The Cherokee advance. (Canton, Ga.) 1880-19??, August 18, 1881, Image 2
CHEROKEE ADVANCE CANTON, GEORGIA tub n mu WAT row. Tha hu* of bar hid# nl dinky brown. Her body was lean and bar nark ww altw; Cm born turnwi np and th« otter turnnd down, n* waa kaan of vtaton » .« long of limb; With n Roman now and >. abort atnmp all, And rlka Ilka tea hoof* on a boma mada pall. Many a Dark did bar body baar; •bn had bran a tergal for all Ihlnga known ; On Many a roar thr dnaky hair Would grow no mora wbara It onoa bad grown; Many a paaalooate, parting abot ■ad laft upon bat a laallng apot ■any and many a watl-almad atoa ■any a brickbat of goodly faa, And many a ondgal awlftly thrown. Had brought tba taarr to bar lortng cyan. Or bad bcunoad off from bar bony back, With a nmaa Oka tba non ad of a rtfla amok. Many a day had aha paatad In tha pound P«t halptng haraalf to bar nalgbbor’a oorn; Many a oowardly aur and bound ■ad ban traaadiad on bat arumplad born; Many a teapot and old tin pall ■ad tha farrnar boya tlrd to bar ttma-worn tell Old Daaoon Oray waa a pinna tnaa, Though aooMtlmra tamptad to ha profana, Whn may a waary mlla ba ran To drlra bar out of bla growing grain. •harp warn tha praaka aha uaad to play To gal hat ill and to gat away. •ha know whn thadaaaon want to tawn; ■ha wiaaly watched him whan ba want by; ■a aarar paaaad bar without a frown And aa aril glanea la aaeh angry aya; ■a would crack hla whip In a aurly way. And drlra along In hla “ ona-boaa ahay." Than at hit homaataad aha lorad to oall, 1Jfling hla ban with crumplad horn, Nimbly coaling blagnrdn wall, ■alplng baraalf lo hla atendlng oorn; Rating bla cabbagaa, ona by ona; Hurrying boma wbn hat work waa dona. Bla human paaatooa warn qulok to rtaa, And airI<1 log forth with a nraga ery, With fury bluing from both hla ayaa, Aa lightning# flaah In tha aummer aky, Itaddte ud redder bla fact would grow, And after tha orwatura ba would go. Orar tba gardan, round and round, ■ranking hla paar and appla traaaj Tramping hla malona Into tba ground, Orarturnlng bla htraa of boat; Laarlng him angry and badly along, Wlahlng tha aid aow'a aaak waa wrmng. Tba moaaaa grow on tba gardan wall; Tba yaara want by with their work and play i Tha boya of thaelliaga grow atrong and tell, And tha grayhaltod farmara paaaad away. Ona by ona tba rad laaraa fall. But tha highway aow outllrad them all. THE HANDSOME ARTIST. Gntme McDonald waa a young High. Under come to Florence to study the old ■aaten. He wan an athletic, whole- ■orm, handsome fellow. He painted In the palace or wiped hi* forehead on a warm day with equally email care, to all appearance, and he had brought hi* mother and two sifter* to Italy, and enp- ported them by a moat heroic economy and industry. Indeed, the more I knew McDonald, the more I bccamo conviuced that Uicre wan another man built over him. Perhaps yon hare been in Florence . |)ear aaadtr, and know by what royal liberality artists ure permitted to bring their easels into the splendid apartments of the palace and copy from the. price- leea pictures on the walls. At the timo I have my eye upon (some few years ago) McDonald was making a beginning Ot a copy of " Titian's Bella,” and near him stood the eeeel of a female artist who was copying from the glorious pic ture of "Judith and Ilolofcruee,” in the ■ante apartment. Mademoisollo Folie (•o she was called by tho elderly lady who always accompanied her) was a ■mall and vory grncofully-formcd crcnt- nre, with tho plainest faeo in which at traction could possibly reside. McDon ald was her nearest noighbor, ami they frequently looked ever each other's pic tures ; but, as they were both foreign ers in Florence (she of Polish birth, ns he understood) their conversation wns in French or Italiau. neither of which lan guages were fluently familiar to (Irame, Rad it waa limited generally to expres sions of courtesy or brief criticising of aaeh other’s labors. Am I said before, it was a 11 proof im- preusion of a celestial summer's morn ing, and the thermometer stood nt heav enly idleness. McDonald stood with his maul-stick across his knees, drinking from Titian’s picture. An artist, who had lounged in from the next room, had hung himself by the crook o! his arm over a high peg, on his oomrade's easel, and every now and then he volunteered an observation to whioh he expected no particular answer. "When I remember how little beauty I have seen in tho world,” said Ingarde (this artist), “lam inolined to believe with Saturninna that there is no resur rection of bodies, end that only the aparita of the good return into the body ot the Godhead—for what is ugliness to do in hesven?” McDonald only said: "Hm—lim 1” How will this little plain woman look 4* the streets of the New Jerusalem, for •sample? Yet she expects, aa wo all do, to be recognizable by her friends in heaven, and, of course, to have the same inredeemnbly-plain face. Does she un derstand English, by the way—for she might not be altogether pleased with my theory?” "I have spoken to her very often,” ■aid MoDonald, "and I think English is Hebrew to her; but my theory of beauty crosses at least one corner of your argument, my friend I I believe vhaA the original type of every human in all othqr miracles, if yon like, at tha name timer Ingarde laughed, aa he weal hack to his own pietme, and McDonald, after sitting a few minutes lost in reverie, turned his easel so as to get a painter's viow of hia female neighbor. He thought sho colored slightly as he fixed hia eyes upon her; bur, if ao, she apparently became very soon unconscious of his gage, aud be was goon absorbed himself in the lank to which hia friend had so mockingly challenged Mate | Excuse me, dear reader, while with two epistles I build a bridge over whioh you can cross a chasm of a month in my story.] To OiistMR McDonald—Sir: I am intrusted with a delicate commission, which J knew not how to broach to you except by simple pro|>onal. Will you forgive my abrupt levity, if I inform you, without further preface, that the Countess Xysubriem, a Polish lady at high birth and ample fortune, does you tho honor to pro|ioee tor your hand. If you are disengaged and your affections im> not irrevocably given to another, I ran rononlve no sufficient obstacle to your acceptance of tho brilliant connec tion, Thu Countses is 22, and not beau tiful, it must iD fairuosa be said; but she has high qualities both of head and heart, and is worthy any man's respect and affection. An answer is requested in the oouraa of to-morrow, addressed to " The Count Ilanswald, Minister of Hie Majesty the King of Prussia." I have the honor, **«•. «hi. Hannwald. McDonald's answer waa aa follows: To Bla BaaaUani-r, HanawaM, ate., ate You will pardon me that I have taken two days to consider the extraordinary proposition made mo in your letter. The subject, since it it to be entertained a moment, roquirea, perhaps, still further reflection—but my reply shall be definite and as prompt as I can bring myself to lie in a matter so important. My first impulse waa to return your letter, declining the honor yon would do me, and thanking the lady for the com pliment of her olioioa. My flrat reflec tion was the relief and happiness which an independence would bring to a moth er and two siatera-dopendent now on the proenrions profits of my pencil. And I first consented to ponder the matter with this view, and I now ooneent hi marry (frankly) for tliis advantage. But still I have a condition to propose. In the studies I have had the opjior- * unity to make of the happiness of im aginative men in matrimony I have ob served that their two worlds of foot and fancy were seldom under the control of one mistress. It must be a very extraor dinary woman, of conns, who, with the sweet domestic qualities needed for com mon life, possesses at the same time tho elevation and spirituality necessary for tho ideal of the poet and pain let. And I am not certain, iu any oaae, whether tl>« romance of some secret passion, fed and pursued in the imagination only, lie not the inseparable necessity of a poetic nature. For the imagination is inoapa- bie of being cluuuod, and it ia at once disenchanted and aet roaming by the very position aud certainty whioh are the charms of matrimony. Whether ex clusive devotion of all the faculties of mind and body be the fidelity elected in marriage is a question every woman should consider before makings hus band of an imaginative man. As I have not seen the Countess I can generalize on the snbjeot without offense; and she is the best jndge whether she can chain my Taney as well as my affcotions, or yield to an imaginative mistress the de votion of so predominant a quality of my nature. I can only promise her the constancy of a husband. This inevitable license ia allowed—my ideal world anti its devotions, that, ia to say, loft entirely to myself—I am ready to accept the honor of the Countess' hand. Your Excellency msy command my time and presence. With hiith consid eration, etc., Gbjkmb McDonald. Rather agitated than surprised seemed Mile. Folie when, tho next day, as she arranged her brushes upon the shell of her oasol, her handsome neighbor com menced, in the most fluent Italiau lie could command, to invite her to his wedding. Very mnch surprised was McDonald when she interrupted him in English, and begged him to use his na tive tongue, as madame, her attendant, would not then understand him. He went on dolightodly in his own honest langnugc, and explained to her hia imaginative ad miration, though he felt oompuuetioiiH, somewhat, that so unreal a sentiment should bring the visible blood to her cheek. She thanked him—drew the cloth from the upper part of her own picture and showed him an admirable portrait of his handsome features, tub- stituted for the masculine head of Ju dith, in the original from whioh she copied—and promised to be at his wed ding, and to listen sharply for her mur mured name in hia vow at the altar. He chanced to wear at the moment a ring of red cornelian, and he agreed writh >»*r that the should stand where he could see her, and at the moment of his putting the marriage ring upon his bride’s An ger that aha should put on this, aa a to ken oi having reoeived his spiritual vows of devotion. The day came, and the splendid equi page of the Countess dashed into the i square of the Santa Maria, with a veiled j bride and a cold bridegroom, and depoe- ; being could be made beautiful without in any ereential particular destroying ~ t** 0 * the visible identity." them *** ot U * e ohurob * A * i . . , 1 ^ey were followed by other ooroneted "And you think that little womans eqmpogee, and gayly-dresaed people faoe could be made beautiful ?” dismounted from each—the mother and " I know it sisters of tho bridegroom, gayly dressed " Try it, then. Here is your copy of among them, but looking pale with in’ I Titian’s ‘Bella,’ all finished but the oertitude and dread face. Make an apotheais portrait of i The veiled bride was small, but she 1 your neighbor, and, while it harmonizes moved gracefully up the aisle, and met with the bod|y ot Titian’s beauty, still her future husband at tho altar, with a leave it recognizable as the portrait, and low courtesy, and tut do a sign to the TO give in to your theories—believing priest to proceed with tho ceremony. McDonald waa color lose, but firm, and, indeed, showed but little inteauot, ex cept by aa anxious look bow mi than aaong tha arowd «f apart atom at the •idee ot tha altar. He pronounced hia vowa with a eteady voioe, but, whan tha ring waa to be put on, ha looked aronod for an instant, and than sadden!/, and to the great scandal of all present, clasped hia bride with a paaaionale ejaoa- lation to hia bosom. The cornelian ring waa on bar finger—and tha OfaaoW eae Nyschriem and Mademoiselle Folie -hla bride and hla fancy queen—were one I This curione event happened in Fkw enoe eome years since—aa all people then there wtR remember—and it was prophesied of the Countess that aha would have but a short lease of her handsome and gay husband. But time doea not any aa A mare constant hus band than MoDonald to hia plain titled wife, and one man continuously in love, does not travel and boy pictures and patronise artiste—though few, ex cept yourself, doer reader, know tho philosophy of it. jvdoud by mm bcmoolmaybb. A custom whioh is unique among the schools ot the country has been ob served, with the heat results, for twenty- five yean at the Channcey Hall School of Boston. It ia described aa follows by the Advertiser: " It ia a vote by tha boya and girla of the school tor the beat boy ia achool. No conditions an imposed, save aa they ■A implied ia tha explanation whieh ia given to acquaint the young people with the purpose ot those who established the practice. " Each pupil ia free to vote for any of the school who has been a member for any length of time, exeept since Dec. 1 last. It haa been the custom to aaleot a boy from tha oldest claaa, but it ia not oompulsory to do aa " Former asembers ot tha achool, not all cl the same claaa, bat intimate friends there, believing that a prise given on tha principles they propound would help in developing a manly spirit st the eohool, began the practice of giv ing a medal to tha boy who reoeivea tha plurality o< the votes at the eohool ss thr I test boy. " At noon the scholars wan gathered in the school-room, and, after other bust- nesa (including an explanation of the medal system at the eohool, baaed on •lisolute, not relative, merit, ao that a modal ia within the raaoh of every pupil), Mr, Ladd explained the intent of the gentleman who give tha • baat-boy med al.’ ‘ This does not mean,’ aawl he, 1 the beet olaaeioal scholar, nor tha most noted catcher or pitcher at ban hall, nor tho ablest mathematician, nor tho bast- drilled soldier, nor the moat elegant de- claimer, nor the fastest runner, nor the moot accurate Bhakapeariaa scholar, nor the (pluckiest fellow ai football. "‘You, young boya, will do well to vote for the |>eraon who seems nearest to what your father and mother want yon to ba—what you mean to be your selves when you are iu the first class; and you, young girls, will do well to vote for the boy who oomae nearest to being what your parents are trying to have your brothers baoome, "•The older scholars are tolerably familiar with aneiant and modem histo ry. Vote for that one ot you number whose character oomee nearest to the noblest man of whom yon have read.’ "All the school aat upright with mil itary precision. Their officers passed the ballots, and each pupil prepared hia own. "At the head he puts hia own name, and tha number of years he had been in the eohool; below, the name of hia choice for the prize. Each ballot counts as many units as the scholar easting it has I wen yean at the school. "After the votes were east, the achool was marshalled from the room in regular order, and the result will not be known till the next exhibition. " By long experience it ia found that the pupils select a boy who ia deemed by the teachers to be worthy of the medal, thus proving that the sense of honor is the same with boys aa with grown peo ple.” A BIX NBA YAHTT. The hostess should Bee to it that din ner is served punotoaliy, while the guest must not be late. Exact punctuality is the only politeness. Whatever fashion may sanction, or the rank of the offender seem to exotue, a want of punctuality is a transgression nearly allied to imperti nence aud ill-breeding. Flowers may be used to decorate the table; but they are a grievance when they obscure the view aoross the table. People do not like to lean round an epergne of flowers in order to see a friend or answer a salu tation. A iow, ova! trey in the center, with four thin, small glasses placed close to it and so aa to make four oor- ners, is a very good way. An excess of floral decorations is e fault. It is also a very great fault if condiments and suit able eanoee are not within eaay reach of every guest. In some houses the rStt of fine bread ia plaoed inside the napkin. I think the majority of people would prefer to feei that their napkin hod not been handled. A napkin, jnat aa it oomee from the laundry, has an atmos phere of purity about it whioh is lost by twisting it into fancy shapes, oi arrang ing it in any way whioh neoessitetee tho handling by servants. Tha soup-plates are sometimes filled before the guests enter the dining-room. Tba aim^ f Jr this ia that it allows every one to begin dinner at the same time, and thus assert perfect social equality. But I think most minds will refuse the associations such a custom brings. The guests arc not famishing, and n dinner in a private house should never in any way suggest a chan table institution. Whf.n the same man plays " high low,” does that indicate an ’ uusettlad and fluctuating market ? USE? AMAtMtrMB AmM atu re*: apt fo leak upon «dito* re that* m0 imtoMfle lure thk «Ml Fat*fflfla ****** they daetlaalo avail tomwfoafi ot odotribu- tkma whieh the otmtttalor fa convinced would make the firtam* of the journals, M tor toy kaa* ft* Bosh MMmm to ctotalareat fuuam pftg in the breast «f the woridly-’rioeamafonr. He indites a letter ot remoneiranaa to the misguided ft promptly ttffialiid. In momma a lam tends* eteotic* than pity is •roused by aneh oaadttet, Hags very often agitates the boiom at the rejected poet. Smarting ,««ftC • eenae of gross ill-usage, he pours not the vials of his wrath upon that teraraetton at trend, injustice and wiofcednaei, the editor FHiy should hft poegu be rejected, when nmnoh treah ia inserted ? Why U no raeeonfog rejeettan vouchsafed to him? He hysterically daman da satisfaction. Tha amount of this aortal correspond ence that goes on ft surprising and die- ♦waring. It ft diatreaaiag because it ■hows aueh a lamentable want of tact on the part of the contributors, Mo editor ean reasonably beexpected to reoansider hia decision. If he mare to do so, every teretion here and m addition than; and it would be neoaamiy to have six edi tors instead of ona to examine the con tributions In thafi anoeaaaive stages of development Bear aneh an eoooomleal system would weak we leave the reader to imagine. Naturally this badgering of editors never leads to "buainaaa.” If an editor decline# a proffitred contribu tion boeansa it la Mweitable for hk mag- aaina, it ia not likely that he will be bullied into taking H; and every attempt to do ao will be wanted and remem bered. The bod teat# ao well as bad policy of amateata who adopt rack a oouraa of action cannot bo too strongly censured. If they really believe that their article, or form, or whatever it may be, ia worth publishing, let them ■end it the round of the periodical press from the Nineteenth Century downward, and U it fail to find a haven of rest from iu wandering* semewhere, its proper place ia in the fire It ought to be boras in mind that, although the reeding pub- lie devours on ftamanaa amount of rub bish, and pays for it too, it will not a wal low the literary garbage produced by ail who oiiooee to aeribble on paper with a pan. Than ia n vast dffibienoe between well-written nouatnae and the clumsily- hashed encyclopedia or overstrained sentiment of beginners.—Tinsley's Mag JOVBXALIMM OHB KVXDBBD AMD WIYYY TBABM ABO. The Hamburger Corresponden 4 -aac ot the largest and most widely eiroiHated pennon newspsaffp. not long ago cele brated iU 1 60th Jhini veraary. The pro prietors publistyfLon this occasion p memorial number of 200 pages, giving literal reprinU of same of the most inter esting numbers. The accession of Frederick the Great, the principal evonU of hia was against the united powers of Europe, ore recounted. Tha revolution by whioh Catharine earn# to the throne, wading through pools of blood, including that of her husband, is given with oemfoal reserve. The num ber of Feb. 5, 1793, contains a moat l>athetio acoonnt of the execution of Louis XVL, whieh ends with the pleas ant news that "exchange on Hamburg ia 72 and steady.” When Napoleon ruled over Germany, the old reapeeteble journal, then already nearly 80 years old, lieoame Journal Official du Depart- utctU des BouoKmm do FElbe, Under this regime the number of the 16th ot November, 1818, contains the official eooount of the battle of Iwiyxic, twenty- nine days after the event, Tho official account says that Napoleon had wen the battle, but retired to Erfurt for 11 etrate- getioal reasons.” Among the contribu tions to the feuilleton are Schiller, Lea sing and Herr Goethe, "who ia the well eduoated and talented eon of the high-born, most reapeeteble, moot wor thy Herr Senator Goethe, of the free city of Frankfort,” Heine waa a frequent contributor. kb war Aram wbitixo rs. maba- MIXB WOMB. The chief duty of moat newspaper men ia to burrow around for news, not to form smooth sentences or enunciaU beautiful thoughts. Many persons can be brilliant two or three times a year, who utterly fail in the treadmill experi ence of journalistic work. "Literary con tributors to newspapers or periodicals seldom become millionaires. Of course, one wbv ia already famous can get his own prioe for an artiole, but gfi a page is a good average compensation for an article accepted by one of our magazines. Suppose it to cover ten pages, tba writer receives 860. If he could write end se cure a publisher for twelve such articles in a year, which is supposing what rarely occurs, his net inoome would be #600. Thus, while it may pay the young be ginner in law or medicine to employ his own abundant leisure and increase bis limited income by writing for the month lies, a complete relianoe on them for support, even under favorable circum stances, is foolish. Aa for tha daily pa pers, they have little room, under the constantly -inareoaing amount of tele graphic and loeal news, for the miscel laneous topics, in whieh alone the out sider can hope to compete with the reg ular staff. Thus they offer very little to the amateur.—CituinnaH Qawrite. Thbi stood at tha door preparatory to saying good-night " When shall I call agnin ?” he naked, with an emotion t) ud made hia eyes misty and hia voioe soft “ When papa returns,” she answered calmly. " And when will that be ?” he eagerly added. "Well, ho starts for a voyage around the world to-morrow, and I'll let you know when he geta Dock.*' far jrftatfr-ctomrmr. A ample rf olff aolll etoangteootf ia Mtohipefa ao well oa in tkttf bsi aoootmtt- ware on a bowooar aday# two ahutt, ttoft'n mm mm taping aboard apparently aofferihg ffoffi rheu matism. One of tho solid man re marked, ‘Tvs never hod a twinge of fhacmatbm in my Ufa,” and a! the same time ho text from hft ponft pocket a hone-chestnut, and displayed it with on air that reamed to imply, "This ia the little jdkef that did tha business." But fto sooner had arfiid eittaan Mm 1 dis played hia chestnut charm with a con tented air, than solid citiaen Mo. 2 also draw from hft pantaloons poeket a horae- eheatnui Said the flrat citiaen, "I've retried that for thirty yeers." "So havr I carried this tot more than thirty years,”replied the other] btft I don't carry mine for rheumatism. 1 carry it for gonh M A passenger, who had bahk tm inter ested listener to the foregoing, rather timidly asked one if he really believed there waa any virtue in a simple horse- chestnut. "Mo,” answered the man. "Then why do yon carry the thing about with yon?" " Because it don't coat anything) and ana do no harm, if it does no food.” "It shows a little su perstition, though.” " Very Well j I'll shoulder il Ia tho meantime I shall keep on carrying il Fva carried it thirty years, and have not boon troubled with rheumatism. And t know ef others who eon testify to tho aama result. ” Than tho lame man who had got Aboard of tho oar and waa the eaase of this episode pat hie bond in hie poeket and drew out a htires chestnut, and held M ap to the gw of the other*. A ripple of laughter went up, and the two ■olid oitiaena who pinned their faith to tha nut anticipated a set-back from the lame man. Bat the latter remarked, " Don’t laugh, gentleman; I have faith in tha hares ehaatnut. My lameness ia not rhenaaatftre. I got a sprain a few days ago. I had t touch of the rheu matism, though, about ten year* ago, and I went and got a hone-chestnut, and hove carried it ia my poeket ever since. And, gentlemen, I’ve never had the rheumatism since." Perhaps three men oarrying horse- chestnuts ia a rather big average far a one-hone carload of passengers, but there ere mere masculines with these chestnut oharma in their pookets than Dr. Tanner, in hia philosophy, "ever dawwmwA cl."—Hartford Times. TUB YBOJAM WAB. It waa at the auniage festivities of Palana and Bhetft, parent* of Achillea, that Eria, the goddess of Discord, waa not invited; to avenge herself, ahe threw into the assembly a golden apple in scribed, "To the Fairest.” ^Juno, Mi- | nerve and Venus each claimed the apple. | After seme discussion on the subject, I Jupiter referred the decision to Paris, sen of Priam, King of Troy. Paris de- , sided in favor of Venus, who in return for this honor promised him the most beautiful woman in the world aa hia After this Paris began to travel, and among other places he visited the court of Menelaua, King of Bparta. Here ; Venus inspired within Paris a passion j for Helen, who was Menelana’ wife; this passion waa reciprocated, and the result waa that while her husband waa absent in Crete, and her brothers, the Dioscuri, I were engaged in aogne petty quarrel, ahe fled with her lover to Troy. When Men- elaus returned home he was wroth, and demanded the surrender of hia wife. This waa refused by Paris, who already had considerable trouble in getting Helen. The Spartans roused all Greece to war; this waa not a difficult thing to do, aa Helen had many suitors. For the first nine years of war very little ooeurred save a hand-to-hand con flict between Aohillee and Paris' young est brother, in whioh the brother wm •lain. It wm after this that Achilles (the bravest of the Greeks) was elain. Thera now arose n contest between Ajax and Odysseus ss to who should have Achilles’ anna They finally decided that Odyeaeus should ; this had such an effect upon Ajax that he became insane and put an end to hia own life. Tim Greeks had now long besieged the city of Troy, and the war was becoming tiresome to both Trojan and Greek ; but Odysseus had hit oa a stratagem by whioh to put a check on the war. Knowing how fond the Trojans were of show, lie had an enormous horse built, and in the liody of it were placed 100 Grecian soldiers ; this they dragged be fore the gates of Troy and there left it; the fleet, too, sailed out of the harbor. "Mow, indeed,” thought the Trojan, “ the siege is at an end. ” And, exulting in this, they brought the horse into the city as if he, too, might enjoy their tri umph. In the stillness of the night the fleet returned. The roldiers came down from the horse and unbarred the city gates. The Greeks rushed in and then followed oonfusion. Tho n an were put to death and the women and children held m slaves. Meanwhile, Paris had died and Helen was married to hia brother. He wae slain with tho rest of the Trojans, and Menelaus then took hia devoted wife home to Sparta, where they arrived after a tempestuous voyage. It is to be hoped that, after *11 this trouble, Menelaus and Helen led tho happiest live* in the world, A curtain editor of a weekly paper made a praotioo of "stopping' the press to announce,” if he had nothing of more importance to anno or oe than a dog fight. One week everything wm m dull m • Patent Office report, but the ruling pooeion cropped oat as follows : " Wa stop the press to announoa that nothing hM happened since we went to press of sufficient interest to induce us to siop the press to ausomtee it.” wmtt mi rrnYt Why do women with rod or ytfflewish hair wear "dead” fold, rad grams that remind tho beholder of badly cooked j vegetntdfoV Why do fade-f seed, brown- haired women wear the deop Md and | ofaflge hues whieh ean "go" only with 1 the olive and pomegranate tinte, and the blue-black hair of the Bottth 7 Who ia accountable for the terre-ootia garments ! in whieh aoaao otherwise harmless maid- efle pervade fashionable crowd*, inapir- | ing tha observer with wonder, totally un- mfoad with aimtialtwT . rlmlrr firle arrayed in whapeieM clothes, made ap parently of alloee of tho wall of to now Natural Hiotory Museum at South iMdljlio | strong-minded young women ill aggressive cloaks, so un speakably hideous that mu sigh for tho ulster of loot season, whieh Wo then be lieved Could not tm surpassed in odioua- neaa ; awful thiiiga mada at sage-green tweed with bine frills, or gosling woolen stuff tipped with pink I The eel-akin style hgs beeh ttleeeeded by bag, and, though the latter ia moM decant, it ia not much Ism ugly. A woman with high, narrow shoulders, and thin, long arms, might do bettor than army herself in a black satin bog, with a running string at the neck and at the waiet a " piping” (such, we were assured by a sympathetic friend of the offenders’ own sol, ft the correct term by Which to describe this contrivance), from which the skirt hangs ahapeleaaly to within an inoh of tha ankles; and aha might crown tha edifloe more becomingly than with a bonnet—or wm it a hat ?—like nothing in nature except a crumpled cabbage. The "ooeey," as an adjunct to the toe-table, ia of dubious elegance, m Well oa unquestionably fatal to drink able tea; but when adopted as • cap* to the shoulders of blooming girlhood, forming a straight line acrees the mid dle of the beck and cutting its sleeves in two just above the elbow, it is the very most unsightly piece of dress that ean be put on, especially if it ia of a sickly color. Salmon pink satin, lining a big bonnet of crinky crinoline, looking like half a dozen sheila joined at the edges, would be trying to the boot complexions; it wm eoneoling to bm it applied only to the wont. Why should n very pretty lady wear a flat gown of 0 peculiarly re pulsive green in color, but of rich velvet in material, and over It n hideous oaaalet cloak el another, end if possible more repulsive, green, with n hunch of yel lowish ribbon at tha beck and a plush bonnet like the viaor of a knight’* hai rnet? Why should writing people, painting people, singing people, persona presumably intelligent, ainoothey all do something that pleases the public and ia paid for in money, array thcmaolvm in garments, of price indeed shsbbinesa is not the note of tho popular affectation —but which render them distressingly conspicuous? These questions oannot fail to ooour to men observing the hu mors of a select crowd, and especially m the dreM of “ the conflicting gender ” tends more and more to simplicity. Of course there will always be affected mala idiots, long haired and short haired, with neektiao that make nature and hate that make ua wink by their brill iancy ; but these are tha mere " brats " of society; they are too insignificant to be offensive.—TKm Spectator. a rmw mixTM on uonxo. Move all thebrio-a-hracand parlor or naments first. It ia important that they should be displayed with elegance on the load. The truckman should have tho most msthetie taste. Never mind beating the carpets, beat the landlord you are leaving. Remember he refused to put 82 gilt paper on tho hall bedroom, and dunned you for rent in the presence of your wife's father. The coal hod should lie carried tender ly. Fill it with coal and lot tho eldest lx.'V tug it along. It will learn him a lesson of petienoe and develop his bi ce jw. The crockery you will carefully pack iu a woHhtub, of course. This is one of tho time-honored laws of moving that would be an ill omen to break—especial ly the crockery. Pack your tin-ware and mirrors on the same load; you will thus cast more re flection on ttio neighbors you are leaving than you oould by six weeks' well-meant gossip. Leave e dilapidated water pail, a roll o! ragged carpet, a half bushel of old paper, a tin nurse-lamp aud a pot of soap-grease behind you. They will serve as a nucleus for the next tenant — New Haven Register VTTBMAMCBt or MOXBD MBM. "It looks like vain.”—Plato. "Peas the butter.”—Horace Greeley. "Oold day, ain’t it V —Martin Lu ther. “ To* oen stop my paper. ^ '—Napoleon Bonaparte. "My head soIms fit to split.”—George Washington. " Is this hot enough for you ?"—■ C'or- dinal Richelieu, " Here’s another button off this shirt” —Daniel Webster. "Bend me np two pounds of steak.”— Thomas Jefferson. " These potetom ain’t more’a hal* done. "—Socrates. “You’re fuller than you woe. befor dinner.Confucius. "Gall around next week and I’ll pay ft.”- -Edgar Allan Doe. “ Can’t you keep your oold feet out of my back?”—Brigham Young. “You needn’t ait up for me; I shan’t be home till latei"— Thomas a-KempU, “ Can’t you lend me 86 till next Mon day Y'—John Howard Payne. "I suppose I’ve got to go out and ■hovel off that sidewalk.”—Charles Manner. Exofssivu discretion is the twin sis ter of cowardice, but a little discretion is often better than much valor. PLMASAirrMZMM. Jam calls hft wife’s hair-dxcm switch-tender. A KATonuM atory—One in there are no waddings. Tuna ft a chap who calls hia beat gill Revenge, because "revenge ia ■weak” Pwar girla are sold to bo fo(p| onl of fashion. If this ia true, tho plumper " Mt DafBng’a flhoea” ia thannMod a new ballad, bat " to old manli toft* ia generally considered mere touching. Tm a waa aM* a girl la ftetelh Who haff sa eatntea te Sratk, ■ha teM lalAa tea he< a sera teste Gamaon who are continually in* veighing against fashion warship should rations bar that it makaa a heap ai diffsr- anoe whom drees ia gored. ' Wm a hen etta on aa empty china egg, you oall it blind instinct. What do you oall il when a girl acts her affeotione on an empty-headed noodle? A omvAnaooa unhangs thinks whan a man marries a widow ho should give up smoking. "She gives up her weeds” —he should bo equally polite. *Tn Boston Daily Adwerttecr hand* an article in its eotamM, "Tho Graeco of To-day.” If this ft intended for • conundrum we would answer—Oiactuar- garine. "Bn wm 0 dafty,"but aha pul hm little Freneh-heotyd shoe on a banana peel, and in a flash WM transformed into a lady slipper, and than am Washing like a peony. Aa atehMtoaa girl te Dateqaa Vail la lora wMh a Sam farUga Betel Waa all ana) “ altaatef hate ate Mates Bte a ill OI BuiaS "Do too play the piano?” "No, I don’t play tha piano, but my sister Han nah, who ft in Havannah, ahe plays tho piano in the meet charming mannah." "Haveebenana?” A tocno lady wm caressing a pretty spaniel and murmuring, "I do love n nice dog I” “Ah!” sighed a dandy, ■tending near, " J would I ware a dog." » Never mind,” retorted tho young lady, sharply, "you’ll grow.” Tna Boston Olobe remarks that love ia an affection ot the at nmaah. In tha interest ot amatory poetry, wo really hope not Just imagine a lover warb ling beneath the lettioe of her he loves, "My stomach, my etomoeh ft breaking for the love of Alice Gray.” "Mt wife,” remarked a prominent manufacturer, "never attends auctions. Bhe went once, jnat before we were mar ried, and, seeing a friend on the opposite aide, nodded politely, whereupon tho auctioneer knocked down a patent cradle, and asked her where ahe wanted it delivered. ” “ Is n true that you are going to mar ry again?” "It’s very true.” "And whom do you marry?” “My dead wife’s Bister.” "Ia ahe handsome?’> "No.” » Rich ? ” “ Not at all.” " Then why have you choaen her?” "To tell you the truth, dear friend, in order not to change mother-in-law.” ALLIBATOB UtATMBB. It ia now twenty-one yearn since the* an old Canadian revealed to tho head of a large ehoe-m*nafactaring firm in Bos ton the secret of a process for the tan ning of alligator hides. The industry immediately became a profitable one, and since then many thousand alligator hides are annually naed by our homo manufacturers or sent abroad, princi pally to London and Hamburg. At first the skins came from Louisiana, and New Orleans was the center of the traf fic. The wholesale manner in whioh tlxe alligator* were slaughtered, how ever, speedily rendered them scarce ia that State. Florida ft now the great source from whioh our supplies are ob tained, and the trade center* In Jackson ville. The alligators ore killed in great numbers, liotli by passenger* on board the steamboats plying on the rivers of Florida and by hunter* who follow tiaft pursuit as a means of livelihood. After being killed they are flayed, and only those parts which are useful for leather, such as the belly aud flanks, are pre served. They are then packed in o cask containing a strong brine and Mnt North to be made into leather. Hither to alligator leather has been used chiefly for men’s boots and shoes ; now, how ever, it is ooming into fashion for ladies’ wear. It ft also made into slippers, pocket-books, cigar-cases and various other kinds of fanoy articles. The traf fic in this leather, whioh has hitherto been of importance only in this coun try, ft now making rapid strides in Eu rope, and at a not far distant day will probably resell no inconsiderable pro- portions. — French paper. ANOTBICB HVBMTITOTB YOB CAB1 OIL. A writer mentions black alder ai substitute for castor oil. He root mends a fluid extract made from bark, each fluid dram of whioh oonte an equivalent of one dram of the b* The extract ft a dark brown thick fit; with a sweet and agreeable taste, i the dose varies from one to two dr« for a ohild. As an aperient it has mi advantages over Rhamnus cathartic it causes no nausea, no eructations, i no griping, and also seems to have to and aromatic qualities by whieh muscular action of the bowels is eligh stimulated. Tn« will yet read to the living an u published story of the dead. Tixue mi explain silences whioh shall make etroi men weep. Time may teach o hands to be quiet or our roioM to 1 tender and low. Time may lead np o of the valley of humiliation a troop penitents to weep at ■