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lC Advertiser and Appeal, a PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY. AT 'JB0NSWIOK, - GEORGIA, STACY. subscription Bates. One «py 00 nn.«n>T*l* * SSsL'ssssssassR L f **uI2riMeei*oOobt’tumry notices notgceoding * HnM eolicted for pnbllcation. When ex- ft SUw^rcbswA M »drerU«uieoti. wilettow and communications ahonld b« ad. Smaed to tUonndarriJtedj^ g T ^cY, Brunswick, Georgia, 1 EAPfl BAPOBT LODGE. No, 68, I. 0. 0. P., , *•“ are* G. \ j H. PIERCE, V. G. ITas. E.UMBBIQHT, P. h B. BAY STREET, BRUNSWICK, - GA. Convenient to Business, the Bailroads and the Steamboats. Furniture New, TableGood \L if.e.sj&c&sco., * PttOPUIii I’ORS. »UK»My _ _ __ nett House, (KJIOIKKLY PLANTER •»’ HOTEL), Uirli-t fyuum Savannah. G«. L HARNETT & 00, iMtopftinroits, HATES, $2.00 PER DAY. A bat, a cane, A nobby bean I A narrow lans, A whisper low. A amile, a bow, A little flirt. An ardent tow That's cheap aadirt. A band to aqueezo, A girl to Mas, Quito at ona's ease Most needs bo biles, A ring, a data, A honeymoon, To find, too late, It was too soon. -r**. A Smart Boy. Hamburg & Seersucker advertised for a smart boy, and they got him.— They put the smart boy behind the counter. The following is the eon' venation that passed between him and his fint customer: Customer (picking np a pair of gloves)—"What are these ?” Smart boy—“Gloves.” Customer—“Yes, yes; but what do you ask for them ?” Smart boy—“We don’t ask for ’em at all; customers do that.” Customer—“You don’t understand me. How do they come ?” Smart boy—“Why they como in pain, of course.” Customer—“No, no; how high do they come ?” Smart boy—“Just above the wrist, I believe." Customer—“But what do you get for them ?” Smart boy—"Me ? I don’t get noth ing for ’em. Boss pockets all the money.” Customer (losing patience)—"What is the price of these gloves per pair ?” Smart boy—“Oh, that's yer lav, is it? Why didn’t you say so afore.— One dollar. Thin fnvorito family Hotel, uruler it* now nimage meat, in recoiumcudfft for the excellence of tta CtIBINE, Lotne-like comforts, PROMPT ATTEJi. TlOJi AND MODERATE RATES. apri 123-1J MACON & BRUNSWICK RAILROAD. ■Ou tml after November 30, 1881. the following will bo Uio ached ale of the ll.tll.il B.: NIGHT EXPHESS (DAILY). .iTMoSlaccn 7:30 PM i .*nvo Jeaup 3:00 A M irrivoat Bruuawick 6:10AX jure Brnnawlck OKJO P M '«*»e Jetnp 11:S0P) 4 *t Marn .reive at Mac on........................7:00 A M DAYPA8SENQEBAND MAIL (DAILY). [evoMacon 7:00AM Dave Jeaup 1:48 PM .Arrive at Brnnawlck 3:60 P M f »»e Brnnawlck 10:*) A M («»eJw.up l.-SOPM brtvoat Sfacon TtfOPM For connection! aee 8,. F. A W. Scbednle. CUSHING’S PHOTOGRAPH Rooms, Newcastle Street, COUSER ABOVE BLAIH’S DBUO STORE. L 1 revpactfully inform tbo citliona of Brnnawlck that I bare fitted np the rooma located * »p° v « aa a PUoteuranh Ciallary. »uil un prepared There are a vuriety of ways to get married that should be mentioned io the fnshion writer who said tbut we needed more novelty at weddings.— For instance: A girl at Coultersville, N. C., was look id in a room by her father, who chained a savage bull-dog under her window, but her lover pois- ened the dog, pried open her window »ud carried her off to a clergyman.— Again, Mrs. Bender, of Baltimore, the day of her'late husband’s funeral, re ceived a telegram from an old lover, who is living in Missouri, saying: Have just heard of Reeder’s death. Will you marry me ? Draw on mo for $100 to pay the expensos of your self and children here.” Mrs. Reed er telegraphed “Yes,” and went to the bank, showed the telegram and got the money. Another good one comes from Nashville, where a girl, being forbidden to marry her lover, prom ised obedience, bnt one day requested her father to band their pastor a note on bis way to business. Thus he was nnsospeotingly led to deliver an invi tation to the clergyman to call at once and perform the prohibited ceremo ny; and the latter, presuming that pa rental consent had been obtained, .readily obeyed the summons. A coup le were viewing the rotnnda of the capitol of Ohio when it oconrred to them that the place was a good one to be married in. A minister was em ployed and the Governor gave away the bride. The editor of a Northern paper gives the following advioe to his readers: At the South of us are broad acres, millions of them, that ean be bought for one dollar per acre, in a climate that deals kindly with gray hairs, and where your prospect for along life will be enhanced. Take a eeoond thought before it is too late, for the move yon are about to make will be about your last The noonday radiance of the ge nial sun beckons to the sunny vales, rich slopes, woodlands and praries of inexhaustible fertility of the South ern States. There will be more North ern capital invested at the South in in 1882 than in all previous years since the war. The tide of prosperity is just beginning to set in that direction, and it is so irresistable that nothing will ever cheek it until the measure of Southern hope is full to overflowing. There are plenty of healthy locations in that section, and the per centage of old people is as large as any part of America. Go South old man, go Sontb, and live long, and die happy andj'well fixed,’ and let your grave be dag ’neath the evergreen magnolias, where the mocking-birds shall daily sing a requiem antil time shall be no more. A Bone at • Restaurant, to do nil kind* of work In that line at reasonable prices. nov!2-U PATENTS Weconttnuo to act aa Solicitor* tor Pttenta,Careati, Trade Mark*, copyright!, etc., tor the United State*. W# . J2iS nt f ‘••’••toed through ns ere noticed In the Sts- . Ti!. 10 Amxbicas. This huge end epleadld Ulua- iJl’iSLSSfiWi ♦ S .2 O a yeer^how, the Pn Am** vii'uh’a.of Scnomnc Atnutictn, *7Park Bow. v-jwYwk. . Handbook about Patent! free. When a man comes out of a crowd, and says be will uot ran for office, ho reminds one very much of that other man who pinned a temperance pledge on his coat, so that some one wonld ask him to drink nnder the mistaken impression that he wonld refuse. “Doesit pay to keep chickens?” asks a correspondent Of coarse not, you lunatic; it pays to sell them. It is an awkward thing to be ab sent-minded. The story is told of a certain Philadelphia gentlemen who discovered this at his cost It so hap pened the other day that the dining room of the dub whioh he frequents was quite fall, when a man who chanced to know his particular fail ing came iu very hungry. The waiter told the new comer there was no room at present. Spying our absent-mind ed friend comfortably seated and read ing u newspaper, a brilliant idea struck the hungry man. “ Has Mr. A. dined yet ?” be ques tioned. “ No, sir,” replied the waiter. " Well, never mind; take him bis bill and tell him he has had bis din ner.” The waitor hesitated a moment, and then appreciating the situation went over to Mr. A. and handed him bis bill. "> “ What is this for ?’’ quoth the poor fellow. "For your dinner, sir.” “ My dinner—ah ! have I really had it?” “ Yes, sir," rejoined the waiter in all innocence. "Dear me; I had an idea I was waiting for it. What a canons mis take.” And with a contemplative smile Mr. A. sauntered oat of the room, leaving his table for the use of the ge- nioa who had profited by his absent- mindedness. Xlfo Preservers In Factories. ■ Ypy j Seientlllo American. The compulsory provision of life preservers on steamers, and their manifest utility, suggests to a corre spondent the propriety ^! a law com pelling factory owners to provide at each window a cheap and efficient fire escape, in addition to the appliances and stairways mow required. One that would always be ready, easily un derstood, and usable by any person of ordinary intelligence, even nnder ex citement, could be made in the follow ing manner: To a staple firmly driven in the wall, immediately over each window, attach a rope or cord, say three- eights of an inch in size, and long enough to reach nearly or quite to the ground. This cord should be well made and pliable, and might be knot ted at intervals of say fifteen inches. The cord should then be rolled into ( a coil or ball, and tied in place by a small cord or strap, ready at a mo ment’s notice to be nntied and thrown out of the window. Mon, and even women, could descend it with little difficulty, or the stronger aud cooler headed could tie the rope about the bodies of the weaker and quickly low er them to the helpers below. Telegraphing in Japan, Telegraphing in Japan and China is no slouch of a job. There Are 44,- 000 characters or hieroglyphics in the language, andnotelegrapbio alphabet is equal to the task oi representing them. A system has been devised by which only 6,900 characters, divided in 214 olasses, need be need, and by the aid of n ambers they can be trans mitted by wire. Bnt imagine a light ning operator in America trying to send several thousand words' of a newspaper ‘‘special” by such a meth od as that. The operator, tho mes-. sage and the telegraph editor wonld all probably be<badly “broken up” in the operation. Children who have a little money ought to practioe saving something. Many boys and girls of to-day hard ly know a higher use for any money that comes into their hands than spending it for some foolish thing as quickly as possible. To snoh, a les son in self-denial and economy is very important As go tho boy’s pennies aud dimes, so, very likely, will go the mans dollars aud budreds by and by. Without having the spirit of a mis er, the person accustomed to save has more pleasure in layiug np than a spendthrift ever knows. Tbo way to keep mouey is to eiiru it fairly and honestly. Money so ob tained iR pretty certain to abide with its possessor. But money that is in herited, or tbut in any way comes in a fair and jast equivalent, is almost certain to go as it cumo. The young man who begins by sav ing a fow dollars a month and thrifti ly incroases his store—every coin be ing a representative of good, solid work, honestly and manfully done— atands a better chance to spend the last half of his life in affluence and comfort than he who, in his haste to become rich, obtains money by dash ing speculations or the devious means which abound the foggy regions ly ing between fair dealing and aotnal fraud. Among the wisost and most thrifty men of wealth, the current proverb is—money goes as it comes. Let the young make a note of this and sec that their money comes fair ly, that it may long abide with them. A Virginia Christmas Dinner Dur ing the War.—Mr. McCabe, describes Christmas pinner at a country honse near Richmond. The four gen tlemen were in uniform, and the three ladies were in homospnn. They had for dinner a $300 ham, and the last turkey on the plantation, value $175, and $100 worth of cabbage, potatoes and hominy. Corn bread was served, made of meal at $80 a bnshel and salt at $1 a pound. The dessert was black molasses at $60 a gallon, and after one cup of tea—real tea, worth $100 a pound, treasured for the occasion as a surprise, and not sassafras—there was coffee at discretion, made from sweet potatoes ent into little squares, toasted and ground down. An inspection of the Senate books shows that among the many people entitled to the privileges of the floor of the Senate, the only man *b»t is a plain citizen who has had that honor is Bancroft Davis, the historian.— There are many who are now plain citizens, but when they attained the privilege of the floor they were in pnb- lic life in some capacity. Citizen Bancroft was granted the distinctive privilege, . which he now enjoys, for historical and lilerarv work. Some British shipowners have be gun to man their vessels with negro seamen exclusively, the officers alone being white men. They take them at tho same wages as ordinary English or foi eigu seamen. Those / who have tried the experiment stuto thnt they find colored men as good sailors as Europeans, and that they are more docile and less inclined to run away. The two political parties are so nearly balanced in the United States Senate that it wonld be dangeroosfor a Democrat to go out long enough to get a drink without taking a Republi can with him. « A Rochester street car horse shok' ouivitthinbechthnothn a., hit the driver with ono and the cash box with the other, and an investiga tion showed that he had kicked the six dollars into the driver’s pocket.— Such wonderful sagacity on the part of the horse caused the discharge of the driver. It takes eight hnnderd foil blown roses to one tablespoonfol of perfume, while ten cents worth of onions will scent a whole neighborhood. Mormonism has some redeeming features. For instance, it doesn’t throw the harden of supporting a husband on one woman. It takes three scruples for a drachm, but many a man will take three drams withont a scruple. in the Maine State prison, died re cently, being upwards of 92 years of age. Ho had passed over thirty-soven years of his life in prison. He was noted as the man who played at one time a joke on the Warden of the Massachusetts State prison. He told a story about having a large stun of money buried in that State, and the Warden took him oat to dig for the money. After working a while, Phil lips asked for rest, when the officer gpt in the hole to dig, and Phillips, kicking sand in his eyes, ran away. A young lady in Kansas while chewing gum recently was struck with paralysis in the jaw, and rendered speechless. She immediately had four proposals on the spot A husband advertises thus: “My wife, Maria, has strayed or been sto len. Whoever returns her will get his head broke. As to trusting her, anybody ean do so. if they see fit; for, os I never pay my own debts, it’s not likely I’ll pay ber’n.” A newly-married couple, riding in a carriage, were overturned, where upon, a standerby said it was “A shocking sight” “Yes,” said the gentleman, “to see those just wedded fall oat so soon.” Paul Boyton was taken for a goose and fired at os ho floated down the Mississippi Yon can’t f<ftp those Western men. Why may a tipsy man fall into tho river with immunity? Because he won’t drown as loner as his hand “ I am dressed to kill,” as the re cruit said when he had donned his uniform. .