Newspaper Page Text
BY STEYEVS & FILLER.
VOLUME 3.
THE PLANTERS’ WEEKLY
PUBLISHED AT
Qreenesboro*. Cfra.
ROLIN ffi STEYE'VS. ( pi-mnrietors#
FRED. C. FULLER. \ rropneiors,.
TERMS.—TWO DOLLARS A YEAR;
OR ONE DOLLAR AND FIFTY
w- iOgNTS IN ADVANCE.
HNC. R E I D,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
jmnel’s9-ly. Qrreenoloro, Georgia.
x ROLIN w. stevens;
ATTEST AT LAW,
;r°-oVa.en;,
. X riLL nr.ct.ee in the cornu. - ,* h ’
k * Myin, Putnam lfjtn,
•MlVfi'ttJ t?4oSock - [^b.9,-18rt-,. <
casbv, oar*-' 1 * c# *
WHOLESALE DRI7£GISTb,
ANUIMrOItTSIS or
ESCUhH, FRENCH, AND GERMAN DRUGS,
0-..-irti#l*,PcifuWery t> Articlre,
aroi-iasfri, PAis'is. mi.s, va'isisum, window
oi.ass. .Ac., &e., Ac.
KN. Cop.of Light and Lombard streets,
bm.timohe.
r. V. COOX, IVav, Agt. —jly2B-tf.
6&nL
r HEREBY tender mv thanks to ‘he pa olio, for kind-
IV no loe'berciofflre, b l*r K er eliarr of
pa’.r.than 1 anticipated, and again onermy pro
fer „>al —.nic-n to any who may dir” e C “ IL
VVh tn not •.>rnf'HO‘i.il!y eojrtged, l may ba found
SSttT w L BSrHr.A, M. P.
dentistry.
|ir, jnonG't ri,
Pen/ln/tl, Georgia,
WJCI.D titidftn ‘he citizene of Greene and ad
j unS‘i,T c iuniiey.thal Ire is prepared to perform
any ..-/-ra-tO'i jTirUini'iff to Ilia prol'csaaion,witbnt
o<?jb -itd ,ii*p*t3b. H _• will inae.rt from one to an en
tire .ini of teeth. It liiliit intention to pieaae.
/ will ho in GreoHiMboro on Monday, Tuesday
aad tfoiaesday of each weeek au4 iu Fonlield the
reel .1 ider of hUtiiiic.
\*i itall from the country that may be tendered
biui will meet with prompt attention. 0’ refer* to
Q. J jfiii V!uf*otJ'V*>f —P*b. W.
CLOCKS, WATCHES
AND
J l |L B 1!
Till’ undersigned would respectfully fi
inform the citizen* of t.is we'.nity
and tho public in genera!, that ha has MM*
Uelaracd to Creencsfcoro,
and will constantly keep on hand a well selec
ted stock of
dacki, Watches db Jewelry,
and will sell lower than ever. Call in and try
bin. Clocks, ‘V’ atehes and Jewelry, also,
repaired as heretofore at the old stand.
J. P. AIIbSTBOX.
Grertienboro’, G„ Moy 31), 1860. ts.
SOUTHERN DRUG HOUSE.
f ,
SPJSiaS & SIGHT,
STILL Oet’lPY THEIR OLD STAND,
Ocimsits TEHa’ Hotel. No. Sl6,
Where they Oopptantlv keep on hand one of
THZI I.ARREST STOCKS
IX THE SOIThERX COUNTRY!
Comprising’ Every Article in the
Drug and Fancy Goods Trade,
ALL or
Which they will sell
AT NEW YORK PRICES.
Price. Before fen ttny.
• 4 .if>:, Cs„ Jan'.'iry lOih, iB6O.
- Wl-I ’ll ■ ‘ ■ LUI- ‘ ■ ■ 1 I
- $. & I/. rA ■ BJIStJX WJEMjMj,
- * VNUFACTUHEKBOF
~ Trunks *c., See
’ *i v ‘ permanently established
H th^ nß e.v: sin lh .tJ e^t n 0 ° f r / eD *
nQield. They are ‘ii. , L c 0 a
Fine MM #f MateHaiJ 1
and jvill constantly keep on hand a g'v °®
assortment of
Wiißon.Ooach and Bugsy Harness
of THEIR OWN and the NORTHERN
MAKE.
ry All JOBS put np in the most work-1
manlike rnauner of the best material
Repairing done at the shortest no
tice. * ‘ f Jan. 1. 1860-ts.
NOTICE.
I'VRN. ¥ POiVBR'j, haring been burnt
had to get aa office elsewhere.—
He is now at ying in the house formerly held
* t>7 Ur, Latimer. L'r. P. solicita the patronage
of those who in ay grant it, and who are willing
to pay for it.
GLOBE HOTEL.
ACGCSTA, GEORGIA.
JIUSTIS XICLLARKY,
PauraihTua.
* XOTICE. —
holding Through Tickets
will be carried to and from tilts Hotel free
4f Omnibus far#.
{nffUH. ©* ftept, 9*. !•*<* —I J
. A Weekly Journal;—©eveted to Etas Litorataco, Agriculture, Foreign aad Boiaestie lews, Wit, Htnaor,
New Advertisements.
REMOVAL.
WE hereby give notice to all of oar friends
and customers and the public generally, that
we have been compelled to move to
Nortons Old Stand,
(in order to avoid Litigation,) where wo ex
pect to remain until our new House is com
pleted, which we hope will be but a short
time, and in order to reduce our
Large and Complete Stock of
Fall and Winter Goods,
w§ will offer
Extra Inducements,
WeCTO determined not to be undersold by any
of our liome C* Foreign competitors, all we
ask ofany one is if’ come * n< i
EXAMINE C>UR STOCK,
we feel confident, that the inducements we
offer, cannot fail to give gener&i sJ ,; sfaction,
we offer GOOD
Goods at Low Prices,
/jar stock consists of everything usually kept
• „„ country Town, such as
in an J
Staple a',?* lancy Dry
G00D.9.,
A
Domestics of all discripticns, Cloths am” a,-
meres. Vestings, Hats and Caps, Tweeds And
Kenneys, Blankets. Ladies Gentlemen anu
Childrens shoes. Brogans Hardware, Crockery
Groceries, Yankee notions, &c. We would
call particular attention io our stock of
GEORGIA HADE GOODS ,
such as Kerseys, Tweeds, (’assurers, Sheeting
and Shirting, Osuaburgs, Wool Hats &c. We
will sell any of cur old goods, at New York
Cost without the expenses of getting them
here, call and see us, we shall charge nothing
(or showing our GOODS, but will take pleas
ure in doing so, dont buy before you examine
our atoclc. u> yon might regret it after it is too
late. Come one, Come all.
WINFIELD. JACKSON k CO.
16th Out. lbuO till 22d Aug. lSdl.
Copartnership Notice.
WE, the undersigned, having formed a co
partnership for the purpose of carrying
oh the
CLOTHaNG AND
Furnishing Goods Business,
And haYirjj bought Hf.vrv 0. Weaver's
interest in the old lirtn of Crabbe ii Weaver,
would inform our friends and the public gen
erally, that we offer
Extra Inducements
in the sale of what goods we now have on hand,
our object is to reduce the present stock, as
we intend to offer one of the
Largest and Best Stocks of
Clothing and Furnishing Goods.
ever offered to this Community, wc intend to
make this a
BUSINESS OF ITSELF,
and therefor* our stack will he complete.—
W e hope that by strict attention to busi
ness, to merit a liberal share of your patron
age. CRABBE, PORTER & CO.
B. B CRABBE, | LB. JACKSON,
J. T. PORTER, | J. W. WINEIEI.D.
August 15th, IBGO.
GUNS! GUNS!
GUNS!
* IMIE undersigned has put up a shop for the
JL purpose of Making and Repairing-
Double Guns, Rifles & Pistols.
I will do all work entrusted to me with neat
ness and dispatch, on reasonable terms, and
warrant it. BtjT’ Gire me a Call. Shop over
J. P. Aiilstroms’ Jewelry store.
IT. ‘MA RK WALTER.
<7reenesboro’, July 18, 1860. —3ni.
NEW GOODS!
nnUE subscriber hereby respectfully informs
X bis old customers and the public that he
has jusi opened an Entire new -*
STOCK OF GOODS
j* his old stand (late W. 0. Smith’s) where he
>nvite9 their attention. The Goov s consist of
Dry ufoods, Groceries, Hardware, a ) ar g e I® l
of ClothioJ. Boots, Shoes, *c. &c.,
Without fo. , !<H' rin ß the custom of publishing
my private reato.J f° r every act, I will merely
state that I can be found, that I warrant
every article offered to iC Dew, that I will sell
them of the aarae quality quantity, as low
as any one else can or will do if; *tid to one
customer as low asanother, not contracting to
sell any friend goods at cost. Call and see me
and I will be obliged.
W. GRIFFIN.
Greenesboro’ Oct. 24 1860.—2 m.
GKORCUA iUSITACTOaV
OF
SADDLES & HADNESS,
109 Broad Strict,
UNDER AUGUSTA HOTEL.
j MACHINE STRETCHED BELTING
op
Oak, llrnduck ami Rubber.
Gin Baud* of Oak. Hemlock awl Rubber.
JULIUS HARROW,
PROPRIETOR.
Q*. ftept. 88, IMA 4m.
GREENES BORO’, GEORGIA, WEDNESDAY MORNING, DECEMBER 12, 1860
New Advertisements,
aa:
NITROGEXISED SIPER-PKOSPIIATE .
i
; OF
LIME.
-iAXj.
THE undersigned, Agent for the above
Fertiliser, in consequence of its marked
success the past season, and the greatly in
creased demand arising therefrom, has made
arrangements with the manufacturer for a
targe end full supply; and requiring greater
Cicilities forstorage andotberaocommodation,
hits fatten the four story Warehouse as below,
whera he will bn able to supply any quantity
required, with promptness. He may be al
lowed to express his satisfaction in view of
the fact that of the numerous purchases made
of him by planters, generally for the purpose
of making comparative tests with other fertil
isers. not one case has come to his knowledge
where our Fertiliser has not shown a decided
superiority. Planters who have used Mapes’
| phosphate, now make it their solo reliance,
a i ■jr* ordering (so’ceof them) as much as
fifty tor for use the next season. This fact
sneaks for , w have discovered a qual
ity. devedoped in .“* andr u outh * wblo . h was before
unobserved, viz ; its byfometr.c power, or
capacity, to absorb ln .,."ure ,rom the atmos
phere, which obviated to a .Urge extent the
late unparalleled drought wherd *“ USlf!( J>
while most other fertilisers were nci, ’' n v, va ‘”
u ‘less, but positively injurious to the j. ‘ ID E
The ® nd profit as a money investment,*
* . foa the use of Mapes’ Phosphate, re
an3 ‘ , IpA .j'yvond q -tion, and (lie expert
nowpla. ‘* season, has established what
ence of the ; .^ ution< a ; sy ,. Tsi asserteo
we have, wilij.. ’■ farti |; ser Veliahle un
for .t that it H th* ‘"V -q. mo(ie of cultiva
dsr ad circumstances t ,r
tion, and of weather. . ,
The undersigned is also • “v'V
any description of AGBIOBI,.*-!'**- *
(WINERY ami IMPLEMENTS, i? f the .wg
improved patterns adapted to Souths rn co ‘-
ration, ai lowest, prices.
.J. A. QUIMBY.
No 3, Warren Block.
Augusta, Geo.
Oetidier 10 Istlo.
LEANDER C. DEMISGh
254 Broad Street 254.
UNDER GLOBE lIOTEL,
Dealer in Fancy and Dnj Goods.
I'have anything you want, and at tec
lowest prices.
Augusta, Ga., Sept. 26, 1860. lv.
NEW FALL”
DRY
GOODS,
1860.
Having received our stock of Full Dry Goods
(all of whi h are entirely new, having no old
stock on hand) we take this occasion to call
the attention of the readeis of the ‘APlanters’
Weekly j’ to our floods and prices—
QURSTGCKOF
Dress Goods,
KERSEYS AND BLANKETS,
ISOOP SKIRTS.
and all other articles in the Dry floods line is
full and complete, all of which will be sold at
pricosto suit the short crrq>3 of Cotton and
Corn. Planters will oblige us bT calling and
examining for themselves which will cost
them nothing.
KEAN t CAARK.
2nd door above Globe Coiner.
258 Broad Street-
August#, f?a. Sept.2B, 1860- — ly.
SOUTHERN RIGHTS.
MtJCII has been said of late about South
ern Rights and Southern Trade, espe
cially since the Charleston Convention,
You can now, “show your faith
•j* by your works.”
J. W. WINFIELD,
Offers for sale HARNESS of nil kinds, made in
this city, out of the best Southern material. by a
Southern man and he will give a Southern war
rantee, for all work done in his shop. lie is
prepared to make, to order, anything from a
throat-latch of a Bridle to the finest Carriage
Harness.
ftgyCall at his shoo in front end of Brother
Copolan’s Livery Stable and you will be waited
on by a Southern man. G. W. GROGAN,
reenesboro, May 15. [feb.22-ly] Agent.
TRKdOQ RE H
MARBLE WORKS,
Broad Street.
hear the-Lower , Augusta, Ga .
MARBLE MONUMENTS,
TOMBSTONES, &C.
ALSO
MARBLE MANTLES.
And Furniture work of all kinds,
From the Plainest to the most Elaborate,
Designed and furnished to order at short no
tice.
AH work for the country carefully Boxed
and forwarded.
digests, (!•*. Sept. 26, 1860, —ly.
Job Work of all
; kinds neatly done
at this office.
MUiUELLANROCS..
From the Rural New-Yorker.
Ask, Seek, Knock.
Ask and ye bliall receive, seek nnd ye
shall find, knock and it shall be opened
unto you.—Mathew 7:7.
Ask ever* for a thankful heart
For all’thy blessihgs given;
That thine heart may unceasing raise
Its grateful songs to heaven.
Ask for the promised love of God
To smooth life’s rugged way;
And that from virtue’s pleassantpaths
Thy feet ma_v never stray ;
For He hath said, ye who believe.
Ask hut oi’ine, thou shalt receive.
And seek thou for the treasures hid
Within the sacred hook,
For treasures rich and rare are stored
For all who humbly’ look;
And prayerful seek the pearl of price,
A spirit meek and pure,
Most precious in the Father’s sight;
Ills promises are sure,
That if ye seek, with earnest mind,
Eternal riches ye shall find.
At the door of th’ heavenly kingdom
knock,
In the twilight hour of life, ‘
TV. gain admittance to the blest.
To part from earthly strife,
Longing for tliy heavenly rest,
Bid sin iftid toil depart;
Reaching the gate of Paradise,
Knock with unfaltering heart; .
F>f the gentle Savior, stands
To ooi-n i£ Mth ready hands.
Geneva, Wis., iB6O. D 0. D.
THE HOLE IX THE POCKET j
or, si.” S*cret ofSacc'-ss.
Jonas Slack and his wife commenced
house-keeping, as many other young peo
nlc : ; o, witii little means for defraying the
nee-. expenses;? but as he was a good
mechanic •‘ ‘ von *d gene, ally find em
plovinent in Jds uative village, and she be
i-,ig an iiidnstriouf Jiule wolnail > besides
doing her housework, ftnied considerable
in the course of a year by t- plain sew
ii g. But still they did not bii?' a pios
per as did Ned Bowen and Ins wii£. plio
commenced housekeeping near them aloft
the same time, under similar circumstan
ces. The reason why, and the way he
made the discovery, we will let him tell in
his own words.
My wife said to me one evening, ‘‘Mr.
Black, 1 wish to get some thread and nee
dles at the store, and want a little change.”
1 felt in mv pocket, examined my wallet
thoroughly, hut could find nothing that
would pass for currency at the rdpre, am,
repoited the unpleasant fact to her.”
“Why !” said she, “what has become of
tlic half dollar I gave you this morning,
that I got from Mrs. Jones for sewing,”
(slic bad always made me cashier of tho
firm )
After anolJier unsuccessful attempt to
find it, i said:—“Mrs. Slack, I think there
must be a bole in some if my pockets, for
certainly ] Lave not got it, and I do not
think of anything 1 have paid it, out for.”
“I'll look to your pockets this evening,”
said she, mildly, “‘and mend them, if they
need it.”
it was not long after this conversation,
that I remembered having treated myself
and three friends to ice cream and ofanges
at a confectidher's shop, but concluded to
keep the discovery to myself.
“I could not find any hole in your pock
et last night,” said my wife, the next
morning, in a gentle tone, and with a look
that my feelings prevented me from scan
ning closely, and all the reply I felt will
ing to make, was, “Ah ! couldn’t you ?”
But few daysafterward,she called on nje
for twenty-five cents she had lately de
posited in my sub-treasnry for safe keep
ing. A thorough search proved unavail
ing-
“ Really, Mrs. Slack,” said I, thinking
it best to show a bold front, “there must be
some corner or seam in my nocket that is
open;” (though really I could not find one,
any more than I could the missing quar
ter.)
“If there is, it is singular I did not find
it the other evening,’’ said she, in her usual
quiet way; “but 1 will be sure to find it this
evening if there is any.”
On the way to my work after dinner,
while passing the Arcade Saloon, the fate
of my wife’s quarter came distinctly to rny
mind. It had vanished in smoke in front
of that institution, i. c., it had paid foi five
fine! y-flavorcd cigars, which some of my
village “friends” had helped me to dispose
of while discussing polities there the pre
vious evening.
Mrs. Slack never fold me whether she
found any hole in my pocket or not, and’ I
did not fool disposed to push the investiga
tion on theHubject any further at the time.
Although 1 was seldoifi entirely out of
change, still it was frequeutly unpleasantly
J scarce. In fact, 1 spent more than 1 was
teally aware of, in sw*H items from day to
day, for the double purpose of maintaining
cvy reputation of being a “clever fellow.”
j and to gratify my appetite or fancy for
; tilings I could have done very wcli uuth
-1 out.
The result was, that we did without
things at homo which my wages would
have fniltldl me to bov, and left some-
thing for charitable purposes.
One day, I was presented with a sub
scription paper for the benefit of the Or
phan Asylum, which I reluctantly handed
back without signing, with the remark that
* I really could not afford it.
My wile smiled sadly, as she said to mein
> an under tone :
| “Ned Bowen subscribed five dollars.”
“T don’t see how lie. can afford it,” I
• replied, “as he does not get any better wa
ges. or work more hours than I do.”
A few days after the foregqing event,
on an invitation fiom Ned Bowen and Ids
wife, we spent an evening at their house
which we found much better furnished
than our own, though there was no appar
ent attempt to make any needless display
of furniture.
Ihe evening passed pleasantly away,
hut J could not avoid some unpleasant
feelings, whenever I contrasted their home
with our own.
“I wonder,” said I to my wife, on onr
way home, “if Bowen does not go in debt
for some of their furniture ?”
“He does not;” she replied, “for his wife
told me that they did not owe a dollar in
the world.”
“But how can they livo as they are do
ing on his wages, if he gives five dollars .at
a time for charitable purposes 1”
“I think I can tell you,” said my wife,
in a hesitating manner.
“W ell do, if you please,” I replied, not
a little curious to know what her ideas on
the subject were.
“Well,” she continued, “in the first
place, she never buys for herself any un
neccessaiy finery, and takes good care that
nothing is lost or destroyed that comes in
to the house, nnd—”
“But, ’ said I, interrupting her, “I doubt
I amazingly whether she is more careful in
!hat respect llfan tny own model wife.”
“In the second place,” said she, ‘he is
as careful iu t lies© respects as she is. He
buys no ico cream, oranges, cigars, &o„
neither for himself nor any of his pretend
ed friends. In short, my dear Mr Slack,
lie has no hole in his pockets'.”
It was the first word of suspicion siv
wife ever uttered on the subject, and that
fact, together with the conviction that she
had clearly seen, and so unexpectedly, but
in so kind a manner, told me the real cause
of the difference between- our home and
J.'at of Ned Bowen and his wife, cut me to
the quick—or rather, I should have said,
it sewed me up, and my pockets too; they
have never had holes in since that even
ing. Her change has always been safe in
them ever since, and our home now will
not suffer any in comparison with that of
our friends the Bowens. With good books
and papers, 1 can spend, my leisure hours
more “loasautly and profitably at home
than anywhere ftfiu tie iiAYF 1 ”
small expenses more than pays for them, j
and is the secret of success.
The Way of ihe World.,
Men may swear, gamble, profane the
Sabbath, be obscene in speech aud licen
tious in conduct —they may absent them
selves from home and spend whole nights
in lasciviousness, hist, excess of wine, re
velings, banquenting, and abominable idol
atries—and yet not lose their place in
society, but be recognized as lionoiable
men. But let a woman follow their ex
ample, and she is driven, like Eve, from
the social paradise. If even the breath of
suspicion blow upon vestal robe, it is soiled.
If she lape bnt once, from the path of vir
tue, she “falls like Lucifer.” No penitence
however protracted, can replace her on the
pedestal from which she fell. No- tears
can wash away the stain upon her fair
name. You might as well attempt to re
construct a broken vase or to restore tints
and fragrance of a faded flower.
“The white snow lay
On the narrow pathway
Where the lord of the valley-crossed over
the moor,
And many a deep print
In the white snow’s tint
Showed lie tracks of Ids footsteps to Eve-
Iccn’s door.
The next Sun’s ray,
Seen melted away
Every trace on the path where the false
lord came !
But none shall see the day,
When the stain shall pass away
The stain upon the snow of fair Evcleen’s
fame. And yet that proud lord will lift
his head in society as if he were as pious
as an angel, while the victim of his hellish
.".its is, like Cain, a vagabond upon earth.
And even the virtuous woman, who would
shrink from her presence as from a pestil- ]
ence, will, give him bei hand and heart, as
if he had nevor sinned. [Philip Slaughter.
We always admire the answer of the
■oan who, when asked how old he was, an
swered, “Just forty years; but if you count
by the fun I’ve seen, I am at least eighty.”
Tho following is nn alaiming evidence
of the progress of the photographic art: — 1
A lady last week had her likeness taken
| by a photographist; and be executed it so
; well that her husband prefers it to tiie
‘ original.
“Tiihik, John, (lint’s twice you’ve
come home ami forgotten that lard ” * Ln,
mother ;it was so greasy that it slipped
my mind.’*
Terms— sl,3o Always In Advance.
WAYSIDE GLimXGS.
t ~TV ——— - =sesm
2\o ‘'AJuntlies” in Vice. — lt is idle to
talk of the vices as a sisterhood. There
may bo association, hut no affiliation.
Knaves may bo companions, but not
friends. The vain dislike the vain; tho
proud hate the proud; the covetous abhor
the covetous. But the virtuous are never
at war. The just love the just; the chaste
esteem the chaste; the Lenevolent admire
the bevolcnt. In short, all good tilings
harmonize; all bar] tilings are discordant,
both \v\th the good and with each other.
Juvenile Imagination. —There seams to
he a pretty strony tendency, in these mat
ter-of-fact days, to suppress the imagina
tive faculty in children. This is quite
wrong. The imagination is quite as legiti
mate, in its way, as any other portion of
the mental apparatus. “Facts are stub
born things,” and mere dry facts are far
too stubborn to be a wholesome pabulum
for the graceful and spiritual undeistand
ing of children. They find out, iu time,
that their dolls are only stuffed with saw
dust, and that Santa Clans is a myth. Let
them enjoy their innocent illusions, then,
while they may, and let die poetic, rather
than tli,e prosaic, side of their natures he
cultivated first.
Don t quarrel with your conscience
Own up when she accuses—lie ashamed of
your wrong doings, and reform, and thus
escape her upbraidings. It is true that
“conscience makes cowards of us all, hut
tlio fault is with ourselves, and not with
conscience. Deal justly with all hearts,
pay for your newspaper, and he assured
that conscience will permit you to sleep as
sound as when you were a nestling uti
your mother’s boson.
1 HR Marshal of Cincinnati, a few days
since received tlm following telegraphic
dispatch from Dayton. Wo hope, for the
sake of the baby-, the vrow may be caught.
“Mister Marshal, mine vrow rimed away
mit one Dutchman this morning; she has
bnt one eye, vich is black—t’other eye ish
black, too, but she lost hirn.
She’s ash pig ash a hogshead. I vant t<
ketch her in it the telegraph and send her
home to her baby, for if she don’t coins, i
vips her like ter tyvle,”
Retailing. — Paul Pry, espying a man
digging a large pit, and being'disposed to
rally him, asked him what ho was digging.
“A big hole,” was the reply.
“And what are you going to do with bUch
a big hole f”
“Going to make it into small ones, and
retail them to you to set fence
posts iu.
The fall was a step downward from hi*
nocence but also il. was a step onward—a
giant step in human progress. it inatfm
goodness possible ; for to know the evil,
and to conquer it and choose the good, is
far nobler than a state which only consists
in our ignorance of both.
“Good morning, Mr. ilenpeck, have
you got any daughters that would make a
good type setter {” -Not exactly, bnt i
have got a wife would a first-rate devil.”
A modem Munchausen, addicted to hum
ming an air beginning “Strike the lyre,
strike the lyre,” was greatly surprised
when one of his acquaintances, Inking him
at his word, knocked him down.
New Year's Cake. —l enp of butter, 1
of sugar. 1 teaspoonful of cream tartar, £
teaspoonful of soda, and caraway seeds
to the taste. Flour must- be added till the
dough is fit to roll—these require a quick
oven.
A sentimental chap intends to petit! -n to.
Congress for a grant to improve the chan
nels ot affection, so that henceforth the
course of true love may run smooth.
It takvs three editors to start a paper iiv
New Orleans—one to get killed in a duel,
one to die of yellow fever, and one to write
an obituary of the defunct two.
A hoarding-house keeper in Baltimore
advertises to “furnish gentlemen with
pleasant and comfortable rooms, also one
or two gentlemen with wives.
Dr. Franklin observed : “The eyes of •
others are the eyes that ruin us. Ifni! but
myself were blind, 1 should want neither
fine bouses nor fine furniture.”
A Boston girl writes from Niagara
Falls that the Prince of Wales has “whop
ping lag feet—that lie is short, nud don’t
look like the pictures any more than she
docs.”
It is better to he poor and honest tlun
wealthy and dishonorable.
Tho agitation of thought is the Logining
of wisdom.
Why are nil games of chess of etpial
| duration? Because it taker justyear knights
| to play every game.
“Dear Laura, when we were courting
you were very dear to me ; but now
I are my wife, and I am paying your hills,
i you seem to get dearer and dearer,”
I Htorms cleanse the atmosphere, end ihf
tempests of life purify the human lieert.
NUMBER 50-