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About The Montgomery monitor. (Mt. Vernon, Montgomery County, Ga.) 1886-current | View Entire Issue (Oct. 4, 1906)
NATURE’S FIREWORKS. An occurrence flint Im- taken place ut A mien.' hli< ■ • - that where there exists an cle trieal >■ tabli-h --ment of any size nothin/ more than a good robust th inJer-torm i mod ed for providing a display of not i.* 1 fireworks on a scale tl t leave nothing to bo desired in tin; way of largeness. Aroused by u.ia-aai noises in the factory diiricrn storm the other night, the mu r of the electrical work' at th ’ n v.a met by a wonderful 'pci ta |e on en tering the place. No artificial di |>iny ever pre ented n scene o fair - Tremendous slmwer of sparks were being given of!' from every machine in the place, while there was a deafening crackling a if from a hundred sputtering lira tea rhino man had soon hi food b rn 1 to it cinder a- lie sat to eat it, all the electric hell were -oaialin r ;. d telephone had been wrenclnd from tlie wall, 'i’he riirre t f:d to I" 1 shut off lie fore order re tored. Next day everythin;: worked ih smoothly as if there had been no dis turbance.—London fllol-e. Bermuda's Ideal Government. The Bermudan* govern them selves under a veto power which i practically never exerted. Th>'ir constitution is nlmo t ideal. Ilern is n little world of its own, with a population of 17,000 souls. The good citizens elect their representa tives to a home of a- emhly and they administer the affair-, of the colony with economy, justice and success. Here, ns in every English colony, one is impress'd with the great respect for the law. Like many of the Indian islands, the Bermudas have almost no crime. The two jails ut St. (leorge and Hamilton look like summer hoard ing houses, and Chnrle- Dudley Warner tried to become u “paying guest” with the jailer at St. tieorge, to share his pleasant tropical home and relieve his lonesomelincss and ennui. : —World’s Work. “Budding” Antiques. Manufacturers of spurious an tique furniture have developed a new idea to enable them to more easily dispose of their wares. In stead of faking the entire piece from new wood the fraud purchases a genuine antique, which is duplicat ed in his factory, a dozen copies be ing made. To each piece is allotted a single section of the original. In the sale the attention of the buyer is particularly directed to this part, and ns he is soon convinced of the genuineness of the claim the sale is more easily made than when the entire piece has been faked. The process is called “budding.”— New York Herald. Hli Own Son. An, anecdote is told of Richard Seddon, the late premier of New Zealand. lie was very active in sending troops to the assistance of Great Britain in the South Af rican war. On one occasion he was taunted by an opposition member with his readiness to sacrifice the lives of the colony’s manhood. “You are ready enough to send our sons and brothers to lie shot at, hut"— was the opening of a taunt hy his opponent, when the premier broke in: “Sir. this morning I signed a commission for mv own son. Ho will be shot at, too, and I have dar ed him to come hack without a wound.” France's Political Stability. It was Bismarck's hope when he consented to the formation of the French republic that it would he a transient and feeble form of govern ment and would prevent France from bring ever again n force to reckon with in Europe. It is thirty six years since then, and every year has revealed an advance in security and strength. France having found the government which suited her has shown a contentment with it which has virtually put the question outside practical politics.—London Spectator. A Fest of Surgery. New Zealand surgeons have ac complished a remarkable feat. Har ley Williams of Wellington was hurt In an accident which destroyed his right hand ami burned the sole of his right foot so that it was impossi ble for it to heal without a new >kin. The surgeons strapped the soleless foot closely to the inside of the left thigh and allowed it to grow there. After the foot had grown into the thigh it was put away, the skin of the thigh adhering to the foot. The patient recovered. A Kentucky Breakfast. Those who desire to imbibe spirit uous liquors at n Louisville hotel on Sunday will be obliged to order a regular meal with it. This is at once suggestive of the menu of the famous Kentucky breakfast, a sir loin steak, a bottle of whisky and a dog—the dog to eat the steak.— Cleveland Plain Dea’* r. A LITTLE NONSENSE. Why the Bread Wat Sent Back to the Baker. A ho_v who had been working in a baker s shop for some time was just about to finish his trade. One night, when the bo— wu- gone, lie broke the marble slab lie molded Ins loaves on, so he went to the marble yard to secure another, lmt could not find one. On the way back he passed a graveyard, and, as it was very dark, he jumped over and pull ed up n small headstone about the right size and took it back and fin ished lii.s job. The next day, after the bread had been delivered, nearly all of it was sent bar k. The baker looked at it arid broke several loaves open, but found nothing wrong. Then he happened to turn one of the loaves over and found on the underside of every loaf this inscription: “Here lies (he bodv of Mrs. . Born A. D. KIM-*. Died A. I). FT 10.” Dun dee Advertiser. Frayed I ugin—l always carry a ! dub when I’m lookin’ for work. Hungry Hawkins—Wat for? Frayed Fag in—ls I ever ketch up aid il I’ll beat it to death.—Phila | dolphin Press. Her Pa’* Guess. “He writes,” said the heiress, “that he thinks of me so constantly that In* can’t half do his work any more.” "I suppose,” replied her gruff old father, “that he’ll think so much of | you after you’re married that he j won’t even be able to do the half lie’s still sticking to.” Chicago Record- Herald. Not Expressing Himself. “What do you think of your mo- I tor ear now?” asked tlio inconsider : ate person. “You must excuse me from rc ) plying,” answered the man with a desperate look in his eye. “I have been arrested once for speeding. There is no use in getting arrested 1 again for profanity.” —Washington ‘ Slur. Ho Played In Luck. Neighbors—Enpeek is one of the luckiest men I know. Homer—How do you figure that j out ? Neighbors—Why. his wife is so ' strongmimled that she never wor ries him about her troubles with | hired girls.— Bohemian Magazine. Never Found Wanting. “1 hope,” said the facetious cus tomer to his butcher,” that your meat is never weighed in the bal ance and found wanting.” “No. indeed.” said the up to date proprietor; “wo alius send people a pound or two more tliau they or j dors."- Now York Times. Fact In the Case. Singleton A sensible girl is apt to request the young man she is en gaged to not to spend so much money on her. Mrs. W odder! v—Nos, but she doesn’t have occasion to make such a request after marriage.—Detroit Tribune. The View of a Cynic. "You know, they say.” remarked the sentimental man, “that ‘love is blind’ “Yes.” interrupted the cynical bachelor, “but marriage usually re store' us sight.” Philadelphia Press. Best She Could Say. Toss l understand Miss Crabbe paid me a compliment last night. Joes- Not quite, but she came us near it as you could ever expect from her. She said you wore charm ing, but— —Philadelphia Pres*. Clearly Defined. “What.” asked the very young person, “is your idea of a dude ?” “A dude.” answered the observer of things, “is a young gentleman who tries to behave in a ladylike manner."—Chicago News. Raising His Hopes. “Poetry.” said the editor, “is a drug on the market.” "Yes?” replied the poet eagerly. “Am I to infer then that you pay drug store prices for it ?”—Boston Transcript, THE MONTGOMERY MONITOR—THURSDAY, Ot’T. 4,10 OT, THE TAFT JOKE WILL LIVE. Secretary Taft has found his way into comic papers all over the world u.i the result of the joke A -o iute Justice Brewer of the United State.' supreme court told at the recent 1 Yale commencement. The pi a.- antrvof the distinguished jurist was bused oil a compliment he desired to pay to the chivalry of Yaie men. “Yale men everywhere are polite,” said Justice Brewer. “But Secre tary Taft is the most polite man I ever saw in my life. Why, the other day I was in a street car with him, und he got up and gave his seat to three women.” Scores of clippings based on this joke reach the war de partment every week, it has found its way into many language', but the Germans seeifi to a; pro, iate it most. Many of the German papers comment on the story at length, and | say that at last the Yankees seem to bo developing real wit.—New York j PO't. Lazy People Feel the Heat. According to Professor Morrison | of the University of Chicago sum- j j mer is not the logical season for j taking vacations. As shown by Hie ' action of certain animals in hiber- j nating, winter is the natural time j for resting and recuperating from one’s labors, “The summer heat is : most enervating to the idlers, the I loafers, (hose who have nothing to 1 keep thc r minds and bodies busy, j As proof of this, do we not all feel i the heat more acutely on Sunday than on any other day? A 75 de | gree temperature on Sunday causes j more suffering than one of 85 de | greos on Monday. The man or j woman who keeps busy on a hot day | would never notice the heat, nine | times out of ten, were it not for the I remarks of others who have nothing | to do but think and talk about the j weather.” —Pittsburg Times. From Grain to Bread In Throe Hours. A record time for converting ! grain into bread has been cstablish |ed by a Canadian farmer. Wheat | which was in the sheaf at 3 o’clock | in the afternoon was made into j scones before 0 o’clock. When oper- | j.ntions began, a wagon stood in the barn with about half a load of grain ! in the sheaf. Beside jt was a , I thrasher. Connected with this was i a gasoline engine. The engine was i started, the sheaves were fed into | the thrasher and the grain was de- ; posited in a bin. The power was j then transferred to the cleaner, and j the work of changing the newly j thrashed wheat into flour was quick- { !ly carried through. The rest of the ! task was easy.—London Mail. Too Good For That Table. John Williams is a Labor member 1 jof the British parliament. Before | j entering politics he was ordained as 1 j a Congregational minister and still preaches. ’The other day lie sat | down at one of the dinner tables of : the house of commons usually re | served for members of the ministry ! lor cabinet. “Arc you a minister?” I asked the waiter. “Yes,” was the reply. The waiter’s face betokened | incredulity, but he went away. Pres ently another waiter came. “Wlmt department are yoil a minister in?” he asked. “The gospel depart ment,” answered Mr. Williams. “Oh,” said the wjiiter. with a smile, “you are too good for this table, sir.” A Wild Boar. A young Swiss woodsman hud the othef'day a life and death struggle j with a wild boar that would make any old sportsman’s blood tingle, lie was cutting wood near Goldswil when he was suddenly assailed by the beast, llis first move in self de fense had to be a violent kir k on the hoar’s snout, under which the brute ret ired a fevr paces. Before he could i charge again the young woodsman had hurled a log with all his force ' between the hoar’s eyes, completely stunning him. Then the man seized a heavy stake and got in liaif a doz en blows on the skull and the boar !*** ready for converting into bacon. Epicure's Lament. - Nothing now to cat has been dis covered for several centuries past. The monotony is not confined to breakfast. It is equally, if not more so, felt at lunch and dinner. There arc disgracefully few animals fit to eat, and the okapi, which seemed sent to solve the difficulty, is a bit ter disappointment, liecause there are only throe specimens of him known to exist, and two of these are stuffed. —London Sketch. A Procession of Ancients. The London common council has just repaired an old tombstone found in a churchyard at South wark. Its inscription reads: “Near this place lies Richard Griffin. Born at White Church, Salop, the 17 of May. 1620; interr’d the IS May. 1736. llis eorp was accompanied from the King' Arms Tttvern on St Margaret’s Ilill to the grave by 1116 ♦qitient people; the oldest pallbearer 95." t MeQUEEN | MeQUEEN | MeQUEEN McQUEEN % % ' * !Summer Passes! J Fall is Coming. Summer Goods Must Go. See & * ' uie for Bargains. Good Stock Always on Hand. I HAY TOOLS AND FARM IMPLEMENTS. I mC £ Save the Grass. It will Always lie!]) out the Cotton Crop. -3}« ' You Save Much More when you make my store £ * # # Your Trading Place. Old customers all say so. £ •* ' r — ——— —— ——■— ' jfc SOME LEApiNCt | New Ho me Sewing % % Machines and $ I flcCormick * | _ Mowers. | -#■ ■ £ Call Early and Look over the List of Bargains in I ' DRY ROODS, CLOTHING, HATS, | | SHOES, BUGGIES, WAGONS. § IW. H. McQUEEN, I | nt. Vernon, Ga. % jjfc ,■-*■s. - casa h | Selling Out at Cost | I Harder to Reduce my Very Will also give a discount of-fl [ Large Stock of Merchandise, 20 per et on other lines, and | -for the Fall Stock, soon to he with each dollar cash purchase l coming in, I will Sell All a ticket entitling you to - \ Summer Goods at a drawat the prize of Actual Cost. 8100 in Gold. I v jj Tliis is a Rare Opportunity for the People of this Section to ! BBY GOODS AT COST AND DRAW GOLD _ ■ 'Mi. t 1 Respectfully ask all who are Interested in Making or in Saving Money to visit my Store at Once, as I intend Selling the Goods Regardless of Cost. I have a nice Line to Select From. A lull and Complete lane of ! SUMMERS’ BARNESVILLE BUGGIES j AND BROWN WAGONS. ' J ; T!to two Above items l)o Not con.e Under the 20 per cent discount stock, but are being sold at the Very Best Figures. Pav Cash and get the Benefit of Large Discounts. — t ■ ■■ ■ A. A. Peterson, Jr. i AIUBY, GEORGIA. 1
