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C|t^lflrntngDieto
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FRIDAT, SEPTEMRKR J, 180._
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INDEX TQ NEW ADY^BTLSEME-VTS.
■Railroad Schedule— Savannah, Florida and
Western Railway.
Consignment This Day— A. Ehrlich A Bro.
Auction Sales— Meats, by l. D. La Roche A
Bon.
Cheap Column Advertisements Help
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For Rent; For
Sale: Lost; Personal; Miscellaneous.
Chewing gum, says a prominent physi
cian, sometimes causes weak minds. That
is a mistake. It merely indicates them.
China doesn’t like railways. They like
um ride allelite, hut they are afraid um
sniasbee up—tipi—bang! Sweep up Chi
naman.
In a central Missouri town recently a car
load of watermelons sold at 1 cent each.
That probably accounts for the negro's ten
dency to go west.
Mr. Butterworth, of Ohio, expresses bit
ter antipathy to the party caucus. Possibly
the Hon. Ben has found to his cost that
they come too high.
Factional quarrels in the party are said
to have prevented the registration of 30,000
voters in Baltimore. A “harmony meeting”
of the state committee is talked of.
“What is reciprocity V’ asks Mr. Reed.
Why, dear Mr. Speeker, it is a convenient
little arrangement by which you give $5
and got a vote, as you did recently. Under
stand !
That czarowitz must be a very reckless
young man. lie announces his purpose of
journeying around the world, while his im
perial dad does dare not venture arouud the
block.
Massachusetts republicans are now nomi
nating New Hampshire men to office. They
have four on their state ticket. But pos
sibly they only pat them there to see them
beaten.
Chicago fair commissioners have at last
got s ometbing done. They have arranged
their salaries. After they have had time
to see bow that works they may do some
thing else.
Republican newspapers seem to think the
Democratic party is suffering from a dearth
of available presidential material because
the whole party is not clamoring for the
nomination as the republicans are.
It is an interesting tussle between Blaine
and Reed to see who shall get the presiden
tial indorsement of the Pine Tree state.
Thus far the Plumed Knight is away ahead
and Tommy seems too fat to overtake him.
In Paris there is said to be a place whore
at various prices titles may be bought.
For $6,000 one may become a count.
Messrs. Porter and Reed should hurry over
and invest. It might aid them in their
business.
Three new cardinals are said to be
held in contemplation by the pope. One
each for America, Scotland and Ireland.
Archbishop Keurick is spoken of for the
American red hat. Archbishop Eyre for
Scotland and Archbishop Walsh for Ire
land.
Gov. Bob Taylor, of Tennessee, is said to
be an aspirant for U uited States senator.
He is stumping ior Buchanan “with that
end in view.” If his chances are no better
than some aspirants we know of he will
have to stump it at a pretty lively rate to
keep that end in view.
There is a wholes.ime lesson for mankind
in the recent mat imonial exjieriencos of
Daniel Perry, of Henderson, Ky. He ad
vertised fra wife in Chicago aud found
one immediately. But she had not been in
his home a week before she wheedled the
old man cut of S4OO aud vanished. Now he
is spending a fi w more of his hard-earned
dollars in getting a divorce. Marriage is
sufficiently tumultuous and uncertain at
best, without taking what the insurance
men call “extra hazardous risks.”
Last week a firm at Athens, 0., sold to
New York merchants 5,000 cases contain
ing 150,000 dozen eggs for $26,250. By tbe
time so many eggs can be accummulated
some of them are likely to be pretty stale.
Several theatrical freaks “open” in Gotham
about the middle of October. Still $36,350
is a good deal of money to invest in mere
amusement.
What Will Quay Do About It?
There is no doubt that a majority of the
I republicans of the House approve Repre
sentative Kennedy’s speech in which he at
tacked Senator Quay, the chairman of the
j national republican committee, and they
i would not have voted to keen it out of the
permanent edition of the Congressional
Record if it bad not also contained an at
tack upon the Senate. In order to show a
proper regard for the dignity of the
Senate they were compelled to do some
thing that would amount to a mild censure
of Kennedy. It is noticeable, however,
that leading republican members of the
House sought out Kennedy and expressed
their approval of his speech immediately
after they had voted to keep his speech out
of the permanent Record. And what did
the resolution of censure amount to'
Nothing at all. Even before the speech, in a
mutilated form, was printed in the Record
the newspapers in all parts of tho coun
try had published all those part* of it in
which the public was likely to be interested.
Asa matter of fact nobody cared particu
larly whether it was printed in the perma
nent edition of the Record or not.
But what course is Senator Quay going
to take with respect to the charges against
him which the speech contained. Is he
going to maintain silence and pursue the
even tenor of his way ? That appears to be
the only course open to bitn, unless he re
signs the chairmanship of the national re
publican committee. It is hardly probable
that be could show that the charges are
false, and he now knows that many of the
leading members of his pirty think
they are true. If there had been doubt
about their truth there would not have
beon so long a delay in deluding upon the
course to be pursued with respect to Repre
sentative Kennedy’s speech, and Kennedy
would not have been so generally congratu
lated by the republican representatives
after the course decided upon had been
taken.
The majority of the republican leaders in
congress virtually admit that the manager
of their party has a bad record. If they
permit him to remain at the head of their
party they will, by such a coursj, virtually
say to the world that a man’s moral charac
ter is a matter of no consequence to them,
and that what they want in a leader is not
integrity, but the ability to achieve success,
however objectionable his methods may be.
As the Republican party hasn’t a very
tender conscience nor a very savory record.
It is highly probable that Senator Quay
will continue to direct its affairs if he
wants to.
Tbe $32 Per Bale Proposition.
The Pittsburg Dispatch makes the state
ment that was telegraphed from Montgom
ery the other day, that an English syndi
cate had agreed to loan alliance farmers $32
a bale on 1,000,000 bales of cotton, the sub
ject of quite a leDgthy editorial, in the
course of which it says: “The announce
ment of the national farmers’ alliance
arrangements with a European syndicate to
advance $32 per bale ou cotton warehouse
receipts up to 1,000,000 bales proves what
the Dispatch has said about the alliance
sub-treasury scheme, that if agricultural
products can be warehoused so as to afford
good security, private capital will loun upon
them, and it is not the business of the gov
ernment to do so. In this case the security
of cotton warehoused and insured is un
questionable. With the millions of Euro
pean capital seeking investment, the
employment of a portion of it in aiding
producers to carry their crope is legitimate
and probable.”
Very little has been beard about this mil
lion bale scheme since the announcement of
it was first made, and ever since it was
made there have been grave doubts whether
the story had any foundation in fact. It is
probable that Englishmen would loan
money on cotton if they could be convinced
that the loan was a safe one and could get a
satisfactory rate of interest. But the
money would not be loaned on cotton stored
ou plantations, because no insurance could
be obtained on it there, and no warehouse
certificates as evidence of the existence of
the cotton. The cotton, before a loan
could be obtained upon it, would
bave to be put into warehouses and
insured. Where are the warehouses in
which 1,000.000 bales could be stored for
any considerable length of time? There are
warehouses at the ports and at interior
towns, but they are needed by their owners
for the accommodation of cotton that is
changing hands. Indeed it is doubtful if
all of them would hold 1,000,000 bales of
cotton.
It can be quite safely stated that the mil
lion bale scheme will not be carried out
this season. Its promoters will have to
wait for a more favorable season. Thoro is
no reuson why newspapers in Pittsburg,
however, should not Coutinue to diaou.s it.
Interesting tests of a now guns, made at
Sandy Hook recently, resulted very satis
factorily. Particular interest attached to
these tests, as the gun was the first of the
kind made by the regular army ordnance
department. It is of 32-caliber and weighs
twenty-nine tons. It has a Whitworth
tube and jacket (bought in England), but
the hoops and breech mechanism are of
American steel. Finishing and assembling
were done at Watervliot arsenal. Each of
the six shots fired gave good velocities and
low pressure. With a charge of 255 pounds of
German prismatic powder and a shot weigh
ing 571 pounds, a velocity of 1,954 feet per
second was obtained, the pressure being
37,375 pounds, only a few pounds greater
than that of the 8-inch gun with only half
the charge of powder. As this is an experi
mental gun it will be still further tested for
endurance, though the officials are well
satisfied that it will stand all requirements
of the service, and the department intends
to go ahead building guns of the same type.
Pictures of Chief Arthur of the engineers’
brotherhood show a man of placid and
strong features He is by long odds tho
ablest labor leader in America. And he is
not a demagogical agitatir, but a real
past master of actual work, who looks
wholly to the welf ire of his brethren and
not simply to his own aggrandizement and
newspaper notoriety, as the others do. In
him the engineers have a safe adviser.
Wyoming’s constitution is in disorder
and won’t work. It needs doctoring. Fail
ure of admission to the union as soon as ex
pected invalidates some of its provisions
and so annuls the state organization as to
prevept a general election in the presidential
year of 1892. States shouldn’t be made in
such a pell mell burry. They are intended
to wear some time.
Rev. Royall H. Pullman, of Baltimore,
says he only accepted the republican
nomination for congress in order to “put
harness on” his religion. Religion in harness
is apt to run away.
THE MORNING NEWS : FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 26, 1890.
The Earrundia Affair.
It begins to look as if Secretary Blaine
had been too basty in expressing the opinion
that Minister Miz .er was right iu Advising
the captain of the steamer Acapulco that
the Guatemalan authorities had a right to
arrest Gen. Earrundia on board hia vessel.
The promptness with which ihe resolution
of Representative McCreary, of Kentucky,
calling for all the information in the pos
session of the President relating to the
affair, was adopted by the House, shows that
congressmen are by no means satisfied with
tnai opinion. Thei eis a very general desire
that all the facts connected with the killing
of Gen. Barrundia shall be made public,
and that if a w rong was done or a mistake
made it shall be rectified as far as it is pos
sible to do so.
The fact that Gen. Barrundia was not a
criminal seems to have been lost sight of by
those who have held the opinion that as the
Acapulco was in Guatemalan waters the
Guatemalan authorities had a right to
board her and arrest any one
who was au offender against
the laws of Guatemala. He was not in
sympathy with th ee who are at the head
of the Guatemalan government, but it does
not appear that te bad committed any
offense against Guatemala. And he was
not on board of the Acapulco of his own free
will. The Mexicau government would not
permit him to remain in Mexico, and he
was forcibly put on biard of the
Acapulco by a body of Mexican
soldiers. He was bound to the port of a
neutral country. He could not help being
carried into a Guatemalan port. As oce
authority says, Mexico and the United
States extradited him without intending to
do so.
But it seems that there is no precedent
for the course which Minister Mizaer pur
sued. It was no part of his duty to advise
the captain of the Acapulco to surrender
one of his passengers.
Representative McCreary, in advocating
the passage of the resolution calling for in
formation, said that Minister Mizner’s ac
tion :s w.thout precedent. If he did go be
yond the strict Une of his duty, and
thereby brought about Gen. Barrundla’s
death, he showed himself unfit for the posi
tion be occupies and ought to be recalled.
Dr. McCune, the chief of the national alli
ance, is striking back at Gov. Gordon. Ho
published a card in the Constitution, yester
day in which be asserts that Gov. Gordon
thought so well of him that he wanted him
for a partner and director in a $7,000,000
Farmers’ Co-operative Cotton Oil and
Paper Sack Comnany, of which the gover
nor is president, and the stock of which the
governor was endeavoring to float last July.
From the card, it would seem that Dr.
McCune thought the company a good thing,
and agreed to become interested in it, but
withdrew from it when the governor in
formed him that each director would
be given $5,000, and possibly SIO,OOO, of
stock. It seems he did nbt want to be let in
on the ground floor. He appears to think
that the cause of the governor’s attacks
upon him are caused by his refusal to act as
a director of the con pany, and wants the
public to decide whether the g vernor is
justified in attacking him, in view of the
fact that he was anxious to have him as a
director in a big business enterprise. It is
protty safe to soy i hat the governor is not
attacking Dr. McCune because be refused
to be a director in the cotton oil and paper
company. Ha is not the sort of a man to
do an injustice to any one. The reasons for
his attacks upon Dr. McCune are doubtless
not connected with any busiuess matter be
tween them.
Commodore R. C. Hitt has just started on
a cruise from Bozeman, in Eastern Mon
tana, to the c mat of Florida in a curious
little steamer, recently built of mountain
Ur within the shadow of the mountain
where the timber grew, and launched at
Bozeman, near the source of the Missouri,
409 mile3 above the head of navigation.
She is 23 feet long, 5 feet beam, 30 inches
depth of hold. She is a screw propeller,
with marine engine and boiler of horse
power, and rides the water like a duck.
Cabin accommodations for three are pro
vided. Scientific experiment in shallow
river navigation is believed to be the object
of the voyage, though it is kept secret.
After a portage around the great falls of
the Mi-souri she will have clear sailing to
the Gulf. Whatever the purpose of the
queer little craft’s cruise, she will be watched
with deop interest by all who are interested
in navigation the oountry over.
Ten tableaux illustrating in pantomimo
the history of marriage in different countries
anti various ages ure to be the chief feature
of au entertainment given by the Massa
chusetts Woman’s Suffrage Association in
Boston next month. They are determined
to have marriage even though th’ey must go
through the ceremony in pantomime.
Doubtless the “various ages” will be repre
sented to the life.
Reduced to ashes Gustav Koch weighed
only five pounds, and Emilia Rossi, his iu
amorita, weighed only four. They are tho
romautic suicides of Gotham. By this time
they probably regret reducing their weight
so suddenly. Both of them together would
scarcely suffice to fertilize one grapevine.
Though tho anti-lottery law prohibits
newspapers from printing lottery adver
tisements under penalty of being excluded
from the mails, it is very doubtful if the
postoffice department or congress either has
any right to say what sort of advertising a
newspaper mayor may not print
There are said to be eight drachms in an
ounce. Basing an extempore calculation
upon the maxim that “a pint is a pound the
world over,” we have only to say they must
be very small drams, and that at least two
ounces would tie required to give satisfac
tion on a rainy day.
Emperor William recently conferred the
order of the crown upon a St. Louis man
who has hurried over to unload his thanks.
To hear him mangle the German language
with missionaries, will suitably punish the
emperor for his folly.
Our seaport cities are said to be protected
against bombardment by foroign warships
chiefly by the impossibility of any such
vessel carrying coal enough to bring her
within ranee. That is rather a doubtful
consolation.
Pastors say that daring their vacation
they find many suggestions for sermons, not
least of which, we presume, is tho ungodly
bill of the summer resort
Texas has accumulated $60,009,000 of
school funds. Texas could afford to indulge
in a school of journalism for a ysar or so.
Medical authorities say that “not one man
in a hundred uses all his lungs.” Thea for
heaven's sake don’t excite the rag man.
PERSONAL.
The Czar’s picked personal body-guard con
sists of fifteen native Corsicans.
Senator Wade Hampton, notwithstanding
his cork leg, is an expert horseman.
Dr. Talmage says that the report that be is
getting stout is an invention of Satan.
Anr iina Patti will sing fourteen times in
Russia and get 1,003 guineas for each time.
Mr. Cleveland had not .been in the Saranac
lake regions three days before be killed a deer.
The Empress or Acsxßt* Emotes from thirty
to forty Turkish and Russian cigarettes a day
Miss Winnie Davis will be the guest of the
city of Atlauta at the Piedmont exposition this
fall.
(’apt. N. D. Andrews of Toronto has rescued
during his lifetime slxty-mne people from
drowning.
John F. Allen of Virginia, the pioneer cigar
ette maker who recently died in his 75th year,
was born in Ireland.
Gen. W. T Sherman and Gen. Horace Porter
have been elected honorary members of the
Actors' Fund Association
Simeon E. Baldwin, president of the Ameri
can Bar Association, has been professor of con
stitutional law in Yale since 1872.
The Osman Digna, lost by the foundering of
the Turkish frigate, was not the hero of Plevna.
There was a similarity of names only.
It is said that Louis Jennings will be editor
of the London Morning P's', in plac * of Bir
William Hardman, who died on Sept. 13.
James Redpath, who waved the "bloody shirt"
for twenty years, is aiding Mrs. Jefferson Davis
in the preparation of the memoirs of her hus
band.
C. P. Huntington has given a fine tract of
lan 1 to the city of Newport News for school
purposes and intends to -T-Ct suitable buildiDgs
thereon.
Gen. S. E. Merwim of New Haven, republican
candidate for governor of Connecticut, is a
business man and president of the Yale Na
tional Bank.
31. Alphonse Daucet. the famous French
novelist, is now quite recovered from his recent
illness, and Is busily engaged on anew novel as
well as a play.
Rev. David Dudley Field and his wife,
parents of David Dudley, Stephen aDd Cyrus,
died at over 90 years of age. They had seven
sons altogether.
The Empress Frederick, to whom the En
glish tax-payers have contributed 840,000a year
for the Dast thirtv-flve years, has at present an
income of $350,000 a year.
BRIGHT BIT-a.
Ip we could know how little others care to hear
our tales;
If they could know how what they say upon our
hearing stales;
If sue i a state of circumstances we shall ever
see.
O, what, a very quiet place this noisy world will
be! —Chicago Post.
“Do you smoke?” the maiden asked sud
denly.
"Y—yes. sometimes," he stammered.
‘■Well, I wish you’d smoke now. These mos
quitos are eating me up.”—.Vein York Herald.
“Were any of your inclosures to the maga
zines accepted by the editor?" said one young
writer to another.
"Nothing, I believe, but the stamps that I In
closed for return postage.”— Washington Post.
"What:” Alone at dinner. Gertie?"
“Y s; while we were boarding George always
dined with me. but now that we’re housekeep
ing, and I do my own cooking, he is so busy at
the office he hardly ever has time to come to a
home meal Mall.”— Philadelphia Times.
"Say. Doubleup,” said Engleman looking up
from his paper, "here’s a meteorologist who
says the severest storms always begin about
uudt'iirht.”
’H-.'s right. That is about the time I fre
aueutly reach home and find my wife awake.”
—Morristown Herald.
Harry— Dearest. I love you better and
better every moment, and I long for the time
to coine when you shall be my own dear wife.
Dearest—o, well, Harry, there’s plenty of
time, and as you say your love’s increasing all
the time, it would be foolish to marry before it
became fully ripe.—Boston Transcript.
Jinks—Why, Blinks, what’s become of
your watch?
Blinks—Sat In the train next to a man who
asked me ten times in one hour if I had the
time.
Jinks—Well?
Blinks—Gave him the watch.— Jewelers Cir
cular.
Mrs. Wabash—And how does the breakfast
suit you, dear?
Mr. Wabash—O, it is perfect, except the
coffee. You don’t make as good coffee as my
first wife did, I must confess.
Mrs. Wabash—Never mind, dear; she’s going
to call on me to morrow and I will get her
recipe then.— lndianapolis Journal.
Sister Lizzie was to be married in a few
months and she was putting in the interval of
leisure preparing for the ceremony in the way
of dross by exp. ri men ting on her family in tne
cooking line. Little John was going to bed and
went through his usnal prayers up to the point
of saying, “Give us this day our daily bread,“
when some distressing memory struck him. and
he added, "But don’t let lizzie bake it.”—
American Hebrew.
School or Journalism.— Professor—l again
call your attention to the too common use of
trite expression. Mr. Quills, can you not liud a
fit substitute for the well-worn phrase: “He
died a natural death.”
Mr. Quills (about to graduate as managing
city editorial correspondent-in-chief)—Well, sir,
I suggest "he died without medical aid.” How
would that do?”
Professor—lt is excellent, Mr. Quills.—Har
per's Bazar.
“Johnny, add one to one, and how many have
you?”
“One.”
“Give an example.”
“When one man marries one woman.”
"Correct. Willie, take one from one, and how
many have you?”
"Two.”
“How’s that.”
"Take one man and divorca him from one
woman and you have two .''—New York Sun.
CURRENT COMMENT.
Good Ground for Gratitude.
From the Philadelphia Inquirer (Rep.).
The prospects are now that the President wifi
issue his Thauksgiving proclamation about the
time congress adjourns.
Less Policy and More Potatoes
W anted.
From the Troy Press (Dem.).
If England should now inaugurate measures
to assure the Irish people that t hey will be cared
for iu their coming contest with starvation it
would do more lo solve the Irish problem than
any repressive act or political arrests can pos
sibly do.
Ingalls’ Interest Constantly Increases.
From the Kansas City Times ( Dem .).
After serving three times six years in the
senate, the senior Kansas senator made a rate
of 18 per cant. in personal loans to impoverished
constituents. Should he be given a fourth elec
tion doubtless ho would feel it necessary to
charge 24,
They Wore Tight Some Themselves.
From the St. Louii Republic (.Dem.).
According to the Globe-Denuxrat twelve
senators and fifteen representatives cleared sl,-
000,(XX) by the vote which passed tne Wiudom
bullion swindle. It all came out of the treas
ury, but Wall street could l ave easily afforded
to pay a hundred million for a bill which, if it
remains in force f r ten years, will give Wall
street not less than a billion in money stolen
from the people by republican enactment.
Eaum’B Patent Refrigerator.
From the A'ev York Tribune (Rep ).
Mr. Raum may be, as some of his friends
round the convivial board in Ninth street are
said loudly to proclaim, a man of surpassing
genius, and yet it does seem to men who have
fallen into habits of observation that, Mr.
Kanin's “genius" is over.v rked; that he does
not supplement it by industry, as be ought to
do. For example, it is not quite the thing for
a man who calls at the (tension bureau in the
hours in wbic > p.rsous are received to he com
pelled to wait for nearly an hour while Gen.
Raum explains the advantages of a (latent re
frigerator Mr. Raum unhappily seems to be
lieve, since he accidentally emerged from a
starved claim agent’s office, that he is clothed
with absolute power; that he can protect men
who have overridden both the law and the evi
deuce, aDd punish innocent men in their be
half.
Van Hoctkn’s Cocoa—“Onoe tried,
always used."— Adv.
Opposed to Idleness.
A Brooklyn exchange tells a good story About
one of those self-appointed missionaries to re
deem artists from the indolent error of their
ways. It appears that he visited a u ell-known
lan scape y sinter awhile, ago—a brilliant young
man of high repute—end after chaffering over
tbe price of a picture or two. for he kuew wt at
he liked, and didn't propose to be beguiled into
paying a fancy prioe for a mere strip of colored
canvass, he suddenly blurted out, "Do you in
tend to do tbis all your life*’’
"Do wbat?" asked the artist.
"Paint,” was the response.
"I’m afraid I’m spoiled for anything else,"
said the artist.
“Oh, it may not be too late." urged tbe
missionary. "I should think when you get a
little older you would want to have a busi
ness.’’
Name Them After the Lord.
Old Fete Robinson, who lives at Worsham.
Va., is a pious negro, that jogged along with
his wife for many years, namug anew baby
every year until seventeen unbleached olive
branches bore scriptural mm s Tnen cams a
surprise, says the Ba.tim re Herald One
mo. ning the Rresbyter.au minister, while tak
ing his constitutional, met Pete.
"Good morning. Peter You seem to be very
much pleased at something."
"Yas. sah, I is. 3"ousee, de ole ’oman creased
de family las' night."
“Ab, indeed!"
‘ ‘Yas, sah. dar’s two mo' little lambs ov de
Lord.”
“Indeed! And what will you name them?"
"Gwine name 'em noth arter the Lord. Gwine
call ’em Messiah and Hallo way ”
"Messiah and Halloway? Where do you get
the Dame Halloway ?"
“Hi, man. Don’t de Lord’s pra’ r say Hallowy
be thy name. *
The Deadlv Railroad Joke.
Every railroad, says the Pittsburg Dispatch,
has its regulation jokes, so to speak. Jokes
that are racy of the rail. Some of them are
puns that travelers deli,ht to make upon the
names of stations. The jokes RO-called are ap
parently always in season. There is no "close"
time for them. For instance, it Is pretty safe
to say that a Fort Wayne train never stops at
Dixmont, but someone says fac -tiously to his
neighbor: "Ah! here's your station:" or asks
with tine irony: "Don’t you get out here?"
This particular joke—for it is a joke, of
course—is made with frightful frequency at
such seasons as this, which brings crowds of
country cousins to the Pittsburg exposition.
When the brakeman opens the door of the car
and yells more or less melodiously: “D gsmou’’
or "Xruont," or any other railroad equivalent
for Dixmont, you will see at least one on two
humorists playing the changes on this venerable
witticism. You may not laugh over the jest
now, but you must remember that it was new
and funny to you once upon a time.
A Day Dream.
Among the whalers who went out from New
England fifty years ago was one Capt. Day, says
Harper's Magazine, an estimable and devout
man—for a whaler. After a particularly pros
perous voyage they anchored one Sunday In a
little bay on the eastern coast, and the captain
proposed to his mate to go ashore and attend
service in the evening. As it happened the
captain fell asleep as the sermon liegan. and
soon a long-drawn sigh, resembling at times
a snort, sounded Irum his corner. Thu
minister, a young, strong-voiced man,
was bent upon impressing his hearers
with the genuineness of the mira
cles of the olden time. "Not in the shadow of
night, O, my brethren; not in the darkness; no:
But, brethren, in the light of day!” By a cres
cendo movement bis voice Increased in power
until the word "dsty" culminated in a shriet
and the worthy captain heard it in his dreams,
and thoughts of whales came to him.
"All hands up!” he snouted, jumping on the
seat; "man the boats!" and swinging his haud
around, he brought his index finger to bear di
rectly upon the astonished dominie, aononneing
in stentorian tales "There she blows.”
He Startsd a Graveyard..
Out in the Erie coal fields near Burlington.
Col., says the Detroit Free Brets, a few years
ago a lean freckled-facea follow, with high
Spanish heels on his boots, walked into the Stone
and Quartz saloon at Burlington, and loaning
bis long body on bis bony anus on the bar.
turned round to the dozen loiterers who were
in the place, and wita a orawi drew his lanteru
jaw down on his flannel shirt and said:
“How long has this yer camp been a run
nin’?"
“Two years.” replied the bartender without
raising bis eyes.
“Graveyard begun yit?”
“Notyit.”
“ 'Bout time the camp had one. S'po3e I
start one?"
One bony arm left the bar. It never reached
its owner's belt. There was a noise that
soundad like a man dropping a log chain in an
empty hardware store, and this noise was fol
lowed by a crash of exploding six shooters
from the loiterers. A curtain of white smoko
rolled up against the ceiling. The man at the
bar made a lurch and then fell upon the floor.
Six bullets were in his body.
A graveyard was started in Burlington next
morning. The lean man started it himself.
Burlington is now wiped out, but high up on
Bear Rib Butte is one grave. It is the only one
the camp left.
Bad Glasses.
“I don’t know that I ever heard of a clearer
case of theft,” said tne southern judge of the
peace when a negro had been arraigned before
him.
"I doan see how you make that out, sah,” the
negro answered.
“You don’t? I will explain You were pass
ing a grocery store and snatched a bunch of
bananas.”
“You'se wraung dar, sah I wuz gwine lauDg
by de sto’ an’ on er su ldent I fouu’ de ’nanas in
mer han' an’ shet flown on m an’ walked on er
way. Pusson's got er right ter shet down on
whuteber he fin’s in his han'.”
"Yes, but he has no right to reach over and
grab something that does not belong to him.
How do you ao-couut for the fact that the
bauanas were in your band?”
"Well, sah. it is cu’is. but it wuz all on er
'count o’ doze yere specktikles.”
“What have they to do with it?”
“I’ll tell you dat—tell you right now. Some
time er go I ’gunter lose my eyesight an’ I got
deze yere speoks caze er white man lowed da
would fetch things dost ter me. Da did sab
W'y. sah, ever’tning I'd look at would come
right up ter me. an' while I wuz etandin' iu
front o' dat sto’, I looked at dem ’nanas an’ de
specks da drawed de things right up ter me.
kaln't blame er pusson for whut his specks
does, kin you ? Ef you wants ter hoi’ de specks
'sponoerble, yere da is. You may break ’em ef
you wants ter, aldo da cost me money.”
“I think," said tbe judge, “that I should re
move you from danger. I don’t want to rob
you of your glasses, so. rather than dread that
you may draw some great trouble up close to
you, I will send you to jail awhile. Staying
in the dark awhile may improve your eyes to
such an extent that you may not need your
glasses."
No Discrimination Against Daya
Every one remembers the story of Rufus
Choate, says the New York Times, who, when
asked by the court to quota the precedent
which just fled bis making a certain assertion,
responded: ■ Cheerfully, your honor, though in
so doing I will have to deprive your honor of
the unique distinction of establishing that pre
cedent yourself."
Well, here is even a better yarn of a legal pre
cedent, which v as picked up by William Henry
Hnrloert wnile searching materials for his work
on “Ireland Under Coercion.”
Hurlbert was in Cork one Easter week during
the spring assizes and dropped into court on
Holy Thursday afternoon to see how the crown
officials disposed of agrarian cases in that dis
tressful country.
The court was about to adjourn for the day
and the trial of the prisoner in the dock, who
was charged with shooting his landlord, was
not yet over. Every possible cttance to delay
the pi ocecdings was be ng eagerly grasped by
the defense, and before the day's business was
half concluded the pris oner’s counsel was doing
all in his power to nave the court adjourn until
Saturday on account of next day oei ig Good
Friday.
"It is a holy day an' a solemn day, me lud”’
explained tbe lervid birrister. “ihere is no
record, me lud. ia the annals of criminal juris
prudence; no record whatever of a man’s being
tried for his life on such a sacred day. ”
“We must protest agains. any such delay, me
lud.” contested tbe counsel for the prosecution
“Tuere is absolutely no precedent to justify its
being granted.”
"I regret I cannot agree with our learned
brother for the prosecution." said the assize
judge. Old Laron Dowse; one of the cleverest
and wittiest men that ever sat on the Irisn
oeneb, mid ash spoke, the face of the counsel
for the defense visibly brigutened. “A prece
dent for such a delay does exist, but that prece
dent was established at a trial which this court
rot used to take cognizance of. As well as we
can remember, a ruling adjourning proceedings
out of respect to the Holy Day, now Known as
Good Friday, was made on a certain memorable
occasion in toe court presided over by Pontius
Pilate. But be it here understood tnat none of
the rulings made at that trial are recognized m
her majesty's high court of justice In Ireland,
and I tnerefore declare that proceedings in this
court will be retu ned to-morrow, Good Friday
morning, at 10:30 o’clock. r
ITEMS OP INTERBBT.
They have a lady in Grand Rapid*. Mich.,
who is as great a crank on black as the wife of
Senator Davis of 3linnesi<ta. AU her under
garments. as well as the sheets and drapery of
her bed, are black.
A woman living near Steubenville. 0.. tir
ing of tne a bus • she received from a drunken
husband, threw mortar in his eyas In the ab
sence of a whipping-post the mortar plan is
cheap and effective.
A Yankee has invented a chicken hobbler,
consisting of a spring attached to a hen’s lrg,
which, when the hen attempts to scratch, will
mo - e ner onward, and will, in fact, walk her
right out of the garden.
The balloon proposed for polar explorations
is 99 feet in diameter and 500,0 0 cubic feet
in volume. The Journey Is to be begun from
Spitzeubergen, and with a favorable wind is
expected te la-t four or five days.
A German watch that is on exhibition in a
Pittsburg window is probably the thinnest time
piece in the world. It is not more than an
eighth of an inch thick, and the works them
selves seem no thicker than cardboard.
There is now more beet than cane sugar con
sumed. In 1881 the total of the world's produc
tion of cane s igar was 2.006.5C0 tons, and of
beet sugar 1,.. 4.600 tons In 1890 tbe ro al of
cane was 2,246,000 tons, and of beet 8,360,000
tons.
A sea lion in the Zoological gardens at
Paris has distinguished himself by saving tbe
life of a little boy who tumbled into the water
and couldn't get out in consequence of the high
basin. Toe seal held him up until help was at
hand.
A farmer near Los Angeles. Cal., has forty
seven acres of corn, and is willing to wager
that 10,000 of the stalks are twantv-two feet
high, which is higher than a man on horseback
can r-aeb. He expects a crop of 150 bushels to
the acre.
Yachting is annually growing more and
more fashionable with French women. The
yachts of the Baroness Adolphe de Rothschild.
Princess Brancovan, Princess Gortscbakoff and
the Marquise de Loys Chandieu attracted great
attention in the defile that was one of the
features of the r cent regatta at Thonon.
Probably the most unique strike ou re cord is
that of the Bombay barbers against the shav
ing of widows’ heads They say the practice is
not enjoined in the Hindoo scriptures, and they
will not do anything contrary to scripture.
At least that is the purport of their
declarati n. Any barber who shaves a widow’s
head is fined and boycotted.
In th* province of Perm, in Russia, there
has just passed away a remarkable person,
Stefen Aberjew by name, in his 110th year. The
village priest, who has known the oid man for
the last thirty years, states that he had never
seen niin sober sin -e his eightieth birthday.
Toward the end of his life be drank over a
quart of corn brandy a day. He was never ill
in his life.
By far the most expensive cMlee brought to
this market comes from Blue Mountain,
Jamaica. Tbe whole product of the region is
small and only a few thousand nags reach New
York. It is usually bought by Deimooico at a
very high figure. At tne same time the Dei
nionico coffee does not contribute to the restau
rant’s reputation. Quite as good coffee is
served at half a dozen less ! a moils places.
A finger nail led to the discovery of a thief
who robbed a factory iu France. He entered
through a window, and the nail was in some
way torn off and left on the sill. The next day
an employe appeared with an injured! finger,
and suspic on, of course, pointed to him, but he
fled before he could be arrested. He was traced
to Paris, and, on the police fl ding him in apart
ments, h-jumped out of the window aud was
dashed to death on the bricks below.
A western correspondent says: “Riverside,
the banner orange-growing town in Southern
California, is psrhaps the richest town in the
country, if thi average wealtli be accurately
estimated. Of 5,000 persons, 966 are assessed
for mote than SI,OOO each, which represents
$12,000 of value. So one out of every twenty
persons in Riverside has more than $12,000 in
property. This is due to tho fact that three
quarters of the people in town own their pla
ces; and even if they have only five acres in or
anges, this small grove will support a family
well, as the average yield will be worth SIOO per
acre every year.”
A native journal states that the develop
ment of the system of postoffice savings banks
in Japan has been remarkable during the past
fourteen years. “They were established by
government in 1875, witn the object of encour
aging thrift and to collect the small sums scat
tered about in private keeping. At first they
attracted so little attention that at the end of
1875 there were only 2,000 depos tors, with $:5,-
320 lodged. Henceforth, however, the figures
increased at a remarkable rate. In 1876 the
deposits amounted to $11,84% in 1882 to $ 1.058,-
000, in 1885 to $9,050,000, and in 1889 to $20,451,-
000. In Tokio tbe number of depositors is 356,-
009 and the amount of their deposits $10,400.-
000."
A fireworks company near New York made
the fortunate discovery this week that an em
ploye was filling roman candles with both clay
and powder. The addition of the clay, it is
sail, makes the exploding of the candles dan
gerous, being liable to cause the bullets to come
out of the end field in the hand. The man has
been arrested, but denies that he has done as
charged. It appears that thousands of dollars’
worth of the candles have bean tampered with.
Some of them have been shipped to customers
in various parts of the United States, but they
have been requested to return them to the
factory. Officers of the company- are of the
opinion that he did not put the clay into the
candles of his own accord, but was prompted
to do so by some enemy of the concern.
“Fifteen months ago,” says a man who has
just been there, “there were not a dozen people
in Middlesbnrough. Ky. Now it has a popula
tion of 6.000. An E igiish syndicate worth $20,-
000.000 is building the town. They have spent
SBOO,OOO in straightening a creek which runs
throu rh it, aim have encircled it with a seven
teen-mile dummy line. They have put up elec
tric cars and electric lights aud have about
completed seven furnaces. Busin -ss buddings
costing less than SIO,OOO are not allowed to be
built—and lots are selling for as much as $460 a
front foot The bonds of the circular dummy
line have been gobbled up at 115. The syndicate
owns 100,000 acres in and around the place and
has already realized a million and a half dollars
on the investm-nt. Mr Arthur, the manager
for the syndicate, gets $35,000 a year for his
services, and last Christmas they made him a
present of $30,000. Mmd. I haven't told you
half what I know about this fifteen months' old
tOWD.
An American gentleman who was recently
at a dinner party in London had a rather
curious experience. There was also present an
extremely aristocratic but insular Briton, with
that large contemnt for things American that
even to-day a few Englishmen display Never
theless i.e designed to notice the Am rican
gentleman so far as to ask him a great number
of quesiions about the United States, some of
them very ludicrous. Finally the question of
geography came ud, and the Englishman in
quired as to the relative size of Texas, the
largest state. “Well,” replied the American
'it is about as large as England. Ireland Scot
land, Wales. Holland, Belgium. Den mars
Switzerland, Portugal and Greece combined "
It became at once evident that the questioner
not only disbelieved the statement, but was
indignant at what he regarded as an attempt
to chaff him. Indeed, after dinner he com
plained to the ho3t about tue ill breeding of the
American in trying to hold up to ridicule an
English gentleman.
The Cincinnati Tinute-Star recalls an old char
acter of Cincinnati Darned John O . For
eccentricity and a peculiar combination of ex
cellent and unlovely qualities it seems Scarcely
possible that a more unique example could be
found. He was well educated, intelligent ani
surewd, tender-beamed, profane, generous and
yet, in a crabbed way o his own, as clo-e as
couid be He acquired a large estate, and died
worth $150,0)0, yet he would always allow him
self to be sued for a note or debt before he would
pay it. His peculiar nature dedghted in the
zest of a lawsuit, and he liked the notoriety of
testifying on the wi ness stimd, “D— you ”
be wouldsa, to his antagonist, outside of the
court room, “I'll lieat vou on t at yet ” The
suit woull almost invariably go against him
and after the proper amount of grumbling and
srearing he would pa? it. On one occasion
John c use home witu a large basketful of fine
cbma. When he wanted anything he wanted
it wanted it right away, and plenty of it As
he drove into the barnyard tne Digs crowde t
around Urn and grunted furiously, thinking it
was corn. John furiously got mad, and, raising
t;.e basket high in the air. dashed it among the
squealing group, saying: “Eat it all
you.
FOR INEBRIETY
Use Hereford’s Add Phosphate,
Dr. John J. Caldwell, Baltimore, lid.,
says: “It has proven by experiment and
experience to be highly beneficial in ineb
riecy and mental trouble*.”— Ado.
AUTUMNAL advice.
Keep your feet warm and dry.
Wear waterproof boot* in preference to at*,
tics or rubber*.
Keep your eye on your umbrella, you will
need it yourself.
Stop a cough or a cold at once Pne imoc a
and consumption may be started by either.
If you wear rubbers take them off whenever
you have the chance, even if only fora few min
utes.
If you feel a cough or a cold coming on ts*
a drink of pure whiskey at once. It will keep
the blood in circulation and is the best prevent
ive against the diseases of the season.
Remember that only pure whiskey should be
taken. Duffy’s Pure Malt Whiskey has the
strongest recommendations from the leading
scientists and medical men in the country, and
is the only standard medicinal whiskey known.
Insist on having it.
_ MEDICAL.
CURE
Bick Headache and relieve all the troubles inci
dent to a bilious state of the system, such as
Dizziness, Nausea. Drowsiness.’ Distress after
eating. Pain in the Side. Ac While their most
remarkable success has been shown in curing
Headache, yet Carter's Little Liver Pills
are equally valuable in Constipation, curing
and preventing this annoying complaint, while
they also correct all disorders of the stomach,
stimulate the liver and regulate the bowels.
Even if they only cured
HEAP
Ache they would be almost priceless to those
who suffer from this distressing complaint:
but fortunately their goodness does not end
here, and those who once try them will find
these little pills valuable in so many ways that
they will not be willing to do without them,
But after all sick head
ACHfe
4* the bane of so many lives that here is whew
we make our great boast. Our pills cure it
while others do not.
Carter’s Little Liver Pills are very small
and very easy to take. One or two pill's make
A dose. They are strictly vegetable and do
■ot gripe or purge, but by their gentle action
pi ease all who use them. In vials at 25 cents;
five for sl. Sold everywhere, or sent by mo—
CASTES KSSIC2KE CO., Hew ?ofit.
MfiL Small loss. Small &
PERFECT a WELL. 5
Fillmore, Dußcqus Cos.. Ia„ Sept 1583,
Miss K. Finuigan writes : My mother and
sister used Pastor Koenig's Nerve Tonic for
neuralgia. They are both perfectly well now
and never tired praising tho Tonic.
SEVERAL CASES CURED
Pittsburg, Pa., May, 1889.
The well-known Rev. Pastor A J Z , who
will readily give his name ou request, writes
us: An orphan under my care suffered from
epilepsy for four years, which had advanced
very far, but three bottles of Pastor Koenig s
Nerve Tonic cured him entirely.
Another boy suffered from cramps to snch
a degree, that he became violent at times and
endangered his own life. Treatment lu several
hospitals by competent physicians gave only
temporary relief, but after using several
bottles ot Pastor Koenig's Nerve Tonic he
was cured entirely, and has bean, well and
healthy ever since.
Our Pamphlet for sufferers of nervonl
diseases will be sent free to any address,
and poor patients can also obtain this med
icine fre® of charge from us
This remedy has been prepared by the Be
verned Pastor Koenig, of Fort Wayne, Ind.,
for tho past ten years, aud is now prepared
under his direction by the
KO£KIG MEDICINE CO.,
60 W. Mad non, cor.Hinton Sit.. CFIU'AGO, ILL.
SOLD BY DKUCGISTS.
Price Si per Bottle. * Sottles for $5.
LIPPMAN BROS., Agents, Savannah. Oa.
LlNimenT
A Reliable Remedy
For PAIN of all kinds.
PI I DEC Rheumatism. Neuralgia, Hoarsen sa
UUIILu bore Throat and Croup. HEALS
Burns, Scalds, Cuts, etc. Mod Economics!
Medicine in the World. Should be in every
family.
LARGE BOTTLE FOR 33 CENTS.
All Druggists. NELSON <Sr CO.. Boswa
H HEADACHE
Harmless Headacns
THEY ARE A SPECIFIC,
Containing no opium
bromides or narcotics
They are not a c&thar
tic. Pric-\ 25 L ents.
For bv Prugeist*
its* Hoffman flf aCo. International lirli.—/-
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