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About The Georgia bulletin (Atlanta) 1963-current | View Entire Issue (Aug. 24, 1989)
PAGE 8 — The Georgia Bulletin, August 24,1989 Family For A Troubled Time Helping Pregnant Girls Make It BY RITA McINERNEY Earlier this month Pam and Rich Fagan found themselves in a rare situa tion. Their sons, Patrick, nine, and Colin, seven, were off to camp for two weeks. The pregnant teenage girl stay ing with them had given birth and returned to her family. “It’s the first time Rich and I have been without children in the house in nine years, since we had our first child,” Mrs. Fagan explained. The Fagans are a host family for Crisis Pregnan cy and Adoption Services, an agency of Catholic Social Services. In four years they have welcomed seven pregnant girls, 14 to 21, to their Vinings home. “They provide uncondi tional love from the beginn ing,” Mary Walsh said. A counselor with Crisis Pregnancy, she works closely with the Fagans. “They make no judgments, give birth support. They are very much role models. The girls can relate to them as peers.” The Fagans became in terested when Rich brought home a bulletin from Holy Spirit Church which carried an appeal for families. They contacted Sister Mary Jacobs, CSJ, then in charge of Crisis Pregnancy, and she came out to talk with them. “We became concerned when five or six months passed and we hadn’t heard anything. We wanted to get involved,” Pam Fagan recalled. Then Sister Mary brought a young girl and her family to their home to talk with them. That was the begin ning. Four years later, their dedication to support ing troubled young girls during pregnancy is un diminished. The decision to stay with the Fagans is made after the girl and her family visit them for a “get ac quainted” meeting. The girls are usually terrified over what’s happening to Celebration Honoring Mary To Hear Bishop San Pedro Most Rev. Bishop Enrique San Pedro, SJ, auxiliary bishop of Galveston-Houston, will give the homily at the annual arch diocesan celebration honoring Our Lady of Charity on Sunday, Sept. 10 at 1:30 p.m. at the Cathedral of Christ the King. Our Lady of Charity, La Virgen de la Caridad del Cobre, is the patron saint of Cuba. According to Cuban church history, the “black virgin” appeared in the 17th century to three fishermen caught in a storm in Nipe Bay. Her message to them was that her Son came to preach love. Pope Benedict XV proclaimed Sept. 8 the Feast of the Virgin of Charity on 1916. The date was chosen because it com memorates the birth of the Blessed Virgin. The cathedral celebration on Sunday, Sept. 10, will include a rosary procession in Spanish. A reception will follow at the Hyland Center. Bishop San Pedro was born in Havana, Cuba, on March 9, 1926. He entered his order as a novice in the Jesuit residence in Havana on Dec. 7,1941. After a few years, he was sent to Spain to continue his studies and from there to the Philippines, where in 1957, he was ordained to the priesthood in Baquio. He taught at a seminary staffed by the Jesuits in Dalat, Vietnam and later went on to study at the Pontifical Biblical In stitute in Rome and Jerusalem. In 1965, while in Vietnam, Father San Pedro was awarded his doctorate in sacred theology. By this time he was fluent in Spanish, French, English, German, Italian, Viet namese and Latin. On April 1,1986 he was appointed bishop by Pope John Paul II. Before his appoint ment, Bishop San Pedro had dedicated himself to the formation of seminarians by teaching as a professor in Spain, Vietnam, Dominican Republic, Fiji Islands and Florida, U.S.A. He was consecrated bishop in Houston, Texas, on the feast of St. Peter, June 29, 1986, by Bishop Joseph A. Fiorenza, of Galveston-Houston and also was named vicar of the Hispanic community. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$ Mortgage Loans Been turned down! 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Most are like a big sister to them.” “You’ve got to love them, feed them, give them shelter. It’s most impor tant to love them without judgment,” she said. “Many come with guilt. They don’t want their sib lings, their friends, their church or neighbors to know. The most over whelming sense of guilt comes when they realize 'What am I doing to my family?’ ” The Fagans’ total focus is family, their children and others. Rich coaches Little League and basket ball and they helped organize the Children’s Friendship Project for Northern Ireland. One Summer they entertained four youngsters from that strife-ridden country. Over three years they’ve en joyed having eight Irish children in their home. “A private room is a must” for the young girl awaiting the birth of her child, according to Pam Fagan. “They need a place for their own space. They spend a good amount of time thinking. And we spend a lot of time talking.” One of the seven young girls they have sheltered kept her baby. “Another kept hers for a short time, but realized she couldn’t parent,” Mrs. Fagan said. The Fagans find the girls add a lot of the household. She, a native of Texas, had two brothers but no sister. Rich, an attorney, is from New York. He had three brothers and a sister. Some of their girls had considered abortion. “But they realized that was the easy way out. All of them have been strong enough and moral enough to realize they couldn’t live with themselves if they did. By having the baby they have not chosen the easy way but the hardest way HAS SOCIAL SECURITY TURNED YOU DOWN FOR DISABILITY? CALL 371-8233 CYNTHIA L. HORTON. ATTY HOST FAMILY — Rich and Pam Fagan are shown with their sons, Colin, left, and Patrick, right, in photograph taken about two years ago. they could go,” she said with admiration. The girls, mostly middle class, white and black, have come from several areas around metropolitan Atlanta. Three have been from more distant places. “The only thing I expect them to do is keep their room and bath clean. I do the vacuuming for them. Often they ask if they can help me start dinner." Life in the Fagan household is “not very structured,” she admitted. Neighborhood young people are in and out during college breaks and summer vacation and there is always activity in the downstairs playroom. Do the girls remain in contact after they leave the Fagan haven? “I keep in touch only if they want to keep in touch. As much as I love them, I don’t feel they should have to carry friendship over if they don’t want to. Often they want to put this period out of their mind,” the outgo ing young mother recog nized. “Once they leave and start back on their feet physically and emotional ly, they want to close on that period of their life. The parents call and keep me abreast. I appreciate that. You can’t have a person live with you without becoming part of the fami ly. And it’s wonderful to see them get on with their lives.” When the girl gives her baby up for adoption she can return to the Fagans for a time to get her life back in order. “It’s hard for them, like dealing with a death,” Mrs. Fagan said. “We tell them Mary (Walsh), Rich and I are here to give you what you need. It’s OK, you’re ex pected to grieve.” Ms. Walsh, she said, is warm and loving, yet firm with the girls. “They can relate to her, they can talk to her.” Pam Fagan is convinced of the value of host homes. “The Catholic Church needs people, their time, support and money. Anyone who has the time and the room will find it can’t do anything but enrich their lives and the young girl’s. We have loved the girls and getting involv ed in their lives has enrich ed our family,” she said. “When you see them resume their lives, get back into school, you can’t help but feel that you had a small part.” Mrs. Fagan is eager to see more people involved with Crisis Pregnancy. “We need people who have background in counseling to get involved in helping the parents cope. We need people to take the girls to their doctors’ appoint ments. There’s an incredi ble amount of time spent there and getting there. Is there someone out there with Lamaze training, an RN, to talk to the girls? Videotapes don’t answer the questions they have and the doctors don’t have time.” “I can help the girls because I’ve given birth,” she went on. “They need someone to be there to calm their fears, answer questions.” Her eyes mist as she goes on. “I think about them going through this as teenagers. They need support so desperate ly. They need to be fully aware of all the options. If more girls knew they had this option, there would be fewer abortions.” The Fagans have a basic, sound reason for devoting so much of themselves to young girls who come into their lives. She puts it in loving terms. “Children are our passion. Whatever you have to do to give them a chance, you do.” This is the third and last article on what aid the Catholic Church in Georgia is offering pregnant women.
