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170 THE ATHENAEUM Cream Sailor: Oh. yes, I write short stories. I contribute to Collier’s and the Post. Seasick man: That’s nothing. I contribute to the Atlantic. ********* Sue: Did you get that date with that telephone operator? Due: Naw, her line was busy. ********* Kindly old gent: I’m sure sorry you buried your wife, Jim. Jim: Well what the devil did I want to keep her for? ********* Brother I: What do you think of the new pledges? Brother II. Shut up. I’m trying to stop cursing. Why are your fraternity brothers all so thin? Every time they hear the dinner bell, they think it’s the patrol wagon. "Where’s your mother, son?” asked the hungry father. “She said that if you go out and sow what people call your wild oats, she’s going out and raise what Sherman called war,” replied the innocent youngster. Said the naughty little flea, As he lit on Mary’s knee. "Where do we go from here, boys, Who Said it First Where’s the fire? Nero Who the Hell wants to know? The Devil May I have the next dance? St. Vitus Boy, ain’t that a knockout? Jack Dempsey Where do we go from here? Leob and Leopold Here lies the remainder of Ivor E. Head, His dome was soft, you bet- He took both hands from off the wheel To light a cigarette. —John Pittman, *26.