Newspaper Page Text
THE JOKERS’ BUDGET.
WHAT WE FIND IN THE HUMOROUS
PAPERS.
glad to see him.
A young man in a far Western town
met a lady on the street who was
from the same Fastern town he was,
bnt who had never treated him very cor¬
dially at home. 1 She was glad to see
him, and rushed at him with:
“How do you do? I’m awful glad to
pee you. When did you come ? How
are all the folks?”
‘ ‘Very well, thank you. I came in-”
“Well, I’m so glad to see you,” she
interrupted impetuously. “You know,
I never knew you very well in S---, but
I get so homesick out* here that I’m glad
to dear see old even place.”— a dog, if it comes from the
Drummer.
HAD TO GO ON.
In the panicky days of 1872 a Balti¬
morean went to a trusted friend anj
asked his advice in regard to failing,
and affecting a cheap settlement with
his creditors.
“What are your liabilities ?” wuc
no Iresr?
“About $2,000.”
“And your assets ?”
“Oh, I’m worth about $50,000.”
“And how much do you hope to beal
your creditors out of ?”
“Well, perhaps twelve hundred.”
“My dear sir, you are next door to si
business idiot! Where you heat you?
creditors out of twelve hundred the la¬
yers will beat you out of twenty-four.
You have started altogether wrong.
You should be worth $2,000 and be in
debt $50,000. Let this be a solemn
warning never to do such a foolish thing
again. No, sir, you can’t fail. Go
back to the business and pay dollar foi
dollar, and it will serve you just right,
too.”
The dealer followed the advice, and
it wasn’t until last year that he could
bring a failure around and settle foi
twelve cents on the dollar.— Wall Street
News.
A. SINGULAR EXPRESS PACKAGE.
A lady who was waiting for a package
in the freight department of the Ameri¬
can Express office sat down on some boxes
arid carelessly rested one arm on an ex¬
press package close by. In a few mo¬
ments something warm and soft touched thrill.
her arm, causing a very curious
She looked into the box through a nar¬
row crack and saw two bright eyes,
when she appealed to one of the men:
“There’s something alive in there,”
she suggested.
“I guess not,” said the man going on
with his work.
The next moment a little, feeble wail
came from the box.
“Good gracious, it’s a baby,” cried
the alarmed woman, “and it will surely
smother!”
Several employees gathered around the
box, and on inspecting the aperture bright they
could distinctly see the eyes
and small pathetic face of a deserted in¬
fant. Humanity is ever uppermost.
Some of the men were fathers. They
could not stand this cruel abuse of help¬
less offspring, and one indignant African man
tore off the cover, and—a small
monkey, billed to the German bird-store,
weight five centsjpieaped pounds, express charge heads sev
enty-fivo over their
and curved itself defiantly on a pile of
boxes. Tableau on the lady’s part.
Monkey baby caged and delivered on
Saturday .—Detroit Post.
A DIFFERENCE.
An administrator who, in winding up
the estate of a deceased friend, inserted
a notice in a newspaper, to the effect
that all who had accounts with the late
Colonel Burkle, must come and settle,
or legal steps would be taken to enforce
such settlement. The next day a man
called around and said:
“I am glad that you printed that
warning, for I don’t want to go to
law.”
“You are an honest man,” replied the
administrator.
“Yes, I hope so. I owed the colonel
twenty dollars.” receipt ?”
“Shall I write you a
“No, not yet. The colonel, as this
note will show, owed me forty I don’t dollars.
Give me twenty dollars, as waut
to be drawn into law.”
“Give you twenty dollars !” exclaimed
the administrator. “Do you take me
for a fool? The business of an admin¬
istrator is to collect debts, and not to pay
them. ”—A rkynsas Traveler.
the guards.
While the Governor’s Horse Guards
were drilling up and down Alabama
street a short time ago, an old negro
man asked another what they were.
“Dey is de Gubner’s Hoss Guards,”
answered the darky. “De what?”
queried the first speaker again. “De
Gubner’s Hoss Guards,” sharply 1” began camt
the reply. “Lawd a massy the
old darky, “who’d a tliunk poor ole
Marse Jim Boynton had hosses ’nuff fer
ter keep all dem men busy gnardin’
dem. 1 don’t beleeb it, nudder, kase
dar’s Marise Glenn in dat gang, an’ T
knows he ain’t got so po’ dat he haf ter
Ink arter hosses fer a livin’.” W T itk a
look of contempt on his smutty face, the
second speaker left the old man withont
explaining it to him .—Georgia Major.
HE'D LIKE TO KNOW, TOO.
A sailor who thought he had beer
cheated by a second-hand clothier in
Buffalo, returned with the garment and
demanded his money. When this was
refused, he shouted out:
“I’ll raise a row with some of yon
ixere ¥*
“Veil, who shall it be ?”
“I want to see the party who owns
this store.”
“So do I.”
“Where is he?”
“Dot’s vhat I’d like to know mj-self.
You see, my frent, my uncle Isaac first
opened dis sthore, und he failed und as¬
signed.' Den my fadder-law he runs it
und burns oudt, und shlips off to New
York. Den my brudder Moses runs it
und pays ten cents on der dollar. Den
mv wife goes into peeshness und makes
me agent, und skust vhen I feels dot I
haf scooped her oat of eafery shilling,
along comes her cousin mit a chattel
mortgage on der last old coat. If you
can tell me who owns dis place I like would to
gif you such a suit of clothes ash
make a king feel stuck up all oafer. ”—
Wall Street News.
NOT SO SALT TO* THERE.
A good story is told of an elderly gen
deman who has been visiting in Bangor
for some time past, says the Commer¬
cial. He had been observed every
pleasant afternoon sitting near the
string Railroad piece of the lower Maine Central
fl^ wharf, taking in the whole of
^ re soutliwester_ which usually
ruffles the Penobscot in summer, and
^ , a -M a ste .... vedore lounged up, and ,
biting off a piece . of “pig-tail, asked
confidentially:
“Waitin’ for some craft a-comin’ on
this breeze ?”
“No,” answered the visitor.
“Gut a vessil in the tier ?”
“Oh, dear! no.”
“P’raps yer wan ter ship ?”
“Heavens, no ! I’m not a sailor.
“Like ter hang up round their dock,
bey ?”
“ v Yes,” " answered the visitor, enthu¬
siastically, “I do rtke to sit here and
breath the cool salt air as it comes rush
in from the sea. ”
“The stevedore threw away his cud,
put his hands in his pockets and bent a
look of mingled pity and contempt on
the stranger, as he said:
“Salt! There ain’t no salt wind up
here. Why they fill bilers sis miles
below Bangor. ”
And thus another bright fancy was
stepped on.
HE WORKED BY THE DAY.
A Detroiter who was taking a newly
arrived Englishman around town the
other day happened to pass a carpenter
shop, and the Englishman remarked
that he had always heard that American
workmen were rather slovenly and care¬
less.
“We will go in and see,” was the
reply, and they entered and sat down to
wait for the boss. The carpenter was
using his brace and bit to bore holes in
a frame of some sort, and after each
hole was bored he had to insert a wood¬
en wedge. When he had bored a hole
lie would walk off two feet and hang up
his brace, which would be wanted again
in about two minutes. After whittling
out each wedge he would turn and place
his knife on the shelf, and every time
he wanted his hammer it was on the
bench six feet away.
“Ah! I find I was sadly mistaken,”
said the Englishman as they finally de¬
parted. that had
“Why, man as much order
and system as any workman I ever saw'
in England. He must have occupied
four-fifths of his time walking tools.” back and
forth for and with his
“Yes, he was working by the day,
you see !’’ explained the citizen as they
walked on .—Dree Press.
“Doctor, do -you believe in spiritual¬
ism?” “No, naturally.’ What would be¬
come of me if the dead came back ?”
A REMARKABLE TRIAL.
A Noted Frencliiimii !in« Hts Friglitlul
Crime.
The most remarkable trial of modern
times is now in progress in Paris. The
Marquis de Rays and seventeen aceom
plices are on trial for manslaughter and
fraud.
The Marquis advertised six years ago
that he owned the i-laud of Port Bretoo
in the Pacific, ai d was ready to sell lands
to colonists. Maps of the island, rival¬
ing those of Eden shown to Martin
Ghuzzlewitz, were mi-pared, civilized and repre¬ and
sented Port Breton as a
flourishing place, with public buildings,
theatres, and everything else adapted to
make a French colonist contented. Tho
Marquis announced that he intended to
people his island exclusively with French
Legitimists, for whose piety and
tion to Henri V. he had the most un
limited reverence. Such a colony would
command the approbation of liis alleged
Majesty, and were France to continue tf
reject him, the King would probably faith- go
to Port Breton and reign over bis
ini colonists.
The Marquis’s scheme was warmly
supported by the Legitimist papers. No
less than 700,000 hectares of land were
sold, although the island contains only
7,000. Money was also lavishly sub
scribed for fitting out shipsi to CGnrc?
emigrauts, and this money, exclusive ol
t-hat received from the sale ot land, is said.
to have amounted to 5,000,000f. Four
ships were sent out laden with emigrants
to the Pacific, and, although complaints and
were made that the ships were old
unseaworthy, no French newspaper and
no French Government officer had any
doubt that Port Breton was already in¬
habited by French settlers imrl that the
scheme of the Marquis was k bona fide
one. The colonists sent out by the Mar¬
quis suffered terrible from lack of food
on the passage, and those who finally
reached Port Breton found that it was a
wildtmess infested with bloodthirsty
savages. In a short time 250 colonists
-lied of fever and starvation; 5 were cap¬
ture!! and eaten by the natives, and only
ill,out 100 escaped to reach an inhabited
-onntry. guilt of the Marquis de Rays
Of the
and those associated with him there can
he no doubt. He knew that his whole
scheme was a fraudulent one. Probably
he imagined that most of his victims
would be drowned in consequence of the
unseaworthy character of the ships in
which he had sent them to sea, and that
if any of them did reach Port Breton
they would starve to death before any
means of escaping could reach them,
rlis crime was not manslaughter, but
wholesale and deli Iterate murder, and
no punishment that he can receive
meet his deserts.
His Ulster.—L ord Wolseley traveled
in the Duke of Edinburgh’s suite to the
coronation of the Czar in his ordinary
attire, and the astonishment ol the
Russians was intense when they learned
that the quiet looking man in the gray
Ulster was the victor of Tel-el-Kebir. It
seems to have been in the midst of
so much splendor a capital advertise
mem. Like the Frenchman whose rib
bonless buttonhole made him distin¬
guished, Lord Wolseley’s ulster marked
him out for special observation where a
blazing uniform would have been lost in
| crowd of similar trappings.
A Los Angeles rancher has raised a
pumpkin so large that his two children
use a half each Tor a cradle. This may
seem very wonderful in the rural dis¬
tricts, but in any city three or four full
grown policemen have been found asleep
on a single beat.
The Young Men of the South.
I have visited no town in the South,
says M. Quad, without with making it a
special point to sit down represen¬
tative young men, to ask about them,
and to "inquire visited of almost their past and town future. and
I have every
city in nine Southern States, and yet I
never saw a quarrel between young men;
never saw one arrested; near heard one
speak disrespectfully of the North, and
never saw but two the worse for liquor.
On the contrary, I have found them
everywhere as at Vicksburg. They they may
drink a glass of beer with you, and
would certainly rescent an insult, but to
tiud an idler or peace-disturber among
them is a rare thing.
In a city like Vicksburg the poorer
class of young men are the bone and sinew
of the mills and factories; the educated
class are in stores and offices, just be¬
ginning law, or medicine—agents, travel¬
ers and speculators. It is wonderful
how many young men are managers of
mills and factories, and in positions of
responsibility, They remember that
the war impoverished the country and
made it necessary for them to go to
work. Whatever the struggle w r as and in
the beginning, it was over long ago,
the young men of the South neither
dread work nor hold labor in con¬
tempt. thing find idler, it is
It is a rare to an
just as rare to find a young man who will
admit that he is discouraged. He bring, has
great faith in what the future will
and he has the pluck to face all disasters
of the present. While he cannot make
a living as easily as his father did, he
will make it, and feel a pride in having
the talent and muscle to enable him to
do so. To know him is to like him. He
is courteous, gentlemanly, honorable and
big-hearted, and it is the young man
whose enthusiasm is making the whole
South boom as never before.
An Editor’s Joke.
Oakey Hall tells the following story
of Mayor Harper, of New York city.
The Mayor, he says, was a advocate
of temperance. While in office his pub¬
lishing firm was issuing a book on Texas
travel, by George W. Kendall, founder
of the New Orleans Picayune. One
morning Kendall, who was a famous
joker, called to see Mayor Harper at the
City Hall, and found him engaged with
a committee of a Hechabite Temperance the
Union. Kendall put his head in
door and said: “Sorry you are little engaged
Mayor, and can’t keep that ap¬
pointment with me at tho Americar.
Hotel bar; but come over as soon as you
can and I will keep the mint juleps
cold.” So saying he vanished, leaving
the ladies of the committee looking
daggers at the Mayor, who infelicitous
ly ’said: “Oh, that is my friend Ken¬
dall, of New Orleans. There was no
appointment, and I never drink mint
juleps.” Tho ladies coughed and grew and
more ‘daggery,” for the manner
method of Kendall had been very natu¬
ral and sincere.
Notice in a Hoboken ferryboat. “The
seats in this cabin are reserved for ladies.
Gentlemen are requested not to occupy
them until the ladies are seated. ’
It may be remarked, for the comfort of hon
esr poverty, that avarice reigns most in
who have hut few goo qualities to recommend
them. This is a weed that will grow only in
barren soil.—[Hughes.
Alderman remit, John rat e Baxter, ‘* ‘° ‘ he loronto, , Can- , ,
ada, avers that St. Jacobs Oil will pone
trate to the bone to drive out pain. /
know it, for I have tried, it; it hits the
mark every time.
A natural rancid, oil, cleanly, that is one penetrating, that will not that be
come one one
combines all these qualities is Carboline, the
most elegant hair-dresser and restorer. Try
*
........... ..
Pedantry erams our ears with learned lumber
and takes out our brains to make room for it.
—[Colton.____
Enrich and revitalize the blood by using
Brown’s Iron Bitters.
Silence never shows itself to so great an ad
vantage j as when it is made the reply to calum
n y an( defamation.—[Addison,
Charlottesville, President People’s Va.— Mr. C. H. Hrt
man, of the Bank, testi¬
fies to the value o£ Brown’s Iron Bitters for
relieving indigestion.
Deference s the mont delicate, the most in¬
direct and the most elegant of all compliments.
[Shenstone. ___
“I Marianna, consider Fla —Dr. Theo. West, says:
Brown’s Iron Bitters the best
tonic that is Bold.”
The greatest happiness of this life is to be
thoroughly resigned to provid nee, a resigna¬
tion which constitutes the true reposer of life.
’ adikk’ it children’s boots A shoes cannot ran
over if Lyon’s Patent Heel Stiffeners are used.
It should seem that indolencfe itself would
incline a person to he honest, as it requires
infinitely greater pains and contrivance to he a
knave.
Read This.
The Army and Navy Liniment takes the
soreness out of spavin, ringbone, splint or
curb, colic, and arrests their growth. Cures
scratches and other diseases. Good
for man or beast For sale by aB druggists.
A w oman should never accept a lover with
ou the consent of her heart, nor a husband
without the consent of her judgment.
“J wouldn't he without Dr. Benson's Celery
arid Chamomile neuralgia Pills if they cost $1 a pill.
They cured me of of .9 years' sland
iifft . 1 '—Joseph Snyder, I'axions, Fa. GQcte.
per box at druggists.
Cheerfulness in large i oses is the best medi¬
cine one can take along in his out-door tramps.
Dr. Benson’s Skin Cure is without a i«-er.
It consists of both external and internal
treatment and costs only $1 at druggists.
Good is never more effectually performed
than when it is produced by small degrees.
Mrs. Harriet Cummings, of Cincinnati, Ohio,
writes: Early last winter my daughter was at¬
tacked with a severe cold which settled on her
lungs. We tried several medicines, but none of
which seemed to do her any good, she con¬
tinued to get worse, and finally raised Urge
amounts of bkssl from her lungs. We called
in a family physician, hut he failed to do her
any good. We then called in a physician—a
most skillful professor in one of our colleges—
he said that she could not get well. At this
time a friend who ad teen cured by Dr. Wm.
Hall’s Balsam for the Lungs, advised me to
give it a trial. We then got a bottle, and be¬
fore she had used it all up she began to improve
and by the ase ot three bottles she was entirely
cured.
ON Till ;{TY HATS’ TRIAL.
- TheYot/tai <• 1'v.uxCo.. Marshall,Mich,
will send Dr. Dye's Celebrated Electro*
Voltaic Holts mid Electric Appliances on
trial for thirty ilavs to men (young and
old) who are afflicted with nervous debil¬
ity, lost vitality and kindred troubles,
guaranteeing ration health s reedv and and complete resto¬
dress of above. X. manly vigor. is incur¬ Ad¬
as B.—No risk
red, as thirty days’ trial is allowed.
A knight of the razor—Saturday night.
(Interim'.
Bailies are particularly ladle, recommended to
try Gastkine for hi a nausea, etc. All
druggists.
Whatever is becoming is honest, and what¬
ever is hone st must a lways be becoming.
IIknseMan’s peptonized beei tonic, the
< nly preparation of beef containing its en¬
tire nutritious properties. It contains blood
making, force-generating and life-sustain¬
ing properties; invaluable for indigestion,
dyspepsia, forms nervous prostration, and all
bled conditions, of general debility whether ; a'so, in result all enfee¬
the of ex¬
haustion, nervous prostration, over-work or
acute diseases, particularly if resulting from
pulmonary Co., Proprietors, complaints. Caswell, Hazard &
N. Y, 8old by druggists.
A dark horse—The nightmare.
Dr. Stites, Brooklyn, N. Y., was cured by Dr
Elmore’s Ilheunnitine-Gimtaline of very severe
Rheumatism and kidney disease of several
year’s standing, after trying everything else
without benefit.
One of the best stops for a hand-organ is a
pewter dime.
Our Brat Families.
I have been troubled for over six years with
of a severe the kidney complaint, also a weakness
urinary organs, with its attendant
troubles. My water needed constant atten¬
tion, some days as many as twenty times,
with severe pains in the bladder, as woll as
in the baok and loins. At times I passed a
limited quantity of urine, highly colored with
unnatural heat and sediment; frequently
evacuations would he very painful. I con¬
cluded that I must do something for it, fear¬
ing that more serious trouble would follow.
I went to the druggist and was recommended
to use Hunt’s Remedy, as it had been used
with wonderful success in several severe cases
of dropsy and kidney and bladder affections
here in Bangor. I concluded to try it, and
before I had used one bottle found it was
helping me beyond my expectations. My
water,became sediment, more natural, less color and
the pains in back and that heavy
feeling gone, with a general toning up of the
system; and I continued to use it until I used
six bottles, and it has completely cured mo.
Others of my family have used Hunt’s
Remedy do with hesitate equally mb good sucoess, and
we not to recommend it far and
near, believing it a duty as well as a pleasure
to recommend so good a medicine as Hunt’s
Remedy. You are at liberty to give my
testimony Ossington, to the public. I). T. Hodopkn.
Me., May 19,1883.
I indorse the above statement.
A. M. Robinson, Jr.,
Apothecary. Bangor, Me.
There is no evil wc cannot cither face or fiv
from, hut the consciousness of duty disregard¬
ed.—[Webster.
,WTW— _ |
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Hostetter’s Stom¬
IID^ 1 ach BitterB, vital by in¬
creasing rendering pow¬
il^ 9 er, the and physical func¬
tions regular and the
active, keeps Rood
system in work¬
ing order, and pro
____ tects it against constipa- dis
~r ease. For
A tion. dyspepsia and
jp B liver complaint, kidney ner- and
vousness.
r •' rhevrmatic invaluable ailment*, and it
I" it is
~ affords sure defence
a
against malarial fe
vers, besides removing suchi^
all traoea of
biffins eaee from the sj*t€ui.
For sale b> all
dniggiate and deal¬
er* generally
Saint Join’s Acadeiy
A Military School al Alexandria, Vn.
TJIITY-FIB.ST YEAR BEGINS SEPTEMBER
J 3d. Board and Tuition, tc-n montha, ifaOO.
Send tor catalogue to
KICIIAItI> I..CARNK, A. II., IVincipol.
MILL & FACTORY SUPPLIES
OF ALL KINDS. BELTING, HOSE
and PACKING, OILS, PUMPS ALL
KINDS, IRON PIPE, FITTINGS,
BRASS GOODS, STEAM GAUGES,
ENGiNE GOVERNORS, &c. Sendfor
Price-list. W. H. DILLINGHAM & CO
421 Main Street, LOUISVILLE, KY.
A_. KmtnoUf* ( of Dm Press,
The B“-t ar.d <... : u [»• r. Prci-.H
made. Costs Jess than shelter
over other pieti-i B. Hu ndrt to*.
m in actual use at both Htea m un nri
«horse Dowerfrin <. Makes heavy
|S H /hales by hand faster than any
eva J Kin can pick.. The nevv irnpr • -
merits in (tin houses described
in the wot ni» of then investor*
PR free to all. Addr»;v- ItOANTKE
r=W| Iron Works, Koanokk CBattap. Cot <>n
=ag JUMP T< nn., or •T TON
PliESbCo.. Rich .Sq-narc, N. O.
AGENTS WANTED
ting .TTaehlne ever invented. WU 1 km f, a pan . - f ■*,,<
ings will with aL IIKEIj andTOI, variety <*<miplf*ttr in ii i xnr ;
It knit a Kreat of fancy wojK. -r< i ,
W 103Tkkmoxt tWombiJv Stbkkt. '’KMrforti s-ON, JIAf u ■ i. •;
CO.. B<
|| fl AND WHISKEY HABITS OUKKO
In Three Weeks
III ^ & * V AIa. Iff address For phjunpijj*-rt. in con.ider.ee, proof* with and ‘‘A. t«raw,
W. ATIjANTA. €. BELLAMY, ga. 31. 7>t Huoai>
Or. LaFIEUS’ FRENCH MOUSTACHE VIGOR
CT I G0 pM Grows » beard on tbe toe* in 20 days «r
roonej refunded. Never foils. Beaten receipt
tL, stamps or silver; S psekaces for |i. B►•areof > be* p
JS Sl /f iBalfations; Address. T.VT. zone RAXK.lx other genuine. 22. Wires. Pend •ad w. In for to cir: r t.A. Ufor.
x
COD 0 A WEEK in your own town. Terms a
*5 Otttttlree.Addre H-Uallett k Oa.I'orUaicJ JK
fCi, 19 Mfl per free. day iAilrem'SiLuaos at home. Samples worth *5
,d «4U kO>.. rortUn-j.
A GENTS WANTED f rt i< m il •
JEm Pictori*I Books a ad Bib I >- Fhcrh r <1 ; < <
cent. Nationa j> PublibhaNg Co An «nt a t
A^IC H.EMAS BhTI.YESI COLLEGE, 7Sf-wark, N. J. Trtr. /
PgsitioOitfor g r adaitty-B. Writ*: f >r »;.f ■c tai *1%.
THE GREAT GERMAN
REMEDY
FOR PAIN.
Itelievt'S and euros
HIIEUMATI.SM,
Neuralgia,
o: “-' > '
HEADACHE, TOOTHACHE,
SCtlE THROAT.
QUIfWV. SVVKLhlNGS,
s;l>2[ A g NN.
Soreness. Cuts, Bruises,
FIIONTHITES,
flMI.YS, M AL1W,
And all other bodily aches
and pains.
FIFTY CENTS fl BOTTLE.
fcoldbyall Directions nruKglstsnnil in
Dealers. 11
languages. |7
The Charles A. Vogeler Co.
(Sucoesflors (o A. VOGKLER h CO.)
llallinline, 91(1., 1 • H. A.
A
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MACH’liNE: &BR0THER-. iY
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A-NiS
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■Appir
im 00 m m
i
m m Kit
1 *
ill: mm
Vftn [•]
«e; 111 1
m - •::&.....
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Cured Painlessly.
The Medioiue sold for n am*11 umrftio *bi D 4’.OWl i
compounding. fcion.” Forti.il Ail portioul cmi «a ttv-atafi fUlllnTl l*> r pe¬ I cinl ►ii prern’r *i
ars m*< ci-v
OR. S. B. GBLLUr, La Perl ,
GEORGIA MILITARY ACADEMY.
8AVANN \H. G \.
NOORPO Major RATED R. .1. BHHUKHH, AND GOVERNED Siiiii rintJ’ndjmt. BY A
JLboard I of tniHteep. A thorough i'tid practical oourmo
of instruction. A full discipline. corps of able And miMirpafisod exparicnoad
professors. liealthfillness. Strict and mupuifteeut Location buildings
tor New m
tho course of erection. Largo and beautiful suburban
grounds This school adjoining thoroughly one of the equipped loveluv.t parks hi in the respect. south.
is every
Session ulars sent begins application. October Gill. Catalogue with full partic¬
on
< oi.i.i di: of
PHYSICIANS ftNO SURGEONS
is \i/ri tioin:. mil
Tlio practical advnnt.agcM of Inin pcho-il nro un»ur
nasHed. Clinics hold at City IloHpital, Matornitonnd
this Maryland school. Woman's Physiological Howpital, and nil Chemical of which Laboratory belong to
Work reqnired of every Student. Apply for » cat-aloguo
to Dll . THOMAS OPIE, 1) an. 'ill N. Carey struct.
,- piso s ■cwfsMw&m,
<0 fURES WHCZE All USE FAUX. E|
0^ Bust Cough Syrup. Tsja*. pei.wl.
Uo« In time. Horn >*y dniRfftoto. EH
.CON: --~aBSDaBES3yS
ELMORES/ II. C3. !■ the quickest, pleasantest,
A/QUn. -/vC, eflrust hver, stoQpncIi, and best remedy bladder lor and kidney, blood
\v" diseases, and only d cu-alive ever
r
discovered for neuto lumbago, and <hronic
(Tahk, rheumatism, neuralgia, gout, Huh stint, hop',
tea, etc. cn el
less forms cases of rheumatic Bright’s disease digurders ana dyspepsia 2 to 12 weeks—reliovt» in M week —all
in
inflammatory in 1 day. Can refer to huudrt d t of lelliu
Me people botanic, cured who had tried in vain everythin ? else.
Purely harmless, and nice to Irink. Auk yo I r
drugpiat to get it; if he declines send to us for it tl a
nothing else, Elmore, Adams A Oo.. 105 William st., N.Y
5-TOM
on trial. WarrauU S y«*r«. Ali tan «a iww*
lP«r freo a«ldr««a
j«a of fiiKCHAwren, Y.€
«IS(4U4|TOR. 11
rn p| CKIOdSwQC? §\/<£LXi£f uC,
4 Kv'A'.t isi’CiS.,
~ noTTOq BCAM &. FRAME,$40,
y. a«i« ’ l "”“ on PORtf U hh *'■ bizm. S3, " ' li^'eJi'tueBMSTlW TOOLS,
a, Ao.
H 3 liCST I-IIUUH ‘in-mmii WI UK POlt KKurTouU.lt l.llillT lVO!!K, -. J
-I 1 4 vlh. Join
l Viinm-i-s-.it— II,Mnd miin.jr iliiltt. 01W .
( —L t Htnwr-'-H. nvll-. Vi.Oihur Artich
il unU'.-il ITUUKB, V, lUU.USlI.K MUKtUt
nannsro ijD®
IRON WORKS.
D. A. MI-1,AM'., *>lHunger.
if* O Box iCqo New Orleans, La
Manufacturers Platform COTTON of lleynolds’ PK1CMKKH, f telehra>
ted Bt«a«
8team, 11 and A Horse Power.
Kngfnes, Sogur Mills, and lp.'ilding tbog*
Fatunt Dr* <!%'•• i-oat Work,
Fronts, (Jobinns, Kiiilings. Black
BinUlinu: sod VlHiftilne Work
tei.I M'TTKb M>
ff J)l 79 A VVEKK. $12 a day at home easily rrmdc.
icusllyeutfltfree. AddrnwTrua I 1 O 0 . S uviin.-i M.
FREE Band to INOOItK'M
BtSIMNS CSIVKRMTT, (da.
.tllantu.
,A »r ribmtFRtffi 0 \rctiu ~U. your
BAD, BAD, BAD BLOOD.
Some blood is bad because it is poor and weak. Some is bnd because
it it contains does impurities. poison the mosquitoes Some men who have such bad bite blood them. that the wonder i,
not come to
The rich red color of good blood is owing to the iron which is present
Blood which has not enough iron in it is always unsatisfactory. The pei
son in whose veins it circulates cannot be said to enjoy good health.
The efforts of expert chemists to produce a preparation of iron whf h
can be assimilated with the blood have resulted in that perfect preparation,
which is an important part of Brown’s Iron Bitters. It is the only one
which freely enters into the blood. It is the only one which accomplishes
the desired good. thin blood
Weak, poo % may be madcrich and strong, and impure
blood Bitters. may be purified by the use of l!ia‘. Great Iron Medicine, Brown's
Iron * a
? TH9¥Z+§§OQE&MP.
PIONEER ‘ MACHINE WORKS,
_ __A___7-_£9YFEQBLQE;_§I&___
SOMETHING
EVERY LADY
OUGHT TO KNOW B
There exists a means of se¬
curing a soil, and brilliant
Complexion, no matter how
poor it may naturally be.
Hagan's Magnolia Halm is a
delicate and harmless arti¬
cle, which instantly Tan, Redness, removes
Freckles, Roughness, Eruptions, Vul¬
gar Flushings, ere., etc. So
delicate and natural are its
effects that its use is not
suspected by anybody. the right to
3So lady disfigured has face in
present society when a the Magnolia
Balm is sold by ail druggists
for 75 cents.
The superior merits of the
watches having Stevens’ Patent
improvements by are acknowledged
every person wearing them.
Railroad men, and others re¬
quiring great accuracy in time
pieces, endorse them, and we
are prepared to shew by incon¬
testable proof, that no other
watch not having these improve¬
ments will produce such accu¬
rate results in time keeping.
They are durable, dust-proof,
and reliable, and considering
quality, the cheapest watch in
the market. Send for our illus¬
trated catalogue and prices.
J. P.STEVENS WATCH 00.,
Atlanta, Ga.
1st ms nml <*aln.
CHAPTER I.
** 1 w><* tliken *iek » year ago
VI ith biiiouu lever.”
“My doctor pronounced mo cured, bnt 1
qot sick again, with terrible pi.iim in tuj.
lin'd? and s des, and I got bo bad I
Could not- move!
I shrunk!
From 228 lbs. to 120! I bud been doctoring
lor my livor, but it did me no goad. 1 did
not expect to live more than Ihruo months. I
began to use Hop Bitters. Directly my appe¬
tite retrrued, my pains left mo, my entire
system seemed renewed as if by magic, and
ufter using several bottles I am not only as
sound as a sovereign but weigh more than I
did before. To Hop Bitters I owe my life.”
Dublin, June ft, *81, R. Fitzpatrick.
CBAPlKIt II.
“ Maiden, Mats., I’VI>. i, 18HI). f/enll'Hijen—
1 mfferfd l with attaukc of Hick hni.d.i no.’’
Net ralgin, f< male trouble, for yarns in 'he
most terrible end ptcrr.c luting mam t.
No medicine or doe o- could give ine relief
- r cure unlil 1 used Hop Bitters.
I The first bottle
! Nearly cured ir:e;’’
1 The second made me as well and strong &»
when a child.
“And I have been so to this day.”
My husband wai nu invalid for twenty
years with a serious
“Kidney, liver and urinnry complaint,
“Proiionnc.i-dby Boston's best physicians—
“ Incurable!”
Seven bottles of your bitters cured him,
arid I know of the
“Lives of eight- persons"
In my neighborhood that have been saved
by your bitter...
And many mine are UBing [hem with great
benefit.
“They almost
Do miracles! ’ — Mix. A', h. Shirk.
How to (!k Kick.—E xpose yourself day
and night; eat loo much without oxeraao;
work too hard without rent; doctor all the
time; take all the vile nostrums advertised,
and then you will want to know l.ow to i/et
writ, which in answered in three words—
Take Hop Bitter !
_
A. N. U............ ......Tlilrlv-Five. ’M3
41
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