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8BVBRAL SAY THAT NBO SMITH
WA8 NOT MAD WHEN
HE THREW THE BOBBIN
At Baulah Tolbert—The Girl is Getting
Well Rapidly—Smith Has Not
Yet 1 urned Up,
TVhe
Miss Beulah Tolbert, who was knock
ed in the head with a speeder bobbin at
the Lower Factory Tuesday morning,
and who was thought lor a while to be
in a very critical condition, improved
rapidly Wednesday and is nesrly well
agtin.
And It also turns out that probably
there was no malice in the act of throw
ing the bobbin on the part of the boy
Ned Smith.
There are several persons who state
that Smith did not intend to strike Miss
Tolbert with the bobbin, but only threw
tho bobbin at her in fun.
At any rate, it was pretty dangerous
fun, as it turned out in the end, and
there are also many who say he was
mad, and aimed to hart the girl when
he threw the bobbin.
The wound was not a very large one,
but it was in a dangerous spot. It was
not larger than a bean, but tbe ocoipi-
tal artery was severed, and the girl
came very near bleeding to death before
Dr . Benedict arrived and stopped the
flow of blood.
Miss l'olbert is very near well now.
§tnith has not yet turned up.
BEST, SWEET BEST.
'Funeral of Mrs. fluey P. Aampkln
Wednesday.
Wednesday afternoon at tbree o’clock
tbe funeral exercises over the remains
of Mrs. Lucy P. Lampkin were con
ducted at the First Methodist church,
where for forty-eight years she had
faithfully worshipped her Master.
As the pallbearers bore the casket
forward to the ohaneel, the choir con
sisting of Mrs. George T. Hodgson,Mrs.
J. R. Crane, and Mr. M. K. Layton,
ea* g sweetly that immortal song,
* Gathering Home.”
Rev. T. R. Kendall read lessons of
great beauty from the Scriptures and
then oflered up an earnest, fervent
prayer.
Th« choir then sang “Asleep in
Jesus,” that funeral hymn that inva
riably bids tbe teardrops start.
Rev. Eustace W. Speer, a life-long
friend of the departed mother in Israel,
preached the funeral sermon from the
text: “Come unto Me all ye that labor
and are heavy laden, and I will give
you rest.” . _
It was a sermon, the like of which is
rarely heard in Athens. This eloquent
divine in terms of beanty and tender
ness depicted tbe perfect rest vouch
safed to the Christian as compared with
the unrest of tbe sinner. Rest, sweet
rest had been given to the departed, for
at the early age of fifteen she had given
her heart to God.
Rev. T. R. Kendall made brief and
touching remarks concerning the last
dava of tbe deceased.
The choir saig tbe recessional hymn,
j?‘In the Sweet by and by," and the sol
emn cortege moved to Oconee cemetery
where the remains of Mrs. Lampkin
were consigned to mother earth.
IN THE QUIET CEMETERY
The Mortal Remains of Cicero Bailey
are flald to Rest
The funeral of Mr. Cicero Bailey Wed
nesdsy morning at ten o’clock at tbe
boui-i of bis father, Mr. Thomas Bailey,
was attended by a large number of
friends of the yoang man, who had come
to pay their last sad tribute of affeo-
tion.
Never in this city was there a sadder
occasion, for a young man bad been
suddenly out down in the vigor of life,
and when the young die, * there is al
ways an additional sorrow.
The choir sang sweetly several divine
fnnfra) hymns that moved the large
circle of friends to tears.
Riv. T. R. K-jndall conducted tbe
’ exercises in a most solemn and
.jive manner. His tender and
Earned prayer was that the Almighty
-»*»ove tbe Borrow that had come
Sf> w . .amily, and in His own gen-
*«y comfort them in their affliction.
Dr. Kendall's remarks were very ap-
iropriate to the occasion, and will
ong be remembered by all who were
iresent.
The casket was borne forth to the
earse by a number of the dead hoy’s
riends and soon in the quiet cemetery
be mortal remains of Cioero Bailey
'ere laid to rest.
A CRAZY MAN
aka Sheriff Wter to Let Children Out
of tho Court House.
Sheriff Wler had some experience
itha crazy man yesterday morning.
The Sheriff heard his dog barking
ry loud, and got ont of bed and went
see what waa tbe matter, and asked
holt was, when a man spoke up and
id the Lord bad Bent him to tbe Sber-
to have the obildren turned out of
a court house.
The Sheriff know at onoe the man
is crazy. *nd informed him that all
a qhfldren were in jail in stead of the
irt house.
I he crazy man was from Jackson
mty.
>amass Suit.—John M. Stokely, of
Afford, has lllod a suit acainRt R.L
s-& Co., for ten thousand dollars.
.Stokoly claims that he had shipped
m a considerable lot of cotton and
y refused to pay a small draft that
iad drawn on then, thereby dam-
his cn dit. Thomas A Strickland
tbe attorneys for Mr. Stokely.
A Quiet Election Wednesday for City
Officers.
The election for Aldermen in tho dif
ferent wards was held Wednesday, and
all those who were elected in tbe pri
mary still held their own on a small
vote. The vote was as follows:
1st Ward—McKinnon, 64
2nd Ward— Lucas, 44
3rd Ward—Welch, 20
4th Ward—Vincei t, 40
There was very little interest taken in
the election aa the primary had settled
the question.
Bafley Ogietree,
On Wednesday afternoon at 3 o’clock,
at tbe residence of the bride’s parents,
Mr. B. W. Bailey and Miss Annie M
Ogietree were united in marriage, Rev.
E D Stone officiating. The groom is
a well known and popular young man
of this city, while his bride is one of
Clarke county’s most lovely and charm
ing yonog ladies. They have the best
wishes of a large cirole of friends and
acquaintances in their new life.
A QUIET DAY.
The President’s Message Was Read in
Both Houses.
Washington, Dec. 7.—In marked con
trust with the bustling scene tbe open
ing ifiay was the meeting of the house
the second day. There were few per
sons In the galleries, and upon tbe floor
the members seemed to have settled
into tbe old routine. They attended to
their correspondence at drafted bills and
resolutions to present to the house; or in
knots of two and three chatted or
scanned the newspapers.
In a feeling manner and amid the de
vout attention of all the members, who
remained standing, the chaplain allud
ed to the recent afflictions which the
president had suffered, and invoked
divine protection upon tbe bereaved
ones. .
Mr. Rayner, of Maryland, introduced
a bill for the better protection of com
merce and to establish a national quar
antine. Referred.
Mr. Lester, of Georgia, introduced a
hill amending the act of January 21,
1801, so as to correct the erroneous
public building „„
Ga., by authorizing the sale of the saia
property including the abandoned ma
sonry work thereon.
, A correct description thereof, the bill
says, being land owned by the United
States, known as a site for the United
States conrthoonse and postoffice build
ing, situated about 243 feet and 11 inches
on York street, by 90 feet on Abercom,
and 246 feet on York street lane.
At 12;15 Mr. Pruden, one of the presi
dent’s secretaries, waa annnounosd and
presented the annual message which
clerk immediatelv began to read.
In the Senate.
As soon as the secretary finished read
ing the journal, Mr. Pruden, one of the
president’s secretaries, appeared at the
main door and delivered the president’s
annual message, which was thereupon
laid before the senate and read by sec
retary McCook.
The commercial and business statis
tics given in the first part of the mess
age and the sarcastic paragraphs aa
to the supposed effects of tariff
tor revenue seemed to meet with
general approval on the Republican
tide of the chamber, while they attract
ed little attention on the other side.
During the reading the Democratic
senators were for the most part, chat-
t listlessly with each other orattend-
to their correspondence; while the
iblican senators on the contrary
the president the compliment of
to his message their undivided
Kopul
paid
FOUR FIRMS FAIL.
The Heaviest Business Failures Ever
Known tn the Delta.
Nbw Orleans, Dec.- 7.—A Times-
Democrat’s Greenville, Miss., special
says: The heaviest mercantile failure
ever recorded in Yazoo (Miss.) Delta
occurred when the great wholesale
house of L. & N. Wilchinski closed its
doors and carried into bankruptcy with
it the firm of Wilchinski & Barnes, at
Barnes’ landing.
Wilchinski & Reisem, at Erwin sta
tion, and George Wilchinski, of Green
ville, also came into the failure.
The Total Liabilities Will Beach
nearly $400,000, of which about $200,000.
is preferred and secured by selling the
extensive stock of goods in their store,
here, with hooks, notes, etc., for $72,000
and giving deeds of trust on real estate
in this section.
It is understood that attorneys forthe
unsecured creditors will attach proper
ty, refusing to recognize the sale.
The Failure Was Forced
By malicious rumors circulated ten
days ago that they had failed, coupled
with the fact that they had lame in
vestments in land, and short crons and
the failure to collect bills had embar
rassed them, and the rumors of failure,
destroying their cridit, forced the fail
ure.
SHIP SUNK IN PORT.
A Norwegian Bark Went Down In Sight
of Help.
Liverpool, Dec. 7.—A very heavy
gale prevails in this vicinity, and a tre
mendous sea is running at the mouth of
the Mersey river, making it extremely
difficult for vessels to seek to enter or
clear the river. A bark which, from
her general appearance, is supposed to
be a Norwegian vessel, is aground on
Burbo Bank. It was evident from the
manner in which she was Handled that
the has no pitch on board.
As soon asher headway was stopped the
sea made a clean breach over her, some
times completely hiding her from view
with the exception of her masts.
Fifteen minutes after she struck her
mainmast and mizzentop went over her
side. Shortly afterwards the vessel fell
Over on her side and was completely
submerged. Life boats put out out for
tho bark as soon as her position was
soon, but their progress against the gale
and sea was slow, and the bark went
down before they reached her. It is
supposed that everybody on the bark
was lost.
If you have earn for sale call on Dr.
Lyndon.
AS RENDERED BY THE NORTH
GEORGI \ CONFERENCE.
NO GREAT SURPRISES.
The Preachers Who Will Serve the
Methodist Churches In the North
Georgia Conference During the
Coming Year.
Madison, Ga., December 7.—’The ap
pointments have been made and here
they are. They were read ont by
Bishop Fitzgerald yesterday morning,
and after they had been announced the
conference adjourned to meet at Gaines
ville next year. There were no great
surprises.
The appointments are:
ATHENS DISTRICT.
Presiding Elder, H H Parks.
Athens, First Cbnrch, W P Lovejoy.
Oconee Street, S R England.
Factory Mission, W F £olley.
Winterville, J B Holland, E G Hur
rah, supernumerary.
Athens Cirouit, W M D Bond.
Appalaobee, H M Harrison.
Lexington, E A Gray.
Watkinsville, E B Rees.
Washington, H S Bradley.
Broad River, Crawford Jaokson.
Little River, O B Quillian.
Greeneaboro, J J AnBley.
Greeno Circuit, F W McClesky.
White Plains, J B Alien.
Norwood, A J Hughes,
Woodstock, J C Sorrow.
Crawfordvllle, Circuit, J R Lewis.
NORTH ATLANTA DISTRICT.
Presiding Edtr, J W Heidt; First
Church, J B Robins; Payne’s Church,
J I Daves; Grace,TB Kendall and J
W Roberts, sup.; Merritta Avenue, IS
Hopklna and J M Lowry; St. James,
W C Dunlap; Edgewood, J M White;
Epwortb, J T Davis, Jr., and J R
Mason, eup.; Fulton, F P Brown; Mar
ietta, H J Knit; Acwortb, W T Cald
well ; Cobb, A D Echols and J A Burtz,
supply ; Woodstock, D C Brown; Holly
Springs, J N Sullivan; Freemanville,
W L Singleton; Canton, P A Heard;
Wale sea, C E Pattillo; Douglasville,
W*A Parks; Douglasville Circuit, J W
Taylor; Austell and Lithia, H L Ed
monson ; Powder Springs, J A Rey
nolds; Editor Wesleyan Advocate, W F
Glenn; Missionary Secretary, H C
Morrison; Georgia School of Tecb-
no’ogy, I 8 Hopkins; Agent Orphans’
Home, H L Crumley; Reinhard Col
lege, C E Pattillo; North and East At
lanta Mission, J H Little and E M
Stanton; Agent Preaohers’ Aid So
ciety, C A Evans.
SOUTH ATLANTA DISTRICT.
Presiding Elder, T F Pierce; Trinity,
Walker Lewis and W D Shea, sup ;
Walker Street, W A Dodge; St. Paul,
W T Bell; Park Street, West End, J
W Lee and J R Smith; Asbury and
West Side, C V Weathers; St. Johns, C
C Cary; Bust Point, J M Tumlin and
B H Sasnet; Bolton, J M Owens; Pal
metto and Fairburn, T A Seals and L
PN-ese, fup.; Paimitto Circuit, E C
Marks; Jackson, J H Bakes; Fayette
ville, E H Wood; Inman, Casper
Wright; Flonlla,JobnSpefr; Jenkic-
inrg, J S Askew; Morrows’ Station,
W E Tarpley; McDonough, W W Brins-
fleld; Locust Grove, J A Thurman;
Conference- Colporteur, J T Curtis;
Sooth Atlanta Mission, T R McCarty.
AUGUSTA DISTRICT.
Presiding Dlder, Gecrge W Yar
brough ; St. John, W W Wadsworth;
St. James, W F Quillian; Asbury, J W
G Watkins; St. Lake, BEL Timmons;
Broad btreet, B F Fraser; WcodlawD,
W S Stevens; Warrenton, J W Stipe;
Cu verton G W Thomas; Sparta, E B
Cook; Hancock, H L Embry; Milledge-
ville, K J Bigbam; Richmond, J D
Milton; Marvina Chapel; H W Morris;
Appling, F RSmith; Harlem, C S
Owens;Thomson, A W Williams; Me-
sens, H M Strozier; Baldwin, J Y M
Morris; South Bfldwin, F L Church;
Missionary to Japan, Semean Shaw;
Chaplain to Asylum, T H Gibson;
Payne Institute, BL Campbell.
DAHLOHIGA DISTRICT.
Presiding Elder, M L Underwood;
Dahlonegs, W T Honnfontt, and G
Hughes supernumerary; Lampkin, J
R Seaborn, enpply; N F Howard, sup
ply; Cleveland, H M Newton and A C
Ledford, supply; Clayton, W A Sim
mons; Towns, J N Snow; Blairsville,
To be supplied; Morganton, J C At
kinson, supply; Ellijay, F P Spencer;
Jasper, Ford McRee; Dawsonville, GW
Narr; Clarksville, RT DuBoae; Mossey
Creek Academy, H M Newton; Young
L G Harris College, C C Spence.
DALTON DISTRICT.
Presiding Eider* H J Adams; Dalton
AW Quillian; Dalton Circuit, M D
Smith; Cohutta, J W Gober, supply;
Spring Place, J N Myers and J D Tur
ner; Fairmount, S Leake; Fairview, N
A Parson, supply; Calhonn, W T
Hamby; Adairs ville, F S Hudson;
Re8aoa, T T Turner, supply; Floyd
Sprirg>, J F Tyson; Snbligna, L D
Coggins and J W L Gilreath; Summer
ville, J E Rosser.; Lafayette and Chiok-
amaug * 1 * * * * * * , R R Johnson; Triou and
Bmomtown, F Walton; Kensington,
W R Kennedy; Ringgold, W G Han
son; Tunnell Hill, Clayton Quillian;
Kingston, J E England; Dalton Fe
male College, G J Orr.
KLBZRtON DISTRICT.
Presiding Eld r, J F Mixon; Elhrr-
ton, W L_ Wooten; Bethlehem, LT
Johnson; Bowman, B Sanders and W
T N rman, supply; Hartwell, R B O
England and J N Wall,supply; Roys-
ton, A H S Bugg; Carnesviile, J R
Sp ck; L-iyonla, F D CsntreM; Toc-
coa, BP Allen; Avalon, W A Cooper,
supply; Danielsville, J M Sawell;
Jeffersrn.G TKingr Harmony Greve,
WR Branham, jr; Lmcolnton, NE
Presiding Elder, M J Cofer; Gaines
ville, S R Bdk; Mjrtle Stree', C M
Verde); Hall Circuit, T P Graham;
Graham; Flowery branch, A C Can
trell; Buford, J E R< rie; Cbeetatoe, J
G Davis, supply; Camming, W C Fox;
Jug Tavern, W P River?; Gwinnett,
GWMorgin; Lawrence villa and 8“-
wanee, J L Moon; Logansviile, H' R
Davies; Monroe, W B Dillard; Snell-
ville, F A Rtgsdale, rsupply; Noicross,
JW Quillian; Alpharetta, J L Ware;
Roswell, J A Sewell; Belton, W R
Sti’lwell, supply; Hoeobton Mission, S
H Braswell, supply.
GRIFFIN DISTRICT.
Presiding Elder, J S Bryar.; Griffin,
HM Quillian; Hanleiter, L P Winter;
Milner, T O Rorie and R W Rodgers,
supernumerary; Orchard Hill, J F
B&lis; Zebulon, E K Aiken; B&rnea-
vllle,J R McCleaky; Upaon, J W
Bailey; Tbe Rock, A B Pope; Thom
as ton, D J My rick; Culloden, R A
Seale; Forsyth, J M Bowden; Forsyth
Circuit, R P Marty n; West Monroe, L
M Lyle; Senoia, W M Winn; Turin,
W J Cotter; Jonesboro, T If Timmons;
Hampton, B HTrammel; Concord, J E
Russell.
LAGRANGE DISTRICT.
Presiding Eider, W F Cook; La-
Grange, R W Bigbam; Troup and
Factory, W H Speer, West Point, W R
Foote; West Point Circuit, J S E -ubry;
Hcgansville, J T Lowe; Grantville, W
F Robison; Newnan, F G Hughes;
North Coweta, J P Burgess; Chipley,
J T Christian; Greenville and Trinity,
J R Parkei; Mountville, A S. Harris;
Woodbury, TJ Warliok; Pine Moun
tain, G C Andrews, Carrollton, A G
Worley; Wbitesburg, A Lester; Boop-
villc, W Murdock; Bowden, J 8 L
Sappington; Franklin, W T Hamilton;
Clem, W L Davenport, supply; La-
Grange Female College, H M Smith;
WhiteBburg High School, G W Greintr.
OXFORD DISTRICT.
Presiding Elder, W D Anderson; Ox
ford, J E Dickey and J S Moore; Cov
ington, S P Richardsou; Conyers, M
H Dillard; Lithonia and Rockland, O
C Simmons and F J Washburn; Clarks-
ton, W G Crawley; Decatur, P M Ry-
burn; Social Circle, J T Richardson
Newbcrue,JH Daniel; Shady Dale,
C L Patillo; Monticello, S. H. Dimon;
Madison, A C Thomas; Eatonton, J A
Timmerman; East Putnam, S B Led
better; West Putnam, W Dunbar;
Morgan, L H Green; Clinton, L H
Green; Porter Dale, M H Eikes; Em
ory College, Warren A Candler.
ROHR DISTRICT.
Presiding Elder, J T Gibson: First
Church Rome, W W Bays; Second
Church Rome, G W Duvall; City Mis
sion, C A JamisonNorth Rome, T S
Edwards; Coosa, J W Brown; Cave
Springs, W A Farris; Cedar town, J R
Kinfp, J T Norris, supernumerary; Co-
durtown Circuit,T J . Edwards; Rook-
mart, R F E ikes and R H Jones, sup
ply; Dallas, WJ 9o»d; Etst Pauld
ing, C C O’Neal; Paulding, C E Dow
dell, supply; Villa Rios, M P Wil
liams; Hickory Level, J M Fowler;
Buchanan Mission, S A Harris; Bre
men Missinr, J M Crow, supply; Tal
lapoosa, W T Irvine; Cartersville, J
H Masbburn; Piedmont Institute, E W
Ballinger and S W Rodgers, professor;
Agent Orphan’s Home. Sam P Jones.
LCCATID. .
At his own request, Rev S D Evans
was located.
UNIVERSITY TRUSTEES.
Appointments of Governor Northen
Confirmed by the Senate.
Atlanta, Ga., Dec. 7 —The Senate
went into exoeutive session yesterday
and confirmed five trustees of the State
University. <
Governor Northen had sent in tbe
nominations the day before and they
bad gone over
The trustees ol the State University
and their terms are:
A O Bacon, of Macon, sixth congres
sional district, for the unexpfred term
of four year* from August 23,1889, and
for tbe fall term of eight years from
August, 1893.
Camming, of Augusta, tenth
district, for eight years from August
23,1891.
D B Hamilton, of Rome, seventh dis
trict^ for eight years from August 23,
1893.
N J Hammond, of Atlanta, the state
at large, for eight years from August
23,1893.
Andrew Cobb, of Athens, for the on-
expired term of four years from Au
gust 23, 1889, and for the full term of
eight years from August 23, 1893.
SETTLED FOR A TIME.
The Threatened Strike on the Central
Win Not Happen Soon.
Savannah, Ga., Deo 7.—The threat
ened strike on tbe Central road is off
for a while.
Chief Arthur called on President
Wadley today. The meetmg was quite
cordial and the gentlemen got down to
business immediately. ,
Arthur spoke to Wadley of the ob
jects of the Brotherhood and of the do*
tition which the ergineera made for in
creased pay.
Mr. Wadley glanc.d at tho petition
and then referred Chief Arthur to the
contract the (J- mral hail with his en
gineers, w hich stipulated that ninety
days notice must be given the road when
changes of the contract were demanded.
‘ Do you, Mr. Wadley.-desire to avail
yourself of the failure of our men to give
you this notice?”
“I am living up to the contract, I re
quire tbe ninety days’ notice.”
‘•You are resting on your rights. The
brotherhood has uoibii g more to say.
For the p esent that matter is settled.”
And They are Slashing at Appropria
tions With a Vim.
Atlanta, Ga., Dec. 7.—Tho House of
Representatives is bustling business.
The members have their knives ont and
are slashing at appropriations.
Today the c imtnon school fund was
cut down to $600,u00, a redaction of a
half million dollars.
FORENINST THE BOAT.
A Strange Animal with a Bed and Green
Light.
There waa a carious mixture of the deep
water sailor and the longshoreman in the
rigging of this ooastwise captain as he
meditatively leaned np against a project
ing spile on the dock where his schooner
lay unloading. A similar figure was bear
ing down tho dock toward the schooner
when he was bailed by the captain, and
coming about 'made alongside tbe spile,
and tbe two seafaring men exchanged a
hearty greeting. —
“Well, cap’en,” said the newcomer,
“prosperous trip?”
"Fair to middlin, fair winds mostly and
easy water,” answered the skipper. "Noth
in unusual in the way of excitement un
less it was tbe goings on of a grampus that
I shipped in Philadelphia on the home
trip. While we was tied up at the Read
ing wharves loading with coal an Irish
man walked aboard looking for a job. He
was very anxious for work, and 1 was
Bbort banded, so I took him on. It wasn’t
the first time I ever shipped a green lub
ber, nor yet an Irishman, but if that fel
low didn’t know less about tbe ways of a
vessel than a wooden Indian then tl))£
river don’t smell. He worked all right in
tbe hold, but when we waa under way I
had a mind to try him on the lookout after
we struck clear water, as he couldn’t tell
a halliard from a sheet line. There ain’t
much for ..the man for’ard to do when we
was outside, but I instructed him plain
enough what to do, and he was tickled
with the job. ’Long about dark I staid on
deck, tbe mate at the wheel, so as J could
tell just about what the new man • was
doing an>l what lie was good for.
“Pretty £omi the lookout comes aft and
says, ’There’s something foreninst the
boat, sorr.’
“ ‘What is it?’ I says, at the same time
motioning to the mate at the wheel.
“ ‘I don’t know, sorr,’ says the man.
“ ‘Well, go back and find out and report,’
I says then, and back he goes. A few min
utes and back he comes aft.
“ ‘I don’t know what it is yet.’ he says,
‘but it’s coming this way, and we can find
ont for sure in a little while.’
“ ‘Yon go for’ard, and don’t come back
till yon know what it is,’ says I, gettiu
mad. He goes up again, but is back again
in a minute and all smiling.
“ ’Weill’ says L
“‘If you please,sorr, 1 don’t know for
sure what it is,’ says he, ’bat whatever it
is, it has a red light and a green light; and
I think it most be a drag sthore.’ ”—Prov
idence Journal.
A Pathetic Appeal.
A young barrister in his first case was
called upon to defend a couple of deep
dyed villains for whom there was no
chance of escape. He wound np his ad
dress to the jury as follows: “Gentlemen,
there is in tbe south of France a small vil
lage of 800 inbabitAtn. In that village
there stands a house; in that bouse there
live an aged conple with their onlyd&ugh
ter. Tbe old man is perusing a paper with
feverish anxiety; the old lady is shedding-
tears over her knitting; the young woman
sits at the window gazing wistfully at the
sky. They are waiting to hear the result
of this trial, which will cause them im
mense delight or profound despair, accord
ing as my case is won or lost, for that old
man is my father, that aged woman is my
mother and the yoang person is my sister I”
■—Green Bag.
Before Starting.
Miss Coopah—Look a-yer, Lige, has yo*
been practicing
Lige—Yes, indeed, honey. I took two
boxes o’ Mrs. Winslow's sbootin sirdp.—
Lippincott’s Magazine.
A Professional Opinion.
Fair Patient—Doctor, I have taken great
quantities of your medicines, "and .(hey
don’t seem to help me one bit. Some of
my friends say I would get better if 1
would buy a bicycle and ride it. What do
yon advise?
Doctor (alarmed)—My dear young friend,
in my. opinion there is nothing in the
world so-so nngracefnl and out of place
as a young woman on a bicycle.—Chicago
Tribune.
A Mysterious Case.
The body of a man was taken from the
water by a New York policeman.
“Does anybody know anything about this
man?” asked thepolicemanof someurehins
who were present.
“We seed him Just as ho came tlp for the
last time, but we fergot ter ask him what
his name was,” said one of the boys —
Texas Siftings.
Toole Jfo Chances.
Fond Parent—How dare you match pen
nies? Don’t yon know that gambling Is a
crime?
Bobby—What is gambling, pop?
Fond Parent—Indulging in a game of
chance.
| Bobby-Not guilty, pop. i have a penny
( with two heads.—Truth. -W.- I J
sb
<
Bound to Skate.
Idttle Boy—Papa, 1 wish you’d get me
some skates.
Papa—Skates? There’s no ice.
“I want to have’em ready when the Ice
comes.”
"Some winters there is no ice at alL”
“Well, roller skates’ll do.”—Good News.
Conclusive Proof.
Elder Goodman-Well, Johnny, did you
have a good time Thanksgiving?
tJow n £7 A S'"? i imef I should
58 b .^ to Bit np with me for
the next three nights.—Boston Courier.
A Test of Friendihlp.
Featherstone—I wonder how much long
er I can wear this dress suit? 8
Ringway That depends on how much
jfo Patriotic Citizen Could Stand Snch a
Disgrace.
“•Taint food,” he urged as he ambled
along beside a Tribune reporter crossing
City Hall park, “ ’taint even beer.”
“Then it’s four or five small children, all
starving,” suggested the reporter.
“No, ’taint."
“Sick wife maybe—sick for two months.
No doctor and no medicine. Want a dime
to get both?”
“No, ’taint.”
“What is it, then?” asked the reporter,
looking with some curiosity at the small
and dilapidated individual beside him.
“I have no wife, and I have no children,”
said the small man mildly, “but my old
mother keeps house for me oVer in Brook
lyn."
“Case of mother Instead of wife,” mur
mured the reporter.
“And I find myself in a horrible situa
tion.” continued the small mao, ignoring
the interruption. “As 1 was about to start
for my bumble home I suddenly thought
of the comet.”
“The what?”
“The comet—this dreadful monster ap
proaching through the heavens.”
“What of that?”
“What of it? Why, that comet Is 40,000
miles in diameter.”
“Well?"
“It has a tail 5,000,000 miles long.”
“Suppose it has?”
“Do you realize—why, my dear sir, do
you realize,” ejaculated the small man,
solemnly removing the pretzel shaped rem
nant which did duty os a hat, “that that
comet is now only 1,000,000 miles away
and traveling 1,000 miles a second head on
for the United States?”
The reporter admitted that tbe situation
was grave.
“Yon see,” continued the small man
earnestly, “there is no telling when tbe
sUbck may come. I am on my way home,
and as I have no money I must walk all
the way. Mind, I am not asking for cash,
because I never drink beer, and I like to
walk, but while that mighty comet is
flashing toward ns through the realms of
space I want to ask yon a solemn ques
tion."
"Out with it.”
“My dear sir, would you be willing-
heavens and earth,what a horrible thought!
—would you be willing to have an American
citizen hit by a foreign comet without one
cent in his clothes?”—New York Tribune.
Ei Hus should • a p. p
ever ,, tod medictoTfe
|ura .^teJmr. wd enrich the bl^J
No Limit.
The orthodox clergyman of a New Eng
land village, recently placed in a trying po
sition, acquitted himself with unusual
caution. If not with perfect success. Tbe
occasion was the funeral of a Mr. Follet,
the third husband of Mrs. Follet, a wom
an much younger than he. The Follets’
regular clergyman was away at the time
of Mr. Follet’s death. In this emergency
tbe family called upon tbe orthodox clergy
man, who was almost a stranger. A neigh
bor instructed him hastily os to tbe admi
rable qualities of the deceased and his fam
ily relations.
Daring the funeral discourse no ontsidet
would have suspected that the clergyman
had not been a lifelong friend of the la to
Mr. Follet. When he came to mention the
widow in bis prayer, however, it waa evi
dent that his data had become somewhat
confused. He said, “And now we com
mend to thy care this widowed handmaid,
who has been bereaved again and again
and again”—then hesitating an instant he
added, “and perhaps again.”—Argonaut.
Bring on Your Bear.
. Josh Billings spent a number of sum
mers at a famous White mountain hostel
ry at the foot of Mount Washington.
On the way to Emerald pool, one of the
numerous “points of interest” near the ho
tel, this nature’s nobleman hod improvised
a spring Of crystal purity, and embellished
it with some of bis inimitable Verses and
the warning:
Whoever steals this little enp
Will by bears be eaten up.
One day the enp was missing. On the
piece of birch bark below tbe poet’s lines
some thirsty soul had written:
The cup is gone, 1 don't know where.
And now. Josh Billings, bring on yonr bear.
—Harper's Bazar.
Con Amove.
The barroom loafer had eaten. 196 big
Oysters in forty minutes, and thereby had
won a wager for a professional sport who
had backed him to the extent of fifty dol
lars.
"You needn’t have exerted yourself so
much,” said the sporting man, rolling up
his winnings in a compact wad and pocket
ing the pile. “The bet was that you could
eat 175 oysters in an hour.”
"I know it, boss,” replied the oyster eater
apologetically, “but I hadn’t bad anything
to eat for four hoars, and I was hungry.”—
Chicago Tribane.
Quite the Contrary.
Daughter—Pa, did my friend call on you
last evening to get your ultimatum in Yho
matter of his suit?
Pa-Hedid.
Daughter—And you expressed yourself
with yqpr whole soul, I hope.
Pa—On the contrary, my dear, I ex
pressed him with my whole sole.—Boston
Courier.
A Russian Joke.
At a country ball—“My dear sir, yon
have just stepped on my partner’s foot. I
demand satisfaction!”
“Oh, certainly! Yonder sits my wife; go
and step on her foot^-Peterburgskaya
Goseta.
Effectual.
Husband—How is it that the cats*didn’t
trouble us last night?
Wife—I threw out one of your new neck
ties.—Troth.
A Score.
Hard Up Gent—Say, boss, can’t yer give
® toUcx a few cents to help him aloug?
Mr. Delawney—Why don’t you do some
thing faw yaw oun living? Yon had better
ask for bwaina instead of money.
Hard Up Gent—Well, boss, I asked yer
for what I thought yer had the most of.—
—Brooklyn Life.
“Handsome is that handsome does,”
and r Hood’s Sarsap rMla doesn’t do
handsomely then nothing doe’. Have
you ever tried it?
■
Hereafter in England, aee.>r(]ins: to
a recent decisi n, a mao can sue the
preachers for scaring his wife into g^-
lng to church instead of staying at home
and cooking his dinner. It is & little
difficult, thinks the Herald, to tell where
religion ends and intimidation begins.
Savannah Press
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TiTPPMAIi BROS., Proprietors,
SAVANNAH. - - - - GEORGIA.
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Stationery
OF EVERY VARIETY.
Lowest Prices!
D. W. MGregor,
Successor to Burke,
BOOK STORE CORKER,
Established 50 Years.
ATHENS, .... GEORGIA
April 12 wtf
WS ABE NOW SELLING
HOME-MADE SHOES
g ! M1 descriptions for men, women an<l school
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Abo havo on hand a good stock of
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;; ATHENS, GA
We Buy Hides, Tallow and
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SHACKEiMU & SilltKELK®.
f
ATTORNEY S-AT-LAW,
ATHENS, GA.
» Office with Erwin & Cobb.
The finest asssoroni«nt of
per stock in the city at
■
