Newspaper Page Text
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Morning News Building Savannah, Ga.
WEDNESDAY, JUNK 10, 1891.
Registered at the Postoffice in Savannah.
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‘ OVBSEW YORK OFFICE.
Mr. J. J. Fltxr, General Advertising Agent
of the Mornino News, offloe 23 Park Row,
w York. AH advertising business outside of
the state of Georgia, Florida and South Caro
lina wil be managed by him.
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INDEX TO NKW ADVERTISEMENTS.
Meetings—The Merchants and Mechanics’
Doan and Building Association.
Special Notices—Cut This Out; Savannah
Street and Rural Resort Railroad Company ;
The "Hill Patent" Blinds, J. C Kimball. At
lanta, Ga ; Outing Suits Cheap, Etc., C. F.
Law, Receiver; Savannah Rifle Association;
First-Class Restaurant; Fried & Hicks; Notice
of Dissolution, Pudgen & Crowley; Reliable
Drugs, Etc., at Heidt's.
Summer Resorts—Battery Park Hotel, Ashe
ville. N. C.
Knickerboceeb Rye—Henry Solomon & Son.
Excursion—First Annual Excursion of the
Savannah Total Abstinence Guards to Augusta,
Ga., Friday, July 3.
Aucttion Sales -Sundries, by J. J. Oppen
hsim.
Proporaia-Wanted for supplies for South
Atlantic Quarantine Station.
• Cheap Column advertisements— Help Want
ed; Employment Wanted; For Bant; For Sale;
Dost: Personal: Miscellaneous.
The publication of anew story by Miss
Adeline Sergeant, entitled "A False Posi
tion; The Story of a Mysterious Marriage,”
will be begun in the Mornino News next
Sunday, and in the Weekly News June
20. Miss Sergeant has written several
stories of great power, and they are very
popular. She is descended from an old
Lincolnshire (England) family, and was
bom at Ashbourne, Derbyshire. She began
to write when 8 years old, appeared in print
when 13, and published a volume of verse
when 16 years of age. Her first success was
with “Jacobi’s Wife,’’ which was accepted
while she was traveling in Egypt Subse
quently the story wns issued as a serial by
Messrs. TiUotson & Son, and Miss
Sergeant at once became a favor.
Ite with the readers of newspaper
fiction. Her forthcoming story will arouse
the warmest enthusiasm. It opens with a
mystery, develops by means of a love scene
into a deeply absorbing domestic story, is
lifted on a higher plane of interest by an
unexpected tragedy and the disappearance
of a leading personage, and continues its
Bourse through an infinite variety of scenes
and incidents, treated in a graphic style,
nnUI the mystery and romanoe surrounding
“A False Position” are thoroughly un
raveled, and the novel terminates delight
fully with the seaofid generation of char
acters. The reader will conclude with
zest the story he commenced with delight
and expectancy.
Farmer Ingalls denies that he has become
In anyway connected with the New York
Truth. Presumably he is still faithful to
the Kansas potato.
Wholesale bribery was said to have been
found necessary before the Barings could
gain a foothold in the Argentius Republic.
But it all went for literally naught.
According to a Kansas Olty dispatch
‘•Bill Arp” is accredited with the statement
that “Georgia is for Bill.” This is merely
another exemplification of the familiar say
ing of a “another good man gone wrong.”
If Georgia is so strongly for Hill it is a very
strange thing that the voters have not
found it out.
Onoe arrived at Bar Harbor Mr. Blaine
has apparently recovered his normal state
of health and got down to state department
work again. Unless Mr. Harrison shall take
occasion to chase “his Secretary of State”
to the Maine coast it is not likely that he
can extort that desired pledge from hitn
this season at least.
Arizona Apache ludians are again upon
the rampage and trying to have fun with
the ranchers. What the ranchers need
to do is to turn out in full force with Win
chesters and give the red demons all the fun
they can stand. No tribe of Indians on the
continent is half so treacherous and blood
thirsty as those Apaches.
Schweinfurth. the Illinois freak who has
been making a circus of himself at Kansas
City and getting his pious shins kicked, is
now engaged in threatening direful caiam
itieeto the irreverent Missouri town. Among
other things he threatens pestilence. No
pestilenoe be could send would probably be
so cordially disliked as himself.
Has He a Chance?
It is very positively asserted that Gov.
Pattison, of Pennsylvania, is a candidate
for the democratic presidential nomination.
And he thinks he has a chance to get it.
One of the rumors afloat is that Tammany
is in favor of him and has already told him
that it would do what it could to get the
New York delegation for him.
This is not the first time that it ha3 been
stated that Gov. Pattison was looking
toward the presidency. Soon after his
election last fall it was announced by bis
friends that his name would be presented to
the next national democratic convention
for the presidential nomination, and that in
the meantime a strong sentiment in his
favor would be worked up by his admirers.
The announcement, however, made but
very little impression. It was regarded
only as an outcropping of the enthusiasm of
some of the governor’s friends. He had
been elected governor a second time in a
strong republican state, and that fact indi
cated a popularity so remarkable that even
those who were not very frisndly to him
thought that he had a chance for getting
the nomination.
But it is far from certain that Tammany
han committed itself to him. That organ
ization is friendly to Gov. Hill of New
York, who, if be determines to be a preei*
dential candidate, will have Tammany’s
support. It is true that Gov. Hill has many
strong enemies iu the Tammany orgauiza
tion, but the number of them is not suffi
cient to prevent him from getting the Tam
many vote. And what Gov. Hill’s plans
are nobody yet knows. It has been stated
that he purposes to be a candidate for gov
ernor next fall with the hope that, if
elected, he will have no difficulty in getting
the solid support of the New York delega
tion in the national convention, but the
governor himself has not said that he pur
posed to seek a re-election to the governor
ship.
But those who are speculating about the
presidential prospects of Gov. Hill and Gov.
Pattison cannot afford to ignore Mr.
Cleveland. It is certain that he is just as
strong with the people as ever. The poli
ticians don’t like him. They never did, and
the politicians are now doing what they
can to prevent him from being nominated.
No less than six democratic senators have
expressed their hostility to him within the
last month. But what senators sav about a
presidential candidate does not amount to
a great deal They speak their own senti
ments as a rule, not those of the people, and,
as a matter of fact, Mr. Cleveland is not
popular with them. They remember that
when he was President he was altogether
too independent to please them. He did not
seek their advice and seldom yielded to
their demands in the matter of appoint
ments. The reason for their hostility to
him, therefore, is apparent.
But the politicians may prevent Mr.
Cleveland from getting the nomination,
and if they should it would not be sur
prising if Gov. Pattison should be regarded
as an available candidate, notwithstanding
the improbability of his carrying bis state.
His political methods are much like those of
Mr. Cleveland, and bis political battles have
been won by dependence upon the people
rather than the politicians. But the na
tional convention would hesitate about try
ing the experiment of nominating a man
having little or no prospect of carrying his
own state. If Gov. Pattison, therefore, has
a chance for the nomination it is a very
slight one.
The Sensational Trial Ended.
The jury in the baccarat scandal trial re
turned a verdict yesterday of “not guilty.”
That was tantamount to saying that Sir
William Gordon-Cumming was guilty of
cheating at cards.
It was announced a day or two ago that
he said he would oommit suicide if the
verdiot was not in his favor. He will
hardly do that, but he will feel very much
like doing it when he is forced to resigu
from his club and the army. While that
verdict stands he cannot hold up his head
among honorable meu.
And yet there was a great deal of sym
pathy manifested for him during the trial.
If a vote had been taken in the court room
when Sir Edward Clarke, the attorney gen
eral, finished his argument it is probable
that it would have been in his favor.
But the jury oould hardly have found
any other verdict. The evidence was
against Sir William. And the chief jus
tice’s charge was against him. A verdiot in
his favor would have amounted almost to a
charge that there was a conspiracy to ruin
him, and that the prince was a party to it.
But it does seem strange that the priuce
was so ready to take sides against Sir Will
iam, with whom be had been upon the most
intimate terms for more than twenty years.
Is there not something in the case that has
never yet been brought to the surface? It
looks so.
Tough stories frequently shake the tele
graph wires, but the toughest of the season
comes from Philadelphia this year. It
calmly recites the story of a Hibernian
criminal known to local fame as “Paralyzed
Jimmy” Magrath, who wished to escape
from prison so very much that after numer
ous prevous attempts to finish himself he
made a final effort to out loose from “this
mortal coil” by afreuzied attempt to swal
low his own breeohes. Knowing how deadly
they must be the prison people made great
haste to jerk them away from him. Had
he managed to swallow them that would
probably have been the last of “Paralyzed
Jimmy.” This practically exhausts all
scientific effort at suicide. Greasy breeches
end it.
Irrepressible Mr. Duval has broken forth
in a fresh scheme. This time he is not
naming that very numerous infant son of
his after the whole United States Senate.
It is now a much more humble little device
by whioh he has been making n collection
of second-hand shoes. Representing to the
wife of a Baltimore car conductor that her
husband had fractured his shoe and wanted
bis best pair sent Mr. Duval generally got
them. How be made them all flt him is a
mystery that had not been explained up to
the time wheu he was arrested. If Mr.
Duval would apply his think tank to some
better purpose he might really strike some*
thing useful and profitable.
Guatemala is growing irrepressibly res
tive under the domineering tyranny of
President Barrillas. Within a short time
the country will probably be in similar con
dition to that of Chile, if not even worse.
Despotism literally drives these countries to
revolt. But it does them no real good.
They get but little better government after
the conflict at arms than they had before.
Rumor has not dropped Parnell yet Ac
cording to the latest he is soon to wed Mrs.
O’Shea and retire to private life. That
1 would undoubtedly be a very proper course.
But it doesn’t sound probable.
THE MORNING NEWS: WEDNESDAY, JUNE.IO, 1891.
Quick Work in Bardsley’s Case.
Ex-City Treasurer of Philadelphia John
Bardsley will soon be in the penitentiary.
And there are very few outside of his im
mediate family who regret the fate that has
overtaken him. A couple of weeks or so
ago he was one of the most trusted and
highly respected meu of the Quaker city.
On Monday eighteen indictments were
found against him for embezzling public
money, and yesterday he plead guilty. He
seemed to think that his course was run, his
career ended, and that the best thing that
could happen to him was to be hidden from
the world as quickly as possible.
The full extent of Bardsley’s embezzlement
is not yet known. He robbed the city of
something like $500,000 and the state of per
haps $1,000,000. And he got no-good out of
the money he stole. He was anxious to be
rich, and as soon as he had a great sum of
money at his command he began to specu
late. And he speoulsted recklessly and
wildly and he made bad investments. He
became involved with the rotten Keystone
and Spring Garden banks in Philadelphia,
and the closing of their doors hastened the
disaster which overtook him.
Now that Bardsley’s case Is settled, the
Philadelphia criminal court should give ite
whole attention to the scoundrels who
wrecked the Keystone and Spring Garden
banks. The president of the Keystone
Bank has escaped to parte unknown, bat
there are others who had a hand in the
wrecking business. They should be shown
no mercy. They were indifferent to the
distress and suffering which their guilty
conduot caused thousands of people, and
there is no reason why they should be
treated leniently.
Post uaster General Wanamaker met the
charges against him in connection with the
Keystone Bank in a straightforward sort of
way. and left the impression that there was
no foundation for them. It is a source ot
satisfaction that ho was able to show that
his reputation was untarnished.
Embezzlers and bank wreckers are be
coming altogether too common. They are
far more to be feared than common thieves
or burglars. The right way to deal with
them is to get them into the penitentiary
as quickly as possible. There they cau do
nobody harm.
Peary’s Arctic Expedition.
Great interest is felt in the Greenland ex
ploring expedition of Lieut. R. E. Peary of
the United States navy, which left New York
Saturday in the steamer Kite. The Kite is
a very little steamer, but she is well fitted
for the work expected of her. The expedi
tion is made under the auspices of the Aca
demy of Science of Philadelphia. Perhaps
no better qualified man to command it
could have been found than Lieut. Peary.
He has bad a great deal of experience in the
Arctic regions and is accounted a very suc
cessful Arctio explorer.
One of the objects of the expedition is to
make a complete map of the unexplored
northern ooa9t of Greenland, but the chief
object is to determine whether Greedland is
an island or a continent. If it is found to
be a continent a great obstacle to the reach
ing of tb9 North Pole will have been re
moved. At least that is Lieut. Peary’s
view of it.
The steamer Kite will go no further than
Whale sound, where a house will be built
for Mrs. Peary, who accompanies the ex
pedition. From that point the explorers
will start on their journey on snow shoes.
The greatest precautions will be taken for
getting back. These precautions will include
the establishing of provision stations at
short distances. Nothing that foresight
can suggest to make the expedition a suc
cess will be left undone.
High Tariff Hum.
As the flowery month of June comes on
apace it attracts attention to oue of the
most peculiar absurdities of the recent
tariff bilL Objecting with all the
vehement patriotism of his rural Ohio
nature to the invasion of our domain of
sweet clover and rose buds by the pauper
bees of Europe, Mr. Tariff McKinley de.
oided to protect the rusty brown American
working bee. With one of those marvel
ous inspirations for whioh he is chiefly
noted he conceived the cunning notion of
shutting off the invasion of our deserts of
sweets by the foreign and more or
less pauperish queen bees of Europe.
Heretofore apiarists had been addicted to
the mean and despioable habit of inducing
immigration of these alien queens by
covertly suppressing their buzz and bringing
them through the custom house without
paying any prioe of admission. AH that is
to be stopped now. Whenever a man oomes
over who looks as if he had any leauings
toward honey-making he is to be searched
to ascertain if he has any valuable bees
concealed about his person. If he has they
are to be immediately yanked out from
their hiding place and taxed with their
shortcomings. They are also to be taxed
twenty per cent, ad valorem under that
clause which provides for duties on “other
animals not especially provided for.” Bees
are evidently regarded by the tariff as one
species of those neglected animals, which
shows that Mr. McKinley knows much more
about taxing things than he does about
natural history.
Notwithstanding all these formidable re
strictions there is no doubt that a few of
those industrious foreign queens will man
age to fly over the fence and get in among
our clover blossoms and also sip the nectar
of the magnolia and the lily when they
bloom. No doubt they will hurl a soft
murmur of defiance at Mr. McKinley and
his little bill, and when they are once safely
landed they will straightway proceed to
make things hum.
Manitoba rumsellers are positively violent
in their demonstrations against even the
clergy who venture to testify against them.
At Winnipeg a few days ago the treatmeat
they subjected a minister to was positively
outrageous. It was wholly without pro
vocation, except that he bad testified against
their illegal practices. Law must be in
rather a primitive condition in Manitoba to
afford witnesses no more protection.
Shouting “Joe” Cannon, whose great and
vociferous mouth caused his party associates
so much solicitude and alarm last year in
congress .now wants to be the republican
candidate for governor of Illinois next time.
If be is the candidate that’s about all he
will be. No man in Illinois could do more
for the democratic candidate for governor
of that state than “Joe” Cannon on the op
position ticket. Look at the way he was
laid out in his own strong district.
Manifestly there is very little soft and
feminine sentiment about Dr. Rachel Ten
ney, of Chicago, who calmly proceeded with
the autopsy upon her own daughter when
she recently died, and then deliberately
directed the process of cremation. Nerves
do not appear to greatly disturb the doctor.
PERSONAL.
Mrs. Lillie Devrreux Blake has been
elected president of the New York City Suf
frags League.
Cardinal Gibbons has returned to Baltimore
improved in health, although still weak from
his recent illness.
Frederick Douglass cannot observe his
birthday anniversary, because be does not know
precisely when he was born.
Bisnop Flasch of the Catholic diocese of
Milwaukee is Buffering from cancer of the
stomach, and bis recovery is doubtful.
The venerable portrait painter, G. P. A.
Healy. who now resides in Chicago, is still ply
ing the brush, though 88 years of ago.
Col. T. F. Oakes, who is at the head of the
Northern Pacific system, is 40 years old and be
gan bis railroad experience as a rod man.
Minnie Madders Fiske, having deserted the
drama, has gone in for literary work and is
writing a novel said to be partially autobio
graphical.
Maj. James a Coles of Springfield is men
tioned as a republican candidate for the govern
orship of Illinois. He has been a member of
the legislature and United States district at
torney.
Mr3. Geo rc.b W. Childs of Philadelphia has
returned from Europe, her tour being brought
to a speedy conclusion owing to the Impaired
ooodition of her health. She has suffered muon
from rheumatism.
There are millions of crickets in the Clover
creek country, Idaho. They cover a stretch of
country ten miles long by three miles wide, and
are traveling northward, and many more are
coming from the west.
The proprietors of a Maine hotel have
bought a tract of land which they will plant
with berries and fruit for the pleasure of fash
ionab e guests who like to spend part of their
time in agricultural pursuits.
Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Carnegie, Mr. and
Mrs. Waiter Damrosch, Mr. and Mrs. Philip Ar
mour, Mr. and Mrs John Wanamaker, Cornel
ius Vanderbilt and family and Mr. and Mrs.
Potter Palmer are all in England.
Emperor William has announced his accept
ance of the invitation extended to him by Lord
Mayor Savory to attend a luncheon given in his
honor at the Guild hall on the occasion of the
emperor’s coming visit to London.
A curiosity in the shape of a petition was
presented to Judge Miller in Denver by one
George Badger, asking tnat he be allowed to
change his name from that of George Badger to
’ Badger George." The petition was granted.
Mrs. Louise Burbank of Leominster, Mass.,
is almost 104 years old. In her early years she
walked from Quebec to Boston, carrying her
babe upon her bacK. the fami.y finances com
pelling them to mike the journ-y in that way.
Mrs. Logan has sold her interest in the Gen.
Logan farm of 300 acres, adjoining Mur
physboro. 111., for $25,000 to T. M, Logan and J.
C. Clark. The tract is to be opened for building
purposes, as the young city is spreading rap-
M. Carnot travels free on the railways during
bis presidential tour in France, but when it is
concluded hissecretary figures up what it would
have cost if paid for at regular rates, and this
sum is handed over to be distributed among the
poorest paid of the railway men.
Hon. O. H. Wallop is to be the manager and
treasurer of Tattersall’s, Chicago. He is a
younger son of Lord Portsmouth, is about 30
years of age, and :s said to lie a good judge of a
horse. Trotting is very fashionable around
Chicago, and good horses are dear In the pork
city.
BRIGHT BITS.
Shi—You were in his class, were you* I hear
he passed his examination with great honor.
Was it oral or written?
He—Well, to be exact, it was copied—Mun
sey's Weekly
First Dressmaker—Have you had many suc
cesses this season ?
Second Dressmaker (proudly)—O, dear. yes.
Oue of my dresses caused a runaway accident.
—Boston Post.
She (after a moment of painful silence—re
plying to proposal)—Will you take me as I am?
He (questioned too abruptly)—Really. I would
prefer you when you have your diamonds on.
Munsey's Weekly.
Bhk— l feel very uncomfortable.
He—That’s because yoa eat too fast.
She—Oh, my dear!
He—Why, I just saw you eating at the rate of
forty miles an Dour.— Life's Calendar.
Makgent Flux (been a bad day for him)—
Hullo, Dobson, how do?
Morgenroth—But lam not Dobson. What
for you call me dat?
Flux—O, because I hate Dobson.—Puck.
Mrs. H.—We met so many titled people
abroad, bishop. One German nobleman was
very attentive to Maud. He was baron of—of
—What was he baron of. my dear?
Maud—ldeas, mamma, like most young no
blemen.—Life.
Frank—What has become of your poodle?
May—O, poor, poor Flossie, I hated to give
her up; but—but—
Frank—But what?
May—Bluefern didn’t have a shade that
would match her.—Puck.
Father—Young Walker has been devoted to
you for two or three years, hasn't he?”
“Yes, papa.”
Father—lsn't he very slow about proposing?
Daughter—Yes, George is a slow; but I think
he'B sure.--. Veto Fork Ledger.
St. Petf.r— Well, who is it?
Page—it’s Jones and family of Now York
city.
St. Peter Ah, yes; I’va heard of him. But,
why do you keep them waiting outside?
Page—Mr. Jones wants to know if you take
children.— Life's Calendar.
“Din Mr. I primer come yesterday?" asked the
high school girl of her friend.
“No, Mildred; ne didn’t show up," replied
Amv.
“j’bere you are using reprehensible slang
again. Why didn’t you say ‘display at an ele
vation,’ instead of ‘show up?’”—Pittsburg
Chronicle.
Mr. Saphead (to himself)— Here's a good
thing. I'll read it azain. bo 1 can remember it.
Let me see. Where is it? Ab, here it is. "Gen.
Butler says he has often been called a rascal,
but he thanks heaven no one ever called him a
fool." First-rate. I'll get t at off at the De
Beautees' to-night.
Mr Saphead (at dinner at the De Beautees’)
—Aw, Miss De Beautee, do you know I’m jike
Gen. Butler in one thing?
Miss De Beautee—Yea, I’ve noticed you squint
a little. — Good News.
It was at the boarding-house breakfast table.
After a moment’s cogitation. Brown looked up
and said: "Ah, Mrs. Sikes, you have one fish for
breakfast?”
"Yes."
Another pause, and again Brown spake:
“Ah, Mrs. Sikes, how many boarders have you
now?”
“Fifteen.”
“Cra-m-m!”
“Pd like to know why you are saying ‘Urn
m m,’ Mister Brown?”
“O, nothing! Only how appropriate your
motto is these on the wall: 'Deal Gently with
the Erring!’ ’’ —SmithrGray Monthly.
CURRENT COMMENT.
Hardly Half eo "Honest.”
From the Chicago Mail (/ndk).
Since the “Honest Dick” Tate and the “Honest
John” Bardsley episodes the republican press
has dropped the “Honest" prefix from the
Postmaster General.
Merely One of the Mob.
From the Philadelphia Press (Rep.).
The Albany Times refers to ex-Sonator In
galls as a "prominent republican.” Perhaps
our esteemed contemporary is under the im
pression that Gen. Butler is a prominent demo
crat.
Blaine la Still Operative.
From the Chicago News (IHd.).
Persons who are awaitiDg the information
that Secretary Blaine's constitution and by
laws are annulled and no longer in force will
he pleased to learn that the secretary is valid
in effect, and likely to be so for some lime to
come.
Eo Cincinnati Haa Ball On Sunday.
From the Cincinnati Enouirer iDem.).
Judge Gregg doesn't believe the Sunday base
ball players can be convicted and says public
sentiment is in favor of Sunday base ball play
ing. The prosecuting attorney says they can’t
convict, and he has enough of Sunday base ball
cases.
HOR9FORD*S ACID PHOSPHATE.
11l Effects of Tobacco
relieved by its use.—Ad.
He Cooled Els Temper.
In a western newspaper office ten or a dozen
years ago were two reporters, says the Detroit
Free Press, one a wiry, little, hot-tempered
cuss, the other a great big, lumbering, good
natured fellow whom the boys bad a lot of fun
with, participated in also by the hot-tempered
chap. One day after some monkey business
about the office Wiry resumed his labors and
w-as soon, as was bis wont, engrossed iu his
work, and that was not the time to disturb him.
But the big fellow tossed a paper bull at him
and it fell on his desk.
“Don’t do that!" he exclaimed angrily.
The big fellow did it again with a chuckle.
“I tell you not to do that,” stammered Wiry,
getting white with rage.
The big fellow laughed and threw another.
In an instant Wiry had caught up a tnvo
pound paper-weight from his desk, and, blind
with anger, hurled it at the other man's head.
It whizzed by him near enough to raise the
hair, pnd almost buried itself in the plas
tered wall at nis back. The narrow escape of
his intended victim seemed to cool Wiry, and
he sat down at his desk and took up his pencil.
The big fellow hadn't said a word, but the good
nature had ail gone out of his face. In about
ten minutes he got up, an i, going to the wash
room. came back gently with a three-gallon
woodan bucket fitted witn water. Very genti v
he slipped up behind Wiry and poured it all
over him.
Wiry was on his feet in a second, wilder than
ever, and dripping from head to heel.
”3it down,’* said the big fellow, quite good
natured again. "3it down, you little fool. You
needed oookog off, and that water'll do it just
right.”
Wiry had got bis ayes cleared by this time
and made a break for his man.
“Sit down, I tell you,” said the big fellow.
giviDg him a whirl. “X couldn’t kill you with
that water if I’d tried, but you would have
killed ms with that paper-weight, and if vou
make another move I'll choke the breath out of
your body and call it self-defense. See -’’
Wiry accepted the situation and the next day
apologized.
The Laugh Was on the Wit.
Romieu, the famous Farisian wit, was one
day caught in a shower, sajs London Tit-Bits,
and forced to seeek refuge ip a doorway of the
opera house. It was 6 o'clock already, and he
had an engagement at the Cafe de Paris for
that very hour. The rain fell in torrents.
There was no carriage to be had. He had no
umbrella. What was to be done?
While he was lamenting his bad luck, a
gentleman with alar f e umbrella passed by
Romieu was seized with a sudden inspiration.
He rushed out and grasped the stranger by the
arm. and gravely installed himself under the
protecting umbrella.
“I am overjoyed to see you,’’ he Immediately
began. "I have been looking for you for two
weeks. I wanted to tell you about Clemen
tine.’’
Without giving the stranger time to express
his surprise, Remieu rattled away with gossip
and anecdote until he had led the unknown
companion to the door of the Cafe de Paris.
Then he glanced at him with a face of well
feigned astonishment.
“Pardon, monsieur,” he cried; “It seems I am
mistaken."
“I believe so.” said the stranger.
“Good gracious!" added Romieu. "Be dis
creet; don't repeat what I have told you.”
“I promise you.”
“A thousand pardons!”
Romieu hastened within the cafe, and, amid
great laughter, told the adventure to his friends.
Suddenly one of them said:
“Your cravat is rumpled."
Romieu put his hand to his neck and turned
pale. His pin—a valuable sapphire—was gone.
On further examination his purse and watch
were found to lie gone. The man with the um
brella was a pickpocket.
Why Jones Bolted.
One of the best story-tellers it has been my
good fortune to meet is Lionel Brough, the
English comedian, says the New York Telegram.
He will tell stories and yarns by the day, the
supply being seemingly inexnaustible. His
hearty laugh and jolly face strongly emphasize
bis stories. One of his’ regulars’’is the tale
about the triplets.
It was at a well-known bar. Jones and three
friends were liquidating, when a messenger
rushed in and, taking Jones by the hand, ex
claimed:
"My congratulations. Your wife has pre
sented you with a bouncing boy.
"Let's drink to the health of the little
stranger!" shouted the delighted Jones.
They drank. Half an hour later the messenger
returned, but with less exuberance than on nis
previous appearance.
“Well?" exclaimed the anxious Jones.
“It's another boy!”
"Let’s drink to the twins’” shouted Jones, a
sickly smile illuminating nis features. Again
they imbibed. Another thirty minutes, and for
the third time the messenger made his appear
ance, hut he knew enough to stiok only his
head into the door and exclaim:
“It’s a girl!”
An ashy pallor overspreading Jone's face he
gasped:
“Boys, no drinks this time. "It's getting too
serious." And he bolted.
Dr. Holmes Tt lls a Strange Story.
Dr. Holmes told me the other day a curious
experience of his, writes a Boston corrospond
entoftheNew Orleans Times-Democrat. At
dinner one night he was suddenly moved, apro
pos of nothing, to relate a very curious crimi
nal case that ne had not thought of. so far as
he knew, tor forty years. When they left the
dining room and passed into the library it was
found the mafl had been delivered wnile they
were at dinner, and lay on the table. Dr.
Holmes opened a pajier sent him by a friend in
England, and behold! it contained the same
story of the long-past crime that he had just
been relating, revived in the newspaper, and a
friend in England, thinking it would interest
him, from its curious character, had seut it to
him.
"Now, what,” said Dr. Holmes, “put the
story at that moment in my mind? I suppose
the Spirituaitists would say that a spirit read
what was in the paper lying in another room
and communicated it to me Or was it, possi
bly, my unconscious self that saw it and com
municated it to the brain?”
“Which do you think it was. Dr. Holmes?” I
asked, curious to hear nis keen and subtle an
alysis of so strange an occurrenoe.
"I have no theories,” he replied; “I only state
facts.”
Song of the Flannel Shirt. t
J. P. B. in the New York World.
Sweet sovereign summer, whose warm heart
Beats with an ardent love for all.
Of all the bards whose lyric art
Has sung thy rosy coronal.
Thy golden harvest, wine new-pressed
And summer girls—who sometimes flirt—
There’s none who celebrates thy best
And coolest joy. the flannel shirt!
The seal and bear, no doubt, began
The custom, which with every year
Widens its hold on toiling man
And to the dullest makes it clear
That wbat in winter keeps us warm.
Preserves us from the dog days’ hurt.
Hail, blessing of the melting form—
Unwilting, welcome flannel shirt!
Thy lovers grow in numbers still.
And soon czars, sultans, kaisers, aye,
And even Quay and Innalls, will
Agree to raise thy glories high!
Though men of sold repelling mien
May scorn thee, yet at Mount Desert,
Richfield and Newport, thou art seen,
Kmoulh, soft, seductive flannel shirt!
Man’s Superiority to Woman.
From the Detroit Free Press.
"There, I’ve come away and forgot my
gloves.” said Mia. Buxom to her husband, as
they started to make some oails the other
evening. "You were in such a hurry that I
don’t suppose Pm more than half dressed."
“That’s just like a woman,” said Buxom,
“always something left behind. Now you sec
a man has an orderly and uisciplined mind, and
always does one thing at a time and doesn’t get
left. But Til go book and get your gloves.
Great Scott! I have left my door keys in my
other pocket, and the girl has gone out. ”
“No, you took ’em out and left ’em on the
bureau by my gloves,” said Mrs. Buxom, "I
remember seeing them.”
“Good graaious, woman, you are enough to
drive one wild. Why didn't you tell me? You
might have known I laid them there so as to be
sure to put ’em into my other pocket. Of course,
I did, that’s the only way to do a thing; have
some system about you; but, of course, a
woman would never guess what I Lid them
down there for.”
Mart’s intended (to her little brother, whom
he meets for the first time)—l see you have
your sister’s hair.
Little Brother—Ob, no, sir; she has mine.
When mamma had my long curls cut off last
summer sister Mary had them made into a
switch, and she has been wearing them ever
since.”— Brooklyn Life.
Now that the Rev. T. DeWitt Talmage has
said that “the Bible is all right,” we may
breathe again, in which respect we "have a de
cided advantage over these generations and
generations of our forefathers who lived by the
book and died before they could know what the
Kev. T. DeWitt Talmage's opinion of it might
be.—Detroit Free Press.
ITEMS OF INTEREST.
A host curious clocx is displayed in the
| window of a tobacco store in Philadelphia. The
frame is made from cigar boxes fitted together.
The round dial is marked by a coating of smok
ing tobacco. Two clay pipes of different
lengths s-rve for the hands, and the figures are
made of cigarettes.
Dr. W. C. Arons, a traveling specialist from
Columbus, 0., was bound over to common pleas
court in Paneroy, 0., on the charge of obtain
ing money under false pretense from J. W.
Smith, a patient. The sum involved is $25
charged and collected for the removal of an al
leged cancer, claimed by the profession here to
be acommon wart of twenty-five years stand
ing. Arons gave bond.
There is an unpretentious shopkeeper in New
York whose business is mending umbrellas and
canes, and be has a sign outside which has
brought many a smile from those who pass by
the place. The sign reads "Umbrella Hos
pital " The words suggest to you at once that
you have some "sick" umbrellas at home
w hich might be made quite respectable by a
little "doctoring.” So you take them to the
“hospital," you save the price of anew um
brella, and the shopkeeper grows prosperous.
A man who is the father of eight boys finds
that they cost him a suit of clothes, from hat to
shoes, once a week. Children oost money, and
most parents find it is only a question of how
much they can or will spend on them. But there
is in New York a mother who has upset the
rule. She has a little boy with an angelic face,
and she keeps him before the camera half the
time posing as a cupid, at a Fauntleroy, or as a
choir boy. The sale of his photographs net her
SSOO a year, and the worst of it is she does not
need the money.
The Chinese government is strictly opposed
to obscene literature. A law was recently pro
mulgated to the following effect: "All govern
ment officials who allow immoral books to be
published within their respective jurisdictions
shall be discharged. Every private person pub
lishing such a book shall receive 100 blows and
be banished from his place of residence to a
distance of 3,000 lees. The seller of an obscene
book shall get 100 blows. Within twenty days
from the issue of this law all the obscene books
of the empire shall be destroyed, beginning with
those*now in print.”
Miss Ellen Terry tried a curious experi
ment when Charles Reade’s play, “Nancy Old
field,” was produced lately in London, at the
Lyceum Tneater. She was unfamiliar with her
part—a delinquency for which insufficiency of
rehearsals is offered as an excuse, though it is a
rather weak one for an experienced actress—
and therefore she had it written out on small
bits of paper, which were disposed on sofas,
chairs, tables, or wherever the business of the
moment took her. The critics declared that she
did not know her lines any too well, but Miss
Terry carried through the dangerous trick too
cleverly to lead them to suspect the truth.
For years past the children in the neighbor
hood of 517 Twelfth street, Washington, north
west, found a good friend in the person of Charles
P. Boimstaick, who died recently. Mr Holm
starck was a general favorite with the children,
the Washington Post says, and was never hap
pier than when he had some of them in his room,
where he would have them talk to his parrots.
The children and parrots furnished him a great
deal of amusement, and when he was confined
to his bed more thau a week ago the parrots
would call out, "Poor papa.” and day and night
would keep up the cry. Neither of the three
parrots has spoken a word since Mr. Bolm
starck’s death.
Alfonso XIIL, Spain's small king, has an idea
or two of his own as to the privileges of woman
kind. A few Sundays ago. at one of the weekly
dances at which he is the host, a pretty girl of
11 years won his little Spanish heart, and he
showed his susceptibility by choosing her re
peatedly for a partner. At the end of the dance
the children, as usual, began embracing and
kissing each other good-by. Alfonso made
straight for his diminutive favorite with open
arms. She shrank away coquettishly and re
fused even to let him kiss her cheek. Alfonso
looked her over, turned his back, and walked
away When the bail closed, how ever, she went
to him and turned tier cheek to be kissed Al
fonso took a step backward, stretched out his
hand that she might kiss it, and said: ”1 am
your king.”
A prick may be less heroic than a blow, says
the Century, but it is apt to be more effectual.
One hornet will rout a squadron of soldiers; and
a realy-wittnd seaman once vanquished a
horde of savages with taok nails. Iu 1819 the
whale ship Syren, while on a vovage to the
Pacific ocean, met with an adventure which
would have proved fatal to alt hands but for a
quick stratagem of the mate. One fine day. off
one of the Pelew islands, all the boats neing
after whales and but a few men left
aboad the vessel, a large band of armed
natives suddenly swarmed over the
bulwarks. The crew flew to the rigging
leaving the naked, howling savages in fun
command of the ship. The mate, on coming
alongside, took in the t dilution at a glance ana
quickly ordered the men to open the arm chests
and scatter on deck all the tacks they could
find. Iti a moment it fairly rained tacss upon
the naked savages. The eck was soon covered
with these little nails. They pierced the feet of
the islanders, who danced about with pain,
which increased with every step they took,
until, with yells of rage and agony, they tum
bled headlong into tbb sea and swam ashore.
Never read in a poor or dim light or with the
light shining into the eye. The light should
come from behind or the side and thoroughly
illuminate the object looked at It is a bad
habit to read tying down or with the head bent
over an object. This is the most common
causa of n tarsightedness. When the eyes be
gin to pain from use, if rest does not give relief,
seek t iie ad vice of an oculist. Avoid reading
in railway trains and omnibuses. It requires
too great exertion of the accommodative
power to keep the eyes accurately
focused and fixed on the letters. Do
not read much during convalescence
aud illness. Take plenty of seep. Sleep is a
sovereign balm for weak sight. Bright gas
light, in crowded rooms, and the imparity of
air in such plaoes are especially to be avoided
Foreign bodies, if not wuehed out by increased
flow of tears, should be removed by an oculist.
F.yestones are useless, and smart neighbors
worse than useless where hard particles are
embedded in the transparent surface of the
eye. If lime or other destructive alkalis get in
the eye, wasii the eye thoroughly with a weak
solution of vinegar and water, followed by pure
vaseline or sweet oil.
The will of Joseph Linton Waters of Salem,
who died April 14, has been probated. In the
distribution of his oarthjy possessions the will
provides that the famous umbrella which shel
tered bun from the rain and heat for forty-four
years shall be given to his cousin, William C,
Waters. The will says "I give to my cousin,
Witliam C- Waters, my venerable umbrella (now
in perfect order), with carved handle, bearing a
silver plate—purchased of the late Stephen
Osborne iu 1*47. I hope the said umbrella
may be always kept in good condition.”
J, Linton Waters was the friend of Haw
thorne, the celebrated romancer, and figured
in the "Scarlet Letter.” He was a very
methodical man, and of peculiar character
istics. His suit was invariably black, re
lieved by an immaculate white vest and a
stiff collar that rose to majestic hight. He
was aconspicuous figure on the streets, being
of medium hight and substantial term, while
his soldierly step and sedate dress made him
the obs-rved of all, especially when he oasrlefl
his famous umbrella. He was a a man at noble
traits and filled many positions of honor aud
.trust, including a position in the Sa nm custom
house, and for many years as registrar of the
Illonois Central railroad.
We can bear our from personal observation,
aays the London Lancst, many of the state
ments which are now going the round of the
Siiblic press In reference to the habit of ether
miking in same parte of Ulster; for. in fact,
some of the paragraphs ore nothing more than
copies of what have boon repSrted In yawn
gone by The praotioe eame Mto ties about the
year IH4I-'42. and ws at first a Kind of reaction
agoinst the great temperance movement which
had been inaugurated by Father Matthew.
Ether, at that time of the ethyHc type, prob
ably not very pure, was substituted for whisky;
and the habit, commencing in or near to Drapers
town and spreading over a small surrounthug
area, is continued up to the present day. The
order of drinking, as witnessed during
a visit to the district named, is singular. The
ether purchased at open shops and at stores
was doled out in wineglasses. The drinker first
washed out his mouth with a draught of cold
water, and after that tossed off a wineglassful
of ether “nate,” as it was said, drinking it
quickly, almost at a gulp. Both men and
women took part in this indulgence, and were
speedily brought into a state of intoxication
more or less complete. The intoxication differs
from that produced by alcohol, it is more
rapidly mdueed and more rapidly dispelled: in
fact, the effect of one dose may be developed
and cleared off in fifteen or twenty minutes.
The delirium is sharp; the stupor, for a period,
deep: and the excitement, so long as it lasts,
hysterical. Of late years the use of the cheaper
methylated ether has taken the place, to a con
siderable extent, of the ethylic variety, and
tome think with more injurious effects; but on
this point there is no evidence strictly trust
worthy.
When you go to buy Hood’s Sarsaparilla
be sure to get it. Don’t be put off with an
inferior substitute. Insist upon Hood’s.—
Ad.
medical.
IF
You have eaten anything hard of digestion,
or feel heavy after meals, or sleepless at nigh,,
if you are a miserable sufferer from Constina
tion. Dyspepsia and Biliousness, seek re’ief
onoe in S. L. R. It does not require continu'd
dosing, and it will cure you permanently.
If you wake up in the morning with a bitter
bad taste in your mouth, take S. L P., i t
rects the bilious stomach, sweetens the breath
and cleanses the furred tongue. * 3
If your liver is out of order, then your whole
system is deranged. The blood is impure- tha
breath offensive, you have neadache feel’ l a
guid. dispirited and nervous. To prevent
more serious condition, 8
Take Simmons Lifer Regulator.
Price sl. Sold by all Druggists. Prepared h.
J. H. Zeilin & Cos., Philadelphia, Pa. 7
CURE
3ick Headache and relieve all the troubles tori,
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oating, Pain in the Side, Ac. While their most
remarkable success has been shown in curing
SICK
Headache, yet Carter’s Little Livir Pilu
are equally valuable fn Constipation, curing
and preventing this annoying complaint, while
they also correct all disorder* of the stomach,
stimulate the liver and regulate the bowei
Even if they only cured
HEAD
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who suffer from this distressing complaint;
but fortunately thetr goodness does not end
here, and those who once try them will find
these little pills valuable in so many ways that
they will not be willing to do without them.
But after all sick head
ACHE
as the bane of so many lives that here is when
we make our great boast. Our pills cure tt
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Carter’s Little Livbr Pills are verr small
and very easy to take. One or two pills make
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M Fill fc fed Jei
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