—GOOD MORNING
Tuesday, July 28, 2020 | gainesvilletimes.com
LOTTERY
CASH 3
Midday: 7-8-9
Evening: 9-5-1
Drawings for Monday, July 27, 2020
CASH 4
Midday: 2-1 -6-5
Evening: 0-0-7-7
GEORGIA FIVE
Midday: 8-2-4-5-9
Evening: 5-4-1-2-5
Previous days’ drawings
FANTASY FIVE (7/26)
8-13-30-33-42
POWERBALL (7/25)
5-21 -36-61 -62 Power Ball: 18
Current jackpot: $126M
MEGA MILLIONS (7/24)
8-33-39-54-58 Mega Ball: 17
Current jackpot: $20 M
Lottery numbers are unofficial. The Georgia Lottery Corp.: 404-215-5000.
DowntownGainesville.com
MUTTS ON MAIN
DOWNTOWN GOES TO THE DOGS!
Gainesville Historic Downtown Square
Saturday, August 15th, 10 a.m. - 4 p.m.
CELEBRIS REPORT
Oscar-winning actress
de HaviUand dies at 104
Si!
Main
Street
I’m still missing the one
who got away 12 years ago
Dear Carolyn:
I screwed up and lost a terrific woman
nearly 12 years ago. I’m married with
kids now and the regret has been worked
through, therap-ized, counseled, etc.
I’ll go months without a problem and
then I’ll have a dream about
her and it all comes back, the
second-guessing, the regret, the
guilt, and it will be with me for
weeks.
My closest friends believe
I’m still in love with her. I’ve
brought it up with my coun
selor. I know that’s not fair to
my wife.
I don’t know how to work past
something that comes when I
dream about her, since that’s not some
thing I can control.
— Grieving the One Who Got Away
You can’t control the dreams, no.
But you can control how you think and
frame things when you’re awake. So you
can, for example, control how much you
indulge your impulse to keep seeing your
ex in your mind as exactly the person
you knew 12 years ago... or idealized 11.5
years ago, ahem.
She’s not that person anymore, she’s 12
years different. Same goes for you. And
the way you felt about each other then
... let’s say 12.5 years ago? That, had you
stayed together, would be long gone by
now, overwritten multiple times by the
feelings and the relationship you and she
shaped with your actions and experiences.
And, no, don’t counter with, “We would
have grown together since.” You could
also be six years divorced from her by
now, probably over some version of the
same thing that broke you up back then.
Because you did break up. You did
“lose” this person through some choice of
your own. You had your reasons, and it’s
time to be as convinced of those
as you are of your attachment to
your ex.
Short version, stop mytholo
gizing and making stuff up. Yes
it’s not fair to your wife, but it’s
also not fair to you.
And it’s not! real! So when you
have your next dream, wake up
with perspective: appreciation
for a fond memory, a mental
refresher that this is only fic
tion and only occurs subconsciously a few
times a year, and a warm hug for your
wife.
Deal?
Reader suggestions:
— Chances are you aren’t grieving/
missing this person, but the person you
were/wanted to be back then, or a dream
of your life back then. Focus on explor
ing with your therapist what that missing
piece is and see how you can attend to that
(missing sense of adventure, whatever) in
your life today.
— Soooo... you intend to compound
this mistake by screwing up and losing
another wonderful woman (aka: your
wife)?
Ah. There’s that. Thanks.
Chat with Carolyn online at noon each
Friday at www.washingtonpost.com.
CAROLYN HAX
tellme@washpost.com
Olivia de Havilland, the doe-eyed actress
beloved to millions as the sainted Melanie
Wilkes of “Gone With the Wind,” but also
a two-time Oscar winner and an off-screen
fighter who challenged and unchained Hol
lywood’s contract system, died Sunday at
her home in Paris. She was
104.
Havilland, the sister of
fellow Oscar winner Joan
Fontaine, died peacefully
of natural causes, said New
York-based publicist Lisa
Goldberg.
De Havilland was among
the last of the top screen
performers from the studio
era, and the last surviving
lead from “Gone With the Wind,” an irony,
she once noted, since the fragile, self-sacri
ficing Wilkes was the only major character
to die in the film. The 1939 epic, based on
Margaret Mitchell’s best-selling Civil War
novel and winner of 10 Academy Awards,
is often ranked as Hollywood’s box office
champion (adjusting for inflation), although
it is now widely condemned for its glorified
portrait of slavery and antebellum life.
Three directors worked on the film, stars
Vivien Leigh and Clark Gable were far
more connected on screen than off and the
fourth featured performer, Leslie Howard,
was openly indifferent to the role of Ashley
Wilkes, Melanie’s husband. But de Havilland
remembered the movie as “one of the hap
piest experiences I’ve ever had in my life. It
was doing something I wanted to do, playing
a character I loved and liked.”
During a career that spanned six decades,
de Havilland also took on roles ranging from
an unwed mother to a psychiatric inmate in
“The Snake Pit.”
She was Errol Flynn’s co-star in a series of
dramas, Westerns and period pieces, most
memorably as Maid Marian in “The Adven
tures of Robin Hood.” But De Havilland also
was a prototype for an actress too beautiful for
her own good, typecast in sweet and romantic
roles while desiring greater challenges.
Her frustration finally led her to sue War
ner Bros, in 1943 when the studio tried to
keep her under contract after it had expired,
claiming she owed six more months because
she had been suspended for refusing roles.
Her friend Bette Davis was among those who
had failed to get out of her contract under
similar conditions in the 1930s, but de Havil
land prevailed, with the California Court of
Appeals ruling that no studio could extend an
agreement without the performer’s consent.
The decision is still unofficially called the
“De Havilland law.”
She attributed her longevity to three L’s:
“love, laughter, and learning,” and displayed
a keen sense of humor — even calling her
interviewer a “rascal” for a probing question.
Queen Elizabeth II joins virtual
unveiling of portrait
Queen Elizabeth II has joined in the vir
tual unveiling of a new portrait commis
sioned by Britain’s Foreign Office to honor
her services to diplomacy.
The portrait of the monarch by Miriam
Escof et is meant to pay tribute to the queen’s
work in promoting U.K. interests all over the
world.
The queen saw the painting on her com
puter screen, and observed that a tea cup
in the portrait lacked a key ingredient:
tea. Escofet told the monarch that she had
included the insignia of the FCO on the cup.
The unveiling took place during a virtual
visit in which the monarch was told about
how the Foreign Office handled the shock
wave of the coronavirus pandemic and
brought thousands of British tourists home
from far-flung travels.
Associated Press
De Havilland
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Tuesday, July 28, 2020
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TODAY IN HISTORY
On this date:
In 1794, Maximilien Robespierre, a leading figure of the French
Revolution, was sent to the guillotine.
In 1914, World War I began as Austria-Hungary declared war on
Serbia.
In 1929, Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis was born in South
ampton, N.Y.
In 1932, federal troops forcibly dispersed the so-called “Bonus
Army” of World War I veterans who had gathered in Washington
to demand payments they weren’t scheduled to receive until
1945.
In 1943, President Franklin D. Roosevelt announced the end of
coffee rationing, which had limited people to one pound of coffee
every five weeks since it began in Nov. 1942.
In 1945, the U.S. Senate ratified the United Nations Charter by a
vote of 89-2. A U.S. Army bomber crashed into the 79th floor of
New York’s Empire State Building, killing 14 people.
In 1959, in preparation for statehood, Hawaiians voted to send
the first Chinese-American, Republican Hiram L. Fong, to the
U.S. Senate and the first Japanese-American, Democrat Daniel
K. Inouye, to the U.S. House of Representatives.
In 1976, an earthquake devastated northern China, killing at least
242,000 people, according to an official estimate.
In 1984, the Los Angeles Summer Olympics opened.
In 1989, Israeli commandos abducted a pro-Iranian Shiite Mus
lim cleric, Sheik Abdul-Karim Obeid, from his home in south
Lebanon. (He was released in January 2004 as part of a prisoner
swap.)
BIRTHDAYS
Actor Darryl Hickman is
89. Musical conductor
Riccardo Muti is 79. For
mer Senator and NBA
Hall of Famer Bill Bradley
is 77. “Garfield” creator
Jim Davis is 75. Singer
Jonathan Edwards is 74.
Actress Linda Kelsey is
74. TV producer Dick Eb-
ersol is 73. Actress Sally
Struthers is 73. Rock
musician Simon Kirke
(Bad Company) is 71.
Former CBS anchorman
Scott Pelley is 63. Alt-
country-rock musician
Marc Perlman is 59. Ac
tress Lori Loughlin is 56.
Jazz musician-producer
Delfeayo Marsalis is 55.
Former hockey player
Garth Snow is 51. Ac
tress Elizabeth Berkley
is 48. Singer Afroman is
46. Rock singer Jacoby
Shaddix (Papa Roach)
is 44. Actor John David
Washington is 36. Actor
Jon Michael Hill is 35.
Actor Nolan Gerard Funk
is 34. Rapper Soulja Boy
is 30. Pop/rock singer
Cher Lloyd is 27.
TODAY IN HISTORY PHOTO
Associated Press
Firemen and other investigators look at the damage done in an office on the 79th floor of
New York’s Empire State Building by a B-25 bomber, July 28,1945.
| The calendar of events will return at a later date.
HOROSCOPES BY HOLIDAY
ARIES (March 21-April 19).
There are certain things you
feel you know about your
future self, as you’ve had
glimpses of the person you’re
growing into. To fuel the vi
sion is in no way a rejection of
who you are now. Your vision
guides with a loving push.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20).
You like some of what’s going
on now, but you also know
that it doesn’t take too long
for “more of the same” to
feel like a trap. You’ll resist
complacency and order
something different off of the
menu of life.
GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Re
lationships are more impor
tant than whatever it is that’s
being exchanged inside them.
You don’t think of people in
terms of what they can do
for you, but some people do.
Avoid those who are gunning
for short-term gains.
CANCER (June 22-July 22). To
have a place for everything
and everything in that place
is an achievable ideal. Maybe
things will not stay that way
for long, but once established,
it’s a state that can be re
turned to with minimal effort.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Most
of the wins come from be
ing in the right headspace to
cross the goal line. The actual
movement matters less than
the mindset that’s making you
move.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). The
status quo has impressive
muscles and will flex them to
intimidate change. If you let
them, things will go back to
the way they were. What are
you willing to do to stop it?
LIBRA (Sept. 23-0ct. 23). You
receive the gift of cosmic
clarity and will be motivated
by what you learn. You’ll
identify a specific area you
could improve on, and you’ll
see an easy, workable way to
this end.
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21).
You’re committed to being
helpful, and it has only led to
better things. People value
you and will ask appropriately.
Nothing you give diminishes
you. All that you give makes
you bigger.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec.
21). Everyone stumbles, but
not everyone gets back up.
Build a fail-safe into your plan
so that when you fall down,
it will be very obvious what
you need to do next to spring
back.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
You’re ready to try a new ap
proach. You just need a good
subject. Pick either someone
who already seems up for it
or someone who so sorely
needs help that any involve
ment is a step up.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18).
Doing too many things at
once can be a method of self
sabotage. Decide where to
focus, and then be strict with
yourself. Master one skill. Get
that in your bones before you
do anything else.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20).
Have a conversation about
what the issue is. You don’t
want to waste your time dig
ging down into the wrong
place. Listen to your emotions
and they will show you just
the spot to work on.
