The morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, May 23, 1891, Image 4

The morning news., May 23, 1891, Page 4, Image 4

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Newspaper Page Text4 CjjrlPoTmngftos Morning News Building Savannah, Ga. " SATURDAY, MAY 33, 1891. Repute red at the Postofflce in Savannah, Horning Saws ia published every day in the year, and is served to subscriber* in the city at 25 cent* a week, $1 00 a mouth, $5 00 tor six months and $lO CO for one year. The Mousing New*, by mail, one month. Si 00; three months, $2 20: six months, $5 00; one year, $lO 00. . . . The Mobnino News, by matt, six times a week (without Sunday issuei. three months, $2 00; aix motit's, $4 0J: one year. $8 **• The Morning News, Tri-Weekly, Mondays, ■Wednesdays and 4rt ays. or Tuesdays, Thurs days and Saturdays, three months, $1 25; six months, $2 60; one year. $5 00. The Sundat News, by mail , one year, *2 00. The Weekly News, by mail, one year, $1 25. Subscriptions payable in advance. Remit by postal order, check or registered letter. Cur rency sent by mail at risk of senders. Letters and telegram* should be addressed “Morning News," Savannah, Ga. Transient advertisements, other than special column, local or reading noticea. amuae menta and cheap or want column, 10 cents a line. Fourteen lines of agate type-equal to one inch space In depth -is the standard of measurement. Contract rates and discounts made known on application at business office cTir new vork office. Mb. J. J. Flynn, General Adyertising Agent of the Morning News, office 23 Park Row, New York. All advertising business outside of the state of Georgia, Florida and South Caro lina wil be managed by him. The Morning News is on file at the following places, where Advertising Rate* and other In formation regarding the paper can be obtained; NEW YORK CITY— J. H. Bates, 38 Park Row O. P. Rowell & Cos., 10 Spruce street. W. W. Sharp A Cos.. 21 Park Row. Frank Kiernan & Cos.. 152 Broadway. I>AL- HY & Cos.. 2? Park Place. J. W. Thonpson, 39 Park Row. American Newspaper Publishers'Association, Potter Building* PHILADELPHIA- „ It . a K. W. Ayer & Son. Times Building. BOSTON — 8. R. Niles, 258 Washington street. Fettengill & Cos., 10 State street. CaICAGO „ Lord & Thomas. 45 Randolph street. CINCINNATI— Edwin Alden Company, 66 West Fourth street. NEW HAVEN- „ The H. P Hubbard Company, 25 Elm street. ST. LOUIS — Kelson Chesman &Cos„ 1127 Pine street. ATLANTA— Morning News Bureau, 3>4 Whitehall street. MACON Daily Telegraph Office. 507 Mulberry street. INDEX TO NKOdWiSKMBNTI Special Notices—Facts About Land. C. H. Dorsett. Real Estate Dealer; Notice to Shippers of Freight. T. S. Moise, Superintendent Savan nah and Atlantic Division Central Railroad of Georgia; Special Notice, B. H. Levy & Bro.; Saturday’s Prices at Heidt’s; Boarding at White Bluff, A. Schmidt. Amusements First Presbyterian Sunday Bchool Picnic at Wilmington Island Friday, May 29. Sea Foam and Satin Gloss Soaps—Henry Bolomon £ Son. Railroad Schedule- Central Railroad of Georgia. Savannah Made Soap Savannah Soap Works. Bargains— Lindsay A Morgan. Potatoes, Onions, Etc.-A. H. Champion’s Son. Proposals—For a Suitable Site for the New Public Building at Savannah. Steamship Schedule—Ocean Steamship Com pany. Cheap Column Advertisements— Help Want - id; Employment Waited; For Rent; For Sale : Lost; Personal; Miscellaneous. Canada is clamoring for a substantial Im port duty on eggs. It should not be too heavy or it might smash the eggs. In that way Canada would fail in her duty. Chicago proposes to wrench some of the barnacles off the police force. That is a step toward improving its efficiency. Many other towns would do well to emulate that very worthy example. One of Blaine’s greatest tribulations is that too many people undertake to talk for him. Now it is a voluble son-in-law. But there is no telling when Russell Harrison may break out in a fresh place. American millers have gone all in a crowd to see their brethren in Liverpool. Should they manage to a-meli-orate the condition of the English miller he will probably be mighty glad to see them. Further complications are said to more deeply than ever involve the muddle over the office of governor of Nebraska. Noth ing short of anew election se9ms to be quite equal to completely straightening out the tangle. About the time the Florida lawmakers get along toward the 97Sd ballot probably Senator Call may get in again. At the present rate of procedure though fully that number of ballots will be required to satisfy all the prospective candidates who insist Bpon trying their luck. Quite a flock of aspiring young Farra guts are rapidly congregating at Annapolis to take the places of those who have just re tired to await the coming of excitement and glory. Possibly a large share of the ex pected excitement will consist in awaiting the dawn of that anticipated glory. Very likely Portugal would now be will ing to sell her claims against the Congo State at a pretty low rate. Considering the present condition of Portuguese finances it would be a regular wiudfall to the country if she could manage to unload some of her expensive and unprofitable foreign depend encies. Since stage robbing has grown compara tively dull the bandits have apparently taken to New York as a safer base of opera tions. Every few days we hear of some one who has been sandbagged or clubbed Mid plundered. But the number of arrests following such outrages is even smaller than out in the wilds of the woolly west. Newfoundland is still vigorously kicking against the proposed measures to coerce that country into abject su mission to the British foreign office. Should the House of Commons insist upon passing the proposed bill, Newfoundland may gather up her guns and proceed to bang away at the British Rag. Then it will only be a matter of time auitl Britannia loses another colony. Evangelist Ram Jenee says, among many stber idle and thoughtless remarks: “1 lik a man who can do bis business in tbe day time and stay at borne at night. If you ean't do that you ought to take to the woods.” This it the first intimation that as disliked himself because of the clerical aecessity for preschuig at night. Such an opinion, if it really amounted to anything at all, would bear down rather hard upon the ministers, who hevs to do nearly ail ol ihelr preaching at night—even on the Sab Wtn. But Ham Joust doesn't count. Not a Dumping Ground. It is fully time European countries were male to understand that this country is not a damping ground for the scum of their populations. There are more nndesirable immigrants comiog here now than at any previous time in our history. The regular lines of steamships from Europe are not able to accommodate them, and tramp steamer* are being hired to transport them. And the efforts made to prevent the unde sirable immigrants from landing are ex tremely feeble. The Secretary of the Treasury, under a law pas led by the last oougress, has ap pointed a commission to go to Europe and find out the means employed by the govern ment! in the different European countries to get the scum of their populations to emigrate. It is considered absolutely cer tain that moat of the people who are emi grating from certain countries which are sending ns large numbers of emigrants are prorated to do so by their respective gov ernments. It is even intimated that they are the recipients of government aid. If they are the commission that will visit Europe this summer will find it out. and the information will be laid before oongress for its action. The chairman of the commission is ex-Con gressman Grosvenor of Ohio. He is an able and an aggressive man, and the commission under his direction will make a report, in all probability, that will be worth something. Congress has been dealing with tins im migration question iu a hesitating aud un certain kind of way. It has seemed afraid to take any positive steps toward shutting our gates against immigrants who are not wanted aud who are harmful to us. We have so long pursued the policy of re ceiving all who come that it is difficult to change it. Publio opinion, how ever, has become so aroused by the coming of hordes of people who are assimilated with difficulty, and who are not only a bur den to society but a menace to our institu tions, that congress will be forced to take steps to sift immigrants and admit only those who are genuine homeseekers and who will contribute to the upbuilding of the country. The steamship compiniei are supposed to co-operate with the immigration authori ties In keeping out undesirable immigrants, but from all accounts they do not do so. They are so eager to make money that nearly all of them bring to this country anybody who can pay his passage or whose passage is paid. If they were forced to take back the undesirable part of their passengers they would be a little more care ful to obey the immigration lawrs. Asa matter of fact, we want only the very best of the immigrants, and we are in a position to pick and choose. If we accept the scum, it ts our own fault, and we will have to endure the evils with which it i? sure to atfiict us. A Troublesome Official. Commissioner Raum is giving the Presi dent a great deal of trouble. He ought to resign, but he will not, although he knows that his resignation would be acceptable to the President. He had a long talk with tue President on Wednesday, the purport of wbioh has not been made public. The commissioner talks too much. In that respect he is like his predecessor Tan ner. He has told some conflicting stories relative to the crooked transactions of his son. But his great mistake was in telling the President that there is a conspiracy in the interior department to get him out of office. Of course there is no conspiracy. Doubt less the Secretary of the Interior would like to get rid of him, but he is not the sort of a man to attempt to accomplish that object by underhand methods. The fact is Knutn owes his present unhappy predicament to himself and his son. If they had attended strictly to business and had had nothing to do with patent refrigerators, pension sharks and the office brokerage business they would be all right. They would have es caped scandals and would have saved the President a great deal of annoyance. If Raum doesn’t resign he will be investi gated by congress. The country Is not sat isfied with the management of the pension office and the President knows it isn’t. It is probable, therefore, that the rumor that the President Is looking for Raum’s suc cessor is correct. And it can be pretty safely stated that he will find him before long. The Outflow of Gold. Europe is getting a great deal of our gold. She has got more than #40,000,000 within the last few months. And still the outflow continues at the rate of several millions a week. Our flnauoiers say that the outflow will cease shortly. It is to be hoped that it will. It is having a paralyzing effect in this country. It is true that no financial disturbances have been produced, and it is probable that we could Rtaud the loss of a good many millions more without showing any symptoms of alarm, but, at tbe same time, the fact cannot be concealed that there is a lack of buoyant feeling iu the money centers and business circles of the country. Legitimate enterprises cannot be floated so easily in New York to-day as they could six months ago, and all kinds of securities —even those which are gilt-edged—have a downward tendency. If this condition of affairs is not due to ths outflow of gold, to what is it due? There is no other apparent reason for the unwillingness of capitalists to embark in new enterprises or for tbe hesitation of people have money to in vest to purchase first-class securities. Nor oan the decrease m tbe volume of business be explained on any other ground. The reasons given for the outflow of gold seem to be tbe correct ones, and doubtless they are, and it may be that the purpose for which Europe wants our gold is pretty nearly accomplished. It is certainly to be hoped that it is, for if tbe drain continues much longer tbe summer will be a dull one from a business standpoint. Naturally enough the Hon. Steve Elkins vigorously denies that he had any evil de signs upon the sleek and innocent li: tie seals that gracefully float along the shores of Bering sea. So far from it he claims to have no earthly connection whatever with the North Amenosn Commercial Company, which has a contract to monopolize the whole business of slaughtering the soft in nocents. Nothing cruel or crafty about Mr. Elkins. Possibly he is a philanthropist out of a job. At Fortress Monroe the dynamite torpedo boat Vesuvius has been testing her pneu matic guns. What was really lacking was an acive and tangible object oti which to test accuracy. What a pity ths vessel wuld not bava been around on tbe Pacific coaat so as to allow tbs tars to ten tlielr •kill on the retreating Chilean privateer, l'heu we wight have seen what she could really do. THE MORNING NEWS: SATURDAY, MAY 23, 1891. The Hostility to Phillips Brooke. It is by no means certain that the Prot estant Episcopal dioceses will confirm tne election of Dr. Brooks as bishop of Massa chusetts. The diocese of Newark has re fused to consent to his consecration, and so has the stauding committee of the diocese of lowa. The vote in the Chicago Episco pal synod will, it is supposed, be a tie, the clergy being against, and the laity for, con firmation. Indeed, tre opposition to him is cropping out on all sides, and it would not be at all surprising if bis confirmation should be defeated simply because be is not as much of a High Churchman as some of the High Church people think he ought to be. The charge is made against him that he is in sympathy with the views held by Dr. Heber Newton, of All Souls’ church. New York c.ty, who is charged with being a heretic, and who is to be required to answer the charge. Dr. Newton says that "the church is in a panic, that men are no longer controlled by reason, but are going blind.” It begins to look as if there were truth in this statement. It would seem to be a grave mistake to refuse to confirm the election of Dr. Brooks. He has never been charged with being a heretic. No exception has ever been taken to any of his pulpit utterances. And be is one of the most powerful pulpit orators of the world. His ability to state Clyistian truths so that the common people can un derstand and appreciate them is remark able. In that respect he has few equals and no superiors. His following is large and influential, and it will not desert him. A failure to confirm his election, therefore, simply because High Church clergymen object to him might result in incalculable damage to the church. If he is not a consistent Episcopalian it is strange that the fact was not discovered until he was elected bishop. He has cer tainly said nothing since he was elected that would indicate that he is not. It really looks as if the charge that he holds views opposed to those of the church were a trumped up one, and made for the purpose of defeating his confirmation. The heretic hunters are striking at shining marks, and in their zeal they do not seem to care how much damage they may do to their church. Eham Civil Service Reform. There is a good deal of sham in civil serv ice reform. Those whose duty it is to 6ee that the laws against violators of civil serv ice rules and regulations are properly enforced have not yet reached that point where they are willing to do their duty faithfully, fearlessly and conscieutiously. Quite a long time ago a man in Washing ton was arrested for violating that pro vis. ion of the civil service laws which prohib its the collection of money from govern ment employes for campaign purposes. During Mahone’s last campaign in Virginia this provision of the law was violated. A man who assessed aud collected campaign subscriptions from government clerks was arrested. He bas never been brought to trial, and, acoording to our dispatches yes terday, he was recently given his liberty to hunt for a bondsman. The prosecuting attorney, who is a repub lican, has as yet taken no steps to bring this man to trial, notwithstanding the fact that the evidence against him appears to be clear. And neither the President nor the Attorney General seems to care much whether the culprit i9 tried or not. Tbe civil service commissioners have done all they could to have the prosecuting attor ney do his duty, but they have met with no success. The prosecuting officer seems to think that if he shows zeal iu the matter he will lose bis place. The power behlna him, of coarse, is the cause of his indifference. It Is clear that neither the President nor the Attorney General wants the as cused man tried. They tbiDk, probably, that if the accused man were brought to trial and civil service re form upheld they would lose some political influence, which the President, who is seek ing a renominution, may need. A great reform is blocked, therefore, in the interest of the President’s ambition for a second term. What Italy wanted to know chiefly was whether Fava lived richly and well or whether he was given to frequenting those cheap restaurants with which Washington is literally peppered. That seems to bo going a trifle too far. Simply because a man represents a certain country in a for eign land his government hardly has a right to gaze down bis throat and decide on what meat he habitually feeds. In order to be a faithful representative of Italy Rudini seems to think that Fava should stick to straight macaroni with dyspeptic Roman condiments and wear genuine Neapolitan olive oil iu his hair. But that is going a trifle too far. In a freer land Fava should be at liberty to squander his salary m high priced hotels or gorge himself at the free lunch counters. Neither would materially interfere with his translation of an official dispat -h. All that should be particularly required of Fava is to studiously avoid the powerful and alluring American booze. Notwithstanding the alleged barbarity of Mayor Shakespeare and Messrs. Parker son aud Wickliffe lo the recent New Orleans renovating sociable all of the gentlemen appear to be taking quite prominent parts in such national gatherings as they may happen to attend. At the Kansas City commercial congress Mr. Wickliffe took quite a prominent part, and now Mayor Shakespeare is occupying a very conspicu ous position in the trans-Mississippi confer ence at Denver. This may teud to show that the apparently rash action of these gentlemen was not so much the result of impetuous partion as of the deliberate con viction t hat organized assassination had to be suppressed. Iu an ironical tone Italy is now tremu lously inquiring whether we expaot indem nity for the trouble those New Orleans citizens had in exterminating the Mafia assassins. Reilly it seems as if we ought to get something for it. Let it go this time. But Italy should bear in mind that the United States is not an institution for tbe execution of foreign criminals. If we have to kill off any more of the u for thl land of tbe Cmsars we shall feel obligod to charge expenses and exemplary damages to our national serenity. What California supposed to he a distinct shock of earthquake may have been only an enhusiastio thump delivered by Corbett upon tbe brunette proboscis of Fete Jack son. So long as California continues to en courage prize fighting she may expect au occasional sudden jolt. While Italy remains in trouble with tbs American Eagle I’ramlar Kudinl tenaciously clings to tbs arms of bis friend• of the triple alliance. Evidently he fears that Us way used them Lo bis business. PERSONAL. Hon W. L Wilson of West Virginia ia an nounced to speak in San Francisco. “Mark Twain," Mrs. Clemens, and the chil dren will sail for Europe in about tnree weeks, to be absent from America a couple of years. Rose Hawthorne say* that Emerson's memory became so weak at last that be used to go out looking for himself ia the streets of Concord. Dr. Lucia R. Thompson, of Greenville, N. C., a medical graduate, has sailed for Europe to continue her studies in the German, French and English hospitals. Horace White of the New York Evening Post, now on a tour abroad, left Berlin last week for Constantinople, in company with Director Schrader of the Deutsche bank. Mrs. Harriet Beecher Stowe will be 80 years old on June 14. She is in exoellent phy sical health, but the mind has ceased to do its bidding in any connected or continuous manner. Since Gov. Hovey of Indiana went into office, over two years ago, he has pardoned 124 Prisoners. The number of pardons during Gov. orter’s administration was 106, and during Gov. Grav’s, 168. Caron Farrar of London is named as a pos sible successor to Dr. Phillips Brooks of Boston, but Vestryman Blake of Trinity chureh does not think he would be acceptable to a majority of the congregation. Hamid Bet, director of the imperial museum in Constantinople, bas seat examples of paint ings by himself to the Berlin art exhibition. The (act is a notable one, owing to t.ne well inown disfavor in wh en Islauiism holds the art of painting. Hamid is thr first Turkish painter to become known to the western world. Dr. Karl Oesterley, who died recently in Hanover, was, in all probability, the oldest art professor in the world. Oesterley was born in 1805 in Goettingen, where he became a pro lessor of art in 1829. He retained his professor ship. with the directors.rip of the art g lilery, until 1861. Among his best works are" Witte kind's Conversion,” "The Daughter of Jephtha.” "Christ Blessing the Children" aud "Buerger's Leonora.” Lady Alexander Leveson-Gower, a beauti ful and gently-nurtured young woman, was so affected bv the death of her mother, the late Duchess of Sutherlan I, that she renounced the world of fashion, in w hich she was a society queen, and became a working nurse in a London hospital. But the work was too much for her, and the scrubbing and drudging to which ad nurses are subject undermined her health and brought on consumption, from which she recently died. BRIGHT BITS. “Where did yon get your dictatorial wsys, anyhow?" asked Henpeck. “From you, while I was your typewriter," re torted Mrs. H.— Puck. Little Mcoley—Do you admire handsome men, Miss Amy? Amy—lndeed I do. Mr Mugley. Little Mugley—O, thank you.— Harper's Bazar. “What are you studying?” “Metaphysics." “And what is that?" “I don’t know any better than you. I only study it for pleasure "—Fliegende Blatter. At the door of a Ridgway church on Sunday evening a young fellow asked a young girl, “May I see you home?" with as much com posure a< he could musterl The little lady quickly replied: “No, but you can watch me start," —Elk Democrat. W ith the under dog in the canine scrap ’Tis well to sympathize. But place your bets on the other pup— Therein discretion lies. —lndianapolis Journal. “Let’s see. Wbat has become of D. B. Hill —is be still in office?' asked the rescued cast away on bis return. “Oh, yes. He is now governor of New York, chief justice of Connecticut aud United State* senator, with a prospect of the presidency.— Life. O, for the gift to make old clothes wear That pristine lookP-tyoutu that onoe was there’. Just to ctomate them, snd with sweet surprise Behold them like a gay young Phoenix rise Immortal and rt splendent from their ashes. I'd then cut dead that fraud I name with dashes. Who, once my friend, doth now in beastly pride Walk, like the Levite, on the other side.— Puck. Johnnie—What do you suppose, Billy, they do at the lodge where father goes? Billy—Read, I guess, most of the time, Johnnie—What makes you think so? Billy—Because our copybook says that “read ing makes a full man," and pop generally comes home from the lodge with all he can hold. —Boston Cout ter. Gentleman (who has engaged aged colored hackman to drive him from the station to the hotel)—Say, uncle, what’s your name? Driver—My name, sah, is George Washington. Gentleman—George Washington; Why, that name seems familiar. Driver—Well, I should think it ought to. Here I been drivin’ to this station to’ 'bout twenty years, sah .—Brooklyn Life. A citizen of < 'ass avenue stood at his gate the other day and offered a hoy it) cents to rake the leaves off his lawn. The lad said he hadn't time, and the citizen was about to go for a rake aud take hold of the work himself, when a man came along with a big sack aud asked: "Would you object to iny carrying off these leaves?" “What for?" “To bed my- horse.” "H’m. Make good bedding?” "First-rate." "Then you can have them for a quarter. Leaves have advanced 60 per cent, this fall!" Detroit Free Press. CURRENT COMMENT. Violent Grab for Votes. From the Washington Post (Ind.). If the Cincinnati platform doesn't make a good catch of votes it will not be because It is lacking in length or breadth. Collection of Absent Cranks. From the Cincinnati Times-Star (Rep.). George Francis Train, E. Stone Wiggins and Rev. “Sun Do-Move” Jasper are not in Cincin nati this week. Their absence provokes com ment. They Got Together. From the -Yew York Tribune (Rep.). The discordant elements in the Cincinnati convention "got together" to such an extent yesterday that "the People’s party of the United States of America" was launched, a platform adopted and a national committee appointed. The platform demands the aboli tion of national banks, advocates tbe “sub treasury plau,’ favors free coinage of silver, a tax on incomes, the eleclion of President and vice president and senators by popular vote, etc On the tariff there is no clear utterance. The comparatively harmonious action of the convention at tbe last was a surprise to the delegates themselves. How soon the harmony will disappear time will show. The feeds of Dissension Sawn. From the New York Times (Ind.). The new party. constituted by the disgruntled politicians and the “cranks” and dreamers of half a dozen western states, an nounces in its platform the purpose of captur ing the convention already called for February 84 next, but, failing that, its central committee is directed to call a national convention "not later than June J, 1892, for the purpose of nomi nating candidates for President and Vice Presi dent.” This is an omen of division and not of UDion. The abler and more level headed leaders of the organizat.oos which joined in the call for tbe February convention will never submit to the control of the short-sighted and feather brained fanatios who ruled the Cincinnati con ference. The seeds of dissension and antagon ism in the ranks of the discontented have al ready been sown. Particularly a Tariff Protest. From the Philadelphia Times (Ind.). In other words, the convention at Cincinnati was really a protest against the McKinley bill and tbe policy of tbe Pillion congress, nnd it is the revolt of the western farmers fiom their old party allegiance that, more than their pr sent impracticable schemes, gives Impor tance to the iew party movement. It is linpos sible and uuueccssary to predict tbe Immediate effect of this organize! h D like the original greenback and other allied movements it it likely enough to tempt both of the two gr at parties Into bids 'or iu support or it msy be come no more than so much poliuesi nisi chan disc Bui as tar as it goes it ind cates that ths revolution which gave 'he uaw congress to the democrats has not yet spam IU force and ih* clement which It represents is s factor that mini be reckoned in tbe calculations for 1 AM. As you lika it Gray ami faded whiskers may ha changed to t.eir natural and evau color -brown or black by using Bucking naat’* Dye. Try U.—A.d. The Flag- Have Camel Forming one of a circle around the camp Are at tbs Tenderloin club a few nights ago, says the New York Press, was Gen. Dustan. the genial chairman of the committee of epicures. When tbe general’s turn came he related the following episode as haring occurred during tbe late ui pleasantness, which was apropos of tbe conversation, which bad turned on the conva lescence of Gen. Kosecrans, register of the treasury: “1 am delighted to hear,” said Gen. Dustan, “that Rosy, as he is affectionately called, is well again. 1 was with him in Tennessee dur ing the war. I never saw him fazed but once, and on that occasion he had great diffl -ulty in keeping a straight face, altho igh preparing f r a funeral. He had on his staff a military dude, who got there no ona knew how. He was one of those fe lows resplendent in uniform, who make their horses prance sideways on parade. He was certainly beautiful to look at, but he never opened his mouth without fatal results. Gen. Plummer had been killed, and the preparations for the funeral in proper military style were nearly complete. A flag was required to cover the caisson on which tae coffin rested, ana Rosrcraus dispatched his dudish aid to procure one. Returned witn the flag in bis hand, the resplendent creature caused his horse to prance up to the general, and, after saluting, he said: ‘General, the flag have came:' A broad grin appeared upon the faces of the rest of the staff, but Kosecraas, with admirable composure, ordered the dude to take the flag to tbe caisson, and. as that worthy pranced off in great magnificence, Sur geon Thrale stepped up to the general, and, sa luting with mock solemnity, remarked: ‘Gen eral. the flag have went!’ This was too much for Rosy, whose dignity vanished under the in fluencwof the hearty laughter that followed." To Raise Bananas. A little, dried-up specimen of rural verdancy was seen standing near the Alton gates st the Union depot, carefully holding two banana stalk3, says the Chicago -Veto*. There was a piece of newspaper neatlv wrapped about the lower eud of them, and they were tied together with many yards of cotton twine. He was notiesd by Officer Good man, who asked him what he was doiug with the banana stalks. “Them's bsnany plaDts,” he answered guile lessly. “I’m goin’ ter take ’em home an’ raise some bananiss.” "But they won’t grow,” commented the officer. “Oh, you'se can’t fool me, fer I knows better. Thet feller out there tol’ me they’d grow, an’ he knows, I guess, fer he raises ’em himself— he top me.’’ “Did he give them to you?” “Course not. I paid a dollar’n a half for ’em, in good coin, too.’’ “But you have been robbed. Those things won’t grow.” “You can't take me in, fer thet feller tol’ me folkses ud try to take 'em away turn me, but yer can't do it.” “How did you come to buy them?” “Well, I went ter this feller to buy some bananies an' he askt me’f I’s a farmer. I tol’ him yes, an' he askt me why I didn’t do’s he did an’ rai: e the fruit myself. I tol’ him I'd like ter but I couldn't get the seed. Then he sold me these for a doller’n a half, an’ I'll havi two ban any trees next year ’’ He hoarded the train with the stalks carefully carried in his arms. “AU-a-Right.” She was just a little clerk in a store, a novice at the work, says the Detroit /■ ree Press, but very willing to be taught, courteous and oblig ing to everybody, and with one phrase that seemed to fill all places and conditions. When she made one of those trifling mistakes which the new clerk always makes, and was repri manded for it by the general manager, she would listen carefully, and when he had finished would nod her head and answer pleasantly, “AH a right.” Not knowing our speech well she was chary of using It, and although she smiled on all her fellow -clerks she had little to say to them. They liked her and were at paiDS to tell her the rules of the houße, and she would listen and in the sweetest way imaginable utter a soft “tank you." For the crowds of shopping women who han dled her goods and kept her taking down bales and bales of them for their inspection, she had always tbe one happy phrase, even when they did not want the goods: “All a right.’’ Ohe day there was an accident. Going home at the noon hour the girls stepped under a scaffolding that came crashing down upon them. Only one va hurt. The ambulance was soon there and loving hands prepared to lift her tenderly into it, although all knew that her hurt was mortal. But she, brave little woman, looked with wile-open, far-seeing eyes into the blue noon sky. a id as her whitening lips moved, and a smile settled on her face, they heard the quaint old phrase, her last Words bn earth: “All-a right.” . Timidity Saved Him Three Tlmel. We point with pride, says the Albany Union, to Joseph Sehinan and Mrs. Joseph Sehman, who, until yesterday, was Miss Lizzie Nichols of Riverside, N. J. Joseph had persevered against an overmastering weakness, and Lizzie had trampled on a very human pride to an ex tent that wins our admiration. Joseph has loved Lizzie for many days, so the report runs, and was well beloved by Lizzie. He proposed in due time, was accepted, and the day for the wedding arrived, with it came pretty Lizzie to the altar. But Joseph failed to come. There were tears and righteous execrations, and many a pretty pout. The days passed, and with them came ex planations from Joseph. It was all his timidity. At the last moment, his heart failed him, and in that panic which bashfuluess will often precipitate he fled from the bliss which he longed for. Lizzie benignantly forgave him. The sun shone again, and anew day for the nuptials was set. It came, but again brought no Joseph. Another explanation was as successful as the first, and a third attempt to execute the frac tious contract was as futile as the other two. When the young man came for the fourth time to sue for the lady’s hand, full of humilia tion for his foolish terror, she made her con sent provisional on their immediate marriage. Before he had bad time to be stricken with his unfortunate malady he had been pronounced a husband by the nearest minister. We trust that all their hopes of happiness may be realized. Just Ona Mors Question. Senator Zeb Vance of North Carolina, while at the Palace hotel, San Francisco, with a party of friends, noticed a young man with a slight limp walk across the corridor and pause to glance at the register. The senator eyed him for a moment and, turning to a Call reporter, said: “You didn’t know that I limped for years, did you? Well, I was hit in the leg by a federal bullet that caused me no little incon venience. I got around pretty well; but while standing in Jackson, Mies.. I noticed a long haired countryman eyeing me pretty closly, aDd be finally approaohed me. ‘“Look here, my friend,’ he said. ’I don’t want to appear curious, but I would like to know if you’re really lame.’ ‘‘l replied that I w as. “ ’Well, you’ll excuse me, won’t you? I just kinder thought I’d ask, reckonin' you wouldn’t get riled about it. Wounded, I suppose, in the wary’ “ ‘Yes, I was wounded,’ I said abruptly. “ ‘You sec, I don't know, and I’d like to ask you another question,’ still eyeing me criti cally. ‘“Go ahead. What is it?’ " ‘l'd just like to know if you was shot run nin’ or eaught in a trap.’ "Everybody roared who heard it, and it cost me about $lO for tbe drinks.” Twenty-oae. From Brooklyn Life. They were engaged. She came to him With eyes that glowed as hot as hades, And said, with angry look and grim, “I'm told, sir, you have kissed two ladies'.” "Why, darling, how absurd your rage!” He, laughing, cried, “Twas but in fun; Together add both maidens' age, ‘T’would but amount to twenty-one,’ Her anger soon was iauged away; She only thought of ten and eleven. Her eves again shone bright as day, Refliciing there the lover's heaven. O rogue: Though what you said was true, She did not know the truths between, That one of them was only two, The other temptress- sweet nineteen. Duly Explained. They had moved in next floor to each other on Saturday. The two men happened (o meet In front Katunlay eveulng. says the New York World, and the first observed “if you should Lear a noise like tal king flown carpets in mv house to morrow pies e don't make aay mistake. It a til be the children trot ting around the bouse " "Orta.oiy. sir, certainly.” replied the other. “And if you should hear things moving and bumping aud smaehmg on uiy side don’t jump to tor isMiciuslou that ws are no respecters of the haboatb day. it sill be ms playing whb Ui* baby.’* litre yeur pel dogs er cats at to saws# Liter tie#Ulster slirs sick--44 will earn hire—yy ITEMS OF INTEREST. Tug bi.cs .jay liar who hails from Astoria, Cal., is about as picturesque aa any. He says that Andrew Young recently discovered that blue Jays were digging up potatoes, flying with them in their bills and dropping them into a hole In a hollow tree on his ranch for future use. The potatoes fell through to the ground, and Mr. Young immediately nad a large idea. He harvested the potatoes on hisown raucn and the blue-jays then turned their attention to the potato patches of his neighbors. This matter arranged, Mr. Young carried the potatoes away in a sack as fast as the birds dropped them into the tree, and in this way he harvested fifty bushels as a gift via the blue-jay express from bis neighbors. The snake 1 tsur wiU have to eat some Attic salt aDd brighten up bis faculties. Among the visitors to the Smithsonisn Insti tution on Monday were Dr. Gatling and Mr. Maxim, both of whom are celebrated as the in ventors of rapid firing and destructive ordnance. They were there about the same time, but not together. Mr. Watkins, who is curator of the department of transportation, bade farewell to Dr. Gatling, tbe famous American inventor, at the northeast door, and, turning a minute later, greeted Maxim, Dr. Gatling's great English rival. Mr. Watkins thought it an odd experi ence to meet the two men in the same place within a few minutes. Mr Maxim has been de voting hims.lf recently to experimenting in the field of aerial navigation, and went to the Smithsonian tosee Prof. I-angley. Mr. Maxim's experiments, conducted at his place in Eng land, as he described them to persons who con versed with him, have been exceedingly practi cal in character. They say that in his secret heart “Old Hutch” idolizes his thrifty and respected son Charles, although professing objections to his art and mission and social interests It was soon alter Charles was first established in busi ness iso goes the Chicago story) that Isaac came to his father and said, “Dad, I think you ought to do something for me, too.” The old man looked him over; “you’re rigot, Ike,” said he,.“and when 1 come back from tbe farm I’ll have thought it over and I'll tell you what I make up my mnd to do for you. Yon come down to the board of trade at such and such a time.” So Isaac presented himself to his par ent at the appoiuted time, and said he, “Well, father, have you made up your mind what you’re going to do for me?” “Yea Ike”, and there was a gleam in the eyes of the parent, “Yes. Ike: I'vemade up my mind to get you a Waterbury watch.” An English divine has prepared a startling table of the figures perusal of which will make one thankful that he is living in the latter part of the nineteenth century Instead of in the days immediately following the landing of the ark. He shows that if one of Noah's boys had lived to be 500 years old, having his first child at 30 and his last at 470, and allowing for but one addition to his family every three years, and supposing them all to live to tbe ripe old age of 450, he could gather around him at least 147 sous and daughters. With a reasonable degree of prolific bearing his grandchildren would number between 10,000 aud 1 ~000; the great and the great-great grandchildren taken with the others enumerated above would swell the figures to something like 50,000; this, too, if monogamy alone were practiced. If polygamy were the rule, as it probably was at that time, the figures would be still more startling. The 10-year old Crown Prince of Germany ap pears to be in a fair way of becoming an insuf ferable little prig. A few days ago, when returning with his brothers from a drive, the palace guards, as usual, turned out on the ap proach of the imperial children. As the carriage nad driven up rather rapidly, tbe men were forced to run as fast aa they could to assume their places In the ranks, and one unfortunate fellow, in his haste, forgot Ws gun. This was immediately noticed by the Crown Prince, who, as soon as ever the carriage had stopt ed, instead of entering tue palace, hurried off with his brothers to the officer in command of the guard for the purpose of lodging a c umplaint a.-ainst the soldier who had appeared without his rifle. The result was that the soldier was sentenced to four days’ arrest and to a further term of fatigue duty for his remissness, while the Berlin papers are filled with laudatory notices of the military feeling and precision of the future Em peror of Germany. A dentist in the New York Ledqer says: “To determine a person s character by the teeth take the upper front teeth. They are tbe true index of the nature of a man or a woman. Hero,” be said, “is the tooth of a young lady who has a lovely disposition and is universa ly beloved; see how regular and dainty the forma tion is, aud yet possessing all requisite points for a perfect tooth Here you see the tooth of a man who is cruel, although his cruelty is of the refined kind; notice that the tooth is white and rather sharp and long. Then this tooth, stumpy and coarse in form, denotes the brutal ity; it is from the jaw of a man of brutal na ture. Here is a curious tooth from the mouth of a peevish, fretful woman; the crown has a sharp, fretful turu to it. Now we have the tooth of a sensuous woman; you see it is square, although of good shape, and depressed in the center; its weirer has caused a great deal of distress in the hearts of neglected wives. Now we come to one that belong id once in the mouth of a lady who is noted for ner refinement and intellectual development It is slender and perfect in shape—one of the kind of teeth that go with long, slender fingers.” According to the Norwich Bulletin, Prof. Brewer of Yale recently told a good snake story. Years ago he was in California and had his tripod and other surveyor s instruments in the field. Stepping a’ong in the bushes he feit a movement under his feet and found he was standing on a four aud a half foot rattlesnake— a large,' vicious, and fighting fellow, hut the snake was so pinioned that he could not strike the thick boot that held him fast. Prof. Brewer held the ratt ler's head down with his tripod and cut it off. Then he cut off his rattles. Stepping aside he saw the body of the snake, partly coiled, lying very still. Taking out his rule to measure its length the professor took hold of the serpent to straighten him out. "Quick as an electric shock,” said Prof. Brewer, "that headless snake brought the bloody stump over and struck a hard blow upon the back of my hand.” He added: “I knew that his head was off and that he could not poison me, but' that quick and hard blow of the rattler made my hair stand on end.” Prof. Will ster, standing by, said: "T have on two or three occasions seen similar sudden blows by headless rattlesnakes ” At the home of a well-known Jewish citizen of St. Louis was recently seen a tiny flame burning in a handsome goblet. Examination showed the goblet to be half filled with water, on the top of which floated about an inch of pure olive oil A miniature Boat of corks, fastened on either side of a metallic ring, rested upon the oil On the ring was placed a wax taper, hardly thicker than a thread, pass ing through a small circle of thin wood, so that the lower end of the thread dipped through the ring into the olive oil. The upper end of the taper was lighted, as above mentioned. The on drawn up through the wax-covered taper served to krep it alight for several hours. "We burn this,” said the lady of the house, "in memory of one of our dead. When that taper burns nearly out we will substitute an other, so that the flame, like the vestal Are, never goes out. We light the taper when our relative dies and let it burn a year, the last one being allowed to burn out We attend to these lights with great care, thus keeping alive the memory of our loved one. It is an old custom of ours, and one seldom now observed. Some burn it only for a week, while others burn it for a month. Our family adheres to the cus tom in all its purity; always keeping the flame alive for a year.” The late Prof. Michael of the Berlin Academr of Arts was a man of unusually com manding presence aud manners. One after noon a banker's messenger went to his studio with a mortgag >on a house on which he had lent money. Tie professor expected a model at the same hour. The messenger had served in the army, so when he was led into the studio he stood still to wait orders. He saw the pro fessor’s classhsrd at work from a nude model and began to show symptoms of uneasiness. The professor heard him shifting about and shouted testily, “Take off your coat." The messenger hesitated, but his military training was too much for him, and he removed it. Five minutes passed. The proses-.or looked up. "Na-a! Go ahead.” he called out. "Takeoff your shoes and stockings." The mes senger looked for some way of e cape, but the professor had shifted his place so that he sat before the door, and there was no window near at Hand. So the man re luctantly bared his feet. He shivered on the tile flooring for ten minutes before the pro feasor looked up again. "What in the devil do you mean!" roared the Irate artist "Havel got to mention every garment before you will remove ft? < iff with your vest and trousers." With the swiftness or des|>air the ex soldier got out of these garment*. Micnuel sprang at him. shrieking, "Oo on* Go on!" lint the messenger had rescued his limit He made a dive for a piece of .tuluary. put it b tween him aud the professor, aud cried out pil oualy: "Uott in Lerumel, If tne H*rr Baker was only here!" Tiiese de-|lriug words relieved the situation In laspens* to a quasUou or two the messenger blub-<ered out hleerrand, the professor pijcketed the in >rtg(e ad oil i a gold pins Idr m u Bed the quatlng young man for um wear and tear of high art on ius nervous system No other preparation so meet* (ha wants of a debilitated system at Ayer’s hartt |rUU.-A<f. Da. & C. 'Vest’s Nerve and Brain Trf rent, a guaranteed specific for Hysteria. D> ness. Convulsions Fits, Nervous Neural, Headache. 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