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REMARKABLE HOG ,
l-AYS DIVIDENDS
Lowndes County Hog Is
Proving a Veritable
Gold Mile.
Mr. S. L. Dowling, living sev- j
en miles out of town, is the own
er of a remarkable hog. During
the past twelve months she has
produced thirty-six pigs and rais
ed all of them so far. The first
litter of eleven was slaughtered
for meat the 15th of this month
and averaged one hundred and
seventy-four pounds dressed. At
ten cents a pound these hogs rep
resent $191.40. The one odd hog
in this litter has seven young pigs
of her own, making forty-three
pigs in twelvemonths.
The second litter of twelve
was butchered today and averag
ed one hundred and forty-six
pounds dressed. At ten cents a
pound this amounts to $175.20.
The total of the two litters so far
amounts to $366.20 in money, and
one sow and her litter of seven
young pigs yet to be realized on.
The cost of production was
four cents a pound for the first
litter and two cents a pound for
the second litter. The total sale
was $366.20; the total cost was
$111.60; leaving a net profit of
$254.60, with twelve youngs hogs
and one sow and seven pigs yet
to be sold.—Valdosta Times.
The Great Invention.
Chief Patent Clerk Abel
Snowzwetter was idly register
ing a patent device for stopping
unheeding trolley cars by lassoing
them, when he was confronted
by a long-haired, short-nosed
man with gleaming eyes.
“Eureka!” cried the stranger.
“First name, please,” said the
patent clerk.
“That’s not my name. That’s
my cry of victory,” explained
the long-haired man. “I have
an invention that is sure to low
er the high cost of living and I
want a patent.”
The clerk was so overwrought
with surprise that he nearly got
it mixed and sprtuig to his hands
and held out both feet.
“Great!” he cried. “For years
we have been waiting for you.
Hi! men! fellows!”
Soon the entire patent force
was gathered around to hear the
long-haired inventor speak.
“It’s this way,” he spoke.
“Shoot at sunrise every plumber,
iceman, coal man and tax collec
tor in the country and the high
cost of living will go down auto
matically!”
They tossed to see who should
pitch the inventor down the ele
vator shaft.
Squirrels Were Drunk.
New York—A special to the
Times from Tarry town, N. Y.,
says: When Hud Weeks goes
fishing he always comes back
with a good catch or a good
story. Today he brought back
both.
"As 1 was going over this
morning on the lake road,” he
said, “I saw two gray squirrels
eating out of a small pasteboard
box. When 1 approached they
staggered away like drunken
men. I looked at the box and
saw the reason why. It was
labeled ‘chocolate cocktails.’ It
had probably fallen from an au
tomobile. 1 watched those squir
rels as they tried to climb the
tree and get in their hole. They
were just like a drunken man
trying to put a key in the key
hole and had about as much suc
cess. I went on fishing, and as
I was coming home tonight what
do you suppose I saw?”
“Saw them signing the
pledge,” suggested Jim Grave
son, president of the Roslyn
Wheel Club.
“No,” said Weeks, “they were
both sitting on the side of the
lake holding a cake of ice on
their heads. They were a sick
looking pair, I tell you.” j
Matrimonial “Wants”
Put into Verse.
James O. Baldwin, husky lad,
wants to marry very bad. He is
50, six feet, strong-lived at
Caldwell, Jersey, long. Couldn’t
find a wife, at home, so he sings
this little pome:
“Wanted—Wife to clean and
scrub, mend my socks and cook
the grub. Must be handsome,
. bright and gay—3l if she’s a
day. Widow woman not deterred
—one kid, maybe, none prefer- j
red. She must have some cash j
to spend; an intellect with learned
| trend. She must be a music lov
er; fond of me, and nary other.
That is what my wife must be—
lum-te-dum-te-deedle-de.”
A Better One.
At the monthly meeting of a j
certain homing society, one of,
the members related an interest
ing experience. He had recent
ly sold a couple of “squeakers” j
very young pigeons—to a man
whose cote was two hundred
miles away. He sent them off
by train, and was astounded to
find them back in the old cote
two days later.
There was a painful silence,
broken at length by the presi
dent’s “Wonderful!”
“You doubt my word?” de
manded the narrator of the sto
ry.
“Not a bit of it!” was the re
ply. “It’s a strange coincidence,
that’s all. I sold the very same
man a setting of eggs in the
middle of June. Before the end
of the month those birds had
hatched out and had flown back
to me. Homing instinct’s a
wonderful thing!”
The Usual Way.
The Limited Express tore mad
ly along through the midnight
darkness. Suddendly the alert
engineer sprang to the lever, and
set the brakes. The sparks flew
from the rails as the locked
wheels slid along with a cry as
of pain. The lights were extin
guished as car after car toppled
from the rails. Then came a
shuddering silence more terrible
than the harsh grating of iron on
steel.
Some passengers made torches
from fragments of wreckage, and
searched for dead and injnred.
A sound singularly like a snore
isssued from a pile of debris.
Hastily removing several piecis
of twisted iron, they dragged
forth a slumbering porter.
“Great heavens!” they ex
claimed. “Didn’t you know
there had been a wreck?”
“Well, gemmun, I sho’ felt
somethin’ but I done thought we
was couplin’ de dinin’ cah at
Jackson.”
Devil Fish Fights
Fisherman to a Finish.
Florida newspapers tell of an
exciting fishing experience in
which Alfred C. Newell, the At
lanta insurance man, took part
last Saturday, when a giant dev
il fish was hooked and fought the
whole party for twenty minutes
before it got away.
Mr. Newell was a member of a
(party fishing from a chartered
launch off Alligator Reef, near
Long Key, Fla. Alfred Clarke,
of Boston, hooked the fish and
made no headway against it.
Mr. Newell and others went to
his assistance. The line broke
twenty minutes later and the
monster got away. In the mean
time the sea was beaten to a
froth where the captive had been
fighting.
This devil fish has been seen
several times recently in those
waters, and is supposed to be the
mate of a 1,600 pound devil fish
harpooned near there last season.
—Atlanta Journal.
L . W. BUSH,
Dental Surgeon,
Offices 2d Hour Bank of Soporfon Building.
Sopertnn, Ga.
THE MONTGOMERY-MONITOR-THURSDAY, FFR. 5, 1014
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H Paying any debt with a clieek is %
much safer than with the money. ©
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© od of keeping hooks. By having a ©
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I THE CITIZENS BANK I
§§ OF ALSTON, GA.
<©> p:
©' D. S. WILLIAMSON E. S. MARTIN JOE W. SHARPE p.
Q President Cashier Vice-Pres. ©
U p:
© DIRECTORS;
HT. A. Clifton Dr. J. H. Does A. T. Johnson
<g ; John Jay McArthur W. T. Mcßride F. B. Mcßride
v © J. S. Sharpe Joe W. Sharpe D. S. Williamson .©
©■ &
& .©;:©;© ©,©.©. .© mumm '©; ©;©.o ©. ©B - M I
I PHILLIPS & MORRISON I
I Dealers in Fresh Meats
1 I
Best prices for Country produce. Bring g
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| PROMPT SERVICE. MT, VERNON. GA. I
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1 COMPANY I
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Do jou expect to use Fertilizers |
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| The Uvalda Bank 1
UVALDA, OA.
J. J. MOSES, President W. F. McALLJSTER, Cashier
S 3 J. B. JONES, Jr., V.-President H. G. McALLISTER, Ass t Cashier JgJ
rmmmgmMmmßw-- * v
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THE PEOPLES BANK!
| SOPEHTON, GA. 1
Brick! Brick!j
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