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BUT OAKEY IS NO SAVAGE
speeches as he would like, Oakey’s life has been marred somewhat by the
fact that he is always being thrown where he is obliged to listen to music—
and he was born without the slightest sense of tonal harmony. Music may
soothe the savage, but Oakey is no savage, and it merely annoys and
distracts him. What is music to anybody else is to Oakey only a sys
tematic distribution of needless noise. He dislikes it all from lullaby to
oratorio, and from ragtime to dirge.
I QUIT MAKING SPEECHES? NEVER
Senator Martine of New Jersey
dotes on making speeches. He is free
to say that he would much prefer to
abandon almost any other vice he has
rather than speechmaking. Last sum
mer Martine was one of a number of
members of congress who w r ent on a
journey to Hawaii. Part of their en
tertainment there consisted of an ini
tiation into a so-called Order of Ha
waiian Chiefs. This initiation, which
was held on a lonely island, reserved
for that purpose, was a good deal like
joining a college fraternity. Dignified
congressmen wore no clothes except
a modish skirt made of grass, and
were put through various amusing
capers. One feature of the exercises
was an electric mat on which great
men were laid full length, with hands
and feet tied, and blindfolded. Then
the electric current was turned on and
all manner of grave promises were ex
acted from the victims. Uncle Joe
Cannon, Congressman McKinley, Senator Martine and various other come
dians were among the number.
McKinley was ordered to promise that h^ would stump the country for
Theodore Roosevelt in 1916. At first McKinley was inclined to demur at
this, but they turned on the ’tricity and he promptly agreed to do as he was
asked. Uncle Joe Cannon refused to pledge himself to support the Demo- .
cratic tariff policies.
“Never,” he insisted. They increased the flow of electrical current and
he hastened to shout, "I promise!”
The next man was Martine. They bade him to enter into a covenant
never again to make a speech in the United States senate.
"Nuh, nuh, nuh!” exclaimed Martine, excitedly. “I’ll never promise that.”
They gave him a series of severe electrical shocks. But Martine was
firm.
Nor would all the electricity at the disposal of his tormentors move
him from his purpose.
HE DISAPPOINTS MANY
first advocate of the aerial coast patrol for all coasts, is young but well
known. Possibly above above all others he has obtained control by elec
v tricity without wire connection of objects detached and distant from the
so/iice of the current's discharge. His boat controlled from the shore with
out pilot or crew, his aerial torpedo and other* activities are new war
factors which may revolutionize military methods.
TEACHES BOYS WAR GAME ]
Washington has a unique “pre
paredness” feature in the school which
has recently been started for officers
of the High School Cadet regiments.
Lieut. E. Z. Steever, U. S. A., who is
the voluntary instructor, is careful
to keep all thought of war in the back
ground, as far as possible, in teaching
the boys, yet the lessons which they
are- learning are such as will better
qualify them to “do their bit" for their
homes in case the need ever arises.
At present the work is along theo
retical lines, conducting imaginary
troops over large maps; later prac
tical work is to be done in the field.
Boys who have “played” the "map
game” are enthusiastic over it. They
claim it is more interesting than check
ers, chess or cards. Withal, they are
learning something; not how to be
militarists, but how to be resourceful;
how to be logical and how to act
promptly. Lieutenant Steever is also
enthusiastic. Not only is he greatly Interested In boys as boys, but he wa»
himself a member of the High School Cadet organization of Washington.
As a rule, the man who becomes
a member of congress first gets his
name up while occupying some other
office. The rule applies to P. Davis
Oakey of Hartford, Conn. Oakey
made a reputation for himself as presi
dent of the American Association of
Baldheaded Men. The organization,
while national in its scope, usually held
its annual meetings in Connecticut,
and Oakey made speeches at these
gatherings which could not fail tc
impress one and all with his mastery
of the spoken word.
In addition to heading the bald
heads of America, Oakey has served
as aiderman in Hartford and as a
member of the school board.
One feature of Oakey’s speeches
which has helped to popularize them
and him in Connecticut is their
brevity.
In addition to not having as many
opportunities for making after-dinner
Dr. Harry C. Frankenfield, one of
the chief forecasters of the weather
bureau, is a member of the National
Aero club. In spite of the fact that
throughout the entire country eighty
five out of the hundred forecasts of
the weather are correct, it is generally
believed that Doctor Frankenfield has
in his prognostications disappointed
more persons than anyone else in the
United States, but the fact remains
the weather bureau saves the country
at least $100,000,000 annually and that
he is known throughout the world as
ope of its greatest meteorologists.
The variableness of weather condi
tions is one of the stumbling blocks of
aerial navigation, and a comprehensive
study of its fickle laws is necessary to
every flier, but particularly to the one
who must fly over the sea. Hence it is
easy to see why Admiral Peary wanted
Doctor Frankenfield on the commis
sion. John Hays Hammond, Jr., the
THE BULLETIN. IRWINTON. GEORGIA.
VILLA BANDITS IN ACTION IN MEXICO
■ I
IMIIFRiSr ?
Bit ,<
WM-SWEPT VERDUN
Crashing of Shells Only Sound in
Deserted Village.
r
Three Remaining Civilians Beast of
Their Courage in Staying in Bom
barded Town—Gendarmes Keep
Good Watch and Prevent
Pillaging.
London. —H. Warner Allen, repre
sentative of all the British newspapers
with the French armies, sends the fol
lowing picture of war-battered and de
serted Verdun:
Today, Verdun is not crowded. Not
a shop is open. It can muster three
civilians, and all three of them are
rightly proud of their courage in stay
ing in the bombarded town.
I have just been walking down the
main street. Everywhere there is si
lence except for the crashing of the
big shells and the sound of splinters
falling on the roofs. All the goods the
shopkeepers had collected as specially
calculated to appeal to the soldier in
the trenches have disappeared and
now when one walks down the Rue
Mazel one’s course is frequently inter
rupted. There comes a rush of wings
in the air and instinctively one makes
for the nearest doorway, ducking as
,one goes. Then there is a big explo
sion and one goes on.
It was in the Rue Mazel that I met
one of the three civilians of Verdun.
He was contemplating the view from
his door with a contented smile and
looked at me with supreme contempt
when I scuttled for cover at a par
ticularly loud explosion. “You are tak
ing refuge on the wrong side of the
road,” he remarked mildly. “The left
is the side to escape from splinters,
since that is the side from which the
Boches are firing. Anyhow it is no use
ducking, since by the time you’ve
heard the shell the danger is over.”
As we went up the steep, lonely
streets towards the cathedral our at
tention was suddenly attracted by a
stronge, piercing sound that con
trasted quaintly with the continuing
roar of exploding shells. It was a
kitten mewing plaintively in the first
story of a house. It had obviously
been forgotten in the haste of evacua
tion. The owner of the house had
closed up the shutters and had never
given a thought to the poor beast and
it -was slowly starving to death.
A rescue party was at once formed,
M. Georges Scott, the artist, who is
mobilized as a chasseur alpin, mount
ed on my shoulders and endeavored
to pry open the shutter with a stick,
but his efforts were unavailing, and
eventually the kitten’s life was saved
by the firemen of Verdun, who, at our
request, broke into the house.
Several large shells had fallen near
the cathedral. One of them had gut
ted a girls’ school and another had
landed fair and square on a shop that
sold religious ornaments and emblems.
For some unexplained reason there
was a cure’s hat lying pathetically on
the top of the debris, and at the back
against a wall that had miraculously
escaped destruction stood a stucco
statue of Joan of Arc.
The pigeons, which were flying in
uneasy circles above the cathedral,
seemed to be curiously disturbed by
the bombardment. As a general rule,
the birds seem to regard bombardment
as a natural cataclysm, to be suffered
since it cannot be prevented. Anyhow,
the pigeons of Verdun have not yet
grown accustomed to the noise of the
German bombardment.
Despite German shells, the French
gendarmes keep a good watch in Ver
dun. There is no pillaging, and the
refugees who in their hurry left their
house windows open and doors un
locked can sleep easy as to the con
tents of their houses, except in so far
as an enemy projectile may reduce
them to powder. Just near one of the
gates there is a house of which the
shutters have not been closed and
the window is ctill open. It seems
that just before the evacuation the
owner of the house had some special
occasion to celebrate. Looking through
the window one can see a table laid
for 16 persons and everything pre
pared for an excellent meal. There
was a beautiful, clean tablecloth with
napkins folded miter-shaped for every
guest. Decanters of wine, red and
white, were standing beside each plate.
On the sideboard piles of oranges and
apples w’ere waiting for the party
which was never to eat them.
The gendarmes in Verdun seem to
keep a catalogue of the shells which
fall in the town. Those who live in
bombarded towns take a definite pride
in showing the visitors the holes made
by German projectiles and the houses
that they had thoroughly destroyed.
It was with an expression of the great
est satisfaction that one of the gen
darmes asked us to come and see
his gate, because, during the previous
night he had counted 117 big shells
that had fallen into its neighborhood.
M. Scott, the artist, remarked to me:
“This war is the end of the battle
painter, since, apart from curiously
lucky circumstances, there is absolute
ly nothing to paint. Modern warfare
has nothing to do with colors. It is
a symphony in sound. It is a subject
matter for the musician, not the artist.
Perhaps the musician of the future
will be able to convert into terms of
music the extraordinary contrasts of
noise and sullen silence which one
may hear in a bombarded town.”
The cinematographers have been
taking everything they can find in Ver
dun, and their only grief is that so far
no shell has burst near enough to
their apparatus to be photographed.
SUES FOR SIOO,OOO
w
Mrs. Malcom Strauss, handsome wife
of the noted artist, has entered suit
for separation and has started action
for SIOO,OOO against Mrs. Arthur Selig
man, alleging alienation of her hus
band's affections. Mr. Strauss denies
any indiscretion. Mrs. Seligman, who
until a short time ago was Miss Gladys
Snellenberg of Philadelphia, engaged
Mr. Strauss to paint her portrait and
design certain costumes for her. At
the time it is said, Mrs. Strauss seri
ously objected, but as Mr. Strauss, ac
cording to his own words, was in need
of funds, he accepted the commission.
Mrs. Arthur Seligman is now on her
way tc Japan with her husband, having
been recently married. She is the
daughter of K. Snellenberg of Phila
delphia, who is many times a million
aire. Mrs. Strauss was Katherine Mc-
Donald, one of the most beautiful of
the Winter Garden girls before her
marriage.
FIVE IN ONE FAMILY IN PEN
Father, Mother, Two Sons and Step
son Convicted of Burglary and
Receiving Stolen Goods.
Twin Falls, Idaho. —Five members of
one family, including the father, moth
er, two sons and a stepson, were
taken to the penitentiaray to serve
serms of six months to fifteen years
for burglary and receiving stolen
goods.
The prisoners are J. D. Ross and
his wife, sentenced to serve from six
months to one year for receiving
stolen goods. Another son and Ross’
stepson, Orville Duncan, were given
sentences of from one to fifteen years
for burglary.
. Three young children of the couple,
including a baby three weeks old,
were taken to the children’s home in
Boise.
COSTS SNIPER LIFE
Smoke of Extra Shot Reveals His
Position.
Shows Ten Waiting British Marksmen
Where Troublesome German
Sharpshooter Is Hiding—He
Troubles No More.
London.—A noncommissioned officer
of a snipers’ section who has just re
turned to the front after what he de
scribes as “six glorious days of leave”
sends home an interesting account of
how a German sniper was put out of
action.
“When I arrived,” he said, “I found
a spirit of great and indignant offen
siveness prevailing in the snipers’ sec
tion. ‘What’s wrong?’ I asked. I was
told that a German sniper—a breed
we had congratulated ourselves on
having thoroughly exterminated, or at
least mastered, on our battalion front
—had for some days past been making
himself very objectionable by his won
derful ability in breaking periscopes.
He had also made all our ‘overland
short cuts’ very unhealthy. These
short cuts save us both time and trou
ble, and are very neecssary in bad
weather when the condition of the
trenches is none too good.
“On the seventh day the tragical
climax came. He had ‘outed’ forever
an officer. ‘You must get on to this
sniper and put him out of action. What
are your snipers doing?’ asked the C.
O. of our sergeant.
“Then we decided one and all that
‘Goggles,’ so called because he wore
big spectacles, must and should evacu
ate the firing line of reality for the re
serve trenches of eternity. A specially
selected party of ten would carry out
a drastic plan of campaign. The odds
would hardly be sporting, but then,
‘all's fair in love and war,’ so ‘Goggles’
would have to go. The next morning
we silently, and with the utmost care,
selected our positions.
“Soon he came —at least his first
shot did —and it spat viciously against
the parapet in front. The noise a bul
let makes hitting your parapet is most
annoying, especially as this one was
none too far from us. This shot im
mediately roused us to action. Hard
ly had the report of his rifle died away
ere ten telescopes were searching the
German parapets, scruitinizing every
inch, in an endeavor to pick up the
little puff of blue smoke that should
give us his position.
“No luck. We waited. It is a slow
game this, and essentially one of pa
tience. He might not fire again for
another hour or more, or he might fire
any minute. Slowly the time passed.
Thirty minutes —an hour and a hslf.
Bang! bang! He’d fired twice with
only a slight pause between each spot.
“Oh, indiscreet ‘Goggles!’ That sec
ond shot had sealed his fate. For the
first time he had shown an ounce of in
discretion.
“Within the next few seconds nine
rifles were trained with deadly ac
curacy on a loophole of small dimen
sions and insignificant appearance in
the trenches opposite. Like one man
we all fired and then waited. Nothing
further happened.
“Three days passed and no more
periscopes were broken. Then, timid
ly at first, and later with greater con
fidence, we used the ’overlaid short
cuts.’ Never a glimpse or a sign did
| we see of the bespectacled counte
nance of ‘Goggles.’ ”
HARD WINTER FOR HAWKS
Unable to Obtain a Living in Winsted,
Large Falcon Perishes
Miserably.
Winsted, Conn.—Loyal Higley of
Canton, on going to his hennery the
other morning, found, lying dead in
front of the door, one of the largest
hawks seen in these parts in years.
Aparently the bird had succumbed to
starvation due to inability to get food,
this hard winter.
Harvey Brown of Farmington saw
a brown animal making good time
across the fields of snow and gave
chase and the animal climbed a tree.
He managed to kill it and thought that
he had a coon until' it was on the
ground, and then found that it was a
woodchuck.
SALTS (F BACKACftY OR
KIDNEYS TROUBLE YOU
Eat Less Meat If Your Kidneys Aren’t '
Acting Right or If Back Hurts or
Bladder Bothers You.
When you wake up with backache
and dull misery in the kidney region
it generally means you have been eat
ing too much meat, says a well-known
authority. Meat forms uric acid whieh
overworks the kidneys in their effort
to filter it from the blood and they be
come sort of paralyzed and loggy.
When your kidneys get sluggish and
clog you must relieve them like you
relieve your bowels; removing all the
body’s urinous waste, else you have
backache, sick headache, dizzy spells;
your stomach sours, tongue is coated,
and when the weather is bad you have
rheumatic twinges. The urine is
cloudy, full of sediment, channels oft
en get sore, water scalds and you are
obliged to seek relief two or three
times during the night.
Either consult a good, reliable physi
cian at once or get from your pharma
cist about four ounces of Jad Salts;
take a tablespoonful in a glass of
water before breakfast for a few days
and your kidneys will then act fine.
This famous salts is made from the
acid of grapes and lemon juice, com
bined with lithia, and has been used
for generations to clean and stimulate
sluggish kidneys, also to neutralize
acids in the urine so it no longer irri
tates, thus ending bladder weakness.
Jad Salts is a life saver for regular
meat eaters. It is inexpensive, cannot
injure and makes a delightful, effer
vescent lithia-water drink.—Adv.
The average man wants others to
see him as he sees himself.
TENDER SKINNED BABIES . ■
With Rashes and Irritations Find
Comfort in Cuticura. Trial Free.
Baby’s tender skin requires mild,
soothing properties such as are found
in the Cuticura Soap and Ointment.
Cuticura Soap is so sweet, pure and
cleansing and Cuticura Ointment so
soothing and healing, especially when
baby’s skin is irritated and rashy.
Free sample each by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. L,
Boston. Sold everywhere.—Adv.
A man thinks he is misunderstood
because he doesn’t know 7 himself.
THIS IS THE AGE OF YOUTH.
You will look ten years younger it you
darken your ugly, grizzly, gray hairs by
using “La Creole' Hair Dressing.—-Adv.
On the Face of .lt.
“Mustaches come and mustaches
go,” scraped the razor to the lip.
“But I go on forever,” winked the
eyebrow in an almost inaudible whis
per.
"What an ’ighbrow remark,” twit
tered the chin.
“And what a lot of cheek,” cut in the
razor.
Whereat they all bristled-up and the
blood flowed freely.—Michigan Gar
goyle.
War Makes Geographers.
The war has made geographers of
us all. It seems that it has also in
creased the Londoner’s knowledge of
London. Six wounded officers, all
Londoners, born and dwellers in Lon
don, were offered a motor trip from
their hospital the other day. They
selected Hampton court as their ob
jective, and only one of the party
had seen It before. It is a common
saying in London, that only the vis
itor really sees the city, and there
is at all events an element of truth in
the statement.
There is a certain middle-aged com
mercial man of high standing in Lon
don, a Londoner by descent, birth and
lifelong residence, who, though he has
seen the Blue mountains of Australia
and the Victoria falls of Africa, has
never been inside Hyde Park, West
minster abbey or St. Paul’s Cathedral
—Manchester Guardian.
HANDY HUSBAND
Knew How to Get Part of the Break
fast.
“ ‘I know one dish I can prepare for
breakfast as well as any cook on
earth,’ said my husband one morning
when the cook was 111 and he had vol
unteered to help get breakfast. He
appeared with his dish and I discov
ered it was Grape-Nuts which, of
course, was easy to prepare for it was
perfectly cooked at the factory, but it
was a good illustration of the conven
ience of having Grape-Nuts about.
“We took up Grape-Nuts immedi- 1
ately after returning from a five years’
sojourn in a hot country. Our stom
achs were in bad condition and we
were in poor health generally.
“In a day or two we liked Grape-
Nuts better than any other kind of
food on the table. We both gained
steadily in health and strength, and
this was caused by Grape-Nuts and
Postum.
“A friend of ours had a similar ex
perience. She was seriously ill with
indigestion and could find nothing to
eat that would not give her heartburn
and palpitation, especially at night.
"She found that a small dish of
Grape-Nuts with cream made her a
satisfactory supper and gave her a
comfortable night’s rest. In’ a short
time she gained several pounds in
weight.”
"There’s a Reason.” Name given by
Postum Co., Battle Creek, Mich.
Ever read the nbove lettert A new
one apuenra from time to time. They
are genuine, true, and full of human
Uitercxt.
