Newspaper Page Text
HOUSTON HOME JOURNAL
Published Weekly at
Perry, Ga.
JOHN L. HODGES, Publisher.
RUBY C. HODGES. Editor.
Official Organ of Houston County
and City of Perry.
Subscription, $1.50 per year.
Entered at the Post Office in
Perry, Ga., as Mail Matter of
Second Class.
AND IT WORKED
“Can you spare me a moment? I
am not an insurance canvasser,”
said the man on the doorstep. "I
do not want to sell you soap, toilet
preparations, books, or anything of
that sort.”
The door had been closing, but
paused in the movement. The house
holder was reassured.
“I do not represent a sewing ma
chine firm, nor any who sell wire
less sets, gramophones, electric
cleaners, or motor-cars.”
The door opened a bit wider.
"I’m not a collector, cither of
rates, information, or accounts—l
find it hard enough to collect a liv
ing myself."
The reassurances had their effect;
no longer was there a sign of the
door closing.
"I'm not a canvasser for any po
litical party, and I don't want de
tails for a directory.”
The householder stared at him.
“For heaven’s sake, what are you,
then?” she asked.
“Ah,” he said, “I sec I have you
interested! I represent a firm which
deals in photographic enlarge
ments.”
YOU’RE KIDDIN’
“How about spending the winter
in Florida, dear?"
“Nothing doing. They don’t have
any winter there.”
Matter of Choice
The Prospective Tenant (viewing
house) —I think after all, a flat would
suit us better.
The Caretaker—Well, sir, fer me
self, I feel a flat so much like a
prison; but then, of course, it all
depends on what you’re accustomed
to.
Cured
We know a guy who stuttered so
His talk could hardly be endured.
Although he spent a lot of dough
His habit wasn’t cured.
A widow dame secured him;
She won his favor in a walk;
Of stuttering she cured him:
He never gets a chance to talk.
Optimistic
Dr. Quack—l had a great many
more patients last year than 1 have
this. I wonder where they have all
gone to?
Mrs. Wrink—Well, all we can do,
Doctor, is to hope for the best.
TRY IT
Frank (timidly) Wish I knew
what you’d do if I should steal a
kiss?
Ruth—Wouldn’t take long to find
out.
Not Interested
She—Doctor, you told me to show
you my tongue, but you haven’t
even looked at it!
Doctor—No ... it was only to
keep you quiet while I wrote out the
prescription.
An Easy One
The class was being questioned on
the cardinal points of the compass.
“If I turn to the cast and look nt
the rising sun, what is left behind
me?”
Boy—Yer shadow.
Warning
Flossy—Let’s play housekeeping.
You be the papa and I’ll be the
mama.
Franky—No, mom said we mustn’t
fight any more.
' Few 1
: % Lillie H
I
ECONOMY
A man visiting a house for the
first time, found that his host was
(j the father of three wild children.
The latter made so much noise that
the visitor found it difficult to hear
a word that was said.
One child was busy ripping the
upholstery out of a brand-new divan.
1 A second lad was driving nails into
an expensive table, and the third
was swinging gaily from a chande
lier.
The bewildered guest eyed the
youngster who was driving nails
into the furniture. He turned to his
host.
"I say," he said, pointing to the
boy with the hammer, “don’t you
find it rather expensive to let your
children play like that?”
The host smiled proudly.
“Not at all,” he replied cheerful
ly. “1 get the nails wholesale!”
CASE DISMISSED
Judge—Why do you want a new
trial?
Lawyer—On the grounds of newly
discovered evidence, your honor.
Judge—What’s the nature of it?
Lawyer—My client dug up $4OO
that I didn’t know he had.
Dead Beat
Offenbach, the composer, famed
for thg delicacy and grace of his
music, could not tolerate an off
beat or a sour note.
One day, for no discernible rea
son, he became angry at his valet
and dismissed him. When the man
returned a week later for a letter
of reference, the composer gave
him the highest recommendation.
“Why on earth did you discharge
the man?” asked a friend.
“He caused me terrible anguish,”
replied Offenbach. “He used to beat
my clothes outside my door, and I
never could get him to do it in
time.”
Sales Talk
A tradesman sent a well-known
doctor a box of cigars, which had
not been ordered, with a bill for 25
shillings. The accompanying letter
ran; “I have ventured to send these
on my own initiative, being con
vinced that you will appreciate their
exquisite flavor.”
The doctor replied:
"You have not asked me for a
consultation, but I venture to send
you five prescriptions, being con
vinced that you will be as satisfied
with them os I am with the cigars.
As my charge for each prescription
is five shillings, this makes us
quits.”
Hon Voyage
Three me.| arrived at the railway
station with the intention of catch
ing the last train. As they reached
the platfmvn the train began to
move out. The men ran for the
train, and ,he guard and a porter
bundled t\/o of them into the
guard’s vai„
The third man stood disconsolate
ly on the platform watching it dis
appear.
“Hard luck, sir,” said the porter.
“I’m sorrj you were unable to got
on.”
“Yes,” replied the man. “My
friends will be sorry, too; they were
| only seeing me off.”
SURE SHOT
“Did you hear about that woman
shooting a burglar last night?”
“Yes. What do you suppose she
was aiming at?"
Considerate
Wife—John, 1 am sure there is a
burglar in the house; ain’t you go
ing to get up?
Husband—Certainly not! Do you
think I am going to deliberately run
the risk of making a murderer out
of a poor fellow who is now only a
common burglar?
Evidence
“If it wasn’t for one thing I’d call
your brother a bald-faced nar.”
“What’s that?”
“H;s whiskers."
Bustle of Army
Irks Icelanders
Stolid Folk* of Reykjavik
Resent Intrusion of
Military Rule.
REYKJAVIK, ICELAND.—I
Reykjavik, a capital that has al
ways wanted to be alone; has a war i
jammed down its throat like a hot
potato and doesn’t quite know how
| to swallow it.
Many of its citizens, stepping into
the streets to avoid crowds of stroll
ing soldiers and jumping back to
dodge honking army trucks, wish
the old days would return, when
the only foreigners were an occa
sional crowd of cruise tourists and
there wasn’t a soldier in Iceland.
It is a strange mixture, the rem
nants of a backwater Old World
civilization overrun by the strident
activity of the British and Ameri
can armies of occupation.
Sunday afternoon strollers listen
with a touch of bewilderment to the
creak of winches and shouts of sol
diers unloading one ship after an
other in the little harbor. Long
bearded naval officers roam the
streets, waiting for the next convoy
to leave. American, English, New
Zealand, Norwegian and Scottish
men crowd the restaurants so Ice
landers frequently cannot even re
i serve tables.
Military Rule Resented.
Iceland’s 120,000 residents lived
virtually cut off from the world
until the island suddenly became a
i key spot in the Battle of the Atlan
tic. They are extremely proud that
their country was the world’s first
democracy, started in 930 A. D.
with the founding of the Althing
(parliament), and they find natural j
difficulty in accepting the necessary j
rule that military authority super- |
scdes normal civil life in such a |
front-line fortress.
Many of them, however, are prof
iting handsomely from their virtual
ly uninvited guests. Stores are do
ing rushing business, taxicab com
panies are reaping miniature for
tunes, tables must be reserved in
the best restaurants hours in ad
vance and getting a haircut often
requires an hour’s wait.
The city’s two motion picture
houses are operating entirely on a
reserved-seat basis, and it is virtu
ally impossible to obtain tickets for
an evening performance after 1 p.
m. The theaters are known a*
“Bio,” apparently a derivation of
the early Biograph days, and cur
rently are showing such American
features as “Drums Along the Mo
hawk” and “Dance, Girls, Dance.”
English Books Stocked.
Bookstores have stocked large
supplies of English books and
weeks-old London newspapers to
meet the heavy demand.
Postcard sales have been so
heavy that it is difficult to find views
of Reykjavik and famous land
marks. The supply now consists
largely of an Iceland pony standing
on a hill and James Cagney in a
cowboy suit.
A treeless, drab city of concrete
and corrugated iron buildings,
Reykjavik suddenly became an in
ternational host at an embarrass
ing moment, since many of its
streets were torn up for the installa
tion of pipes to bring water from
a near-by hot springs into a city
wide steam heating project. The
pipes were a casualty of war,
however, and never left the dock in
! Denmark.
The streets were filled up in the
best manner possible, but the inces
sant pounding of large British and
American army trucks—augmented
by heavy rains—has made them ;
muddy washboards.
Transportation demands are so ,
great that it is not an uncommon |
sight to see American army majors
hitchhiking rides to and from the j
city.
Airplane Is Used to
Tabulate Animal Herds
BELLE FOURCHE, S. D. Be
cause antelope can run between 60
and 70 miles an hour, the state
game and fish commission is using
an airplane to take an antelope cen- i
sus.
The flying game wardens rout the
antelope herds from protected gul
lies into the open where they have
little trouble tabulating the speedy
animals.
The game commission is taking
the census to determine the feasi
bility of an open season next fall.
Near Spearfish one aerial census
crew witnessed a head-on collision
between two fleeing herds of an- |
telopes.
“They met head-on at the top of }
the ridge traveling about 60 miles j
an hour,” Clyde Ice said.
“They crashed like a couple of
trains and nearly 100 antelope piled
together; but a minute later they
were gone and we couldn't even
spot a cripple.”
Rural Youth Put Movies
First in Entertainment
LAFAYETTE. IND.-Movies are j
the biggest lure in the entertainment i
program of rural youth, with danc
mg a weak second, according to a
survey made by Dr. Lynn Robert
son of Purdue university.
Dr. Robertson said that rural
young men see an average of 36 |
motion pictures a year, and young
women about 34. He estimated that
the farm youths spend about $l3 a
( year on entertainments.
I Just W]
a
S-S-SCARED?
Sambo had seen a ghost, and as
he related his experience his knees
sagged under him.
"Yes, suh,” he said, “Ah’d jes’
come out of de cowshed with a pail
o’ milk in ma hand. Den Ah hears
a noise an’ de ghost rushes out."
“And were you scared?” asked
one of his listeners. “Did you shake
with fright?” j
“Ah don’t know what Ah shook j
with," replied Sambo. “Ah cain’t
say I shook at all; but when Ah got
in de house dere warn’t no milk
in de pail—only two pounds of
butter!”
Wanted:
A pair of suspenders for the
breeches of promise.
A barber to shave the face of the
earth.
A dentist to work on the jaws of
death.
A few seeds from the flower of
speech.
A pen that will write with inky
darkness.
What to Wear
A miller should wear a sack coat.
A woodsman—a cutaway.
A chimney sweep—a black soot.
Sailors—white caps.
Brokers—stocks.
Musical lady—Accordian skirts.
Firemen—Long hose.
SMART BOY
Si Whitaker—Joe Lacker’s boy is
sure a studious chap.
Toby Lines—Yes, sir; he can
memorize a mail-order catalog in
one night.
Superfluous
Mamma (to Billy going to a
party)—Now remember when you
refuse anything at the table say, |
“No, I thank you, Ma’am.”
Billy—Yep, but I ain’t goin’ to re
fuse nuthin.'
Exercise
The photographer was drying his
plates in the warm sunlight. “What
afe you doing there?” asked alriend. |
“Oh,” was the reply, “just airing
my views.”
Rapture
My own! Thus was it soulfully S
His passion he expressed.
As for the object of it, she
Acted like one possessed.
Distressing
You’ll notice that the letter “S”
Is quite often in distress.
And really it deserves to be,
For it is "crooked” don’t you see. !
Lament
Poor Jones is living
A miserable life
He has a street car income
And a taxicab wife.
JUDGMENT
Ben—That Miss Griggs is the poor
est conversationalist I ever met.
Hostess—ls that so?
Ben— Yes. The only thing she said
| to me the whole evening was, “No,”
and I had to propose to get her to
1 say that.
Value
i “I always thought that Minks was
1 leading a worthless life.”
“Wasn’t he?”
“No; his life was insured for a
' hundred thousand.”
It Was
Judge—You are accused of killing
i your best friend.
Prisoner—He hit me, sir.
Judge—l should have thought that
that would have been the last thing
I he would do.
Prisoner—lt was, sir.
—A Lot
Cumso—Well, Mcßride, is there
as much billing and cooing as there
was before marriage?
Mcßride The billing has in
creased.
Kept Her Word
j "But your wife said she’d forgive
1 and forget." ,
“Yes. She’s forgotten she d for
| give.”
At Present Rate
"When your son has completed
his studies what will he be?”
“Oh, about 78 years old, I should
i think.”
And Wave
“The average woman does not
! use her head."
“Oh, yes she does. She uses it
to display her hats.”
Labor
There is a certain bunch of men—
Quite often have we seen ’em—
j Who catch a mess of fish, and then
Hate like the duce to clean ’em.
Slight Mistake
Billy—Paw, what is concentrated
j lye?
I Mr. Pucker—lt’s the short and
ugly word, Billy. Don’t bother me.
FORECAST
“What do you think of the pres
ent business outlook?”
“From the way my wife is spend
ing money, it looks good.”
Noisy Ones
“I hate people who talk behind my
back.”
“So do I—especially at the pic
tures.”
Ring Talk
Judge—Do you challenge any of
the jury?
Defendant—Well, I think 1 can
lick that little guy on the end.
Expensive Man
Clarinda—l’se decided to leave
mah husband.
Liza—How come? Is yo’beginnin’
to economize too?
Obeying Orders
“Hey, boy, what are you doing up
my pear tree?”
“Well, sir, there’s a notice below
which says ‘Keep off the gras,;.’ ”
Can This Be?
“Do you think the women, will get
there in time?”
“Sure; we’ll live to see signs read
ing, ‘Women wanted for the army.’ ”
Shining Example
: Fuddy—Did you ever notice that
I successful men are generally bald?
Duddy — Certainly ! They come out
on top.
Warning
Canoeing and danger
Are “hand and glove,”
You fall in the river
Or else in love.
Cancer Traced
Dr. Ludwig Emge, professor of
surgery at Stanford, declared re
cently there is some reason to be
lieve a vitamin A deficiency may
have something to do with chronic
| ulcers of the stomach which may
| eventually become cancer.
He pointed out that radio-active
substances, made by the use of the
j cyclotron, will enable medical men
| to trace cancerous tissue through
: out the human body. He said this
is the most hopeful line of research
; developed for the treatment of can
j cer.
He did not go so far as to say tha?
radioactive substances can be used
as a cure, stating it had been dis
covered that cancerous thyroid
glands, for example, will not take
I radioactive iodirte.
Sinks to Bottom
Does a ship sink to the bottom of
the ocean, or does it only sink un
til it has displaced its own weight
in the water?
A boat of any may be filled
with water to a certain extent, and
then may float along at the surface,
but if it goes clear under water it
keeps going down to the bottom.
Some have supposed that the pres
sure deep in the sqa would keep
a sunken vessel from getting to the
bottom. Yet there is no such effect.
Pressure in the deep sea does not
“squeeze” water together, at least
not to any extent which will make
a difference. Water cannot be
squeezed in the way gas can be.
The pressure below the surface is
due to the weight of the water above.
The weight above will not keep a
vessel, or any other object, from
sinking to the bottom.
For Women Movers
Women who aren’t happy unless
they can move all the furniture in
the houne at least once a month
will be interested in the invention
of Connie L. Agee of Long Beach
Calif. Suppose the article to be
moved is a huge upholstered chair
that is not equipped with casters or
sliders. First you push a small
lever on the back of the chair
bottom. This causes a single large
caster to drop down and make con
tact with the floor directly beneath
the chair’s center of gravity. Now
without much effort, the chair can
be pushed in any direction.
CLASSIFIED ADS
For Sale-Cotton Seed rim,
■ wilt No. 7 Strain 2; also Co &
4in 1 Strain 4. These seed I S
pecially adapted to this section'
Germination 85 per cent n
f.o. b. Dan Gunn Place on T
con Highway.
Address—Dan Gunn
4:8 Byron, Ga. R.F.D. No. j
■ For^ ale rfeovel y Double Flow
enng Peach Trees at Mrs pjT
man Cabero's or inquire at Nick’
Cafe. RS
A. W. DAHLBERG
Certified Public Accountant
1 Perry, Georgia
i Audits - Systems - Income Tax
ORDINARYS’ CITATION
GEORGIA, HOUSTON COUNTY
Mrs. H. T. Gilbert and L H
Gilbert as Executors of the
late of H. T. Gilbert, deceased
guardian of Jesse D. Watson J r
lunatic, having applied for lettm
of dismission from said guardian
ship of said Jesse D. Watson Jr
. for the estate of H, T. Gilbert'
deceased; this is therefore tone’
. tify ail persons concerned to
show cause, if any they can whv
his application should not be
granted at the Court of Ordinary
’ on the first Monday in June,l942
John L. Hodges, Ordinary!
ADMINISTRATOR’S SALE
f _ .
By virtue of an order from the
i ! Court of Ordinary of Houston
County, will be sold at public out
cry, on the first Tuesday in April
. 1942, before the court house door
- in said county between the legal
, hours of sale, the following lands-
All of town lots Numbers 178*
! 179, 180, and 181 in Block N 0,15!
' as per map of said town of Elko!
3 Houston County, Georgia; also
| lots No. 103 and 47 in Block No,
/ 13 in said town of Elko, Houston
j County, Georgia.
Said land sold for the purpose
t of paying the debts and for dis
tribution among heirs.
- This sth day of March, 1942,
John L. Davis, Administrator
Estate of Mrs. N. F. Davis,
t deceased.
?
t
Advertisement For Bids
Sealed proposals will be receiv
ed by the Board of Education of
Houston County, Ga. at the of
fice of the Board of Education at
ill o’clock a. m. EWT. on April
17, 1942, for improvements to
' j Bonaire School including the fol
lowing unils:_ Unit 1, Plumbing
Work including installation of
fixtures, septic tank, drainage
field, and water tank; Unit 11,
Painting; Unit 111, General Re
pairs and other work; Unit IV,
Equipment. Bidders may sub
mit proposals for any one or
more of the above units and—or
a combination bid for all units,
j Copies of the Plans and Speci
jfications and other proposed con
tract documents are on file and
open to public inspection at the
office of the Board of Education,
Perry, Ga., and at the office of
Dennis & Dennis, Architects, 556
Mulberry St., Macon, Ga.
A set of such documents may
be obtained from Dennis & Den
nis, Architects at Macon, Ga.,
upon deposit of $lO.OO
[ If, within the SO days after
the ultimate time set for the re
l ceipt of bids, the documents are
l returned undamaged, depositsoi
, those who submit bids will
t fully refunded and other deposits,
less the actual cost of reproduc
■ tion will be refunded.
J Each bidder will be required to
! submit with his bid a certified
j check or bid bond in the amount
t of 5% of his bid. ,
> The character and amount ot
: security required to be furnished
■ for and in connection with the
5 performance of the contract is
• stated in the proposed contrac
| documents. , f
The right is reserved to rejec
any or all bids and to waive in
formalities.
Boc rd of Education of
5 Houston County.
1 F. M. Greene, Secretary.
i
i' ' ~
! Prevents Steel Becoming
- Manganese prevents steel
. becoming brittle but it also i ncr ® ,j e
1 the milk mother rats have aval
. to nourish their babies.
, manganese in the bones of c ,
! ens results in a bone disease ..
, monly known as “slipped ten
These are only a few of the f> n
J made by University of Caliiorn i
vestigators with the aid of
active “tagged” manganese a
