Newspaper Page Text
Carl Dunder Learns Something.
From tlie Detroit Free I’resr.
“Hello, Mr. Dunder, I thought you
hail hung yourself or gone lmck to
Germany,” fainted Sergt. Bcndall
ns Carl Dunder entered the W oral-
bridge street station.
“Sergeant, I vitas pooty near all
right now,” was the reply. “I un
derstands all about her much petter
as I did.”
“That's good. Anything new ?"
“Veil, not so worry mooch. I learn
to understand American a leedle more
eafery day. I vhas pooty green ven
I first come oafer here, cli ?”
“I should remark 1"
“Eaferpody makes some finds ol me
nil der time, und I vhas discouraged.
I vhas hayseeds, eh ?”
“Yes, you were.”
“Und more ash one million Hies
vhas on me ?”
“Yes.”
“Und 1 vhas so green dot cows like
to eat me oop?"
“Exactly.”
“Vhell, dot makes me laugh ven I
think about her, hut my eve teeth
vhas all cut ofi now. I vhas on to all
dcr games now.”
“I see.”
“A feller comes into my place two
days ago to make me his victim. I
spotted him so ijueek you can t wink.
He says he like to show me a new
puzzle. It vhas called, ‘Now you see
him und now doan’ see her.’ He
ilakes dcr shack of spades, der ace of
hearts, uuil der queen of clubs, und
throw ’em all around und den likes
to pet me I can’t pick out dot shack.
I pick him out fife time right ofi, und
dot feller says I vhas lightning.”
“But you didn’t hot?”
“Oh, no.”
“It was lucky you didn’t. That
puzzle, as you call it, is the old three
card monte business. I warned you
about.that a year ago.”
“Oh, he doan’ catch me on dot.
If he belief I vhas a sucker lie finds
out deeferrent. But I vhas a leedle
mixed oop, und I like you to explain.”
“All right—what is it ?”
“In about two hours later an oldt
man mit a white heard comes in und
says I vhas Carl Dunder? I vhas. I
worry glad to see you, Air. Dunder.
I hear ahoudt you in Toledo, Cincin
nati und Chicago. Eaferpody says
you vhas sharp as some razors. , Did
sonic young man come in here mit a
puzzle? He did. Did he heat you?
Not much. Veil, dot vhas all right.
He vhas a sharper, und if he doan’
heat you dot makes me laugh—ha !
ha! ha!”
“Anil I suppose you set up the
beer ?” queried the sergeant.
“Yell, he vhas my frendt; I like
to use him nice, you know. 1’ooty
soon he sits down und pulls out three
cards, und says he oxplain dot puzzle.
He throws ’em so und so und den tells
I can pick out der shack of spades.
I put my (ingcr on dot shack, and dot
oldt man says I vhas shain-lightning.”
“And you tried it again, of course?”
“Yes, I pick dot shack omit four
times.”
“And then ?”
“Veil, next time lie says lie likes
to het me fife doltar, und I took him
oop so quick as wink.”
“Aud it wasn’t the jack ?
“No; he vhas der ace ! I like you
to explain how lie vhas mixed oop 1
like dot!”
For answer the sergeant took Mr.
Dunder by the hand and led him to
the door and dropped him ofi the step
anil pointed to the river.
“How you mean
“Go and jump in ! ”
“Vhas I some hayslacks r”
“Yes—a dozen of them !”
‘•Und I vhas skwiudlcd again ?”
“The worst way!”
“Um! Veil, good-by! If somo-
body drags oop my body I like dcr
papers to say 1 vhas poor hut honest,
und dot I died trying to understand
how she vhas in America! Ouldt
frendt, farewell!”
On Their Wedding Journey—She
—This is Minerva.
He—Was she married?
She—No; she was the Goddess of
Wisdom.—Life.
A Mathematical Expert.—Teacher
—If a man has 200 pounds of ice in
Ilia wagon aud one-fourth of it is lost
by melting,Ihow many pounds does his
cuatomcrs pay for ?
Boy (whose father is in the busi
ness)—Three thousand pounds.—Life.
GUARANTEED.
1 |)Os!l
lint i
’ KUI!
ino.q roM bv drupffiats. under
riulee from their manufact-
will do just what is claimed
benefit or cure in nil cases
oh thev are recommended,
m will lx* promptly
v .« world-famod spe-
World’s Dispensary
-that
of disonsos for ~
or the money paid for tli
refunded-jiit Dr.
cilirs, ninnnfaotin
Medical Associate
Dr. I’iorc ’s (Job
nil diseases arising
liver, or from imp -
I ml iff est ion, Pimples, BlotCm-n, uiupuuuo,
Salt-rheum, Totter, Erysipelas, and Scrofu-
Soro3 and Swellings. Consumption, or
of’Buffalo, N. V.
i Medical Discovery cures
rom a torpid or deranged
>d, ns Dyspepsia, or
Eruptions,
ofula, is also cured by this
world-famed remedy for all those chronic
weaknesses and distressing derangements so
common to American women. It is a most
potent, invigorating, restorative tome, or
strength giver, imparting tone and vigor to
the whole svstem. As n soothing nervine it
is uncf]nalcd. guarantee printed on the
bottle - wrapper and faithfully carried out
.ears.
Copyright. 1$8 8 . !
Would's Dif. Med. Ass’jj.
ior mi im-ui*ablc case of Ca-
farrh iit flic Head by tho
proprietors of Dr. Sage’sCatarrh Heinedy. By
its mild, soothing and healing properties, it
of how long
MARVELOUS
B1SCSVERY,
Jlnnory Tralnina*
cil in one reading*
llooks Ii« -
Mind wandering cared.
Every clilld nnd ndn!t tc really benefitted.
• Great iactnconi.'atH to C <rresp'>:iienco Classe*.
rrowjxjct'12, with opini >:n nf 55r. \Vm. A. Ilnm*
mon:i« tho w •! I f' M t S.Mvia:::.t In Mind l>i*cniH*y
Daniel Grccnl *; fTii«vi;»- on,
ojtist, J. M. ibicklfy, l).t>..e.Uorof tho (.,n*tian
T'lnocat'.y. y . Diehard Pro ;tar, the Hcicntir.
lions. W. W. A*.tor, Judir \< s| !non, .Until*.
1 Vro I'I'a"’lo IS K TTL?!i!i I CDf It* Av ®.N. Y
- CARBONATED2WITH—
NATURAL GAS
Imported from tlm Mineral
Springs on the •Ithiiic, Ger
many. oiAlraugVit at
L. SCHMIDT'S.
DRINK
Glen Springs
Mineral Water
For the Liver and Kidneys.
For sale at
L. SCHMIDT’S.
PASSENGER SCHEDULE
— AND —
FREIGHT SERVICE
InTEitki t Fed. 2fi, 1889, via The
PROFESSIONAL CARDS.
c:aii.u»vi>.
Suwnnee River Route to Florida.
an.bird Time same as Macron city time.
GOING SOUTH.
I.v Maeoii.....:...4 00 pm
■ Wei Is to;
1 Bonaire
1 Kathies
Findlay..
Vienna...
1 lllcli wont
“ Hahlra...
Mineola..
Ar Valdosta.
.4 JSpinj
,.507 pm
..5 18 pm
Isis!
8 01 pm
< 1" Pm
< 23 pm
..10 mm
,10 55 pill
,11 Id pm
..11 d5 pm
GOING NORTH
Valdosta. ...545 am*
Mineola.......5 36 am
Hahlra 5 54 am
Ox moor 6 09 am
Adol 6 49 nrn
Sparks 6 57 am
Loconto 7 09 am
“ Eldorado 7 ‘29 am
“ Tifton 7 59 am
“ Chula 8 17 am
“ In ah a 8 33 am
“ Sycamore....8 44 am
“ Ashburn 8 59 am
“ Dakota 9 08 am
" ArabI 9 ‘29 am
“ Wenona 9 30 am
“ Cordclo 9 47 am
" Klchwood ..10 00 am
" Vienna 10 09 am
“ Findlay 10 91 am
“ Plnehurst..l0 99 am
•• Unadllla....l0 49 am
“ Elko ..11 09 am
“ Grovanla:„ll loam
“ Tlvola 11 31 am
*■ Kathleen ...11 42 am'
“ Bonalro 1151 am
" Wellston....l2 05 pm
“ Avondalo ...12 18pra
•- Sofkee 12 28 pm
Ar Maoon 13 43 pm
Unlo:
nger trains a> rive and depart from
kissenger depot at Macon dally,
lit received and delivered At Central
Railroad Warehouses.
1 freight trains leavo Macon dally at
6:00 a. m.,aml arrive dally at 8:30 p. in.
further Information apply to your sta-
gcut or to A. C. KNAPP,
Traffic Manager,
Macon, Ga.
Fie ESI2 MEA TS.
\Vc will open, Monday, April 1st, at the
plac e lately occupied by Mr. P. II. Hone
a fine stock of fresh meats. Beef, Mntton and
Pork.
Our meets are from our own farms, fat,
uicy and sweet. We will be glad to receive
our patronage and wilk serve you with the
esl meats at the ‘lowest possible prices.
¥. P. Horn k Bb
Florida Central
—AND—
Peninsula Railroad.
Formerly the F. It. Sc IV* Co*
Standard Time Used—June 2,1889.
■} j 7 j~SOlTHKHN DIVISION 1 8 | 4
500 p 11105 a Lv Fcruandlna Ar
700 p 11 45 a bv Jacksonville Ar
C 30 p 1127 a h
8 30 p 12 4‘2 p bv
9 25 p 1 27 p Al‘
9 55 p 1 42 p Ar
Callahan
Baldwin
Lawtey
Starke
Waldo
153 p 6 40 a
1242p 5 00a
1158 a 3 55 a
'll 28a 3 90a
Ar'lO 62 a 2 50 a
llawthorno Ar!10 23 a 2 00a
4 29 p .\r Ocala Ar, 907 p 12 01 p
542 l»Ar .Wildwood Ar 8 00a 9 20p
0 10 p Ar Leesburg Ar 7 35 a 7 53p
010 p Ar Tavares Lv 710a 7 00p
822 p Ar Orlando Lv,545a, 4 00p
30
| T.U
l 1)1 VIS
r'bv Jacksonville. Ar
bv Wildwood Ar
Ar Fuuasoffkoo Ar
Ar Sumtorvlllo Ar
ArSt. Catliorlno Ar
Ar Lacoochoo Ar
j.-r Dado City Ar
Ar Plant City Lv
CIO a
845 p
800 p
730 p
6 40p
600 p
5 43 p
4 00 p
Id l*t’EDAK KEY DIV. j 14 | 24
1030 a
23 \
7 00 d 1145 a Lv Jacksonville Ar 150p 610 a
« Jo a 4 10 p Lv Waldo Ar 1035 p- 340 p
5 10 a 1 4 53 p Ar Gnlnesvlllo Ar 9 40 a; 230 p
10 45 s« i.Ar Atelier Lv s 25 a 12 15 p
! CUpAr Bronson Ar 14»n
H • Ar Cedar Koy Lvl R 30 nl
“j j pWESTERN DIVISION 1
‘7 eo ni 7 15 hi Lv Jacksonvlllo Ar; 320 pi 2 45p
c05 p SCOtt Ar Baldwin Ar. 235p/ li6p
}?S?iS«;!rr — Cjtr *
Live Oik Ar 1223 p { 9 55 a
Madison Aril 15 a| 815 a
4 10 a! 12 52 pi Ar Monticollo Lvlo30a, 5 25 a
f. 10 a' 2 02 pi Ar Tallahassee Lv 9 50 a 3 20 a
8 0on aO-lraAr Quincy Lv 807 a, 150a
9 20 a' * 00 pj A r River June. Lv | 7J5
1,2, 7, 8, 9. 10,13,14 Dally.
62, and 63 Dally.
•3.4. 23, 24, Dally, except Sunday.
30 Dally except Sunday. 31 Dally except
Monday,
rr.RNANDINA AND
t0 | C J JACKSONVILLE BRANCH | 5 | Cl
8 45 p-4 30 a Lv Jacksonville '^HWa-O 00
1005 p-coo a Kr Fcrimndlna Lv 7 13 n-4 30
5 and 6 dally, except Sunday. 60 and 61
Sundays only.
7 13 a m N**w Orleans Express. Shortest
an<l quickest "lino to all Middle aud West
Florida points, Pensacola, Mobile and New
Orleans 7 -.15 a. m. an 1 7 :30 i>. in. trains con-
nect through to Thomasville, Montgomery,
Nashville, St. Louis. Cincinnati. Chicago and
all points North and West. Arrive at 2:4a p.
"‘ll'il.l ra m'lMl mul Express for ull points
Siinth, Oalnesvlllo. Ocala, I^f-Himrg, Tavores,
Ara-nka Orlan-lo, pana«ofriicc t.St. Catharine)
D,J.- City, riant City. Arrives at 1:50p. m
7 -00 n rn I_.ca!, conned, through for all
nolilts South. Oc»la. Gainesville, l*csbnrt,
Tavares, Orlando, Tarpon Springs, Souther.
lan-1, St. Petcrahurg. an-1 Tampa. Arrives at
DR. M. M. T. HUGHINGSON,
of Lake City, Fla.,
30 Years in the Practice of Medicine,
Offers his professional services to the citi
zens of Thomasville and surrounding coun
try. Office, 2nd door over A. C. Brown’s
store, and A. C. Brown’s residence on Daw
son street. d&wGm Sept 17.
DR. A. B. COUCH,
Modern - Pathology, - Hew - Remedies,
DIRECT TREATMENT,
Offers his professional services to the citi
zens of Tlioinasvillc and surrounding coun
try. Office over Steyefman’s store, Brgad
street, Thomasville, (Ja.
9-:t-dA w I v
W. C. 8NODGKA8S. 13. F. HAWKINS
gNODUKASS & HAWKINS,
Attorneys-at-Law.
Office. Formerly occupied by Entorprlso of-
ijl M, McI.VOTSH,
Physician & Surgeon,
Thomasville, Georgia.
£P“OFFICE over Stark’s, comer Broad and
Fletcher Streets.
JJR,. JOEL B. COYLE.
DENTIST
■ THOMASVILLE, GEORGIA.
OFFICE, Bronil St., overll’ickctt’s.
g (}. mclendon,
Attorncy-at-Law,
Thomasville,
Georgia.
Prompt attention givcii to all business en
trusted to him. , ,
Offlcc—Over Watt's storo, corner|,Broau and
Jackson streets.
J II. COYLE, I). D. S.,
Resident Dentist,
Thomasville, • Goorgla.
Offers his sorvlccs to th citizens of Thom*
asvlllo and vicinity.
Offlco hours—From 9-a. m. to 1 p. m., and
fronj2 to 5 p. in.
Offlco—On Jackson street.
W. D. MITCHELL, K. G. MITCHELL.
■ITCIIELL& MITCHELL,
M 1
Attorneys-at-Law,
Thomasville, • • Georgia.
AVT liHUCE,, M. D.
Office, up-stairs.
Coinor of Broad and Fletcher streots. [aug
15-'85-3y]. •
s. DEKliE, M. D-,
- Office in Hayes Buildinj
itosldonco— Corner Collogo avenue and Mag
nollastreot. „ „ , . ^
Telephone communication, No. 25 for night
calls.
15Y FAR THE
1:10 e.
11:45
rn Cumberland IS^ute Ex press, con-
Femandlna with steamer City of
; k, dally, f Brunswick, Macon, At-
lan*a Chattan^.ga, L/.uU7llle, Cincinnati
til. L-mls aud Chicago. Arrives 1:30 p. in.
4-3op in. Fcrnandlna Mall and Express,
dally, councctlug Tuesday and Friday with
8tr ht Nicholas for Savannah and way land-
Inr-rt Thursday with Mallory Steamers for
Mow*York. Arrives 8:50a. m. Sunday train
leaves Jacksonville 8:43 a. m.
This new service glvoa perfect connections
at Baldwin for all points North and Woat, Via
Callahan to all points North, East and West.
Via Fcrnandlna, connecting with Htr. City of
Brunswick, for Brunswick, Macon, Atlanta
und all points North and West.
D. E. MAXWELL, A.O MAcDONELL,
Gen. Manager, G. F. k T. A.
N. S. PENNINGTON,
Traffic Manager.
J. W REID. Agent at Thomasvlllo. Ga.
TO THE NORTH
NORTHWEST
—IRE—
L. & JNT.
LOUISVILLE & NASHVILLE RAILROAD,
—IS THE—
SHORT LINE,
—WITH —
THROUGH SLEEPING SARS,
FRXM ALBANY TO
NASflIVI IjIjE,
EVAN'iVIM.E,
HT. I.OLIH.
And but one change to
LOIII8VILLE
CINCINNATI,
CIIICAUO.
And otUer northern cities. Always ask for
tickets via the Louisville k Nashville R. R.
For any information, write to
C. I\ ATMORK, Gen, Pass. Agt.
Louisville, Ky.
Parties haying friends in the North should
advise thereto take this j-ou^ to JThoraas-
villc during*the coming season.
routs;
—TO—
NEW TORX OR BOSTON
,SAVANNAH
—AND TfTE—
OCEANSTEAMSHIPLINE
—OF THE—
Central Railroad of Georgia.
SUMMER EXCURSION TICKETS
Now on sale at reduced rates. Good to
return until October Ulst, 1880.
Magnificent Steamers and elegant ser
vice. Free from the heat ami dust incident
to ail-rail routes. If you arc sick the trip
will invigorate and build you up. Go east
by sea and you'll never regret it.
Passengers, before purchasing tickets via
other routes, would do well to inquire first
of the merits of the Route via Knvnnunh.
Further information may be had by apply
ing to tho Agent at your station, or to
M. S. BELKNAP, \V. F. SI1KLLMAN,
General Manager. Traffic Manager
I|E. T. CHARLTON, CLYDE BOSTICK,
Gen. Pass. Agent. Trav. Pass, Agt.,
KavAnnah Ga.
Grlen&LeM,
Contractors & Builders
THOMASVILLE, GA.
Wo will bo glad to mako contracts for, or
superintend, all domes of buildings, public
or private, In either brick or wood. Will fur
nish plans aud spcciflcailons If required. If
you want any building done call on us, and
we will submit owtlmates whether contract Is
awarded us or not. Wo will guarantee satis
faction In all our work. Wo refer to tho many
buildings erected by us In Thoiiiasvlllo, nnd
to all parties for whom we have worked.
Shop on Fletcher st., 2nd door from Broad.
Thomasville, Ga., April 3, 1889,
N. S. Eaves,
CONTRACTOR and BUILDER
Thomasvlllo, Georgia.
1 will be gl$d to make contracts foi the
construction of all classes of buildings, pub
lic and private, In elthor brick or wood.
I will guarantee lu every Instance to
give satisfaction. Designs and plans drawn
and careful estimates made.
MT Mono—Good, honest work at fair
prices. If you want any building dono call
on me. I will submit estimates whether
contract is awarded mo or not. I refer to
tht many public buildings erected by me in
Thomasvlllo and elsewhere, and all parties
for whom X bavo worked*
THE PEST
Direct Route!
FROM ALL PRINCIPAL POINTS IN
TIIEfSOUTH TO CHICAGO AND
THE NORTHWEST.
Wo through express trains dAlly, with Pull
man Palace Buffet Sleeping Cars by night, ■{
and Chair Cars by day, between Clu-
cinnnttl and Chicago, Indlannpo-
Its and Chicago, and also be
tween Louisville and
Chicago,
whore close con-
P" nectlons are madfe for
8t. Paul, Fargo, BIsmArk, P<»1-
laud, Omaha, Kansas City, San Francisco
and points intermediate—
New Fast Mail,
Loavlng Louisville, Dally oxcept Sunday, at
7 *30 a. m. CIncInnatti, Daily, except Sunday,
at 7:45. Arriving at Chicago at C :55.
The most rapid servlco ever attempted be
tween tho Great Commercial Cities on the
OhloBlvor and Chicago.
jjyl hrough Coupon Tlckots, Baggage check
ed to destination, and your safety and com
fort provided for, are among tho points that
have made the
mONON ROUTE
Universally and deservedly popular.
OHN B.0.VR3ON,''Vico-pros’t and Gon’l Mgr
W. II. McDOEL, Gon’l Traffic Manager,-
E. O. MCCORMICK, Gen.l Passenger Agent-
B. W. GLADING. Passengor and Freight Agt.,
158 Broad St.. Thomasville Ga.
Whiddon House
• (Opposite PlneyWoods Hotel.)
THOMASVILLE, - GA
E. B. WhiddoA, Prop.
Tills house, located In tho most desir
able and centrnl part of the city. Is new
and completo In every particular. Fur
nished in tho most elegant manner nnd
provided with all conveniences of mod
ern hotels. Tho menu is perfect, and
tho sorvlco rendered by trained nnd-po-
lito servants. Terms reasonable, and
prices graded according to accommoda
tions furnished. Carriages from the
house meet all trains.
. declO-ly
B. D. FUDGE,
THOMASVILLE, GA., *
—-DEALER IN
HARDWARE
Stoves, Iron,
Tin and Hollow Ware,
Gus id Spit! Goods
of all. kinds, and [agent for
King’s 'Powder Co.
GEORGE FEARN,
REAL 1STAIB ACI \T,
OFFICE IN MITCHELL HOUSE BLOCK.
Cilj Mil Comlry Proper!) (or Sale,
HOUSES RENTED
And Taxc* l’> id.
LOANS
NEGOTIA TED.
Bring me a description oi your properly
Thomasville Variety
WORKS.
Reynolds, Hargrave3& Dayis, Prop’rs,
Manufacturers and Dealers
BOUGH & DR I- ED
LUMBER.
LATHES,
PICKETS,
SHINGLES,
MOULDINGS,
BRACKETS,
SCROLL WORK,
MANTLES,
BALUSTERS*
STAIR-RAILS
Newel Posts,
OFFICE, CHURCH & STORE,
Furniture.
STORE FRONTS,
Witi Screen Doors and Windows, Sash;
Doors and Blinds
TO ORDER.
STAIR BUILDING,
AND INSIDEJ HARDWOOD FINISH A
SPECIALTY.
8@-CORRESPONDENCE SOLICITED.
PRETTY
I will sell the Henry
McLendon place, 3
miles out on the Mag
nolia road to a good
man on easy terms,
at $2,5oo. This is the
best small farm, all
things considered, in
the county. 7 acres
in pears, other im-
provementsmoderate.
Open land for 2-horse
farm, admirably ad
apted to fruit and
vegetables, dairying
etc. Ill 1-2 acres,
good water and neigli
borhood; worth $5,ooo
but will sell at $2,Goo.
Also the Pittman-
Thomas place, con
sisting of 77 1-2 acres
2 1-2 miles from court
house on right side of
Magnolia road. No
waste land, level and
clay soil ; about half
open la.nd, balance in
beautiful woods, good
ten acre pear orchard,
just beginnin g to bear,
small house,fine crops
raised this year Will
throw in a good male
and one-horse wagon,
farming implements,
etc., and plenty of
feod and seed to raise
next crop. Better
worth $6ooo than most
places about town for
which that sum is
charged, but can be
bought at $3,ooo on
easy terms.
To a man who wants
a little farm conve
nient to Thomasville,
on which he can easi
ly earn a good living,
I unreservedly and
honestly recommend
either of these places.
HisilTlRiL
Four furnished rooms, up stairs,
parlor and kitchen privileges down
stairs, elegant neighborhood, Dawson
street, for rent at 867.50 a month.
This is a bargain.
Bryant place, Jackson St., Flctcli-
crville, house with 5 rooms, for rent
at 810.00 per month.
4 unfurnished rooms, up-stairs, new
and elegant neighborhood, Dawson
street, at $20,00 per month. No
children wanted.
5 room house on Washington
st., near Broad st., at 815,00
per month, by the year,
Large 7 room house on Madi
son street, near center of town,
at $20.00 per month. This is a
desirablfc and cheap house.
Upstais of house on Calhoun
street.
Furnished house in East
End, 5 rooms besides dining
room and kitchen, at $50 per
month.
REAL ESTATE BROKER,
Themasville. Greor-'ia