The morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, June 05, 1887, Page 11, Image 11

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BURGLAR BILL. ITliis recitation was prepared by Punch, and ™ hlisbed wilU the intimation that a pretty unerkui girl might speak it. in Washington coul e to Loudon as au actress. 1 Tntvugh a window in the attic brawny Burglar gill has crept; .. , Stealthily he seeks a chamber where the jewelry He is thrulshed with a jimmy, centre-bit and carpet-bag — For the latter • comes in hand, as he says, to stow the swag.” Here upon Ihe second landing, he secure may 'work his will; Down below’s a dinner party—up above the house is still. Suddenly— in spell-bound horror—all his satis faction ends. For a little white-robed figure by the banister descends! ... Bill has reached for his revolver—but he hesi tates to fire; Child is it, or apparition, that provokes him to perspire? Can it be his guardian angel, sent to stay his hand from crime? He could wish she had selected some more sea sonable time! ‘•Go away!" he whimpered horsely. “Burglars have their bread to earn! 1 don’t need no gordian angel cornin’ givin' me a turn 1” But the blue eyes open wider, ruby lips reveal their pearl; “I is not a garden angel— l is dust a yickle girl! On the thairs to thit I'm doin’ till the tarts and jellies turn; Partinthon, the butler, always thaves for Baby Bella thome! Boor man 'oo is lookin’ 'ungry—leave oo burg ling fiugs up dere; Turn along and have some sweeties, thitting on the bottom thair!” “Reely, Miss, you must excoose me,” says the burglar with a jerk; “Dooty calls, and time is pressing—l must set obout my work!" “Is 'oo work to bweak in houses? Nana told me so, I'm sure! Will 'oo try if 'oo can manage to bweak in my doll's-house door? [ tan never det it undone, so my dollies tan’tdet out; They don't like the fwont to open evewy time they’d walk about. Iwy—and if 'oo does it nicely, when I'm thent upsthairs to theep, [ will bring 'oo up some goodies—which thallbe for 'oo to keep?” Off the little angel flutters—but the Burglar wipes his brow; He is wholly unaccustomed to a kindly greeting now! Jtever with a smile of welcome has he seen his entrance met! Nobody (except the policeman) ever wanted him as yet! Many a stately home he's entered—but, with unobtrusive tact. He has ne'er, in paying visits, called attention to the fact. Gain he counts it, on departing, if he has avoid ed strife. Ah, my brothers, but the burglar's is a sad and lonely life! All forgotten are the jewels, once the purpose of his “job,” As he sinks upon the doormat with a deep and choking sob! Then, the infant’s plea recalling, seeks the nurs ery above, Looking for the Lilliputian crib he is to crack— for love! In the corner stands the doll's house, gayly painted green and red; And the door declines to open—even as the child had said! Out come centre-bit and jimmy, all his imple ments are plied! Peftly now the task’s accomplished—for the door will open well, When a childish voice behind him breaks the silence like a bell— “ Sank 'oo, Missa Burglar, sank 'oo, and, beta use "oo’s been so nice. See, I've hwought ’oo up a tartlett—gweat big gweedies eat the ice! Papa says he wants to see ’oo—Partinthon is tummin', too— Tant too stay?” * * * “Well, not this evenin’, so, my little dear—adoo!” fast he speeds across the housetops—but his bosom throbs with bliss, Kor upon his rough lips linger traces of a baby's kiss! Dreamily on her downy pillow Baby Bella mur r murs sweet: “Burglar, turn adain an' thee me—l will dive 'oo cakes to eat 1” In his garret, worn and weary, Burglar Bill has sunk to rest, Clasping tenderly a damson tartlet to his burly breast! A TRAVELER. The Remarkable Record of a Baggage Master. Prom the Providence Telegram. “Traveled far enough to go around the earth eighty times. Two million miles!” “Yes, sir, that’s about the size of it if your figgerin’s correct.” It was in the baggage car of the Shore Line express train that this fragment of conversation was overheard, and the first speaker looked aghast as he carefully run up the figures he had nude on the back of an old envelope. The tram was rattling along past the fields by Kingston, and on this rainy after noon the baggage car was not the pleasant est place in the world for a conversation. Among the piled up trunks the two men were sitting, and their hiding places were only marked by the wreaths of smoke that curled up from between the Saratogas. The man who had spoken last was an old man, and one worth a second look. He was dressed in the ordinary overalls and jumper, and front beneath his uniform cap, thick locks of white hair curled out giving his smooth-shaven face a setting not to be “asily forgotten. It was Mr. H. S. Baker, through baggage master on the Shore Line express. In the course of the conversation the old man had made mention of the ex tent of his travels. “It was in 1841,” he had said, “that I first went on the Boston and Providence railroad. When I was a little feller I went to sea, but when I got tired of that I settled down here uid have been on the road ever since. I had charge of the baggage and mails. Then when the first .Shore Line train was run, on Dee. 12, 1850, I began to go through from Boston to New York, and have done so ever since. I am about 70 years old. and am as well ** ever. I never drank, and I attend to my own business only, and don’t know or care " hat is going on in any other part of the t rain; that's the conductor’s business. Sonie tmies I don’t even know what engine is drawing us; that’s the engineer's business.” ”1 suppose you’ve been in a good many accidents in your long connection with the Haul!” "Accident*? Well, yes. I have seen some accidents. 1 was counting up the other day and 1 found that I’d been Tn twenty, includ the number of times the train has gone off the track.” “Twenty! And you still live!” “Don't look much like a corpse that’s been bating (j feet under ground in a wooden overcoat, do I? No, sir, but I’ve had some narrow scratches, I tell you. You remem ber the Htcmy creek accident) Well, I was n> that and was in my baggage car as usual, ana was hitched on next to the engine. You "e some fellow had put an obstruction on 'he track right on the bridge. He took a piece of rail and laid it crosswise of the other ’ atls and hitched it there. When the train eamo along (he engineer didn’t see it until lie got close on to it. He whistled down makes immediately. I didn’t know what was up of course,' but I rushed out anil screwed as hard as I could, and then I rushed back into the baggage car and Mummed the door with both hands just as we went oir the trestlo. The roof of the baggage car slid rightoff and ran under the the passenger coach behind, but it ’min t hurt a soul there, although it passed close to the heads of Nome people sitting in the seats there. I was thrown down to the other end of the car under some liaggagr. I tried to catch hold of that big rod tlmt runs i„ U — *°P ot the car, but it’s lucky I misHcd it, or I would have been crushed hen the roof went off and slid through the thiT coach. I got pretty liadly bruised and felt the strain iu my back in a yw, but no bones were broken, z? V* 01 ' to all uiy railroading I never so much as got a finger broken.” r- .Vi nc * when we were running between wnlford and Bamford, two little towns in zzyy°cut, an axle on the engine broke, ®ua throw us off. The trucks held, but tho car was thrown off arid turned th®. ete, y ovor - There were six of us in iiH; carat the time, ami for a moment we t j. 11 “ mixed up with the baggage. When " air tnick we struck, too. and the liag wW'- 4ruck ou ton of us and left all buried beneath it. When the conductor opened tho door he couldn’t see one of us. Wo waru’ts hurt much, but it was pretty lively there for a little while.” “Did I ever jump! No sir. And don’t you jump if you want to be on the safest side. No, sir; that thing would never do. The chances are that if you ever jump you will either be killed or liadly smashed up; so just stick to the ear and take your chances. I he safest way is to grab something station ary. If I can’t get that I just throw myself oil the floor and take things as they come. That’s the reason so many iieople get hurt. They lose their heads and then jump after them I suppose. Just as soon as they hear a whistle at an unusual place, or a bumping up and down, everybody jumps up ana rushes to see what's the matter. That’s where they miss it. If they just sat still and held to their seats their chances would be better and-escape more probable.” “I suppose you've seen some pretty lively traveling in your time?’ “Yes; but that isn’t a circumstance to some of the slow traveling I’ve seen. You know how far it is from Guilford to New Haven? Well, if you don’t, it’s about fif teen miles. I remember once in a snow storm we left Guilford on a Thursday, and we didn’t get into New Haven until the next Saturday. “Queer characters? Yes; I sometimes see some queer characters, and some that are not very welcome. Yes, I have all sorts of persons come in here just as you’ve come in, and they don’t all come in for anv good. Once I found a fellow in here, and 1 knew the minute I put my eyes on him that he was a tough one. He was evidently trying to change checks on trunks, so I ordered him out. He said he wouldn’t go, so I just Sicked up a coupling—we didn't have the idler platform then —and I told him that if he didn’t go before I counted three I would let him nave it.” “Did he go?’ “He went.” “Once in awhile people lose their cheeks. If they would report it to the conductor at once it would save them lots of trouble and time, but they don’t and consequently a trunk sometimes gets into the wrong hands.” “Danger? No, I never think of the dan ger. I never allow myself to. You see when a man gets to brooding over anything his mind gets disordered and he comes to be lieve that what he’s thinking of is so. That’s what makes so many suicides. I feel just as safe here as I would sitting on the top of that hill yonder. Perhajis it’s because I’ve been so long on the trains.” And that was what led to the “flggerin” which called forth the exclamation. “Let us see now about how many miles you’ve traveled. From New York to Boston every day. That’s 282 miles. Six days in the week; that’s 1,392 miles a week.” “Yes, but I didn’t travel every week after the first eighteen months.” “Well, then, for the first eighteen months you got over 108,570 miles.” “Well, I guess that’s so.” And then for the time you’ve run in the twenty-seven years you’ve been with this road you’ve covered 1,691,582 miles. “Well, don’t forget the fourteen years I was with the Boston and Providence road. I can’t tell just how much I run before that, as I was shifted around more, but I guess from what we’ve found now that my four teen years between Boston and New York before that will make up a balance of 2,000,000 miles.” “Why, that’s as good as going around the earth eighty times. Two million miles!” “Yes, sir; that’s about the size of it, if your flggerin’ ’s correct.” NATE MEETS THE QUEEN. An Interesting Interview Between Her Majesty and Col. Salsbury. From the L/misoille Courier-Journal. A private letter, just received, incloses the following from the daily court report published in the London Times : The Queen, accompanied by Prince and Prin cess Henry of Battenherg. paid a private visit to Buffalo Bui’s Wild West snow at Earl's Court in the afternoon. Her majesty drove in a closed carriage from Buckingham Palace at 5 o'clock, and was loudly cheered by crowds of people who had gathered along the route to West Ken sington. The members of the Wild West show went through several of their peculiar per formances, finishing with the spectacle of the attack on the Denver coach. Miss Annie Oakley and Miss Lilian Smith were sent for by her majesty, who spoke a few words of praise to each. At the conclusion of the performance Col. W. F. Cody (“Buffalo Bill”) had the honor of being presented to her majesty, who expressed herself as greatly pleased with the exhibition she had wit nessed. Col. Cody asked her whet her it was too long, to which she replied: “Not at all; she only regretted that her time was so ltmited, and she would like to come again.” Red Shirt (Oglla- Sa) chief of the Sioux, was then presented, and the Queen expressed her pleasure at seeing him. Red Shirt replied that it made him glad to hear it: he had come a long way to see her majesty. Mr. Nate Salsbury. director of the Wild West, was presented to her majesty, who expressed a desire to see the Indian habies or papooses. Two of these were presented for her majesty's in spection, and she was pleased to shake their hands and ]>at their painted cheeks. Her majes ty, after being presented with a bouquet by Miss Whitley, left at about 6:45. The -writer of the letter proceeds thus: “You will gain no idea of this touching spectacle from the meager details given in tne newspapers. When Red Shirt met the Queen there was evident on the face of each that sense of kinship, that mutual recogni tion of superiority, that is always seen when great people meet. It was the unspoken acknowledgment of equal ity. Each saw in the other a ruler of a great people, and their pround hearts beat in unison as Red Shirt lit his pipe and knocked a flea from his flowing blanket. But the most remarkable part of this interview was when Col. .Salsbury was presented to Her Majesty. Col. Salsbury is easily recognizable as one of nature’s noble men, a fact that immediately put him on a free-and-easy footing with the Queen. “‘I supjxise you never met a queen be fore?’ said her majesty. “ ‘The he —, beg pardon, the deuce I didn’t,’ said Col. Salsbury. ‘I met four of ’em once, when I had got a king full, and I’m not likely to ferget it.’ “‘And had you really got a king full?’ asked the Queen innocently and with some indignation. “Yes, ma’am, said Nate, 'full as a little red wagon—full on aces.’ “The Colonel’s evident familiarity with kings and queens served to put her majesty stillmore at her ease, and after expressing her regret that kings were, after all, subject to some of the frailties of ordinary mortals, she inquired of Col. Salsbury how he liked Indians. ‘“I like ’em fried,’said that gentleman, ‘though they are not bad when pickled and cooked in white wine.’ “ ‘I fear you misapprehend me,’ said tho Queen, suppressing an inclination to shudder and evidently bent on a<-quiring informa tion; “I mean, how do*you like their com pany j* *“‘Their couqiany!’ exclaimed Nate, ‘it ain’t their company; it’s mine, mine and Cody’s. Why those red-skinned devils don’t own the knile they would scalp you with, unless they stole it.’ “At this iK)int in the conversation several Indian children ran up to Col. Salsbury. and addressing him as‘Little Father,’asked for pennies with which to buy buns. Mut tering the word ‘kraps,’ Col. Salsbury told the children to ‘chase themselves into a wig wam,’ which they did. Then the Queen asked Col. Salsbury to fetch her some Indian babies. He went off and returned with a papoose on each arm. One of them began to cry just as her majesty was looking to see how many teeth it had, whereupon a child handed the ‘Little Father’ a bottle, which he tenderly inserted into the little babe’s mouth, thus keeping it quiet while the Queen graciously explored the other pa- will do; thank you kindly,’ said her majesty. As she turned away she said to the rrmoess Beatrice: ‘What strange people these Americans are. Col. Salsbury looks young to be the father of so many little Indians; but, then, perhaps hes a Mor mon l)er me; I wonder if he fries his own babies! Indeed, I hope not.’ “Somehow, the Colonel did not soem pleased, as he tamed and saw Buffalo Bill Luwug a quiet lauji all b^rtumscU. TUIRMHHI NEWS: SUNDAY*.,!! AE 5, 1887 —TWELVE PAGES. JOHN HOLMES’ FINE FAMILY. Four Wives, Five Children and One Mother-in-Law. Regarding John Holmes, of Plainfield, N. J., and his numerous wives, mentioned in the Morning News a few days ago, a dis patch to the New York Times says: Four women have appeared here since Monday who claim to be wives of John Bute Holmes, who was buried on that day. How many more may appear seems not to lie known. Holmes lived out on a farm about two miles from here, in Washington valley, and was a surveyor doing business at 39 Nassau street, New York. He would have been 69 years old had he lived until next Wednesday. He died last Thursday rather suddenly, and although he had beeu ill for a few days Dr. Fritts, the attending physi cian, refused to give a death certificate. Cor oner Sutphin, of Somerville, was called in. He deliberated a day and concluded that Holmes died of cerebral apoplexy. A cer tificate was given to that effect. The day Holmes died his young wife Katie went to his office and removed his valuable maps and papers. The same day also Mrs. Browning came here from New York in re sponse to a telegram from her young son, Charles Holmes. Mrs. Browning, who was formerly Mary Sullivan, was at one time Holmes' wife, and the boy is her son and had always lived with him. Katie and her mother, Mrs. Meadows, wore greatly sur prised when this person turned up at the house. She gave them a few items in Holmes' history which opened their eyes. Katie again went to New York on Saturday and consulted her lawyer. On her return she informed Mrs. Browning that she must leave the place. This she quietly did after stat ing long enough to show that she would do as she pleased. Sunday brought another delegation, con sisting of Mrs. Williamson, another of Holmes’ wives, and her three children. They came to join another child who was already on the place. On Monday the fu neral occurred, only the last wife, the child ren and the neighbors being present. The other wives refrained 1 from participating in the services. In the afternoon the wives re turned to New York, leaving the children on the place. In the evening the circus commenced. Katie came to town and made a complaint before Justice of the Peace Charles Austin that Hannah Williamson and her children— Grace Wright, Harry Wright, Walter Wright and Wallace Wright—and Mary Browning and her child, Charles Sullivan, had threatened her with bodily harm and with burning down the buildings on the farm. Three constables proceeded to the place and brought the five children to town. They were taken before the Justice aliout l* o’clock in the evening and with no one to represent them a hearing was given. Katie and her mother testified that one of the women had threatened to horsewhip Katie, and that the children had also taken an inning in the threatening game. Charles Sullivan, they said, baiTicaded himself in the library, and, after amusing himself by tearing up valuable maps and papers, bad leveled a pistol at the young stepmother’s head anil warned that if she. testified against his mother in court he would use her head for a target. Various other antics were in dulged in until Katie and her mother con cluded it was time to round up. The Wright children were discharged by tile Justice, but Charles Hulli van was held in $5O to keep the peace. No one appearing to hlp him out of the scrape, he reposed in the borough lockup over night. The next day Mrs. Browning and Mrs. Williamson returned from New- York in response to telegrams auil were greatly incensed at the treatment their children had received. As the consta bles were ignorant of the names of the women, and they declined to inform them, the warrants against them remained unexe cuted. By the efforts of a lawyer- the Sul livan boy was released, and also the eldest Wright boy, who is an imbecile, and had been committed to the char”A of the Over seer of the Poor. They all returned to New York that evening. Yesterday Mrs. Anna M. Holmes, the genuine first wife, appeared and, accompa nied by her counsel, Arthur P. Miller, pro ceeded to Somerville, the county seat, and tiled application l>efore Surrogate Long for letters of administration on Holmes’ estate. Katie’s lawyer, John H. Van Winkle, had previously written the Surrogate that she would apply for letters of administration in a few days. The contest now as to the property, therefore, lies between the fli-st wife, aged 54, and the last wife, age 19. How many counter claimants between these tw-o ages "that may come in is hard to tell. The estate is placed by conservative people at about S'JO,OOO, although the claims may amount to as much. A largo portion of the estate consists of personal property. Holmes married his first wife in Ireland in 1838, when she was Ift. In 1875, after living apart from him for many years, she secured a limited divorce. He was once a candidate for Alderman in the First ward, in New York, and in the campaign preceding the election killed a policeman who tried to ar rest him. He was indicted for manslaugh ter, but the jury disagreed and the charge was dropped. He was sentenced to fifteen years for forging Ida Kerr’s name to some deeds. Nile was living with him at the time as his wife. He was pardoned when he served five and a half rears by the efforts of his half sister, Wright. He rewarded her afterward by seducing her and they lived together as man and wife for many years on nis farm here. Four children were Lorn to them. He was once sued for breach of promise by Mary Chamlierlin anil a judgment of AIi.OOO was given against him. But a fifth of this sum was paid when Holmes talked sweet to her and she dropped the matter and went off with him again. Another of his wives was Mary Nulnvau. He had known her from the time she was a baby. Hhe was eutrapfted by bis story of being a widower ana married him. She lived with him a number of years but finally left him when she could stain! his abuse no longer. Nltr has remarried and is living happi ly. Gertie Barlow, who lovod to iiiHspucrade in man's attire, was another presiding genius at the farm. She was entirely too much for Holmes to handle and he let her go. Then there was Jenuie Morgan, the song anddnnee artist, and Dora, the cisik, ami hosts of oth ers. Last December he advertised for a governess and pretty Katie Meat lows an swered the advertisement. Her mother was averse to her going alone in the country with a widower, anil so Holmes made love to the young girl and they were married in two weeks. She converted him to the Ho man Catholic faith and they attended ser vice together faithfully. His neighbors say that his young wife had reformed him. Hfe had stnpi>ed drinking and seemed to have settled down. VICTORIA’S GOLD COACH. Not to be Used in the Jubilee Procea sion-Ita Beauty All Outside. from the Boston Globe. The great gold coach of state is not to be used iu the Queen's jubilee procession. It was last used in the year Prim* Albert died, when the Queen went to opon Parliament in person. It would have been a great feature in the celebration, as it is 24 feet long without the pole anil 40 feet with it, ami weighs four tons. The jmiiels are exquisitely painted by Cipriani; at the four corners are huge gold tritons, and at the top three figures repre senting England. .Scotland and Ireland sup porting the royal crown. The interior fittings of the coach are tats to red and ragged with age, anil consider able time would be required to replace them. As it practically has no springs, the body Iwing suspended from brood leather straps, it is a perfect, and ingenious instru ment of torture, pitching as It goea lika a small skiff in a choppv tea. This ought to suit the Queen, as aha is said to abhor car riage springs, and even hashed a device ap plied to her carriage to prevent its rocking when she gets in. How vain the loving dart* that Ay From e'en the moat Switching eye, Unlew the t-eth are pure and bright And ever ket>t a snowy white If you would nave your teeth from harm, SLEEITXG-CAR POUTERS. THE WAGES PAID AND SOME THING ABOUT TIPS RECEIVED. An Ex-Porter Tells a Sad Story as to the Treatment of Porters by the Com panies-Pined for Every Little Of fense or Neglect—Compelled to For age on tho Public to Eke Out a Liv ing. From the Chicago Tribune. Sleeping-car porters are believed in some quarters to lie the most rapacious of all the tip-seeking class. For a decade the car por ter has been the object of the wrath of the traveling public, the sport of the newspaper paragraphers, the possessor of the dislike of all traveling women, who never give tips, and has been regarded in a kind of hap hazard way as embodying all the evils of mendicancy supplemented by tho skill of Dick Turpiniam. Sleeping-car porters have also been known as “robbers of the road,” and each and every one is supjiosed to have a goodly amount of government bonds stowed away fer a rainy day. Avery intelligent colored man came into the office yesterday. He said: “I want to say a word for the sleeping-car porter. I see lots of paragraphs going about in the ]lapel's I pick up in tho car, and it seems everybody is down on the pirter liecause he expects 25c. for a night’s attendance and bootblacking. Will you let me say tuy say?” “Most certainly,” said a reporter, “and be glad to do It. We have been waiting for a story from your side. Now is your oppor tunity.” The colored man is perhaps 35 years of age, and has been a sleeping-oar pater for twelve years. He says he has gotten through with the business and now proiioses to do something else for a livelihood. “I have read jokes about the class I once belonged to till I’m tired. Now ( I want to give the other side. Will you listen to that!” “With pleasure.” “Well, now, I waut the traveling public to understand that the car-porter is the worst treated of the laboring class of people. Persons who travel constantly understand this well and are our sympathizers, and help us out, but the great bulk of people think we are a shoal of sharks. It is not true, sir. The sleeping-car porters are for the most part a deserving class and ought, to have a more favorable recognition. What I want to say first,, sir,” said the colored man as he drew his chair up closer, “what do you think of a rich corporation paying their men but an average of $l5 a month? Some men get a little more, some get, less, but the average is about .$l5. Out of that we are supposed to live on the road, sup port families if we have them, buy uni forms, pay fines, and work on an average eighteen hours a day.” “0, but you are supposed to help this out by your tips.” “’That is just what I want to talk about. Do you think a great corporation, ismsting its millions or more surplus, ought to for<v its servants to get their support from the public on tips?” The argument, was unanswerable. “But,” continued the ex-porter, “that is not all. Even the meagre salary they prom ise you is usually kept back in the shiq>e of fines, ‘shortages,’ ana so on. In the first place, a porter is supposed to be with his car as long as it is ‘on wheels,’ so to speak— that is, as tong as it is in motion. Most of the work is of course at night. The ]>orter must be up and wide awake at all hours. If a spotter, and" there are plenty of them on the road, catches him napping it is *5 fine—one-third of his month’s salarv. If a spotter again re ports him he is discharged and all his salary due is taken. Smaller fines are imposed, ranging from a cent to $l, which often eat up the whole month’s pay. The most fre quent sources of fine Is the linen of the car. If a towel is missing the poor porter is charged 50c. Now we know how often la dies have to use extra linen. They don’t stop to think, but take it. The porter is charged 50c. for every piece missing. If a wisp-broom getsßost it means 50c. fine. Houp they don’t charge us for, which is a wonder. The buffet-car porters are charged twice the retail price for every glass or piece of crockery they break, for every napkin that gets lost, and for every ounce of provisions not accounted for as calculated on the nar nowest basis.” “Then there does not seem to be much in the car-porterage profession except it be from tips i ” “There is mighty little in that, the way the thing is running. The public have got a little mad at the meanness of the car com panies, and a good many more ten-eent pieces get into our hands than quarters. A good many people scowl when the wisp broom approaches, and as for ludies—well, they never give us anything. They think we are paid g<*xl salaries and ought to be content with that.” “What is about the average income of the car porter, taking hif> salary free from fines and his tills f” “It will run from $43 to $75 a mouth. But I want to say that his salary ought not to count, for in seven eases out of ten the salary is eaten up by fines and shortages. But the income depends on the run. The liest run Is between Chicago and Ht. Louis. A porter can on that run, if he is lucky on fines and hasn’t too many towels and liaie kins to account for, make $75 a month. But that’s the only run in the country of its kind.” “What makes it so valuable?” “It's short—it’s simply all night. The cars are always full aml every passenger is good for a quarter, or a dimejat least. “How are the long runs —don’t they pay the liest? Hay the New York limited—isn't that pretty good?” “Bless you, no. The limited on all the roads is the worst that is sent out. It is supi>oHed to be tho best for ti|m, considering the class of travel, so the companies only I>ay $l2 or so u month on that train, but you don’t get it. You see there is only one night out. Now you can’t get more’n a quarter for a one-night ruu, I don’t care how rich aud liberal the traveler is; and then you’ve always got to discount the ladies. As l said before, ladies never ;ay anything. We can brush the nap off th ir cloaks, but they don’t see the point,. Lots of times I’ve bmshed till I’ve got tired aud the only re maril was a request to got the twiby a glass of ice-water or a demand in <arry out that dead lunch-hamper. 1 don't go much on ladies as jmssengers.” “But you think Ht. Ixmis is the best run?” “Yes. Ht. Paul comes next on ordinary trains, but the fast train, no! You see, tho ordinary trains stop often-ir, get on more passengers, and the quarter is nimbler. Those trains arc worth about a month, including salary, if it is not taken from you. ' “How are the very long runs, like those to the Pacific const?” “They’re no good as a regular thing. It was reported once that tho bonanza silver people wero giving the boys $5 gold-pieces and the wages were cut from $2O down to $l5 a month. Tho I sirs were not getting any such money. Once in a while when John Mackey or Henator donee cauie over th porter got a couplo of geld pieces, but it was no reg’lar thing. Fifty cents is about the average on the ruu from Omalut to Ogden; you can’t get more than that—or at least can’t count on it. That whole run ain’t worth more than $5O n month." The colored man then spoke of another thing. “We are compelled to go to a tailor who has a contract with the company. We have to jiay him $25 for such blue suits us you travelers see us w<ar. There isn’t another tailor hi Chicago that would not make them up of better material tuid shape lier cut for $2O. We have to pay $2 tti for our caps, and tboee we ore compelled to take from the storehouse. I lost mine once and had to get a new one. I bad it made at a Clark street place for justtl, and It was a prettier and better cap than tin) storehouse can produce. Our winlsr suits we have to pay $3O for from the company's tailor. Just $7 5?) more than we can gel them for elsewhere of better material and better •iiji/ip .. . . - ——■ i J ■’ ' f 'HK • , “But.” continued the colored man, “there are other iietty exactions. These come from t he porters responsibility for the company’s linen and other proj>erty. It has become a rule that porters at terminal stations and also en route must clean their spittoons, buffets and silver inside of the cars. It takes from two to three hours to do this work. If the porter sto]is to do it ho will have but little time to rest and be at home with his family. There is but one of two things left to do—he must lose his rest or must hire someone to do the work for him. The companies make it a joint to have a man or two around whom the porter can pay to do the work if he can em ploy him. Usually the porter can get his lamps cleaned for 35c., his spittoons for Hoc., and his silver for half a dollar, but the buffet the porter must clean himself. The porteis who run into New York, Jersey City and Philadelphia have to pay more than these rates. In Jersey City, unless the jxtrter wants to wait from one to this*' hours to exchange his soiled linen for dean, he has to pay a man whom the companies keep around 85c. of his hard-earned money. Por ters running into the Union depot in Chica go have to pay from 15c. to 25c. to have the company's linen taken from their cars to the linen room. There is no way to got around paying this money, for the traius do not re mam in the depot long enough for the porter to carry the linen himself. These are some of the indirect ways in which the much-abused and ill-used porters are de frauded of their paltry pittance.” “Arc all companies alike in these exac tion*;" “Yes.” “How nliout the roads that run their own cars, like the Wisconsin Central, Milwaukee and Lake Shore, mid othersf" “They usually pay $4O or $45 a month, and don’t expat us to take tij>s. But, dear me!” exclaimed the colored man, “there's mighty few of those roads now. I know several instances where a sleeping-car com pany put its cars on roads that bad before employed their own and who were paying good wages This company nt, once cut the porters down to $l5 a month, and laid forage on the public.’” “And so you have been doing it? 1 ’ “What else is there to do, when you have a family and are compelled to support your self on the rood f” To this question there seems to lie no re ply, unless oue can be furnished by the sleeping-car companies. From the New American Dictionary. Burdette in Brooklyn Kngle. Author—A man who scissors the distance tables out of a railway guide, the iiopulatiou of cities from the I'ensus, an article on “Vol canoes” from the encyclopedia, the rule* of Wise ball from a newspaper alma nac and then publishes it under the title of “(ferns of Thought and Mines of Knowl edge.” The term was formerly applied also to a person who wrote a book; in this sense it is now obsolete. Beauty, Professional—Hee Advertising Agency. Congress—A benevolent association, or ganized for the pur|*ise of supporting the Congressional Record and denying what ever nuiv lie printed therein. See, also, ar ticle on Natural Has. Critic—See Manager. Divorce—See Chicago. Drouth—See Prohibition. Duel —A fashionable amusement, former ly considered dangerous, but now quite popular among the lesure classes on account of its assured harmlossness. It is highly reooinmemle(l by physicians for all persons who are too weak to play IHi.se Will. Kgg—A tribute of respect and admira tion. See 1 .lecturer. Fun—See Boys and “Headache.” Gum, Chevviug—A course of study at a girls’ school; see also, caramel and bed-head. Horse—A (implication of strange dix eases that develop immediately after the sale, See ‘‘Taken In” and “Honest Far mer.” Independent—Oue who always takes the other side to show that ho can’t be influ enced. Judge—A title of honor applied to gentle men who held stop watches and have the best seats at horse races; in uncivilized communities sometimes applied to persons who preside at the sessions of courts of justice. Kicker—A man who never originates any thing or suggests anything and op;x>*e,s everything anyone else suggests. See “Mule.”, Lady—A female who takes in washing, does kitchen work or waits on hotel tables. Major—A citizen of Georgia. Narcotic —See “Sermon.” Onion —A drug for strengthening the breath; much used by confidential people whom you cordially, dislike and who are forever trying to whisper something to you which you do not wish to know. Professor —Any one except an instructor in a college or university; usually a horse tamer or dancing master; sometimes a corn doctor. Quart —A unit of measure applied to the size of the hip pocket in Kunsax; a flask which holds about enough for five men In Boston, three in Ohio and one iu Arkansas. Rider—ln England, a man who tries to fall off a horse; in New York, a mail w ho doe* fall off. See “Bounce” and “Buck.” Talk—A singular sound produced by opening it vacuum; a disease often tutu 1 to Presidential candidates, who are apt to be attacked by it iinliss restrained by their friends. See “Lockjaw.” Umbrella —A myth of the Nineteenth Century; a piece of portable property that cannot lie held in severally; something which you luivo not, or if you have, it is not yours; that whicli*rannot be kept. See, also, “Thief.” Vanity—The quality by which a man is enabled to lightly intend the long stairway to the editorial room with a i*>em. Wrath —The quality that enable* him to go down again half the time. Witness—The priueiiial victim in any criminal trial: one who is forbidden by American law to say what he saw or repeut wliat be heard. See “Brow beat” and “Badger." X—Something which we do not liappen to have about us for a couple of days. Zslinc--A procession of animals on the cover of the almanac; the interior depart ment on street, jiarade; merely introduced into the language as iiart of a scheme to enable the letter izz'tru to make itself useful; nuft zed. _____ Mrs. Langtry as a Typesetter. t'jnni the .S I. Paul Ulohe. The next visit, was to the cotiqxietng room, where the fuir Inly became much interested in the work of t\ pe-etting. Here again she asked the privilege of setting tyjxt, which was granted. Heated at a case Mrs. Langtnr went to work iu tn# journalistic style. It did not take her long to memorize the loca tion of the alphabet boxes, and in less tbun half an hour she hail set the following sentence of her own construction, and which is printed here from the identical typo as it was set by her: * “The Globe Build 'ay is the crowning glory of Hi. Paul." • The only qtuwtlou she axked while work ing at the case was as to whether she siioutd siwll “Saint" out in full or abbreviate it. When informed that it wax the rule of ull well-regulated newspaper establishments to abbreviate she smilingly returned thanks and went to work again. Another “Combine" Strike for $16,000. The Quaker City ha* several times shown the falsity that ‘ lightning never strike* twice in the same place.” Not long ago a combination of Lombard and South street* railroad conductor* drew $15,000 in The Lnmtiana State Lottery, but the drawing on Tuaaday, April 12, ha* proven a still greater windfall in one-tenth of the $150,- OCKi capital prise, to a combination of thir teen men employed by the firm of Goodsll k Waters, machinery manufacturers, Ham ilton. above Fifteenth streets. M<xit of the member* of the club, although not in want, are men of very moderate means, and the $1,158 whlrh each will soon receive, will, no doulit, lie put to g<Mxl urn.—Philadelphia Avarice la What the Fakir Banks Upon. From the Hew York Sun. “The foundation on which every sharper works is avarice,” said the some fakir, after lighting a fresh cigar, “and he is as apt to catch the citizens of a big town as the fann er living by himself. 1 was attached to a circus for several seasons, and my statistic* proved that the biggest share of my money came from towns; x*ople. I had a wheel of fortune, two or three patent medicines, a prize drawing, etc., and I have taken more money at once out; of a lawyer or merchant thou out of a countryman. It is curious how all sorts of people will in vest their money on a wheel, of fortune. There never was one mude which didn’t give the operator 75 per cent, advantage to begin with, and by trickery this advantage is increased 15 or 20 percent. You must know that the operator has things so tlxed that he can stop the wheel at will. In a town in Rhode Island a member of the Common Council, who was accounted one of the sharpest men in the locality, left $2OO with me before he quit my wheel. If there is any raffling or dice shafting, it is all fixed, of course. In the prize draw ings, you may find gold and silver watches and sums of money displayed, but these cannot by any possibility be drawn. “I know several men who have grown rich and retired from business on the sale of liver invigorators and consumption cures. Both remedies are made of the same mate rials, to-wit: Water, whisky and one or two extracts. In Dayton, 0., a fakir connected with our show sold 180 bottles of liver invig orator and 208 Ditties of consumpt ion cure in four hours, and not over ono-quarter of the lot was sold to farmers. When you appeal to a man’s avarice you hit him hard; when you get him to thinking his liver is out of order, or that he is con sumptive, you can take his last. cent. You have seen the glass bulbs tilled with reddish fluid which fakirs claim to test the blood with; Any one of average sense must know they are frauds, but 1 have seen the Ixwt physicians in a town pay theiwten cents with the rest. Alxmt the only thing con nected with the outside of a circus which is not a fraud on the public is the electric bat tery. That’s all right, and the owner will give you all your money calks for, and some times more. “Now, take the throe-card monte business or thimble rigging. Those two games have been worked tor the last, fifty years r : ver the United (State*, and tin’ public b en warned against them tens of thou <f times. They are still the most p. Ii games to be worked. Even old gamblers are enticed to liet. Several years ago, while I wax taking a vacation at. a health resort in Wisconsin, a couple of the frater nity called for my assistance to help ‘work’ a farmer. The intended victim was a sharp, keen man, about 30 years old. He had lieen everywhere and was up on all dexige*. He bad been tried with the gold brick and treas ure dodges, but had remsed to bite. We held a council and decided upon’a plan. He had three or four fine horses for sale, and the trio of us drove out to his place to make a purchase. We were Illinois utex-k raisers and horsemen, and it was apparent that lie sized us up for sharp fellows. One of my companion*, whom I will call Jitn, did most of the talking, and he alone deaired to do the buying. Jack and myself sat down on an old hay rack hi the barnyard, and scarcely noticed tho horses as they were )>uradrd up and down in front of us. At the proper time Jack took out his cards and lxgaii to show me how to play them. I Ix't hini that I could pick out the card, and we began to talk in loud tones and attract attention. The farmer Anally came over. He knew all alxiut the game and smiled in pity at the ida of lx-ing caught, but in less than ten minutes, ami that, without, any urging from any of us, he had bet and won $lO. That was the entering wedge. He was allowed to win $BO, and then cleaned out of $4O. His spirit of avarice van now thoroughly aroused, and I’m telling you the solemn truth when 1 say that he put, up the hortes and walked into the house and brought out a bag containing $OOO in gold. He sat down with gretxly eyes and little lip* and won and lost until we had his last dollar. There was no explosion when he had parted with bis last gold piece. On the contrary, he volun teered the statement that all liiul been fair and above board. An afterclap always ac companies such event*, however, and we got out of the State just as he bad secured warrants for our arrest. “The safest game worked in the country to-day is the counterfeit money dodge, and a goodly number of fakir* are rolling qp fortunes by it. 1 supply myself with a lot of new greenbacks—ones, twos and five*— and then appear in some small towns as an agent, or detective, or a stranger seeking recreation. It require* only a few days to size up tho people. In every town of 3,000 inhabitant* there are half a dozen men who are ready to ileal In the queer if it can be done sufely. The money I have with me is, you understand, js'rfectly good. When I have selected my man I exhibited the money as counterfeit. I am quietly supplying the ‘stuff 1 to a few gixxl fellows at so much on the dollar. Before he buy* 1 give him a bill to take to the port office or bank. It pusses without question, uud lie 1* elated. I am ready to leave a dollar bill with him as a sample, but if ho gives me un order to lx> filled two weeks later he must, pay me a certain sum in advance, Nay $4O on the hun dred. To prove to him that, 1 have hi* in terests ami safety at heart, I produce a la;x*r in which he make* me his financial agent to receive and receipt for all moneys. Then I give him mv note of hand, due some weeks ahead, for whatever money he pays me, ami lie rests assured that the law cannot trouble him. His order is never tilled, of course. Hup;xme he kicks. He has given me ;x>wer of attorney. I have not hud a dollar of the queer in mv pos session. The document i an effect ual lair to hi* recovering or prosecuting. I have seen two or three tests of it, ami the fakir came out with flying colors m each instance. Iu ninety-nine case* out of 100, however, the victim lanes whatever he has advanced without a thought of raising u row. He has lieen caught ill bad conqiaiiY. He intended to swindle his neighbor*. He is amenable tel the law. He is glail enough to let the matter drop and say no more alxmt it. ami the fakir goes from mixture to ;iasture and rolls up a fat bank account. VYHen you read in some newspaper of the sharpness anil eliteness of the American jieople, just remember what. 1 have told you. No poo pie are swindled of teller, and none hunger so badly for the fakir and his tricks.” Love Laughs at Look*. From the Apatochicoki Times. last Tuesday our community w •* all agog over the sensational elopement of Mr. M. J. Bruce ami Mias Annie Rogers, who hied awuy to Bristol on the steamer Throna teeekn, where they secured tile necejeary license, and were united for weal or for wcxj. It stem* that some time ago these young people formed an ardent attachment for each other, but that their suit was not looked upon by Miss Annie Hunter, the guardian of Miss Rogei*, with favor. Not withstanding this opposition the young (ample loved on, ami their attachment increased daily, and, finally, they de cided that a stem guarflian should not ke*;i them se;xirate longer, so on Tuesday Miss Roger* left a neighbor's house where she bad prepared for the emergency anil re paired tei the Thronateeska, a short while fadore tho steamer’s departure, where she was mot by the groozu -elect. A* luck would have It, Miss Hunter heard of these move ments before the steamer left the dock, ami she immediately hurried after the fleeing couple, but did not find her neioe aboard the steamer, that young My having locked herself In her state-room. Fail ing to reach her niece, Mis* Hunter returned home and the steamer nailed up the river, carrying the bride and groom expectant to Bristol where they were, as before stated, quietly married, when they returned borne by the lost steamer The groom, Mr. M. J. Bruce. Is quite an exem plary young man amt he lias a host of friends here. He is a fine mechanic, tem perate and industrinue, and will make the young My a gixxl hiixliand. Mis* Roger* is quite jin -tty and winsome, an(\ is popular BROWN’S IRON BITTERS. DYSPEPSIA la a dsoiwo^ellMdi ,r c"* i u oompLtoA. S nuglis-tMI. it tends, by unpairin* nutrition, and da pressing riic tone of the zyatem, to prepare the wag lor Rapid Decline. A BBM’g | | I ll S \ fulokly and completely Cures l)yn|fpia in all it* forma, Heartburn, Bdrhing. TaHtlna tbA Food, etc. Itenrichee and pnrifles theblo'd.lin*Q latee the appetite, and aids tne aatdniiletion of flsod. Rkv. J. T. Rossrrxß, the honored pastor of the First Reformed Church, Baltimore. Md.. aa.yt: “ Having used Brown’s Iron bitters tor Dyspepsia and- Indigestion I take great pleaaare in raot-m -mendlng it- highly. Al> consider it a splendid tonic and inviv-*rator. nnd very etrongthenlna.’* Hon. Joskph O. Burs, judge of Circuit Oooit Clinton 00., Ind., Bays: ’* T bear moat cheerful teati- Fionjr to the efficacy of Brown’s Iron Bitten foi >yapepeia, and aa a tonic.’* Cjoutline baa above Trad*- Mark and croeaed red UzmA cn wrapper Take no other. Made only by fIUOWN tdEMlt Al CO., BAH IMOKIC MA LOTTKR Y. UNPRECEDENTED ATTRACTION' U Over a Million Distributed. CAPITAL PRIZE, $300,0001; L.S.L.I LOUISIANA STATE LOTTERY COMPANY. Incorporated by th Legi'.’afcure in fofr Educational and* Charitable purpoflM, and ft* franchise fnadc a part of the present State cot** stitution, in 1879, by an overwhelming popular vote. I|m Grand Single !\umber l)riwlng take place monthly, and the Heml-Annual Draw |ii2N reatilarly every alx mouths (.June and December), “ We do hereby certify that we supervise. the arrangement 8 for all the Monthly and Semi- Annual Draw ays of the Louisiana State Lot tery > omjKiny, and m person manage and con trol the Drawings themselves, and that the same are conducted tcith honesty, fairness, and ia good faith toward all parties, and ice the Company to use this certificate, with /fljjjj similes of our signatured attached, in its aavM H tuements." CommimiionwJ HV the undersigned Rank, and Banker, pay all Prize, dratrn in the Louisiana State terie, which may he presented at our countem ß J, H OGLESBY, Pres. Louisiana Nat’l Banfl PIERRE LANAUX, Pres State Nat'l Ban* A. BALDWIN, Pres. New Orleans Nat’l CARL KOHN, Pres. Union National Banfl GRAND SEMI-ANNUAL DRAWINi In the Academy of Music, New Orleans, TUESDAY. June 14. 1887. .B Capital Prize, $300,000. || 100,000 Ticket* at Twenty Dollar*each. $lO, Quarters Tenths $2, Twentieths $l. K LIST or PHIZES. 1 PRIZE OF $BOO,llOO Is infl i PRIZE OF 100,0001* 100.* 1 I’RIZE OF 60,000 is SO.cH 1 PRIZE OF 25,000 is 25,01 P 2 PRIZES OF 10,000 are 20,000 5 PRIZES OF 5,000 are 25,000 26 PRIZES OF I.OCO are *>,ooo 100 PRIZES OF 500 lire 60,000 200 PRIZES OF SC# are 00,0 51)0 PRIZES OF 2W> are 100,0 APPROXIMATION PKT/KH. 100 Prizes of $6OO approximating to $BOO,OOO Prize are 80,0 100 Prizes of $BOO approximating to $lOO,OOO Prize are 80,0 100 Prizes of $2OO approximating to $50,000 Prize are 20,0< TCI.MISAI. PRIZES. 1,000 Prizes of $lOO decided by . .$300,000 Prize are 100,0 1,000 Prizes of $lOO decided by. $lOO,OOO Prize are 100,0 8,180 Prizes, amounting to sl,ofidp For clutis rates or auy further infornuitk apply to the undersigned. Your iimidwrltin must be distinct and Signature plain. Mot rapid return mail delivery will be assured h your enclosing an envelope bearing your full ai dress. Send POSTAL NOTES, Express Money O drrg, or New York Exchange in ordinary lette Currency by Express (at our expense! tu dressed M. A. New Orleans, La. or M. A. D\l PIIIN, Vtaeblngton. O. C. Address Registered Letters to NEW ORLEANS NATIONAL B \N’K, .\ew Orleans, La. RrMPMRFR That the prmeaoe of Gen ■* IYI C. IVi DCL i \ era i M Beauregard and Early, who are in charge of the drawing*, a giiaaunfot* of abMoluto fumi**** and integrity, that the (diaiiCHs are all et(ual. ami that no ond can poaeibly diviue what number will draw a Prize. KKMKMIIKK that the payment of all Prizo# Ik Gl \R WTtCKD 11V FOt H *ATIO*AL MAAKri of New Oilcan*, and the Ticket** are signed by the President of an Institution. wh*Ml chartered rights are recognized in the highest Court*; therefore. lie ware of any kuitatioua uj* am mymoiiH schemes. QU Warranted to txratain PURE GOLD. Price $l. RUBY^iIDING, The exact color of English Sterling bold. THICK 50c. Uhl by over 1.300 Manufacturers anil Gilders. Time splendid products have beeu before the public Hfnoe 1870, and they have invariably been awarded the biglieHt prize wherever exhibited. They were used to decorate the splendid lonne* of W. H. Vanderbilt. Judge Hilton, (ten. Urant, anti many other wealthy and dletiie guixhed New Yorker*. They are ready for if stunt use and may be uaed by the moat iuexp rlenced ainaleur. E( )R 1,.\ Id EH.—Either of the above to invalua ble for Gliding Kruno's, Furniture. Cornices Baskets, Kans, Photos, bilk Mottoes. Decorative Painting, etc. Any one cun use them. Auk for Williams' Gold or Ruby's Gilding, and refuse all substitutes. Sold by ull Art Dealers and Druggists. ‘ New York ('hemical Mfg (Jo., 8 E. 4 th at,. N. Y [Either will be sent by mail for 8c extra.J PENNYROYAL PILLS. •CHICHESTER’S ENGLISH." The Original and Only Gent lue. Safe and always Reliable. Beware ot 'Orthlee* Imitations. Indispensable to L.AUII2A. Ask your Druggist for “Chleheater’s English" and take no other, or inclose 4c. I stamp) to un for particulars in Utter by return iitsil. HSIK PAPER. 4 hlrliesler Chemical Cos.. ■ J 51.1 Vlndi.ou Square, I'lillada, pfl bold by llrUKiti.ls every where, Ank for *‘Cl| 11