Newspaper Page Text
PART TWO.
THE WOES OF A RICH MAN
'HE MERCHANT fkince not one
TO BE ENVIED.
le Couldn’t Rest While He Lived
Nor After He Died—Hilton and the
Heirs—W. D. Howell's Return—The
fellow Garter—aoswell P. Flower.
(Copi/righf.)
hew York, June 80.—A few days ago,
inome mysterious way never sufficiently
eslaiued, a rude oil painting about eight
imes by twelve in siz9 was conveyed to
Dective Fuller’s office. Near the middle
of le oanvas a space had been left blank
antin the middle of it was written, ‘‘A. T.
Steart’s body is buried here..”
Irjuiry developed the faot that the spot
repisented in the painting was in Cypress
Hiftemetery, and men were set to work at
oncdigging for the dead merchant’s miss
ing kdy. Of course, they didn’t find it,
butte hoax was a nine dayß’ wonder and
the nwßjapers published columns about it.
1 at reminded of all this and of the pleas
ant dys I then spent lying on my back on
a graty tank in tbecometery watching the
men <% aid idly waiting for something to
totunupworth writing about, by recent
eventsthoviog how the curse has followed
that din’i millions. Judge Hilton, who
has somhow gained possession of the most
of their hai recently given $500,000 to the
UarderCitJ cathedral to quiet his con
scieuceiorm say, aud is bringing against
some of th* other heirs one of those in
termingle ictious which will never end till
the day if judgment.
Even i his life the merohant prince was
scarcely! bppy man. One of my most
vivid resilections is of the story told by a
friend i the wholesale business who had
occasiomneday to call upon Mr. Stewart
in his pivat* office. My friend was young
and impfcsianable. “Ah, how happy that
man mu' be!” be thought as be saw the
splendor if the establishment and noted
with whs awe the employes spoke their
master’s nme, “What would not I do to be
as rich as a is ?’
After seie iittle delay he was ushered
into a roonwi-.h a big desk piled with pas
pers. and si-tng behind it a withered, pale
and tremums man, prematurely old,
crushed by le weight of affairs. He was
scolding oueof bis clerks in a querulous
tone about tome trifling majter whiob
seemed any ting but trifling to the clerk at
the moment. By and by his breakfast was
brought in in a tray—it was about 10
o’clock—andwith ravenous haste he de
voured a fewnorsels.
Almost imtsdiately he was taken with a
violent fit of itching and—well, have you
ever been seaplt? Then no matter.
“Take it any! Take it away I" whispered
Mr. Stewart veakly, when the paroxysm
was over, walng back the tray with his
thin band.
“My God!” aid my friend afterward in
telling me oi ttie incident, “I wouldn’t
change places dth that man for twice his
wealth.”
A NEW V3TORY FOR TAMMANY.
New Yorken are having great fun just
now at the expose of ex-President Howell
of the Brooklyibrldge. That structure has
always been massed, or mismanaged, by a
board of trustee, half from New York and
half from Broohyn. A Brooklyn man has
always been prudent. At the last meeting
the New York tin came over in a body,
three Brooklyn iustees were absent, and a
New York man, Col. Wagstaff, was chosen
president. Mr. lowell was fairly dazed.
He accepted the <Hee of vice president, but
next morning rfused to surrender the
presidency to Wggtaff. And great has
been the fight ov<t it.
The president of I ,he bridge can be very
Useful to bis frieriT The quarrel is merely
Tammany against IcLaughlin and is only
an incident of a jealousy. It
helps to complete the political ruin of
Mayor Chapin of Bboklyn, for he was not
ou band at the meting to vote for the
Brooklyn man. One before McLaughlin
had to go to Mayor! Chaplin’s office and
order him to go to Hwell’s support. This
time both were caugb napping, so suddenly
did Mayor Grant sprilg ins little plot upon
them.
In Brooklyn there is no disposition to
grieve with Mr. Howej, as the mismanage
ment of tho bridge, fir which he is mainly
responsible, has been a scandalous. Little
instances illustrate thilas well as big ones.
>V lien the floor of the lew York approach
was laid, the engineer h charge permitted
it to slope toward the mffdle. When it rains
a big puddle collects, ihiis has never been
changed, but a lot of grOlings were made to
be thrown down in wot leather. The over
crowding of tbe railroads an acknou lodged
danger to life and linibnt rush hours, but
for about four years abstjutely nothing has
been done to remedy it. h summer most of
tho trustees go to Eurotp and there is no
quorum. Truly, Americans are a patient
people.
I’orhaps things will g( bettor under the
Tammany rule, and pelhaps they wont.
They oau’t go worse.
THE WAR OF IYPES.
I suppose I ought to apologize for men
t oning newspapir mattei so ofton, but
really they are the most interesting devel
opments in New York at present. The light
is bitter and remorseless. Joseph Pulitzer,
called by cable from a cruiseon his yacht in
the Mediterranean, has come flying home
like an old lion ready for the tray. Col.
< ockerill, who gets great credit for making
the World, put on his hat one afternoon,
incited thereto, it is said, by a cablegram
ordering him back to 3t. Louis, went over
to the Astor house rotunda, and in three
hours raised the capital to baok his new
venture. Some state the amount at $8,000,-
000, and say that pai t of it will be used to
put up the finest newspaper office in the
country. Col. Cockerill had not intended
to begin operations until fall, but a chance
to buy the Continent and Advertiser and
merge them under the latter title was too
tempting to miss.
Mr. Turner, the former business manager
of the World, is also out and has taken hold
of the Recorder, putting in not only money,
of which there was plenty before, but a
rare executive ability, which was quite as
muoh needed. Col. Tavlor of the Boston
Globe, one of the brainiest men in the bus
iness, is also said to have an interest under
the new deal with Mr. Turner and Mr.
Luke. If so, colonels will be thick on Park
How. Meanwhile good newspaper men fa
miliar with New York conditions are mak
ing lots of money.
There is really no reason why all the pres
ent papers shouldn’t do well. The number
" °t exc?ssive, and the newspaper reading
habit is becoming constantly more fixed.
As for myself, I don’t believe it’s a good
plan to read newspapers too much.
Po brief—cut it down—no “long-winded
stories"—that’s the recipe for the journalism
of the future, and the man who tries it first
Will make money.
the yellow garter.
Numbers of yellow garters with golden
ciasps, which are supposed to iniure the
maiden wearer a speedy marriage, and
jeweled garters of other colors, presumably
for those who don’t want to get married, aro
displayed in jewelers’ windows nowadays.
How any modest young man could dispose
of em or any modest young woman could
The monring News.
ask to buy them of a clerk of the other sex
is more than I can—but, there, it is none of
my business.
The jewelers are making enamel flowers
of almost every kind that grows—convolvu
lus, pansies, poppies, clover leaves. Always
a diamond dewdrop must lie at the heart.
Many a young man wishes, when he is se
lecting a present for his best girl, that the
dewfall had not been quite so heavy ou the
particular flower she liked.
Checkerboard sleeve-buttons are tbe ugli
est of recent devices for displaying one’s
wealth, these are nearly an Inch square
and divided up iu genuine checkerboard
style, the black squares in jet, the white
each a tiny diamond.
After all, there is not much comfort in
buying gems of high price when a Bowery
salesman at $lB a week can wear Rhine
stone*. or paste that look exactly like them,
at $1 to $5 each, according to size.
TUB SnATCHKN.
Did you ever see a “shatoben?”
Not on the stage; a real shatcheD, I
mean, walking along the streets, wearing
good clothes, advertising in the newspapers
when they will let him, looking like a pros
perous merchant and taking his queer busi
ness quite as n matter of course? Chance
threw me in the way of such a man the
other dav. He was a strongly built man,
past middle age, with a kindly anil benevo
lent countenance which scarcely betrayed
his Hebraic extraction. He hud been in tbe
country but a short time and was amazed
to flud tbat the business of running a matri
monial agency was regarded here as a little
“off color.”
Of oour.-e this shatchen comes from Ger
many, where matrimonial brokers flourish
much better than with us. I know a
wealthy landed proprietor iu the Rhenish
Palatinate who remains a bachelor for same
romantic reason. He is fairly postered by
shatebens, who persist m coming to him
and saying: “I know a lovely girl, beaute
ouj. young, accomplished, kind, sprightly,
and heiress to 100,000 marks. You can mar
ry her if you will. Como, why not?”
All of which seems very strange in this
land of freedom and Sunday evening court
ing.
FICTION IN NEWSPAPERS.
The practice of publishing fiction iu news
papers has evidently come to stay. A few
years ago publ.shers wore afraid of serials
aud confined themselves to printing short
stories, usually borrowed b dily from some
English publication. By the way, the pro
cess works both ways, i have seen in au
English newspaper office a fiction editor in
the vary aot of transferring an article from
Puck, pictures and all.
Now serials are freely used by all the
publishers. Within the past few weeks
readers of the Sunday papers have had their
choioo between serials by William Black,
Conan Doyle, Frank Stockton, Haggard,
Kipling and many lesser lights. One of the
very best of these serials is Irving Baohel
ler’s “Master of Silence,” which has been
running in the Herald. It has a subject
and method of treatment in which many
readers would feel no interest, but no one
who has ever speculated upon the occult
forces of the natural human inind could lay
down an installment unfinished. Mr. Baoti
eller had good opportunities to publish the
story in book form, but deliberately pre
ferred the newspaper medium as opening
for him a far wider circle of readers tha t
any book could do.
The magazine people needn’t fear. This
is a reading age, and there ibe plenty of
room for them.
PRITHEE, DON’T GROW OLD.
A good many people in New York think
they have mastered the secret of eternal
youth, or at least of preserving a youthful
appearance far past the usual dateof craw’s
feot and wrinkles. ' The secret is 1 ‘facial
massage.” All the queer little furrows and
wrinkles caused by the plows, harrows,
horse rakes and other figurative agricultural
implements of Father Time, are the result of
fixity of the muscles, lack of elastiicty, over
exercise of seme and total disuse of others.
All this the masseur or masseuse undertakes
to cure by kneading and rubbing and pinch
ing tbe skin aud flesh of tbe cheeks, chin,
forehead ana temples, by stroking the dark
ened ring3 under the eyes, and giving the
features a general overhauling. And it
works, too. Only if an amateur under
takes the job, the victim is apt to exclaim:
"Oucb! You hurt!”
Why people should want to take all the
meaning and obaracter out of their faces in
this fashion, and reduce themselves to the
likeness of smooth, pretty dolls, I can’t un
derstand, but they do. Eveu men are not
seldom guilty of the vanity.
MR. HOWELLS’ RETURN.
William Dean Howells’ decision to raturn
to New York to live is not surprising.
Boston still remains the best city in tho
country to sell books in, but hardly to write
or publish them. It is a little inconvenient
to have to cross two s'ates to got to one's
office, as Mr. Howells has found.
The author of “A Modern Instance” is a
thoroughly good fellow and with scaroely
a trace of the cynicism, and none of the
snobbishness, which people fancy they see
in his work. He is very witty, courteous
and companionable and, withal a sincere
socialist, who believes in nationalism in
everything, and is always ready to go as
far in it*advocacy as hi3 publishers will let
iiim, as those who remember Conrad Dry
foos and Minister Peck will readily admit.
Borne of tho more advanced socialists are
inclined to find fault with Mr. Howells for
not being more bold in his advocacy, but he
has a family to support, and, really, a man
must live. *
It’s very easy to call a man a literary
dude when you haven’t seen him.
COL. SHEPARD’S ENGLISH BUSES.
I’ve often wondered why no more use is
made iu this country of omnibuses with
seats on top. The Fifth Avenue Stage Com
pany runs eight on pleasant days, all im
ported from England, and I’ve seen people
waiting at the street corners while one of
the old fashioned ’buses goes by in the hopes
that one of the new one* would come along
next. Tbev have the familiar little spiral
iron staircase on tho back platform by
which ladies can mount the roof easily, and
there's nothing finer than a ride on top on
a fresh June day.
Perhaps in ten years more the guide booK
makers will advise visitors to Now York to
ride all over town on the tops of buses and
cars, but the buses and can will first have
to be built two-storied.
THE TOMBS TRANSFORMED.
One of the good old landmarks of New
York is losing some of its ancient character.
The Tombs prison ha* long been a favorite
with the sightseer, as one of the few exam
ples of pure Egyptianasque architecture iu
the country. Anything but a prism would
have looked supremely ridiculous in this
gloomy, windowless stylo, but as it is anew
terror is added to the usual consequences of
wrong doing by the chance of being im
mured in such a dark above-ground sepul
cher.
However,the Tombs will never look quite
so gloomy again. An utterly incongruous
but very cheerful addition of yellow bricks
is rising upon its blackened granite. As no
body ever beard of a two-storied Egyptian
tomb the etyle really had to be abandoned,
but the result is very peculiar.
MR. FLOWER’S POPULARITY.
The streng.h which Flower is developing
in the New York cam toss is surprising to
SAVANNAH, GA., SUNDAY, JUNE 21, 1891.
some people. The fact that Mr. Flower is
most popular where he is best known, up
among the farmers of Jefferson county, is
certainly not agnist him. The fact is, Mr,
Flower, though very wealthy, is a plain
man personally, is easily approaohed and
never puts on airs. Owen Langdon.
THE SUICIDE CLUB.
Points About a Famous Order for
Those Who Are Tired of Life.
From the Xew York Herald.
Bridgeport, Conn., June 14.—The dis
covery that Landlord E. F. Sohmidt of
Birmingham, who took his life last week,
was a member of the famous Bridgeport
Suicide Club has again brought that grew
some organization into prominence. The
history of this peculiar cjub dates back
some six years. As origins ly organized its
membership was limited to six. Upon their
death the club was to become extinct, and it
was not intended that there should be a->y
deviation from this plan, but, incredible as
it may seem, as soon as the existenoe of the
club became known tho organizers wore be
seiged with applications for membership,
and the orignal six grew to eighteen.
None but the initiated have ever known
what the prescribed qualifications for mem
bership are. All candidates were bound by
a fearful oath before they were even sub
jected to au examination.
It is one ot the rules of the order that at
least two of the members shall shuttle off the
mortal coll each year i>y their own hands,
but it has never been known to outsiders
whether lots are drawn to deeido the vic
tims for the sacrifice, or whether the metn
cers are sworn at initiation to destroy them
selves within o stated time. Certainly the
mortuary record of the club has been kept
up with fearful regularity, as is attested
by the following list of suicides of its mem
bers:
First Year—August Heisterhngen, found
dead in a cellar, with a bullet hole iu his
head and a revolver iu his hand.
Joseph Kopp, shot himself in bed.
Second Year—George Leavenworth, died
in Case’s hotel from laudanum self-adminis
tered.
William Meckel, cut his throat with a
razor in his room on Bank street.
Third Year —John Kianzy, shot himself
through tho heart with a rifle iu the cellar
of his saloon on Main street.
Jphn Schneider, threw himself in fron t of
a locomotive on South avenue, but said by
some to have been au accident.
Fourth Year —-John Mottern, hanged
himself in the shop where he worked, on
Bank street.
Wendol Baum, cut his throat with a jack
knife la New York.
Fifth Year— W. H. Mnhy, fired a bullet
into his brain from a revolver.
E. F. Schmidt, blew his brains out with
a shotgun at his hotel iu Birmingham.
This remarkable list is pretty conclusive
tbat two must die a year, aud it is gener
ally believed that the year in which the
horrible deed must be done is fixed at the
time they are admitted to membe ship.
It is also pretty well established that an
other cardinal rule of tbe Suicide club is
that the death penalty must be inflicted on
one’s self in the most painful way of sboot
iug out of tbe brain or cutting of the throat.
These excruciating methods of death are
made mandatory, as it is considered effemi
nate to die by poison, asphyxia or other
similar methods.
It will be noticed in the above list tbat of
the ten members who have paid the awful
penalty of membership in theolub five have
fulfilled the obligation by bullet, one by
razor, one bv locomotive, one by jackknife,
ono by hanging and one only by poison.
Although poison is strictly prohibited and
future punishment is supposed to follow
any member who violates his oath in this
manner, yet thore is just oue instance when
it is permissible to use this means of death.
When the time arrives for a man to die,
and for some reason be wants to live a short
time longer, he may go to a member whoso
demise is fixed at, a later day and propose to
him an oxchango of dates. If this person
proves obliging and is willing to act ns
a substitute for his wavering fellow mem
ber ho may do so, and as a compensation
for this sacrifice ho is allowed to die by
poison.
Tho member who thus gets au extension
of time must die by the most excruciating
method, and he can have but one extension
of time.
It w 11 be noticed that of the ten suicides
half lived in Bank street, and one who lived
elsewhere committed suicide in a hotel
thore. Three lived iu the same house, and
two suicides wera committed in the same
room.
The organization has now a world-wide
reputation, aud recently the secretary re
ceived two applications for membership
from Caen, France.
ON3 OF 8L WATSKra TRIOS S.
When Five Hundred Dollars Was
Needsd She Pointed It Out.
From the New York Telegram.
"The marvels which the late Mme. Bla
vatsky used to perform,” said a professor of
Columbia College, who is deeply interested
in the study of Buddhistic writings, "were
as wonderful os those of Alladiu with his
lamp, even more so, for she did not need a
lump to help her to accomplish them. A few
years ago, whi'e she was in this city, I wit
nessed one of these feats. I had been invited
to attend a banquet given at a promi
inent hotel here by a son of the loading
theosophist, many of whom had been con
verted to the Buddhistic belief by the
madamo herself. Just before the dinner
was served I was standing with a little
group of persons, among whom were Mme.
Blavat'ky and one of her most faithful and
energetic supporters. ‘What a pity it is,’
he remarked, ’that we are so hard pressed
for funds. We really need money very
badly. If we only hod SSOO now we might
get on very well.’
"There was silenoe for a moment; then
Mme. Blavatskv, pointing to a mahogany
cabinet in the corner of the room, said
quietly: ‘lf you will look into the top
drawer of that piece of furniture vou will
find the money we need.’ He did as she
suggested, and on opening thodrawer found
a crisp SSOO bill. Now, this story
may seem utterly incredible, but I
witnessed the scene and can vouch for its
truth. Whether it was all arranged before
haud or not, I cannot say, but it certainly
was carried nut just as I have described it
to you. If Mme. Blavatsky was acting she
played her part remarkably well. It is
curious to note in connection with this inci
dent that the ma-lame hers -If never seemed
to have much money."
H. B. Randolph, Brunswick, Ga., writes:
“I was under the care of nine different
doctors, but not one did me the good that
Botanic Blood Palm has done me.”—Ad.
Chinese helmets, light Bombazine bats, at
LaFar’s. — Ad.
Straw hats nre bad stock to carry over.
We have a big stock left to our sorrow.
Don’t wait, you need anew one now. Save
money by looking at our price. Kohler,
the lively clothier, 158 Broughton street.—
Ad.
Yachting caps, white, black aud Blue, at
LaFar’s.— Ad.
VULGAR ENGLISH WOMEN
BAB ON LONDON'S GREAT GAM
BLING SCANDAL
And the Women Who Are Mixed Ud
in It—" For Sheer, Downright Vul
garity" the English W.mah is Su
preme-Strong Words From a i right
Woman Tha Summer Girl and
Freckles—What is Love?-Two Views
of the Divine Feeling—Why Love is
I ika Ice Cream—The Eraln’s Spring
Disease A Woman Who Dreams
Racing "‘lips.”
New York. June 20. —What do you
think of the Oordon-Cuimning affair?
What do you think of the women who are
mixed up in it ? Don’t they strike you as a
pretty low lot? And doesn’t the bad blood
of tho so-called aristocracy come out most
beautifully in this scandalous affair? And
do you think his royal highness, Albert
Edward, Prince of Wales, has convinced
the world of his anility as a blockhead?
For my own part I don’t care whether the
man is guilty or not; my sym
pathies are with him. Suppose I
said to you: “Come and stay a
week at my country house; we are going to
have a very jolly party;” and you said:
“Thank vou; It will give me great pleas
ure.” You came, and we concluded to play
cards; the first night everything went off
all right; the second night I bad a funny
little feeling about the way you were act
ing, aud I made up my mind there would
be uo more card* played there. You were
my guest, and no matter what you did in
other places, I couldn’t permit you to dis
honor yourself and me iu my house. An
other thing—it may have been a mistake.
The hostess who lets a mistake happen a
second lime causes it to become a blunder,
and you all kuow that a blunder is worse
than a crime.
But, no,
THIS HOSTESS TATTLED AND CACKLED
aud forgot her duty as a hostess as well as
the decent behavior that should characterize
a woman. Now tho wretchod mau is
brought into court. Who sit* beside the
chief justice, or whatever he is? His pret y
wife. The court is filled with society women.
What do you think of that? Bupycse that
had happened here. Suppose that a troop
of fashionable women went to soo the morti
fication and suffering of a man who had
either cheatod and was suffering because of
his crime, or wqo was innocent aud was
suffering ten times more in thut case. Do
you know what would have happened if an
all-sufficient Englishman had seen this here ?
He would have gone home and he would
have told the people all about it, and dilated
for hours on the vulgarity of the American
w man. For sheer, downright
vulgarity there is no type of the
American woman that can compare to her
equal in tho English woman, high or low,
rich or poor, and I who say this love with
all my heart some English women; think
them charming, and count them by dearest
frie.ud3; but just now I am generalizing.
An English woman will think more of a
sovereign than au American woman will of
twenty, and if some lady of doubtful repu
tation, with an overwhelming title, chose
to sit and witness a criminal case, it does
seem queer that she can get all the fashion
able set to fellow at her heels. There ought
to be a thanksgiving in Eugland that the
Princess of Wales, tho most courteous of
gentlewomen, showed her disapprobation by
staying away. , lV
AN AMERICAN WOMAN’S IDEA OF HOSPI
TALITY.
The law of hospitality is stringent always,
and if the man under my roof, and who
pertakes of my hospitality, Is a horse thief,
it is my duty not to permit his being
lynched on tbe ground. After he has gone
away the people who are willing to accuse
him can do it. They have got to do it
openly, and not when he is under my pro
tection. And that protection means a
great deal when it comes from the hostess,
for, as in the east, the thief who seeks the
protection of the harem cannot be touched
eveu by the king himself; so in civilized
lands the man who is suspected should
at least be free from blame given by tho
hostess. If a woman can protect, a woman
can usually make mischief—in fact she is
about as accomplished in this art as any
combination that could be formed by a
monkey and a cat developed into a woman.
And tbat a woman will be found to be a
mischief-maker in this case that has become
so famous cannot be doubted. “To look for
the woman” should be the business of Sir
Gordon-Cumming’s lawyers and to accuse
her, no matter what should be her station
in life, is his right.
THE SUMMER GIRL AND FRECKLES.
Will you pieaso tell me why the girls
object to being freckled? I never heard a
man say he disliked them. They are un
usually an evidence of a healthy constitution
aud a girl with a fow freckles over her nose
and under her eyes is a much more delight
ful object than one who is pale, dead white,
and looks as if she didn’t know anything
about the sunshine of life or any other kind
of sunshine. A few freckles like a snub nose
have a certain piquancy, and yet on an
average one out of every ten girls all over
the United States asks “What will remove
freckles?” If she don’t trouble
herself and will accept my prescrip
tion the freckles won’t trouble the girl. If,
during the summer davs, she doesn’t clog
up her skin with powder and make it burn
with some sort of a wash, it she will permit
herself to perspire naturally and not be
dabbling off tne perspiration every half
hour or so, then she can be pretty certain
that the freckles are not even skin deep
and will disappear long before the autumn
days come. Nothing is so good for freckles,
in more senses than one, than selecting a
nice sunny spot, with trees back of you, a
pretty, bright umbrella to hoii over your
head and either an agreeable book to read
or a pleasant man to talk to. Your
skin slightly simmers: it gets warm enough
to whiten and you will be surprised after a
summer of this treatment to find in what
good condition your complexion will be.
If you must do something put a prepara
tion of two parts lemon juice and one part
Jamacia rum on your face at night. It
might strike a man as a novel way of tak
ing or making a gin sling, but it roaliy it
very good for the complexion; the rum
making the skin livelv am; the lemon juice
making it white and firm.
WHAT IS LOVE?
With the summer has commenced not
only the annual tirade against freckles, but
the sweet and sentimental inquiry as to
“What is love?” Love is very muoh the
creature of Impulse. One cynio of about
80, who has seen all of life and exhausted
it, announces that there is no such thing.
Another aged philosopher, who had seen
about 23 summers, thought that love was of
little use unless *‘a woman had beeu every
where and seen everything and could make
it interesting for a fellow.” For my own
part, I don't think the woman who had been
everywhere and seen everything would
bother herself about the philosophical youth
of 23.
TWO VIEWS OF A DIVINE FEELING.
A young woman with deiioious < blue eyes
and brown hair said that “love Was heav
enly,” but theu she had only been engaged
twenty-four *hours, and her exp'-tepce was
k t'-SLmJ . '‘S.s
limited to a solitaire diamond ring and a
bunch of orchids. A little woman who bad
been married eight years, and who was tbe
proud possessor of two pairs of twins, an
nounced '‘that love was all very well in its
way, and that the first year or two of your
married life you were always de
votedly fond of Charley, but when
it came to real satisfaction, give her
babies!” Nobody denied her her privilege. A
man about fit), who really knew what he
was talking about, said that “Love was like
champagne—every fresh glass see mod the
Pest,” while a bachelor of 45 said, "You
know it is very nice to have a littlo woman
fond of you, and all that sort of toing, but
never allow yourself to get fond ot her; you
will spoil her.” Inasmuch as everybody
knew tbat he was under tbe complete con
trol of a woman who weighed about ninety
pounds, it was more than charming to bear
him make this announcement.
LOVE IS LIKE ICB CREAM.
For my own part, I think love is very
much like hokey-pokey ice cream. The day
is warm, the sign is attraotire, you stand
and road "Hokey-pokey ice cream, only I
cent a square.” You are weary, you are
warm, you feel in your pocket, you find the
cent, you know that you are going to get a
delicious mouthful that will make you, O!
so happy! You walk up to tho cart where
love—l mean hokey-pokey icecream —is
sold; you lay down your penny, you de
mand your square. It’s given to you on a
piece of brown paper; it looks fas
cinating; you walk buck to the pave
ment, ar.d you conclude not tutako it down
iu a gulp,but to enjoy it by slow mouthfuls.
At first it is delightful. The second mouth
ful is cool, but suggestive of oleomargarino;
the third mouthful is waxy and sticky; and
theu you take the last with a wry fare and
aro disgusted with yourself for buying it;
feel that it has upset your heart -I mean
your stomach—and that you never want
any more again. And you don’t, until the
next time you [are warm aud the enticing
hokey-pokey comes along to lead you to
uew loves and new pains.
THE BRAIN’S SPRING DISEASE.
I regard love as tbe spring disease of the
brain. The system is all upset, and wu take
sulphur and molasses aud spots come out on
our faces and we feel generally diabolical.
Then the heart and the orain get themselves
agitated, and tbe girls and hoys get to think
ing themselves the only persons In the world
who thoroughly .understand tbe advantage*
and delights of hokey-pokey ice cream—l
moan love—and so they rush out with their
complimentary coin seeking whom they
may devour. This springtime fancy may
lust during the summer days, hut at lasi,
like the hokey-pokey ico cream, it disap
pears in the early autumn and platnnies
and chestnuts take its place. I feel that I
have said all that 1 can about love. 1 trust
that I have given some tips to the unwary
as to the eating of hokey pokey or love.
A WOMAN’S RACING “TIP."
Apropos of tips, lam not a very super
stitious women, that is no more so than a
women who feels what lifa really is or ought
to be. But there was something about a
raoe the other day tbat seemed a little bit
odd. I bad no intention whatever of going,
but the uight before I dreamed that I was
there and that I saw the board go up an
nouncing tho winners. People wore con
gratulating me on having made so much
money, and I was frantically waving to the
horse as he was led off the track, and ex
pressing my devotion to the jockey, who
was as Dlacit us the ace of spades. When I
wakened up in the morning I bad tbe
paper brought me (I really would rather go
without roy coffee than my newspaper). I
said to the maid who brought it: “Find tho
racing column and let me stick a hairpin in
it.” Bhe held it au arm’s length from me so
that I could not pi ssibiy read. I stuck tbe
hairpiu in, and there it wus, same horse.
Theu 1 said: "I don’t know its number, but
I will count thirteen up and down until I
see which horse is thirteen.” Ybu won’t
mind iny saying “I’ll be jiggered” when I
discovered it was the same horse.
NO WONDER THE MEN LIKE HER.
That day I told my 6tory to two or three
men, and each one of I hem offered mo large
sums to put on it (§6O seems a very largo
sum to a woman), but I declined, for fear the
horse might lose. I didn’t go to the race,
but tho first news sent to mo by telegram
was that that horse had won I Now, every
man I know feels that I insulted him per
sonally, and kept him out of a good thing,
and that I did it on purpose! How could I
help it, that I was given a mysterious
-power? Tho objection that I have to it all
was, that it didn’t do the same the next
night, and give me the name of the winning
horse, for X should Lave plunged with the
enthusiasm of a donkey, and probably
would have lost. There is no special moral
to this story; it is just a statement of facts.
THINGS THAT ARE FUNNY AND OTHERWISE.
Facts are s imetirnes funny things.
It is a fact that if we want to live we have
got to pay our bill-i; that isn’t funny.
It is a faot that it v, e go to the races and
bet we occasionally win, and that is funny.
It is a faot that the little babie3 are going
to suffer terribly, and die from lack of food
and care in this great, rich city, and that is
not funny.
It is a fact that a girl who has once been
told her waist is small will draw herself iu
until she looks like an elongated hour-glass,
and that is funny.
It is a fact that there are some men who
are brutal and Belflsti iu their own homes,
and polite and delightful outside of them,
and that is not funny.
It is a fact; that a red paraßol with a nice
giri under it can do a great deal toward in
fluencing a young man, and that is funny.
It is a fact that there are thieves, crimi
nals, liars, scandal-mongers and doers of all
evil, who, if they had ever the chance, or
had over had a helping hand put out to
them, wouldn’t bo what they are, and that
is not funny.
It is a faot that there is no subject a
woman likes to talk about as much as her
self, and that is funny.
It is a fact if I keep thrusting facts on
you you will throw your paper down, and
you will say, “That is not funny.” Bab.
Stand Your Ground.
When you make up your mind to take
flood’s Sarsaparilla, do not be induoed to
buy some other preparation instead.
Clerks may claim that "ours is as good as
Hood’s” and all that, but the peculiar merit
of Hood’s Sarsaparilla cannot be equaled.
Therefore have nothing to do with substi
tutes. ar.d insist upon having Hood’s Sarsa
parilla, the best blood purifier and building
up medicine. — Ad.
All Roads Lead to Sternberg's.
Diamonds,
Watches,
Silverware,
Chains,
Charms,
Birthday Hinge,
Ladies’ Stick Fins,
Ornaments,
Clocks, Kings, Etc.
The most complete Jewelry Establishment
in Georgia. A few Bargains still
Ileft on our Second Floor.
Sternberg' a.
— Adv.
DRY GOODS.
ECKSTEIN’S
GREAT HALF PRICE
SALE STILL GOES ON ’
Will Sell on Monday! Monday! Monday
ISO PIECES PINEAPPLE TISSUES
Lovely Style i! Fast Colors! Perfect Beauties
SACRIFICED AT 10 cts.
Will Sill ON WfOHESDIT! WEONESOATN WEONESUTt
15,000 YARDS EMBROIDERIES.
In Regular Lengths Only. No Cutting.
25cts. GOODS FOR 15cts-
B-L-A-Z-E-R-S !
New Lot Now Open.
LADIES’ SHIRT WAISTS
Fine Variety Just Opened.
Grenadines Half Price!
15 Cts. Lace Lawns, 8 Cts.
Dress Laces 25c. and Up.
GUSTAVE ECKSTEIN k CD.
CLOTHING.
SPECIAL BARGAINS
FOR THIS WEEK.
The ladies are having a picnic in the
dry goods line, and we are determined
that the men shall fare likewise. So here
goes for THIS WEEK ONLY.
Men’s Mohair Coats and
Vests, all shades at 83, 84, 85,
86; former prices 84,85, 86, $7 50.
Men’s Striped Flannel Coats
and Pants reduced to 810 and
812; formerly sl3 50 and sl6,
Mens’ White Flannel Suits,
$lO and 814; reduced from 813 50
and 818.
Large line of Men’s Linen
Suits in solid and fancy colors;
also Linen and Seersucker
Pants, White Duck and Flan
nel Pants, and any kind of
pants you can want at a
discount of 25 per cent.
REMEMBER THIS WEEK ONLY.
DRYFUS BROS.,
181, 181 l-J 183 Congress Street, Corner Jefferson.
PAGES 9 TO 12.
Men's Neglige, Puff and Silk
Shirts, in all styles and colors,
we will sell at a reduction of 10
to 25 per cent. We carry the
largest line of these goods in
this city. Our 75c. and $1
shirts have never been equaled.
Children’s Linen Suits at
$1 25, reduced from $1 75.
Men’s Gauze Undershirts re
duced to 25c.
White Jeans Drawers, 25c.;
these goods are sold every
where at 40c. and 50c.
Straw Hats at a sacrifice.
