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About The Butler herald. (Butler, Ga.) 1875-1962 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 7, 1885)
:si). I v ) t Toil’s unnumbered cl ithe&isp of aledp, the cares of day Flap their dfonff wings and swiftly fly away. But there an! eyes which through the hours of night 1 Peer at their \*>i;k in flickering candlelight; AnJ there are‘fegot* which find little rest Till clasped fb«ver on the silent breast; F $ 6pok 'Jl Till from Jts cage the tired soul hath broken, Till *nen.h the sod, in Death’s all-watchful Night, Their oily rest is found in endless Night. —Richard R. Bean in the Current. / - . = -■=' = THE BUG MAN. , ■BY FLOKA L. W. STANFIELD. The proverbial straw had broken the metaphorical camel’s back. The pati ence of Charlotte Brantome, usually equal to the exigencies of the occasion, was exhausted. The twins, as a mat ter of course, were the culprits. They, however, with the complacency natur al to boys of six or thereabouts, were indifferent to the tempest off despair which raged within their sister’s breast. They had considerately re frained from adding deceit to their guilt, but had confessed, fully and un reservedly, to rilling the canary’s nest, to tearing a jacket, and losing a hat down the well, to eating the strawber ries that were saved for supper, and to catching their most faithful hen with a iish-hook. The fish-hook rep resented the straw; Charlotte the cam el. She could have borne anything better than downright cruelty develop ed so early in one of her own blood. She never was a boy. •‘And a man was here,” said Popsey. “A big man,” volunteered Wopsey, the other twin. “And he asked us about everything, and we said our mother wasn’t very well and our sister was an old maid school ma'am.” Charlotte winced. Where had he picked up that expression? And had it come to that? “You must not talk to strange men about mother or me. What did be want?” “He wanted to see you.” “Me?” Visions of tejmps, of spy ing burglaisgmly tWTj^d nothing to “burgle,’' as PopseifhadsauTome day, came into her m»£d. “How ^dtdfche look?” ~ f "He was beautiful.” “He was dread : fill,” said the I Vi ns in duet. f urther questioning elicted these facts: He was young; he was old; he was short; lie was tall; he wore spect acles; lie wore a mustache, and was a bug-man In the last and crowning fact the boys agreed. Practice had made Miss Bn^itome a tolerable clairvoyant, so far asBeading those two small minds, was She jumped at the con" some wandering^iat’ elusive bug^feail cb! gave the She 1 “bug hook. Blit What ig about? iug-man!” they ig toward her on their sandy certainly strange, "stranger call twice? mid come once was not sur* ■but twice? i e showed him your photograph,” said Popsey, “and he said you didn’t look like an old maid a bit:” “And he said,” went on the other terrible inf ant without a pause, “wasn’t Aud thcru aiv hearts which bent with pain ua-: we proud to have such a sister, he wished he had, and then he had such a lot of bugs he puts them to sleep with medicine and sticks pins through ’em, and he has a gold watch and he let us wind it up, and we told him to come again some more and here he is?” Charlotte was speechless, but in some way she found herself rising to her feet to greet a gentleman who was tfking off his hat to her and bowing with a grace which even Grandfather Brantome would have approved. “Miss Brantome, I believe.” She acquiesced in silence. “I am gathering materials for an historical work, and was directed to you for information concerning the antiquities of this region. And I might as well say now that I have ref erences and all that sort of thing.” “Then you are not—” She stopped; he smiled. “No, I am not exactly a bug man, as these little fellows have called me, although I must plead guilty to a slight leaning in that direction. Yet just now 1 would joyfully part with the biggest bugs of my collection if in exchange I might examine your grand father’s papers.” lie was so gracefully genial that one could no more be absurdly dignified with him than with the golden robin singing on the Indian cross. “Will you walk in ?” “I will sit out here instead if you will permit me to do so.” So Popsey and Wopsey dragged a chair and then stood motionless and wonder-eyed listening to the talk of discovery and adventure. They did not understand it very well until the conversation turned to Indian lore. Indians and bears they could compre hend. Then the mother, attracted by a strange voice, drew near the door in her melancholy, wavering way. “The postmaster's wife thought that La Salle was an Indian chief,” Char lotte was saying, “and she had heard of Father Marquette, but supposed him the priest down at La Paz.” “I met a woman the other day who thought a herbarium was a bug," re marked Mr. Duncan. Then they laugh ed. But everything comes to an end. The boys hoggin a dumb show behind the strainer’s, back to indicate to their stster thf Hmey were perishing of hun ger; so shelet tlie conversation lag in order to end the call. “Come to-morrow and see the papers if you like,'’ she said. “It will be Sat urday, and I shall be at home to answer questions.” He thanked her and withdrew, pimping over the rail fence which blurted the field of rye, in order to get a nearer view of the cross, on which not one, but a dozen, golden robins were holding a vespe- conclave. And the tea-kettle was socn singing in the Brantome kitchen a song as gay as that of the robins, and Charlotte was not her careful self as she picked the strawberries for tea “Half of ’em green,” said the dis gusted Wopsey. “’Spect she's think ing of the bug-man.” “She r tinned ii No mor^ words of the garden was from La Paz. The eTei nearly due. Leaving the twins to tod dle after as well as they could in their exhausted state, she ran. Ran ? She flew. The bright invalid shawl was a beacon. Mrs. Brantome sat upon the track, idly playing with some yellow flowers. Charlotte-knew her patient well “Mother,” she said, “it is late and the boys are calling, and you must feed the chickens.” The mother shook her head. Per suasion was no persuader. Then Char lotte scolded. Alike useless. Then, as a last resort, she used a gentle force. A failure Sit there and pull those yellow flowers to pieces—that the poor unbalanced one would do—nothing else. In Heaven’s name what was to be done ? Those who have had experi ence know the strength of the insane. The train whistled for the crossing a mile away, and just then (some guard ian angel guided him) James Duncan jumped the fence, a wet handkerchief in his hand. Blessings upon the medicine which subdued the bugs! It subdued this poor woman in a moment, and he had lifted her out of danger before the train rushed past. Then he explained. He had been copying the inscription on the Indian's tombstone as the boys went screaming by. lie gathered from their incoherent words what the matter was. The chloroform idea was simply an inspiration. “How can I repay you?” asked wet;, eyed Charlotte, as the party, boys, mother and all, were walking back. "By making over to me Pierre Bran- tome’s manuscripts--and his grand daughter. I can never write the his tory without her.” “Well,” softly, “in the cause of sci ence—perhaps.” And this is how it came to pass that the boys marched up the church aisle before the robins came again, with Charlotte and the bug-man. oney Mad<s_ a Great Rakirig Ovpr Refuse. '1 reason the day her do ot her % green, step of lie to her tried to as yet high, longest. Behind river; in front 'airie, the hills were of rye over the way gleamed a white wooden cross. Her grandfather, in whose veins flowed some of the blue blood of France, had bought a home in this western coun try when the remnant of an Indian tribe had still property to sell. The deed of sale provided for the preserva tion of their little burying-ground. The grain grew thick around, but the tiny village of the dead was never dis turbed by spade; or plough. Oid Pierre, however, had never pros pered. Neither did Pierre the young er; and one night, when riding home, his horse shied in the moonlight and threw him with his head against a stone; he left no legacy but the home stead and a debt to his wife and chil dren. There was a gap of twenty years between Charlotte and the twin babies, and she really had a third in fant on her hands, for her mother was nothing more useful than that after her husband’s death. She was not feeble-minded exactly, but painfully gentle—strange and unaccountable. Charlotte shouldered her burdens with a brave heart. Her French ac cent for Grandfather Brantome’s blood had never filtered through Cana da—brought her employment in a school town near by. The long walks back and forth kept the roses blooming in her cheeks, the boys were good— sometimes—and she, being busy, was happy. It requires leisure to be suc cessfully miserable. The burying-ground typified to her the “daily martyrdom of private life.” An I now, looking at it, her heart grew liiflit. The new hat would cost but a tnfle. Surely there were more straw berries ripe in the garden, the canary would lay more eggs, the jacket could be mended, and old Speckle had prov- It certainly was astonishing how much consultation the Brantome man uscripts needed. And, too, Mr. Dun can required so much assistance. It w;is “Miss Brantome, will you kindly I read this list while I copy it?’’ or, “Miss Charlotte, really I can’t make ; out whether this is an e or an i,” all the while. Grandfather Brantbuie 1 would have begun to inquire as to marriage settlements and Scotch pedi grees had he been alive to see those chestnut locks, innocent of bangs, and that dark mustache in such dangerous proximity. It was the old story—fwo young heads bending over the same page. No word of love had passed. All was on a strictly business basis— the history of the missions of the Northwest the objective aim. But at last there was no excuse for lingering any louger. The hills across the prairie were red and gold, the rob ins had fled, and the grain around the little burying-ground had been cut and j stowed away. Charlotte was walking home as usu al. Far away in the road two moving dots appeared, which developed into the twins as they came nearer. Tears were cutting briny furrows down their not very clean cheeks. Hysterical sobs alone came from their mouths as they tried to speak, but finally the sisterly intuition eliminated these words from the chaos: “Mother has runned away! She said sne would if we didn’t stop pounding, and we didn’t, and she has runned!” That poor mother! She had made the same threat a hundred times be fore, but had been pacified. “Which way? Tell me quickly,” thinking of the river, so tireless and so crueL “Reading Everything, has read everything,” is a re mark frequently made when a scholar ly man is under discussion. How absurd such a statement is will appear when the fact is mentioned that in the Congressional library at Washing ton there are over 600,000 volumes. If they were placed side by sido they would fill a shelf fifty miles long. If a man started to read this collection at the rate of one volume a day, it would take him 1,650 years to get through. And while the man would be at work on this vast library the printers would be turning out more than 15,000 new books a year. From these figures it will be seen that it is idle to think of reading everything, or even to read all the best books. The greatest read ers among our distinguished men have, had their favorite books, which they read and reread. Certain books in our language are called classics. They are models of style and full of ideas and illustrations. Modern writers go to these old authors and get*lumps of solid gold which they proceed to beat out very thin. Why should we take the gold leaf article when we can go to the original mines and get solid nuggets ? The old novels are the best. The old poets have not been equalled. Too many of our new books are writ ten hastily to sell. They are of an in ferior quality and cannot profit U3 in any way. A man, therefore, need not be ashamed to say that he has not read the last new book. When forty new books appear every day it is impossible to read them alL—Atlanta Constitu tion. A Great Organ. The organ made by the Roosevelts for the cathedral built by the widow of A. T. Stewart at Garden City, L. L, is the most extensive instrument of the kind in the world. It has 115 stops and 7,252 pipes, and cost $100,000. Meet of It is set in an octagonal cham ber made by the angle where fhe tran sept and chancel walls join, fifteen feet in diameter, and extending from the basement floor upward to a dis tance of forty feet. A remarkable feature is its construction so as to dis tribute the sounds in four different parts of the cathedral at once, all re maining under control of the player at the main organ. The four divisions are classified as follows: Chancel, fifty-four stops ; tower, thirty-eight stops ; chapel, fifteen stops ; echo, eight stops. Steam power is employed in inflat ing the bellows. There are double en gines of ten horse power beneath the chancel division to supply it with com pressed air, and the speed is governed as far as possible, by the rise and tall of the bellows. In the room beneath the vestibule, directly under the tower division, Is a single engine of ten horse power. The greatest novelty is the electric chime action, by which thir teen bells in the organ tower are played from the solo manual. The bells are rung with the same force and precision as though struck in usual manner, and may be rung in connec tion with the music that is played on the organ. The organ cases, made in Philadelphia, are magnificent speci mens of carving in decorated English Gothic, profusely enriched. — Bouton Transcript. \ York’s Dumping Grounds } vauge wire bask^ia with iioisting gear of iron chains have been rigged at all of the fourteen damps on the North and East Rivers, tthd Italians may be seen every day soaking rags in the baskets. The idea of the unique machine was borrowed from the dog pound. The rig is fixed upon the end of the pier. When the basket is full it is let down into the water, and the tide is left to do the washing. Every pound of dirt washed out of the rags represents a loss of a cent and a quar ter, the average price of rags at whole sale, and many a dollar is hopelessly sunk in the river in that way. The Board of Health and Major Bullard, chief of the sanitary police, who got up the washing business, are held re sponsible for this outrage. The ash barrels of the city, before their contents are finally dumped into the sea, are made to yield quite $5000 a year to nearly 100 Italians who han dle the refuse at the dumps. This is exclusive of the rag-picking in the streets which still goes on in spite of police prohibition. The city gets its share of the profit. The work of trim ming the scows, or, in other words, of packing the dirt evenly before they are sent out to sea, i^ sold by the city to one Tom Roach for $120 a week. Roach hires the privilege of sorting over the refuse hs the carts dump their loads, and of-picking out what is worth having. He is, however, merely the middleman, and Jose Cicarilla, an Italian, is the real contractor. He pays to Roach, or his equivalent, a bo nus of $20 a week for his contract, and hires a sufficient number of his coun trymen at from $5 to $7 a week to do the work. At present his s'aff em braces 94 men, whose duty it is to sort over and trim daily a scow load of refuse at each clump, exclusive of the waste paper gatherers, who form a sort of skirmishing line at the dumps, help ing a little, and receiving a pittance of $1 or $1.50 a week from the sub-con tractor, and all the waste paper they can find. The aggregate amount of money paid to this army of scavengers in the course of the year by their boss is between $50,000 and $40,000. Some of them live under the dumps, others in cheap tenements, all in squalor and misery. Rags and bones are the principal sources of revenue of the ash heaps. Some rags are much more valuable than others, but, taken as a whole, they bring a cent and a quarter a pound. Bones, that stand next upon the list and are scrupulously saved by the delvers, bring 60 cents a barrel as ma terial for bone black, knife handles and buttons. They are exported in close wagons, principally to Crow Hill, across the river, where the charcoal factories are. Whole bottles are quoted at 75 cents and broken clear glass at a quarter a barrel. Until re cently tin cans were an important source of revenue, at the rate of six or seven dollars a big load, the supply be ing unlimited. But now they are a drug in the market, and are left to the stale beer workers. They have had their day. The east sider, a present resident of First avenue, who first saw visions of wealth in the tin and solder of empty preserve cans realized his dream. He has retired with a snug fortune. The waste paper, toe, is despised by the trimmers, and is left to the skirmish ers, who sell it for what they can get. At moving time and when people prepare to go to the country or are coming back, lots of things go into the ash barrel that have no value to the owner, but help to make trade brisk for the boss trimmer. Old boots, pass able hoop skirts, and a thousand odds and ends, all of use, turn up at the dumps then with heaps of rags. Some times lost valuables turn up, or silver spoons thrown into the ash barrel with the kitchen refuse by careless servants. Once a live baby was clumped on a cart, the heartless mother haviDg thrown it in a barrel and covered it with refuse; but it found its breath before the dump was reached and frightened the driver with its unex pected howls. How much Cicarilla bargain be does not i question is put hesbrugi and complains of hard tin? in much better style than 6 his countrymen on the secoi a good class Bayard street When his scows are trim gangs of Italians, whom he the city; go out to sea in tl dump their contents. Capital! made propositions now and lliei the city’s street cleaning, take" refuse out in the bay, build an is' of it, and store and utilize it all the! but only on condition that the cit; shall give them a long contract and 1 pay handsomely for having the job j taken off its hands, as it does in the j matter of removing offal and dead an imals from the street. The proposi- | tions have never been made in practi- j cal form.—New York Bun. The Efiflccss The stofy ttf .the life' CiHJEva Bryant Mackay, who Fecentl^beCaine, by Car riage with a titled Italian; tie Prin cess of Colonna, brings to ligtit some! strange things, says a Portland (Ore gon) letter to the New York Sun. I hate found one of those characteristic ’49ers who; iil tiie days Of Miss Mac kav’s poverty, mined in Sitirrfi bounty,- California. He is Tom Jordan, one of the gold-pocket hunters whom Mark Twain so graphically describes. Said he in a recent interview: “Miss Hungerford, MisS JTackay’s mother, when I first knew her in 1855, was a very pretty little girl of only 12 years, who lived at Goodyear's Bar with her widowed father, Major Hun gerford. He was a Louisiana creole, and spoke French and Spanish fluent ly, as did also the child. Miss Hun gerford grew prettier as she became older, and at length became the ac knowledged belle of the mining town. Offers of marriage from wealthy min ers, storekeepers, lawyers and men of other callings were refused, until one day the girl met Dr. Bryant, a dashing young man of 26, from the neighbor ing camp of Downiesville. It was a case of mutual love at first sight. In less than a year they were married. A year later the Doctor died from blood poisoning,contracted while mak ing an autopsy in the case of a young woman said to have been poisoned. “Meantime Eva Bryant was born Dr. Bryant, who had followed the Western way of living, left his young wife and child in very stringent cir cumstances, and a purse of $700 was subscribed for them, and Mrs. Bryant took up her residence in Virginia City, then in the heyday of its prosperity. There she met John W. Mackay, who became the wealthiest of all the bo nanza kings. “It’s strange, isn’t it, that little Miss Hungerford, who used to trot about barefooted among the rough miners of Goodyear’s Bar, is now the leading and wealthiest American lady in Paris,and the fatherless and destitute baby, Eva, is the Princess of Colonna? And I, a contemporary, who saw it all, and be held a thousand others go up on the wings of wealth, am a ousted miner, eking out my livelihood in the sage brush deserts of Umatilla county." Kansas Sheep. Sheep they were, indeed; thousands of them, objects of unfailing concerns to the gentlemen and delight to the ladies. “What is that stone wall?" asked, one afternoon, a lady sitting on the piazza with her opera-glass. “That stone wall, madam, answered a Harvard graduate, politely, “is the sheep coming in to the corral.” To see the sheep go in and out, night and morning, was a never-failing amusement. Sometimes the ladies wandered down to the corrals at sun set to see the herds come in, and you would have supposed them to be waiting for a Fourth-of-.Tuly proces sion with banners, from the eagerness with which they exclaimed, “Oh, here they come! there they are!” as the first faint tinkling of the bells was heard in the distance. If two herds appeared at once from opposite direc tions. the one with lambs had the “right of way,” and Sly, the sheep-dog —not the only commander who has controlled troops by sitting down in front of them—would hold the other herd in check till the iambs were safe ly housed. The lambs born on the prairie during the day frisked back at night to the corral beside their mothers a lamb four hours old being able to walk a mile. When shearing-time came, they went into tne sheds expecting to see the thick wool fall in locks beneath the shears, like the golden curls oi their own darlings; great was the amazement to see the whole wooly fleece taken off much as if it had been an overcoat, looking still, if it were rolled up in a ball, like a veritable sheep, and often quite as large as the shorn and diminished creature thai had once been part of it. One ven hot day they braved the heat them selves for the sake of going out on the prairie to see how sheep kei instead of scatterin. seeking singly the or the tall tree the receivin eggs, and shipped successfully berry trees and 8 f are essential, the South ] field of labor. A nugget of gold weighing 21 pounds (abtfUt $5,009) has been found at the Berlin diggings, Vietoria, and brought into Dunolly by two miners. The gold field was celebrated for nuggets some years since, and the present find will no doubt lead to the discovery of others. The Chicago Tribune remarks that “the Japanese gdfefnment is wrest ling with the question of text-books in the schools. Think of it! A nation only lately barbarous already attain ing to that highest index of civiliza tion, a wrangle over the claims of rival publishing houses ! The evolu tion of Japan is the real marvel of the ninteenth century.” •*a**— The population of the State of Nevada has dwindled down to i2,0Q0 in consequence of the collapse of the mining interests, and there are scarce ly enough inhabitants left to maintain a State government. The saltpetre beds, however, may induce a fresh immigration, and add to the popula tion. The deposits are very favorably situated for working, being in the vicinity of a rich farming Country, with an abundant supply of wood and water close at hand. In the New Orleans markets every thing is sold by the eye. There is no standard of measurement. Nine- tenths of the hundreds who sell in the noted French markets of the city do not know what a bushel or a peck is. They buy their vegetable by the lot, and place them in little piles on tables. These piles are of different sizes and prices. The buyer looks at the piles and buys that which he thinks is big gest and best. Sometimes buckets and boxys are used to measure, but they are of all kinds and shapes. There was no city in Europe with 1,000,000 inhabitants at the beginning of the present ceDtury, the most popu lous being London, with 865,000 per sons. There are now five European cities with upward of 1,000,000 in habitants, and the first two of which contain in the aggregate 7,000,000 persons. In America, at the begin ning of the century, there were no cities that would now be regarded as more than fourth-class towns; the population of New York was about 60,000. At the last census there were twenty-six in the United States which exceeded that figure. . The Yuma Indians of Arizona, who at the American occupation of Cali fornia were to be found scattered over all the desert bottoms of the Colorado River and its tributaries, and who were then supposed to number six thousand souls, now number only about fifteen hundred. The men are above the average ot any white race in stature; in fact, a short man is not to be found. Broad chested and strong limbed, with a springy gait and a swinging stride. Yuma is no ordinary man and capable of wonderful endur ance. Contact with civilization has been the bane of the tribe. One of the greatest attractions of the London season has been the series of concerts given by Senor Sorasata, the Spanish violinist, who holds to-day a position at the head of his profession in Europe. Although Sorasata ap peared in this country years ago, he was then comparatively little known outside of his own country, and American audiences evidently failed to recognize the superiority of his genius. This year he was heard In England for the first time, and his performances have been described as a series of artistic triumphs. He is not only an interpreter of the classic works, lint is a comc^ himself, and bisow: of Customs," Jn last annual repo) tation of green fruit, afef more oranges im United SfsrteB than are grown in both Florida and California, and there are four times as many grown in Florida as in California. The importation ot lemons to even greater than the im portation of oranges. The seport makes it appear that the number ot boxes of lemons grown in tbe United does not exceed 50.000. In concluding this report, the opinion is expressed that the lemon market has not yet been tonched by home growers, while the orange trade from foreign ports has been sharply attacked. California and Florida in two years more will prac tically drive foreign oranges out of the market, as the United States produces a better orange than can be N itAorted, and it is only a matter of timeqvben there will be enough lemons grownxto supply the home demand at remuner ative figures. The number of titledfamilies in Russia is by no means large". But as every member of the family bears"tiie title, the number of titled personages is immense. A title In Russia posses ses no political value Oi significance. But that it counts for something, espe cially when it is associated with large possessions, is shown by the recurrence of many of the same names for centu ries past in Russian history, In Rus sia, as everywhere elBe, a man cannot become a member of a great family except by creating one for himself. But any one who attains a certain rank in the army or civil service can become a nobleman with such slender advantages as nobiliary privileges con fer. In the days of serfdom the noble, though bound to serve the state in some capacity, was free from taxes and from the conscription; and he pos sessed the exclusive right of holding land with serfs attached to it. All this is now changed; but the Russian no bles still possess the right of meeting in assembly for the election of local officials, and for making known their wishes and wants in a direct manner to the sovereign. This last right they have used sparingly indeed; and when in 1862, immediately after the emanci pation of the serfs, they demanded, in a great number of provinces, the im mediate promulgation of a constitu tion, their address was not received; while in some cases those who were daring enough to press in person for its reception were punished by impris onment. Fuller accounts of England’s. pres ents to the Ameer of Afghanistan are now given. The London Pall Mall Gazette says: “The ground was soon covered with trays heaped with costly gifts for the Ameer personally. There were among them a diamond chronom eter with a guard and Albert chain; sets of cups, tankards, pitchers, and tea equipages in silver; timekeepers of every kind, from carriage clocks to a musical watch and perpetual calendar; a magnificent landscape agate salver, exquisitely hand-painted; a jewel cab inet, and a number of silver-mounted rifles, guns and revolvers. Gold and jeweled lockets and necklets were pro vided for the ladies of his household, with quantities of beautiful fabrics. Among the Jarge presents were a state chair and a table of pure crystal, the former with cushions of crimson vel vet; an international music-box, and a splendid orchestrion, which plays alter nately English and Indian airs. Out side in the Viceroy’s ground a dozen elephants for the Ameer were swing ing their handsome howdahs; half a dozen splendid gift-horses stood near, and his siege trains and battery of mountain guns had just been paraded past,” Andrew Jackson’s Tenderness. “People have little idea of the ten derness of President Jackson’s heart,” ed with the pains of fa-st-approaclnj The heart by daily The wearied spirit fimdfh rest, As, pillowed on the sod, With nought above bnt leaf and sky. And loving look of Heavenly Eye, Perehanee with angels hovering Ogh, I dream of Nature’s God. —Edwarh JV. Jtichards in the Current. HUMOROUS. Night keys—Key notes of a cat con cert. “We meet to part no more,” said the bald-headed man to ids hair brush. The mule may not be as intelligent. a3 the horse, but he has more brayin’. Every man has a skeleton in his closet; a borrowed umbrella for in stance. A maid is a young lady who Is- single and who will be won if she marries. There is many 3 dynamiter who is afraid to give his mother-in-law a blowing up. “How sleep the brave?” asks a poet. This depends largely upon the number of cats in the neighborhood. Some one has been lecturing on “The Danger of Eating Candy.” Cut this out and show it to your sweetheart The giraffe has never been; known to utter a sound. This is what makes the giraffe so valuable. They come high, but we must have them. A tear of charity dimmed her eye, When she saw how the room was kept. She put out her hand with a sad, sad sigh Then fell on the broom and swept* “The most unkindest cut of all” is frequently furnished you by your butcher with the assurance that it is sirlion. “He that loves noise must buy a pig,” says a Spanish proverb. In most cases, however baby will answer just as well. A trifling loss : “Yes,” he observed, “I was more than surprised. I lost my head.” “Ah,” she returned, with an aggravating look, “who told you?” There is no voice which appeals to the heart of a father so much as that of his baby boy, but that of a healthy cat on the back-yard fence will move him quicker. Paper plates are coming into fashion in the East. The only way the hired girl can get even is to bounce the tin ware around and break stove covers. In roller skating flirtation parlance, when a skater sits down very sudden ly and very hard in front of his lady love it is a sign that this is his first season on roller skates. “Do you love me as weliMjym.did?” softly asked th9 bride of aW^. °f ^ er husband. “Quite, my darlii* ioetor’s bills are so high that I low' you as well as it is possible for you to bo,” be replied. In some parts of Europe men drink cologne instead of liquor. When a man comes home very late, in those countries, his wife is puzzled to decide whether he has been in a saloon or a barber shop. An exchange says that a pinch of salt put in a cat’s saucer of milk, and in its meat two or three times a week, will prevent it from having fits. P* will a load of BB shot, but you must put them all in the cat. “Cooking Clubs for Men” is the title of an article in an exchange. Why they cooking such things for men is a mystery. We should think a cooked club wouldn’t be any more digestible than a ronsted clam. “What brought you to prison, colored friend?” said a philajj visitor to a New York prjj constables, sah.” “Yea had intemperance j Lanla,