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About Crawfordville democrat. (Crawfordville, Ga.) 1881-1893 | View Entire Issue (April 20, 1883)
iUi . CRAWFORDVIULE - - GEORGIA. GENERAL NEWS. The females outnumber tin* males in Alabama by 17,247. There are over ICO varieties of timber in Murray county, Ga. There are 60,000 orange trees at Bay fit. Louis, Mississippi. There will soon be three cotton-seed oil mills in and around Cheraw, Ala. From one acre of long staple cotton in Rankin county, Misussippi, Mr. \V. "Waddell realized $230. The Bin. Hill residence in Athens fJa,, which some time since sold 'or §6, 000, is now held at $12,000. A young lady near Baiabridge, Obi., has about four acres in onions and ex poets to realize f 1,500 on the crop, The number of leering ' orange trees Ilalilftx fnlimated .. . , at nn river, js 300,0 u, New groves are being planted nil the time. A bill withdrawing all public lands in the fcltate from sale or lease for two years is to be ihtroduced into the Texas Legislature. The Key West sponge fleet, number¬ ing 70 vessels and about 600 men, is out on a cruise. A large catch of sponge brings about }100,000 into that city. The entire police force of Birming¬ ham, Ala., have demanded higher wages, and refuted to work. They are being paid $60 per month in city script, dis¬ counted twenty per cent. Almost within sight of the Court house at Mi nti 'idlo, Fla., there are 300 acres of watermelons and 00 acres in potatoes. These crops are estimated to bring ihe producers $20,000. The North Carolina State Board of Agriculture have decided to make a full display of Suite products at the fair of the New l.'mrland Mechanic’s Institute, at Boston, in September next. An am¬ ple appropriation will be made to secure an admirable display. There is talk in Georgia of purchasing Liberty Hall, Alexander Stephen’s late resident';’, by voluntary contributions, and retain in it the famous rolling chair and other relics, making it a peculiar pilgrim shrine for the people of the State, especially the young It is also suggested that the r*tate make wmuleq slatue ....___.•i.ufpior to a of the late governor, seated in a roller chair, for Georgia's contribution to the Katfonol Capitol. The Charleston News and Courier states that South Carolina phosphates are In demand in almost every market, and South Carolina fertilizers are pro¬ nounced by progresjivc fanners to he the cheapest and at the same time the m st valuable commercial manures that can be used in the cultivation of our various crops. More than $3,000,000 are invested iu the manufacture of fertil¬ izers in that State, and a very large cap ital is also employed in the mining of phosphate reck. The great bulk of the jug ware used in the South is manufactured above Ath¬ ens, where clay especially adapted to this purpose is found. It is taken from the banks of streams and all the work done by hand, A man can manufacture nbout 100 gallons a day, but a one-leged jug-maker in Jackson county easily put up 2'H) gallons. The clay is first ground, every lump carefully weighed, whin the vessels ar? formed around a revolving wheel turned by the foot. They are then baked in furnaces and g’azed with glasi. They sell for about four cents a gallon at the works. The story is told that some distance down the Georgia railroad, not far from Augusta, a case was before a Justice, ami an Augusta lawyer was one of the attorneys employed. The lawyer, hav¬ ing all the facts snd the law that he desired iu the case, made little or no a'gument before the Justice, but to his utter astonish meat the case was decided against him. After court was over the lawyer went to the Justice privately ami a*ked him how in the name 1 common sense he could decide that o.\-o as he did. He simply replied : “ Well now , air, we Justices know a great deal more about these eases than is ever brought up before the court. M inigomery, Ala., has the following manufactories now iu operation: Two oil mills, on? fi 'tiring mill, one cott* n mill, two-planing mills, four grist mills two ice manufactories, two candy * fac , tones . two soda , water manufactories, . ii two carriage manufactories, one ture manufact rv, one broom m.muf .c tory, one tinware manufactory, on clothing manufactory, one wagon man¬ ufactory, one cipar manuf t uv, one fertilizer work?, one iron works, two sna ble work two railroad machine tho; ?, one railroad car work i, one gin and machine works, one rotten compress, one oil refinery, two iron foundries, four printing houses, four brick yards, I lie above makes a total of 44 establish ments in operation, which is a i dr ex Idiot for a city comparatively unknown as a manufacturing point. Double Consdottaitesf. The disappearance of the Rev. John Marsland, of Windham County, Connecti rut, and his explanation when he was found at Binghamton, N. Y., 400 miles away from his residence, that all that had happened in the interval was a 1 dank to him, -brings up the mooted question whether there is or is not such a disease as double consciousness. Many skeptics is aver that such a condition of mind impossible, hut several physicians of this city and Paris declare that the diag¬ nosis of this mental disorder is well de¬ fined. Hammond, Dr. William A. of New York city, being asked his opinion on the subject doubt said: that amnesia, double “No or chronic consciousness, exists in both a and acute form. It is something more than absent mindedness or temporary insanity. I have da.-;lifted it a" a mild form of epilepsy. Many / cases have come atom in Ygo mercantile util ^t^iishnient, who left his office o’clock to get a signature whose place to a of paper bum from a gentleman only few minufcea walk. t)«8b waB distant a jf e } ia< i no f returned at 3 o’clock, and, as wnB subsequently ascertained, visited tlio office and obtained the signature, and left, apparently in good health, at till He did not appear at his own office neai ly 5 o’clock. The last thing he recol Iected was passing fit. I’niiTs church, at the corner of Broadway and Vcsey street. It was fuiliHequently found lie had gone to Brooklyn, visited a newspaper office there, mni purchased a newspaper. Ho then returned to New York, got into au omnibus at Fultcn fi rry, left, it at tho eon) el of Twenty-third street, entered tho Fifth Avenue Hotel, and while there recovered recollection. “An even more interesting ease oc cmr <1 in the autumn of J-s'Jj. A patient, who was a manufacturer, left his office at 8 a. m. to buy some bulbs. Ho re¬ mained away eight days, and no trace was obtained of him during that time. Subsequently it was ascertained that he bud been to' theaters, anil hotels, where he slept, and stores where he made purchases, and that he made n journey of 101 ) miles from New York. Losing his ticket he was put off at away station, anil, returning to New York, passed tho night at a hotel, and on the eighth day, at about 10 o’clock, made his appearance atliis office. Hq had no recollection of what and occurred, had drank though nothing lie i^ted intoxicating coher¬ ently glass of ale, which he had with except a in restaurant Sixth Bomo < (voters a on ftvenuo. ” Dr. Hammond’s daughter has com¬ pleted a novel entitled “Mr. Perkin's Daughter,” which has been accepted by G. P. Putnam’s Sons. Tho plot turns upon the idea of a double consciousness. ■■ The heroine, while in tho “second state,” engages herself to he married, and when she recovers her normal condition lias forgotten all about, that, The publishers lmvu induced Dr. Hammond to writs a 1 IKt'liny if u) double -'"1'..'! consciousness -»>.*■» v is 'non < recog¬ nized by the medical profession.— Min¬ neapolis Tribune. A Knotty Problem. It, was a severe retort; and yet a mer¬ ited reproof for a piece of uncalled-for asperity and uukiuduess, if not of down¬ right. indecency. tlio small cabin of river They were in a ferryboat. Two young ladies sat to¬ gether, one of whom had just had an ftmhrotypo likeness, or miniature, of herself taken, which she w as exhibiting to lier companion. She was an ordinary appearing girl- she of the nmbrotype —with one exception: she had a very largo nose—an enormous nose for such a face. < >n tho scat opposite sat a middle-aged, fatherly-looking man, to whom an am brotypr was something mnv. His garb and general appearance bespoke a man of ef the rural district. As the owner tlio picture was about to put it aw ay, this man put out his hand, and asked if lie might ho permitted to look at “that ore The piettir?” girl looked at him indignantly. “What is inv picture to you ?" she re¬ torted, angrily. “Just you mind your own business!” For a moment the man was as one thunderstruck; then he seemed hurt, and pained; and. finally his honest face was stamped with disgust. After a time ha caught the gaze of the damsel fixed upon him as though half ashamed of herself; but she would not break tho silence. He, however, ven¬ tured : “You’ll pardon me, miss; but I had a particular reason for wanting to sec that ere nietnr o' yonrn.” “Well," sniffed the girl, with a de¬ termined effort to maintain lier assumed dignity, “what might that particular reason have been ?" “Wal—it might a' been'a good many things; but really I was curious made to see how in tho world the man 'at the pictnr ever contrived to get that nose on to so small a plate!” boat touched the At that moment the lauding, and tho countryman picked up i,i s bundle, bow, d politely and moved at the ehok ing, quivering damsel, on. The Kind Father. A man went to a doctor ami told him : “ Doctor tluw is something the mat¬ ter with my brain. After any St 4 vo iv mental exertion 1 have headache. What is the The remedy best remedy for it?” “ is to get yonrsclt elected to the Legislature, where voti will have occasion to think.” ’ no Tb'H’fjcnt replied if it wasn't for ‘he sake Ins cunuivn ho would make the experiment. life He didn't want th-m to go through with a stigma attached to their nanu s. Wiu ram ravens caw, swallows faces,” .-in /. IV * n;, ‘ £ ' •• i ; l V. Ill g, ■' nu iv t . n.d. The roas i- |. a . j jeico ;.t TOPICS *F THE DAT. T[IR largefit a:tl ~,T D the Eu gli„hnavy a million a quarter to build, nearly a thousand dollars a day to keep them at sea^terward, English railrof’ls liavo paid, since over $5,00d,kj0 in damages for personal injuriesh passengers. Inl87C, §1,435,000 were prid in this way. > The estimated e<penses of the Gov¬ ernment for 18 I iff )placed at $310,280,- 162. The amount of import duties is estimated at $235,WK»,000, and of inter¬ nal revenue at $1 ti,000,000. - » ----- AIiss Mary A. H Gay, who was prom¬ inently instiumentt] in establishing the Confederate Soldi', W Cemetery at I rank iin, Teen., has no??undertaken the task of raising money TV a monument to the late Senator HU),; G. orgin. The charge for tUrd class passengers per mile on tby railways of India has been reduced to. 'it one half cent. The result has be> a large increase in traffic, the pooiof'G .sses availing them .elves more gem-?Sj|| Crn^ijs of the railw ays. New York 2,000 rag-pickers, whose collection ! outvalued at $750,000 per year, while the Sandeartsengaged in the same business:^gather $3,000,000 worth. The entity ‘rudeof the coun¬ try roaches about- <,000,000 annually. Children born W* ro the marriage of their parents cm n e, inherit proper y unless by will, according to a statute ex¬ isting in New York. A different law prevails in Penns^, tfjM, where the suh sequeut marriage of heir parents legit i uiat izes tho ehildren. — Ir is estimated th < the wheat crop of ;ho present year iir United States will f ill below that fei 1882 by at least 50,600,000 bushels. Such of the wheat throughout the Northwest and West ia reported to bo wint • silled by tho ex¬ ceptionally cold wearier. —........ m ■<» .........— William P. Alt.f* and Horace E. Jones, of Caribou, e,, liavo bought 10,000 acres of land in Aroostook Coun¬ ty, in that State. This land will bo set¬ tled by immigrants l orn Sweden, and a now town will he oganized that will probably be named S ockholm. The Treasury - v * Department , "^r< i " - has made contracts for the establishment of cattle quarantine stations at lialtimore, Boston, Portland, and New Ytjk. It is the pur pose of tho departmeir.to put a thorough system of cattle qr.annline into opera¬ tion at tlio earliest practicable day. Philadelphia is T. ioicing in the suc¬ cessful opening a!” cable motor rail - way, a substitute,^ o ii >rse railway, and regarded iw 1 .greeahle enlis t'tut % ” *' * rui{. JC oable -t tntt r®l r - u miles per hour. 1 « At a wood cutting C4«ntest in McKean County, I’ii., a few dayi ago, two women won tho first prize for crosscut sawing, the contestants working in pairs. It' women really desire to compete with men in industrial pursuits, here is a field they may occupy, and no man will molest them. Investigation shows that in Utah the Mormon Church has 120,000 members, iu the Western States and Territories about 80,000, aud iu the Sandwich Islands about 7,000. It lias about ninety churches iu Great Britain, and the de¬ nomination is one of the largest in the southern part of Wales, Dr. E. 15, Show Walter, of Mobile, Ala., has presented to tho University of Alabama his collection of fossils aud marine fresh-water shells, embracing more than one hundred thousand speci¬ mens, together with a line library of scientific works. It is said to he one of the best collections iu tho United States. John G. Whittier thinks that the old Indian policy of reservations is no longer available. “The Western tideoi immigration," he writes, “is everywhere weeping over the lines. What is need¬ ed,” he adds, “is that not only the Indian schools should he more liberally sup¬ ported, but that new ones should be opened without delay. The matter does not admit of procrastination.” Is cutting away the knolls about the old fort at Lake George. N. Y., to obtain earth aud gravel for repairing the rail¬ road embankment, the workmen lately dug into what was doubtless at one time the military burial ground. Sevan skel¬ etons were exhumed, nearly all of which bear the marks of battle. One skull lies a bullet-hole in the forehead, and when the sand was shaken from it out dropped the flattened bullet. Dr. Young, iu his work on “Malaria and its Effects,” says: “When the poison of malaria exists in the human bodv in a hidden form, it will excite f*m : complicate . disease to which . , the , any body may be deposed. It becomes a great danger wheu complicated with local affections of the lungs, heart, liver, and kidneys. The liver should pass out two and one-half pounds of bile daily. The kidneys also relieve the system of a proportionate amount of poison. J.irr. the composer, has been supposed to entertain the same enmity foe the Jews that wa- evinced by Wagner, but iu f. letter just published ia a Hungarian newspaper he denies that such is the case, and says that Meyerbeer, Heine, and other Jews were long his personal friends. He also speaks of various services that he rendered to meritorious Jewish artists, and of aid that he gave numerous Jewish benevolent institutions different , countries , . during . Lis long in public career. Thk English rate of telegraphing is to be lowered to sixpeuse for an ordinary m s sage, any distance. The motion ar ing the re*]action advisable wu> against the wishes of tbs government,hut time will undoubtedly make manifest its wisdom. Cheap telegraphing is a neces¬ sity. The English Government ia com¬ pelled to meet this need by arbitrary reductions. In this country the demand is likely to be answered by ingenious in¬ ventions, which of themselves work arev olutiou in methods of transmission and expenses of operating. Where improve¬ ments arc desired in order to cheapen the cost of a system an ounce of private en¬ terprise is worth a ton of government inertia. I)a. Wir. James, of H-rvard Univer¬ sity, has made some experiments to test tha modern tiieory of the semi circular canals of the ear, instead of being con nected with tha sense of hearing, serve to convey tho feeling of the moveaioi.v of the, head through spice, which, when iniessifi-jd, become dizziness. He sub¬ jected deaf mutes to rapid whirling. Of 518, 186 were wholly incapable of being made dizzy, 131 were made dizzy iu a very slight degree, and 199 were nor¬ mally, and in a few cases abnormally, sensitive. Of 200 students and instruc¬ tors, hut a single one proved exempt from vertigo. These results seemed to Dr. Jamas to support the theory which was the object of liis inquiry. When the new electric lights in the Big Mountain colliery, near Shenandoah, were first put in operation a few days ago, seven dazed and dazzled mules, which for five years had seen no brighter luminary than lanterns, turned tail and (led into the depths of the mine. The workmen toll interesting stories about, the habits of colliury mules, tlieir tough¬ ness, their contentment, and their total depravity. Several months ago the lower levels iu the largest colliery at St. Glair were flooded, work was stopped, and all tlio mules were hoisted to the surface. More than a dozen of them had passed eleven continuous years iu the mine, and had apparently forgotten that there was a world of grass and sun¬ shine, for wheu they were turned out to pasture they huddled together in evident alarm, and for a whole day did nothing hut gaze on earth and sky. Tiic prob¬ ability is, that they were at first blinded by the glare—a common experience with thi^r kindred under similar circum stances. Just as they were beginning to enjoy their new life work was resumed «*£ i .itlwqfr, uwsLri r* their old home in the darkness. Voting Qualifications in the State of Rhode Island. The franchise in Rhode Island not being very well understood by the gen¬ eral public, the following explanation of the matter is made as brief and sueeiuct as possible: There are two classes of voters in Rhode Island, property and registry voters. Both can vote for all general officers. Mayors and general city officers, and Presidential Electors, hut only property voters can ballot for mem¬ ber's of City Councils in cities, tho idea governing this latter franchise being that only property-holders can have an inter¬ est 'in the question of taxation. Qualifi¬ cations of voters are distinct. First, natives of tlio United States can become registry voters by a residence of two years in the State and six months in the town; or they become property and owning voters by a residence of one year $134 value of real estate. Second, those born in foreigu countries must be naturalized, must live one year in the State, and must own $134 worth of real estate iu all cases. They cannot become registry owning voters, nor voters iu any way, except by real estate, but when made voters by owning such real estate, thev vote for officers of everv kind. It is this naturalized imperative clause, that iu Rhode Island citizens must own real estate to the value of $1)4, which qualifications i-s not generally for known. registry Be¬ sides the voters, these persons must have their names duly entered in the registry list before the end of December of the preceding year, aud must pay $1 registry fee before the 10th day of January of the year iu which they intend to vote. Reg¬ istry voters of American birth can be¬ come property voters by real paying personal. a tax on $134 worth of property, property, or real Mon native born, without or personal, may be taxed for a nominal sum of $300 personal property, so called, and thus become property voters. At cioinc witn *i no 111. “ I always feel at homo with Miss H-says her admiring friend, “ be¬ cause she is so frank aud simple in her manner—so interested iu what you say to her.” Who has not met with individ¬ uals of this kind, whose faces would be a passport to any society, aud whose man¬ ners, the unstudied and spontaneous ex¬ pressions of their inner selves, make them welcome wherever they go, and at¬ tract unbounded confidence toward them in whatever they undertake? have nothing They are frank, because they their to eon ceal; affable, because nature over flows with benevolence ; unflurried, be cause they dread nothing; within always them- at home, because they carry itsc-.t selves that which can trust any where and everywhere—purity health. Such of soul with fullness of are our hest guarantees for feeling at home in all society to which duty takes us. and in every occupation upon which ,. it obliges us to enter. also , They v, least no are embar- ■■ .*st j for r.isseJ ttiom-elv by VS rtaint: are tue j nno< -. A Kentucky murder*r Jug his way out *-f jail il with the sOffit meat J he lad be cn given for supper. Wanted It Just Eight. “ How much trill tin's cost in your he paper handed ?” asked a quiet-looking advertise¬ man, as in the following ment at the counting-room: ‘• Smith-Busted a trace, in this city, Friday, wife just after dinner, Mary Smith, of of the undersigned, and daughter old Sim Pratt, the leading blacksmith of Denver, Col. The corpse was highly respected by the high-tonedest families, but death got the drop on her, and she took the un-bucket with perfect conti dence that she would have a square show the other side of the divide. Tne plant transpires this afternoon at her boarding house on Willow street. Come one, come all* - Dearest Marv, them has left u*, For y,m ou carta there wasn’t room; B aV 1 ?* heaven that ’if* Ana matched our danmg up the flume. , “Denver papers please copy and send bill, or draw at sight. “ By don’t her late husband, P. Smith.” “ I believe you want it in just thatway, bing do you ?” asked the clerk rub his chin dubiously. quiet “Why not, stranger?” asked the man. “ It don’t read quite right, does it?” asked th-j clerk. “ Was you acquainted with the corpse, stranger?” demanded the quiet man. Mas you aware m the lamented whhe she was busarng around m society down m, that l.ioardiag-uoiise? i ( !on . know that I ever met lier, responded, me clerk. bo I reckoned, Jedge. _ You ^ wasn t up to the deceased when she was in the living busmess. .Now, Jcdge, the de ceased wrote that oration herself afore she died, and 1 want it in. Do you hook oi' ‘“But partner?” it isn’t our style of notice,” oh iected the clerk “Nor mine, neither,” acquiesced the quiet man. “i was for having a picture of her and a lot more talk, but she said she wanted it quiet and modest, so she whooped Ys-iY”’''” that up. Say, stranger*, i>L is it go s. know,” “ “ I don’t said the clerk, dole fully. Tins celebration “I know, partner. comes off to-morrow afternoon, and that’s going in in the morning, if it goes in out of a cannon. I got grief enough on my hands now, stranger, without erecting a fort on the sidewalk, but, if you want war, I got the implements right in the back part of these mourn ing clothes. What d’ye think, Jedge ?” “ Does it make any difference where it goes ?” asked the clerk. “I want it in the paper,” said the mourner, “ and it’s going in if it takes a spile-driver. Think you twig my racket, stranger?” replied the I’ll “All right,” ‘Salad,’ clerk. other “ put it in the among mournful remarks. Four dollars, please.” “That’s business,” and the* quiet man paid the money. “If you ain’t busy come around to-morrow. I’m going to give the old woman a good send-off, and if that gospeller don’t work up a pretty good programme before he gets to the doxology, his ioffs \ull think lie s been doing considerable business with a saw null, ohe was a good one, Jedge, and she was pious irom the 1 .a,-a of lier neck to the bunion on her heel ; you can .ell -thatf^mi the note, ; r .,ayd the mourn and, later m ■ a* the day V’"” was hued 810 for thrashing the undertaker who had put silver handles on the casket, instead ot gold. Jhooklyn Joan e. An Ungallant Translator. In a review of Professor Blackie’s translation of Faust the Saturday Ha view says: closing “ Will it be believed that the words— Pas Uubc cltreibliclie Put ist v-*- yUraw, 1 >.r Ewiv-Wc blithe Zeiht uns hinau— Are presented by linn to the Ihiglish reader thus: Beauty immortal The rapt hpirit nails, Where the eternal!y Ft inale prevails. Of course translation is baffled here; but only total want of sympathy could ena hie a scholar of Professor Blackie’s abil¬ ity to turn out such a carrieature, even by way of incidental illustration. Bay¬ ard Taylor's— Tfcc Inilfscriliable, Here ti* done; leadeth The V* oman-Soul U3 Upward «nd ' ni¬ ls nt least in the right direction toward the movement and spirit of the original. just . the finer „ spirit . .. and , And it is move ment that, even where no ism sy mpathy with his author. Professor Blac.no does not always preserve. A Remedy for Diphtheria. A lady living in Williamsburg Les sent the following remedy for diphtheria adding to the Brooklyn Board of Health, that slie had used it with success with lier six children: “Take a slice of fat bacon—side meat—the older the better; sew it on a soft piece of flannel; then saturate it with coal (petroleum) oil. Placo it on the neck, having the meat reach from ear to ear. After pounding several raw onions into a poultice place enough of the same into the patient’s stockings to cover the soles of the feet, and have tho patient put the stockings on. The poultice must be warm in order not to chill the gargled patient. with Tho throat should then be some toma¬ to catsup; strong with red pepper, salt, and vinegar shaken well together will do. If the patient is too young to gargle wet the throat with a'few drops. If vomit¬ ing occurs, lime water purchased at be a drug store with directions should given. Be sure to cause irritation on the neck.” Dry Perfumes, Dry perfumes are simply sweet-smell j n g gums, anil resins, and herbs, pow Jered or ground up together. They f orm incense, used for burning in Cath olic churches, aud satehet powders, sold perfumers for laying in ladies’ fco Xt , s ali j drawers, where’ handkerchiefs an) j gloves are kept, and which thus be¬ come pea-fumed and fragrant, It is said that to him who goes to law n j ne t ’ u ; u; r S ai- e requisite. In the first - goo d deal of money; 2d, a good 4th, deal good of patience; 5th, 3d, good a good counsel; cause ; a evidence attorney; 7th, 6th, good good ; a good jury; Sth, a Judge ; and 9th, good luck. TITII AND POINT. —A great modiste issued the follow* ing directions for wearing a bonnet new style of head-gear: ‘‘With this the ? loa;h ls ' vorn sll S htl 7 °P en - —A writer on subjects of science says that as a fertilizer an inch of bor.e is worth an inch of roses. One shad ought to produce a mile of bloom.— N. F. Herald, ------- — _A Hartford architect says “the best) tire-escape is a cool head.” We'd like to see that architect letting himself down from a sixth story window on a cool head .—Boston Tost. first-class, —“Otway, perished a dramatic , with . poet hunger.” . of . the What became of the third class poets in Otway’s day is not stated, 7 but they J - fired _ were Probably , wall.—A from „ a mortar , against a stone orrtstoum Herald. i . —A seven-year older, with the pun¬ ster’s mark on his brow, at dinner, asked his mother what was iu a jar on the table. “Pickles, my son,” was the reply. little “Then, mamma, please pickle . one out for me,” came with stun ning force from the child, and the I mother fell over a chair and fainted.— Detroit Free Press. —If you want to find a logician, go If t0 y01 , r tailor. The other day one of I there fractions of the human family Was overheard to remark: “I never ask a gentleman for money.’’ “Bat suppose he doesn't pay youthen?” Well, if he doesn’t pay me within a reasonable time, 1 conclude he is not a gentleman 1, —and then I ask liim .”—The Judge . —A . drank . Bowery whisky ... man some in Yor] f iast f° ek ’ a “ d turned ia , eight fire alarm* before he recovered, asking J. dre n 0, de j° P,f fli y Uaent box A° Y io{t pU , l a out note the co “®> the P Y l j VY'" °“ °T fire k ?T bave Y suecessfuUy Yw" )u j' P. oIlc r ? t0 ° ^ vlant f to allow lt f » h *• .. —“IIow can I leave you, my darling?’ 4 murmured a Toledo lover in tones of distressing tenderness, as he observed pcndicular both hands of the clock dial. approach “Well, John,” a per-, on the responded the girl with wicked itino eence, “you can take your choice. If you go through the hall you will bd liable to wake up father, aim if you leave by way of the back shed you’ll be likely to wake up the dog.’ Exchange . —A Chicago paper says that a printer in that city has been cured by prayer. It does not say what the printer was cured of. If lie was cured of extracting the word in a paragraph on which a joke hinges, and substituCsg he a word it, of his own “to make sense,’’ as puts we will indorse the prayer cure, an.d _ w give it a five-inch electro ad. free, one' year, top column, next to reading mat ter. All omissions and wrong insertions to bo made good at end of contract.— * Texas Siftings. . _ Tho on ly j way J hi3 to deal with a liar What ia / / to beat !ml al own a- lime . started this who item had was been reading Europe, about an 4 American to an' who was telling f a friend who knew he r? u aboU t h s trip ^ith iU)ro88 the Atlar' c3 nd h oa the cf the / m „ thBV cr-wmtered a swarm f \ u'Is'ckri.Wmery s\ ^ canvas off the ship.” The- an\ looked thoughtfuUy a moment, guel he said hesi t ating i y . «*Y e s: I net the same swarm of locusts the day, the 2Gth. Every locust had on pair of canvas pants.” The first lia v/ent around the comer and. kicked, him¬ self.— Peck's Sun. The Duke of Connaught and the Irish* man. All classes in Ireland are fond of grandeur and circumstance, and the es¬ tablishment of a royal residence there would have a most beneficial effect. i During tho stay of the Duke of Con¬ naught in the country, he was, as usual, very affable, and won golden opinions among rich and poor. I was told that, one day when he was standing at the door of a hotel, a tatterdemalion, / came up to him, and with native assur¬ ance called out: “ Welcome to Ireland, your Royal Highness! I hope I see your Highness well.” “Quite well. I am much obliged to you,” replied the Duke. “ And your royal mother, theQueen?” continued the man. “ I hope she is also enjoying good health?” “ Yes, thank you,” returned the Duke; v the Queen is very well.” “I am glad to hear it, your Royal Highness. And how are your royal brothers ?” “ Get along there, fellow !” said one of the aides-de camp, who happened to come up at that moment. “ What are you interfering with me for, sir?” retorted the tatterdemalion, much affronted. “ Don’t you see that I am houlding a conversation with liia Royal Highness T’—London Society. Lentous as a System Renovator. The way to get the better of a bilious system without blue pill or quinine is to take the juice of one, two oi three or more lemons, as the appetite craves, in as much ice-water as makes it pleasant to drink without sugar, before going to bed. In the morning on rising or at least half an hour before breakfast, take I the juice of one lemon in a goblet of water. This will clear the system of Inv¬ mors alid bile, with mild efficacr, with¬ out any of the weakening effects of calo¬ mel or Congress water. People should not irritate the stomach by eating lem¬ ons clear ; the powerful acid of the juice, duces which is inflammation almost corrosive, after infallibly pro! | properly diluted, that it a does while, hut burn the throat, so not draw or it does its full medi¬ cal work without harm, and wheu the stomach is clear of food, has abundant opportunity oughly. to work on the system thor¬ An Irishman applied to an overseer* cf a ship-yard to be put- on a job. He was informed that his request eould not ( be complied with ; but, as Pat continued. 1 to gaze at an anchor which was lying in th vicinity, the foreman repeated his reply that there was no work for him, and advised him to go away. “ Divil a bit will I stir, sorr, till I see the- man that's going to use that pick ! ” i 9
