Planters' weekly. (Greenesboro' [i.e. Greensboro], Ga.) 185?-18??, April 18, 1860, Image 1
BY W.M. JEFFEJtSOX & CO.
VOLUME 3.
THE PLANTERS’ WEEKLY
PUBLISHED AT
GreenesboroL Ga.
W. M. JEFFERSON,)
ROLIN W. STEVENS. S Proprietors.
FRED. €. FULLER. )
TERMS.—TWO DOLLARS A YEAR ;
OR ONE DOLLAR AND FIFTY /
CENTS IN ADVANCE.
0 r
Bates of Advertising.
Advertisements inserted at the rate of one
dollar per square of ten lines or less, for first
and fifty cents fir each subsequent insertion,
Those not m irked with the number of inser
tions wll bo published until forbid and charg
ed at these rates.
Tue following are nor lowest contracting
It \TES:
1 Sq’r Six months 87..0ne year 312
* 11.. “ 20
2.. • 16.. •* “ 28
column 6 mo., 20.. “ “ 35
£ • 6 •• 30.. “ “ 55
3 <• 6 * 40.. “ “ 70
{ <• 6 “ 50.. “ “ 80
V-lvertiasinents from grangers and transient
parsons *.nusl be paid for in advance.
Legal Advertisements
Salt of Land or Ni-frueo, by Admluislrator*.
aotl Go irdiam, per squ-irc, |5 00
Bale ot Personal prom rty t>v Aaminiatralors,
f x-culor-i. and Guardians, per square. 3 50
Nntieo t D‘bwe ttnd Creditor*;’ 3 50
N dice for hove to Sell, * 00
CiUtion for l.ntlcr* of AdiniitUtraiinn 2 75
Oi'a'f'ti tor Dismissi m from Adntiniafratibn, 600
Citation for Dismission from On irdinnship. 3 :5
The Law of Newspapers.
J. Subscribers who Jo nut give i-xpress no
ties t.) the contrary, a e considered as wishing
to continue their subscription.
8. If subscribers order the ditcontinuance
of their newspaper, the publisher may continue
to send until all arrearages are paid.
3. If subscribers neglect or refuse to take
t dr nrwrspipera front the office to which they
ara directed, they are held respons bje until
thay have settled tho bills and ordered them
discontinued.
4. If subscribers remove to other places
without informing the publisher, ami the news
papers are sent t< the former direction, they
ara held responsible.
V The courts have decided that refusing to
take,newspapers from the office, ur removing
and leaving them uncalled for, is prima /acie
•videnco of intention il fraud.
8. The United States Courts have also, re
peatedly decided, that a Postmaster who neg
lecti to perform his duty of giving reasonable
notice, as required by the Post Office Depart
ment, of the neglect of a person to take from
tha office newspapers addressed to him, rend
ers the Postmaster liable to the publisher for
tha subscription p.ice.
CARDS. =
** J 6 H N cT RE l i)7
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
junel's9-ly. (ireenesboro, Georgia.
KOLIN W. STEVENS.
ATTORKKY AT LAW,
Greensboro’ Georgia.
WILL practice in the counties of Greene,
Baldwin, Putnam, Morgan, Oglethorpe.
Taliaforro and Hancock. [Feb. 2, 1H59-tf]
UNITED STATES HOTEL,
M No. 232. Broad Street,
AUEFSTA, GEORGIA.
DWELL & MOSIIER, Proprietors
P. DWELL | 1. MOSHER
Medical Card.
THEREBY tender my thanks to the public for kind
ly bellowing on me heretofore, a larger abare of
patronage than I anticipated, and again offer my pro
itiaionaT aerricea to any who may give me a call.
When not professionally engaged, I may be found
.at Wood'a Drug Store.
Jan. 12. 1861) It, W L BETHEA. M. D
■J. 8. ftG E LATinEK,
LUdNTISTS.
VISIT White PUius, Mount Z:on, Fort Lamar,
P.v.nel.vilit, Carnesville, Warrenton ami Ellier
• Son—l’rineii'al oflS.e at Grteneaboro. D,c, IR. ’59.
NOTICE.
DP. N. F. POWERS, having been burnt
out has had to get an office elsewhere.—
Jl* is now staying in the Brick building below
Wakefields’; but t.\p<cta soon to occupy the
house now held by Dr. ( aum.r. Ir. P. so
licits the patronagsAof th<-fce who m ty .*t,k tr,
And who aic wilting to pa.’ for it.
Greenestoro, Apni lltt, f
FKEE TKtiifE
SAILORS 7 RIGHTS
ASIIAW c. r. erie-n*. at hi. Ware room., some
• very tiaud'O.ic nrulture, aa Mlowi:
SOFAS FBOSI 891 TO $39 t
Bp* e, *l fair of Tete a-tetca, very hnndiome ; K'Vrral
CSuaeu of Malmganv Chair#, >t different patter ns:
some very haadMute Marble Top Centr> Table.; Side
Table, Qisrte'tns, Tnt Hoys, Hat Rack., Towel
Rtck*. Oak and Blaok Walnut Dining Chair*. Black
Walnut a"d Cu>lrd Uaple Parlor Chair*; W.tck H'aU
nui Bxtcnai m Table., elc., etc. Any of tb* above
•metre t | he aotd Low *n tw* caaa.
Madison, G„ Jan ISth. ISSo-lm.
■ DENTISTRY.
DR. m?i. aifoiifij.v,
Surgeon and Mechanical Dentist.
Penfeld, Georgia,
VIfODLD In loro, the c turn* of Green a tad ad
v V j.uning eoaauae. that ba u prepared to perform
•"7 operation pertaining In his profeaatoa. wilb neat
naaa and diapateh. 3a will iMart from ona >0 an so
vire Ml <tl teeth, which, tar heagty, darabllity, com
f* and uia.tieatiag, will root pare wdk My, stNrer
fa this eguniry or Rurop*. It labi* intanuou lopiaaea
Ay iik from tha auujitry that may be toed*.ad
hire wdl meat wdlh inmat attnailer |). .afere re
Or. Jkil Muephy f Korea. - feh t*. Id>
A Weekly Jeueaal—*Devetedi to Home Literatare, Agriculture, Foreign aad Domestic News, Wit, Humor, Ac,
MIEGULAN ROBS.
t A Dream.
I wandered in fbe dreamland fair,
Soft music fell upon mine ear,
Sweet flowers of beauty rich and rare.
All gave to me a mystic cheer.
1 strayed beside a streamlet bright,
Where lillies bloomed in modest ease,
I watched the fairest of the night
Float gently on the perfumed breeze.
While seated pn the brooklet’s side,
I saw a fairy form glide past.
And in her band, a wreath I spied,
’Twas held by richest jewels fast.
She lightly tripped actrss the stream
And waved her fairy hand to me ;
But, ah! I woke.it was a dream
Too bright for anglit of earth to be.
Life in Heaven.
BY MATTIE.
Lile in Heaven, 0! ’tis a theme.
Too grand for human Poets dream,
To picture or portray—
For in that life wo hath been told.
We may forevermore behold,
The. light of endless day.
Alt, there, are seen no scenes of strife,
pain—as iu the mortal life—
To bow the spirit down,
But. peace and joy and perfect health,
Beside tho glorious dazzling wreath,
Os an. immortal crown.
We there can drink in calm repose—
As from the throne of God there flows,
The everlasting stream.
There n>* to-morrow spreads its gloom,
Ol darkness o’er a single tomb,
For death is never soen.
A life in Heaven, it hath uo tide
To toss the voyager’s bark aside,
A wreck upon the shore j
Though countless years may roll along,
We still may sing tho joyous long,
Os life for evermore!
Letter from Mr. Woodpile to the Hon.
Lucius Q. €- Lamar of Mississippi.
’•So much for the great pathway on which
the Senator’s argument hangs, that the
labor of the South is all negro labor, and
that the white man must there be degraded
if he labors.
The Senator hat himself raided in a
Southern State, and therefore 1 say l be
lieve him to be better informed before he
spoke. I must suppose him to be as igno
rant as.liis speech would indicate.”
TEXAS VALLEY. f-'T
Floyd co., Ga., March 25th, 1860. J
Dear Lucius;
Seeing tho above iu the Washington
“Constitution,” which is an extract from
the speech of Senator Browu of your State,
in reply to Seward of New York, deliver
ed recently iu the U. S. Senate, calls my
attention to some events which occurred
within ray knowledge, and as 1 might say
under my nose. I’ll try and not make too
long a story of it, but as a sketch of some
of the parties concerned might not prove
uninteresting, let me start at the beginning,
and carry you back years ago to the
Devil’s Half-acre, in Putnam county,
when your nncle Billy was younger and
better looking, and your aunt Polly a
beauty, and not the old stowed monkey
she is now. We had just married—Polly
and me—and carried our duds to the Half
acre on an old crosseared, hipsbod Indian
fioncy. where we hungr out in a one per,
og cabin, with a little patch of clearing m
front about as big as a counterpane. We
had a feather bed, two hide bottom chairs,
som9 odd blue rjmmed plates, cups and
saucers, which constituted about our world
ly wealth. Just before the christmas of
onr first winter there, Sam Perkins, a
Massachusetts Yankee, came through the
settlement with a greasy bundle on his
back, peddling fire crackers. They were
anew thing at that time with us, and went
like hut cakes, and Sam sold out his whole
cargo at the Half-acre without going fur
ther. I had known him for more than a year
in Putuam and Greene, where he had been
tramping about the country, and pilfering
from everybody in such a good u&tured,
inoffensive way, as to render himself a
general favorite. So when he announced
his attention of opening a mart for the
wholesale and retail dry goods and gro
ceries, in Jim Spark’s old school house, I
was rather pleased at the idea of Sam’s
settling among us, and 1 beliere the other
neighbors weie too. Not many weeks
elapsed before Sam got his goods up from
Augusta, swejtt out the old school-house,
repaired the stick and dirt chimney and
opened his store. My memory wont bear
me out in making a schedule of his stock
in-trade, but to thele?t of my recollection ft
consisted mostly, if not entirely, of a bar
rel ot whiskey, three shuck collars, and
one solitary mackerel, slung by the tail to
• nail ou the door- Rut if the assortment
of goods was not extensive, there was fio
lack of customers, and the way the ona
pint tiu cup of the concern travelled about
from hand to baud and mouth so mouth,
kept it forever up to a state of blood heat.
Times have changed since then, Lucius.
The Half acre was then iu its glory;—we
may hare lived hard according to more
modern ideas, but we enjoyed life. We
Rapt Christmas as long as eggsand whiskey
lasted, and celebrated the fourth of Julw
GREENESBORO’, GEORGIA, WEDNESDAY MORNING, APRIL 18, 1860.
in August, when crops were laid by, and
then we went it with such a perfect loos
eness that i oason not only ‘tottered on her
throne,’ but sometimes so completely tell
off, that when we found it necesary to re
turn t. the sober realities of life again, we
had frequently lost the. day of the week
and month, and more than once entirely
forgot the year of our Lord. Those were
jolly times when we danced all night'on
puncheon floors to the music of an old fid
dle and half a dozen cow bells strung to
a boe-handle, and tho lady who sported a
pair of brogans wan the belle of tiro eve
ning.
The world, as you know Lucius, has
prospered with me since. Young Billy—
or as he styles himself William dc Wood
pile, Jr., —he gets the de on Polly’s side
who was a Doolittle—wears puuip soled
boots made by Forr, smokes cigars at six
ty dollars tbe thousand, autl has been to
Paris—my oldest daughter'tried to elope
with the clown iu Robinson & Eldred’s
menagerie, and my whole family affect all
the airs of aristocracy and fashion. My
neighbors consider me about as licit as
Charley Lamar’s bird manure, and the way
your uncle Billy lives iu a big white house
is a sight! But I regret those old times,
and my memory never reverts to the past
without feelings of emotion too big for
utterance. ‘But to return’ as chief Justice
Lumpkin said when, in announcing the
judgment of the Court in a rape case, he
slightly digressed to vindicate tbe doctrine
ofinfaut baptism. Trade thrived so brisk
ly with Sam, particularly in the Grocery
liue that he found it expedient’ to enlarge
his establishment by the addition of anoth
er pint measure and barrel of whiskey—a
Jerk also became necessary to assist in his
arduous labors, tv take charge while he
was out fishing by day, and guard the prop
erty when be was coon hunting at night.
Providence favored him by sending him a
treasure in a young man from the State
of New York, who had'just fizzled out in
the school keeping line up iu tho Alexan
der settlement.
It happened in this way : Polly and 1
were sunning ourselves in our front door
one morning, and I was greasing her heels
with melted tallow, where they hud got
cracked open from dancing ail night at
Dave Custard’s, and walking back home
three miles in the snow and sleet. I had
just found where her shins had got pretty
budly barked iu ecouing the creek on a
hickory log. and was applying the grease
when up comes a chap who looked for all
world as it he wots out in search of
journey work ns a scarecrow'. He w r as dress
ed in ragged jeans trowserg and cotton
shirt, and the latter as if not satisfied with
the very soiled aspect it presented above,
for the sole benefit and behoof of tbe pro
prietor, made a little side show on its own
account, through an aperture in the stern
of bis trowsers, in a streamer about five or
six inches long and even dirtier than the
more respectable portion above.
Good morning to you both, said he rais
ing his old bog gkiu cap. Polly jerked
down her coat tail in a jiffey and the tal
low plasters on her shins went with it. I
was equally polite and invited him in,—
but he said that qs the sun was so pleasant
he would prefer remaining outside, and
took a seat on tire tence. ‘Can you tell me,
if there is any want of a school teacher in
this neighborhood I’ he enquired. 1 an
swered, that ‘I thought not,-the last teach
er they had here is now keeping Joe Stiles’
blind stallion, and the one before him had
to give up the business from want of schol
ars, and went to beating mobby at old Tom
Lamar’s still house, and according to his
account soaked up rather more low wines
at night, than run from the still during the
day. However he’s been converted, and
is aright smart chunk of a preacher; can
snuffle through his nose like an old hand
at the bellows, and is now dealing out
particular hell every Sunday, to an assort
ed lot of souls down on Rooty creek, for two
hundred dollars a year and found, or at
about seventy-five cents a head, niggers
and children half price. He’s my wife’s
brother Zeke Doolittle—You’ve certainly
heard ot him, lot me introduce you to uty
wife Mrs. Woodpile—wh.it’s your name
sir?’ Polly smiled sweetly on him, and
bobbed so low that her frock almost hid her
feet, evety toe of wag tied up in a
separate cotton rag. He did’nt seem to
think the formality of an introduction either
necessary or desirable, but jumped Aowu
from the fence, drawed in a nose about as
thin and transparent as a piece of glue,
until I could see nothing but the gristle,
and exclaimed n>o6t scornfully, By the
powers above! 1 wish I never had struck
such a country. The very idea of an in
structor of youth descending so low from
of his profession as to beat mob
by. and guzzle warm peach brandy from a
still house spout, or what is still more de
testable to loaf around the country* dis
pensing a biiud piney-woods stud horse in
broken doses, animates me with feelings of
,‘j.to most unmitigated disgust. See here
Alt- sToodpil*—as that's your name—this
couutrv ot j ours Is going regularly to per
dition. the fate of Sodom and Gomorrah
will overtake it anct that right soon. I
have been laboring h*L re *'* months to
arouse tbe people to their dan
ger, to prevail on them to remodol their
entire body politic, to pull off their social,
efrl! end polities! breeches. inilitHtAtif
extremities in anew pair.
To talk about reforms in such a case is
simply ar. absurdity ; putrefaction has set
in and ihe whole thing is in a perfect dead
horse state of decomposition, and nothing
will answer now bat to spit on the slate,
rub tho figures out and do the sum all over
again, for there is a devil of a wrong calcu
lation some where. You will perhaps be
surprised to leant that yp to the present
moment I have met with little or no suc
cess, and I might go further and say with
truth that my expedition has resulted in
a most disastrous defeat. Where 1 fondly
anticipated the most sympathy and co-op
c-ration, I have absolutely met witlt deri
sion and contempt. I refer sir to the col
ored population—one of whom, Billy Gar
rett’s Bob, has had the insolence to dub
me Giddy-giddy-gont, an abbreviation of
which appellation still clings to me. A
more senseless set of asses I never before
met with, and if ever I get back to Goshen,
never confine my labors for the
reclamation of mankind to the immediate
vicinity of where grub and shelter is pro
vided me, and select tnv savages uearer
home. At any’ rate I will hurry away
from this rotten concern and dodge out
before tho trap falls and catches tne, for
I’ve no notion of going on a pic-nic ex
cursion to hell with any such a party. 1
shall toat the remnant of this carcass back
to Goshen and keep'it there. I’ve been
living so long on ash cake and ground pea
coffee that thauk the Lord it wont be
much of a load, and I shall therefore de
cide to take it back a-fo.ot. -Be guided by
tne my friend, and take that sore-toed wife
of yours and join me, —or leave her be
hind—just as you please—and if you have
the means to defray our expenses I will
make you prosperous and happy, among
a free and enlightened people.
I never had tpy feelings of compassion
more excited in my life; —there stood the
poor creature in the cold frosty morning
air, with his ragged shirt-tail fluttering in
the breeze, the upper leathers of his shoes
had parted company from tho soles, and
were tied togemei here and there with
btick-skiu thongs, and botween peeped out
from pach foot a bunch of rusty toes with
nails like musket flints. There is no truer
adage than that “republics are ungrateful,”
ahd the poor wretch standing before me was
a living exemplification of the fact. I
stepped into the house to have something
prepared f-,r him, but Polly was before me,
and although it could not have been more
than five minutes since she was at the door,
when I reached the fire a pot of coffee was
on the coals, anew hoe cake upon the grid
dle, and Polly busy slicing up middling to
fry. She is tho woman who hae a heart
that responds to every call of distress : the
orphans and widows are her peculiar weak
ness, and ever find in her a parent aud
friend. I dont think I ever knew her in
dignation to bo move excited than against
Judge Trinpe. Gtta had been con
victed of killing his father and mother in
one of his foolish freaks, and then setting
the house ou fire and burning them both
up in it. What, says the Judge, have you
got to spy why sentence should not be
passed on you I . Oh ! miy it please your
Honor, replies Gus—l hope yottr Honor
will take pity on a poor orphan.* But
Judge Trippe, resisted the appeal, and sen
tenced him to be bung, and bung he was,
and Polly never forgave him for it.
“Come in young man,” I said to him,
“and take a seat by the fire while my wife
prepares you some breakfast, and we can
discuss the decline and fall of Georgia, and
that trip to Goshen for tbe making of our
fortuues at our leisure.
If you did really conus oul here on a
simon p?frc moral reform trip, and did’nt
mix up au over dose of rascality with your
nauseous philanthropic nostrum, you area
great natural curiosity and Pin determined
to get a good look at you, and with that
object in view 1 intend to make Polly par
boil you and scour you thoroughly in the
big wash tub; for it is utterly impossible
to see you at all through that terrapin shell
coat of dirt. Lord! Polly, what a wind
fall he’d have been to me if 1 had’nt just
bought I bat lot of land from Henry Bran
ham. Why I’d clear him up and plant
him, and raise rutabaga tur.iipson him
four-times tbe size of Sam Perkin’s half
bushel mea -ure that holds little over a
peck. Your conversation indicates that
you have received a good education—
which is far greater good fortune than ever
befell Bill Woodpile. Why did you not
when you came among us, use it to some
purpose, shuck off your Yankee shirt, and
put on the garb of an honest, well meaning
Southern man, instoud of going ab >ut snarl
tug nut! snapping'at every tbing you met
with. From the plight you are in you must
have rendered yourself asodimts as yon
certainly are rvjtyifernus and were I dis
posed to be censorious I should express the
opinion that your moral reform idea was
au af.er thought and that you only turned
to it after a collapse in the swindling line.
Excuse me if Ido yon injustice, but we
have a good many Yankee adventurers
among us and they are not so self-denying
as to visit us with any other odject than to
indulge their natural propensity for knave
ry. When you reflect, are yon not struck
with admiration at our long suffering and
forbearance! You quarrel with your bread
and butter while you are cramming it down
yeur insatiate throats, i— to hc’l tha hand
that sustains you, while you ever crave its
favors, and t’is the case with, all of you ;
yon curse us and cheat us, damn us, de
nounce us and defraud us and prate about
philanthropy while you pick our pockets.
This with tbe efforts they are making to
cheat us out of all the Missouri Territory,
creates quite a warm cross fire upon us, and
you are certainly right about one thing, we
are in rather a blue way at tbe South.—
As for any principle they have about slave
ry or its extension, that’s all bosh, and got
up to gull fools and get votqs. Why, there
is not a man in Georgia, who will ever hire
his slave to a Yankee when he can kelp it,
and if lie does he’ll have to watch him
right close if he dont want him beat to
death.
Last court week in Greene, when a par
ty ol lawyers were discussing the admis
sion of Missouri, I came out flat footed and
told old Billy Crawford and Tom Cobb,
that it was time for us to take our pots and
skillets to ourselves and set up house keep
ing on our own hook; for there is no denying
the fact that they are a set of knaves and
lunatics, and tbe sane, honest and conser
vative portion of their people caut number
strong enough to keep the rest iu order.
However, sit down tiow and eat your
breakfast, and when you get through, Pol
ly shall get ready a pot ot hot water and
we’ll indulge you in the luxury of a clean
hide, but as tor those tots I see poking
their noses out of your shoes, I wont
promise so much for them but am rather
inclined to think that I’ll have to knock
them off with a cold chisel.’ He squatted
to tho table and tfalkeUinffi th 6 provisions
to an extent that rather alarmed me, and
did Polly's soul good to behold: coffee,
bacon, eggs, bread and milk, rolled down
his skinny neck until lie became a perfect
reservoir of eatables and drinkables. But
he got through at last, and we commenced
for a total renovation ot his
outer man. We brought in the big wash
tub and filled it with hot water and laid
in a supply of corncobs fine sand and hard
home-made soap, and although Polly was
intensely interested in the operation her
modesty would not allow her to officiate
aud consequently the scouring process de
volved ou me. After I had peeled off his
rags and got him into the tub the‘impres
sible conflict’ with free soil began, and a
tough conflict it was; but. by soaking him’
well and pursuing the course practiced in
scalding hogs, I succeeded in getting the
bulk of the dirt off and had the pleasure
of presenting him to Polly in about an
hour’s time iy an entirely new charactar.
He submitted to. tbe operation mere
quietly than I anticipated, but the fact is
be had laid in such a supply of provender
and stuffed himself so that he got
sleepy and finally snored outright, so that
during four fifths of the .operation he was
in a state of quiescent torpidity. But no
entreaties or expostulations would induce
him to have his clothes washed. I hauled
out my rather scant wardrobe, and told
him to rig himself out until Polly could
wash and patch his own, but it was like
singing psalms to a dead horse, or preach
ing honesty to a free soil Congressman,
and we had to give it up. No! exelnimpd
he in a strain of pathetic eloquence which
drew tears to Polly’s eyes, “tins shirt were
it as futal as that of Nessus, should never
leave me, and the trowsers erewhile adorn
ed these shanks in free and happy Goshen;
the incrustation upon their surface is a
portion of my childhood’s home, my na
tive soil; this—sticking his finger in tbe
hole in the stern, through which the tail
of his tunic again protruded—is the rent
Bill Garrett’s envious nigger made.”
After Polly and I bad cairied out the
tub, and poured tho liquid free soil on our
cabbage bed for manure? and she had
raked his head with a fine-tooth comb,
on tbe hearth, and swept the gross
Eroceeds into tbe fire, and I had helped
er to put things to rights and burn some
rags to lake away the smell; I asked him
to accompany me to my new ground clear
ing, where 1 was chunking up log heaps,
but he objected, and complained of being
drowsy, so I left Polly to entertain him
and went about my work.
Well Lucius, your uncle Billy with his
usual garrulity has spun out his letter to
such a length that he finds he must close
before getting through with a fourth of his
story. However, if you want to hear the
whole history say so, and you shall have
it when I can find time to write you again,
for I am very busy just now planting corn,
and although these two old paws have
raked up something of a pile for my cubs
to squander, they are not too old to labor
yet, Giddy Seward to the contrary notwith
standing. Your friend.
WM. WOODPILE.
The Battle of New Orleans. — Mr. A.
Grinevald. ot whom tho Mercury has al
| ready favorably spoken, as a portrait pain
ter, is now engaged in painting, from hit
own conception, a representation of the Bat
tle of New Orleans. The artist has chosen
this great battle for his theme, aud that
| moment when tbe British General was shot
from his horse. We enjoyed the privilege
cf seeing tbe sketch yesterday, which is to
be painted in Distemper on a canvas twen
ty ieet by ten. When completed, in tHre
| oourse of a few weeks, U will be placed on
pnMie Mhfbi'lon
Terms—sl,so Always in Advance.
“Cesspool Drains.”
The arrangement proposed of carrying
the house slops through the privy vault,
would make an intolerable nuisance. I
have tried it under very favorable circum
stances—with a fall of some twenty ieet.
Even if the solids were retained and pro
tected by some deodorizing agent, the pas
sage for the slops wonld soon become foul,
and whenever warm water was passed into
it, would send np a most offensive steam,
keeping a reeking dampness about tha
■eats.
After several experiments, I have at last
succeeded iu unexceptionable pri v y arrange
ment—-one entirely inoffensive. Under
the apartment make a wailed and cemented
cellar, say six feet deep, with a recess say
five feet square, running out on the least
exposed side of the building, aud cover
their recess with a close battened door,
lying flat, to < e raised when the callar
requires cleaning. The bottom and sides
of the vault should be thoroughly cemen
ted, that there may be no eartb to become
saturated with offensive matter. Before
it is used, cover the bottom with wood or
coal ashes, and make tbis the receptacle of
all the ashes, —wood aud coal—that are
made in tbe house. Empty no slops of
any hind into the vault, and ordiuarily you
will find the apartment as sweet as any
room in your house. Shoul i there be ia
summer a lack of ashes, a quart or two of’
flasler tlnowu in daily, will keep it right.,
t mny be cleaned nut ouce a year, and
will afford a most valuable and easily hand
ed addition to your compost heap.
Tbisariangement will often make it prac
ticable to place the privy in tha corner of
a wood-house, or barn, or even in the kitch
en wing of the dwelling house, and thus
avoid tbe always unsightly building, spe
cially appropriated.— Cor. of Country Gao
tleman.
Almost Uomr. —This is one of tbe
most joyous expressions in the English
language. Tho heart ot the long absent
husband, father, or son. not only- home
ward bound, but almost arrived, thrills with
rapturous joy as he is on the point of re
ceiving the embraces and greetings of the
dear ones at home. So it is with the aged
Christian, as, m the far advance, of his
pilgrimage, he feels that he approaches the
boundary line, and will soon crosß over to>
the land of promise. Many of his beat)
friends bare crossed over before him, and
they hare long been beckoning him upward
aud onward. They await his arrival with
the joyful welcome of holy ones. An#
as tokens multiply on either band that the
land of Beulah is near, he feels that he is
almost home. The ripe fruit of e long
Christian life is able to be gathered into the
heavenly garner. Few sights on earth are
more pleasing than aged faithful Christians,
strong iu the Lord, almost home. We
have some such Among us, revered sad
beloved, whose faces we love to see in the
sanctuary, and whose prayers bring dewn
blessings upon our heads. They speak of
many friends, most of whom have preceded
them, but the reunion will soon coins
Blessings be upon the fathers and mother*
in Zion; and may their mantles fall -n us.
Thu Terrifying Surmise. —Nothing,
save the essential troths of God’s word
can give comfort and true peace, either
living or dying. Whilst living, if men are
not resting on the word of God, they car*
at least have no rest iu denying it. The
very fear lest the Bible be true is enough
to mar all earthly enjoyment. A celebra
ted infidel said one day to a friend of his
who had imbibed the same principles.
“There is one thing that ntars all tbs
pleasures of my life.” “Indeed!” replied,
his friend, “what is that?” He answered
“l am afraid tbe Bible is true! If I could
know certainly that death is an eternal
sleep, l should be happy: my joy would
be complete ! But here is the thorn that
stings me. This is the sword that pierces
my very soul. If the Bible is true, Pam
lost forever!”
Those Broadway Belles. — Atr: Those
Evening Belles.
Those Broadway belles, those Broadway
belles,
How sweet a talo my mem’ry tells
Os hair chinois, and that dear time
When bonnets small were in their prime..
But all those bats have passed away,
And women now are most outre,
Each bonnet now preposterous swells,
And hides the pretty Broadway belie*.
Jrw —I vish you take more care uitb>
you miserable old brick; you ash spol
mine bat a’most; vby didn’t you sbtav
vere you vasb, on de island in de middle
of de ocean t
Paddy. —Bad luck to yon, and more of
the same, sure if it had net been for the
likes of yees, ve thievin’ race, the blessed’
Saviour wouia been alive to this day, end
doin’ well.
A pert young lawyer noe boasted k
an old member of the bar, that he had ra
’ ceived two hundred dellare for speaking
in a certain law-suit.
“Pooh!” replied tbe other. “T received
double that sum for keeping silent ia that
very self-same #!
NUMBER 16.