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OPINIONS
Monday, March 30, 1998
THE MAROON TIGER
PAGE 10
Are You Eligible for a Five-Finger Discount?
By Matt Collins
Guest Commentary
Let's be real. How many
times have you slipped that
pack of gum, candy bar, or
anything else that is small
enough to be concealed in
your pocket and "forgot" to
pay for it? How many of you
"forgot" to tell a grocery store
cashier that you had a 24-pack
of Coca-Cola or beer hidden
cleverly out of sight under
your grocery cart?
How many of you partied
at the Warehouse all night and
missed the last shuttle, so you
and your boys called a cab and
ran like hell when it was time
to pay the fare? How many of
you have a fiendish plan to
sneak into Lane or Chivers
Hall down packed? If you can
answer any of these questions,
then you are a shoplifter.
On a higher level, how
many of you ever thought
about housing that phat FUBU
hoodie from Champs? Have
you candidly thought about
sticking up Stegall's or one of
the local BP's to pay off your
negative balance so that you
can register? Did you wish
they didn't have chains on the
computers in the Sale and
AT&T labs? If you can answer
any of these questions, then
you have the potential to be a
shoplifter.
How many of you hold
down a tight job in Lenox or
Cumberland Mall and have
sold over $500 in merchandise
to one of your peeps for 50
bucks that you eventually
pocket? How many of you
ever made bootleg concert
tickets at Kinko's that you sold
to innocent bystanders for
profit? How many of you got
stupid with a credit card that
you "accidentally" got in the
mail? If you answer any of
these questions, then consider
yourself a booster.
Let's face it, everybody
steals. This is definitely not a
good thing, but with the high
cost of Morehouse tuition
accompanied by the reccuring
Bell South bill, there are few
other alternatives. Some might
say "get a job." I've done that,
but decided it was time to quit
when store inventory rolled
around. Some of us shoptlift
without even knowing it, like
when you order a pizza and
tell them you have a coupon
that you know you don't have.
Or when you shake that
vending machine for dear life
so that you can get that loose
bag of Doritos. And when you
are supposed to put a token in
the slot at the MARTA station,
not a penny, but then pull the
bar back and slip right
through.
But with every action
there is an equal and opposite
reaction, and you may find
Hecklings and Fabricated Apologies
By Sterling Taylor
Staff Writer
Something took place at
this year's Founder's Day
Crown Forum that shocked
and embarrased me more than
anything has since I've been a
student here. Keynote speaker
Herman Cain, president of the
National Restaurant
Association, was treated to
shouts of "shut-up!" and
"booo!" that could be heard
coming from the balcony.
The culprit was ignored
by Cain and Dr. Massey, who
was also served to a round of
"boo!" The noise was
tolerated by members of the
faculty on stage but their
discomfort showed in the way
they shifted in their seats.
Perhaps this person had
some unresolved issues with
Dr. Massey, but they certainly
wouldn't have been resolved
in a situation such as the one
he created. He must have been
bored with the ceremony, so he
decided to interrupt it as a
means to speed it along a little
bit.
If he rationalized either of
the reasons I've mentioned, it's
obvious that he's not too
bright, especially if he thought
he could achieve anything
positive. But I don't think any
student at this school is
dimwitted enough to believe
that. To say so would be an
insult to me as well as most
other students. It would place
us all on the same level of
intelligence as such a person,
since we were all accepted to
this school under the same
criteria.
I don't know what
prompted this person to act
the way he did. The most
likely answer could be that he
simply lacks something that I
believe a "Morehouse-Man"
should possess. In a word,
civility, or as most people call
it, home-training. People who
lack this social grace don't say
"excuse me" when they bump
into you. They yell out in
Crown Forum and Freshman
Assembly, and if it causes a
disturbance, they definitely
don't apologize for it.
But wait a minute.
According to Dr. Massey at the
following Crown Forum,
that's just what this person did
in two drafted letters, one to
Dr. Massey and one to Cain.
The letters were signed, sealed
and delivered to the President
the next day. This hardly
seems in line with the
character of a person who
would yell "shut-up!" during
one of the most important
annual assemblies of the
school year.
Maybe he fell and hit his
head as he left King's Chapel
and had an epiphany that
made him see the error of his
ways. Maybe his roommate
gave him a shot of civility as
he slept that night. Or maybe
he left Crown Forum
unharmed, and slept that
night untouched, not giving a
single thought to what
happened that day. Maybe the
letters were fabricated.
Why would the
administration do such a
thing? It all has to do with
maintaining the image of
Morehouse College. A phony
letter sent to Cain would
quickly erase the bad
impression that his alma mater
is being run further into the
ground every time a new class
steps foot on campus. In the
students' eyes, an apology
letter would let them know
that no matter how much
trouble one individual causes,
he will be quieted and made
an example of. If the
administration doesn't get to
you, then your conscience will.
If the scene caused by the
rude person injured my sense
of brotherhood, then the
administration added to it by
insulting my intelligence. As
Dr. Massey stood behind the
podium, waving the apology
letter in the air for everyone to
see (but not too closely) there
was only one person that was
more stunned by disbelief
than I. He probably thought
to himself, "I didn't write no
damn letter." But he couldn't
say a word.
yourself suffering the than the law.
consequences for such actions, So after reading this
whether it is getting fired, column, I must ask you this
prosecuted, or getting jacked question: "Are you a
yourself. Play it smart shoplifter, potential shoplifter,
brothers, and remember: No or a booster?" I know I am.
matter how good you think
you are, you are never smarter
SGA President Responds to a Critic
As I opened my copy of the last issue of The Maroon
Tiger, I was shocked by Mr. Dante Wormley's accusations of
the Pre-Alumni Association (PAA). I would first like to
commend Mr. Wormley on his concern for the student body.
I would encourage everyone to participate in all facets of
the Morehouse community, including
its criticism. However, I will not
support such a slanted account of the
PAA's appropriation of funds to
attend the UNCF [United Negro
College Fund] conference.
First, I must defend my
colleagues in the Senate: Steven
Schukie, the President of the Senate,
and Senator Ike T. Ummanah. The
duty of our senators is to represent
clubs and lobby for their clubs'
interests. By contrast, the duty of the
senate leadership is to not only manage the funds of the
senate with financial acumen, but also to make decisions
Sellars
The PAA wanted to fly to the UNCF Conference while
other members from the AUC community arranged
transportation via bus. The PAA also proposed that their
twelve members be lodged in the Adams-Mark Hotel, which
is equal to the Ritz-Carlton. Is that not self-serving, Mr.
Staunch Critic? The Adams-Mark is a hotel for a honeymoon,
not for students attending a conference. The leadership of
the Senate denied this extravagant request with the best
interest of the student body in mind. I applaud their resolve.
I must also address the grossly incorrect information
that was presented to the Morehouse community about SGA
expenditures for the "Candle in the Dark" Gala. The SGA
purchased 30 tickets and distributed them to outstanding
The tickets were distributed to members of our
