Newspaper Page Text
VOL. G.
TIIE WEEKLY
Cartemrille Exprew
T* published every FK/ED-A-TT
tDorniug. in Cartersville, Barlow County, Ga.,
I >y >
Smith & Miuif, *
I’roprictors, at Thuik Dollar's. per an
num,Klriclh/ in advance ;■ Two Dollars for
t>ix Month* ; One Dollar for Three Month*.
Advertisement* for one month, or less time
One Dollar per square, (often lines or less,)
for each insertion; all other advertisements
will be charged Fifty per cent on old price*.
PROFESSIONAL CAROS.
JERE A. HOWARD,
ATTORNEY AND COUNSELLOR AT LAW.
oa.
W H PRITCHETT,
Attorney at Law.
CARTERSVILLE. GEORGIA.
I -aft \(j ri(;JB8 Law in all the courts of .the
(Jlierokee circuit and countiea adjoining
JJ.irtow. * Jarred.
THOMAS W. MILNER,
Attorney at Law,
CARTERSVILLE. GEORGIA,
Will at'end promptly to business entrusted
In hi* care. Oct. ft wly
TIIOS. W. DODO,
Attorney at La w
AND COUNT/ COURT SOLICITOR.
lilns*lon. Oa.
Will give particular attention to the
collection offlaims. Oct 26.
John C. Brannon,
ATTORNEY & COUNSELLOR AT LAW,
KINGSTON, GA.
1\!{ \CTICF.N L\\V in the several coun
ties nf the Cherokee Circuit, also, Polk,
}1 irr iUnit and Floyd counties, Prompt at
tention given to business, Nov. 23. ly
(Professional cards 10 cash pcrannum.J
JOHN W. WOFFORD,
Attorney at Law,
CARTERSVILLE, GA.
Also. FIRE INSURANCE AGENT.
Represents the best Northern ami
.Southern Companies.
JOHN ). JONES
attorney at law.
CurtßrtvMf., Ga.
\T T 11,1, attend promptly toali busi less en
\V trusted to his cure. Will practice in
t l ,. Cunts of law, and equity in the Cherokee
C rcuit. Special attention given to the codec
ot claims. Ja.Kl.lßf.fi. ly
Join* J- Jones.
John j.jonTs
in: 4J« IIST iTfi AttfiA’T,
CARTERSVILLE GA
I xn\ ini’horlzY.l to He'll, an,l l>»vc on Ban,! several
li ,ii eci <» *t ttnl .ilH'iuumvruin building lol.itn the
i ' vmol Oh iei-Ht If. AU<> vurl
*' * \ { , inri.t»vv con tv. turtles dcMtriny; to buv or
* I vi.l tl» acli 1 1 irivc mo a chW. £ l \ oodimaniciiwoaa
|,r»m|„ly attWerd. ,Tulj 17. 1566.
,S u v g e o n a ii and
Mcclianical Dentist.
uudiirsigncd respectfully offer his pro-
I fessional services to the c'tuervs ot <ar
*, *.vide and vicinity. Ho i» prepared
t „ do all kinds of Tlffryvi work belonging
To liis profession. Fall setts of
iu .«
„v.i k ,r,i, m. e»"_
lilt. T. F. JONES,
y pi; N 1)K RS his professional services to the
I citizens of KINGSTON ami vicinity, and
re sportfully solicits a portion ol their pationagt .
June .2-
DR. HUGH A. BLAIR,
l’liynU-inu and surgeon,
Gtrrlerscilk, Georgia.
TjrST’F.CTVrt.I.Y tender* hi* professional services to
\4rom b vM hi. residence, on Main St., M* resi-
AeiZ o. Air I’. Marsh. Jun « aL
DU. 0. HXREUTOX
Car tern vi He. Georgia.
Tenders hl> professions! 8t vices to the °.i
artrrsvtlle and surrounding country, and d
O U\S at all hours. Office up-stalr. In Ur. 8»muell tl.y
t a’* New Brick Building. May 10. lsti.,wly
Lanier 11 o u s e,
MARIETTA, GA.,
BY ELLISON A. DOBBS, Proprietors
T lIHIS House is located iu a few steps of the
I Railroad, where the cars stop. Passengers
tike three meals a day here. Meals piepared
a all hours. juty ~4.
sTH. Pattillo,
FASHIONABLE TAILOR,
Wilt attend promptly to the Cutting, Repair
ing and Making Boy's and Meu’s Clo htng. TPI
Ofiice In back room of Blair A, Bradshaw s store.
Oartertvilie, Ga.
i,©’®sssiß@»
Dress Tailor.
.»« ]8 prepared to execute all kinds
of work in the Fashionable Tail
.lf I. ing line, with neatness and in du- )I.L,
ra hte stylo, Over J. Lisas Jc Cj s store,
Carter*'.•(lie. jail 2ft,
J. W- MAXWELL.
BRICK MASON,
I* prepared to do all kinds of work in Brick and
r looe at short notice. Has on hand a ftn# lot of newly
burned b.tck and Is prepared to do work upon th*
moat reasonable term*.
CartersvU'* Gj«., May Srd, IS6T.
The Cartersvlllc Hotel.
DR. THOMAS MILAM having
charge of this House, would be ■’ITT
pleased to accommodate a few Board- Sf 1!
4<rs with BOARD, with oj without
Lodging. Call and see him at ones for terms
CarttrsviUe, Jau 17.
THE CARTERSVILLE EXPRESS.
CARTERSVILLE ADVERTISEMENTS,
rpT TPCT7 I livery
LV;LI T ijlj i. and Sate
Stable,
H^g|
J. G. Stocks,
Respectfully notify the Puwtc generally that
he ha* just openned hi* New and Commodi
ous LIVBBY AND SALE STABLE, snd ha* tt stock
ed with good horses, buggies, Ac., *od Is prepared to
furnish those traveling into and across the country
with any kind of private conveyance. He Is also
prepared to Board Stock in any quantity with comfort
able quarters and bountiful feed at reasonable rate*.
Stock bought and sold at his stables. His stock all
being fresh and equipage new he flatter himself with
the belief that he can furnish his customers with as
neat and complete an out-fit as any like establishment
In Ifyper Georgia. All he asks to establish this fact is
a trial. CARTKKSVILLE, GA. .March 22, 186 T.
We are requested by C°b J- G. Stocks to an
nounce to the public, that he has bought out
the Livery Stock of J. J. Jones Jr, and that the
two Stables will be consolidated, and that the
following list of prices will be strictly adhered
to.
Hack horses,sad driver per day #7,00
Hi rse, Buggy and Driver “ “ WO
Horse A Buggy “ “ •*,OO
“ - X day t*.so
Sadd-e horse per ** ,stso
« w ">fday 11,AO
TV. L. Kirkpatrick & Cos., Druggists,
CARTERSVILLE, GA.
WILT. Wp constant on hand a well
seeded stock of pure
DRUGS m MEDICINES,
tiuif»,@sxs t
sc®
Patent Medicines* Bc c.
Jones’ Carriage Repository,
Jan 17.
OASi ! S -A-HST-O
CASKETS.
By Erwin & Jones.
ASSORTED sizes kept on hand. Also
WOOD COFFINS made to order. A
good HEAIISE ready at all hours.
CARTERSVJLLc. Feb 1, 1807. wly
Jr»kW . n. MOtXTCASTLE,
Jeweller and Watch and
'SiF Clock Repairer,
‘ln the Front of A. A. Skinner & Co's] store -
Cartersville jan 2A
James W. Strange,
Dealer in
STOVES.
GRATES,
IRON,
HARDWARE,
PLAIN AND JAPANNED TIN WARE, &C.
Clean Linen and Cotton Rags taken in ex
change for Goods. Repairing, Roofing and
Guttering done with neatness and dispatch.
Cartersville, Nov. 1. wly
A A
SKINNER
CO.,
Dealers in
GROCERIES
AND
produce.
- CARTERSVILLE, GA.
Aug. 16. *
Samukl ClaA'on, 11. A. Claytox.
S CLAYTON & SON,
DEALERS IX
GENERAL MERCHANDISE.
AND COMMISSION MERCHANTS,
CARTERSVILLE, GA.
We keep a general stock and can fnrniih you with
anything you waut. Oume to see u* —we will sell ynu
goeds a at reasonable prices. Come and look at our
stock—No harm done If we cant trade.
If friends favor us with consignments or orders, we
will ute our every esie pioltciiveof their interests.
BUTTER, EGGS, DRIED BLACKBERIES
&c. taken at market rates for goods.
5000 LBS.
Clean Cotton and Linen
wanted. When ready sacked we will take them at 3
cents per lb. for goods. Bring tFwm in any quantity.
Uriah Stephens is with us —he InYltes all his
friends to call and see what he can do for them
Atlanta Quotations .. wed for Gold Dust snd old
B.i'ik Bills. je 28.
CARTERSVILLE GA, SEPTEMBER 20, 1807.
CARTERSVILLE ADVERTISEMENTS-
J. A. E“ WI " &C°
jit e receiving- their Stoch of
SPRING AND
,§htmmtr Coobs,
COMPRISING every variety adapted to th* want* of
th* country, which they are determined to *ell at
(he Loweit Prllces—
Cheaper
than the
Cheapest!
All ar* invH«d to
CALL, EXAMINE AND BUY
BARGAINS. ,
Terms: Cash!
and our motto is
Small Profits.
Cartersville, Ga., April Ift, ISG7.
NEW STORE! IVFW GOODS ! i
And New Arrangements.
The undersigned takes pleasure In announcing to the
citizens of Cartersville and surrounding country. Ihat
he has just opened out a most splended and FAtli*
ION ABLE Stock of
st&ism 4 ns
DRY GOODS?
adapted to the wants of the people, which he proposes
to sell at Pi ices to SUIT the TIMES.
Ladles will find almost Everything pertaining to their
WARDROBE.
GENTLEMEN will find Material and Furnishing
Goods for Clothing.
Families will find all kinds of goods common for do-
MESTIC: USE, also BOOTS, SHOES,
Hats, Bonnets, Hoop Skirts,
Umbrellas &c &c.
Also will keep em hand a large lot of
FACTORY -YYAJBLTsTS.
HE WOULD be happy to receive calls at any time
His doors are thrown wide open, and the Invitation
is to alt Come and examine his goods and prdoes.
Next, door to A. A. Skinner A Co_ and ju«t below Abe
Post Office U- FERGUSON,
Post Office, 9 T STOCKS with Fergusoc.
Cartersville, Ga n May lst,lSo7.
W. M. Shackleford,
Wholesale and Retail
GROCER
AND COMMISSION MERCHANT,
CARTERSVILLE, GA.
Agent for universal life in
surance COMPANY, of New York.
Office in new Store next .o Post Office.
Aug. 15. wtc
W.H. GILBERT,
CARTERSVILLE, GA.
Dealer exclusively ix
Stoves*
Hardware*
House Furnish
ing goods*
Iron and
Steel*
•Agricultural
Implements.
TERMS CASH.
Aug. 16, w6m,
NOTICE.
TO all whom it m*y concern, the untlersigh
ned hereby given notice that he has. tiled
hi s petition wilh theOrdinaryxifßartow Coun
ty to be discharged from his Executorship on
Bennett H. Conyers, last wiliand testament,
on account of busine-s arrangements, and ina
ability therefrom to attend said trust, that in
two months from thebeginnii g of the publica
tion of this notice he will apply for the sanction
of said petition, and to be discharged from said
executorship, je 3 —6 m. C. B CONYERS,
Ex. of B. tt. CONYERS dec.
Mortgage Sale.
1117" ILL be sold before the Courthouse door
\\ in Cartersville, on the Ist Tuesday in
October-.
Lots of land, Nos. 274—238—267 and 273
containing One Hundred and Sixty Acres each
making in all six hundred and forty acres, lying
in the sth dist. and 3d section of Bartow coun
ty Levied on as the property of Dempsey F.
Bishop to satisfy a mortgage fi fa, issued from
Bartow Superior court in favor of Howard,
Stokely & Cos., vs Derr psey F. Bishop ; prop
erty described in said fifa.
Aug, 8 ’67. W. L GOODWIN, Sh s ff,
pEORGIA, BARTOW COUNTY.—Robert C. Saxon
*1 one of the Administrators on the estate of Richard
H. Milner, deceased, having petitioned to be discharg
ed from said administration. All persons who are con
cerned are required within the time fixed by law, if any
they have, why the said Robert C. Saxon, should not be
discharged according to the prsyer of his petition.
Given under my band and official signature, th's the
3th June, IS6T. J. A. HOWARD. Ord.
Administrator’s Sale.
TT T ILL be sold before the Court House door in Car-
W tereville, within the legal hour* of sale, on the 4th
Tuesday la November next.
One half of Town L«t, in the town of Kingston, No.
27. measuring 50 by 182 feet. Sold a* the property.of
W. W. Tippins, deceased, for the benefit of the heirs
and creditors. Term*. CASH. J B. TIFFINS.
( September, 11th, 1867. Adm'r.
CARTERSVILLE ADVERTISEMENTS
ITiOliiiij
CARRIAGE REPOSITORY
AID
141® #
CARTERSVILLE, GA.
§RjjT*Special attention given to Repair
ing.
HAVING opened business at my old
stand, I am prepared to do anv and all
Kituls of work desired in the Carriage Line,
at low figures for cash. I shall keep oil hand
a fine assortment ot
Bug&ies 8c Carriages
and can, at short notice, furnish any kind oi
a VEHICLE desired. Having connected
myself with
Messrs. Wym£« & May,
Augusta) a*
a well known and reliable firm, I will sell
at Augusta freights added,
from the heel Factories at the North and
East. All of whsch will be warranted right,
Being well acquainted with the country and
(>eople, with long experience in the business,
I purpose to furnish the market with such
work as will give perfect satisfaction, I shall
be able to furnish the entire country, as mj
facilities are unlimited. Call and examine, it
shall cost you nothing. I feel assured that
the good people of this county will appreciate
the honest efforts of one of their old citizens,
broke down by the war, R. H, JONES,
January 17, 'Sfi? wly
OBD DEBTS!!
OLD DEBTS!!!
All persons indebted to the old Mercantile
firms of of HOWARD, STOKELY & ( 0..
and J, A. & S. ERWIN, are respectfully urg
ed to make liberal payments on these debts out
of the present wheat crop. All who refuse to
respond to this call for only part payment will
be sued, 'i hese debt* are from six to ten years
standing, and longer indulgence cannot be giv
en. Call at J. A. ERWIN & CO.’S store
where the claiuis are, and make liberal pay
ments and save suits.
Cartersville, Ga., Jpne 18, 1867.
Saving of Money!
Saving of Sugar!
Saving of Trouble!
13Y USING
Spear’s Pattent
FRUIT PRESERVING
SOLTTTIOK'
This Solution is a perfect Antiseptic—the
cheapest and best method in the world for
preserving aU kinds of Fruits, Tomatoes, Veg
etables, Jeliies, Cider, Wine, Milk, Syrups,
<&c.
It is warranted to contain nothing injurous
to health.
Fruits preserved by this Solution, areas good
as the best “canned” fruits, while the use of
the Solution avoids the trouble of sealing, cost
ly jars or cans, keeping from the air and light,
frequent examinations, and the many other
troubles and annoyances well known to every
housewife.
It admits of keeping the Fruit &e„ in ves
sels of any size, and of using them at long in
tervals, when the vessels are opened,
lit Saves Sugar
The Solution will preserve equally as well
without any sugar, (but does not coutain any
sweetening properties); therefore it is only
needful to add enough sugar to make the
fruit palatable.
It Will Preserve Milk Sweet
From 12 to 36 hours longer than it will natu
rally keep, with a result of furnishing more and
making more butter in warm weather.
THIS SOLUTION IS TIOT A NEW AND
UNCERTAIN EXPERIMENT,
but has been in practical use for the past eight
years—has been sold in the Philadelphia and
Baltimore markets for the past eight years.
ITS MERITS ARE POSITIVELY ESTAB
LISHED
By Scientific Analysis, and b\ practical dem
onstration in thousands of families,
FULL DIRECTIONS FOR USING AC
COMPANY EACH BOTTLE,
SOLD BY DRUGGISTS, GROCERS AND STORE
KEEPERS GENERALLY,
A. A. SKINNER & CO.,
SOLE AGENTS, CARTERSVILLE, GA.
aug. 23, 1867 wtf.
STAQEY JHIOTTSIET
GLAY ROBERTS, Proprietor,
Church Street,
NASHVILLE, TENNESSE E
July 19 1867
Notice.
TWO months site’’ <i»t« application will be made *o
the conrt of Ordin*' Jof Bsrtow conntv. for leave
to sell all the real estate belonging to W. P. B'afiley,
late of said chanty, deceased. K. C. BRADLEY
August. 12 1967 Adm’r.
UCOKGII BCI2XES.
Old Slanwix tells the following
Georgia story, ami vouches lor iis
truthfulness:
About thiity-llirce ami a ifnrd years
there dwell in one of the rural
districts of Georgia an old codger hv
the name of Buit Cult- Knyler, who
had lorinerly enjoyed llie honors and
emoluments pertaining *o the office of j
Justice ol the Peace, the duiu:.-, of
which office he discharged with ac
knowledged ability and dignity ; and
so tar as ills neighbors were capable of
judging, he appeared to be a very
honest man. He had, however. ac~
qu red the habit ol “trumping up” ac
counts against the estates of those of
his neigbors who were so unfortunate
as to “ shuffle off their mortal coils”
wil iin the bounds nt bisbatlwiek. He
had carried till* practice to such an ex
tent as to arouse a suspicion i:i the
minds ol some ol his meddlesome
neighbors that there might be -‘some
thing dead” somewhere in “the seat
ot his— iinattcial operations. Bob
Grogan, who lived in the neighbor
hood, and “run” the post-office at the
cross-roads, being something of a wag,
and having an idea that the ’Squire’s
honesty should be quoted below par,
concluded, with the connivance aud
assistance of a few eomrades, to “un
ear;h the sly old lox,” aud expose his
rascalities. Accordingly Bob pretend
ed to die, was regularly shrouded and
laid 4)ut oil the cooling board in the
most approved fashion, and sorrowing
friends proceeded to spread the news
of his demise, which soon reached the
ears of old Butt-Gutt. He lost no time
iu repairing to the house of mourning,
carrying wilh him a“ full and complete
assortment” ol first class‘condolence
and sympathy for gratuitous distribu
tion, among the members of the be
reaved family, and the manv sorrowing
friends of the supposed deceased, who
were present when he arrived. Alter
he had relieved 1 1 is heart of its burden
ol healing words, and had succeeded
iu a tolerable effort at crying, and was
about to leave the scene, he tenderly
spoke as follows :
‘*Ah, poor 800 ; I’m sorry he died,
he was a good teller, and I alius liked
him. When me and him went to the
races at Augusta—now nigh unto two
years ago—l loaned him a hundred
dollars to bet unto a bay mare, and he
lost and has never paid me a cent of
that money Irotn that dny to this.—
Poor feller, he forgot it I reckon, hut
its a honest debt; ol course I can git
it out of his estate, and ”
Butt Cult didn’t finish die sentence,
for just at this point Bob, the corpse,
slowly raised up in his shroud, aud
stretching out his arms toward the
rogue, as if to clutch him, yelled :
“You are an infernal old liar, and
'l'lie din and roar drowned the rest,
and old B itt Cult didn’t wait to see or
hear anything more, but with the hur
ried exclamation, “goddlemity,” he
shot through the door, hurried to his
home, “packed his traps,” and not on
ly left the neighborhood, but the State
ol Georgia, forever.
Sleeping Equality.
A ft lend has just stepped in, who
gives us tire following : Asa practical
test of the sincerity of newly converted
radicals, who commend its general a
dopdon by those of our colored people;
whose votes and influence the Radicals
are endeavoring to obtain by a regular
system of equality hoodwinking:
Rev. Mr. Talley-of the Montgomery
Conference of the Methodist Episcopal
Church South, who is “weak vessel,”
has been bought up by the emisaries of
the Northern Methodist Church. In
the ignorant zeal ol anew convert,
who., of course, wished to render some
service for his money, he went into the
Suimiierfield District, over which Dr.
A. H. Mitcltell presides and began the
propagation of the perfect equality
doctrine among the colored people.—
This equality he carried beyond lie „
yond , and, as the legitimate immediate
result was, lionized by the negroes.
An old gentleman of the white per
suasion residing in the neighborhood
where this Missionary of Equality was
laboring, saw proper to doubt Mr. TaU
iev’s sincerity, and told a favorable
bov, (an old times house and body
servant, who had imbibed great confi
dence in Mr. Talley as a sincere
equality man,) that he had as well keep
his money (if he bad intended to give
Mr. Talley any.) until he could test his
sincerity. Anew idea struck Jack ;
Mr. Talley was to stay all night at
Jack’s master’s. When he retired to
bed Jack accompanied the Rev. turn
coat to his room and held him in long
conversation on the equality doctrine,
until Mr. Talley w-as fully committed
to it. and thoroughly sleepy, he took off
his coat to get ready for bed. So did
Jack. Boots came next —so did Jack’s
—Talley’s pants off—Jack’s ditto
‘Look here, Jack, what are you up to V
quoiii Mr. Talley.
‘Muffin ’tall sir. Ees goln to be
down so some-fin. dats all. replied Jack.
•What’s that you are going to be down
to ’ said Ins reverence.
•Well I'se go in to bed wid vou, dais
all tb ar is about it. lis jes as good as
you is aoeordin in the Lordh* gospel by
yon, and I is tiret* of sleeptu wie my sell
in tie shuck pen. So I is gwine to
sleep ivul you in master’s bed,’ said
Jack.
.Mi. Talley took a deliberate indig*
nan! survey of Jack from head to foot,
slow ly put on his clothes, went to the
stable, bridled and saddled lus horse
and left that ill; a sadJur and wiser
tnuu.- —Enterprise Stitr.
A. HE AD 0\ RKAItRIDGC.
From the New Orleans Crescent.]
“2 soles with but a single thorf,
2 heart as beets like 1.”
Marridge is that conglomeration o|
the sexes as is considered constitutional
m a!i countries ; hut it is more partic
ularly oue ot the united States, When
a man so far forgits himself as to git
mnrrid, he bids farewell to the Declar
ation of Independence and becomes at
once an honorary member ot the nights
of the garter, an order established bv
tiie Crusaders in the “times that tried
men’s soles.” Marridge grammatically
sperkin’, is a compound conjunction,
and shows the relation between mao
and woman. Accord in to arithmettek,
I don’t see how people make out that
marridge makes two lolks one; for if
you take the cypher (0) woman and
add her to the unit (1) man, it makes
10, unless loggers lie, and Aggers wont
lie in anything else unless it is mar
rid ge !
Different folks have different reasons
for marry in ; some marry for love, some
lor riches, some because they want to,
and some because they can’t help it !
When a man falls in love, he takes to
readin’ the New York Ledger, and
wearin lavender colored kids and patent
leather boots as pinches his toes, and
puttin’ ‘,new mown hay' onto his pocket
handkerchief. Then he fergits la put
sugar into his coffee and mistakes in
his cash account. Then lie takes to
drinkin’ Mrs. Wilson's soothin' syrup
and puttui squills on Ins hair an’ partin’
the same in the middle of the top of his
lied. As the time approaches for him
to be hitched to tlie adored of his
buzzuni he feels as if a eel was crawling
down his back and little cupids with
wings and without any clothes on was
singing the star spangled but*.ner in the
air all around him. Then like the
prodigal sun, he goes on from bad
to wus, until he gits Ins name into the
daily papers under the proper liediu’,
am! tells the world he is united in a
padlok, and that no cards is played,
and sends some gingerhred and pop
beer to the edi or who wishes the hap
py pear long lile and many of ’em !
Then comes the hunny moon and a
bridle trip of Niagary or Mammoth
Cave or the Bridge of Size, After tin's
the hunny moon is moonshine, until a
still small voice announces that there’s
an ‘angel is in the house !’ as the po
ics say ; hut it always seemed to me
more like the D—ickens in the house
when I hear ’em, Altera while there
is a* family jars, which jars ain’t tit to
preserve friendship—they ate ‘of the
earth earthy !’
When Araminla an’ I got married
alter a short courtship of some seven
teen winters, durin which ‘she never
told her love, but. like a worm in the
mud, fed onto her damaged cheek,’ we
had lots of presents of tin ware, short
close, spoons and other we irin’ apparel,
but rather more spoons than an v thing
ells. It was a spoony* lime. But the
short close still lies in the bureau draw
ers a monument and a mockery to boy
ish dreams and disappointed ambisliun !
As the Scorched poio Burns says,
“The best laid schemes of men and mice
Oft gang aglee!”
But Arainiuta and I are drawin’ down
the veil of life together, still lovin’, still
hopin’ that the time will come when
we shall have to provide ail extra spoon
and porringer. Trooly, hope is a sheet
anchor to the sole. Long may she
wave !
But marridge is a divine institooshun,
more so than a repub'iean form of gov
ernment or the dimercratic party. —
Adam cudcnt live without Mrs. Adam,
snaix or no snaix. And becoz they
raised Cain after they was marnd, its
no sine that oth*r folks shouldn’t ‘raise
1 caiu’ in the marrid stait. Becoz they
el up the Lord’s winter apples its no
sine marrid people should make each
other’s hare come out before Ihe usual
time. Marridge is moolual ; and one
can’t git along without the other no
more than a child can teter on a board
without a child at the other end on’t.
Woman to man is like the bob to the
kite ; the more she is attached to man,
the higher he can fli! Marry early an’
marry offen, and when you get a good
wife stick to her like a shoemaker's wax
to a hot stove or Spaulding’s glue to
broken china.
Sich is the law and the profits.
Pieeefully yours,
A. Head.
—“A Distressed Mother” writes to
a western editor for advice, which she
gets —thusly : “The only way to cure
your son of staying out‘late o’ nights,’
is to break his leg3, or else get the
calico he runs with to do your house
work.”
NO. 12.
A Wife’s Power.—The power o! a
wife for good or evil is irrcsiSiahfe.—
Home must be the seat of li ppiucxa, or
it must be unknown. A good wife is
to a man wisdom and courage, aiul
strength, and endurance. A bad one
is confusion, weakuess, ditcointiiuto
ami dispair.
No condition is hopeless when the
wife possesses firmness, decision and
economy. There is no outward pros
perity which can counteract indolence,
extravagance and folly at home. No
spirit can endure bad domestic influen
ces. Man is strong, but his heart is
adamanL He delights in enterprise
and ael'on , but to sustain him lie meeds
a tranquil mind and a whole heart. He
needs his morals in the conflicts of the
world. To recover his equanimity ami
composure, home must be a place of
repose, cheetfulues* peace, comfort: anil
his soul renews its strength again, and
goes forth with fresh vigor to encounter
the trouble ami labors of life. But if
at home fie finds no rest, and is there
inrt with bad temper, sullenness or
gloom, or complaint, hope vanishes,
and fie sinks into despair.
A Tough Story. —We overheard the
following, some time ago, which was
considered by the listeners to be ‘tough.’
especially when it is known that tbo
hero could not be tempted ‘to lie.’
One gentleman was telling of a hen’s
nest that lie constructed with a ‘trap
door’ in the bottom which the weight
of an egg would open. This being
placed on a barrel, ‘the biddie.’ alter
laving one, looked for it, and finding
nothing, laid another, and so continued
to do for several hours.
‘Oil. that is nothing,’ says our friend
from down east, ‘my lather made a
nest of that kind and placed it, with
the lieu upon it, over a hogshead, and
she laid it full of eggs. The next day
he set a dead hen upon the nest and
hatched every* egg in two weeks.’
•And every hatched two chick
ens,’ said a bystander, thinking to add
a good sequel to his story.
•No they didn’t, said Jonathan ; ‘you
needn’t try to make me lie, for you
can’t do it.”
—A story is told of a man named
Walker, who went to a Dutch tailor
and fml his measure taken for a pair of
pantaloons. He gave directions to
liave them made large and full. Walker
was a heavy maw and liked his clothes
loose, and when he came to try on his
unmentionables, found that they stuck
tight to his legs, whereat he thus re
monstrated : “I told you to make tlm
pants full.” After some objurgatory
expressions of a profane nature, the
tailor ended the controversy by de
claring: “I dinks dese bants is full
enough, if dev was anv fuller de would
splilit!”
—A schoolboy ‘down east’ who w >«t
noted among his playfellows for Ins
frolics nmonjj the girls, was reading
aloud in the Old Testament, when
coming to the phrase, “making waste
places glad,” he was asked by the
pedagogue what it meant ? The young
ster paused—scratched his head—but
could give iu> answer ; when up jump
ed a more precocious urchin, and cried
out, “I know vvliat it means, master-
It means hugging the gals ; for Tom
Huos is always hugging ’em around
the waist, and it makes ’em glad as
can be.”
—A minister in a highly elaborated
sermon which he preached, said seve
ral times, “The commentators do not
agree with ine here.” Next morning,
a poor woman came to see him with
something in her apron. She taid her
husband had heard his sermon, and
that it was a very fine one, and as he
said “the common taters did not agree
with him,” he had sent some of the
best kidneys.
—ln a school, recently, a teacher
took occasion to relate an anecdote of
the little girl who tried to ‘iovoreome
evil wtih good,” by giving a Nevv-
Testament to a boy who had ill treated
her. The story was appreciated, for, a
few minutes afterward, one boy struck
another, and, on being asked the reason,
said he was “trying to get a testiincnt.”
This was a practical bearing altogether
unexpected.
—A bewitching little widow out
West gives the following receipt to get
a husband, and if it don't succeed, we
don’t know what would “trap” a fel
low: Invite a nice young man to tea,
set him a laughing every five minutes
during the evening, let him have six
kisses, and you’ll be Ins wife after
twenty similar operations. It was never
yet known to fail when properly ad
ministered.
—lt won’t do to be so devoted to a
tender-hearted Wife as to comply with
Iter request when she asks you, “Now
tumble over the cradle and break your
neck, mv dear, won’t you ?”
—Ladies are like watches—pretty
enough to look at—sweet faces an«|
delicate hands, but somewhat difficult
to regulate when once started agoing,
“Necessity is the mother of invent
tion,” but it has never been accurately
ascertained who is the father,