Georgia Historic Newspapers

    THE ATLANTA GEORGLYN AND NEWS: WEDNESDAY, JUNE 21, 1911.
THE. ATLANTA GEORGIAN
(AND NEWS)
' F. L. SEELV. Publleher.
EDWIN CAMP. Managing Bdltoi.
Published Every Afternoon
By THE ^5 X |oRGIAN L,, COMPANV.
1 At 20 East Alabama St., Atlanta. Oa.
SUBSCRIPTION RATBS:
Three Months '•?•}
Month
ly Carrier, Per Week
Telephones Connecting All Departments*! complete success.
Long Distance Terminals.
a name,- and tho the substance
has been radically changed, it
will be long beforo the name
will be. »
Kings, therefore; will bq re
tained in England because they
are needed at coronation times
and beea'use, if they should be
abolished, such occasions would
be marred in some degree.
We insist, therefore, that Ski-
bo's lord withdraw his objections
and permit the big show to be a
H. Palmer. Foreign Traveling 8*5“*"
tatlva. ear* Tho Georgian.
trouble «rtttnS.Th«
rorwiBTi nnn -vr-wm. telethon* the Cm?
tlon department end have It promptly
emedted. Bottr phone* MOO.
I Rubscrlber* dwtlrln* The
u Kewe ntwst notify '
»>n the dnte of expiration. other'*- -
ne continued nt Che rerc’**r '"T" .
mite* until notlne to stor** ■ * •
Tn ordering n chvure of A^rtre****
Ulve the old as well as the new address.
! It I. desirable thet «n .rcrnmurlcallyn.
Irfepded for numlratton In £—1? I L
hnd Tfews he limited to *«<> words In
ffnath It Is Imperative that jh*^ ^
jMrneH. aa an evidence of ■opdfwtj. ^
3eol*fi maeusoHpt* not bs returns**
t 'nlam stamps are sent for the purpo—
Thm neor-len end News nrlnta no nn-
leen or obfectfomhle iSiISfiida
. i*»-er does ft print wbhdrv or liquor oaa
. A ROSE IN DECEMBER.
•Wen can fmlmfyour motherj tha pity It,
I <• she’s gone,
Un’ her sort It loet out of Ireland, women)
-J like her there’s nonel
I tDlue were the eyee an’ kindly* toft* and
mln7her*wordt the°better*for that, an’l
-5 the quart ould eonga «het«ui»0l
•She had many a poor one’s bleuln, an »
• blettln’ she’d give galore,
Aye, a rote In December was growjn by*
her deor.
,*3ut you were all the daughter the had,
• an’ faith, ’twae Juat aa well! •
For If It wasn’t for manners now, straight
« to your face I’d tell
fThat two like you le too many, an’ one 1st
• more than enough,
but rightly I know for an ould man a talk}
i you'll care not a pinch o* snuff;
'-or looks you were never the peel of her; t
, for rernln*—I may be a fool,
Out I wouldn’t give much for the I’arnln*
that’s got at tha National School.
Young people ehoufd be conducted, but
• that’s where they’re all asthray;
h’here were none •' this loiterin' home
from fair* In Father McCarthy's day,
'Twae he would he' had their Uvea for
leea* to he would then, who but he I
Your mother he called "the flower o'
Ladye,” and none mlnde that but me;
An* ahe had the voice of a song-thrush,
but you have the laugh of a Jaj^—
loch, ehe was a roee In December, but you
are a froet In Mayl .. .
—Moira O’Neill, in MoCluro’a Magaslno.
;A Coronation and a
Strabismus.
Andrew Carnegie, resting at
Skibo castle, sent out to tho
world the announcement that the
'elaborate ceremonies of crown
ing England’s king and queen
ire a gigantic farce.
The famous steel magnate, who
,ias disposed of millions of dal-
Inrs in a manner entirely satisfac
tory and pleasing to himself, ob
ject* to money being spent for
'the pomp and show of the coro
nation.
It’s a sinful waste of monoy,
ho declares. “I, don’t know if
there will ever be another coro-
' nation, but I don’t think Eng
land will ever stand for such an
other foolish displny as this.”
! Very likely the cause of Andy’s
strictures on England’s big show
is strabismus of the point of
Mew, which, is rarely curable in
pne past middle life,
t What Andy gives away every
few days Would finance numbers
of coronations, and yet he con
siders neither his gifts nor his
philanthropies a farce or n waste
of money, albeit thby make con-
. siderable display. 4
The heaviest cost of the coro
nation will fall on the “rich
uns” who want to be present and
occupy a box, or at least an end
seat, and whose costumes, if they
can not rival those of the royal
ketors in state, can at least out
do them in stunningness.
It doesn’t cost anything to
stand in the street, watch the
parade go by, and yell, “Long
live the king!”. In fact, It’s
great fun. The English people
like it, and then it happens only
once in a generation.
If this sort of show pleases
those who scramble to attend,
why, of course, it pleases them,
and if they have money to shed,
why cavil at them preparing to
she’d it nowt
One kind of show pleases Andy
the Generous, while another kind
pleases other types of “easy
looseners.” There should be no
quarrel over questions of taste.
Andy intimates strongly that
this foolish frivolity will result
in abolishing kings- in England.
But this intimation^ is only an
other symptom of the strabismus.
Kings have already been abol
ished in England in everything
except in name; but it should be
remembered that'with a people
as conservative as are the Eng-
Bllish there is still a great deal in
Retrospective and
Prospective.
President Taft, in his speech to
the members of the Commercial
Club of Cincinnati on the occa
sion of his silver wedding, grfcw
both rctrorpacti"3 and profl-
oee'lvc. * .
lie referred to his twelve years’
absence from his native city,
during which his career, for ono
of his adipose equipment, had
been rather active and vigorous,
and spoke also, with what was
undoubtedly a sigh of relief, of
the time' when he would return
thither and resume the practice
of law.
Taft has alwqys been rather of
the judicial than of the execu
tive .temperament. It has al
ways fitted his personality better
calmly to solve the problems of
the law than to crack' the heads
I of political opponents with the
big stick of executive authority.
This quality is well illustrated
in his speech to the Cincinnatians.
“The effect that it has had upon
one’s life and character,” he said,
in referring to his eventful ca
reer, “is something that one real
izes fully, but can not explain.
Of course, there are others that
have had similar experiences, but
I venture to say that it is rather
exoeptional to include within the
limit of a little morn .than a
decade that which has happened
to me—to go from the somewhat
humdrum but always delightful
life of a judge. wh6 could retire
from public life in any sense
without being exposed to criti
cism, to a place where there
seemed to be nothing but criti
cism, but criticism was a change
that only a man who has been
thru it can fully understand.
Whatever fault thero has been
witl] Taft ns president has been
i the result of this quality: Of his
sincerity, of his unswerving hoh-
esty, and of his high aims and
purposes tho nation has never
had any doubt. Bilt in national
controversies he has' inclined to
play tha role of judge rather
than that of leader.
Of late, however, the criticisms
to which he referred and the dis
appointments that havo been his
lot have caused him to drop tp a
great egtqnt the passive attitude
and to. assume the part of tho
fighter.
The growing of tho new dispo
sition is attested by his policy
with reference to the Canadian
reciprocity bill, which has indeed
been vigorous and aggressive. Ho
forced the fighting on it, and as
a result success will undoubtedly
crown his efforts.
The nation, regardless of party,
has for President Taft on the
occasion of his silver wedding tho
heartiest good wishes, in fact,
feelings of genuine affection.
The Opening of the
Remedial Loan Bank.
The opening of the anti-loan
shark bank, organized several
weeks ago by a number of pa
triotic citizens, under tho aus
pices of the Atlanta Chamber of
Commerce, tho attended with no
fuss and feathers, nevertheless
marks an important event in the
city’* progress.
For years the loan shark evil
has flourished and grown great
in Atlanta, causing untold suf
fering and countless acts of
cruelty and injustice. Thousands
of the city’s workers*have been
caught in the toils, to their own
sorrow and to the detriment of
the city’s business and industrial
advancement.
The new bank, while surround
ing itself with all necessary
safeguards against imposition,
now offers a remedy for the evil
and relief for any worthy worker
who finds a short-time loan a ne
cessity. Atlanta is to be congrat
ulated on the opening of the
new institution.
One June coronation will prove mere
expensive than all the Jans weddings
everywhere throughout the world.
so much about Is something like the
scarcity of gold In the pockets of or
dinary cltisens?
“Weeks defends woolen company.”
The name of this congressman will And
Itself exceedingly lengthened bsfore he
will be able to convince the American
people that the wool trust le a benevo
lent and philanthropic Institution.
ALL HE COULD SEE WAS GLOOM
(Copyright, toil, by 'Star Company.)
UNCLE WALT * 'philosopher
THE BUSINESS DOCTOR
(By ROE FULKERSON
“You are badly In need of a resurrectionist." .said tho Business Doc
tor. “You don't know what I mean? This resurrectionist l» a now fac
tor In retail work, and gets hie somber title not because he Is a grave
robber, but because he pulls dead ac
counts out of the ledger and brings
them to life.
“In going over these old ledgers of
yours I have come across doxens and
dozens of accounts which were once
active, but have been closed for a
year or two. What became of those
people? I see that your gross profit
la 26 per cent and that many of these
accounts averaged 260 per month, so
that If you revived just eight of Them
In a year you could afford to pay a
man 11,200 a year for the work. A
man devoting his time to this work
could, without tho slightest doubt, res
urrect eight of them a month Instead
of a year.
“But this part of his work Is the
least part Tre Resurrectionist keeps
a regular account of the average ex-
R endltures of your customers, and when
e finds the average of any account
running down. It Is hla business to
. stir up that trade again.
"There Is nothing complicated about his methods. It's a plain, straight.
from-the-shoulder proposition. If an account has been running 260 a
month and suddenly drops off. It shows that this particular family have a
grievance of some Sort; he puts on his hat and goes to the house with the
plain, unvarnished statement that ho noticed a falling off In their trade
and that the house values their business, and he came to see If there was
any reason tor the slump. Before he leaves the house he reopens that
account Ho must And cut the cause of the trouble and rectify It. It
makes no difference whose fault It Is. It doesn’t matter tlh slightest
bit to him that the fault Is not tho fault of hlg house. He Is' there for
that account and he knows exactly what It IS worth, and so he knows
exactly what he can stand to aquaro the auetomer, and will lose a month's
profit without hatting an eyelash!
“Of course In many case* the customer had Just cause for a kick,
and thru theae kicks the Resurrectionist baa corrected many detects In
the store management, delivery systems and manners of salesmen, for a
store defect which will cause a cuatofner to quit dealing with the houee
Is one that must be corrected Instanter.
“Put a man to work on these ledgers of yours and And out why theae
people quit you. It Is true that where an account has been dead for a
year It’s almost a certain thing that ‘rigor mortis’ has set In and It can
never be brought to life; but there Is nothing more Important to your
bualneaa welfare than to know why these people quit you. Oet at the
bottom of the matter, and you will find the Information of great value
to you.
“Rvery merchant In this city Is striving for new trade land doing alt
In hla power to attract It, but It la surprising how few of them are
making any systematic effort to retain the trade they have or are keep
ing any record of the purchases of their regular customers so they con
ten whether the account Is on the Increase or decline..
“Hire a resurrectionist, by.nll means."
A thorough knowledge of "Elwcll on Bridge Whist" never helped a
stenographer to a promotion and aided her education In any way.
One of the greatest deterrents to education la the fact that It takes
the attendant at the library about ten times as long to bring a book as
It takes the waiter In the rathskeller to bring a beer.
• ■ ending June 16, os reported
• • Manufacturers Record:
The Virginia Land and
Growth and Progress
Of the New South
Bv JOSEPH B'. LIVELY.
. Additional list of Industries
formed In the South for the week
- - * -' td The
endlni
Mat
- : ; ■ Water
power Company, Byrflvllle, Vo.,
chartered with 1226,000 capital
" by Virginia and North Caro-
Itallst-
dem-
llna capitalist!
George C. BroWn St Co., Mt
phis, Tenn„ Will develop 7,000 acres
of timber land In Arkansas and
erect a band sawmill with a dally
capacity of about 40,000 foot of
lumbar.
The North Carolina Orchards
Company, Fayetteville, N. C„ was
Incorporated with 1(60,000 capital
10,000 acres of
capital ’stock
ipertles.
Drainage Dis
trict. No. s, Carrollton, Mo., award
ed contract for the construction of
canals to reclaim about 20,000 acres
of land; estimated expenditure,
1200,000.
Standard Kanawha Coal Mining
Company, Quick, W. Va„ will de
velop 2,000 acres of coal land and
plans a dally output of 1,200 tons;
Pennsylvania capitalists Incorpo
rated this company recently with
, ipeny,
km town, pa., was chartered
-- -■ to tie
_ was wiimi ib
spits] stock to
coal land in
with
_ levolop
Braxton county, W.
One of the greatest compensations about motoring
may go broke buying
that, altho you
„ __ buying the machine. It Is considered perfectly good, taste
to wear a ragged suit and a greasy cap while in the machine. The pub
lic Is always under tha Impression that this Is because you have to clean
out the machine; when In reality It Is because the machine has cleaned
you ouL
Pa., and associates were report*
as havtr — — ““
acres of
The Pl__,
Company, Piedmont. ---
organised to develop 2,000 acres of
A. Q. Little Lumber Company,
Richardson, Miss., will build sin
gle band saw mill, operated by
electric power wltha dally capac
ity of 60,000 to (0,000 feet of lum-
Colorado River Power Company,
Marble Falla. Texas, plans to con
struct several additional dams at
different locations to augment Its
Marbla Falls plant, the ultimate
development to provide 20,000
horsepower for transmission by
electricity.
. Mortimer Lumber Company, •
Bon Weir, Tenn.. will build a eaw
mill with a dally capacity of 26,-
000 feet of lumber.
Dickinson Fire Brick Company,
Buena Vlsts, Va.. will establish a
plant costing about 126,000 to redno
Onyx Company. Atlanta,
Oa.. la planning to develop onyx
properties near Knoxville. Tenn.
Dunlgan Stave and Cooperage
Company. Meridian, Ml**., was In
corporated with |30.00» capltdl
stock.
The roses and the lilies have had a heap of praise from
bards and other willies, in prose and soulful lays. The lilies
and the roses are surely good as wheat, and in their graceful
poses they’simply can’t be beat. And then the
ROSES AND lovely daisy appeals to every soul, and stirs the
poet lazy to write a rigmarole. The violet, so
THINGS modest, deep in the shady dell, would stir a
bard of sawdust, and make him dance and yell.
Oh, all the blooming flowers that make their grandstand plays,
about the garden bowers and in tho woodland ways, are splen
did in their beauty; they’re Nature’s diadem; it’s surely no
one’s duty, I say, to knock on them. In summer dawns I
greet them; they fill mo with delight; but when I come to eat
then they do not tqste just 'right. You seek them and pursue
them, their fragrance is so sweet; but when you start to chew
them, they knock you oil your feet. Their flavor’s always
flatter than tjiat of low-grade chalk; the onion, in this matter,
call beat the rose a block. Had I the pen of Bunyap I’d write
a corking book about the humble onion, that solace to the cook.
The gaudy rose can beat it at putting on the style, but when ypu
come to eat it, it leads by half a mile.
WALT MASON.
Copyright, 1211, by George Matthew Adams.
•MOMMIMMiMHHHHMOItOHHiMIHliHMIlHIIMMIHIIMMimiOMHOlHHIIIIHinlMOHIMIHHIl
| AROUND AND ABOUT GEORGIA
Their Movements,
From The Cordele Dlepatch.
The early political birds over the
state are beginning to twitter and soon
they will be darting thither and thither
after the worm that Is always elusive,
notwithstanding that old saw of a pro
verbial character.
The Atlanta 8plrit.
From The Greensboro Journal.
The Atlanta Georglan'shows tha f .
ulatlon of Atlanta to be 180,000, while
the census figures for Fulton county
are 177,712.—Elberton Star.
Why, that’s the “Atlanta spirit!"
A Riddle.
From Hebron, Montlcello News.
Here comes another riddle from ’way
back In ancient times. We want to see
If Friendship can solve It; As I walked
out I eaw unlclc, crunlcle, crontcle sit
ting under hlcktlckle, plcktlckle, pack-
tickle, present calls for the .richest doc
tor’s man to come with his flthery,
feathery fan, shoot unlclc, crunlcle,
crontcle sitting under hjcktlckle, pick-
tickle, packtlcklo present.
Large Cabbage,
From Tho Blakely News.
This editor never did have any super
stition about the number 13 and atilt
less are we likely to have any now
since Mr. S. K. Bush has brought us a
13-pound hard-head cabbage. It was
a sight to behold and shows what the
soil of Early county will do when prop
erly tickled. The only thing now lack
ing for the feast Is the ham bone with
which to "bile” the big drumhead.
Eagle Killed.
From The Sparta Ishmaellte.
On Friday Lamar Stewart killed
large eagle out at Harris mill and
was brought to town and shown here
Saturday. The colqr was brown apd
white and It mcaaured five and a half
feet front tip to tip of tho wings. It
was said to be a mountain eagle.
The Call of 8pring.
From The Madison Madisonian.
Send us some frying chickens,
are hungry—for fried chicken.
Stork Was Busy.
From The Jefferson Herald.
Mr, Ira Ethridge wants the;doctors
to stay away from his farm till he gets
his crops all laid by, and atop leaving
twin babies at his tenant houses,
boy and a girl came to the home of
Uncle Gua Shields, colored, Inst Tucs
day and the boy had an extra finger
each hand.
It It Venturesome.
From Tho Gainesville Eagle.
We eaw a certain leading cltlsen rid
Ing qver to Brenau In an ortlbeel with
a plug hat on. Now, that was ton
much. The people can stand tiding
an ortlbeel and they can stand a man
with a plug hat on, hut they can not
and will not stand both at once. It Is
too brilliant. We say that no mqn can
be elected to any office In the gift of
the people who rides In an- ortlbeel
with a plug hat on, both at once and
simultaneous.
Prohibition Snapshots
By REV. A. C. VyARD
Army-Navy Orders and Movements of Vessels
Washington, June 21,—The following
orders bavs been Issued:
Army Orders.
First Lieutenant James W. Peek,
coast artillery corps, assigned to Thlr-
‘ cbmpany. Philippine Islands.
„ - j J. F. Jnnt.la, First infantry.
detailed to algnal corpa at Fort Omaha.
Nebr.
Captain John J. Ryan, Tenth caval
ry, detailed to pay department,’ vice
Captain E. M. Suplee, paymaster, as
signed to Tenth cavalry.
Navy Orders.
Lieutenant R. B. Coffey, from New
ampehlre to navy yard, Philadelphia.
Lieutenant W. A. 8. Mead from Del-
rare to navy yard, Puget Sound.
Wash.
Lieutenant R. A. Koch from com
mand Castlne to navy yards, Norfolk,
Va.
Lieutenant L. W. Townsend from
Ammen to nary yard, Portsmouth, N.
H.
Ensign A. C, Wilhelm to duty on
Petrel.
Movements of Naval Vassals.
Arrived—Solace at navy yard. New
York: Delaware at Portsmouth, Eng
land; Mars at Guantamtmo; Tacoma
at navy yard. New Tork;’ Dolphin at
New York city; Supply at’Guam.
Sailed—Standlsh from Norfolk for
Annapolis; Dubuque from Montreal for
Detroit; Smith, Flusher, Lamsnn. Pres
ton and Reid from Boston for Province-
town; Paulding, Drayton. McCall. Roe
and Terry from Newport for Province-
town.
The services In the chapel of a certain
’ ’erslty are from time to time
eminent clergymen of many
denominations and from many cities.
On one occasion, when one of these vis
iting divines asked the president of the
university how long he should speak, that
witty officer replied:
"There Is no limit, doctor, upon the
time you may preach: but I may tell you
that there Is a tradition here that the
most souls are saved during the first 36
minutes."
■■ sailor?" asked the
wanderer at the gate.
"Poor old sailor? echoed the lady at
work at the tub.
■Yes’m, I fullered the wotter for six-
years."
A Poor Adviser.
From The Christian Advocate.
Skinflint—I have no money, hut 1 wfU
give you a little advice.
Beggar—Well. If yer haln’t got no
money yer advice can’t he very valuable.
Pari.: Ky„ has 31 saloon keepers who
are planning to’form . combine and close
up all but three saloona Their object Is
to save the 11,040 license each on the
eighteen saloons as well as the expense of
running them. The plan contemplates
equal partnership on the port of the 21
saloon ktepera. > .
of Hunnswell. Kan., will see to It that uiu
pool rooms of that town are well regu
lated. She Intends to have them run so as
to be harmlfot to young men.
The brewery of the Tuscaranae Valley
Brewery Company, located at Canal
Dever, Ohio, waa sold at public outcry
April 22 under a bankruptcy claim. ’
There seems to be some crooked work
among tha so-called near-beer saloona In
Atlanta. Two negroes, Alex Jones and
Bill Williams, were arrested for operat
ing a saloon on Petsrs-slt recently, it,de
veloped that tha permit to run the saloon
was Issued to W W McNInch, a whlta
man.
Local option does not work at all well
In Massachusetts. In the past ten years
drunkenness has Increased m that state
•0 per cent, while the population of the
state haa only Increased 20 per cent.
Brewers In Missouri are forbidden by
ind operate saloons, yet The
Time* states that out of 602
anaas City 420 are owned by
no Drawers.
The Wholesale Liquor Dealers associa
tion of Oregon haa sent out a secret ap'
peal to every liquor dealer, urging tha.
Immediate steps be taken to dsfeat worn-
: state, Each saloon
taka not. less than 26
voters to the polls on election day.
After tho police had made a raid on
They had not heard of tho
will bo used aa witnesses.
each other In case the officers art around.
The police are beglnnln/r to learn tho sig
nals and lively times will no doubt follow.
Kansas is remarkable for the fact that
lere are 500.000 young men and women
?er 31 year* old who have never aeon a
iloon In that state. There is not m
..anaas newspaper which oublishes liquor
advertisements. One-third of the counties
In the state have not a prisoner in Jail
nor a pauper in their poorhouaes.
Daily Health Chat
BY Alt ATLANTA PHYSICIAN.
THE LEFT-HANDED CHILD.
Of theories to explain, ieft-hand.<l
ness there are many; but perhaps the
most generally accepted one Is that In
most persons the portion of the brain
controlling tho right arm Is mors high
ly developed than Bte portion contrail
Ing the loft; but that In left-handed
pontons the comparative development
? f the two sides, of the brain Is re-
ersed, so that the part responsible for
the left arm Is best developed. Inas-
mpeh os most of the nerves passing
from the brain to the body cross at the
back of the brain, wa know, of course,
that the left side of the brain Is con
nected with the right elde of the body
and vice versa. Lombroao held that
left-handedness was more common In
criminals than in non-crlmlnal per’
sons, but this belief has been quee
tlonsd. We can not attribute left
handednoaa tb tha affect of artificial
modea of life, because now and then
monkeys are found to be left-handed.
"A Berlin physician," says a leading
medical contemporary, "has recently
Studied 18,000 children of the Berlin
common schools from this point of
view. To control so many cases he
made use of a circular letter addressed
to the parents, who were requested to
designate which hand the child used
for writing, eating, playing, working,
etc.; also, the presence 6r absence of
any hereditary element, whether the
child alept on the left or right side or
back, and whether the condition de
veloped during tho school ags. It was
found that over 05 per cent of children
were right-handed, the girls having a
slight superiority in this respect. Less
than 6 per cent were therefore left
handed; There were but 27 ambldex
ters In the entire number (0.21 per
cent). Direct or collateral ancestry of
left-handed children shows that about
one case In three has an hereditary
element Tho statistical evidence
shows very plainly that right-handed
children tend to sleep on tho right side,
and left-handed children on the left
side.
"There Is no evldenoe that a left
handed child la In any # way handi
capped )n regard to ability to earn his
living, altho It Is something of A hard
ship for him to learn right-handed
writing. The watchword of the day la
not to antagonize left-handedness, but
to develop left culture In the right-
handed and right culture In the left-
handed, or relative ambidexterity.”
WINNOWED WITTICISMS
The Minute Men.
From The Toledo Blade.
Tommy—My gran’pa wus In' th’ Civil
war. an' he lost a leg or a arm In every
battle he tit In!
Johnny—Gee! How many battles waa
he In?
Tommy—About forty.
Th# Tsst
From The Christian Advocate.
. "Dee yo' belteb dat Jim Johnson am
realty converted?"
" 'Deed I does. I'se bln visitin’ hla
house fo’ de last free months, air day
hasn't bad a mouthful ob chicken.”
Manager—Well, strike out "have nerve
to" and “worthlesa " and put the letter In
our testimonials.
iterday In <
all game.
a dead.”
wife’s mother was dead.
I think you are mistaken, t heard what
he said."
’’Then what was It?"
“He laid he would tike to attend hla
mother-in-law's funeral."
A Little Outing.
Manager (calling out to girls in nest
room)—Is there any one here who would
like to epend a day In tho country?
From Tha Houston Post
"But It seems to take all your patients
a long time to get well, doctor.”
les. but aa soon aa I begin to get a
larger practice I can afTonT to let my
patients get well quicker."
From Tha Totedo*Btade’’
The Girl—What’s your opinion of wom
en who Imitate men?
The Man—They’re Idiots!
The Girl—Then the Imitation Is suc
cessful.
Americans Abroad.
From Llpplncolt's.
A number of tourists were ’recently
looking down the crater of Vesuvius. An
Amsrtcan gentleman aald to hla coni
ng, said to another:
Good gracious! How these American
do travel.
J