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the
CENTRAL GEORGIAN
PUBLISHED WEEKLY
11 v
j(>riN N« GILMORE, Proprietor.
qFFICK in masonic building
SandkrsvillEj Ga.
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BUSINESS € Alt
IN POLITICS, CONSEX VATIVE; IN RELIGION, CATHOLIC ; IN MATERIAL INTERESTS, PROGRESSIVE-
jSTo. 28
SANDEESVILLE, GA., JULY SO, 1870.
VOL. XXIV.
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Georgia
J. C. GAIXA11ER,
Attorney at La-w,
San<lersville
Apr'I 13, 1870. 11—tf
H S S’. GILMOliE, H. D. P. TWIGGS.
GILMORE & TWIGGS.
Till - ' undersigned having associated t ho in solve?
. ,„»her iA the practice «-f the Law, will attend the
t’L-uit. ,v.,il the OOUMtlCDOl
; N ; Tk'm= ,,n * Laurens and Glasscock.
)•. L. WARTHEN
•Attorney ttt £«tr;
SANDERSVILLE, GA.
si.isto 5 -»y
LAXIrMALL & EVANS
attorneys at law,
SANPFKSVILLE,
GA.
attend the Courts of Washington, Wil
.’ ‘ Emanuel, Jefferson. Johnson, lianeockam
l" 1 '--iis counties. Office on the Public Square op
Setho Court House.
AK ll S. I.XNGMADEj j
Jan. 3, 18*0.
[bkveult i>. kvass,
1-ly
MU-0 G. HATCH,
9*
A-ttornejr at Ldaa t
SamkmilU', Ga.
Office in Court House
Office
In A
next door to Post
Jan. 1
11KN11Y D. CAPERS,
Attorney at Law,
SAVANNAH, ga.
Office: GJ I)ration S'ireet.
Mav 4.1870. tf
JMMV.IL WHITAKER,
DBIsTTIST,
SANDERSVILLE, GA.
Terms POSITIVELY Cash.
B U S I N E S S CARDS. i BUSINESS CARD S.
s. K. BOTH WELL.
TV. R. WOODBRIDGE,
ROTH WELL & WOODBRIDGE
COTTON FACTCSs,
AND
General Commission
MERCHANTS,
7-i BAY STREET,
SAVANNAH,
-■tug. 19, 1809.
GEORGIA.
iy
ALFRED II. COI.gi lT, JAMES DAGCS, III OH It. COLQUITT
Baker County, New nan, («a. .Savannah, Ca.
COLQUITT & BAGG’S,
COTTON FACTORS
AND
General Commission Merchants
Bay Street, Savannah, Georgia.
Special attention to the sale of Cotton, Lumber
and Timber. Liberal advances on Consignments.
June 9, ib70. 25—ly
CARPETS,
OIL CLOTHS
MATTINGS,
LACK CURTAIN AND SHADES-
Il'Oli.
Hone
JLoui
Promptly
Rates,
nl
July 28, In0
■>A — 1V
r.HSLl'.Y, JR.
mSLEY & MORRIS,
General Dealers in
IKRCIIAiYMS'E,
S W A I N s B 6 R O,
LATHRQP fr €0.
Feb. 23, 1870.
G A.,
of
POODS given in e v change joe nil kind
r* Country Produce.
Liberal advances made on Cotton and IV ool
iousigned to them fox shipment.
June 8, 1870. ' tf
MARI) M JHITIf,
Manufacturer and Dealer in
TilsT WARE,
SANDERSVILLE, GEORG I A.
JOHN M. COUfliR & c
Corner \V hitnkcr ce St..) ulion Streets,savannah
1.1 le dial Itetml Deaims i?i
boohs & si vnpa?t\ all kinds,
COF\lNG iltSEAl. 1‘KEa‘SES, FEN knives,
News & Book Printing Paper & ink,
GOLD FENS, FEN AND FEJJOIL CASES.
I.edffer
Of all
Playing, Visiting & Printers' Cards, &c-
Jijnkx Ordered'or />,,tZried,at Jut? Y»rk IDl'i
.jolni M.Cooper. Ceorge T. Quantock.
Alex. C. X. Smett'. '
J. n, 25, 1S7U. G.m
r, Writing & Colored Papers
kind* and sice■* foe IJ’uijcand -Jub Work,
New Music.
ng C.Q ots.
i l.L kinds of work \
litr. Ac., dotieuAsli
Vullnving i:; town u
fcdto.
Mere!.:; up
lal Aiafliv (
IV Filers
W’4 137'
i Tin, ftopper. Sheet Iron,
>rt notice. Ki.oiing.Gulter-
• eountry, promptly utten-
uiUiie supplied willi Ware of tiic
ii the most reasonable terms.
fe.J. Dunbar.
Henry A. StulU
J. DUNBAR & CQ.,
Importers and Dealers in
fMV.NUHiS, WHISKIES, WINES
SEG.VRS, TOBACCO, Ac.
147 Bay St beet,
SAVANNAH, GEORGIA,
W, 1870. 2-tf
I L. FALK & Co,,
—ONE FK1CE—
Wholesale ami Rclgil;
lothing Warehouse,
No. 147 Congress »feli7 St. Julien Streets,
SUWANNAII, GA.
large Assortment of Furnishing Goods, Hats,
Trunks, Valises, &c., always on band.
l*»uf;ietory, 4-4 JUuriy Street,'New York,
"■ods made to order at the shortest notice,
•unary 19, 1370. 8—ly
t & DEi’PISH,
Wholesale and Refill
DEA.L^R-S: I|N
adware, Rubber Belling* Agri-.
cultural Implements,
^°Wder, Shot, Caps and Lead,
Congress and Q7 St. Julian St?.,
, XxANNAII, GEORGIA.
^ si). 1870. " ly
On the Bea.-h of Long Branch, (-oirtic
The (iay young Clerk in the Dry-Gooil Mon*,
Comic song, 40
r<l wiir Broyidn, sacred song, 50
• >! LVine back tome, iliysti Htcd Title
The 1
Man
40 ets,
A heart that beats only for thee, illustrated
Title song 40 ets.
Katy McEcrrnn, i jMstmtcd Title song, 4.0 ets.
You’ve been a iricnd to me, iriuslnited Title
song,
Tassels on the Boot.*, col
Uj> in a Ha boon, l .
U ! let me kiss the Baby,
Music som o-y maiI, }»<
the }trice unii^cd.
40 ets.
50 ets.
5o ets.
paid, on receipt ol
HERMANN
Beak and
SAVANNAH,
March 3", 1370.
L. SCHREINER,
Music Dealer, #
- GEORGIA.
32-ly
^oli3,1, Oliver,
and Glazier,
II
W hitaker Street, Savannah, Ga]
Dealer in
iNies, Doors, Blinds,
^Hidings, Paints,
S GLASS, PUTTY,
fisr . fluc ' Glaziers’ Material. Mixed
A s< ., .' oi R h Colors and Shades.
ly
JUilNILUiD liliOS. & CO,,
W liiiles^ie Dealers in
Boots,Shoes,flats,
Ready Made CIp,thing,
GENTLEMAN'S
FUIiNGIiiKG GOODS,
> kl, Broughton.Street,,■
•SAVANNAK, GEORGIA-
H. MeINIIARO, \ OFFr.CE,
S. M MSHABn’j \ 8 1 «R 82 W I'''*® St.
E. A. VVfcLL. J NEW lijon^.
,/an. 19, 187f. 3 tf
Dayaiit, Wapjics & Co.
FACTORS,
—AND—
Commission Jflerehmils.,
savannah,
PULASKI MOUSE,
SAVANNAH, - - - - GEORGIA.
Wiltberger & Carroll,
PROPRIETORS.
Jan. 19. 1870.
3-1 y
Gko. F.J’ai.mks, W. (J. JjYon,
of Savannah,Ga. ofSuvaimuh,G;
Kstahlislicd 1S50.
1). J. Botiiwki.l,
.. of 1 >ooly Co.,G:i.
Special.
PALMES & LYON
Wholesale G rocers
AND
COMMISSION MERCHANTS,
V. B. Corner Bag and Barnard Streets,
SAVANNAH, Ga,
All". 25, 1S«9. 34—tf
E. M. Coken, Jr.,
Mnnufticluier of
Saddles, Harness and Trunks,
And Wholesale and Retail Dealer in all kimla of
SADDLERY WARE,
Corner of Whitaker and Bryan Streets,
SAVANNAH, GA,
Orders for Rubber Rolling, Hose and packing: also.
Stretched Leather Relting, Filled Promptly.
March 23, 1870. ly
s. G. IIAYi\KS¥ ]]RO.
g:uat>s aKp
(f onunisMon ^frcjjiiiils,
BAY STREET,
Alexander & Rnsscll
Wholesale
HR OXERS.
Cor. Abercarn and Bryan Sts.,
Savannah, Gra.
XX’m. E. Alexander.
May 11, 1870-
XX’m. A. Russell.
J A. MERCIKU,
DEALER IN
Corn, Oats, Ray, Bran,
And all Kinds of
FEED, GRIST, anil MEAK,
CONRIGNMENTS SOLICITED
And Orders Promptly tilled ip yvery channel
of Trade.
153 Bay Street,
Ono door east of Holcombe, IfuD Cp.,
SAVANNAH, - - GEORGIA.
All Orders will receive Froir.pt Attention.
May II, 1870. lS-Iy
E. 9. Smv j lie & Co.,
Importers mid Wh | dcs;dc Dealers in
Crockery, China and Glassware,
and Agents lor Die following Celebrated
SELF-SEALING FRUIT JARS,
SAVANNAH, GEORGIA.
./an. 19, 1870.
Wm. XX Ii. Millais
Importer and Dealer in
Railroad and Steamboat Supplies,
PAINTS OILS and GLASS,
f'Vsrnisliesi Stores,
Lard, Whale, anil Sperm Oils, Burning Oils,
lit cans anil Bairds,
Waste, Packing,
ZBZEUL^XISrGk S50-
102 BRYAN STREET,
SAVANNAH, GA.
2o f 1S70.
M. FERST & CO.,
J VFfOL ESA IE D EA L ERS IN
Wines, Liquors, Segars and
FANCY GROCERIES, CANDIES, Ac,, &c.,
Removed to corner
BAY and WH1TAKJR STREETS
SAVANNAH, GEORGIA.
House in New Yoik, 449 Broadway.
April 6,’1870. tv
in l’ints, Quarts, Y Gallons and Gallons, in
quantities fyuji .1 Gross to lyy Gross. Send
for Buyii-dilvt i'ii I’reserying Fruits and our
priei-4. Liberal I 'isramut. tu the Trade.
E. D. SMYT1IE & CO..
142 Cougryss & 141 St. .1 alien St.,
Savannah, Ga.
June 1, JS70. tf
3Poetry*
I’M GltOXVING OLD.
My days pass pleasantly away,
My nights are blessed with sweetest sleep,
I feel no symptom of decay,
I have no cause to mourn or weep ;
My foes are impotent and shy,
•My friends are neither false nor cold ;
And yet of late I often sigh—
I’m growing old 1
My growing talk of olden times,
My growing thirst for early news,
My growing apathy to rhymes,
My growing love of easy shoes,
My growing hate of crowds aud noise,
Xly growing fear of catching cold,
All ie!l me, in the plainest voice—
I'm growing old |
I'm growing fonder of my staff.
I’m growing dimmer in the eyes,
I’m growing fainter in i\xy laugh,
I'm growing deeper in my sighs.
I'm growing careless of my dress,
I'm growing frugal c;f liiy gold,
I'm growing yyise, I'm growing—yes—
I’m growing old !
I feel it in my changing taste,
I see it ip my changing hair,
I see it ip my growing waist,
1 see it in my growing heir ;
A thousand hints proclaim the truth,
As plapi as truth was pver told,
Thai even in iny haunted youth—
I’m growing ol(l 1
Ah me! my very laurel^ breathe
The tale in my reluctant ears ;
And every boon the hpprs bequeath
But makes me debtor to the years';
E’en tlattcry’s honeyed words declare
The seeret she would lain withhold,
And tell me in ‘"How young you are !”
lTu growing old !
Thanks for the years whose rapid flight
My sombre muse too gladly sings;
Thanks for the gleams of golden light
That tint the darkness of their wings ;
The light that beams from out the sky,
Those heavenly mansipng to unfold,
Where all are blest gnd mme shall sigh
I’m growing old.
John* G. Saxe.
Miscellaneous.
J. 51. HAYWOOD,
Dealer in
GENTS’ FURNISHING GOODS,
COMBS, BRUSHES,
American anil Imported Perfumery,^
Cor. Bull and Bryan Streets,
SAVANNAH, - - GEORGIA.
May 11, 187.i. tf
GEORGIA
Jane 9, IS70-
23—ly*
A,Frei<lenberg4‘lb‘#-
Wholesale and Retail
Dealers in
HEAVY and
FANCY GROCERIES!
Corner of Barnard and Broughton Sts.,
SAVANNA n, GA.,
K EKF constantly on hand a full Jsnpply of Ba
con, Salt, Fish, Foreign and Domestic l.i-
ouors Wines, Havana and West India truits, Se
gars of the best Brands and of direct importation,
Bnver* from the np country, will find it to tlieir
advantage to examine our Slock and prices, before
irehasing elsewhere.
18fi9. S 4 ' 1 *
Aug. 25,
Flimituve Warchousc,
138 BROUGHTON STREET,
Savannah, Georgia,
mg,
and
Now Work made to order, Repair-
Bell Hanging, Mattress Making
Upholstering-,
h h t suy yrv jtotivz:.
A. J. MILLER.
C. V MILLER.
Aug. 25, 1869.
!4-ly
MARBLEWORKS.
Keep your Money In the
“TERRITORY”
BY SENDING YOUR ORDERS TO
J. B. ARTOPE & SON,
COR. 3D AND PLUM,ST$.
MACON, - - - - - - GEORGIA.
JlUiRRltR
or Granite Box Toombs,
Head Stones,Slabs, Vases Mantles,
ST ATUES, &.C.,
Manufactured ot the best material. Parties wish
ing Designs, with estimate, will be furnished at
short notice.
Constant/;/ on hand a Splendid Lot of
ITALIAN AND AMERICAN
IRON RAILING for CEMETERIES
or other enclosures furnished at Man
ufacturers’ prices.
This is one of the oldest establishments in the
country, aud long experience enables them to in
sure satisfaction in every particular.
Jill Orders trill Receive Prompt
•Attention.
Sept. 8, 1869. 8t> ly
LITTLE & PHILLIPS,
a- JR/OOIEZR/IS
AND
So?n vtfjjum
@$etcdianfoj
97 Bay Street,
V.l lVf.V.V.I//,
A genus R>r Russell Coe’s Arnmonialed
Superp
May 11, 1870.
tosphate of Lime.
A. B. lionnwAv, H. Mvkbs ILMyyuis,
Lynchburg, Va. Savannah, tin. Lynchburg, Va
UOODM vN & MYERS,
TOBACCO
Gf/erediaDfij
And Dealers in
Cig’aTS and i^ipes
137 Bag Streep
SAVANNAH, GA.
As Agents for the various Manufactures of
Virginia, \Ue arc prepared to till orders for every
grade and style, at Jliinulaetarers’ prices.
WE PAY THE HIGHEST PRICES FOB
HIDES, BEESWAX, <Src.
May 11, 1 S7o. 18-ly
C. y. HUTCHINS,
Wholesale Dealers in
Hay, Grain % Produce,
133 and 135 Bay Street,
SAVANNAH, - - GEORGIA.
REFERENCES,
Ketebnni &Hartridge, Sav.; Hunter & Gaminoi),
Savannah ; Business Homes generally, Sav ; J. II.
Smith At Co., Baltimore; Marshall, Philips & Co.,
Philadelphia; Williams & Morrison, N. Y.; I.ew
ia Brown & Co.; Boston ; A. L. Griffin <£, Co., Buf
falo ; E. W S. Nefi, fiucinnatii,
Mav II, 1870 1 8-Iv
How the Gi^nt was Caught and
Set to Work..
More than twenty-five bunded years
ago, an old Greek philosopher noticed
that amber, when rttbbed, lm t d a strange
power of attracting to itself light bod
ies, such as straws, hair, and small
sticks. The philosopher wondered and
speculated about this, and made men
tion of it in his writings ; but he died
without having found out any good rea
son for it. At intervals of several hun
dred years, two or three other of the
wise men of ancient times spoke of this
peculiar power of amber and other sub
stances. '1 hey made mention, too, of a
luecr fish that gave shocks to any ani
mal that came in contact with it. They
also noticed—just what you must have
seen many times—that when they took
oil their clothes on a cold night they
heard a crackling noise, and saw sparks
of light, and tha,t t^eU' hair, on being
combed, crackled and sparkled, and
that a cat’s back, \<;hen rubbed the
wrong way, gave out sparks. For more
than two thousand years, generation
after generation of men and women
lived, noticed these queer things, a,nd,
like the old Greek, died without haying
fo'jnd out any reason for them.
But, about the year sixteen hundred,
an Englishman, named Dr. Gilbert, set
to, work trying experiments;- and he
found ou,t tliu.t not only amber, but many
other substances had, when rubbed, this
power of attraction. Slowly and pa
tiently he worked. When people want
t9 find out a scientific truth, they don’t
do it by a lucky gu,ess, or a series of
lucky guesses-. Sometimes it takes a
whole lifetime of experiment and ob
servation to arrive at and establish one
little fact fii science. Many learned
men became interested in the discove
ries of Pr. Gilberst; there was some
strange power of attraction hidden in
these bodies which they could not ac
count for or understand. They made
machines to try experiments; they
spent their time, and money, and brains
in finding out the tru,th; a,nd they
found out a great deal of truth about
this wonderful electric-ifliftence.
Some of the wise men, too, had their
If you are, just send a shock down this
tow-string ; my master has hold of the
other end, and he will understand what
you mean in a minute.”
“Mind your own business,” returned
thunder and lightning with a terrible
flash and groan. “If your master
wants to know about my family rela
tions he must find out in some other
way; that tow string will carry no
messages of mine.”
At this tow-string began to bristle up
and look excited, and the rain water
that had been keeping house in the
next door cloud, and was just starting
earthward, flashed out angrily,
‘‘Thunder and lightning J you are
too proud to own your poor relations !
Ever since the world was made, you
have been careering through the heav
ens with your great flashings and groar-
ings, pretending you did not have any
thing to do on the earth, except to
frighten men to death and tumble down
their houses. But I’ll tell of you : I’ll
soon let that wise man know that you
are not a terrible and mysterious heav
enly being, but a very common resident
of earth, just as I am. I’ve been ach
ing to tell about you for thousands of
years, but I never found any ane on
earth wise enough to understand my
talk..”
Thunder and lightning roared and
flashed in great fury when they heard
this, but rain ^"ater slid down the tow
string with great glee, and with a series
o fjerks and shocks, soon informed the
wise doctor all he wanted to know about
the distinguished relations of electrici
ty. That must have been a sad day
for the old giant, that had ranged heav
ens and terrified the earth since the
creation ; he must have felt humbled
when he had to come down the string
and get into a battle, and perform ex
periments for the doctor.
Ah 1 but it was a great day fbr the
world. The wise doctor laughed
glee, and all the wise men all over the
world laughed and rejoiced at the news
when they heard it,
So the people lost their- terror of this
giant; and he did not dare to go zig
zagging around through the air, knock
ing down people’s houses, for the peo
ple put sharp pointed reds of iron on
their houses, and the great giant did
no.t dare to touch a house thus protec
ted, for the sharp sentinel was ever on
the lookout-
“Don’t touch my house I This way,
my friend. I’ll take you safe to a good
place.” Afid the first thing the old
giant knew, ho was whisked under
ground, tight in prison, where he could
do no mischief. »
But men were not content to keep
the old fellow out of mischief; they
longed to set him to work- The chem
ists found ou,t how to make him useful
in their laboratories. The doctors set
him to healing tlieir patients, and the
siver-sraiths made him plate their wares.
But still some wise men were sure that
he was able to do many more useful
things. They were certain that if they
THE CENTRAL GEORGIAN
RATES OF ADVERTISING.
Book and Job work, of all kinds,
PROMPTLY AND NEATLY EXECUTED
AT THIS OFFICE-
suspicions t,liat electricity was the same
as lightning, the sparkle'corresponding
to the flash, the crackfi^g noise to the
thunder; but tjfiey had no way to prove
their suspicions to be true; they ha4
no way of going qp. to, the clouds to
examine the lightning, and they had; no
way to bring it down to earth.
But Benjamin Franklin, our famous
American citizen, got a notion into his
wise head theB.if fie could get on top
of a high. Steeple- during a thunder
storm, he could get enough lightning to
experiment with. There were no high
steeples ip Philadelphia, where he lived
at that time; how.cvei:,. there was a
very tall one in the process of build
ing, but the w,o?k went on so slowly
.that Dr. Franklin grew tired of wait
ing, and he thought of another way.
He made a kite, the most famous kite
that ever went sailing up from this
round world of ours. It was a small,
cross shaped kite, just like any boy’s
kite, only it was covered with thin silk
instead of paper, for the rain would
have spoiled paper ; and it had some
sharp metallic points sticking out from
the corners. It was a gallant little mes
senger ; it rode fearlessly on the wings
of the wind, away up into the black
sky ; it entered bravely at the portals
of a dark and threatening cloud.
“Good morning, thunder and light-
ning,” called out the little messenger;
“my master sent me to inquire if you
are any relation to the snaps and spar
kles he makes on his electrical machine.
could only invent the right sort of
road, and the right sort of a harness,
they could make the great giant travel
from place to place, carrying the news.
“Ah !” said the wise men, “he is just
the one to carry the news ; he is so
strong, so, tireless, so swift, so secret
just the one, if we can only lftak.e him
do. ifi”'
So they worried tlieir wise heads
night and day for many a year ; they
devised plans and invented machine:
But the old giant laughed their plans
to scorn ; he broke in pieces their ma
chines, he shocked and stunned the
wise heads themselves, lie pranced
away from them and danced in the
air. *
“Ila 1 ha!” he would shout. “Do
you think you can harness me and set
me to work ? I am free ; all the earth
is my home and my hiding-place.—
What are you, O man, that I should
serve you ? You cannot sec me ; you
cannot hold me ; you cannot measure
me ; you, cannot direct and govern me.
My Creator has set me bounds and
laws. I obey Him and them.”
Then the wiso men made answer,
with reverence and faith sublime,
“Sons and heirs of God, your Cr.ea-
I tor, are we. All the subtle forces, and
: great powers of nature are made for us,
and shall minister unto us. Our heri
tage waits till we, through wisdom, shall
enter into it and possess it. You shall
yet serve us, Forceaccording to your
own laws, you shall worjk out our will.”
You remember, in olden time, that a
small pebble-stone slew the great Go-
liah of Gath, So it happened, a quar
ter of a, century ago, that a small
thought entered into a wise man’s head,
and dwelt there until it worked itself
out into life and action, in the shape of
Morse’s American Telegraph.
And the old giant knew, as soon as
he saw this machine, that he was caught
and harnessed, and must go to work.
He knew he was mastered, so he never
winced or fiiiched the least bit; he set
tled himself in the traces, the harness
fitted so well he could not keep frqm
working in it, the road suited his tastes
far better than the old, ragged, zigza<*
route he used to engineer out for him
self.
All over the round world, to-day, the
track of the giant is gleaming in crys
tal and steel; from north to south, from
east to west, in the heavens above, in
the errth beneath, and in the waters un
der the earth, he ceases not to toil for
man. Silent, omnipresent, sleepless,
ahd tireless, this grand ally of civiliza
tion, with his heart of fire ahd his sin
ews of steel, keeps the deep pulses of
humanity throbbing with the saxjje beat,
rejoicing for the same jqv, mourning
for the same sorrow.
So the giant works joyfully jn the
service of mankind; he Wqrlcs apeopdr
ing to his own nature; he obeys the
laws that were set for him from the
creation of the world; when the mind
of man conquered these laws, it coijr
quered him.
The earth is a great storehouse of
occult forces ; the strong men and wise
men of the future shall draw the bolts,
and turn 1 the rusted keys, and bring
forth its hid treasure to enrich and ex
alt the whale human race. Boys and
girls, knowledge and thought are the
keys; grasp them surely, use them
skilfully, enter upon the heritage se
cured to you from the beginning of
time,—Little Corporal Magazine.
Josh Billings on Tite Boots.
I hav in my posseshum, at this mo
ment, a pair ov number nine boots,
with a pair ov number eleven feet in
em.
Mi feet are ez a dog’s noze the fust
time he wears a muzzle.
I think mi feet will eventually chokd
the boots to death.
I liv in hope they will.
I supposed I bad lived long enuif
not to be pbooled agin in this way, but
I hav found that an ounce of vanity
weighs more than a pound ov reazon,
espesbily when a man mistakes a bigg
foot for a small one.
Avoid tite boots, mi friend, az you,
would the grip ov the devil, for many
a man haz caught for life a fust rate
habit for svvearin by encouraging biz
feet to hurt hiz boots.
I hav promised mi two feet, at least
a dozen ov times during mi checkured
life, that they never should be strangled
agin, but I find them to-day az fullov
pain az the stummuk ake, from a sud
den attak ov tite boots.
But this iz solemnly the last pair ov
tite hoots i will ever wear; i will here
after wear boots az big az mi feet, if i
hav to go bare-foot to do it.
I am too old and too respectable to
be a phool enny more.
Eazy boots iz one ov the luxuries ov
life, but i forgit what the other luxury'
iz, but i don’t kno as i care, provided i
can get rid ov this pair ov tite boots.
Enny man kan bav them for seven
dollars, just half what they kost, and
if they don’t make hiz feet ake wusa
than an angle worm in hot ashes, he
needn’t pay for them.
Methuseles iz the only man that i
kan kali to mind now who could hav
afforded to hav wore tite boots, and
enjoyed them; he had a grate deal ov
waste time lew be miserable in,
but life now days iz too short and too
full of aktual bizziness to phool away
enny of it on tite boots.
Tite boots are an insnlt to enny man’s
understanding.
Tite boots hav no bowls of mersy K
their insides are wrath and proiniskioua.
cussing.
Beware ov tite boots.
Laziness.—An incorrigible loafer
being taken to task lor his iaziuess, re
plied : ‘I tel! you, gentlemen, you are
mistaken. I have not a lazy bone in
my body ; but the fact is I. was borq,
tired.’
It was the same fellow, that thre\v-
himself ruefully down under a tree,
one hot day, dosed his eyes, and
languidly murmured—‘Now breathe,
if vou want to—I'll be hanged ifl will.’
It was a second cousin of his, whom
friends decided to bury alive to keep
him from starving, it being a time of
famine, and he being too lazy to work.
On their way to the grave, they met a
benevolent man, who offered to give
him a bushel of corn, rather than to.
see him buried alive.
He taised the coffin lid, and,drawled;
out—
‘Is—it— shelled ?“
‘No, but you can shell it.”
‘Drive—on—boys.’
Anil.a third cousin of his who was a
leading member of the ‘Lazy Men’s
Club.’ At a meeting of this institution
charges were preferred against him for
running down hill ; but he was excused
on this plea that it was easier to run
than to hold back.
A few days ago a bouse of ill-fame
in Detroit was entered by a man of
middle age and serious countenance,
who informed the women that he in-,
tended to offer np prayer for their spifU-.
nal welfare, and proceeded to do 'so,
dropping on lps knees. The inmates
of the house, not desiring his devotion
al service, took advantage of, his posi
tion aod rolled him out.of doors. But
there their triumph endfiL Rising to
bis feet he rushed back; into the house,
striking out vigorously with the carnal
weapons cf qof ure * n a style, that would
have dpqe credit to the prize-ring.
Having^ by such knock-down argil-,
ments cleared a space he again knelt,,
down and finished his prayer. The as
tonished sufferers by this development
of muscular Christianity subdued into
silence, heard themselves descibed and^
their cases stated in prayer with a plain
ness befitting the occasion.
According to the provisions of tba.
enforcement bill, obliteraiing, it does,
all distinctions of color, ‘green hands’
must now receive the same wages as
experienced workman.