Atlanta semi-weekly journal. (Atlanta, Ga.) 1898-1920, July 31, 1902, Image 4

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Atlanta semi-weekly journal., July 31, 1902, Page 4, Image 4

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Newspaper Page Text4 The Semi-Weekly Journal Entered at tbe Atlanta Postoffice as Mall Mat ter of the Second Cteaa. • ■ The Semi Weekly Journal la pnb 11 sh ed on Mondays and Thursday*. and mailed - tn time tor all the week star route mat la. It contains the news from all porta o< the world brought over a special leased wire into The Journal office. It has a staff of distinguished contributors, with strong Agricultural. Veterinary. Juvenile. Home. Book and other departments ot special value to the home and farm. Agents wanted In every community tn the South. Itettifvan.es may be made by post office money order, express money or der. registered letter or check Peranns who send postage stamps tn payment for subscriptions are request ed to send those at the >-cent doaoml nation. Amounts larger than M <*"« poMoffiee order, express order, check or registered malL Subscribers who wish their papers ehanged should give both the old and the new roetoffle* address NOTICE TO THE PVBLIC-Tbe only traveling representatives of The Journal are C. X O'Farrell and X A. Bryan Any other who represents him self as ccnneceed with The Journal as will be re»i'-ar»tb‘ *• only ror money p»»** to the above named representatives. THURSDAY. JULY >k I*C Anyhow, the horees can't stop and ask each other "Is my hat on straight T’ The hungriest hog on record recently bit a piece out of a New Jersey politician. A Chicago mnn has made the startling Ctscovery that l.ta wife Is a spendthrift. Mr.•Jeffries is now open for negotia tions with the champion of the senate. San Francisco has a per capita barroom system and the per capita Is frightfully low. The Philippine friars may be relied upon to furnish the fly for the Oyster Bay oint ment. ‘ A form book for letters to their wives ■sems to be sadly needed by some of our eonsuls. Refleetlcns of a bachelor: Ifcivid B. HIE digesting W. J. Bryan s hnrmony banqvet receipts. The Chicago papers are making spreads on the story of a Juror who was offered a bribe and didn't take it. A committee of senators will soon sail for Hawaii. What an out-of-the way place for a prize fight! A couple ran away from the insane ward at Bel’evue hospital and sot mar ried. They will be Pert back. If Venezuela. Colombia and Hayti eould only bunch their revolutions perhaps one of them could chalk up a score. That North Carolina star boarder who took his landlord’s wife emphasised the proverbial selfishness of his clan. Those Texas Democrats who took 6.000 or more ballots in a convention deadlock will be tn fine condition for the fall elections. Jf the report of "Lord - ’ Beresford’s sojourn at Hot Springs be true, we would advise the authorities to nail down the springs. Judging from their present bill, had the McKinley doctors saved their patient they would doubtless want the entire treasury. Maybe the senate might survive tho k>*s of Spooner, but it would be hard to get another such referee for those little diversions. If those Italians want a real up-to-date Campanile they should consult an Amer ican architect who makes skyscrapers a specialty. The most striking effect of the Dingley tariff is that ft enables the foreigner to buy American made goods cheaper than our qwn people. That heavy set gentleman crowding the president and King Edward out of the front test is Mr. James J. Jeffries, of San Francisco. Cal. According to the newspaper reports Captain Hobson is dividing his time between Immersions, medals and matri monial engagements. Our able secretary of war is studying the Gettysburg battlefield. This indioates that Mr. Root is making a conscientious effort to fit himself for bis job. If many more prominent New York Democrats decline the gubernatorial nom ination the party should resort to the want column? of ths newspapers. It is announced that though the Boer war Is over Great Britain will cling to the American mule. It is hard to find a more faithful friend or a more helpful ally. A Chicago man insists that the assess ment »of his taxable property be raised frem CMOM to $473,000. This disease is very rare In Chicago and all other cities. We may now expect a tremendous In crease in Immigration from Ireland. A United States softer In full dress unifbrm has been visiting bis old friends in Dub lin. Owing to clerical error the poor coal trust has only a few million tons of anthracite on hand to meet the advanced prices caused by the strike. Ain't It a shame? * Notwithstanding Hanna’s light against the Nicaragua canal he has asked Nica ragua to release Dr. Wilson, and Doc's friends are preparing to celebrate his home coming. Roosevelt denies the rumor that his fall speech-making will l.e in aid of the Republican can.peign. and unless he Im, proves on that Arlington effort we will not dispute his word. We fear that the Texas oil discovery has turned the bead of some of Its news papers The Galveston News actually has h the gall to boast of Texas watermelons with Georgia only 800 miles away. The lightning has played some queer pranks this summer. It cut off the whis kers of a Pennsylvania man the other day. and a little later scared the rheuma tism out of a citizen of Rhode Island. The Montgomery Advertiser has dabbled in Georgia politics to the extent of ob serving that "somebody mgy have com mitted ’the crime of TV but the Georgia Democratic convention refused to indict them.” The Pullman car conductors have had their salaries raised. We have long thought that they should receive a com pensation somewhat nearer the size of the Income of the porters who work un der them. Some of the steel trust qfockbolders are said to be disappointed at the prospect that the profits of the concern will be only SMO.OOfi.OW this year. Fourteen per cent is cruelly short rations for a gang that is so greedy as Schwab A Co. Governor Longlno, of Mississippi, has received the cordial praise of the press tn all parts of the country for refusing to permit influence and threats to cause hhn to interpose and save two murderers from the galluws. Governors with grit of this quality are the kind that every state needs. < FIGHTING THE OLEO LAW. The bill passed by congress at its last session for the purpose of stamping out the oleomargarine industry is so unjust that we cannot suppress our gratification at the fact that it is not proving as ef fective as it was desired to be. Manufacturers of oleomargarine arc complying strictly with the provision of this act that they must put no coloring taatter in their product. They send out this pure and wholesome article in pack ages of various sizes to suit purchasers and with every package goes a sufficient quantity of coloring matter to give the substance an agreeable appearance. It is the same sort of coloring matter that nearly all of the dairies use to give their product the golden glow that is taken by the average citizen to Indicate superior quality. The manufacturer, wholesaler, or retailer may not color the oleomargarine he offers for sale, but there is nothing to prevent him from throwing in a separate package the contents of which will enable the purchaser to give any desired hue to the white substance he buys. It is very little trouble to do this at home, and when it has been done it is al most impossible, by sight or taste, to distinguish oleomargarine from Jersey butter. The backers of the class legislation which Imposes a special and onerous tax upon the poor man's excellent substitute for butter may try to make congress go further and forbid the giving away of coloring matter with packages of oleo margarine. It would not. in view o/ their record, ba very surprising if they should endeavor to induce state legislatures, or even congress, to forbid the coloring .of oleomargarine even at the homes where it is to be used. There is no danger that they will seek to prohibit the sale of coloring matter, for that would interfere very seriously with the common habit of Improving the ap pearance of butter. There's millions to the dairy trust In the coloring of pale butter, and the practice of this method of deceiving butter buyers is increasing constantly. Those who would run oleo margarine out of the market by taxing it to a practically prohibitive point, not by proving that it is unwholesome—for that cannot be done—pose as the champions of pure and honest butter, and yet those who represented them in congress rejected ev ery proposition to impose a penalty upon coloring of butter They demand that oleomargarine shall not bq permitted to enter the market un der false colors, but Insist that butter shall have full right to do so. The makers ot oleomargarine are in another way defeating to some extent the unjustifiable attack upon their business by a prostitution of the federal authority. They have found that palm oil gives a fine color to oleomargarine and very little of it, Is required to effect that result. It also improves the quality of oleomargartqp. . The commissioner of Internal revenue in reply to inquiries on the subject has stat ed that he finds nothing in the law to for bid such a use of palm oil. A distinct victory has thus been gained for oleo margarine. But its enemies will probably endeavor to have prohibited the use of palm oil to Improve an article of food that millions of our people desire to use Insteed of butter and feel that they should not be taxed on account of this prefer ence. WOMEN IN JAPAN- About the best evidence that Japan has tn recent years made marvelous progress in civilization is to be found in the great ly Increased respect for the rights of wo men. Thirty years ago Japanese women had practically no rights before the law; now they have many. Their emancipation has progressed remarkably during this gen eration. Already Japan is setting an ex ample in this respect to some nations who boast much more loudly than she does about civilisation and refinement. A recent instance in Yokohama indicates to what extent this real reform has ad vanced. A Japanese wife refused to perform cer tain labor at her husband's command be cause she considered it degrading. If a Japanese wife had taken that stand 30 years ago she would probably have been beaten into submission. But the Japan of today is not the Japan of that period. When the husband of this protesting wife attempted to divorce her on account of disobedience, she laid her case before the court, which took her side, declaring that she was not bound to obey demands of her husband which were clearly unreason able. The liberal Japanese press halls this de cision as a righteous victory for women, and declares that it will be of Immense benefit to many wives who have been op pressed by brutal husbands. We wonder if Japan has any laws like those of S 3 of the 45 states of this dazzling center of civilization which give a father an authority over his children superior to that of their mother, without regard to the relative parental qualifications of the two? OUR JU RY SYSTEM. A determined effort is being made in Illi nois to abolish the requirement of unanimity for the verdict of a jury. Some of the leading lawyers of that state have joined in a recommendation that three-fourths of a jury may «nake a verdict in civil suits and the proposed change will be considered by the next legislature. A jury reform like that now being advo cated in Illinois has been proposed in other states but. so far as we have ob served, has not found much favor in any of them. The question has been discussed at sev eral meetings of the Georgia Bar Associa tion. but there is reason to believe that a large majority of the lawyers of this state and a still larger proportion of the people are decidedly opposed to any de parture from the rule of unanimity for Jurors. The south is notably the most conserva tive part of the countiy, and it will be a long time before any state in this sec tion will consent that the present jury system shall be tampered with in any way. CANAL PROSPECTS. There are wide differences of opinion both as to where the actual work of com pleting the Panama canal will begin and as to the length of time that will be i required for finishing It. Senator Spooner, author of the resolu tion which was submitted for the Nica ragua canal bill, that had passed the house almost without opposition, believes that the company owning the present Panama franchises and property will be able very soon to proffer to our govern ment a title that will be absolutely sound and satisfactory. On the other hand. Senator Morgan, who fought for the Nicaragua route until he realized that it was a choice between the Spooner revolution and nothing, is as firm THE SEMI-WEEKLY JOURNAL, ATLANTA, GEORGIA, THURSDAY, JULY 31, 19U3. as ever in his conviction that the canal will at last be built across Nicaragua in stead of Panama, because we cannot get a perfect title to the Panama property. There is much discussion in France over the matter. In a recent interview published by the Paris Figaro Charles De Lessops said that the Panama canal can be completed with out locks in six years. He was in charge for his father of the work done there by the original company and should know what he Is talking about when he states that $362,000,000 was expended by that company. He considers that the United States got a great bargain when it secured the right to take the entire assets of the company for $40,000,000. Much of the work that was done years ago on this great enterprise is still in good condition and. according to Charles De Lesseps, $150,000,000 will complete the canal with locks. He per sists, however. In his preference for the original plan of building it without locks and predicts that it will be Anally adopted. The son rejoices in the prospect of see ing his father's pet project carried but and says that were his father living he would be pleased also. He adds: "This is not the first time that France has con ceived a grand idea without herself profit ing by it.” t It seems to be conceded that Colombia will interpose no serious objection to any thing that may be necessary to our gov ernment's canal work on its territory. In fact, all Colombian difficulties that seemed not long ago to loom up in the way of this magnificent undertaking are disappearing rapidly. But there is a very general and perhaps well-founded scepticism as to the average estimates of the time necessary to the completion of the work. llje opinion of Charles De Lesseps that th# canal can be completed in six years Is ridiculed by eminent engineers, both in trance and the United States. We will be fortunate if the first ship shall pass through it within twice as long a time from now. OUR SPAT WITH JAPAN. The relations between the United States and Japan for more than fifty years have been so cordial that whatver differences may arise between them now will surely be settled in a friendly way. \ The two governments, however, have conflicting claims to Marcos Island in the Pacific, which contains very valuable gu ano deposits. The Island lies about a thousand miles west of Japan and about 4,600 miles from our shores. It Is contended that the island was dis covered thirteen years ago by Captain Rosehill, a citizen of the United States, who promptly raised his country's flag over it an<j wrote out a paper setting forth his claim to the discovery. But Japanese have settled on Marcos Island and taken possession of it. Rosehill complained to our state depart ment and asked its protection. He was informed that the United States could interfere no further than to con firm the priority of his claim, if he can ptove it. The Impatient captain, however, has set out from Honolulu, two thousand miles away to assert his own claim to Marcos Island. He goes on a schooner with a small force of men. The Japanese government, hearing of this movement, sent an American-built battleship with a message from our gov ernment that he must not attempt at present to evict the Japanese occupants of the Island. When Rosehill arrives he will be con fronted with this order and will, of course, have to desist. » The Japanese claim that they discovered the island as far back as 1879 and for mally annexed it in 1898. It is therefore a question of fact to ba settled. If Captain Rosehill can prove that he Is the real discoverer of the island our government will take and hold it- If, on the contrary, Japan can establish her right of discovery the United States will recognize it. There does not seem to be the slightest possibility of a fight over the matter. THE PLOT THICKENS. War to the knife between the president and the obstructionists of Cuban recip rocity seems certain. The New York Tribune, one of the president's stanchest supporters, declares that the enemies of bis Cuban policy are in a conspiracy to "ruin the island first, and then steal it" This is a very ferocious attack upon a large number of prominent Republicans in both houses of congress to come from the leading organ of their party. Senator Burton, of Kansas, has added fuel to the flames by asserting that most of the Republican senators who posed as friends of the Cuban reciprocity bill were hypocrites, and that "there are not 15 Republican senators out of the 54 who are honestly in favor of the present bill.” President Roosevelt is said to realize that he has been tricked by some men upon whom he relied, and his wrath against them burns hot. All subterfuges and disguises that may have been resorted to by the president’s pretended supporters will be exposed be fore long. The last session of congress was marked by an almost unprecedented amount of strife among Republicans, but we may expect to see a conflict in that divided political household at the next session that will make its former wrangles seem tame indeed. President Roosevelt has need of all the strenuoslty that his most ardent admirers have ever given him credit for. IMMENSE FARM VALUES. The value of the farm property in the United States is so enormous that very few persons know how many figures it re quires to express it. The extent to which it has increased be tween 1890 and 1900 is astounding. But it is not after all surprising that a country containing three million square miles of territory, by far the greater part of which is productive, and more than seventy-five millions at people should make a showing of agricultural wealth that can be approached by no other na tion. In 1900 there were four times as many farms in the United States as there were !in 1850. The increase of the number of farms between 1890 and 1900 was 25 per cent, a rate that no other country approx imated. The Increase in the value of farms in ths United States has been as remarkable as that of their number. In 1900 the number of farms was 5,739.067 and their total value was $16,674,894,274. The value of farm property increased 34.8 per cent from 1860 to 1900, thus keeping pace almost exactly with the increase of the number of farms. The increase of farm values was 7 per cent greater than that of the country’s population. The statement of the census bureau to the effect that the total value of farm products was 92.6 per cent greater in 1900 than it was in 1890 seems incredible until the qualification which the bureau places on it is considered. It is explained that the enumeration was much more complete in 1900 than it had ever been before. The big item of farm animals sold and slaughtered was not included in the farm values of 1890, but was taken in by the census of 1900 and increased those values 40 per cent. The wonderful growth of farm interests has not, however, been sufficient to check the trend o# population to the cities. The comparative growth of Chicago and that of the state of Illinois is a striking illustration in point. Chicago, with 1.099,860 people in 1890, had 1,698,675 tn 1900, a gain of 598,725. Illinois, outside qf Chicago, start ing with 2,726,501 people in 1890, had 3,122,- 975, a gain of only 396,474, in 1900. Many other comparisons of like charac ter and hardly less Impressive could be made. Another and an even more alarming ten dency is the rapid increase of wealth In a few hands. There is now one concern In the United States that has a capitalization one twelfth as great as the total value of all the farms in the country. Every year the number of immense for tunes increases and there is a correspond ing increase of the number of very poor persons. The drift of population to cities and of wealth Into the hands of comparatively a few persons is one of the greatest misfor tunes and gravest dangers of our time. ENLISTMENTS FOR PENSIONS. The Journal published Sunday a state ment relative to the rush for pensions by volunteers in the war with Spain, which would be absolutely incredible if it had not been complied from the records of the pension office. The official figures are given for five regular and five volunteer regiments who were in the United States army during the war with Spain. The regular regiments are the Sixth, Seventh, Sixteenth, Twenty-fourth and Thirtieth infantry. The volunteer regi ments are the Thirty-third and Thirty fourth Michigan, the First District of Co lumbia, the Ninth Massachusetts and the Eighth Ohio. It is shown that claims for pensions on account of service in the war with Spain have been filed by no less than 2,997 men who enlisted tn these volunteer regiments, though not a single man in any one of the five was killed, or even wounded,, and not one was missing. Many more than half the entire number of troops who were in these commands made a break for the pension office soon after the fighting in which they took no part. Not a drop of blood was shed for their country by any man in any one of these five regiments. Not one of them carried home a scar received in battle, but nearly three thousand of them have joined in a scandalous raid upon the treasury. The record of the five named regiments of regulars during tfae Spanish war and since contrasts very with that of these five gallant volunteer regiments. These regiments of regulars had 93 men killed, 471 wounded and 40 missing, and from all five regiments have come only 764 applications far pensions. The only reasonable conclusion from these figures Is that a very large propor tion of the five volunteer regiments nam ed enlisted for the money which they calculated to be in the job. They knew that •' war between the United States and Spain could not be a very serious matter and must be over tn a short time, and so they rushed into it as a good speculation. It certainly proved to be so for these unscathed heroes. Not one of their entire number smelled gunpowder, or received so much as a scratch. But 2,997 are now begging for pensions which will, If granted, cost the country millions of dollars to be paid out for nothing and worse than nothing. Such pensions will disgrace what should be a roll of honor through and through. We are glad to know that the fame of no regiment that went from the south to the war with Spain has been besmirched as the records show She five regiments we named have been. POINTED PARAGRAPHS. —'T-'- » Most excuses are not worth the trouble of making. When some men talk they don’t believe a word they hear. A model hueband Is one who Isn't patterned after a model. A email boy defines a headache as a stomach ache in the brain. Beware of the man who poses as the hero of his own stories. An opportunity of a lifetime is often merely a chance to say "no.” More things come to those who don't wait than to thoee who do. The new woman seems to have given up try ing not to be an old girl. No, Cordelia, a writer isn’t necessarily a bog because he lives by his pen. Some people are consistent only In running from one inconsistency to another. The way of the transgressor Is often hard, yet he seldom complains of tender feet. Speaking of auctions, tho most painful thing under the hammer is your thumbnail. When a woman Is troubled with indigestion she Imagines it is a case of broken heart. Cats may not be expert mathematicians, but it doesn’t take one long to foot up a column. The girl who boasts of being a “good fellow” either marries a fool or remains single al! her days , A man must put his best foot upward as well as forward If he would reach the top of the ladder. Any woman ean keep a secret pertaining to the fact that her new dress is but an old one made over. Some men are so conceited they imagine that when they take a walk everybody else admires the parade. That man who claims to be seeking new fields for his genius usually is looking for a place where he isn't so well known. REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR. Somehow girls aren’t galted to driving single. Virtue doesn't keep very well if it Is exposed to a hot sun. There are just as many April fools in every other month. Married life is a plain salad that needs a tip-top dressing. Life's thistle crop doesn't care a hang about wind, weather or rain. Garters would make some women blush as much by any other name. A straighout enemy is more of a friend than a devious friend is less of an enemy. • Moat women would despise themeelves if they were as innocent aatthey pretend to be. Usually the man who Is putting up a job on somebody else forgets to look behind him to see who is putting up a job on him. \ The woman whe knows how to provide her husband with a good breakfast needn't worry about providing intellectual companionship for hint. The Poet. God has given the poet an imagination so that he can have the pleasure of thinking of things he would do if he had money.—Chicago Record-Herald. SAM JONES WRITES ABOUT CROPS AND POLITICS IN THE GREAT WEST To The Atlanta Journal: AM UP in the northwest among the storms and floods. They tell me it has rained here 27 days and they look for 13 more, but their I crops stand the excess of rain better than the southern crops have stood the continual droughts. The crops are the finest in Missouri, Illinois. Indiana and Kentucky, where the rains have not been so excessive. The com acreage Is largest in history of United States, and promises largest yield per acre. The railroad travel was never heavier then now. All the hotels in Chicago are crowded, and this has been al ways their off season. July and Au gust nearly everybody is either going on a visit or going back home. Hotels crowded, street cars crowded, passen ger trains crowded and depots crow ded. My wife and two daughters joined me in Cairo last Wednesday. They are right out of the Georgia drought and heat and they are tired of the rain and cool atmosphere slready. We spent one day in Chicago and vjsited some of the mammoth department stores. We dined at the restaurant in Marshall Field's great store and the table wa» as immense as the great store. The service and the grub were immense. I said as I sat at the table with them that I was glad there were rich folks in the world. No poor man could run such a store or such a restaurant as that, and prices were so moderate. The store itself dazed us Georgians. We bought $2 worth of dry goods, ate $3 worth of grub and got out It look fed like it would take all the dry goods houses on Whitehall street to fill ten floors of Marshall Fields* great build ing. And there are several other houses in Chicago approximately as large, as Marshall Fields*. Fool and his money are soon parted in Chicago and then thafool must get. We only stayed one day There and then got. We are here in attendance upon the Monona Lake assembly, just across the lake from the city of Madison. The beautiful lake Monona, 3 miles Mr. Dooley Reviews the News of a Week, 'Copyright 1902 by Robert Howard Russell. HATS goln' on this week in th* pa-pers?” asked Mr. Hennessy. "Ivrything,” said Mr. “W Dooley. It’s been a turbyllnt week. I can hardly sleep lv nights thinkin' lv th’ doin’s lv people. Th’ camplnlly at at Venica has fallen down. ’Twas built in 1604 bath - Beexantiums an’ raystored tn 1402 be th’ Dogs. It fell down be cause th’ foundations was weak, be cause th’ wind blew, Because th' beau tiful figure lv th’ golden angel on top lv it was fifteen feet high. It will be rebuilt or maybe not. Th’ king of Italy has given thirty-three billion liars to put it up again an’ siv’ral ladln’ Ameri can arcbtects have offered to do th’ job, makin* an office bulldin’ lv it. Th’ camplnlly was wan lv th’ proudest monymlnts lv Italy an’ was used as a bell-tower at times an’ at othej times as a gasabo where anny American cud take a peek at th’ gran’ canal an’ com pare it with th’ Erie, th’ Pannyma an’ th’ dhrainage lv th’ same name. "Th* king iv England is betther. He’s off in his yacht. So ar-re Baking, Tre ves, Smith. Barlow, Jones, Casey, Dis ter, thank Hlven! A hard life is sci ence. He will go on with th’ cgwyna tlon as soon as th’ basting threads la taken out. Th’ Hon’rable Joseph Choate is raycoverin’ more slowly. He - still sobs occas’nally in his sleep an* - has ordbered all th’ undher slcretles to have their vermyform appindixes raymoved as a token iv rayspict f r th’ sthricken nation. Th’ Hon’rable Whitelaw Reid Is havin’ a cast tv his knee breeches madp which will be ex hibited in New Work durtn’ th’ com* In’ winter. "Me friend, J. Pierpont Morgan, baa been talcin' dinner with th’ Imprpr Wlllum. It ts undhersftud he will pre. slnt him to th’ Methropolytan Museum, lv Art. There are said to be worse there. "Lord Sallsberry has thrun up his job. Dord Sallsberry was wan iv th’ • grandest an’ mos’ succissful states men lv modhern times. He nlver did annything. He is succeeded be his nevvew, Misther Balfour, if I get th’ name right, who has done less. It is explcted that Mistner Balfour will have a good time. On rayceivln’ th’ congrathylatlons tv his collague, Mis ther Chamberlain, he bought blmsilf a rayvolver an’ took out a policy on his life. "A lady down east woke her husband up to tell him there was a burglar in th’ house. Th’ foolish woman. They’se always burglars in th’ house. That’s what burglars are for an’ houses. Instead lv argyln’ th’ pint in a loud voice, coughin' an* glvtn’ th’ burglar a chance to lave with dignity, this man got up an’ was kilt. Now th’ pa-apers with th’ assistance iv th' ‘ officers iv th’ law has discovered that th’ lady took a boat ride with a gin tleman friend in th’ summer lv sixty two, that she wanst quarreled with her husband about th’ price lv a hat, that wan iv her lower teeth is plugged, that she wears a switch an' that she weeps whin she sees her children. They’se a moral in this. It’s ayether don’t wake a man up out iv a sound sleep, or don’t get out iv bed till ye have to, or don't bother a burglar whin ye see he’s busy, or kill th* iditor. I don’t know which it is. "Wlllum Jennings Bryan is reedin’ me friend Grover Cleveland out iv th’ party. He’s usin’ th’ Commoner to read him out. That’s a sure way. "Mary McLane has been in town. I didn’t see her, me place not bein’ a raysort f*r th’ young an’ yearln’ an* especially me duckin' all lithry ladies iv whatlver sex. Mary Lane is th’ author lv a book called: ’Whin I am 'older I’ll know betther.’ Ye ought to read it, Hlnnissy. ‘‘Th’ Newport season is opened with gr-reat gayety an’ th’ aim iv ray turnln’ hushands is much more sure. “Gin’ral Bragg fr’m up in Wiscon sin has been gettin* into trouble with our haughty, allies, th’ Cublans; he writin' home to his wife that ye might as well thry to makq a whistle out iv a pig’s tail as a dacint man out iv a Cublan. Gin’ral Bragg will be bounced an’ he ought to be. He don’t belong in pollytics. His place is Idi tor lv a losin’ newspaper. “Gov’nor Taft has been in Rome showin’ th’ wurruld how succissful. sthraightforward, downright, outspo ken, manly, frank, fourteen ounces to th’ pound American business dallngs can be'again’ th’ worn-out di-plomacy iv th’ papal coort. Whin last heerd fr’m, this astoot an’ able man. backed up be th’ advice lv Elihoo Root lv York state, was makin* his way tow’rd Ma nila on foot an’ siv’ral mlmbers in th’ colledge iv cardinals was heerd to re gret that American statesmen were so thin they cudden’t find annything to fit thlm In his thrunk. "Cholera is ragin’ In th’ Ph'lippeens vice Gin’ral Jake Smith, raymoved. ‘‘Th’ stock market is boomin’ an’ bus iness has become so dull elsewhere that some iv th’ best known outside operators ar-re obliged to increase th’ depth iv th’ goold coatin’ on th’ brick to nearly an inch. ‘‘Th’ capital iv th' nation has ray moved to Eyesther Bay, a city on th’ north shore iv Long Island, with a yjpopylation lv three mlllyion clams. BY REV. SAM P. JONES. wide and 7 miles long, is full of boats and pleasure seekers in summertime. Fish abound in the Wisconsin lakes. A lady speaking to her friend of Wis consin lakes said that “Wisconsin had more lakes than any right young state in the union,” and I believe she stated a fact. The people up In this section seem • cheerful In spite of the unsea sonable weather and the ravages of the storms on their crop*. Wife sug gests she better go farther south—she might get frost-bitten up here. I tell you, the transmission Is immense from the 99 degrees of droughtburn Geor gia to the 58 and 60 degrees of this damp, cloudy, windy section. We are thoroughly cooled ano chilled as we sit In our rooms with wrapS'on and wish for a little Georgia sunshine. Wife was absolutely overcome by the intense heat of Georgia and now she. is thoroughly outdone by the cool dampness or the damp coolness of Wisconsin. How hard it is to please us mortals. In all places I meet persons whom I've known before somewhere. I never want to commit a crime, 1 for there would be no escape for me; they would catch me the first day, or the first crowd I got into. I go from here to a great camp meeting in the Shen andoah valley, Virginia, and will re turn from there to Ohio last of the week, thence into Illinois. I am on the platform of twelve of the Illinois chautauquas this year. They have sixteen full grown chautauquas in the state of Illinois. There is no more pleasant work to me than that offered by the chautauquas of this great coun try. The crowds are great and the op portunity for saying your say and driv ing the truth home is better here than in any other line of my work. The Wisconsin state convention ad journed and left Madison the day be fore we reached here. Glad they were through and gone. I don't expect to mix with delegates to state and nation al conventions in the next world, and I don’t care to make their acquaint ance in this world. The hotel# and sa- • BY WILLIAM HURD HILLYER. an' a number tv mosquitos with piano la attachments an’ steel rams. There day be day th’ head tv th' nation, thransacts th* nation's business as fol lows: 4 A. M., a plunge isto th’ salt, salt sea an’ a swim iv twinty miles; 5 A. M., horse-back ride, th’ pristdint in sthructln’ his two sons, aged two an’ four rayspictively to jump th’ first Methodist church without knockin’ off th’ shingles; 6 A. M., wrestles with , a thralned grizzly, bear; slven A. M., breakfast; eight A. M., Indyan clubs; nine A. M., boxes with Sharkey; tin A. M., bates th’ tlnnis champeen; illven A. M., raycetves a band iv rough riders an’ person’lly supervises th’ sindin’ iv lu ambylance to look afther th' in jured in th’ village; noon, dinner with i-.iarkey, Oscar Featherstone, th’ champeen roller skaMr iv Harvard '96. Fro-flssor JdcGlue, th’ archyologist, Do rd Dum de Dum, Mike Kehoo, Im manuel Kant Gumbo, th’ naygro pote. Horrible Hank th’ bad lands scout. Sinltor Lodge. Lucy Emerson Tick, tn’ writer on female sufferage, Mud-ln-th'- Eye, th’ chief iv th’ Ogullas, Gin’ral Powell Clayton, th’ Mexican mine ex pert, four rough riders with their spurs on, th' Ambassadure iv Franve an’ th’ Cinquovasti fam’ly, jugglers. Th’ con versation we lam fr’m wan iv th’ guests who’s our spoortin’ iditor, was jined In $e th’ prtsidint an' dealt with art, boxin', lithrachoor. horse-breakin’,. ROOSEVELTS REQUEST TO CABINET MEMBERS Exchange. RESIDENT ROOSEVELT has "re quested" the members of his cab inet to ro .on the stump for the Republican ticket this fait The p "request” was politely worded, but it was practically an order, and the cabinet mem bers who have had any practice in public speaking are preparing to obey. Secretary Shaw will help open the cam paign in Maine and will go west with the president In September. He will spend the last week of the campaign In lowa, his own state. Secretary Moody will go through New England with the president. Secretary Root will* make some speeches when he returns from Europe, probably In New York. Attorney General Knox never made a political speech In his life, but at the suggestion of the president he will make several this fall. "I want you to tell the people what you are doing about the trusts,” the president said to him. Secretary Hay will make a speech or two and Secretary Wilson will put In most of the campaign in the west. The\>nly members of the cabinet who will not be on the stump during some part of the campaign are Secretary Hitch cock and Postmaster General Payne. Neither is a public speaker and neither will make the attempt. The president himself will make speeches in twenty states. He will talk politics, too, straight from the shoulder, including Cuban reciprocity and trusts. He is very anxious that the Republicans shall win everywhere this fall, and he has pressed the cabinet Into the cam-1 palgn with that very end in view. He will expect them to work as hard for the puccess of the party everywhere as he will. Some of the secretaries do not think very favorably of the plan, but that does not bother the president. “IT IS TO LAUGH." Lively Sunday. An old Scotswoman who al! her life had ob served'and followed the rigorous teachings of Calvanlsm she had imbibed when a girl in her native land was recently induced by some of her young relatives, whom she was visiting, to go with them to the fashionable Episcopalian church where they worshipped. The choir, the elaborate ritual, the robed minister and the vested boys were all new and strange to her. As they filed out after tho service she was asked: “Well, auntie, how did you like it?” ••Weel,” she replied, “it's verra Interestin', I must say. but what a w'y to spend the Sab bath!’’— Philadelphia Times. Thoroughfare. The automobilists ought to mobilize and con sider whether the roads belong to them or are only borrowed.—Boston Transcript. On Time. x By the time has spent the best years of his life watehing the clock, in order to be on time at work, he has to begin taking medicine by it.—Atchison Globe. Her Martyrdom. Sylvia—l’m surprised to hear Isabel married young Dashlngton after declaring that he was not good enough for her. Phyllis—Yes, but later she declared that he was too good for any other girl, so she married him out of sheer sympathy.—Chicago News. His Mistakes “Every man,” said the thoughtful theorist, "ought to keep a diary. It is only by keeping an actual record of what you have done that you are able afterwards to see the mistakes you have made and guard against a repetition of them in thp future.” "Oh. if your diary is only to record your mis takes," replied the thoroughly practical man. “what’s the matter with the turning the keep ing of it over to your wffef—Chicago Post. loons never do so well as when they have a political convention op hand, unless, perchance, the horse races have a meet In the town. I tie the blue rib bon on the race track gang when it comes to eating and drinking. Next to them the Elks, then the politicians. Thank God I am not a member of either gang. The processions move on, and some day the pilgrimage will end; and what then? is the question so few are ask ing and fewer still are able to answer. Like the old preacher who said to the crowd of preachers around him on the car, “Brethren, I’ve found out the ori gin of evil.” A poor drunken fellow looked at the preacher and said: "Mis ter, have you found any way out of it? That's what I'm Interested in." We seek to be millionaires in this world, and turn out to be paupers in the next. The wise man is looking at everything hero and weighing everything here hy the light and scales of eternity. He who is doing best for eternity is doing best for time. The wild speculative flurries in the Chicago corn and oats pits in the past few days is more hurtful to the morale and business interests of this country than all the faro banks and poker games of all the gamblers of Ameri ca. It’s all wrong in principle, and whatever is wrong in principle is ruin ous in practice. When this wave of prosperity shall end and the financial crash shall come again. Wall street and the grain pits of Chicago will lie on top of the fallen mass of ruins. We are on a financial drunk and a commercial debauch, and we will have to sober up by and by or die drunk. The sooner the crash shall come, the. less harm It will do, and come it will. Yours truly. BAM P. JONES. P. S.—How is the "cowshed” getting along in Atlanta? It seems that Samu el Spencer and Allen D. Candler have locked horns, and the special depot committee is out of a job. How many more moons will wax and wane be fore Atlanta and the traveling publia can have relief? Will Bam and Allen please get a move on themselves? R ♦ Madison. Wls., July 25. 1902. science, shootin*, pollytics, how to kill ' a mountain line, di-piomacy, lobbing; pothry, th’ pivot blow, rayform, an* th* campaign in Cubla. Whin our ray porther was dhriveu off th* premises e wan tv th* tough riders, th* head iv th* nation was t&ehin* Lord Dum da Dum an* Sicroty Hay how to do a handspring an* th* other guests was scattered about th’ lawn, boxln*, res olin', swingin’ on th* thrapese, ridln’ th’ buckin' bronco an* shootln* at th* naygro pote fr th’ dhrlnks,—in short enjyin’ an ideal day in th’ counthry. » "An* that’s all th’ news,” said Mr. Dooley. "There ye ar-re jus’ as if ye cud read. That’s all that's happened. Ain’t X a good newspaper? Not a dun line in me. Sind in ye’er small ads." "Sure, all that’s no news,” Bald Mr. Hennessy discontentedly. "Hasn’t there annything happened? Hasn’t anny wan been—been kilt?” "There ye ar-re,” said Mr. Dooley. "Be news ye mane misfortune. I sup pose near ivry wan does. What’s wan man’s news is another man’s throu bles. In these hot days, I’d like to see a pa-aper with qawthin* in it but af fectionate wives an’ loyal husbands an* prosp'rous, smilin’ people an’ money in th’ bank an’ three a day. That’s what I’m lookin’ f*r in the hot weather.” \ "Th’ newspapers have got to print whaX happens,” said Mr. Hennessy. "No,” said Mr. Dooley, '*they’ve got to print what’s dlfFrent. Whin fver they begin to put headlines on happiness, eontlnt, varchue, an* charity, I’ll Know things is goln’ as wrong with this counthry as I think they ar-re ivry naytional campaign.” GIRL WHISTLER CHARMS ALL . INA CHURCH New York World. HEN it was time for the offer tory in the Lexington Avenua Baptisffe church. One Hundred and Eleventh street and Lex- w tngton avenue, during yesterday morn ing’s services, instead of the choir, a pret ty young girl, dressed all in white, faced the congregation. Then, for the first time in the history of any church, probably, came the soft, sweet notes of a whistling solo. The whistler was Miss Louise Truax. Schumann’s classic "Traumerei” ("DBeam ing”), regarded by musicians as among the most beautiful melodies ever written, was her selection. The notes rose loud and clear and then died away in the softest pianissimo. There was just a gentle accompaniment on the organ by Miss Magdalene Worden, which added to the beautiful effect. The congregation sat enraptured, and if it had not been a house of worship there would have been enthusiastic applause. Church over, the congregation swarmed about the pretty jglrl and made her whis tle again. She responded with the "Mock ing Bird," all trills Then she had to attend again at the evening ser vices, when she whistled “The Flower Song," by Mendelssohn. Everybody was delighted, from the clergyman, the Rev. Dr. John L. Campbell, to the newest member. In all probability Miss Truax’s solos will be a regular part of the church’s musical service in the future. Miss Truax Is 19 years old. Sh£ is ex ceptionally pretty and graceful. Her dress yesterday was of stylish but simple cut— a fluffy mass of muslin, lace and ribbons. Six years ago, when living in Detroit, she discovered her gift. She began at once to cultivate it, and practiced several hours daily until she attained a register of three octaves—far more than any hu man voice can attain. • Two years ago as a girl of 17 she made her first public appearance, after a thor ough coaching by Miss, Emma Thursby and Mme. Cappiani, and William Qhap man, of the Rubinstein club. “The whistling of most persons.” said Miss Truax yesterday, “is marred, by a puffing sound. This may be completely stopped by allowing the tongue to trem ble. Let it relax and He perfectly limp. The muscles of the lips must be culti vated and kept strong and firm. The very high notes are produced by drawing in the lips and making the opening as small as possible. The lower notes are made by pursing the lips and making the wonderful effect on my lungs. My ex pansion has Increased greatly.” During the whistling one little girl sit ting beside her mother in the church lean ed over and said loud enough for those near by to hear her: "Mamma, it sounds as if it came from heaven.” PLEASANTRIES. ' “How to treat tramps” Is a question engag ing the thoughtful attention of sociologism. The piain rule may be suggested. Do not treat them to anything intoxicating.—Nash ville Banner. A corporation with a soul Wias at last been found, and it is an ice company, at that. The Hygeia Ice company of Greenport, L. L» has agreed, on request of the women at the place, not to burn soft coal on wash gay.— New York Herald.