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WHERE THE LAUGH COMES IN.
Knocking ths Boom Clean Out of a Sensa
tional Divorce Case.
Detroit Free Press.
He was coining down the street with a
broad grin on his face, when an acquaint
ance halted him and inquired if he had
made a strike.
"I just have !” was the reply, followed up
by a hearty laugh. “My wife and I haven’t
lived happily for the last year, and she has
made up her mind to apply for a divorce.”
“Has she ? Why, that’s too bad I”
“You wouldn’t think so if you knew her
She expects me to fight the proceedings, you
kno. She is going to allege cruelty on my
part, and for the last two weeks has been
working up scary to show the jury. She’s
torn up a bonnet, and will have the pieces
to show what a bad temper I have. She’s
cut the buttons ofi her dress, and will have
i t in court as an evidence of my tyranny.
She’s going before a jury to swear that I
threatened her life on several occasions, and
She’s got two servants to remember that I
once cut her corset strings with a butcher
knife. She’s calculating on a big sensa
tion and a crowed court room. Ha! ha! ha!”
“But where does the laugh come in ?”
"Why, I skip the town for Denver to
night, and she’ll have to pay her own law
yer and get her bill without sensation. The
papers wont give it three lines —there’ll be
no jury to see the scars —no lady spectators
to weep—no boom to float her into the mar
ket on. If you want to see the maddest
woman in the State of Michigan just drop
s ound to-morrow and ring my front door
bell—he! he ! he!”
A D aigerous Affectation.
—Mrs. B. “Oh, you must not appear so
acute of hearing. It is the fashion now to
pretend t o be a little deaf.”
Mrs.C.—“Wei 1 , well! What affectation
will be started next? But I shan’t follow
that custom.”
“Oh! but you must. We all do, you
know.”
“ Well, I shan’t, especially at Mrs. Blank’s
party to-night, and I advise everybody else
not to.”
“ But why ? ”
“ Because she always gets her daughter to
khow off at the piano, and I don’t want the
young torturess to think she’s got to use the
loud pedal all the time.”
One reason why Hunt's [Kidney andLiver]
Hemeey is so popular for the cure of diseases
of the kidneys, Liver and bladder, Is that it
allows immediate improvements in the con
dition of the patient, and recovery is steady
and certain. Its cures have been so wonder
ful th:il physicians of all schools prescribe it
t i their practice.
Too Many to the Acre.
Our crop of Overcoats has been too plenti
ful lor t his season, and as the weather proph
ets predict mild weather for next year—lßßs
and ’86 —we have decided not to burn our stock,
but to put them oh the market, and sell them
for what they will bring. Our Overcoats must
be sold. It is only a question for you if you
will take advantage of our low prices and
supply yourself with an. Overcoat, and save
money. We will sell you a good, strong 89
Overcoat for 86, a sls Overcoat for 812, and
the finest S3O Overcoat in Savannah for S2O.
Boys’ Overcoats, from 4 to 12 years old, as low
as $3, Youths' Overcoats, from 12 to 17 years,
from $5 up. We have plenty of fine Sults on
hand which we will sell at greatly reduced
prices. Rememberand buy of the “Ftwaous,”
as we give a prize of half the purchase money
to every twentieth purchaser. “Flmioms'
New York Clothing House, 140 Congress
afreet.
Ripge, Mclntosh County, Ga.
Dr. J. Bradfi Id—Dear Sir: I have taken
■several bottles of your Female Regulator for
f alling of tile womb and other diseases com
bined, of 16 years standing, and 1 really be
lieve I am cured entirely, for which please ac
cept my heartfelt thanks and most profound
gratitude. I know your medicine saved my
life, so you see I cannot speak too highly in
in its favor. I have recommended it to sev
eral of my friends who are suffering as I was,
Y’ours, very respectfully,
MRS. W. E. STEBBINS.
Treatise on the Health and Happiness of
Woman mailed free.
Bradfield Regulator Co.,
Box 28. Atlanta, Ga.
PILES 1 PILES!! PILES !!!
Sure cure for blind, bleeding and itching
piles. One box has cured the worst cases ol
t wenty years’ standing. No need to suffer
five minutes after using Williams’ Indian
Pile Ointment. It absorbs tumors, allays
itellings, acts as poultice, gives instant relief.
Prepared only for piles, itching of the pri
vate parts, nothing else. Hon. J. M. Coffen
bury, of Cleveland, says: “1 have used scores
of pile cures, and it affords me pleasure to
say that I have never found anything which
gives such Immediate and permanent relief
as Dr. Williams’ Indian Pile Ointment.” Sold
by druggists and mailed on receipt of price,
81. Sola wholesale and retail by 0. Butler,
Savannah, Lippman Bros., wholesale and re
tail druggists.
Mrs. Rosa Shumate, Savannah, «ays : “1
have used Brown’s Iron Bitters with good
result,. For dizziness and impure blood it
it is unequaled.
THE HARNETT HOUSE, SAVANNAH,
Visitors to Savannah, Ga., will find the
Harnett House a comfortable and desirable
Stopping place, where the charges are mod
erate, while the uniform excellence of the
Cable is a subject of general remark-.-Chi
s?ago National Hotel Reporter.
Mrs. L Bandy, O iver street, near West
Broad street, Savannah, says: “My mother
end I have taken Brown’s Iron Bitters for
Headache and general debility witli very
beneficial results.”
Look for General Lee’s picture on each
package of Favorite Cigarettes.
Mr. J. J. Carpenter, Augusta, Ga, says:
My experience from the use of Brown’s
3 ron Bitters for indigestion has been such
that I consider it a ■blessing to humanity.”
.There is no smoke so nice as Favorite Ci
arettes.
' Mrs. George Chambers, 188 McDonough
street, Savannah, says: “I suffered from
dyspepsia. Brown’s Iron Bitters completely
restored my health. It also cured my son
of the samecomplairit!”
’Favorite Cigarettes—just what you want
py them.
Mr, E. L. Sollee, Chatham Academy,
i- avannah, says: “I derived very benefical
-results from the use of Brown’s Iron Bit- \
ters’”
Cipan teeth, head by cums and a pure I
s<reatli by using Holmes' Wash and Deiiti- |
'rice. Tryabottje
Mr. T-. A. Easorr;-Savannah, says: “I .
suffered front weakness followed by severe :
illness. Brown’s Iron .Bitters gave me !
Strength.”
To be convinced call around and see L.
Hried’s before making your purchases else
where, as the price aZfd quality of goods sells
itself.
Favorite Cigarettes are-inlld, sweet and ver
THE SAVANNAH DAILY TIMES, TUESDAY, DECEMBER 30, 1884.
MOTHERS’
FRIEND!
I This !• valuable prepa
ration is truly a triumph
of scientific skill, and no
more inestimable benefit
was ever bestowed on the
mothers of the world,
not only short
enstne time of labor and
lessens the Intensity of
pain, but, better than all,
it greatly diminishes the
danger to life of both
mother and child, and
leaves the mother in a
condition highly favor
able to speedy recovery,
and far less liable to i
Hooding, convulsions and
other alarming symptoms
incident to lingering and
painful labor. Its truly
wonderful efficacy in
this respect entitles the I
Mothers’ Friend to be
ranked as one of the life
saving appliances given
to the world by the dis
coveries of modern sei
once.
From the nature of the
case it will of course be
understood that we cannot
publish certificates con
cerning the Remedy with
out wounding the delicacy
of the writers. Yet we
have hundreds of such
testimonials on file, and
no mother who has once
sed it will ever again be
without it in her time of
trouble
No More Terror’.'
1
No More Pain I
I
; No More Danger!
TO
Mother or Child.
I
1 The Dread of
j
’ Motherhood
Transformed to
HOPE
and
JOY.
Safety and Ease
TO
Suffering Woman.
I
. A prominent physician lately remarked to the
proprietor, that .if were admissible to make public
the letters we receive, the‘'Mothers’Friend” would
outsell anything on the market.
> I most earnestly entreat every female expecting to
) lie confined, to use Mothers’ Relief. Coupled with
this entreaty I will add that during a long obstetri
-1 cal practice(forty-four years, I have never known it to
' fail to produce a safe and quick delivery.
11. J. HOLMES., M. D., Atlanta, Ga.
i
j Send for our Treatise on “Health and Happiness of
‘ Woman,” mailed free.
BiiADrtELD Regulator Co., Atlanta, Ga.
) “.tUA -I-lb -W
000000
Pipe smoking is the real test of a tobacco.
It is tho regal way of smoking. You got
more directly at the flavor and fragrance.
You take the smoke cooler, and the tonic
cleanlier and safer. Pipe smoking is
smoking reduced to a fine art.
The more the question of adulterated
tobacco forces itself on the attention of
smokers, the more desirable it becomes
to know precisely what you are smoking.
In Blackwell’s Bull Durham Smoking To
m,i,i bacco you have a guarantee,
• always, that it is Nature’s
own unadulterated product.
Its fragrance, flavor, and
unsurpassed quality, are de
jd rived from the soil and air.
Try it, and you will be sat
iafad. None genuine with
’’W®' out tra de-mark of the Bull.
Mw All successful Fishermen and Sports
fflSl men smoko Blackwell’s Bull Durham
Smoking Tobacco, and they enjoy it.
ft
■> Sr
■LSIC IL
W~ISS EMMA E ASON, 12% Marga
ret street, Savannah, says: I took
Brown’s Iron Bitters as a tonic with great :
’ benefit. My system was greatly impaired
from chills and fever.
“ < <?,
ft"*
From experience I think Swift’s Specific is
a very valuable remedy forcutancous diseases,
and at the same time an invigorating tonic.
James Jackson, Chief Justice of Georgia.
Atlanta, September, 1884.
INOCULATED POISON.—After trying all
the other remedies, Swift’s Specific has cured
me sound and well of a terrible blood poison
contracted from a nurse.
Mrs. T. W. Lee, Greenville, Ala.
POISON OAK.—A lady here has been en
ti rely cured of poison-oak poison by the use
of two bcttles S. S. S.
R. S. Bradford, Tiptonville, Tenn.
ULCERS 25 YEARS.—A member of my
church has been cured of an ulcerated leg of
25 years standing, with two bottles of Swift’s
Specific. P. H. Crumpler,
Pastor Methodist Church, Macon, Ga.
Swift’s Specific is entirely vegetable. Treat
ise on Blood and Skin Diseases mailed free.
The Sw’ift Specific Co., Drawer 3, Atlanta,
. Ga., or 159 W. 23d st., N. Y.
“COALI“
Fresh from tho Mines,
PROMPTLY DELIVERED.
Full and liberal wel<fht guaranteed. Orders
by mail, telephone or given to our drivers
promptly attended to.
Knickerbocker Ice Co.,
144 BAY STREET.
PANSY PkAATS.
50 CENTS PER DOZEN.
VIOLET PLANTS, 25c. per dozen.
CHRYSANTHEMUM PLANTS, $1 per dozen.
VERBENA PLANTS, 75c.per dozen.
LILY, STAR OF BETHLFTHEM, 25c. per doz.
. LILY. EASTER PLANTS, $1 per dozen.
CUT FLOWERS AND DESIGNS.
At Wagner’s Nursery,
Thunderbolt Road, or
Cr A R J > IV ER’S.
80X Bull Street.
GEO.M. HELJiKENq
Variety Uakery,
i Cor. South Broad and East Broad streets.
BREAD, CAKES and PIES of all descrip- ;
tion.
i
CHRISTMAS CAKES a specialty. Wed- ]
ding Parties supplied on reasonable term s, <
Eluant k’c Sugar loil
PINEAPPLES !
Large M Mow hums!
Malaga Grapes!
FANCY APPLES
Preserves of all Kinds I
ms, W M ®
NUTS AND RAISINS,
Currants, Figs, Dates, Prunes, &c.
The above goods for sale only to the trade
by
J. B. Reedy
Grocer and Importer of Fruit,
BAY AND WHITAKER. STREETS
ORANGES!
ORANGES!
Don’t you want a box of
NICE ORANGES?
I am HEADQUARTERS for the FINEST
ORANGES GROWN IN FLORIDA.
The Celebrated
Indian River, Crescent City, “San
Souci”
Ind Other Choice Varieties.
And have in store and on the way 1,000
BOXES for the
Holiday Trade.
AP r i ILS !
Arriving this week 500 barrels Choice BALD
WIN'S, SPY’S and BLUE PERMAINS,
Banannus, Raisins,
Cocoanuts, ZNnts,
Potatoes,
BUTTER, CHEESE,
Ke* All fresh stock and for sale low.
E. E. Cheatham,
IO! Bay Street.
Telephone No. 273.
ORANGES!
Oranges !
Oranges !
500 Boxes Selected Florida
Oranges !
For the Holiday Trade.
300 BARRELS CHOICE APPLES,
100 BOXES SELECTED PEARS,
100 BASKETS GRAPES in 5 and 10ft Baskets,
100 Sacks VWglnla Hand-picked PEANUTS,
LOWEST BOTTOM PRICES.
43-Now Landing and for sale at
W. D. SIMKINS,
Bay.
Florida Oranges!
CANARY BIRDS AND CAGES,
GARDEN SEEDS.
Fancy and Useful Baskets,
Alligator Jewelry,
Curiosities, Etc., at
Gardner’s,
BULL STREET.
GUNS
—AND—
CUTLERY.
ROGERS’ and RUSSELL’S
Fine Table Knives,
Fine Carvers and
Steels, in Sets.
A full line of Fine Pocket Knives.
A full line of Fine Scissors.
«3=Tbe largest stock of BREECH-LOADING
Guns and IJitles
Ever offered in Savannah.
IKS* For sale Low by
palmer bbos.
148 Congress and 151 St. Ju.ian street.
PRINTER’S
ROLLERS!
THOMPSON’S
Scuta ' Msr Coapcfc!
Tlieonly reliable COMPOSITION made for
theUOUTHERN CL T MATE.
4S*Compositlon by the Pound or made into
Rollers at short notice.
A. D. THOMPSON,
93X Bay Street Savannah, Ga
MB. WM. C. WORKMAN, 110 Bay street, Sa
1U van nan, says: For two years I suffered
from malaria and its dreadful effects, my
physician rendering me on'y temporary re
lief. In Brown’s Iron Bitters I found de-1
elded and permanent benefit. I
CARPETS
U, Mail mi Id!
0
' Wilton Velvets at $1 50 per yard.
Body Brussels at $1.30 per yard.
Tapestry Brussels at 80c. per yard.
Three-Plys at 92c. per yard.
Ingrains ranging from 25c. to 75c. per yard.
These prices are not only Equal, but Less than those of any Qrstr-class New York House.
Smyrna Rugs and Mats from 81.25 to 85.00 each. A full line of French Canton Mattings on
hand.
I Would Respectfully Call Attention to My*®»
NEW FALL STOCK
OF
DRY GOODS!
In which will be found Everything Fresh and Desirable for the Approaching Season—Silks,
Satins, Brocades, Velvets, Velveteens, Cashmeres, Flannels and Fancy Dress Materials in
Great Variety. Black and Colored Silks and Satins have been selected with special care, and
the Low Prices at which they are offered should command the attention of Cash Buyers.
DEPARTMENT
Has been thoroughly filled with French and English productions.
Courtland’s Celebrated English Crapes and Veils a pecialty.
500 Boys’ Knee Pants Suits ranging in prices from 82.00 to 810.00.
350 Misses’ Worsted Suits, sizes 2 to 14 years, and prices from 81.00 to 810.00.
banieiThogan,
Southeast Corner Broughton and Barnard Streets.
/// n’lq I\\\ \ \
Copyright, H. Solomon & Son.
THE LATEST IMPROVED
EXTRA. PATENT HOLLER PROCESS FLOUR
MAKES EXCELLENT BREAD AND CAKES.
#3* At;wholesale by
HEINEtY SOLOMON <fc SON,
SAVANNAH, GA.
100/1 A MERBY CHRISTMAS IQQE
IQUI AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR! lUUU
TO ALL THE PATRONS
Cohen’s Central Shoe Store.
AND WISH TO CALL THEIR ATTENTION TO THE IMMENSE STOCK OF
Boots and Shoes!
Which we will Sell for the NEXT TEN DAYS at.. .
Extraordinary Eow Prices !
And also ask an exaniinatidri ot an elegant a sortment'of PLAIN and FANCY '
Slippers I Slippers’ Slippers I
Which are to fie sold without resePre. Bear al So in mind that to .each and every purchaser
will a HANDSOME CHROMO !Na business card. ...
COHEN’S CENTRAL SHOE STORE
Southwest Corner Broughton and Barnard Streets.
YfR. OWEN W. FLYNN, Liberty street, Sa. I
jdl yannah, say«: I took Brown’s Iron Bit-
ters with good results and advise others who
I would have good health to follow my course |
AIRS. EMMA C. DUGGON, River street,
bi Savannah, says : I heartily endorse
Brown’s Iron Bitters as a first-class tonic. It
increased my weight nearly fifty pounds, I
FAINTS, OILS, ETC.
Mantels, Mantels, Mantels
Call ■ :d examine my stock of Artistic
Slate, Iron and Wooden Mantels
Before Purchasing Elsewhere,
I am offering at very low prices a full stock
of
BOOBS, SASHES,
Blinds, Mouldings,
Stair Rails, Balusters, Newell Posts,
PAINTS, OILS, VARNISHES,
Railroad, Steamboat, Ship and
Mill Supplies,
Window Glass,
Putty, Brushes, &c.» &c.
Also, a full line of Building, Hardware,
Lime, Plaster, Hair and Cement, Plain and
Decorative Wai! Paper.
ANDREW HANLEY,
Corner Whitaker, York and President sts.
OLIAI2RS
Paint and Oil Bonse,
SASH, DOORS, BLINDS,
Moulding, Etc
IRON WORKS & BOILER MAKERS
Novelty Iron Works,
No. 2 Ba” and River Streets.
SAVANNAH, GA.,
John Rourke, Proprietor,
ha & Brass Mr; H achinehops
I am prepared to do all kinds of
Machine, Boiler & Blacksmith Work
Can also furnish at shortest notice and at
lowest market prices all kinds and sizes of
Iron and Brass Castings, Pulleys, Shafting,
etc. Saw Mill work a specialty. Manufac
turer of
Sampson Sngar Mills and Pans.
Estimates furnished on all kinds of New
Work and Repairs.
Wm. W. Gnann,
— AND —
Ilith 1 .!:
EIOBSESBOEIIVG
AND GENERAL JOBBING.
Has now on sale 4 fine GROCERY or
COTTON WAGONS, all with steel axles
md tires. Also a large lot of OAK and ASH
LUMBER.
give him a call.
ALL WORK GUARANTEED.
Nos. 6 & 8 New St., near West Broad
SAVANNAH, GA.
MRS. A. E. PALMER, Savannah, says : I
41 used Brown’s Iron Bitters as a tonic, and
sincerely believe It to be the best made. It
Imparts great strength.
(SduratUnal.
M ol Practical Moigs I
Phono<iraj)liy,
Typewriting-,
Telegraphing,
Bookkeeping,
Penmanship.
No. 137 Bay street, Savannah, Ga.
Mb. and Mrs. C. S. RICHMOND,
Principals.
» ORIGINAL
iwwr
1 I
slros.C.WlHams St-Co. I
V WiCriMONO.VA- _ j
* FOR SALE BY
non i st,
Corner Bryan & AberconSls.
SAVANNAH, - - - GA.
R. ISAAC! MUINTOSH, Savannah, says:
-LVM. For years I have suflefed from dys
pepsia, trying everything with .the hope of
obtaining relief. Brown’s Iron Bitters cured
me andTTßinrtlly recommend it.
Advertisements are only dodges to foolyou
I around, but not the case at L. Fried’s, for
once a call will Induce many more, as his
pilces are low and the best goods for the
east money.