Newspaper Page Text
VOLUME V. NUMBER 45.
. .. - ■
ADMIRAL HERBERT QUICK
Herbert Quick, member of the new
farm loan board, looks like a mag
nate, even if he is a farmer. One day
when -he went into breakfast in
Youngs hotel in Boston, one of the dig
nified" and portly negro waiters came
over and filling h|s glass said: “Good
mornin’, general, will you have some
cantelqup?” “Yes," said Quick, “but I
am not a general.”
The waiter brought it and said r
■"Now, governor, will you have some
cereal?” “Yes, some oatmeal, but I
am not a . governor.”
Again the waiter came and said:
“Now, judge, what is you gwlne to
have for breakfast?" “Bring me some
ham and eggs,” said Quick, “but I
am not a judge.”
As the meal drew to its close the
waiter said: “Boss, does you mind
fellin’ me what you is?” Quick’s sense
of humor had been already aroused
and he said: “Why, no, I don’t mind
y °T U ^/ m ad “ lral of the Swiss navy.” “For de Lord,” said the
sr ' not know jes what you was, but I done know dat whatever
you was you was de top of the heap.”
His tip 'yas scarcely less generous than the compliment.
Mr. Quick has been many things besides admiral of the Swiss navy.
Having been born and reared on a farm in lowa and having attended country
schools, it was not unnatural that in later life he should become the editor
of-a farm journal; but he also' has been a teacher, a practicing lawyer,
manager of telephone companies, associate editor of a political weekly and
mayor of Sioux City. In his spare time he has written a number of novels
and numerous magazine articles, and he has been at times quite active In
politics as a member of the Democratic party.
JUDGE CLAYTON KNEW
admitted as authentic. Whereupon Judge Clayton calmly remarked that
■while he was in congress as chairman of the judiciary committee he had
passed a law permitting proof of. handwriting by just such a method, and he
referred the contending lawyer to the paragraph and page of' the Revised
Statutes where the law could be found.
KENYON MADE THEM HUNGRY
*
Senator Kenyon stirred the sen
ate to a high pitch of hunger the other
day. He was talking about child la
bor. In the course of his talk he
drew a picture of a farmer’s boy sit
ting down to an old-fashioned coun
try dinner.
The senator was contrasting the
life of the factory boy and the farm
boy. He said that while the farm boy
worked in the Heids, rested at noon by
turning the grindstone, milked the
eows and so on, still he went swim
ming and fishing, saw the circus, and
had a pretty good time.
“I have a very distinct recollec
tion that as a boy on a farm I had to
pitch the bundles to the threshing
machine,” said he. “I used to think
that was about the hardest work that
could possibly be done In the World.
“But when you remember the
farmer’s dinner—the fried chicken and
mashed potatoes, and gravy, and corn
cn the cob." arid tomatoes, and the bread and the butter that melted In your
mouth, and the apple pie with a piece of cheese-and then you could go out
and He under;a tree—it was not so bad.”
. “ general 111811 t 0 the lunchroom and a chorus
of orders for fried chicken. ■ 4.
MAYOR MITCHEL STUNG
the frame of the mayor, his face contorted into a horrified grimace,. and he
made a frantic pass at the back of his leg. He was too late.
the
Sometimes it comes in handy for
a United States judge to have been a
member of congress. Judge Henry D.
Clayton, who is on the circuit bench of
Alabama, -not long ago was trying a
case in which the question of a man's
handwriting was involved. Under the
Alabama law,,it was always necessary
' to- prove a person’s handwriting, and
the admission of one’s writing by com
pafison could ■ not be taken In evi
dence to prove the authenticity of a
document Introduced In evidence. The
defendant sought to gain a point in
bls casej>y Introducing a letter In the
.handwriting of one of the parties in
volved. Judge Clayton ruled that the
writing was adinisslble.
Immediately the lawyer on the
other side rose and suggested to she
court that his long service in con
gress had probably made him rusty
in the law; that handwriting could not
be proved by comparison with writing
Mayor Mitchel, Police Commis-.
sioner Woods and a galaxy of other
luminaries that sparkle in the New
York city administration's, firmament
embarked qn.'the police patrol boat
at the Battery the other day and dis
embarked at Fort Wadsworth, on
Staten Island. ■ Their object was to
Inject and review the 400 New York
city- policemen- undergoing military
training at th^t ppint, but the mayor
was badly stung;
It fell out In this manner. The
policemen, to do them nothing more
than justice, drilled In a very able
and very soldierly manner.
Hovering over the mayor’s head
was a yellow-jacket, who took in all
these proceedings with a knowing eye.
The last notes of the police band
had died away, the last straining po
liceman had recovered his equili
brium ; it Was nt that moment the
bee struck. A shock passed through
.
IRWINTON, WILKINSON COUNTY, GEORGIA, FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 1916.
I The Rhame |
| Word ।
I*l
3 Bu GEORGE ELMER COBB I
(Copyright, 191«. by W. G. Chapman.)
“That’s luck!” uttered Mr. Lionel
Wray, as his daughter at the wheel,
their auto crept into the public garage
and stopped dead short.
“Yes, I’m thankful to get this far,”
echoed Lillian Wray with a sigh of
vast relief. “I was afraid we would
have to be towed into town.”
The machine had refused to take a
hill on the country road two miles
back. However, by using second
speed and halting frequently until the
carburetor had a normal supply of
gas from the chocked-up feed pipe,
they just managed to gain the garage
at a snail’s pace.
It was a drowsy mid-afternoon hour
and there was only one person in the
garage. He might be the proprietor,
or a customer, judging from his
clothes, and Mr. Wray accosted him
with some hesitation and timidity as
he made his wants known. Lillian
reflected that this stranger, at once
interested in their troubles, had a
fine intellectual face and she looked
gratified when he announced that, al
though the garage owner and his help
er were both away on a smashup job,
he felt an ability to help them out.
The young man took off his coat and
the sudden transition into a jumper
Caused Lillian to smile. He spread a
tarpaulin under the machine and was
soon at work with pump and tools.
“Have to take off the sediment trap
cover,” finally announced the im
'womptu mechanic. “It’s easy to pump
tne pipe clear, but it will fill right up
again so we might as well make a
thorough job of it while we’re at it.
She’s stuck hard, but I fancy I can
budge her,” and the accommodating
\ ® Il
“I Got It,” He Announced.
young man once more crept out of
sight, a formidable wrench in his
hand.
It was fully half an hour before he
emerged bearing evidences of exhaus
tive labor and grime, but smiling
courageously.
“I got It,” he announced with a pal
pable spice of triumph in his tone
and went over to a sink to wash his
hands. Lillian edged up to her fa
ther.
“Papa, dear,” she said, “you will
have to let me have some money. I
presume this will be quite a bill —that
young man had to work dreadfully
hard.”
“Certainly, how much, daughter?
The mischief!"
Going in turn through his pockets,
Mr. Wray finding nothing, looked per
turbed and dismayed.
“What is it, papa?” questioned Lil
lian anxiously.
“Bless me! if I haven’t left money
and check book in my other clothes.”
“Oh, papa!” palpitated Lillian with
concern. “Only seventy-five cents,”
she added, glancing into her purse.
“What will the young man think of
us?”
The young man, overhearing, his
back to them wiping his hands at the
towel, smiled quietly. As he faced
about Lillian approached him with
timidity.
“The—the charge, please, please?”
she faltered.
“Oh, that?” responded Vance Elliott,
lightly. “Let me see," and he feigned
to consult a written schedule on a
desk. “Ah, yes—twenty-five cents.”
“Twenty-five—” voiced Lillian
faintly. ' r
“Cents,’’ supplied the smiling ama
teur workman. “You see, we can’t
call this a regular job, as I am not act
ing officially";-- The mechanic's propor
tion would be a quarter, so—thanks.”
Lillian was immensely relieved.
She flushed, however, as her eyes met
those of this courteous obliging helper.
There was a slightly quizzical expres
sion in his glance! Had he over
heard her conversation with her fa
ther?
“An honest man!” exclaimed Mr.
Wray with energy as they left the
garage.
“He certainly was delightful,” ob
served Lillian, and there was the to
ken of a sigh in her utterance, as
though reluctant to sever association
with this splendid young fellow.
“Hello ’’’ exclaimed Vance Elliott at
high noon exactly three days later.
He was on a week’s walking jaunt,
putting in the last half of a desultory
vacation.
He was passing a handsome villa.
Gazing beyond its hedge, he caught
sight of a young girl seated at a ta
ble in a rustic arbor. She had looked
up to wave her hand at an old gentle
man crossing the lawn towards a
small building at the rear of the man
sion, suggesting a storehouse or work
shop.
“My friends of the garage,” mur
mured Elliott, and in a pleased tone.
He had not forgotten them, particu
larly the girl, and he recognized them
at once.
A maid came to the young lady in
the course of a few minutes and they
went into the house. Elliott was a
bold, original young man. He crowd
ed through the hedge, he approached
the arbor, he glanced down at several
half written sheets.
“Poetry,” he smiled —“and not bad.
Ah! I see she has left blank where the
rhyming word does not come satisfac
torily or euphoniously. ‘I drained
life's chalice all too soon —moon,
rune, noon,’ she has noted down. I’ll
add to the collection,” and the fun-lov
ing invader wrote, “spoon.” “ ‘There
came to me a carrier dove,’ she has
got ‘grove, rove, prove.’ I’ll add my
mite,” and he audaciously wrote,
“move.”
His spirit of mischief subdued,
there was no excuse for Vance to re
main, although he would like to have
done so. He crossed the lawn to pass
the little building into which he had
seen Mr. Wray disappear. He glanced
in a sashless window. Upon a work
bench was a model made up of intri
cate wheels, shafts, and levers. Stand
ing, shaking his head dubiously as if
at a loss to figure out some perplexing
problem regarding the invention, was
Mr. Wray. He seemed to give up in
despair. He left the little workroom
In deep thought. Vance entered it
and looked over the machine.
Half an hour later Mr. Wray, re
turning to the place, uttered a cry of
surprise to see an intruder absolutely
engrossed in working over the ma
chine.
“Hey, you!” he hailed challengingiy.
“Don’t bother me,” retorted the ab
sorbed Vance. “You’re working on a
great idea here and —glory, I’ve got
it!”
He had, indeed, expert mechanician
that he was, discovered what Mr.
Wray had lacked in his invention for
use in a large factory he owned, had
failed to find —the connecting link.
One hour later Lillian Wray came
to the door of the little workshop to
summon her father to lunch. She
flushed with a quick little gasp as she
recognized Elliott She knew now
where the “rhyme words" had come
from. She also made a new discovery
—pendant from his watch chain was a
coin—a silver twenty-flve-cent piece.
It turned out that the wealthy Mr.
Wray needed juat such an expert
mechanician as Vance Elliott It
turned out too that frequent busi
ness conferences at the home of the
capitalist became quite regular, so, of
course, Vanee saw a good deal of
Lillian.
And one balmy afternoon as they
were drifting placidly down stream in
a row boat, he made the remark:
"In suggesting rhymes for your
pretty poetry, Miss Wray, I omitted
a very suitable one for ‘dove.’ ”
“Indeed,” murmured Lillian con
sciously expectant of the sequence.
“Yes, it was ‘Love,’ ’’ and, with that
as his text, this remarkably eloquent
and persuasive young man proceeded
to plead his cause —successfully.
Municipal Art.
"Who designed that hideous monu
ment In the public square of your
town?” asked the visitor to Gopher
ville.
“That wasn’t designed by no art
ist,” replied the native. “It was de
signed by the mayors brother-in-law.”
Practical Preference.
“Darling, I love you so much I would
gladly die for you.”
"That’s very nice of you, George,
but It wouldn't do me any good. I'd
so much rather you'd make a good
living for me than a glad dying.”
LemberO^
jwcl \ I
ll»
a.
STREET SCENE. IN LEMBERG
HEN the fortifications of
the inner city of Lemberg
were dismantled in 1811 and
the space which they occu-
w
pied was converted into promenades
for the prosperous citizens of this
modern Galician capital of 200,000 in
habitants, it was doubtless assumed
by many that, having suffered “the
sling and arrows of outrageous for
tune” for the five centuries of its
municipal existence, fate would allot
it a surcease from siege and capture,
says the bulletin of the National Geo
graphic society.
Lying 60 miles almost due east of
Przemysl, and more than 450 miles
northeast of Vienna, Lemberg is sit
uated on the banks of the Peltew river,
! an affluent of the Bug. It nestles in a
, small valley which opens to the north,
and is surrounded by hills, the
1 most picturesque being the well-wood
ed Franz-Josef Berg to the northeast.
’ To the east, a distance of 7 miles, is
Tarnopol, near the Russian border,
’ one of the first points of attack when
’ the Muscovites pushed beyond the
Galician frontier.
A description of the modern city of
Lemberg as it existed in August, 1914,
requires many modifications today, for
’ the scars of war are to be found in its
many handsome homes; its broad, well
; paved streets; its Roman Catholic
’ cathedral, a handsome gothic structure
‘ completed in 1480; its Greek cathedral,
‘ completed in 1779; its Armenian
’ cathedral in the Byzantine style, dat
ing back to 1437, and its magnificent
’ monuments to such Polish patriots as
King John IH Sobieski who, ntter
having saved Lemberg from the Turks
a few years previously, in 1683 saved
all Europe from Mohammedan Inva
sion by routing an army of 300.000
Turks encamped about Vienna, his own
• force numbering only 70,000.
Nearly 700 Years Old.
Called Lwow in thq Polish tongue
1 and Leopolis in Latin, Lemberg was
■ founded by a Ruthenlan prince in 1259.
Nearly a hundred years later it was
added to the domain of Casimir the
Great, who bestowed upon the city
! the charter and privileges widely
1 known during the middle ages as the
1 Magdeburg Right.
1 Following the fall of Constantinople.
Lemberg enjoyed a revival of trade
’ with the East, but It was caught in the
maelstrom of rebellion and pillage
which swept over the Ukraine and a
• part of Poland during the last half of
• the seventeenth century, when the Cos
■ sack hetman, Chmlelnlcka, was dfrect
: ing the infamies of the “serfs' fury.”
Lemberg was one of the Polish cities
■ to fall before the arms of Charles XH
; of Sweden when the ill-advised Au
■ gustus H was drawn into the Great
Northern war, which devastated cen
tral Europe for the first 20 years of the
1 eighteenth century. In 1772, upon the
first partition of Poland, Lemberg be
came un Austrian possession, and 12
' years after this event Joseph II es
tablished the University of Lemberg
which, at the time of the outbreak of
the present war, hud more than 2,000
: students.
One of the most attractive parks of
i Lemberg, and a favorite promenade,
bears the name of the Polish patriot,
Jan Killnski, a humble little shoe
maker, who fought bravely in 1796,
was captured and taken to St. Peters
■ burg. After his release he returned
. to his shoemaker’s bench and in his
leisure hours wrote his recollections, a
. valuable record of this period of his
country's history.
Since the establishment of the Ga
lician diet in 1861 Lemberg has en
joyed Increasing prosperity. Its manu
factures include machinery and Iron
ware, matches, candles, liqueurs,
chocolate, leather, bricks and tiles,
while its commerce Is largely In linen,
flax, hemp, wool and oil. ’ “
In 1907 two interesting finds were
made In the vicinity of this city by
SI.OO A YEAR
laborers boring for oil. The bodies of
an elephant and a rhinoceros were un
earthed in a remarkable state of pres
ervation, even the hides being intact,
due, probably, to the preservative qual
ities of the oily soil in which they were
burled.
Brody a Commercial Center.
Only about two miles beyond the
Russian border, the Galician town of
Brody is a point of great strategic im
portance on the eastern war front be
cause it controls an important railway
line leading from Dubno, 35 miles to
the northeast, to Lemberg, which is
only 62 miles to the southwest
At the beginning of the world war
Brody was a thriving commercial cen
ter with a population approaching 20,-
000, more than two-thirds of whom
were Jews. Its prosperity was checked
to some extent about 40 years ago,
when, after having enjoyed the privi
leges of a free commercial city for
exactly 100 years, its charter was with
drawn.
Less than half a century before
Brody was created a town in the sev
enteenth century it was the scene of
an important battle in which the Poles,
commanded by their famous grand
, hetman, Stanislaus Poqleckpolski, de
feated a Tartar army. This was the
last battle of Ponieckpolski’s dis
tinguished career. For a quarter of a
century he was at war with Turks and
Swedes, his Initiation in military
science being somewhat disastrous, for
he was captured by the Turks in his
first important engagement and was
held in close confinement for three
years at Constantinople. Upon his re
lease in 1662 he was placed in com
mand of the Polish republic’s forces
and with a force of 25.000 defeated 60,-
000 Tartars at Martynow. His achieve
ments against the army of Gustavus
Adolphus were no less noteworthy than
his long series of victories whereby he
’ succeeded in keeping the Ukraine un
: der Polish rule.'
Brody twice suffered from disas
trous conflagrations during the nine
teenth century. The first, oc</ripg
in 1801, destroyed 1,500 houses, while
the fire of 1859 reduced I,ool' homes
and business establishments to ashes.
The upper waters of the Styr river
form an irregular arc extending from
1 the southwest to the north of Brody,
' being ten miles distant at its nearest
! point, toward the northwest. Five
; miles from the city, just beyond the
border on the Dubno-Lemberg railway.
Is the Russian town of Radziwllow,
with a population of about 8,000.
The Log Line.
The log line is one of the older de
vices for measuring the velocity of a
. ship. The log is flat is made so that
, it will float perpendicularly. To this
, a line is fastened, called the log line.
The approximate speed of the ship can
be determined by letting the line run
off for, say, half a minute. The length
of the line run off in that time gives
a basis for calculating the speed per
, hour. The log, during the experiment,
remains stationary on the surface of
the water, of course. This is the older
method. A modern method involves
the use of a log with a revolving
mechanism which is dragged along in
the water behind the vessel.
A Horrible Accident
A popular sportsman, being vastly
conceited about his fine figure, wore
corsets to show It off. One day he
was thrown from his horse and lay
prone on the road. A farm laborer
ran to render him assistance. The
first-aid man began to feel the fallen
one all over to see If any bones hap
pened to be broken, and suddenly
yelled out to another laborer:
“Run, Jack, for heaven’s sake, for
a doctor. Here's a man's ribs runhln’
north and south, instead o' east land
west”
