Newspaper Page Text
r&ioe.
joint o pax*.
’T?* * cnvi« up In;t —• ».*sr was known—
Bat often iu human nature shown,
a vlifc* n .-astlc and cottng.—
I'll it pride like pig* »*f a certain brood.
Will manage to live and thrive on food
A* poor ah a pauper’s pottage !
Os all the notable things on earth.
The queerest thing is the pride of birth
Among onr “fierce Democracy l”
A bridge across a hundred years,
Without a prop to save it from sneers—
Not even a couple of rotten piers—
A thing of laughter. ftingH and jeers—
b American Aristocracy.
Depend upon it, my snobbish friend,
Yoor family thread you cannot ascend,
Without good reason to apprehend
Yon may find it waxed at the other end
By some plebhin vocation;
Or,, worse than that, your boasted line
* May end in h loop of stronger twine.
That plagued tome worthy relation.
Because you flourish in worldly affairs,
!*»»»•♦ i*. haughty and pnt on airs,
With insolent pride of station,
Don’t he proud and turn up your nose
At jioorer people in plainer clothes;
Bat learn for the sake of the mind's repose,
That all proud flesh—wherer it goes—
b subject to irritation.
Fo»d for Smiles.
was Noah never hungry 1 Because
Be had Ham with him.
J>iggery aaya he respects old age, except
when some oue cheats him with a pair o
old chickens.
A friend. Why are yonng ladies' brains
like a speckled trout? Because they love to
sport under a water-fall.
Ail old lady hearing of a pedestrian's
••great feat” wondered why they didn’t in
terfere with his last walking.
A negro after gassing at the Chinese, ex
claimed, “If de white folks is as dark as dat
out dar, I wonder what’s de color ob de
niggers.”
Why shonld a chimney-sweeper be a
good whist player? Because he is always
following soot.
The Pacific Railroad Company advertise
for sleepers. They should apply to some of
the popular churches.
Mrs. Muffles says it is “dredful” hard to
hme a husband. She never got used to it
until she lost her fonrth.
••Tnis is capita? ale!” sad an old toper;
‘are hew long it keep its head.” “Ay,\
• ti<.(a bystander; ‘but consid r 1 ow soon it
akes away yours!”
Much libellous matter has been written on
tombstones about wives. Witness this
from Selby, m Yorkshire: —
Here lies my wife, a sod and slattern Bhrew;
If I said I ugretted her, I should lie too.
An Irish girl told her forbidin lover that
•be longing to possess his portrait and
intended to obtain it. Bn! Ik w if yonr
fnends see it!* “Ah. but I'll tell the artist
not to make it like you, so thy won't know it.*
A moon-atrsck poet got - ff the following;
iliapandy skating:: “0? the girls, the
tieantiftil girt, with tire liquid eyes and the
golden curls, skating along o’er the crowd
ed rinks, as sweet as a pea, as cute as a
pink."
A gellman, giving a lecture to some
was explaining how no one could live with
nut air. He then said - “You have all heard
nf a man drowning how does that happen 7 *
The ready answer was, “'Onus she can’i
•win/
A ntrager in Boston, desring to be shown
the wa> to the South Boston, accosted an
irishman,, who at once replid,. “Take Harri
son Avenew along wid ye, mind that ! turn
Sontli Boston bridge over, do ye mind that j
j«*re just there, now !’ r
Two rival* belhss met ast a hop. ‘‘How
well yon look under candlelight ! ’ exclaim
•done, wilh a atresson the candles. “And
hew charming you are iu the dark P an-
Bwe red the other.
The following is from a local paper: “per
tons wishing to see the editors will gener
ally find them at printing-office. In their
absence, however, invtanions- to dine, and
•hailengw to fight, should be left either with
tßwpah!isher r in oof t»Me- drwaer."
ITncte- *Tdare say when T talte you home
again,. Gharlie, your mamma will- have a
nice present foryon. What would you like
•beat, my boy—a little brother or a little sis
ter?“ Charlie (after some consideration)
••Well, it it makes no diflernce to ma, I’d
at her have a little pony.”
A letter bearingtbe followingsnperscrip
ion- was recently received-at the Silver City
poat office, from lowa.* ;
“Augustus Jones, a Webfoot 6crnb,
To whom this letter wauls to go,-
Is chopping cord wood for bis grub,-
in Silver City, Idaho.’’
“Sammy, Sammy,- my son, don’t stand
there scratching yonr head; stir your stumps
or you will make no progress in life.”
••Why father, reblied the yonng Hopeful.
•*l‘rw often heard you say that the only way
to get along in this world was to scratch
aheadr
A ob>ck having jnsl struck the hour of
ono, a tender-hearted women exclaimed: ‘ 0
what a cruel clock!” “why so f’ asked a
friend. “Because it struck its little one!’
answered the tender hearted mother.
awim.”
A newspaper ill Cleveland having adve
tised that they wonln smut a copy of their
paper gratis for one year to theiperson sem •
ir.g them a ‘ club of ten,” received the ten
spot of clubs from a young lady in the coun**
try.
A Paris prper gives a conversation be
tween a father and his little daughter.*
“What have yon done with your doll?*
“I have put it away to keep for my chil
dren when I grow up.
“But if you shouldn't have any?”
“All 1 well! then it will do for my grand
children
A youngster, on being admonished by
Lis mother not to take all the hash from the
dish, becaus he should leave some for man
ners, replied, overlooking around the table,
“Well, 1 never saw any Manners here to
eat hash. Manners never comes to our
house!”
Pan Bryant, the” minstrel,” tells of the
most complex family ever known, something
in this wise: ”1 married a young widow,
who lived with her stepdaughter: my
father shortly after married the step
daughter. My wife was therefore the
mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law of
my father. I am the step-father of my
mother-in-law, and my wife’s step-daughter
is my step-mother. Well, my step-mother
—that is to say, my father’s wife, and my
wife’s daughter—bad a sou. He is roy step
brother, of course, but being the son of
my wife’s step-daughter, my wife is, of
course, his grandmother, and I am his
grandfather as well as his step-brother.
My wife also had a boy. My step-rootber
js consequently step-sister of my boy aud
also hi» grandmother, because be is
child of her stepson, and my father is the*
brother in law of my son, who is the son of
my stepmother lam my mother’s brother
in law, my wife is the aunt of her own son,
my son is the grandson of my father, and
I am my own grandfather^
A recipe for cooking beans, which
have not tried, but would infer, taking into
consideration the law of possibilities, was
worthy of a trial Buy a bean, bathe it well
putin twelve quarts of stenched river wa
ter (if you haven’t got a river, better buy
one, as they are handy to have), bile it six
hours by an avoirdupoise clock take it out
and wipe it thoroughly dry with a soft
towel—an old shirt won’t answer—lay it
on its north cast side, about two degrees
sow westerly; bore n hole i» eaeh end,
abstract the” innards” very quietly, with
out mussing very much; then stuff oue end
with soft biled rice, and the other end with
rice biled soft; the end that pints toward
the north should, in all instances, except in
cases of extreme hemorrhage, be stuffed
first; then take the south side of the shell
off gently; then the east carefully, so the
eastern people won’t know it, then sweeten
with salt, audit will taste so much like rice
you’d never dream it was a bean.
A Washington dispatch says Genorel
Grant has prepared his resignation as Gen
eral oi the Army, and will tender it fc»
President week, cm the day
after the e-lecioral vote for President is
counted and declared by Congress,
THE SAVANNAH
fgjtemtif flew
DAILY AND TRI-WEEKLY,
A RELIABLE
Family & Commencail Newspaper,
CONTAINING THE
LATEST NEWS BY TELEGRAPH & MAIL
FROM ALL PARTS OF THE WORLD
A Daily Telegraphic Report of all Foreign and
Domestic Markets, together with a full Daily Report
of the Savanuah Cotton, Grocery, and Produce
Market
Every Friday we publish a full Financial and
Conimenial Report of the Savannah, Market con
taining Prices Current, Comparative Statement of
Cotton, and full 1 Meieantile Statistics, carefully
compiled under and by dircctiou of the Board of
Trade of this city.
In the future, as in the past, the News and Hbral#*
will pursue the same straight-forward, earnest,
honest' policy. It will oppose Radical despotism,-
which is now blighting this country, in ail its
changes and under whatever device it may appear,
it will oppose Fanaticism and all the monstrosities,
humbugs, and delusions that grow out of it, the
stupid and barbarous polices aud usurpations of the
State Government by negroes and Northern adven
turers. Ae heretofore, ir will give unceasing. atten
tion to State Internal Improvements, the subjects of*
Education, Manufactures, and Immigration. Nor
will the News and Herald be the organ- of aßy
clique, the sla-ve of- any money power-, the champion
of anv corrupt oorporatiom It will have no senvioes
to sell, no favors to ask, no passions or prejudices
to lead it astray—unless loving and defending Con
stitutional Rights be a passion, and hating the
enemies of-liberty, peace, and fraternity be a preju
dice.
Connected with the paper are Colonel W. T.
Thompson, late editor of the “Morning News,” and
well-known as the anther of “Major Jones' Court
hip,” and Dr. J. S. Jones, formerly of the “Tal
lahassee Floridian.”
TERMS:
Patty, a year $lO
Tri- Weekly (Monday, Wednesday, and
Friday), a year $6
Subscriptions received for any length of time
from one month upward ; and if you want a Savan
nah paper, send one dollar and try the New6 and
Herald for a mouth.
Specimen copies can be procured from ouragents.
Connected with the office is a'
BOOK, JOB. & CARD PRINTING OFFICE.
AH orders, by mail ortherwise, promptly attended
tO:
All communications, to receive prompt attention,
must be addressed 1 to
J. H. ESTIL£ r
Editor and Proprietor.
11l Bay Street, Savannah, Ga.
Postmasters everywhere are authorised td’
receive snbscri prions.
March 18, 1868. 41 -tfi
1869. 1860.
f
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mm ffvs. ' m i O
I I . mitt jjr iml |
<* ['jjj fo]**Bl*'l« 1 NSI
.. i ■ifil-ii mnrßff y i 'lißnir i vv " -
D-5 mummmL ts'BPh
b'" dail
strnc- to the kbm
i t!u' panee.ot _ 'leaf Congress, no £dm
.teriai! (,n !' •* (JWm ~m
; m s ? r, ‘ tfcn ’ 8
J K'srf Mprdihary com
•rite between
And -i “ ; ' f "riBffIBBCJ
\ a»h r p
V* V.T Court of Ordinary at. '«B
1 D >oly -Lo.elt. bos nppliechMl'r
ft setting apart and vatiu£|.j§
JOB I*
f re/’J_3?el»gihility ofuegreßbJ
V p - Jr * irtiA
As can be Done Any Mr. offered an amendment t
* SjbuVtF “ish branches of the j
to abip
WITH THE SAME FACILITIES AT HAND.
We Use Nihotng but the
Best Article of Paper,,
m *■ ■
jp. . cfoneur w
'., s 'of the
. And" grot's to hold i io this
Wlime Cuurl, it. was adopted
finest inks, TANARUS.:
jpurnng with the
f selectio ***-“-’
V
Thus Giving at * £
A TONE AND FINISH TO 000 WORK,
Which No Other Kind of Material will Produce*-
> ‘ v
. - - - - —.— - ... ~
OUR TERMS
Are Strictly
CASH OK DBLZVBBT
And* oar Kates
As Low as those of any Establish me»
/
Io this Seofeioo of the Country.-
•
%
~ SgSgsgggSgggggg^g^gsgggggS!jgiaWlgai^"ll!gg^?!ggßg^
ORDERS soliciie®.
JOSBPQ FIN EG AN, JAS. B. PABRAMOBB,
Fetnandina, Fla. Madison, r
JOSEPH FINEGAN & CO.,
COTTON FACTORS
—and —
Commission Merahants
JONKS’ UPPER BLOCK, U\ STREET,
SA VANHaH, GEORGIA 1
ggp Liberal Advances on Cotton consigned to oui
Correspondets in New York and Liverpool.
Sept. 10, 1808. 25 ' 3M
o. dauvergne,
Cabinet Maker, Upholster and Undertaker.
Beecher’s Block, Water Si-., BAtNfeKtbGE, Ga.
third door from Corner of Broad and Water Streets.
I take^
Os** ,m . !?w" a t l
ordere for every thing pertaining to Cabinet Wotk,
tJpholstets and undertakers.- fnrniture
Matrasses made to order or repaire notice"
repaired, funemis furnished at the shoiest notice,
Everything else done or fumiehrd usual in the
line of business. 6-Bin.
, July 1808. |L'
Vr *
LMCimEsiLoom
HSPER LEWIS & GO..
‘ WATER: STREETS.
: ® ' v ' I,WAYS FIND
RPfW 1 *- a
J'HT
VMS , .-|JI
flar * WMmSm
% Boof.r> slip;
\«rrMoßßis, Jr., General Partners.
Muller, l Special Partners.
baowa, \ Ngw ¥OEK .
.t ; o:
flawtng formed a limited partnership under the
laws of the State of New York, with Messrs. Frantz
B Mullet, and Win Harman Blown, as special part
ners, un'iiW the firm name of “B. C. Morris. Jr,” I
am now continuing, with increased facilities, the
busint . ,ieretofore conducted by the late firm of
Caldwell & Morris, at the same office No 20 OLD
g£_jp_ B. C. MORRIS, Jp,.
New York, August 4,1868. Sept.-2-16-6m.
fclA.
s 9q OnipHip wiib 1
“ will he ;ff3»nded to imrftedje Hall and nex
* Feb, I.lth, 1860. Gallery.
*- , a f . "* _ _ Ji stock to be had
Vsas All \ )f) S 2o 00, s'2s 00,
\ 00 and sso 00.
liiirti - ( £QBKC ,u * c *‘ l> ~ MMll ' iim
V, inn, " , .•f* >
REMOVAL.
THE Office of the “Printers’' Circular” and
Printers’ Furnishing Warehouse formerly located
at 36 Hudson Street, has been Removed to 516
Minor Street. Address all orders for material to
R. S\ Men ami,n 515 Minor Street, Philadelphia,
Penna. [3_s_tf.
TAX NOTICE.
IWILL be at the following named places for the
purpose of making my last Assessment of State
and County 'Paxes. Every Tax payer are requested
to eome forward and give in their Taxes for the year
1868.
Jones, Friday Dec. 4th‘; Chester’s Store. Saturday
Dec. sth; Cooper’s Shop, Monday Dec. 7tft; Atta
pulgus, Tuesday Dfec. Bth; FaCevHle, Wednesday.
Dec. 9th; Lower Spring- Creek-, Thursday DeC loth:
Steam Mill, Friday Dec. fl-th; Rbek- Pbttd 1 , Saturday
Dec. 12th; Brocketfsr Mill, Monday Dec. f4tfr, Baiu’-
biidge. Tuesday Dec. 15th; Lime Sick; Wednesday
Deoi-HJth. And again in Bainbridge on December
18th and 19th-and at Harrell’s Station on thte 21st
and 22d. After which time the Books Wilt he closed
aud a-H defaulted-doubled- Taxed
T. C. BLOUWT.
Tax Assessor.
Dec. 2’ 1898. 35-3 t.
Beef and Stock for Sale.
THE Subscriber has for sale
den and Liberty CoiMitietr; FlbTida,
FPVS HUNDRED HEABo/ BEEF and ii* H
STOCK CATTLE, there can be had about ONE
HUNDRED AND FIFTY HEAD OF BEEF CATTLE
and the remainder STOCK. For farther particulars
apply to 4
t IT. G-REGOORY, QuinCY, Florida', or to'
E-. S CANDLER, Bats bridge, Georgia.
December 23’, 1868. 38-6 m
SILK and STRAW GOODS,
JUST RECEIVED a fine assortment of LadieS a'od
Childrens Straw, Felt and Plush, also. Ribbon
Trimmings, Velvet Braids, Artificial Flo. ere &,o
for sale very low by t
T. Bi HfiNNEWFXI & CO.
Hoop Skirts,
LADIES and Misses, of the latest style, just' re
ceived'and'fbr sale by
T. B; UTONE-WEIIE, & CO.
YDS., Assorted styles of Prints at a
5 V V V reduction from termer prices, ms
received and ter sale bv
T.‘B. BUNNEWeBL & CO.
Opera Flannels,
F'Crtt ladies-a«d i ChiidretiS'Shcks-, all Colors, now
»n store and for sate by
i xv a* & co*
1868.
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THE BEST PAPER IN THE WORLD.
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Agents Wanted for
TE OFFICIAL HISTORY
OF THE WAR,
Its Causes, Character, Conduct add Resultss
By HON. ALEXANDER H. STEPHENS*
A Book for all Sections and all Parties.
npIIIS great work presents the orily Complete and 1
1 impartial analysis of the Causes of the War yet
published, and gives those interior lights and shad
ows of the great conflict only knOWn to those high*
officers who watched the flood-tide of revolution 1
from its fountain springs, and which were so acces
sible to Mr. Stephens from his position as second
officer of the Confederacy.
To a public that has beCh surfeited*with apparent
ly similar pkondCTiONs, we promise a Change of fare,
both agreeable and salutary, and an intellectual
«r eat i° f the hlgheßt order - The Great American
War has at last found a historian worthy of it*
importance, and at Whose hartds it will receive that
moderate, candid- and iYhpattfht treatment which'
titith and justice Sb Urgently demand.
The intense desire every where ihanifested to ob*
tain this work, its Official character arid ready sale.-
combined with an increased commission, make it
the best subscription fioott ever published
f r aßton - s>a - reports 7- subscribers ill’
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