Newspaper Page Text
Wednesday, July 31.
MACHINE GUN FIRE AND ORDNANCE FLAMES
Hits From Headquarters
Company M. G. T. C.
(By Geo. K. Henkcn).
Captain Blanton was protographed
on a spirited steed, and we hope the
captain wall favor us with a photo.
The captain would make a perfect
model for an artist or sculptor.
Captain Harry Barton, adjutant, re
viewed the company and detachment
Saturday.
The company and detachment do
look splc and span. After inspection,
a panoramic photo of the officers and
men was taken. We hope for the best.
But cannot help being skeptical about
some of the faces in the group.
Lieut. Raymond B. Seymour is back
afther a visit to his dad. who is ill.
Glad to see you back. Lieutenant.
Lieut. Garrett is the original “Sunny
Jim" of the company.
The Lieutenant smiles at all times,
in granting favors or giving the men
“Hail Columbia." He is there with the
smile that won’t come off.
We like and admire it lieutenant.
Don’t lose it. (Steady).
We have at last discovered a game
that Lieut. Andridge has been unable
to master. (The art of playing poker).
That's al! right, Lieutenant. There’s
many more in the same class.
At that we pity the other players,
if you ever get the ‘‘step.’’
I I I
Lieut. Davis is the new manager of
’o ball team.
And still the team lost to the M. P.’s.
I’erhaps the team will win a game,
before the war ends.
We certainly hope so. We hate to
admit, that the moving picture cops
can beat our prides. Buck up, fellows,
get their angoras.
Milt. Fie is playing the game of his
life. Soccer.
Milt, sits on the table in the field,
and yells out commands.
He must imagine he is in the per
sonnel office. At least he feels at
home.
Sergeant Adams, just to get a real
feed, hiked down to the banquet of the
19th and filled his capacity
to the limit.
The Top Sergeant punished a half
of a turkey, and a quart of ice cream.
To finish up he cracked a few' nuts.
This was the best thing he did: He
is always at ease, when cracking nuts.
Assorted and other kinds, are his spe
cialty.
The Top Sergeant sure did enjoy the
concert. All he observed and heard
was the headquarters Jazz Quartet, se
| lected from the company band. He
| never gets tired of praising the band.
It beats the band.
No one blames him, they are worth
while talking about. They sure are
I making the company famous.
Playing at all camp affairs, and are
booked to capacity each day. Re
quests from civilians for the band’s
services are so numerous that the cap
' tain is kept busy interviewing the long
list.
| Popular question overheard: Who
awakes the band at Reveille?
They sleep with their instruments.
1 Joe Marra is some leader, he would
rather lead the band than oat. He is ,
a New Yorker, and a good scout, the
men all like him.
Joe Jacobs, just to show that he
knows as many athletic folks down
here as he did in the big town, intro
duced Instructor Knowles to the men
at the weekly bouts. Knowles is a
live wire. Every one enjoyed his little
talk on helf-defense. He was accom
panied by his daughter, who amused
the men with her exhibitions of mar
velous strength and development.
| Like father, like daughter.
Invite him again, Joe; he was a real
| treat.
Joe received an offer from a colored
boxer, which he turned over to an
Egyptian herogliphic expert to trans
| late.
j We favor Joe’s appointment as box
ing instructor of the camp, and volun
i teer to draw petition and get same
affixed with required names, to sub
mit to Washington ,D. C. officials.
At boxing or wrestling, he is there;
j many ways.
Tom Boyhen is waging an important
campaign against the stray cats. We
don’t presume to know why, but feel
I that Tom has had an encounter with
some of the feline species, at some
time in his long life. Tom keeps a
>ail of water ready to wash any rat
that approaches his rot.
Extravagant note: Tom Boyhen real
ly treated his tentmates to some jaw
breaking candy. Perhaps he feels that
the war will soon end, and desires to
ease his conscience, somewhat.
Private Louis Higers is now’ bathing
daily. Why, this form of amusement
Is puzzling, but we strongly suspect
the chald he uses in the office, is pen
etrating through his clothes.
Private Louis Schneider is resuming
his acquaintance with his sweetheart.
She arirved in town Saturday, and
nobody has seen Louis since. Louis
was well prepared, he laid in a supply
of powder, razor blades, and perfume.
Also a few' cakes of peanut bars. My
but he is the spendthrift, almost spends
a tenth of his army pay all in one
month.
The soccer games between the com
pany and detachment are spirited. The
score so far is an even break. If the
company don't break, some of the de
tachment’s (bones) the detachment
will beat them, bad at that.
French “Pop’’ Joffre is one of the
leaxiing players. He kicks so hard that
he breaks out in Parle Vous Franca is
and has the company players up in the
air.
Bugler Harsha was so overcome at
Pop Joffre’s jabbers, that he kicked a
goal, for the detachment.
Private Rathe of tent No. 4. is qual
ified to act as door mat, for many
of the companies He is the stepping
stone for some of the companies. At
i least that’s the way the company feels.
They walk over him, as if he meant
j nothing in their lives. Perhaps he
f doesn’t. But the detachment cannot
stare him. Go easy company, he means
well, and besides is a young and de
serves a chance.
Frank (Jazz) Welch is furloughing
In New York. The company’s sand is
< safe, Wnce Frank left. He made holes
' in the street of the company, every
A tim.t he (Jazzed). Especially when
p at the Soldiers’ Club.
|? The Soldiers’ Club janitor is the au-
I l iho> ty for the statement that Welch
brings most of Camp Hancock’s sand
in the club. While in New’ York “Jazz'*
will look after details regarding the
proposed minstrel show*. Bring back
a few’ actors, Frank.
Private Balhanyi went and did it.
Did what?
Why got married.
Some of his tentmates observed the
manner he smeared the talcum on his
“map” and wondered. He had to hide
that sun burn, somehow’. Wifey don’t
like dark features. We all wish him
the best of luck, also Mrs. B.
A contributor volunteers the infor
mation that supply Sergeant is not
common Jak.
Also since Sergeant Adams is our
first sergeant, he is a lineal descendant
from the world's first man, Adam.
Perhaps that accounts for his being so
broad-minded.
NOTICE TO MEMBERS OF HEAD
QUARTERS AND OTHER COM
PANIES.
A telegraph office has been estab
lished in B- ilding No. 403. opposite Di
vision Headquarters Building, which
will accept all messages, and save you
the tiresome walk past the Liberty
Theater. Besides it is in charge of
Private Karsch. a regular fellow’, who
will treat you with courtesy and aid
you at all times.
Patronize home industry. Also the
tailor shop, the barber in the company
street.
Hove you observed the new schedule
of prices in the tailor shop. Get in
step; visit the shop and look neat, it
will help the appearance of the com
pany and besides has the qualifications
of making good soldiers. Cleanliness
and neatness should he the motto.
Shorty Fawbert is still the cham
pion midget wrestler of the company.
His opponent is up in the air. At least
he imagines so. when he tries to stran
gle our postmaster. Shorty’s oppo
nent was observed “grabbing” the fowl
at Sunday mess. He thought he ob
served Shorty on the plate. Take a
tip. Shorty, get a grip on his spaghetti
holder, and you’ll throw him. Thq
next opponent of Shorty will be our
Top Sergeant Adams.
Mutt and Jeff will have nothing on
this combination.
Sergeant Major Bauer is In trouble.
He cannot seem to overcome the fond
ness for sleep lately. He is looking
around for causes. So far, all he can
discover is that some one in a nearby
tent is keeping him awake with Ghost
Stories Perhaps he means "talking
about the Ghost walking” He is so
tender, it's a pity to disturb him.
During the storm last week the Ser
geant. Major was found under the cot.
Private l/oujs Ix»ef the other evening,
after retiring, felt that a visit to the
postoffice would aid his sleep, so he
determined to try his luck. Being un
dressed, he thought he could save time
by slipping in a fatigue uniform, which
1 he did. As he w’as walking down Penn
sylvania Avenue, an ever watchful M.
P. stopped him and told him to get
dressed. Louis started back to his
company street, but nearing the head
quarters building ho found a piece of
lead pipe, and taking the chance, he
, placed the pipe on his shoulder, and
got away with it. The M. P. thought
( | he w’as out on fatigue duty, and nover
disturbed the ever-conniving and cun
ning Louis.
Corporal Harris has taken to horse
back riding, so have many others. Who
have taking ways about them.
Private Balser has the camera habit,
i Every time he observes anyone with a
camera he parts the remains of his
hair, and looks pleasant.
Milt. Fine snores as if he drinks soup.
He should make the band, even without
Instruments.
His natural instrument will get him
by.
Cook Ollie Edney ia fast learning to
be a “jazzer.”
His favorite pastime is dancing and
fox trotting.
Even when supervising a stew’, he
gets the steps.
Earl George Killeen bought a cus
pidor. We don’t know why. But have
our suspicions. Perhaps he feeds Louis
Loeb's skunk, and nothing more in a
way of a dish was appropriate..
Breathes there a man with soul so
dead,
That hasn’t observed Louis Loeb, pre
paring for bed.
Don't miss it- it’s a treat.
Bill Guthrie’s weekly package of
cake arived safely Just to show that
he can share it equally, Bill placed It
all on his cot, and asked everyone to
grab. Bill, as usual, got about. 90 per
cent, the balance was Jost in the scrim
mage.
Still we can't kick, we shared a rais
in with one of the boys.
Frank Jazz Welch ,’s in New York
looking after the. minstrel show’ de
tails. He expects to bring back
enough material and costumes to open
an opera house here in camp
Don’t forget the minstrel, show’ men.
Get yourselves in line to make this the
. best ever. All singers, dancers, and
snorers, register with Frank Jass
Welch at Y. M. C. A. No. 79.
We extend our sincere thanks to
Stenographer Obringer, of tent No. 5.
He aided us all week and very nice
about it, too. Next week we will
publish his life’s history, with a pho
tograph of his best girl.
Just as we go to press we learn that
Milt. Fine has made application for a
’ part in the proposed minstrel show,
and claimed his snoring qualified him
for a leading part.
High Notes From
Co. 2 of Group One
OF GROUP ONE—.. shrdl sthardo shrdu
Horace E. Lynch, who hails from Del
aware. may he seen any evening before
Retreat taking a shave. He is constantly
thinking of going to town each night.
William Muller had the distinction of
cleaning guns (four in alb in the past
few days, and is now wondering if he is
going to continue with this honorable job
or be placed on K. P. duty.
Clark Little is the only one who loves to
work in the kitchen, for he says that ha
does not have to fight in order to get his
"eats.”
Morris Peckis washed his jacket the
other day. He cleansed the buttons until
they turned white, and now has the nerve
to say they look very good.
Charles Levitt expected to be trans-
ferred to Camp Dix. but landed in the
Base Hospital.
Jack Rosenberg received a pass last
Saturday and traveled to Aiken. S. C. He
took a liking to the place and did not re
turn to camp until two days after. He is
now’ enjoying life at Camp Hancock once
more, being confined to the company
street for two weeks and also on K. P.
duty for that length of time. He is some
waiter, and the boys never get hungry
while he is around. His intended wife is
expected to be in camp on August 15. and
he hopes that his confinement will be
ended by that time.
William J. Daly has the men on their
toes all the time, as he is first in lino
when the whistle is blown for mess. He is
the. first one to the table and the last one
out of the rtiess hall. When the men are
lined up (or drill he is not to be found
anywhere, so he comes back and plays
"hookey" in his tent. However, one time
he was fooled; the sergeant got wise to
this sly fox. also a few others; some re
ceived K. P. and some were put on detail
to clean some guns. Daly took two days
to clean some of the guns and every time
some one passed by they said. "Theer is
the faker; look atjiim now polishing up
the guns." He expects to be transferred
any minute.
Abraham Weisman, who is working at
the French Military Mission. comes
around occasionally. If anyone asked him
a question in English he tries to answer
them in French. Some cla. to that boy—
he has a job like a millionaire.
Supply Sergt. McDonald is the hard
boiled egg who can wash his clothes by
right oblique or left oblique.
Corporal Ellis is now raising a mis
placedeyebrow and guarantees full bloom
in another week.
A. Murray Schrager comes to Machine
Gun Company 2 with a good reputation as
a cook. He has been with the boys more
than a week and is assisting In feeding
the boys the best to be had. Murray is
an all-round, jolly good fellow, and his
disposition has few equals.
There is a certain new corporal who re
ceives quite a few letters every day in
fancy pink envelopes. You had better
send her a new box of paper, Cloude—try
baby blue this time.
We have a fine group of Non-Coms now.
They are all trying to make it as easy as
i possible for the new men. who are. a fine
husky bunch and take hold of things very
quickly. It won't be long before the Sec
ond Company is the crack company of the
First Group.
The gun squad fro mthe Second Com
pany, working with the other squads un
der the supervision of Captain Smith on
the drill field, have cinced all the records
for sdeed.
Charles Heinrichs, who has splendid
vocal talent, is singing right smartly these
• (lays. His Sundays and off-hours during
i the week are utilized to good advantages,
> either In the churches down town or in
. one of our “Y" huts at Camp Hancock
He is wearing the stripes on his arm and
is going to work hard for promotion. St irk
1 to this man. fellows .follow his wavs and
you will also develop into a clean-cut
manly character!
Funnies From
sth H. M. O. R. S.
‘ The sth has about completed the ord-
> nance training. All men who can’t use
) the shovel in four counts are put in the
awkward squad.
First Sargeant Simmons has the blues
--guess his best girl has gone back on
• him.
Relieve me. when you are lazy, tell the
’ cooks, they know how to put the pep in
: you.
- Come over and shade hands with us.
We have some good hand-shakers.
1 Cheer up Rienau, the world hasn’t come
to an end yet.
To hear Corporal Si at night you'd
I think that he was a big man. Lav off.
3 kid.
’ We are crying over losing Corporal
‘ Armbrect **
! Hope to see you again, boys. Nus sed.
' Male Help Wanted-—Wanted two ener
getic young men to join the sth H. M. O. i
• R.’s S 2nd Reg. as hand-shakers. We
want men who are fully instructed in this
line of work as we are completely out of
. good han-shakers. Apply at once. Good
> wages. S2O a mo. paid.—Adv.
Private Geo. Gladback of 2nd Casual
Company received pleasant news from
. his home town that his sweetheart was
t <<-mmg down for a few days visit. You
ought to sec the pleasant look George
’ entries around.
M. F. Zintermaater of 2nd Casual Com
pany has had something in his tooth for
j three days He says he can’t find a tooth
pick no place.
i There ain’t much left 'o the scenes in
your childhood.
They’ve fo’closed the rno’gage and every
things new,
The orchard, the meadow, the deep tan
gled wildwood am now In allot-
I ments and factory sites too,
The stream Is a sewer, nothin’ could st an’
j by it,
Toe bridge was removed on 'count of de
smell.
The cot o' my father, the dairy house
nigh it and the ole oaken bucket
> am all shot to —— pieces
j That germ-laden bucket, the health of
ficer took it and closed up de well
A. G. REICH,
3rd Casual, Ist. Reg. Ordnance,
(Sequel to Harry Cook's satire of July
’ 24, entitled "Eats of Mmy Childhood.”
LOST? One long, lean, low completed
gentleman, black hair, 6 ft. tali, wears
number twelve shoe. The finder will re
ceive liberal reward if returned to squad
one of the 32nd P. <). D. ('o., 2nd Regt.
HENFER HOOZU.S.
Squad Gossip From
Ist Squad School No.l
We wonder what Sergeant Cahill has
sprouting on his upper lip: it looks like |
the quills on a porcupine's back.
When will Private Rivolll learn to keep '
his eyes off the ground and giving back '
: talk.
; When will Private Kounvicki receive i
. the salami he has on the way for the
last nine days. Looks like he is kidding
ua.
There !s something over in the 30th
» Company that keeps Private Hammer out
I late. We wonder what it is.
J Corporal Ackalitis has all records brok
en for telegrams: two a day and then
some. Wow'
’ We certainly enjoyed the candy Pri-
• vate Schneider received. Give her our
j regards, John. Lend us your razor strop.
I -
Private Hughes says ft's all right to
make the state dry, but Bevo'is rubbing
it in.
; It’s rough to get drilled after a hard
! day at studies. Sergeant Cahill take
notice. Not that we care, but you know,
’ Rus.
i
Shots From sth “Pony
Squad” Co. A. M.
G. School
The famous Fifth Squad boasts the
champion snorer of the company. For
’ challenges consult Private Shears.
' A debate can be heard any night in the '
Sixth tent by Privates Shears and Hall, i
subject: Missouri vs. Connecticut.
f
’ Private Garey claims h* 1 should have en- ;
5 listed as a bull fighter. "We believe ynu, I
» Garey, you can certainly throw the an
imal?’
i We fear the safety of the company ba
i bies. Villaion and Wilson Think of the
i poor boys in town so often among those
"wild women" unchaperoned.
i Latest reports from Private Kane says
I hed oesn’t mind K, P.
i "Tell us Purdy, bow do you get that
way?
Now al] together No. 5 "We’re all going
over when its over, “over there."
TRENCH AND CAMP
Newsy Notes
From the Remount
(By Sergt. Jennings.)
We can't imagine why Freidman of the
Horseshoers changes his name to Burns
when he visits Thomson.
Corporal Henderson was conspicuously
absent Tuesday night when the ladies
from Augusta were at the “Y." tl was
learned on Friday night the reason he was
not present Tuesday night was that the
corporal was suffering from an attack
of tonsolltis.
Sergt. Ramage says that he can’t see
whv thev have to issue an order about
throwing awav the watermelon rinds for
if all the fellows like watermelon as well
as he; they eat rind and all.
We are very glad to welcome Sergt.
Roebuck to our midst agaih after an ex
tended furlough to his home in Pennsyl
vania.
The new men who have just reported
here to take the places of the men or
dered to Jacksonville may not be old ex
perienced soldiers and they may not know
a whole lot of military, but we notice that,
the manure pile has grown about five feet
higher since they made, their debut in the
corrals.
The scribe thought he pulled a pretty
good one once but he has to take his hat
off to Sergt Riley. A follow who can
get away with one week the way Riley
did deserves credit and we have to hand
it to him.
When it comes to the anatomy of the
horse’s foot Golenbeck is there. He can
tell every bone in the foot, but when
Sergt. Fllek asks him to describe the
trombone Golenbeck says that that Is go
ing over his head for he can't remember
exactly where that bone is located.
Specialties From
Specialist School No.l
Sergt. Wolliner and Private Kahn are
so friendly together and as they are in the
same tent' together we don't think it is
right, for when they try to kiss each other
with a pair of No. 11 EE marching shoes
thev might miss and hit one of the boys
in the tent.
If they fight on the other side as they do
here the war will be over as soon as the
Germans see them.
The durmbe.il squad No. 5 is so good
that they watch the 6th squad to see
what they do. Corporal Manlaek of the
sth squad is learning how to do right and
left face from ('orjboral Dillon of the 6th
squad every night. Dillon says that If he
can have Mauback doing it right in three
weeks ho will be satisfied.
Private Dillon was made corporal of the
6th squad and ho will play the piano on
Saturday at the entertainment.
"Boys" ho is a wonder so bo sure to be
there.
Private Trainor, k'ay, Kahn and Kren
iger wifi try to sing so don't miss it
Saturday is the day.
Since someone tried to make a king out
of our mess sergeant, we have been din
ing like princes. That's a deep one—get
Private Kooniger had his hair shaved
off so he would’nt need to comb it every
morning, or else to save money.
The boys of Tent No. 27 realize that
the country is liable to lose one of its
best Battery mechanics if Harry Kohl
' backer's sweetheart Id Dayton, Ohio,
1 doesn’t hurry up and get over that grump
ami write him a letter, 'cause Harry is
looking awful bad and I know he’s sad,
but it isn’t his fault at all.
Ea. z. w r.
Bits of Brightness From
3rd H. M. O. R. S.
Private Harrington has cleaned under
his bunk, which allows the rest of the
squad into thp tent.
1 Bugler Scott wrote home to hla father
asking for $lO, saying he was on the
hog. The answer he received: Ride the
hog home; we are out. of meat.
Private Berry has not been down town
in two weeks. What’s the matter, Dick?
Bugler Secrest woke up the other morn
ing playing reveille in ragtime.
The boys are not bothered by mos
quitoes in camp, but Private Cassidy is
still with us.
Corporal Hayes, the regimental plumb
er, would make a good wecret service
man. as he is always out looking for
leaks.
Private Cooney of foot class fame walks
in his sleep to keep in trim.
The regimental dentists are getting
to know Private Smith by his first name.
Private Maher is busy studying his
general orders At the rate he is going,
he will know them by the time peace is
declared.
Private Rau cannot understand why
the men use chewing tobacco.
Schlaefer’s the "Big Ben" of the ninth
squad.
Privates Kreuger and Levine are the
only phonographs that will run without
winding.
Casual Doings in 2nd
Casual Company
Ist Prov. Regt.
Broad semi-circles of joy bloomed at
the place where their mouths generally
appear on the faces of iSergeants Olson.
Pi f -kar.kl and Minkowsky on Saturday
g—am
Augusta Optical Co.
743 BROAD STREET.
BROKEN LENSES DUPLICATED.
Sun Glasses. Goggles.
ALL KINDS OF OPTICAL GOODS.
GIVE US A TRIAL.
> >\ STYLE
xETM J&H HEADQUARTERS
v J You o ™ cer# who the !nv
I .X/ pcrtance of wearing uniform* that
< ,n every dotall will be In keeping
7 a I \ i sJvomM with your rank will appreciate tho
/ V Y| B Inlb ultra-military effect and amartnea* of
\ If' ▼ z v z|M uniform* tailored by the maker* of
R Society Brand and
h JW I * Kuppenheimer Clothes
11 -I 1 8 ////J 1 w/
! I Av '• I Ws Officer*’ uniform* In Khaki, Gabar-
(J >' I dine. Series, and Whipcord may be
- had f rom our ,ar 0® atock or ordered
made to your Individual meaeui’b-
iA KA ment*.
CxrtfSmbCMhHi. to <g6g
ArJ
“Style Headquarter*”-—Where Society Brand and Kuppenheimer Clothe* are sold
as a result of an order coming through
permitting them to decorate their sleeves
with stripes. Sergeant Minkowsky has
been kept busy explaining that the war
rant for him was made out by the mili
tary establishment and not the sheriff.
A Red Cross man was seen in confer
ence with the authorities in the orderly
tent the other day, and it Is the pre
sumption that he may have been plan
ning to send down a big batch of wheel
chairs, crutches and knee pads for the
company’s several dozen sick men.
At last some of our sergeantsare go
ing to put out some manual work-in
the manual of arms at least. Sergeants
A. V. Sheffiddy, R. P. Mitten, F. A. Kais
ermann, T. F. Bell. W. R. Moore and
C. E. Bradshaw have been transferred
to the special training company of the
Second Regiment, and the company’s best
wishes go with them. Sergeant Mitten
is succeeded in the post of first sergeant
by Sergeant Olson.
Old Sergeant Jack Minko .sky.
It’s easy to figure just howsky
His breeches are now
And his hat and shirts, too.
He runs the supply tent. See nowsky?
Now that Hector Belanger, Oscar Ken
di gand Gus i Moshos have received their
cooks warrants, the company are smack
ing their Ups to detect more savor in
the chow.
Max Fromkin. the terrific but tired ty
pist, raised a wail to the effect that more
than half of his Job consists in writing
out passes for Supply Sergeant Jack
Minkowsky.
The folks back home may regret to
hear that Private Jack Andrews Is off
the water wagon again. Hut they can he
reassured when they understand the
facts fully, that ho has been promoted
from the post of comm nder of the com
pany slop chariot to that of mail orderly.
You can’t keep a good man down, espe
e.lahy a man of letters such as Andrews
has become.
Now that Private Paul Sneckner has
grabbed a post of distinction on the
meat wagon, it is expected that he will
have more opportunity to escort Some
body to church on Sundays in Augusta.
Id Leon McMahon has corns on his feet
From chasing up men in the company
street.
it's hard on his hoofs and it’s worse on
his liver;
Lot's start a subscription to buy him a
flivver.
Now that Sergeant Moore has left the
company, the letter writing championship
of the outfit is confidently' claimed by
Private F. E. Ureutzmann, who keeps
his fountain pen going so continually at
high speed that it seldom has time to
cool off.
' Private E. G. Phiser, the well known
boy scout, has taken up bis duties as a
Htudent cook. Hla friends feel a great
deal of anxiety lest he fall into the stew
by accident, while in the performance of
his duties and be quite unnoticed when
chow is next served. Now that three
more cooks have received their warrants.
It is Phister's ambition to receive a boy
scout medal for being able to light a fire
with only one match.
Bugler Espy, the Second Casual’s pre
mier windjammer, either believes that.
I "an hour early is better than a minute
too late." or clings tn that other old
philosophy, "early to bed and early to
rise, and the next day’s K. P.'s won’t
be all sleepy guys?’ At any rate, he
i blew call to quarters at 9:45 instead of
10:45 Friday night. Espy blamed the
. slip on his watch, which seems to be
> carrying the daylight saving Idea to an I
9 unwarranted extreme.
The steadily increasing number of lost
dog tags indicates that a batch of Sec
ond rookies may be In danger of being
grabbed by the dog catcher.
Three Bits From 21st
Company M. G. T. C.
I wonder if Acting SOrgeant Lauchman
will ever get tired of telling the boys
, what a wonderful girl he has way back
* in New York.
' i wonder how Sergeant Sheehan felt
when they asked him to hold up the shade
'. at the Yiddish wedding last Saturday
night. How did he ever keep that broad
smile off his face.
After a long debate, Acting Sergeant
Sam Lauchman has been appointed phys
i leal instructor of tent five. He tells his
pupils not to do It like the sergeant
majors, to do it like he does.
DON’T FORGET THE BOYS
; One thing you can give to the chap at the
camp,
Not a Liberty Bond, trinkets, or Thrift
stamp.
You miss us we kndw, still, it’s the will of
the land,
; So broaden your smile and stretch out
your hand.
Remove all the gloom, in It’s place fill
with Joy,
A smile now and then welcomes most
any boy.
But remember when smiling, to not smile
alone.
Try to endear him with joy spots of
home.
A liberty show, where smiles are dis
pensed,
It's doors open wide, the show has com
menced.
But the smiles are within, and the soldiers
without,
The barrier between is, "Your Duty," we
shout.
A word is sufficient, yes, too much, we
fear,
A smileage book is the admission price
here.
Private M. E. NEWMAN,
Co. E. 343rd Inf.
Camp Grant.
Pickings From the Camp
Personnel Office
(By Geo. K. Heoken.)
Capt. Strutz has returned after a visit
on an important mission to Washington,
D. C. The captain is as usual smiling.
Capt. Strutz found a real hearty wel
come in the office. All the men were glad
to see him.
The Captain also found changes in the
personnel of the office. But he still con
tinues to smile.
Rumors were afloat that some of the
men were to be sent to Washington to
take a course in personnel office work.
We hear that three of the select society
are the lucky men.
Louis Loeb, the information bureau, is.
not one of them. This may account for
the indifference in Louis' manner this
week. Or perhaps the "SKUNK" act fell
fiat. Cheer up Louis, try training some
of the stray dogs around here. Which
also recalls, that every time Louis leaves
the office, some mongrel follows him.
One of his pets followed him Into the
Canteen and Louis doubled crossed the
pet by buying apples. How could you
Louis.
"Yodel Dodelson is one nf Corporal
Harris' main locators. Between Yodel
and Midget Calure, Corporal Harris looks
like a. Wool worth Building.
Observed Private Dudley of the select
class tearing his hair. If he does not
watch out, he will pull the three of them
out.
"That Quartette,” Sergt. Don Butler,
Assistant Sergt. Milt Fine, Inspector
Frank Wigger, Cheroots Dudley, are play
ing the A’blon Hotel off the boards. Take
a tip. and quit it, or the Hotel detective
will begin bouncing.
The st loot society Is in executive ses
sion every day. Sergt. Butler's desk is ,
the most popular piece of furniture in the
office.
Cheroots Dudley received three checks
of substantial amounts and a 10 pound
box of sweets from Lofts.
He passed around the candy Dust.
Julie Gross sees Morning reports in his
sleep. At that he beats the Headquar
ters Band by at least five hours.
Gross begins raving about reports at 3
a. tn. and is suspected of urging the band
out to annoy the men.
Inspector Wigger assures us that he
does not care how many birthdays Che
roots Dudley has, as long as he receives a
part of the gifts of candy.
Walter Kline is still sucking his corn
cob, awaiting action on his application
for the O, T. S.
Milt Fine manages to keep awake while
on the job. We think its the cigars he
received that gave him a new lease on his
life.
The brand Milt smokes is called Dlvido.
Maybe it will, ask him. We had three, of
the mwithin the paat week, and are still
able to breathe at times.
Lieut. Brorstrom spent a miserable
evening recently. He was In the Order
ly tent when a terrific storm broke out.
and the Lieut, was delayed for almost 15
minutes. He felt so sore about It that he
worked until after 2 a. m.
It looks like it will have to be some
| thing stronger than a mere storm to make
Lieutenant take a night off.
We wonder if its the former civil con
nections of the Lieutenant that‘has in
spired his unusual capacity for work. Its
something fearful the manner In which he
kills himself by night work.
The Night Owls may apply for an in
junction to prohibit the Lieutenant from
working overtime. We will cheerfully
draw the petition.
Lieut. Emerson, the modest account
ing chief, is camera shy.
3. Vc »V VVI ’ a good Joking blonde
officer being that way before. Perhaps
we can get him In a photographer's grasp
unknown to him. It’s a shame to possess
good looks and be afraid to expose same.
Lieut. Bryan is a nephew of a famous
Major General of the army. It runs In
the family. Good natured soldiers are
scarce. Washington, D. C. papers please
copy. The Lieutenant reports that up to
noon all his property is intact. The loose
or light-fingered gentry are nowhere in
sight. Good reason, they are all in the
guard house. Which undoubtedly pleases
the lieutenant. If ever they steal the
Lieutenant’s smile, he will be hard put
No one reported how many men got
yBAWLRD" out by the Lieutenant dur-
Ing the Week
Perhaps the Lieutenant feels it's a
waste of time.
(-'apt. Strutz, thought the Canteen was
a part of his office. He recognized about
six of his men there at one time. It’s a
curse to be addicted to the dope habit.
If the Canteen holds out long enough,
all of the personnel office will be drink
ing Coca Dopa.”
How do they do It on eight per month.
Nick Collins received a manuscript
from his sweetheart and not to be out
done Nick wrote until 11 p. m. and by ac
tual count Hugh Mcßae accounted for 275
typewritten pages.
It’s great to ge an infant and Jove the
ladles. N|ck R quite cute, but we had no
idea that the local draft boards were com
pelled to go to the cradle to fill the army.
He Is so young, that Nick blushes every
time a regular soldier passes.
Corpora) Herl) Harris, the next senator
from Cambridge, received a check from
one of his constituents of a substantial
amount to aid his campaign. The cor
poral immediately bought a box of cigars
and acted like a real politician.
He even offered one to John (Boston)
Uonway. This caused Boston Conway to
Army Lockers
IL-J i Officers’ Leather Puttees.
(Genuine Cordovan, Pig, etc.)
We deal in leather are therefore competent judges of good leather.
CHEVRONS, CAPT., LIEUT. BARS, ETC. ,
AUGUSTA TRUNK FACTORY
718 BROAD STREET.
Fo MeT Kosher
SEE
SEROTTA
1218 BROAD STREET.
STARK
Augusta’s Oldest Dry Cleaner and Dyer.
UNIFORMS A SPECIALTY
Office 324 Bth Street, cor Greene.
Opera House Building
Page 5
rub his eyeglasses with a locater card.
John Tietjen the best locater card in
dexer In th*' office, was placed under ar
rest for failing to locate the dirt in his
tent. In this mis-deed he was aided and
abetted by seven other poor policemen.
The judge sentenced the entire tent to
quarters. The other fellows felt the sen
tence should be appealed, they favored
hanging. But John is happy he gets a
bonus, each time the Yankees make head
way at the front.
Friday Eisenkoff’s life consists of one
assistant after another. To date Frida?
has had six. hut. has his eyes out for a
few others in the rear of the office.
We hear Friday is after Johnny Reiss,
I the. all round man of the office. Friday
will have to fight Louis de Loeb if he ever
intends getting Johnny. If ever Johnny
leaves Loeb the office will be at a stand
still. John is the supreme guide of th«
receiving and supply department.
Walter Becker of the Insurance Depart
ment is busy those days making perfect
pin cushions and pyramids. He is also a
soccer player of ability. He is so good hfl
hides whenever the ball is in sight.
Blondcy Van Etten, the Bronx Rcxnso,
was indisposed for several days. He ate a
box of IT NEED ME biscuits and tlioufht
it was war bread. The effect waa rather
unexpected on his part, so to even it up he
hiked to Augusta and- ordered a ix>rter
house steak with mushrooms. And ended
the feast with cheese and he felt cheeaey
for the rest of the day and took extra
good one for good measure.
P. S.—Bronx Home New copy.
N. B.—To Editor: Be sure to spell Blon
die's name correct. VAN-ETTEN.
Van’s hntr is fast fading.
So is his famous bank roll.
Irving Machsotsky, the pink complex
ioned wonder, is now nursing a grudge
h gainst Augusta's fairest. We understand
that he was slighter! at a dance the other
night. His complexion looked like a booze
fighter to one of the young ladies, and she
refused to dance with any one opposed to
prohibition.
"Curly” Masotsky swears that he will
never drink another COKE, the rest of his
Camp Hancock days.
Good, now if he will discard the Russian
brand of cigarettes, we will forgive him.
PROPERLY
TAILORED
UNIFORMS
FOR OFFICERS
We offer you our 27
years of tailoring ex
perience for a real
Uniform.
O. D. Serge . $37.50 up
0.D.W001. $37.50up
0. D. Whipcord
, $45.00 up
0. D. Cotton Gaber-
, dine. . . . . . $20.00
0. D. Cotton
Khaki. . . .$12.50up
We are Military Head
quarters
If you want anything an
officer or enlisted
man needs.
Shop for cash and save
25 per cent.
F. G. Merlins
854 Broad. Phone 101
