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■If + UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA LIBRARY 1 FilELf B 10 HEWS,” rouires in ) Mill UfflJKE. VOLUME I. , , ATHENS, GEOllGIA, THURSDAY MORNING. JANUARY 25, 1855. NUMBER 43 PUBLISHED WEEKLY, ' UY JOHN H. CHRISTY, EDITOR AUD PROPRIETOR, Tcrmi of Subscription. DOLLAR:* per annum, if paid itrietly in aU otherwise. THREE DOLLARS w ill be charred, order that the price ul the pa pel m ly n^tbelrt of a lartte,cireulati»n, flub* will be supplii d lluwinc tmv rates. - IX-UOIMES for - - - pjTlO, EN •• for - - - $15. .11 these low refer, the CSui most .fragmentary <fi>utlirrings. Bote* of AKwcrtfelng, Transient adrertisemente will befoserted at One Dollar per square f r the M. and Fitly Cents per ptpiare for e rh subsequent in*erti< n. LefaI ami yearly ail vertisenients at the tiaiial ratne Candidates will be charged R5 for announcements, and obilu irv n»lireaexeeeuing six lines in length wit: be charged as advertise enta. When the number of insertions is not marlcedon and adterlisemeni, it win be published till forbid, and char.usl accordingly. HARD TIMES. BT ALKRLD F. BCBSETl. A negro preacher referring to the Judgment,pay in his sermon, paid. * BreJren and sisters, in dal day de Lord shall di«jdc’ : ’de sheep from de r jmd brtf^jle Lo d, we know who wears de wool 1’ Kissing a pretty girl down South, a young gentleman asked her--* ‘ Wliat makes you so sweet V * Oh,’ she replied, in utter innocence, ( my lather is a sugar planter.’ * A Yankee,’ describing an opponment. says, • I tell you what, sir. that man don’t amount to a sum in oriihmetic ; add him up, and there’s nothing to carry P In order to do anything in this world worth doing, we must not stand shiver ing mi the hank and thinking of the cold and the danger, but jump in and scram ble through as well os we can. Haro Tiara is now on every lip. And breathed from every t<-oguc; Tim B niks are cursed by one and all, The aged and tlm young. Tbe mercbniit lias to clo.«e bis doors. Anil throw his ledger by ; Such times he vows were 'never seen, By any mortal eye. The shopmen quit the counter’s side, For customers are few. The times are now so very "tight' It makes them all look “ blue;” The citizen in vain essays To make more than his bread; A pound of which h • non' declares Won’t weigh a pound of bread! There’s not a day but some one fails, Some house that goes to smash; And names that once stood high on “ Change Are cut for want of Cash. Those whom we thought were millionaire*. And rich in shares and stocks. Their '-Million heirs' now disappoint; They fail and leave no “ Rocks.” “ Hard times ! hard tim s ! Was ever seen Such times as hard as these I” This is the cry from morn till night, In which each one agrees A remedy I think I've found. T Say. how do you think ’twill d«t J*‘ Pull off -your coat, roll up your sleeves, Aud work these hard Hates throughT* All Night We Stood. * All night we stood beside her bed, Ail sight with broken sighs. We sadly turned her aching head, Aud wished the morn would rise. Her little hands so thin and pale. Her eyes half closed with pain; Without 'be wailing autumn gale, Ami cAM September rain. The. great tree* rocking in the blast— Ah! -non it was alt o'er ; The little heart that bent so fast Could beat for us no more For ere the morn beams bad lent a Upon her little hand. She t>re ithed her last and softly went Into the belter land. A Stranger, passing through one of It won’t do to conclude that a man s the mountain towns of New England, always happy when he is smiling, or inquired, “ What can you raise here?* that . e is a housebuilder, because you The answer wus, “ we can raise but little always find him wish a “ brick in his produce, and so we build school houses, hat.” and raise men !” i . ™ r~,r~~ , - | There is a man in New York so op- “ Can you tell me,” asked a pundit, P° 5td to Catholicism, that he wonuravel “ why a conundrum that nobodv can on cross roads. He is the same man guess is like a ghost ?” “ Shall I tell * hal wont eat beef for fear that it might you now or next month ? ’ “ Now, if be a P° rt '°" ol the Pope’s last Bull, you please.” “ Well, sir. sooner or, Couiuers sleep on horseback; a cabman will drive while sleeping, and the exhausted soldier may fall asleep and still march on. iatereverybody must give it up.” - -- , I Is it not better that your friend tell you your faults privately, than your ene-, iny talk of them publicly. j Handsome features alone are as in- t ■ capable of expressing real beauty, as Somebody says very beautifully— speech alone is incapable of expressing “ As small planets are nearest the sun w j t> so arc little children nearest to God JfaUain}. “Gently the dews are o’er me steal ing,” as the man said when he had five Pride is as loud a beggar as Want, and a great deal more saucy. When you have bought one tine thing you must buy ten more dial all may he ol a piece. But poor Dick says, •' Ii is easier to suppress tlie-first desire than to satisfy all that follow it.” And it is as truly folly for die poor lo ape die rich, as liie frog to sw ell in order to equal the ox. Truk Love.—Simon seated beside bis sweetheart, tishing— r » Sally, I wish I was a fish and you was bait. Lordee, how l*d bite ?’ Solon made idleness a crime, and in sisted that each citizen should give an . due bills presented to him at once. account of the manner of getting his 7—7-—7—7-—7 — livelihood. All are ready to puni-h a bad action— few to reward a good one. Pete says that the ciphering book a n’t right when it says that •* two pints make one quart.” He says that daddy sells two or three quarts out of only one pint of pure liquor. Petes daddy must be a Son of Temperance, or lie wouldn't use quite so much water. There is an old lady in Troy so full of sympathy, that every time her ducks take 11 bath in the mud-pool, she dries •their feet by-the fire to prevent th< m catching cold. “ I am afraid you shall come to want,’ said an old lady to her daughter “I have come to want already,” was the reply,—“ 1 want u nice young man.” Why is a colt getting broke like a young lady getting married 1 Guv that up.— Kaze lie is going through the ‘bridal’ ceremony. “ Father.” paid a juvenile to his paternal guardian who had the had habit of alternating from piety to profanity, “I do think you ought to stop praying or sweariitg—I don’t care which.” TllE CALM OF DEATH. **The moon looks calmly down, when inan is The earth s - iil holds her way ; [dying. Flovver- breathe their p-riinue nnl the wind- keep sighing. None Sochi to j aiise or stay ” Clasp the hand* meekly over the still breast. ihe\ ’ve no inure work tod:>. Close the weary ey s, there are no more tears to shed; part the dan:p locks, there’s no more pain to bear. Closed j.- the ear ali'te to love’- kind voice and calumny’s Stineing whispers. Oh,it in that still heart yo i have, ruth le-s'y planted a thorn; if fiom that pleading eye you have turned carelessly • vay ; if your loving •.lince and kindly word and clasping hands have conic all tno late, then God forgive you ! No frown gathers on the niarlde brow as you gaze—no scorn curl- the chiselled li|»— no flush of wounded feeling mounts the blue veined temples. God forgive you! for your feel too niu*t shrill * appalled from death's cold river—your faltering longue nsks. ‘Can this be death T Your fading eye lingers lovingly on the sunny earth : your sink jug pulse gives its f.-eble flutter. O, rapacious grave! ye* another vic tim for thy voiceless keeping!—Wliat ! not a word of welcome from all the houseless sleepers ? no warm greeting from a si-ter’s loving lips ? no throb ul pleasure from the maternal bosom? Silent all! Oh! if these broken links were never gathered up—-if beyond death’s swelling . flood there was no elernal shore—if for ythe struggling bark there was no sort of • peace—if athwart (he lowering cloud sprung no bright hoiv of promise! Alan! lor lave—if this be all. And n.iught heyuud—ah, earth! A Dublin mercer, recommending a piec** ol silk} lo a lady for *a gown. said. * Madam, it will wear forever and muke * petticoat afterwards.’ * A young lady who took the eye of every^dy, has Leen arrested for steal- tag- / The way to make a tall man “••hort.” fe-to ask him to lend you a thousand dutbu*. r- .. ' Jt W chiefly young Indies of narrow aikder^taading who wear shoes too small for them. ^ \ V * v , flow extraorbinary it is that the Czar ‘ jn’il be in want of money after all »'<4ieefcs hi? hnv reecived. An extraordinary surgical operation was lately performed which killed the patient. The physician is doing well. It is said thai the application of ;ow- ds, wrung out in lint water, to 1 lie fore head and temples, is a speedy ami effica cious remedy for headaches arising from neuralgic nff ctions. ‘ Keep tour dug 11 way‘from me,’ said a dandy ;o a butcher buy. ' * He loves puppies, and a darn bit can I l.eep him away from them,’ said the boy. A gentleman who did not trust lo his memory, wrote in his pocket book. * I must be married win 11 I get to town/ A noted miser having relented so much ns to give a begsiar a sixpence suddenly dying soon after, the attendant physician gave it as his opinion that his death arose from enlargement of the heart! The name old lady u ho, on u troon shiny evening remar ed that it was a* light as a cork, in describing some hard swearing the oilier day. said the nmn swore a* hard as a rock. A lot of fellows went on a deer hunt llie oilier day in Arkansas, and in les than three hours captured five girls aud a woman. Wiiat Next,— We. notice by the New Orleans papers of Thursday, that the notorious ra-cal and pickpocket. Dr. Hines, who has just served out a year’s term in the Lousiana penitenitary, is de livering public lectures in New Orleans on the subject of *• Penitentiary Disci pline, &c;” tickets only fifty cents. Thi.« certainly beats Barnum’s bolde-t strokes of impudent humbug. Speaking of Uaruum, the Picayune says tlmt Hines has written a biography of himself, which he is desirous of publishing, and which if a truthful record, must equal in interest the recent work of the grea« show man. A striking instance of the pursuits ol pleasuie under difficulty, is seen when a bachelor joins a family parly to Bunkei Hill, and volunteers to tote a fat baby to the lop of the monument. How extraordinary is it that the Czar should be in want of money after all the checks he has received. Too Venturesome.—The man who caught a glance from the eye of beauty, -ays, that it slipped through his fingers, and went right through his heart, iutiict ing a da serous wound Edible Query.—What authorit% would he like to he mo-t in favor with a gourmand ? Crabbe, Lamb, Hogg,- and Bacon. To Remove Ink stai.. from Cloth. —The moment the ink is spilt, taken little milk and saturate the stain ; soak it up with a rag. a d apply a little more milk, ruhhing it well in. In a few minute-the ink will be completely re moved. Ignorant people are to be addressed through the eye. If you want to pas for a great man with a blockhead, sport a hundred dollar cloak and a fifteen dollar watch-key. An ignoramus thinks that he. alone lias» sterling* paits, who • X' ibils shirt-buttons made of bullion. Make a note. A Western editor thinks that Iliram- Powers, the sculptor, is a swindler, he cause he chisided an unfortunate Greek girl out of a block .of marble. THE WISDOM OF THE ANCIENTS. In a general sense it may safely be affirmed that the wisdom of the ancients was more moral and imaginative, ours more physical and demonstrative. All the great teachers of antiquity were moralists. In fact, philosophy it self was morality, the study of virtue, the art of moderating the passions, and cultivating the higher attributes of hu mnnity. To such a degree of enthu i- asm was this generous and self-denying spirit carried by the ancients, that many of them not only despised the wealth and luxuries of the world, but actually re fused to accept them, and freely distr - buted or threw them away, if thrust upon them. Diogenes lived in his tub, and bask ed in the sutishitie, like a vagrant who would be taken to tljp police station and punished by a modern magistrate for not having a home. He was a grea’ man even in that tub. and Alexander the Great—the hero of his day—accom panied tty his generals, did him the honor of paying htm a visit, and treating him with deference. Aristides was so poor —and voluntarily poor, tkat his family was left destitute, and his body was bu ried at the expense of the public. Soc> ales refused to take money for his. instructions, and died a pauper, leaving his wife and children to be supported by his friends—and worthy friends they were. A letter of Xenophon to Xantip- pe, the wife of Socrates, is still extant, and breathes such a spirit of pure and sublime •levotedness to the great teach er and his lessons'of virtue,, that we might search in vain for anything equal to it in modem times. “ Remember,” said Xenophon to the afflicted wife after the death of her hus band, “ what Socrates was wont to do and say, follow his pmc ice and preempts — Your excessive sorrow does hut wrong yourself and prejudice your children Consider that they are the ch ldreo of S, crates, and that we are not only ob liged to maintain them, but to preserve ourselves for their sakes, that may not want a guardian to support and protect them. I make it my study to live for them, which you will not do long if you do not abate your unavailing sorrow, and cherish yourself, and prejudice your children.” Appollodo us and Dion praise you for not accepting any thing from man. and for professing you are rich en ough and warn it not. It is well done, Xantippe. and depend on it that as I and Very just reasoning, which well ex poses the weak side of Cato, and ac counts for many of his vices and incon sistencies. If wealth is worth collecting it is certainly woith using We do not admire Cato’s turnip boiling and his kitchen practice, with so large an inheri tance as he was possessed of. If the wealth was not to be used by a vir.uons man, why did he not distribute it? His conduct looks like petty avarice.. We have more respect for Diogenes in his tub, or the proud Aristides, who was poor from choice. The Worcester Tianscript knows a man so mean, that he won’t draw his breath for fear that he will lose the interest. other friends of Socrates are able o Labor is a school of benevolence as well as justice. Next to virtue, let Anecdote of Trafalgar—When Nelson’s famous signal was given— •• England expects every man to do his duty”—two Scotchmen were standing on deck, and one polled a long sour lace, and said. “ Eh. handy, there’s naetliing ala ur pair old Scotland !” “ Hoot, moo !” >ai(l Sandy, ** Scotland kens weel her bairns always do their duty. It is only a hint to these Knglishers.” If th« Bible were a weekly journal, how many cmniunications would it re- ceit e signed, •* A con.-tan! reader." ~ R«*v Dr. Adams’ book entitled *• South Side View of Slavery,” is likely to do immense good in di>sem'niatitig/W/.s concerning the true condition of the Southern slave. A Boston corresjioiid- ent of tile Salem Register concludes .-o n-comments on the work by saying; •• With all detestation of slavery, I never 1 lion-lit myself a fanatic on the subject until row. But who of us L not ?” Most Horrible—A grocer’s wife having, in a passion, thrown an inkstand at her hu»buud. and spattered him all children be trained to industry, over with the black liquid, some s treci- ous wretch declared that she had been Brooklyn is now the third city in the engaged at the battle of ink-hcr-mun. Union, having a |M>pulati n of tWobun- Olt, dear, w hat will the world come to? dred thon-and inhabitants. Tliisart.-es — from the consolidation of the city of “ Why are you forever humming that Williamsl urg ai d the township of Bruns- atr?” asked Foot*, of a man without a wick with it. It extends seven and a <en-e of tune in Mtn. ‘'Because it half niih-s North and South, and over haunt* me.” “ Ni wonder” said Foote, five East and West. You are forever murdering it.” * ! The question has been asked why it is An apothecary asserted in a large con-idered t im|K>lite for gentlemen to go company, 'that all bitter things were into the presence of ladies in their shirt hot.” . sleeves,«hilst it i- considered in every “ No,” replied a physician, “a hitter way correct for lit • ladies themselves to cold day is an exception.” j appear before gentlemen without any — — j sleeves at all! A lady stsk* d a gentleman, who was j. suffering with the influenza : “ My dear 1 “ Samivel, bevnre of the vimmins as sir, what do you take’ for jour cold!’ reads no noosepaper. Your lather mar- - Ten pocket handkerchiefs a day, ma dam.” ried a voman what read none. An* you re j the ea«! koo-equin*. You’re as liignor • ent as an ’or.-e. II ignorant people say? Two men fired at an eagle at the same j j |OW j t ’ 5 thrown’ money away to take time and killed him. An Irishman ob- j noo cpapers an’ fooiin away time to read served; They miglrt have saved the powder iml shot, for the full would have killed him. “ Pin Money.”—It is reported, say.- a Boston paper, thf a lady in this city has spent, during the year 1 54. at a lace and embroidery store, the sum of $2,000. and that several ladies have e.icli contracted bills at the drv gm»ds stores varying fiom So,000 to 86,000 each.” A woman’s heart is like a fiddle, tequires a bow u> play on it. Talk nliout the enjoyment of wealth —it never was and never can he enjoy ed; An abundance of money is a heap i»r misery. A man who owns a small house, a small farm, a small wife, a big dug, a good cow, two or three fat pigs, mid three Children, ought to be well satisfied. »"■■■ An editor speaking of a womans rights’ convention, says— •* Persevere tadies—-petticoats will rise l»y and by." We once heard of a dog who had a whistle which grew on the end of his tail He fdtfavg called him'elf when wanted A Sharp Reply.—A beautiful wo man once said to General Shields, who by the by is an Irishman—' How is it. that having obtained so much glory you will seek lor more ?’ ‘ Ah. madam,’ he replied.‘how is it that you who have so much beauty, should still put on the paint.' The man who imagines himself wise becau*e he detected some tyjiograpltical errors in a newspaper, has gone East to get a perpendicular view of the rain bow. It is affirmed by scientific gentlemen that the pressure of the times, il it could lie used as a propelling power would force a vessel across the Atlantic in twenty-four hours. *• I do declare, Sal, you look pretty enuf to eat *’ Solomon ain’t I eatimr as fast as I can ” replied Sul, with her mouth full. A rather credulous individual on be ing told that he should not believe mow than half that he heard, asked: * wh^ half shall TtrcdSj-" . The number of Christian Jews in the world is estimated by one of their num ber at fifteen thousand, of whort*. K says, several hundred are in the United States, many of them occupying highly respectali.e positions, as merchants lefgytnen mid physicians. A Conven tion oK’ltrl-tian .lews is lo be held in New-Ybrk next May. The new State llonse at Sacramento. California, is a -piendid buildi ig &D by 20 feet, and cost the county nearly 8200,000. The Assembly Hall 7 by 43 leetf 20 feet high, and elegantly finished. ’Z vj A IIiGti Price,—The Red River so low that the freight on Cotion has risen to So a bale. The day aft* r twenty rogues had escaped from jail out west, an editor had an eloquent article jon the morals of the place. “ Not a prisoner within the walls nf thejaii.” — ft ——T Wants a Husband.—A young widow with 880,000 in Neiv York, ad vertises for a husband just, live feet ten inches in height. Nothing i-r snid about bwadth. ‘Why is it, my son, that when you drop your bread and butter, it is always the butter side down ?’ *1 don’t know. It hadn’t oughter, had it ? Tbe strongest ought to be uppermost, hadn’t it ma ? and this yere is the stron gest butter I ever seed !’ ‘IIu.-b up; it’s some of your aunt’s churning.’ ‘Did she churn it! The great lazy thing!’ ‘What, your aunt ?’ ‘No ; this yere butter! To make that poor old woman churn it, when it is strong enough to churn itself!’ ‘Be still, Ziba! It only wants work ing over.’ ‘Well marm, fies you, when I did it, I’d put in lots o’ molas<es !’ ‘You good for-nothing! I’ve ale a great deal worse in the most aristocratic New York boarding houses!’ ‘Well, people, o’ rank ought to eat it!’ •Why people o’ rank ?’ ‘Cause it’s rank butler/ ‘You varmin you! What makes you talk so smart ?* •The butter’s taken the skin off my tongue, mother!' ‘Ziba, don’t lie! I can’t throw away the butter. It don’t signify.’ ‘I tell you what I’d do with it marm. Pd keep it to draw blisters. You ought to see the flies keel over and die, as soon as they touch it !’ ‘Ziba. don’t exaggerate; but here’s twenty-five cents, go to tbe store and buy a i ound of fresh.’ Eclipses in the Year 1855.—There will be this year four eclipses,two of the sun, and two of the moon. The first, a total eclip e of the moon May 1st, at 10 o’clock, 28 minutes, in the evening, visible. The second, a partial eclipse of the sun, May 19th, at 9 o’clock 9 minutes in the evening—invisible here ; only vi sible towards the north pole, Greenland, and the north part of North America, latitude 60 and 61. The third, a total eclipse of the moon. But of course he does not say that this enormous area was occupied, or any thing like it; it comprised within the walls huge trrets of cultivated lands and gardens for supplying the population ; with food in the event of a siege. M« Oppert has discovered the Babylonia** and Assyrian measurers, and by many of them had ascertained exactly what part of the soil was inhabited and what part was appropriated for gardens. On the limits of the town, properly so-call-* ed, stands at present the flourishing town of Hillah. This town, situated on the banks of the Euphrates, is built with bricks from the ruins, and many of the household utensils and personal ornaments of its inhabitants are taken from them also. Beyond this town is the vast fortress strengthened by Ne- buchadnezzer and in the midst of it is the royal palace itself, almost as large as a town. M. Oppert says that he was also able to distinguish the ruins of the fa mous 'Tower of Babel; they are most imposing, and stand on a site formerly called Borsipa, or the Tower of Lan guages. The royal town, situated on the two banks of the Euphrates, covers a space of nearly seven square kilome tres, and contains most interesting ruins. Amongst them are those of the royal palace, the fortress, and the suspended gardens. In the collection of curiosi ties which M. Oppert has brought away with him is a vase which he declares to date from the time of one of the Chal dean sovereigns named Narambel; this is, somewhere about one thousand six hundred years before Jesus Christ: also a number of copies of uneiform inscrip tions, which he has every reason to be lieve that he will be able to decipher. maintain you, you shall need none be sides. Then he of good cheer and com fort yrurself. Behave yourself worthy of Socrates; and knowing as you do, what a great man he was, think upon his life and strive to forget his death ; though even that too. to such as consid er it a right, will appear most most glo rious and excellent. Chio, again, was a disciple of Xeno phon, and he says, in writing to his friend Matris, •* A philosopher will not despise that which consists in action, when oc- ca ion offers of being useful either to hi m?ei for others; and will acquit him self well, and conte off with honor in all that he undertakes. For if he can over come his passions, he can certainly be able to get the better of bis chetnics, which is a much easier conquest; for we see daily examples of conq terors, who fall a prey to lust and avarice. I hope, therefore that by the study of vir tue 1 sh ill become, not only a better man, but more bravr, too, thojghless cruel and vaingloriouia. ■■■■■pH! Such language in modern times would only excite the smile of derision. Mod cm- laugh at the idea of studying virtue It is exploded, with astrology, alcjiemy and the. black arts. We now study pbrenoh'gy, chemistry, meteorology and other matter bf-fact subjects. Vtr- tue! if you have a nose turn it up Plutarch was of opinion that many of the poor philosophers canted their love of poverty too far. Only think of a mod ern philo opher commit.ing such a blun der ! Plutarch does not much admire the elder Cato; however, for boasting of his simplicity of life, and at the same time carefully hoarding up the .pence.— Cato coaid make a delicious nteal on boiled turnip:-, and loved to boil them while his wife baked the bread. “ But yet,” says Plutarch, “ he would talk so much about a farthing, and the means of acquiring wealth ? Simplicity and frugality are only great when they fre-* the°nind from all desire and care about superfluities. I would fain ask Cato himself, “ If riches are not to be enjoyed why, when possessed of much he plumed himself upon being satisfied with so little ?”• If it be a commendable thing, as indeed it is, to he contented with coarse bread and -such wine as our ser vants and laboring pofiple drink, and not to covet purple and elegantly plastered homes, the ■ Aristides,’ Ep miinomlns. Matins, Currius, and Cains l’ ahricius, were perfectly riget in neglecting to acquire what they did not think pmper to use. gjjaKjjj October 25th, at 2 o’clock 35 minutes in the morning, visible. The fourth, u partial eclipse of the sun, November 9, at 2 o’clock 39 min COURTING IN CHURCH. An eccentric rector remarked a geti~ tleman at church who was not a parishio ner, but who Sunday after Sunday, plac ed himself in a pew adjoining that of a widow. On the first occasion he dtetec** ted him slyly drawing the lady’s glove off the back ol the pew, where she was accustomed to place it (Her hand and arm were delicately fair.) Bye-and-bye, the lady’s prayer book fell—of course accidentally—from the edge of her pew into the gentleman’s. He picked it up, found a leaf turned down ; and scanned a passage whic h evidently caused a smile of complacency. Otir minister saw all their movements, and continued to watch them with a scrutinizing eye, for two successive Sundays. On the third, as soon as the collects were read, and while the beadle yet obsequiously waited to conduct him to the chancel, our eccentric pastor, in a strong and distinct voice, said “I publish the banns of marriage be« tween M and H , (delibe* ute* in the afternoon; invisible here and rately pronouncing the names of the par- only visible at tbe south pole. | tj eS| j if an y of you know any just cause,’ ’ &LC. Like and Not Like.—A lawyer at Poughkeeps'e was applied to, one time by an indigent neighbor, for his opin ion on a point of law in which the in terests nf the latter were materially in volved. The lawyer gave his advice, and charged the poor fellow -S3 for it., “There is the money, said his client “it is all the money I have in the world and n y f imily I a* been a long time with out pork Thank God.” replied the lawyer, The eyes of the whole congregation were turned on the widow and the gay Lothario; the lady suffused with blushes, and the gentleman crimsoned with an ger; she fai.nittg herself with vehemence?, and he opening and shutting the pew door with rage and violence. The minister, meanwhile, proceeded through hi* ac customed duties, with the satn decorum and ease a.* if perfectly inhocentof the ag - tation he had excited. The M-rinbu preach ed and the service emled-away to the vest- “my wife never knew the want of pork . f ll>e iea at t! - a .. ;U of lhj since we were married.” I “Nor she never will,” rejoined the countryman tartly, “so long as she has such a hog as you are The lawyer was so pleased wi h the smartness of the repartee, that he for gave the poor fellow and immediately, returned hint his money. We believe all bnt the last part. ANCIENT BABYLON. It will' not be forgotten that the French Government, two or three years ago s»itl three gentlemen to make scientific and artistic researches in Me dia. Mesopotamia, aud Babylon. One of them, M. Jules Oppert, has just rc turned to Paris, and it appears from his report that he and his colleagues thought it advisable to the exploration of anci ent Baby'on. This task was of immense difficulty, and was enhanced by the ex cessive heat of the sun, by privations of all kinds, and by the incessant hostili ty of the Arabs. After awhile M. Op- pert’s two colleagues fell ill, so that all the labors of the expedition devolved on him. He first of all made excavat ions of the ruins of the famous suspended gardens of Babylon, Which are now . Known byahe name of the Hail of Am- widow. ran-ibn-AH ; and he obtained in them a T ‘ “ number of curious architectural and other objects, which are destined to be placed in the Lovrc at Paris. He has succeeded in making a series of minute surveys, aud in drawing up detailed plans of the immense city. His opinion is that even the largest calcula ti ms as to its extent are not exaggerat ed ; and he puts down that extent at the astounding figure of five hundred square kilometres, French measure, (the sq. kilometre is 1.196 sq. yds.) This ts very nearly eighteen timet the size of Paris. pastor. ‘Who HUthqriz* d you, sir, to muko uch a publication of bans T demanded they both in a breath. ‘Authorized me?’said he, with a stare tlmt hi ighn ned their confusion. •Yes, who authorized you ?' ‘Ou/ said the minister, with a sly lance alternately at each, ‘if you do not approve of it, I will forbid the baits next {Sunday/ ‘Sir,’ said the lady, ‘you liau- ben too officious already—nobody n quested yeti to do any smith thing-—yon had bcl- t« r mind your own business.’ ■Why, my ) retty dear/ said he, pn'- 1ing h* r - on the cheek, *\vhat Lhave done is all in the way of hu-im -s, and if you do not like to unit for three pub lications, 1 would advise you. >ir. (lim ing to the gentleman) to j m ure tle : license, the ring, ami (lie lee, and ihri#® the whole may be settled aa Soon as to morrow/ ‘Well/ replied the gentleman, addres sing the lady, ‘with your permission l wilt get them, and we may be married in a day or two.* Oh, you may both do as yon please,’ IMSttiriily, yet nothing HK Replied ihc It was a day or two nfier that the ii- conse Was procured. The parson re ceived hi* fee, the bridegroom Ins bride, and the widow for the jfc*L time threw Iter gloves over the pew, and it was afterwards said the parties were satisfi- ■«- | It appears that the British expendi ture for the year, which ended on the 1 Oth October, was upward* of seven millions sterling on account of the Army, and upwards of t^n millions on ^account of the Navy. r > - V