About The Lee County ledger. (Leesburg, Ga.) 1978-current | View Entire Issue (June 19, 2019)
Page 6B, The Lee County Ledger, Wednesday, June 19,2019 One Man’s Joke Is Another Man’s Discount From The Bible By Jerry Kingery Special to the Ledger Dr. James L Snyder The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I were dining out at a very nice restaurant. We had been on the road for two days and were weary of travel. At least, I was. Nothing I hate more on a vacation than travel. But this time it was not so bad because my wife was doing all the driving. She’s an excellent driver because she had the world’s best teacher. I admit that I was her teacher. We were seated and began looking at the menu. Then my wife said, “You don’t take very many things seri ously, do you?” We both laughed, but I knew she was right. Life is too short to be serious about every thing. I do not want to come to the last of my days and find I have 100 giggles left over. I want to giggle all the way to the end. The waitress came, graciously took our order and then brought back the bread for us to begin our lunch. I picked up the knife to cut some of the bread and I dropped it on my right forefinger. There was a little cut there and so I squeezed it to get as much blood out as I possibly could. My wife looked at me shaking her head and said, “What in the world are you doing?” At the time I had no idea what I was doing, I was just doing. Then I saw the wait ress heading for our table. Every once in a while I have a thought rattling around in my head. And so when she got to the table I said, “I cut myself and it hurts so much.” She shook her head and said, “Your finger’s okay, I saw you using it as I was coming to your table.” “But look at the blood,” I complained, “can I get a discount?” Still shak ing her head, she walked away from the table. I think my wife thought I was just going to let it go, but when you have a good thing going, why not keep it going. I was going to play this to the very end. My philosophy is when a bad thing hap pens, try to find some thing good out of it. I got my handkerchief out of my back pocket, made a little sling for my finger and attached it to my shirt. There I was with my finger in that little sling as though I had hurt it very badly. As the waitress came to our table again she stopped, looked at my finger in the sling and burst out laughing. I said in such a dreary voice, “Does this quali fy for a discount?” I sat there with my bleeding finger in the little sling and the customers around me were laughing as they watched. Their laughter was worth what I was doing. Was there any pain in my finger? Not at all. But I did have a drop of blood. That alone should count for something. My wife looked at me, shook her head and said, “I can’t take you any where.” I would not give up on my pursuit of a discount. After all, life is full of discounts if only you can find them. Believe me, I look for them. “Don’t you know people are watching you?” My wife said as quietly as possible. I snickered a smile in her direction and con tinued my “woe is me” attitude. She knew I was not taking this seriously and she knew that I was going to milk this for everything I could get. Eventually the wait ress came back with our ticket and said, “When my manager heard your story he broke down laughing. Nobody has ever tried this in this restaurant before.” I smiled; I like to hear things like that. Then she said something that really surprised me. “The manager said that I could give you a 10% discount for your pain and suffering in our restaurant.” She handed me the ticket and there it was in black-and-white. “10% discount for pain and suffering.” Several of the custom ers around me clapped and laughed at my suc cess. Nothing is more important to me than making people laugh. Too much gloom and doom in our world to day. Somebody needs to step up and turn on the laughter machine. I took a picture of that ticket to make sure I would not forget that sometimes one person’s joke can equal a good discount. As we began driving after lunch, both of us chuckled for quite a while. I said to my wife, “Who in the world would have thought that would work?” You never know what’s going to work until you try it. If it does not work, okay, move on to the next joke. People take things so seriously these days. Then there are those people who laugh at the wrong things. I need a balance in my life and I know that laughter is like medicine to the soul. It just depends what I am laughing at or who. See Joke, page 7B An altar of witness Then Joshua called the Reubenites, and the Gadites, and the half tribe of Manasseh, And said unto them, Ye have kept all that Moses the servant of the LORD commanded you, and have obeyed my voice in all that I commanded you: Ye have not left your brethren these many days unto this day, but have kept the charge of the commandment of the LORD your God. And now the LORD your God hath given rest unto your breth ren, as he promised them: therefore now return ye, and get you unto your tents, and unto the land of your possession, which Mo ses the servant of the LORD gave you on the other side Jordan. But take diligent heed to do the commandment and the law, which Mo ses the servant of the LORD charged you, to love the LORD your God, and to walk in all his ways, and to keep his commandments, and to cleave unto him, and to serve him with all your heart and with all your soul. So Joshua blessed them, and sent them away: and they went unto their tents. Now to the one half of the tribe of Manasseh Moses had given possession in Bashan: but unto the other half thereof gave Joshua among their brethren on this side Jordan westward. And when Joshua sent them away also unto their tents, then he blessed them, And he spake unto them, saying, Re turn with much riches unto your tents, and with very much cattle, with silver, and with gold, and with brass, and with iron, and with very much rai ment: divide the spoil of your enemies with your brethren. And the children of Reuben and the children of Gad and the half tribe of Manasseh returned, and departed from the children of Israel out of Shiloh, which is in the land of Canaan, to go unto the country of Gilead, to the land of their possession, whereof they were pos sessed, according to the word of the LORD by the hand of Moses. And when they came unto the borders of Jordan, that are in the land of Canaan, the children of Reuben and the children of Gad and the half tribe of Manasseh built there an altar by Jordan, a great altar to see to. And the children of Is rael heard say, Behold, the children of Reuben and the children of Gad and the half tribe of Manasseh have built an altar over against the land of Canaan, in the borders of Jordan, See Bible, page 7B James L. Snyder Attend The House of Worship of Your Choice This Sunday Lee County Church Of Christ Eddie Garcia, Minister Bible Study 9:30 AM Worship..10:30 AM & 6:00 PM Smithville Baptist Lance Fendley, Pastor Sunday School... 10:00 AM Worship...11 AM & 7 PM Philema Road Baptist Sunday School 9:45 AM Morning Worship 11:00 AM Evening Worship ..6:00 PM Alpha Baptist Tom Howard, Pastor Sunday School 9:45 AM Morning Worship 11:00 AM 1st Sunday of the Month Evening Worship ..6:00 PM Antioch Baptist Church Rev. Lem Wright 1st and 3rd Sunday Sunday School 9:00 AM 4th Sunday Worship Service. 10:00 AM Friendship Baptist Church of Lee County Mark Spraggins, Pastor Sunday School 9:45 AM Morning Service.. 11:00 AM Phillip Grove Baptist Pastor Jenkins Sunday School... 10:00 AM 1 st & 3rd Sunday 11:00 AM Mt. Pleasant Baptist Pastor E B Washington Sunday School 8:00 AM Worship Service ...,9:15AM Albany Bible Church Pastor Pete Daughtry, Sun. Bible Class...9:30 & 11:00 Christ’s Sanctified Holy Church Rev. Gary Collier Sunday School... 10:00 AM Worship Service.. 11:00AM Life Church Pastor Matthew Schluckebier Sr. Adult SS 9:30AM Sunday Service....10:45AM Westview Baptist Church Rev. Grady Morey Sunday School....9:45 AM Worship Service...11:00 AM Evening Worship...5:00 PM Kinchafoonee Baptist Rev. Melvin Slappy Sunday School 9:45 AM Morning Worship 11:00 AM Evening Worship .7:00 PM Smithville United Methodist Rev. Duane Whittaker Worship 9:30 AM Sunday School ...10:45 AM Palmyra Baptist J. D. Bolden Sunday School ...10:00 AM Morning Worship 12:00 PM Bible Study (1st Sun) .5:00 PM Eve. Wor. (1st Sun)7:00 PM McAfee Grove Missionary Baptist Minister Robert Lewis Morgan First & Third Sundays Sunday School ...10:00 AM Worship 11:00AM Second & Fourth Sundays Sunday School 8:00 AM Worship 9:00 AM Macadonia Baptist Church Sunday School ...10:30 AM First Sunday Morning Worship 11:45 AM Third Sunday Evening Worship .6:00 PM Jordan Grove Baptist Rev. Rod Hubbard Sunday School 9:45 AM Worship Service .11:00 AM The Pointe Carl Barnhardt Sunday Worship...9:00 am Children’s Ministry (Infants - 3 yr old) Sunday Worship... 10:30 am Children’s Ministry (Infants - 5th grade) Leesburg Church Of Christ Bro. Howard Bouldin Sunday School 9:30 AM Morning Worship 10:45 PM Evening Worship .5:00 PM Greater Zion Hope Apostle Henry L Hosley Every 1st, 4th, 5th Sunday Sunday School...8:00 a.m. Sunday Worship..9:00 a.m. Albany Community Seventh-day Adventist Church Pastor Steve Rose Saturdays Bible Study 9:30 AM Worship 10:40 AM Unity Church of Christianity Rev. Joanna Gabriel Morning Worship ...,11:00 AM New Hope AME Rev. E.X. King Every 1st and third Sunday Sunday School 10:00 AM Sunday Worship 11:00 AM House Of God Saints In Christ Elder A.F. Caldwell, Pastor Sunday School 10:30 AM 1st, 2nd, d< 4th Sundays Morning Worship ...,11:45AM 2nd & 4th Sunday Evening Service 6:30 PM For any corrections or additions to the Church Page, Contact The Lee County Ledger at 759-2413 The Church at the Groves Worship 9:00 AM Worship 11:00 AM Wooden Grove Baptist Joe Jones, Pastor 1st, 3rd, & 5th Sunday Sunday School ...,9:45 AM Worship 11:00 AM 2nd & 4th Sunday Sunday School 7:45 AM Worship 9:00 AM Lifegate Church Sunday Service... 10:00 AM Thundering Springs Baptist Church Sunday School 9.45 AM Morning Worship 11:00 AM Evening Worship .6:00 PM Leesburg United Methodist Church Pastor Lee Smith Worship 8:30 AM Sunday School ...,9:30 AM Worship 10:30 AM Green Grove Baptist Smithville, GA Rev. H. Waters Sunday School ..11:00 AM Every First Sunday Morning Worship 11:45 AM Kingdom Vision Christian Center Rev. Earl S. Harrison, Pastor Sunday School ...10:00 AM Sunday Worship. 11:15 AM Heritage Full Gospel Church Hickory Grove Road Sunday School 9:45 AM Sunday Service.... 10:45 AM Sunday evening.. 6:00 PM LIFE. TOGETHER. DOCO CREDIT UNION E COMMUrtl{y, YOU ALWAYS WANTED. DOCOCU.com 239 Cedric Street, Leesburg, GA For more information call 229-435-1715 □□1® f=r NCUA Colony bank Member FDIC =) Equal Housing Lender Located on Robert B. Lee Drive in Leesburg - 759-2800 2609 Ledo Rd - 430-8080 and 113 North Westover Blvd. - 229-317-2157 dfy HOMETOWN 216 Walnut Ave. US 19 N. Leesburg 759-6286 Subscribe to The Lee County Ledger Call 229-759-2413 Your Hometown Source for Local News Jflatijetosi Funeral Home Crematory/Memorials Mike Mathews - Gary Mathews 3206 Gillionville Rd. Albany, GA 31707 435-5657 Leesburg Cemetery Xmkell-SteM FUNERAL DIRECTORS Crematory and Memorials Crown Hill Cemetery 1503 Dawson Road • PO. Box 92 Albany, Georgia 31702-0092 Phone: (229) 883-4152 “Service Since 1880” Leesburg First Baptist Sunday School 9:00 AM Worship 10:15 AM Evening Worship ..6:00 PM Greater United Pleasant Green Baptist Church Rev. Andrew E. McDowell, Jr. Sunday School 9:45 AM Worship 11:15AM Sovereign Grace Baptist Church Steven Youngblood, Pastor Morning Worship.10:30 AM Evening Worship..6:00 PM Amazing Grace Baptist Church Dr. Johnny Nixon Sunday School 9:45 AM Morning Worship..10:45AM Evening Worship...6:00 PM Mt. Hope Baptist Church Services 1st Sunday Church 8:00 AM Sunday School 9:00 AM Piney Grove #3 Charles Carr, Pastor Sunday School ...10:00 AM 2nd and 4th Sunday Worship 11:00 Noon Emmanuel Community Baptist Church Al Bryant, Pastor Sunday School ..10:00 AM Morning Worship 11:00 AM Shady Grove Baptist Church Rev. Sterlie Calhoun, Pastor 1st and 2nd Sunday Worship Service. 11:00 AM Every Sunday Sunday School ..10:00 AM St. Matthew Missionary Baptist Church Rev. Dr. H. C. Wilson, Pastor Sunday School ...10:00 AM 2nd. Sun. Worship..11:00 AM 4th Sunday 7:00 PM Church Family of Prayer Ministry Pastor Norbert Ingram Sunday 11:00 Place your ad here. Call (229) 759-2413
