pits family
members against each other
DEAR ABBY: I’m a
35-year-old woman whose
father refuses to get along
with me no matter how hard
I try. Our relationship was
always strained due to the
alcoholism he has struggled
with since my childhood,
made worse by the fact that I
became an addict. I’ve been
in recovery for a while, and
I’m clean and sober now.
He and my mother took
guardianship of my two
sons, ages 12 and 7, because
my disease rendered me
unable to care for them at
that time. I have mentioned
getting my kids back after I
acquire more clean time;
neither of my parents wants
that. I know Dad resents me
deeply, both because he has
my kids and also because of
my addiction.
If I can forgive him for
what his alcoholism has put
me through, why can’t he
forgive me? I don’t under
stand why he has to hate me.
Believe me, he HATES me!
I just want him to treat me
the same way he treats my
older brother and sister. I
need help with this situation.
Counseling is not an option;
I know he will refuse. —
HURTING IN MICHIGAN
DEAR HURTING: A
predisposition to addiction
can run in families. I suspect
that the person your father
hates is himself, and that he
saw a lot of himself in you
while you were using. That
you are now sober is a con
stant reminder of what a fail
ure he is, which may be why
he treats you the way he
does.
While counseling for him
may be out, it doesn’t mean
that you couldn’t benefit
from it. Please consider it.
Although it won’t make
your father love you, it may
help you to handle his
unpleasantness more effec
tively. Once you have accu
mulated more clean time,
regaining custody of your
children may become a via
ble option, and something to
DEARABBY
Jeanne Phillips
discuss with a lawyer at that
time.
DEAR ABBY: My wife
has started slurping her food
at dinner. I think it started
after we returned from a
vacation three months ago.
I’m convinced she didn’t do
it before then because we
have taken a couple of vaca
tions recently where it
would have been noticeable
because of the quiet, inti
mate places in which we
dined.
Because of the COVID
quarantine, I realize that ten
sions can be heightened, and
I have tried not to make too
much of this. I am reluctant
to speak up about it because
during my first marriage,
even the slightest noise
when eating would upset
my ex-wife, and I think it
would be unfair for me to
have the same pet peeve.
This may seem like I’m
overly sensitive, but her
slurping and heavy breath
ing every time she takes a
bite, even with dry food, is
making dinner time uncom
fortable for me. I have point
ed it out in a casual way, but
it seems she is unaware of
just how loudly she is eat
ing. What can I do to reach a
compromise on this? —
UNCOMFORTABLE
DINER
DEAR DINER: While
your sensitivity to this might
be related to the problems
you had with your first wife,
because this is a recent
change in your current
wife’s behavior, it should be
checked out by her doctor. I
am less concerned about her
“slurping” than about the
labored breathing you
described when your wife is
eating.