Newspaper Page Text
Rarely used separation rite
frees widow from the past
by Ben Gallob
JTA
The reader who knows what the
Hebrew word chalitza means knows
something about a procedure in
Jewish religious law that is un
known to most American rabbis,
particularly Orthodox rabbis.
It came into the life of Karen
Winkleman of Berkeley, Calif.,
whose husband died suddenly three
years ago, a disaster from which
the widow emerged with a convic
tion she would never marry again,
according to the Northern Cali
fornia Jewish Bulletin.
But such wounds do heal and
last April, the widow and a suitor,
Bruce Furman, began to discuss
plans for a wedding, setting a date
for July.
Karen Winkleman and Sandy
Trachtenberg were married in 1974
in an Orthodox ceremony. Because
the couple had no children, when
the husband suddenly died, Karen
was tied to her husband’s brother,
according to Jewish religious law.
Even though her brother-in-law,
Aron Trachtenberg, had been mar
ried for several years, Jewish law
decreed that, until he married her,
or released her to marry again, she
could not remarry without under
going an obscure and ancient cere
mony—chalitza. At the unveiling
of Sandy Trachtenberg’s headstone,
the rabbi told Karen she would
have to go through chalitza before
she could marry again.
Knowing that in the American
pattern of voluntary Jewish com
mitments, she could ignore that
warning, she decided nevertheless
to undergo chalitza for several rea
sons: religious, emotional and psy
chological.
Karen then discovered that it is a
rare event for a 33-year-old Ameri
can Jewish woman to go through
the rite. Most Orthodox women
widowed at her age are not childless.
She sought advice from the rabbi
who married her, from rabbis in
the Bay area and from rabbis in
Los Angeles. A call for informa
tion through a national computer
bulletin board produced a three-
page print-out from a Yeshiva Uni
versity law student in New York
City. That analysis confirmed what
she had been told—without going
through chalitza, she could not
marry again. But the local rabbis
told her the only competent rabbis
were in Boston and New York.
She arranged for the ceremony
to take place in Boston. The rite
took place before a Beth Din, with
several rabbinic observers. Six
rabbis were present; one was the
official overseer, and two were
witnesses who watched each step in
the rite, which is detailed in Deu
teronomy.
Even the Boston Beth Din needed
time; its rabbinical members had
not witnessed a chalitza in many
years. The rabbinic judges also had
to obtain the traditional shoe re
quired by the rite. That shoe was
strapped on the brother-in-law’s
right foot, using prescribed knots
and crossovers.
Then the widow and her broth
er-in-law repeated words as instruc
ted by the rabbis. The brother-in-
law said he did not want to take
Karen as his wife and she said her
brother-in-law refused to marry
her.
She then untied the ceremonial
sandal and threw it as hard as she
could, past several open doors in
the Beth Din headquarters. She
then had to spit twice on the rug of
the rabbinical court. The rabbis
then declared: “Aron Trachtenberg
will be known as a man whose shoe
was loosened.” When the rite—fee:
$450—was over, Karen was pres
ented with a halachic document
that freed her from her brother-in-
law.
She said that immediately after
the rite was completed, the attend
ant rabbis turned to her, express
ing concern “about my physical
and emotional well-being, because
they realized this was a sad thing I
had to go through.”
Karen said she did not see the
rite as completely a sad event, nor
degrading because she was required
to kneel in front of her brother-in-
law.
"1 saw it on several levels,” she
_/the —"L
Classic Collection
SPRING & SUMMER
CLEARANCE
Better Knitwear for the
Classic Woman
Sizes 6 to 18
30% .o
OFF
220 Sandy Springs Circle
Springs Festival
Atlanta, Ga. 30328
(404) 256-4847
Mon.-Sat. 10-6
60%
said. “First was on the religious
level. 1 may become Orthodox, or
make alivah and the issue may
come (up) and my (upcoming) mar
riage would not be legal. 1 am con
cerned about our future children
and did not want them to have any
repercussions from the past, nor
did I want my (second) marriage
questioned legally,” in Orthodox
terms.
No less important, Karen ex
plained, was that the chalitza was
“a physical break with the Trach
tenbergs. They had been a part of
my life every step of my life,” both
as a wife and a widow.
“This was the final chapter of my
life as a Trachtenberg. It separated
me and gave me distance from the
past. Now 1 can start again because
the ceremony put a closure on one
part of my life and left open a
whole new future,” she declared.
NOW OPEN
ON
SUNDAY
12 p.m. to 6 p.m.
Shampoo • Cut • Blow Dry
$10 00
Men’s Wet Cut and Blow Dry
$8 00
Permanent (includes cut)
$35 00
Shampoo, Cut, and Set
$16 00
Hours:
Monday-Friday
8:30 a.m.-8:00 p.m.
Saturday
8:30 a.m.-6:00 p.m.
Hair Stylist
Toco Hills Shopping Center*2205 LaVista Rd., Suite C*633-3832
WEEKLY QUOTE FROM LESTER’S BOOKS
“Indecision is a lack of experience—avoid indecisive
actions—get experience through practice. ”
Lester Pazol
20 YEARS
HENNESSY ^adif&ic
CALL FOR A TEST DRIVE
JAGUAR
261-5700
CATERED SILVER SERVICE
FOR A THOUSAND OF
YOUR CLOSEST FRIENDS.
From dinner for fifty high above the
Atlanta skyline in the elegant Crown Room to catered kosher
for a thousand in the smashing new
Grand Ballroom, Colony Square Catering can handle it.
With creative consulting, delicious food and impeccable
service at your place or ours.
Call Wayne Adams or Larry Russell at 892-6000.
They’ll make your party marvelously memorable, no matter
how many friends you have.
COLONY SOLACE HOTEL I
PAGE 15 THE SOUTHERN ISRAELITE August 1, 1986