An Essentia! Thing,
and there are many, in the management of
bank is the personal, painstaking care of
its officers. Recognizing this responsibility,
the officers of this institution keep them
selves in touch with every important detail
of the business. And the outcome? A
generous, and a steadily increasing
THE WINDER BANKING CO.
Buyers of € often Seed.
We are in the market f<r Cotton Seed. Most
convenient place in the city to weigh and unload.
Highest Market Price Paid
Will exchange Cotton S 'ed Meal and Hulls for
Cotton Seed. See us at the store.
LAY & GRAHAM,
WINDER LUMBER CO.
WINDER, GEORGIA. Phone 47.
ON THE FLAT SHELL
Oy*tr Opened That Way With a Pur
pose, the Waiter Said.
The waiter had taken a long time In
getting the oysters, but as he was well
known to his guests and his guests to
hint that occasioned no comment.
When the oysters were brought the
waiter set them down before his cus
tomer and asked:
“Do you like them better that way?"
The diner looked, but he didn’t no
tice any difference, so he asked, "What
“Why, on the flat shell," replied the
waiter. “Don’t you see they aren’t on
the curved part of the shell, as usual?"
“I see it now that you tell me about
It,” said the diner, "but 1 don’t exact
ly get the 6igniticance."
“Well, you see.” said the waiter,
"they always keep them upstairs on
the round shell, and when any one calls
for oysters if they do come on the
round shell it isn’t a certainty that
they have been opened fresh. Some
times they aren’t good, just because
they have been standing. When 1 call
for them on the flat shell, as I do for
some of my customers, then they have
to open them specially for that order
In that way you get them fresh."
“Ah. I see!" remarked the diner.
But when he told the professional
cynic about it the cynic said some
thing about betting that they kept
them standing opened in both ways.
"Besides, any one knows they look
fatter on the flat shell, which is all
the more reason they’d be likely to
serve them to some folks that way. If
they asked for extra large oysters
they’d get them on the flat shell. The
same oysters on the curved shell would
go as ordinary sized oysters,” remark
ed the cynic gloomily.—New York Sun.
The Humble Librettist.
In the history of opera there are
many curious anomalies, but perhaps
the strangest is the role played by the
librettist. For the most part obscure
A Cordial Christmas Greeting
is extended to all our friends
and patrons, with many thanks
for past favors, and trust that
we will not be forgotten when
good lumber and efficient
service is needed in the future.
We can always be found at
Winder, where a well selected
stock of hard and soft woods,
paints, etc. is entirely at your
service for all building pur
and unimportant and generally unre
membered. his ranks have neverthe
less been recruited from the ablest and
most brilliant men of letters. Among
those who have undertaken the part
are such unlikely narneM as Voltaire.
Goethe, Wleland, Addison and Field
ing, while others of considerable poet
ic talent, as. for example. Metastasio.
Calzabigi. Rinucclni, Boito and Cop
pee, have tried their hand at libretto
writing with assurance, giving to It
their best efforts. And yet the suc
cessful librettists are few—the merest
handful out of a harvest of three cen
How Sunshine Beats Down.
It is a common thing on hot days to
hear people say that "the sun beats
down." Rut few suspect that the rays
of light actually do beat down upon the
surface they strike. Light is a wave
motion in the ether, and waves, wheth
er of sound or water, press on bodies
in their wuv. Clerk Maxwell calculated
the pressure of light, and experiments
of Herr Lebedew have shown that he
was right. The pressure is very slight,
as may be supposed, but it really ex
Mamma—Johnny, you bad boy.
you’ve been fighting again! Your
clothes are so badly torn that I’ll
probably have to get you anew suit.
Johnny—That’s nothing, mamma. You
Just ought to see Tommy Jones. I’ll
bet his mamma will have to get anew
Mr. Struckoil—That there sculptor
feller says he’s goin’ to make a bust
of me. Mrs. Struckoil—Henry, it’s
dreadful the way you talk. Say
•’burst." not “bust."—Philadelphia Rec
Many a woman’s make-up pre
vents her from holding the mirror
up to nature.
OLD WORLD AHMiES
Drafting Methods by Which Their
Strength is Maintained.
TRICKS OF THE CONSCRIPTS.
All Manner of Dodges Are Adopted by
the Eligible Young Men to Avoid the
Enforced Military Service That Is So
Hateful to Them.
We hear a good deal about conscrip
tion. but few people know what It ac
tually means. In no country is every
person who is able to light drafted
into tlte army. All males who are lia
ble to serve undergo a physical exam
ination, resulting in only a certain
number being passed as tit for service.
No government has sufficient funds
to draft the whole of these men into
tlte regular army, so a selection is
made by ballot, the number of men en
rolled varying according u> the funds
in the hands of the authorities.
The pay provided for the conscript
is necessarily very trilling indeed ami
will not compare with that paid to vol
unteer soldiers. In fact, it is generally
true that the conscript must full back
upon his private means.
The methods vary in each country
Hut take the case of one Kuropean
power. Every male subject not phys
ically incapacitated is liable to enter*
the army at the age of twenty, al
though those who care to enlist may
do so at eighteen.
A register is kept of ail the youths
who reach tin* age of twenty in the
particular year. Men under live feet
two inches in height are exempt from
service, as well, of course, as ihose
who suffer from natural iniirmities
which render them unsuitable for ac
Other men are also exempt if they
have helpless dependents thus the
only sou of a widow or of a disabled
father, the latter category also includ
ing the only spa of a father who is
above seventy years of age. Then the
eldest of a family of orphans is ex
empt, and in the ease of two sous only
one is liabl \ there being various other
The term served by the conscript is
one of twenty-tive years, three years
being spent in ttie regular army, six
and one-half in the army reserve, six
in the territorial army and the re
maining nine and a half years in the
territorial reserve, all liability to serv
ice ceasing at forty-tive.
The service is frequently so hated
that all manner of methods are adopt
ed in order to avoid it. In many
cases substitutes are provided hv the
wealthy, though there are strlugent
regulations with regard to the pro
vision of the substitutes.
In most European countries military
malingering in order to avoid compul
sory military service has reached the
stage of a fine art. In fact, a formida
ble list of new crimes has been added
to the statutes as a result, and medical
men frequ* r itly have to suffer for their
assistance in this particular kind of
Thus some time ago a number of
Cologne doctors were arrested upon a
charge of having administered pills to
young conscripts. These pills consist
ed of drugs which produced the symp
toms of heart disease so effectively as
completely to deceive the military au
thorities. with the result that the con
scripts were declared untit for service.
In this case the fraud was brought to
light by on of the couscripts dying as
a result of an overdose of the medi
lu Germany, where the conscript Is
frequently treated with the greatest
harshness, there are very few towns
where there are not specialists whose
living depends solely iu inducing such
a condition of affairs as will reuder
young meu exempt by reason of untit-
In the French army it is quite com
mon for youths to feign all manner of
ills, deafness being the usual ailment
trusted to in order to escape the serv
ice. Asa result the military doctors
hare made an especial study of meth
ods of detecting feigned deafness and
to trap the cunning youth who acts
the part of a deaf man.
Another common practice in France
is to tamper with the eyesight, though
this frequently results in permanent
injury. For instance, short sight is
produced by wearing powerful con
cave glasses for a considerable time
despite the risk of bringing about per
manent blindness it is no uncom
mon occurrence for men to commit sui
cide rather than submit to forced serv
ice in the army.
In eastern Europe most brutal meth
ods are adopted by parents in order
that their sons may be able to work
for them instead of serving in the
army. The boys nre frequently ill
treated, and it is not at all uncommon
even for their limbs to be broken or
their sight to be destroyed in order to
prevent any likelihood of their having
to become soldiers.
Switzerland probably has the cheap
est army and the least burdensome
methods of conscription, the service
being much lighter thau hi the other
confThentaf armies Indeed, the con
script in the infantry army has to un
dergo actual training for only IMA days
during tin* entire period of his service.
How the Standard of Measurement
it is most difficult for many persons
to remember the sizes of their differ
ent articles of wearing apparel. Col
lars. shirts and gloves are easy enough,
because in the ease of these it is a
matter of actual inches. Hut the hat
and shoe numbers are what puzzle
most people, to say nothing of the
mystery why a No. 11 stocking goes
with a No. S shoe.
This last puzzle Is. however, easily
explained. Stockings have always
been measured by tne inch from heel
to toe*, but the numbering of sh s
was fixed a long time ago by a French
The Frenchman permanently fixe!
the numlnws of shoes for all Europe
and America. lie arbitrarily decided
thap no human foot could possibly be
smaller than three and seven-eighth
incites So, calling this point zero, he
allowed one-third of an inch to a size
•and accordingly built up his settle, it
follows therefrom that a man cannot
line! out the number of his own shoe
unless he be tin expert arithmetician.
Even then he is likely to go wrong,
because till the shoe experts allow for
the weight of the individual and the
build of his foot before they try to
determine what size shoe ho ought to
As far as women’s shoes are con
cerned the problem is still more* diffi
cult, because ninny of the manufac
turers instead of keeping to the regu
lar scale have marked down their
numbers one or two sizes in order to
capture easily Mattered customers. Fur
this reason most dealers ask out of
town customers to send an old shoe
with their orders.
The system of measuring hats is
much simpler. Any man can tell what
size he wears simply by adding the
width and length of the inner brim
and then dividing by two Orders can
also be sent to thp shopkeeper by
stating the circumference of the head
When "Fluck” Was Slang.
The word •pluck" affords an in
stance of the way in which slang
words in the course of time become
adopted into current English. We now
meet with "pluck" and "plucky" as
the recognized equivalents "f "cour
age” and ••courageous." An entry in Sh
Waller Scott’s “Journal" shows that
In 1.X27 the word had not yet lost Its
iow character. He says (volume 2.
pag-* 3()i. "Want of that article black
guardly called pluck." Its origin is
obvious. From curly times the heart
has been popularly regarded ns the
seat of courage. Now. when a butcher
lays open a carcass he divides the
great vessels of the heart, cuts
through the windpipe and then plucks
out together the united heart and
lungs—lights, be culls them—and he
terms Ihe united mass "the pluck.”--
London Notes and (Queries.
Joe Miller Wee Not a Joker.
Joe Miller, who is generally believed
to have been the soul of wit. never
made a single joke in his life. He was
an actor and so grave iu manner as
to become the butt of other people’s
hilarity. When any witticism went
the round Miller was accused of Its
authorship, and he would never deny
it. He lived an exemplary life and
died universally respected. But no
soonfr was he dead tbitu apfieared
"Joe Miller’s Jests; or. The Wits’ \ ade
Mecum.” compiled by "Elijah Jenkins.
Esq."—that Is to say. forged b.V John
Mottley. the Jacobite, just as years be
fore Hobson’s "Polly Peacbum" and
Ben Johnson's "Jests” had been forged.
The Masculine Wig.
Civilization has to thank the French
revolution and the subsequent wars
for masculine emancipation from the
wig. It whs partly the scarcity ot
f!t>ur and the war tax on hair powder
that banished the powdered wig. but
partly also the leveling influence ot
Jacobinism "1 do not know the pres
ent generation by sight.” wrote Wal
pole in 1791, complaining that the
young men "In their dirty shirts and
shaggy hair have leveled nobility as
much as the nobility in France have."
Hazel, aged seven, while feeding the
cat at the dinner table was reproved
by her father, who told her that the
cat must wait until later, whereupon
the small girl wept and said:
"I think it is a shame just because
she Is a poor dumb animal to treat her
like a hired girl."—Harper’s Magazine.
But Did She?
“My head aches awfully." slie sigh
ed "If you weren’t here I’d take tny
hair off and rest it.”
“What?" he cried.
“I mean down.” she corrected.—New
The corruption of the best becomes
the worst.—Latin Proverb.
need to be
to- know that
is “The Shoe of
why more of them
are worn by men
than any other $5
“A KNIGHT FOR A DAY”
In “A Knight For A Day,” due
here Wednesday, Dec. 32, at The
Lyric Theater, a small town express
man by mistake, delivers a case of
champagne to a self-appointed
steward lie encounters on the
grounds of a young ladies’ boarding
school. The confidence man is his
eagerness to boar away his sparkl*
ing prize, accidentally drops the
wine down a well, where the bottles
break and the nectar changes the
water A simple slave attached to
the college, drinks from the well
unwittingly and, of course, become
intoxicated. The inebriation scene
is said to be one of the most deli
date, yet convieing manifestations
of feminine exbiliration yet offered
on the stage. Reports say that
audiences in Chicago, New York
and Boston have laughed im
moderately for three or four minutes
steadily over the maid’s plight.
This is B. C. Whitney’s stupen
duous production, which, under
direction of Ben Falk, this season
played New York with the same
east and chorus that comes here. ,
Owing to ill health I am closing
up my affairs, and this is to notify
all parties indebted to me either by
note or account that I must have an
immediate settlement. You can
find your note or account either at
my place of business or at Smith it
A. D. Chandler.
Truth and trouble play no fa