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13 V JOE O’FAHKELL.
VOLUME I.
gytlw riFrchhi ChvonuU'
PUBLISHED EVERY' FRIDAY.
T E 1< MS :
ONE DOLLAR A YEAH,
INI'AKIAIII.Y IN AIHAIUT.
advf;ktihijm <3.
Advertiseiueuts iuserled ut One lu.l l»*r pur «<pMre
for I tic lb hi insertion, and Fifty Cents lor encu eini-
Huiunce. For longer periods u liberal deduction
will ue made.
W A. 1 LEK,
1 • Watchmaker and Jeweller,
A ext door above Reuvef* *t Nicbolpon’i*,-Hickson
M... Alliens, uu. All work warranted twelve munflis.
1)1111 JP W. DAVIS,
X A’tOll4<J-U(-LIHV,
.1 /’/J A AX, GA .
Office adjoining Daviw’ Photograph uii'utj.
A.l business entrusted tu ills care will receive
prompt ntteutioH. nmr.b
——————»———CT— ————l
a. m. Jackson. l. w. i Homas
JACKSON A- Til <) MAS,
O Atlowilit-H-hur,
X. W. Cor. College Ave. & Clajtnn Ms., Alliens, Ga.
Parties desiring Crim n il Warr ntsiang-t them
by c iihii-! on 1., V. I’litmi.is. the Count) Solicitor,
at their office; also at the Co’Tt iloii-e. ieh.S
GKO D. THOMAS,
AUarnfti-a- Law,
Office over University it uik, Athena, (in.
Business respectfully solicited, and prompt uttcu
t'oi mil rm teed (rb. 22
BAKHOW, I>. <• 0A..11U >».
J)VRIiOW IIROM.
) Attorneys at Law,
i I ESS, GA.
6ff~ Office over Talmadge, Hodgson A Co.
STILL HAPPY.
For the past two w inks, says an ex*
chauge. a druggiss has put up a per-
Kcription es some kind or other about
four times a day lor a certain small
boy, besides filling orders for a large
variety of patent medicines and porous
| plasters. The sales were ail cash, but
1 the druggist’s curiosity was at length
aronsed, and he said to the lad :
•• Got sickness in the family !”
■ •iKinder," wat the reply. \
I ••fmr father !
• Yes—all but me. Ma is using the
plasters for a lame side and taking the
tonic for a rash which broke out .on
tier elbows. I’a takes the. troches loi
tickling iu the throat, and uses the ar
nica on his skin, Lmisa uses that
catarrh snuff and the cough m-d.cme
J’.i.l wants the brandy for a sprained
ankle, and the equills are for the baby.
That’s all but grandma, and this pre
scription is to relieve the pain in hi t
chest and make her sleep harder."
••Rather unfortunate family," remark
ed the druggist.
"Well, kindnr; but pa sas s its cheap
per than going to the seashore, aud so
we plaster up and swalllow down, and
feel purty happy alter all."
A lady entered a popnl it drug store
in Newport, R. I , a day or two since,
aud accosting one of the proprietors, in
quired if there was any method by
which a large dose of castor oil could
be taken and avoid tho usual nauseous
laste. • Oh, yes, madam, we can arrange
that for you.’ The iady cast her eyes
about the store and complimented the
gentleman on its fine appearance, and
was invited to take a glass of soda,
which she accepted, and having drank
it off and waited a moment, reminded
the man of drugs of her errand. • That
is all right, madam,' he replied, ‘you
took it with your soda.’ ’0 Lord!’
exclaimed the lady with a look of con
sternation, * I wanted it for my mother!’
Tableau.
GEESE OR GOOSES!
The particular kind of a smoothing
iron known among tailors as a ’goose’
came near upsetting the reason of a
bright young clerk and the proprietor
of a Chicago tailoring establishment one
day this week.
The manager wanted two of the in
struments mentioned, and so told the
clerk, but after the latter bad sat for
some time writing on tho order, ho
looked up in a bewildered way and
asked:
DEVOTED TO THE INTERESTS OF ATHENS AND NORTHEAST GEORGIA.
• What do you call the plural of a tai
lor’s goose !'
• Why, geese is the plural of goose,’
said the master.
• Well, you wouldn’t have mo write an
order for two tailor’s geese, would you?'
• That doesn’t sound hardly sensible
in tips connection,' replieij the proprie
tor ; • h.|w' would it do to say two tai
lor’s gooses!'
The boy turned to the dictionary, and,
shaking his head, remarked:
‘ Websjter doesn't give any such plu
ral as that to goose, and I ain't going
to.'
The situation was growing serious,
when the clerk suddenly set to writing,
with the exclamation : ‘Now, I'll fix it.'
And the order which be soon handed
to the head of the house to sign did lix
it, for it read :
‘Messrs. Brown A Chardware
dealers, Fifth avenue : Please send me
a number one tailor's goose, and —by
the eternal—send me another just
like it.'
But further than this, the question of
what is the plural of a tailor’s gi oso mis
not yet been settled in this town, or
any other that we know of.
Festive Bi i.gi.ars M-. E. T.
Sweezy, of -J<>4 Classon avenue, corner
of Quincy sneer, whose family are in
the country, returned to the city yes
terday morning, and went to his house
for the purpose of getting some clean
clothes. lie let himself into the front
■ loot and proceeded to the basemem,
when he discovered that the back door
had been forced open with a jimmy
On reachi ig' lib top of lliAnairs < n be
second floor, he etumbliu oxer nine
champagne bottles and some glas.-es,
aud in a moment thought he beard
some person them a snore
wns beard from another room, lie
went upon his tiptoes to the door of the
back room and peeped in, when, to his
-urprise, bo discovered a rough-looking
lellow stretched upon his handsom
bed. 1 hen be stepped back cautiously
aud went to the door of the front room
and peered in. Another thief was lying
on the bed in that room in a drunken
stupor. They had gathered up be
tween S6OO and S7OO worth of property
and bad it ready to take away, when
the wine which they bad taken over
came them, and th* y laid down on the
beds to take a sleep. When they fi st
entered, Charles Johnson, one of the
thieves, says they went into the <e lar
to see if they could not find something
io eat, as he had not had anything to
eat since the morning before. They
were unable to find anything to eat,
but seeing the wine, took three bottles
of champagne up stairs with them and
drank it all-
Mr. Sweezy thought it better to se
cure assistance before he disturbed the
fellows, so he went quietly down stairs
again and notified his grocer. Officers
Webb and Downing were also called.
tMid they hll went and unceremoniously
aroused the drunken thieves from tLkir
quiet slumbers. John Burns, one of
the fellows who was sleeping in tho
back room, was inclined to make a little
resistance, but the officer cracked him
on the bead with his club, and ho then
realized that it was bettor to surrender
quietly.
An Elizabeth street mule kicked a
C„ B. & Q, baggage master the other
day. The baggage master turned, laid
his bands on the mule’s neck and crup
per, and shouted : ‘ Illi noise, 23,817 !’
And the family across the street ran
down into tho cellar to escape the torna
do. Tho veterinary surgeon told the
Elizabeth street man it was no use to
have the blacksmith mend the shoes,
because the mule could never walk on
them legs again. The baggage master
walked down to the depot, yawned,
stretched himself, and said he wished
business would pick up. He was getting
too fat and lazy for anything.
ATHENS, GEORGIA, AUGUST 3,187
What Rum Did fob Husband and
Wife.—Mis. Emma Judson is an ac
complished lady of refined manners and
appearance. Her husband is a retired
merchant living in Bridgeport, Conn.,
and they have a boy twelve years of
age. She is less than thirty. Soon at*
ter her marriage, with her own mocoy,
she bought’ a house in Lexington/ave
nue, Brooklyn., where tho couple pegun
life in comfort. Mr. Judson was fin the
liquor business, and his home " sis lib
erally supplied with wines. He became
overfond of drink, and so much so that
it led to a divorce, tho wife bein£ tho
plaintiff. Signs of reformation and
promises to do better led to forgiveness
on her part, and they were remarried.
After the second marriage, Mrs. Judson
herself became tho victim to strong
drink, and her husband began a suit
for limited divorce, that is now pend
j mg. Mrs. Judson went to live with her
I mother, Mrs. Margaret I’. Liodsley, at
i 154 L°e avenue, Brooklyn. 'She was
unable to break up her habits of drink
ing, and four months ago committed an
assault upon her mother, for which she
was arrested and sentenced to the
Kings county penitentiary for six
months. The life in the prison having
to a large extent cured her of her love
for liquor, her mother, on a writ of cer
tiorari. bad her before Judge McCue in
Brooklyn yesterday. Her release is de
sired that she may bo reunited to her
husband. She seemed to fjel her dis
grace keenly. She was allowed to go
on her own recognizance until Friday
when she is to appear to give bail,
pending a review of the proceedings of
) the lower court.
A South American -Horror. —Pe-
I ru\ ian journals publish a , account of a
horrible atrocity In I’rovi&fe °f
I Hualgayoc. Some monybs ago a rium
! her of persons from tlfte town oF San
! Pablo arrived at San ’Miguel for the
j purpose of having a baptism pei formed
!in the latter place. After the religious
j ceremony, those present-proceeded to a
i place of diversion, where, after the con
sumption of a good deal of liquor, a
scrimmage occurred between the par
ties from San Miguel and those from
San Pablo, which resulted in the death
of one of the former and the detention
of some others. A few days afterwards
a number of San Pablinos proceeded to
San Miguel and forcibly rescued their
imprisoned friends, threatening to re
turn before long to take vengeance for
the blood of their townsman. At the
beginning of the present month, the
town of San Miguel was invaded by
twenty five individuals from San Pablo
well armed and furnished with rnuni
i tions, who began to sack the town, be
I having with the greatest brutality and
cruelty. The inhabitants ascended the
church towers, rang the bells to give
the alarm, and attacked the invaders
with uncontrollable fury. The result
was that fifteen of tho gang were in
stantly killed, and the remainjing ten
were severely wounded and takun pris
oners. On tho following day thftl latter
were also lifeless, and the public Aquare
of San Miguel offered the revolting
spectacle of twenty-five corpses strewn
in all directions.
-
"Not at Home.”—A sign on a house
on Crogban street informs the public
that washing is done there, and it was
quite natural that a mechanic working
near by should take a bundle under his
arm and call there, and ask of the boy
on the step:
‘ Bub, is the washerwoman in !’
‘No, sir!’ was the prompt reply:
‘ there is no wasnerwoman here at all!
‘ But that sign says ‘washing done
here,’ ’ remarked the man.
‘ S'pose it does !’ remarked the boy in
a higher key,‘s’pose it does! A lady
may become the victim of unfortunate
circumstances to such an extent that
she is willing to wash and iron shirts
and sheets, but that dosen't make a
washerwoman of her, does it!
‘ I thought it did,' said the man.
' Humph ! If you draw a buggy down
to the shop to be repaired, does that
make a horse of you !’
The man was silently turning away
when the boy added :
• If you want to find the lady of unfor
tunate circumstances, go round to he
side door, but the washerwoman isn’t
at home!'
The Bank of France and Coun
terfeits. —The Bank of France has
lately resolved not to pay counterfeit
bills. A great deal of objection is made
to this measure by the French press,
which see in it an attack <>n that confi
dence which is requisite for paper cir
culation. It is objected that even
should there be considerable losses now
and then to the bank, it at the same
time benefits by the large number of
bills which are lost or destroyed in one
way or another, and which are never
paid. It is the business of the bank to
have its notes so made that counterfeit
ing is impossible, and only experts can
tell a genuine bill. There is already a
kind of panic among business men.
many of whom refuse to take the bills,
alleging that they are too busy to exam
ine their genuineness.
Just the Reverse At a dinner
party, where there quite a number a
sembled, each related his experience in
life. Finally one of the travelers to'd
such an astonishing story, that it in
.luuJd one who bad remartied quiet up
to this time to tell of a remarkable ad
venture which he had while fighting
J; l.fdmue. Ho said:
‘ Once during a skirmish, I had strayed
away from my comrades, and got lost.
While thinking what I would do, three
Indians came suddenly upon me. Be
ing a fast runner, I took to my heels
After going a distance, 1 looked around
and saw one Indian close upon me, and
the other two not far behind. Io tpedss
determined to make the effort to
despatch one Indian before the other
two came up. I waited for his onslaught,
and just as he raised his tomahawk to
strike me, I run him through with my
hunting-knife. No sooner had I done
tfiis, when one of the other Indians was
fast approaching me. I took to my
heels again—one more effort for life.
Becoming exhausted, I turned round
again, when I saw one Indian far in ad
vance ot the other. Determined to sell
my life as dearly as possible, I awaited
his coming. As be approached, he
threw his tomahawk, which missed its
aim. I despatched him as I had done
tho first Indian. But one Indian was
left, but I was too exhausted to give
him battle. I got behind a large tree,
thinking he might pass on without see
ing me. I fervently prayed that my
life might be spared, when, all at once,
I heard the Indian whoop. I turned
toward him—there was no other
choice—’
At this point, tho others who had re
lated such marvelous stories became
impatient, and cried out—
‘Did you kill him ?'
• No; be ki lei me !’
Twilight in dreamy Spain! The
express train was bowling along be
tween Tarragona and Barcelona, when
suddenly it was brought to a standstill
by the alteration of a signal, and in a
few minutes twenty-six armed men
took possession of it. They did not be
long to the Civil Guard. They were
brigands. Some of the passengers
were then dragged out and thoroughly
searched, and all money, watches and
valuables forcibly taken possession of.
The brigands then removed the cusb-
Sjs*! )><•!• yVninim in advance
ions from the carriages, and made a
minute inspection to see that nothing
valuable was concealed in them. The
ladies of the party had their ear r.nge
torn from their ears. An English vic
tim wiites: ' I lost all the property I
had with me, consisting of at least $650
worth, which composed my wtJich ami
qbain, money, pocketbook, andArlso my
portmanteau, which was in th'e luggage
van, and contained many valuable pa
pers.” The biigands even took from
him his railway ticket and left him pen
niless, with merely the clothes he wore,
and those partly torn from the rough
treatment he received.
The people of Andetsonville, S. C.,
presented Gov. Wade Hampton with a
tine thoroughbred mare as a birthday
present last week. The Governor is a
fine horseman and sets a glorious figure
astride a horse. His people love him
in private life, revere him in council,
cheer him on the rostrum, but they yell
when they see him on horseback.
—_—
A Demoralized Editor.—An ed
itor was sitting in his easy chair, bouy
ant in mind and heart, with that calm
serenity and blissful tranquility that
none but editors know. A shuffling
sound at the door brought him back to
earth, and facing nervously about, he
beheld a man of deep, determined look,
closing the door behind him. With a
sickly feeling of foreboding, the editor
motioned toward a chair, and gazed up
on the intruder, helpless and breathless,
resigned to meet the worst.
The band of the man wandered to-
,wa d his breast-pocket. Tu« editor's
:.5 ' blanched and <bis. )ij|s turmd
blue. Alas! alas! he had guessed
aright the dread mission of the stranger,
i man pulled out a Bundle of letters
ams papers. The head of the editor
fell forward upon his breast, and the
hands dropped listlees from the arms
of his chair.
‘My errand is not a pleasantone,’
said the visitor, speaking slowly.
•Thank heaven!’ exclaimed the ed
itor, plucking up courage. ‘ Out with
it —suspense is worse than fate,’
1 have an execution on your home,'
continued the man with professional
I’be mortgage has been foreclosed.'
‘Iloora! ha! ha!’ roared ttie editor,
springing up aud nearly shaking Gm
mans arm off. ‘Heaven l>e praised!
but what a scare y w u did give me!
Blister my corns, if I didn’t think you
had a chunk of spring poetry. Drive
on—sell the old shanty! Let’s have
your name, and down it goes for two
years' subscription. You’re an angel iu
breeches, old lellow, but you don't look
like it—darned if you do. Ila! ha!
A Professional Hangman-—With
in the past two weeks mue ciitninals
have been legally executed in the Uni
ted States, and a great many more are
billed, to use theatrical expression, to
appear in the the same melancholy roe
at future dates. In view of the increase
in execuions, and in consideration also
of the awkward manner ini which they
are generally conducted, it seems as if
there is really a necessity in this country
lor ap official hangman, who, who. with
the advantages ofVtudy and experience,
would be able to assist a fellow mortal
at bis final taking off without that delay
and bungling with whicn such affaus
so often attendi d.
The city oi London, England, em
ploys a professional hangman ata salary
of $25 per week. Iu addition to this he
officiates at most of the provincial hang
ings, tor which he charges a sum vary
ing from $250 to SSOO and first-class
traveling expenses, so that be is really
a man of some note in that kingdom.
Although executions do not occur w itlx
such frequency as they did in the d iye
of his old-time predecessors, when the
hangman was the busiest man in the
country, bis salary goes on all the same,
and he is prepared to do bis duty when
called upon iu a manner which is at
least humane, if not artistic. Tue ac
counts of the executions of some men
in tne United States are more horrify
ing than the tales of the ciimes wuieh
they expiate, and they certainly call in
very strong language for an improve
ment iu our mode of exiejtioa.
NUMBER 28.