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DawsonOpinion
WEDNESDAY, MARCH 30, 2021
This is a page of opinion — ours, yours and
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What you need to do
M
SUDIE CROUCH
Columnist
Five words
can set my
teeth on edge
and make me
double down in
my stubborn
ness.
These words
are some of my
mother’s favorites, being
uttered quite frequently,
regardless of the situation.
Five words that even if
true, I will refuse to listen to
them because of their pushi
ness.
What you need to do.
These simple words are
often followed by whatever
my mother thinks I need to
do to solve my current and
ongoing predicament.
It doesn’t matter what that
predicament is, she has the
answer for it and it’s right at
the tail end of “what you
need to do.”
I don’t know about you,
but the minute someone
starts a sentence off with that
phrase, it wouldn’t matter if
they were giving me the
winning lottery numbers to
play or telling me how to get
a free Mercedes, my ears
would immediately shut
them out.
What is it about that
phrase that is so annoying?
Is it because it’s unsolicit
ed advice or is it because it’s
the truth we really need to
hear?
No matter what it is, those
words set my teeth on edge
and will make me do the
complete opposite, even if
the words were accurate.
“You never lis
ten to me,” Mama
chastised one day.
“Yes, I do,” I
replied. “I just
don’t do what you
tell me to; there’s
a difference.”
She made her
little “hhumph” noise that
makes her sound like a dis
gruntled cat, which would be
a fitting way to describe her
at times.
“That’s terrible. You
should listen to your mother,
and do what I tell you to do.”
“Maybe if you weren’t
always trying to tell me what
I need to do, I would listen.”
She made her little grunt
again. “I am just trying to
help you. Maybe I know a
thing or two.”
I rolled my eyes. She
always thinks she is right
and knows the steps I need
to take better than I do.
“She don’t listen either,”
Granny said. “Your grand-
daddy and I have told her a
million different things, but
she won’t listen to a lick of
it.”
“Really?”
Granny nodded. “She ain’t
never liked for someone to
tell her what to do, so I don’t
know why she goes and tries
to do that same thing to you.
She’d get her feathers all in a
ruffle whenever me or your
granddaddy would tell her
something.”
“So she got irritated when
y’all did the same thing?”
“Oh, heavens, yes. But
she’d do whatever the oppo
site was, probably out of
stubbornness and spite.” She
paused to look at me.
“You’re like her in those
ways. Just as stubborn and
spiteful.”
Funny. I thought I got
those personality traits from
Granny.
“But she wouldn’t listen.
No matter how right we
were.”
This was an interesting lit
tle insight.
My own mother didn’t like
to be told what to do, yet she
was always telling me what I
needed to do.
If she hated it so, why did
she do that to me?
Is that something that
many of us do without real
izing it? We inherit a paren
tal pushiness the minute we
become a parent and start to
tell our children what they
need to do.
Do we do the same thing
with our friends?
Granted, sometimes
friends may ask us for
advice and to join in our pity
party, but I don’t recall ever
telling them what I felt like
they needed to do in a given
situation.
Was this behavior, these
words, reserved solely for
offspring?
I wondered what made me
loathe these words so deeply.
Mama insists that she uses
them as a means of commu
nicating wisdom to help me.
I declare them dictates of
control - she wants me to do
what she thinks is best, not
what I want to do.
What you need to do.
Sure, it may seem like it’s
expert advice, but it’s not
wanted.
At least, not at that
moment.
It may be welcomed if it
was presented in another
way or with a better intro
duction.
Since she had felt the
same irritation with her own
mother, maybe she realized
when she got older that
Granny had been right about
a few things.
Was her turning of the
phrase her attempt at trying
to save me from making
mistakes and avoiding some
similar heartache or head
aches that she had experi
enced, simply out of bull
headed stubbornness?
Perhaps.
Our hindsight is always
20/20 and crystal clear when
we see someone else about
to take the same steps we
have.
While listening to my son
tell me about something he
was doing, I was thinking of
how I had been in a similar
situation before and what
happened. He needed my
guidance and insight at this
very moment. I knew how to
deal with this situation and
what his next steps needed to
be.
“What you need to do-” I
caught myself.
I, for one, know better.
Sudie Crouch is an award win
ning humor columnist and
author of the recently e-pub-
lished novel, "The Dahlman
Files: ATony Dahlman
Paranormal Mystery."
Russians share
their thoughts
on Ukraine
Linden
Longino is a
retired Atlanta
banker who
should have
Nobel Peace
Prize recipient
next to his name.
In 1995, Longino
started a program in connection with the
Carter Center called International Paint Pals,
an idea simple, ingenious and oh-so needed
inspire children to promote peace, friend
ship and human rights by creating personal
artwork.
Since its inception, International Paint Pals
has involved more than 200,000 kids, ages 5
to 19 from over 125 countries. Their art has
been displayed in venues around the world
including universities, museums, Nobel
Peace Summits and Olympic Games.
His organization was considered for the
Nobel Peace Prize in 2020. In my opinion, no
one was more deserving.
I have seen examples of the works from
young people of all races and religions from
across the globe, all creatively expressing
their hopes for peace on Earth through their
art.
Longino describes his organization’s mis
sion this way: “Children everywhere have
natural seeds of tolerance and peace in their
minds and hearts. Our goal is to nourish these
seeds.” In other words, let’s teach them to
love before they learn to hate.
Currently, he has a group of young people
making Welcome Cards for Ukrainian cancer
patients who are arriving at St. Jude
Children’s Cancer Hospital in Memphis.
Unfortunately, for Vladimir Putin art is
about the art of war, a feeling not necessarily
shared by the Russian people. In the midst of
the invasion of Ukraine, Longino told me he
had reached out to several Russian friends
who had assisted him over the years with his
International Paint Pals work.
“Since Putin invaded Ukraine a month
ago,” he said, “ I have been in regular email
contact with eight of them — good people in
a desperate country taken over by an evil
president. One asked me to let my friends
here know their feelings, and I want to honor
that request with you.” And I, in turn, share
with you.
The group consists of eight men and
women ranging in age from 39 to 75, all
involved in Russia’s arts industry. Seven live
in St. Petersburg and one in Rostov-on-Don,
only 400 miles from Russia’s border with
eastern Ukraine, which Longino says is “ter
rifyingly close if the bombed Ukrainian
nuclear power plant had exploded and may
still.”
Here are some excerpts from their com
ments to him: “ Unfortunately, I cannot tell
you all I think via email. I believe you know
what I meen (sic.) It is like one brother comes
against other one. Believe me, I would be
happy out of this country, but I am stuck
here.”
“Today I met with a business partner who
is from Ukraine. I had never met her before. I
do not know anything about her life. But we
hugged and cried together. We are all the
same.”
“It is very sad and troubling time indeed.
The work of our Art Institute in St. Petersburg
is stopped. I hope so very much that peaceful
solutions will be found very soon.”
“Hope these terrible times will finish as
quick as it’s possible. And we will meet again
in free and peaceful world.”
“The world’s got absolutely mad, mad,
mad, mad! But we do believe that reason will
prevail and common sense will make people
stop fighting against each other.”
“It is a pity that today humanity has lost the
qualities that man was originally endowed
with. And it’s only getting worse.”
“I am clearly understand that if some coun
try will use nucliar (sic)weapon it is the end
of the world. The main thing right now is to
stay calm and believe in friendship and
peace.”
“I seriously think about escaping from
Russia, but where and how is really serious
question for us.”
To Longino’s dismay, one correspondent
has bought into Putin’s propaganda that he is
getting rid of Nazis who control Ukraine.
“I know that the media are trying to portray
Russia as an aggressor. Russia has to fight
against Nazism which flourishes in Ukraine
thanks to the support of the West.”
There is always one in every crowd.
Vladimir Putin was bom in 1952, 43 years
before the formation of International Paint
Pals. You have to wonder what the world
might be like today if as a child, Putin had
been inspired by someone to create and share
with the world his own personal artwork pro
moting peace and friendship. It is Linden
Longino’s hope that we will never have to ask
a question like that in the future.
You can reach Dick Yarbrough atdick@dick-
yarbrough.com; at P.O. Box 725373, Atlanta,
GA 31139; online at dickyarbrough.com or on
Facebook at www.facebook.com/dickyarb.
LETTERTOTHE EDITOR
Proposed Legislation
Given the disastrous results emanat
ing from some well-intentioned federal
legislation in the past, I have a propos
al. The US Congress should create and
fund a Commission on Unintended
Consequences (CUC). This commis
sion should be an independent body
charged with the responsibility of care
fully reviewing all proposed legislation
in an effort to better identify unintend
ed consequences that often emerge
long after passage of the legislation.
History has clearly shown that numer
ous negative and often debilitating
consequences have arisen from the
passage of previously well-intended
legislation.
Currently, “Congress passes broad
laws and cedes the implementation
details to agencies staffed with subject-
matter and technical experts.” The
issue of a cost/benefit analysis by the
Congress or the affected federal agen-
cy remains murky at best.
Unfortunately, the current process has
proven to be largely inadequate. A dif
ferent process is needed, in my opin
ion.
Raymond Busbee
Dahlonega
Everybody Carry?
A bunch of states have been passing
“constitutional carry” laws and it looks
like Georgia will shortly join them.
That means that any adult without
some sort of legal record can go about
with a pistol hidden on their person.
There will be no requirement for a spe
cial carry permit.
In the beginning of the country there
were no laws regulating concealed
carry. After the civil war some southern
states were the first to began to prohibit
concealed carry but the reasons were
not plainly stated. You can probably
guess.
So why is this happening today?
Why is there a need to go armed every
where for self protection? And if you
believe the data, why are so many
women arming up and going to pistol
shooting schools? Those are really
interesting questions.
Some will say that the crime data
does not justify this. Some think it is
driven by social media. Some say it is
the constant violence of the movies and
TVs.
My opinion, unsubstantiated by any
expert, is that most people know the
federal judicial system has failed them.
The accumulative body of law, decided
over by federal judges for years now,
has prevented local state law enforce
ment systems from incarcerating or
executing the repeat violent offenders
who pray upon the rest of us daily.
Repeat violent offenders are being
turned loose to do it again and again.
This is not a problem of the police
man’s making. It is naive judges, most
ly federal, who live in some sort of
fairy tale world.
In response, because there does not
seem to be any other way, every citizen
is now going to be allowed to become
their own armed protector. State legis
lators are removing any impediment to
arming and carrying. Time will tell of
the wisdom of these steps.
My advice is that if you are going to
go about with a pistol take some class
es from someone who knows gun safe
ty. Learn how to shoot and hit. Know
the law about the use of deadly force.
Practice is the key to safety and com
petency. Learn to avoid those situations
where you may need to shoot. Be
aware and suspicious in your surround
ings. Always have an escape plan.
Please do not have accidental dis
charges. You may hit the innocent, or
worse, me.
Gary Pichon
Marble Hill
DICKYARBROUGH
Columnist
